


Salvation

by AvengingAngel



Series: Wave a Magic Wand [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Abduction, Abuse, Adoption, Anal Sex, Child Neglect, Childbirth, Children, Domestic Fluff, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, F/M, Forced Pregnancy, Gender or Sex Swap, Hermaphrodites, M/M, Medical Procedures, Mpreg, Oral Sex, Other, Rape, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, Rough Sex, Same-Sex Marriage, probably forgotten some stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-14
Updated: 2017-01-15
Packaged: 2017-12-11 20:47:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 457,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/803122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AvengingAngel/pseuds/AvengingAngel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“You’re going to do all that for me?” Severus nodded at Harry‘s astonished question. “Why?”</p><p>“Because you asked.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

Harry walked down the brightly lit street in Muggle London, not a thought in his head but making it to the Leaky Cauldron to meet the Weasley’s. Hermione and Ron were getting married in a few weeks time, just before they all returned to Hogwarts for their sixth year. Both of the sixteen year olds had gained the permission of their parents to marry before they turned seventeen and Dumbledore had arranged for a private room for them in Gryffindor Tower, for after the wedding. No one, not even Harry, had seen it coming when Ron proposed. No one had even known that they were dating but Hermione explained that, because of the war, they had thought it best to keep it quiet. The Dursley’s had been convinced to let Harry go to London today under the strict threat by Sirius that they would suffer some very unpleasant things if they did anything but bow down and kiss Harry’s arse. So far, the summer was going pretty well for Harry.

After defeating Voldemort just before the end of his fifth year Harry was feeling pretty confident. Every now and then Harry was stopped by some passer by, congratulating him on his success, thanking him for saving them. He knew he got some strange looks for being covered from head to toe in an August heat wave but it was how he felt most comfortable. The mere thought of uncovering himself terrified him. If anyone were to find out… well the mere thought was enough to force him into hiding himself. Only Ron knew, and that was only because he had caught him in their third year. Ron had always said that it didn’t matter, that he didn’t care that Harry was different. But Harry knew that Ron found it weird, found it gross. Harry knew that if anyone else were to find out, Dumbledore, Mrs Weasley, even Sirius, they would be disgusted with him, with what he was.

Suddenly, Harry found himself grabbed from behind, his wand slipping out of his pocket to clatter to the pavement. He was being dragged into a darkened alley, a hand over his mouth and a strong arm around his waist. He could see the Leaky Cauldron, see the salvation that was the fully trained witches and wizards, that was Hermione, brightest witch of her age. His bushy haired companion was emerging from the pub, looking up and down the crowded street for her friend. How could no one see him? How could no one realise something was wrong?

He felt the sudden sensation of being squeezed through a straw; the person holding him was Apparating him somewhere. He closed his eyes against the pressure, hardly wanting to open them when he felt himself touch firm land again. He opened them and found himself being dragged to a large opulent manor. 

‘Okay, don’t panic. Think,’ Harry thought to himself, trying not to let the rising panic take over. ‘We Apparated, my captor is magical. Stronger and taller than me, no breasts, so my captor is a wizard. They’re rich if this manor is anything to go on. Okay, that about covers just about all of the Death Eaters.’ 

As Harry tried to remember which of the Death Eaters hadn’t managed to pay their way out of Azkaban, he was half dragged half carried through the front door and up the marble stairs, barely noticing how lavish the place was. He was in a corridor, being led to a dark oak door. It was opened and he was thrown inside, his head slamming against the wall. His last thought before he passed out was ‘Malfoy.”

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Severus Snape watched as the other members of the Order paced, each giving suggestions on how to find Harry. His wand lay on the table, as if it were a shadow of their missing saviour. Sirius and Remus were frantic, was were the Weasley’s. Severus knew, all of them knew, that the two men and Molly and Arthur all felt like Harry was their child. And, right now, they all felt a part of themselves was missing. They were all panic stricken, all of them having relaxed after the fall of Voldemort. They had all assumed that the danger had passed, that Harry was safe. To have him suddenly vanish was devastating for them.

Severus was very careful to keep his face a blank mask, keep his feelings close to his heart. They would think him a pervert, a paedophile if they knew. If Albus only knew that the hours he had spent with Harry practicing Occlumency, the memories he’d seen, had caused something to grow in him that he had never before felt, never had any experience of knowing. It was so far out of his frame of reference that he did not even have a name for it. All he knew for sure was that he was terrified for what had happened to Harry, terrified that he would never see him again.

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When Harry regained consciousness he found that he was naked and had his hands chained together by heavy manacles, connected by a thick chain to the wall of the luxurious room. What scared him the most was that the room seemed to be dominated by the huge four poster bed that he was lying on. His head throbbed and it was hard for him to make out anything else other than the bed without his glasses. He knew it was night by the darkness that filled the room, which meant that he had been there for a good few hours.

He blinked at the sudden bright light that hit him full in the face as the door was opened. A tall figure entered and Harry curled his legs up towards his chest, trying to cover himself. But he knew it was too late, he knew that the figure had already seen all there was to see of him. The figure lit a few candles and then came to sit on the bed beside him. He smelled of cologne.

“Good evening, Harry,” said the figure in a smooth silky voice. “I would call you Mr Potter but I think we’re past formalities now. And besides, Mister isn’t quite right is it?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Harry replied coolly.

“Now now, don’t lie, it’s rude. Now, are you hungry?”

“What?”

“I wouldn’t be much of a host if I didn’t feed you before we get down to the matter at hand.”

“What matter at hand? What are you talking about?”

“All in good time. Now, are you hungry?”

Harry kept his mouth shut but his stomach rumbled loudly and he felt blood rush to his face. He looked away in embarrassment but was sure his captor was smirking at him. Harry jumped as his glasses were placed carefully on his face. He looked up into the grey eyes of Lucius Malfoy.

“Now, food,” Lucius said, holding up a plate of what looked like toast with marmalade.

“I don’t want any.”

“Why? It’s good food. I could get you something else if you like. Anything at all.”

“It’s all the same. I don’t want anything from you.”

A look of comprehension crossed Lucius’ face. “Ah, I see. You fear I will poison you. Well,” he said. He lifted a piece of toast and Harry watched as he tore off a piece and popped it into his mouth. Harry waited a few minutes, watching for any sign of poison. “See? No harm has come to me. It’s not poisoned. Will you eat now?” Lucius asked calmly.

Harry nodded and had to have Lucius feed him the toast as his hands were chained in a way that held them above his head. After the third helping of toast from the self refilling plate Harry turned his head away from Lucius’ hand.

“Enough?” Lucius asked, setting the plate down at Harry’s nod. He gently wiped the crumbs from Harry’s face, taking longer than was necessary.

“Why am I here?” Harry asked after Lucius helped him drink some pumpkin juice.

“I think you know already.”

“No, I don’t. Why don’t you tell me?”

Lucius smirked at him. “Very well. You are here because of what you are.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You are a hermaphrodite.”

“What’s a hermaphrodite?” Harry asked and Lucius looked at him with a new interest.

“Could it be, perhaps, that you don’t know the name of what you are? Could it be that no one knows of you, that you have discussed this with no one?” Lucius asked with a hint of amazement. Harry looked at him confusedly. He didn’t like where this was heading. “Harry, a hermaphrodite is a being who is both male and female, in varying degrees. A magical hermaphrodite has an equal amount of both gender, a complete working set of both male and female genitalia. When I removed your clothing I examined you. You have both male and female genitalia, both full and complete. You are a magical hermaphrodite.”

“Is that what I’m called?” Harry asked, momentarily distracted from what was happening to him. 

“So I was correct in assuming no one knows?”

“No one except Ron. I was, am, embarrassed about it. I’m enough of a freak without people knowing about this. I never told anyone about me, about what I am, what made me different,” Harry said, turning his head in shame.

“How does Mr Weasley know if you have never talked about it?”

“He was there when I started to bleed. We were in third year, it was late at night. I woke up and I was sitting in a pool of blood. Ron helped me hide it from the others, helped me figure out how to deal with it.”

“You menstruate? Have periods like a woman? You bleed once a month from between your legs?” Lucius clarified at the look of confusion on Harry’s face. 

“For three days.”

“When was your last menstruation? When did it end?” Lucius asked conversationally.

“Two weeks ago. I’m due again in two weeks.”

“And have you experienced male arousal?”

“This is getting very personal. And I feel very uncomfortable being naked in front of you,” Harry said defensively, wishing he could cover himself. Lucius pulled the blanket from the bottom of the bed and covered him to his chin with it.

“I realise that you have grown up wanting to hide your body and feeling ashamed of it. I am only trying to help you understand what you are.”

“Why?”

“Because the legend of the magical hermaphrodite has fascinated me ever since I was at Hogwarts myself. Through you I can understand it more fully.”

Harry felt like his head was spinning. Legend? There was a legend? Now he knew he was right to have hidden himself for so long. He decided the best course of action was to keep Lucius talking, keep him busy so that he didn’t decide to get a better first hand look at him and what made him different.

“So, what do you want to know?” Harry asked calmly, hoping satisfying Lucius’ curiosity would be enough for the time being.

“Have you ever had an erection?

Harry felt himself flush. “Yes.”

“Was it painful?”

“No. I suppose it must feel the way yours does, except….”

“Except?”

“I…I g-get…w-wet, be-between the…the l-legs.” Harry was sure he was glowing like the embers of a dying fire as blood rushed to his face, spreading down his neck and chest.

“Where your female counterpart is located?”

“Yes.”

“Female arousal. I’ve heard that can be quite powerful,” Lucius said, looking slightly impressed. Lucius let his eyes rake down Harry’s body, momentarily stopping at where Harry’s privates were covered by the blanket. “Is it pleasurable?”

“I don’t know. I suppose it feels good when it happens, like when you take a hot shower when you’re tense. I never really thought about it.”

“Have you never pleasured yourself?”

“No. I…erm…I…”

“You don’t know how?”

Harry shook his head and Lucius let one of his fingers trail down Harry’s pale arm, smirking as Harry flinched.

“You said there was a legend,” Harry said quickly.

“The legend of the hermaphrodite says that someone like you will bear the male child of the first wizard who beds you, and that child will be very powerful. There are rumours that the Dark Lord’s mother was a hermaphrodite that passed as a female, and Dumbledore’s mother as well.”

“What else is in this legend?” Harry asked, not liking the sound of this.

Lucius stood and began to remove his robes, Harry becoming more nervous. “Just that a hermaphrodite is born roughly every fifty years. The law, however, is more informative on creatures like you.” The robe hit the floor and Lucius began to unbutton his white shirt.

“What law?” Harry asked, starting to squirm as the mans broad shoulders and back came into the dim candlelight. He had defeated Voldemort, most terrifying wizard of all time, and yet Lucius was scaring him more now than Voldemort had ever managed to.

“The law passed over a thousand years ago and enforced by the Ministry.” He reached for his belt.

“What does it say?”

“It says that the wizard who takes your maidenhead owns you.”

“Maidenhead?”

“Your virginity. The wizard who first has sex with you owns you.”

“Why does that matter?” Harry asked. “Why is it more informative?” Lucius’ trousers were removed and Harry noticed that the man had not been wearing shoes or socks.

“It matters because I intend to be the one to own you. Your child will be mine, Harry.” He turned and looked at Harry as he pulled the black ribbon from his hair, smirking through the curtain of the long pale waterfall.

“I don’t want to be owned. I…I’m not ready to have sex with someone, anyone. Mr Malfoy, I barely know you,” Harry said. “Please, don’t do this.”

“I know you’re scared, the first time is always difficult. I will be gentle,” Lucius said dismissively, pulling off his boxers and moving towards the bed.

“When they find me, they’ll lock you away. Someone will find me. I defeated the Dark Lord, they won’t let you keep me.”

“Oh, Harry. You don’t understand. The law is very clear on this. Once I bed you, I will own you, I will be your master. They will not be able to take you from me, to do so would be to land themselves in Azkaban. And you are mistaken when you think someone will find you,” Lucius said calmly, turning back the cover, exposing a trembling Harry. “This wing of the manor has not been used, not even stepped in, since my father died ten years ago. No one will find you, my little legend.”

“Please, don’t do this,” Harry begged as Lucius climbed onto the foot of the bed. He kicked out as he touched his leg, fighting against the hands as they travelled up his body to rest on his hips, the older wizard sitting on his shins and using his strong thighs to keep him still. “I’ll leave, if you unchain me I’ll leave and I’ll never tell anyone about this. I’ll keep my mouth shut, it’ll just be our little secret.”

“I’m not going to let you go, Harry,” Lucius said, caressing Harry’s sides.

Harry began to panic, felt his heart pound. The plate and glass beside the bed exploded as his magic soared out of control. He felt Lucius’ cold hands on his skin, felt the man kiss his face, his neck. 

“Please,” Harry whispered. He opened his tear filled green eyes to see Lucius looking down on him in amusement. 

“Take deep breaths. Try to stay calm. If you begin to panic too much I will render you unconscious,” Lucius ordered. Harry looked into his eyes and grasped that the man was serious, and Harry decided that he would rather know what was happening to him than have it done while he was out cold. He glanced down and saw the mans thick erection. It looked too large to fit inside him, he had never even been able to use tampons. He looked into the serious gaze of his captor and decided to save his panic for later, for when it was over. He had no way to stop the man. He took a deep shaky breath and nodded at Lucius. “Good. Now, I will try to be gentle, but I have heard that for a female to lose their virginity can be somewhat painful. Feel free to cry out, no one will hear you. I’m going to continue now. Feel free to ask me anything along the way.”

Harry realized that Lucius only cared about using him. It was slightly disconcerting to have Lucius reassure him in such a cold manner. He didn’t believe him for a second when he said he would be gentle. The man was a Death Eater, they thrived on causing pain. He only knew of one that didn‘t. He let his mind turn away from those kinds of thoughts. It wouldn‘t do him any good to think of that particular man now. He felt Lucius stroke his thigh, kiss his neck. His breath hitched as his hand moved to his inner thigh, dangerously close to what he didn’t want touched.

Lucius pulled back and ran his hands over his chest. Looking at Lucius’ chest, Harry realized that he was made differently. His chest wasn’t hard, it was softer, kind of like what Hermione’s looked like when she and Ron ran around in bathing suits last weekend at the Burrow. His were small, barely there, almost flat breasts, but they were definitely breasts instead of male pecks. Lucius’ hands moved lower, pressing gently on his lower abdomen.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked, deciding he’d rather know than guess.

“Just admiring you, the wonderful way the gods put you together.”

“Oh. Lucius?” Harry said timidly. The blonde’s hands stilled.

“Yes?”

“I don’t want this to happen. I don’t want you to do this. But you’re going to anyway and I realize I can‘t stop you. But I do want you to do something,” Harry said, his voice bolder than he thought he could make it sound.

“What’s that, Pet?”

“I want you to tell me when you’re going to do it.”

“Which part?”

Harry flushed but looked the man in the eye. “The part where you’re inside.”

“Very well.”

Nothing more was said after that. Harry fixed his eyes on the canopy of the bed above him. As hard as he tried he couldn’t shut it out, couldn’t shut his mind off. Tears began to fall down his face as Lucius’ hands travelled.

His thighs were opened and cool hands touched him in places he had always been disgusted by. He flinched at the hand on his penis, stroking him, the other hand on his testicles, caressing them. He gasped as a finger brushed something just behind his balls.

Lucius smirked as Harry gasped. It mattered nothing to him if Harry enjoyed this or not. He had used pretty words to try and control the panic. Exploding glass was not what he desired. He didn’t want to do this with Harry unconscious, it was less enjoyable that way. Harry seemed to respond to the threat well enough. He just hoped Harry screamed for him. 

Lucius spread the thin thighs further, looking down at the tender flesh. Incredible. Harry was fully endowed with both a penis and testicles, though they were located a little further forwards than his own. On the loose skin at the back of Harry’s scrotum was the small nub of his clitoris, below that the folds of his labia. Lucius parted the lips and saw the small hole of Harry’s vagina, then his perineum and, finally, his anus.

Lucius stroked Harry’s clitoris, watching the lithe creature jerk at the new sensation, smirking. He let his fingers trail down over the lips, slip between them. He found Harry wet, despite his fear. The sprite began to sob and Lucius ignored him. Lucius forced his finger inside, felt the muscle clench tight around his digit. He was going to tear the young hermaphrodite and, quite honestly, he really didn’t care. In actual fact, it kind of excited him, the thought of the blood.

Harry felt the finger removed and buried his face in his arm. He knew that this was it, that he was about to be violated. He felt so helpless but he found a slight silver lining. 

At least it wasn’t Voldemort doing this to him.

He cried out as something hard and slick slid into his arse without warning. It was smooth and solid, definitely not flesh. He felt himself tighten immediately around it, so excruciatingly painfully. He tried to lift himself away from it and heard Lucius chuckle. He looked down momentarily and saw Lucius’ cane in his hands, sliding back and forth. He let his head fall back and tried to angle his hips down, make it harder for him. It was forced into him a few more times, deeper and deeper, and then Lucius seemed to grow bored of watching him fight against the pain. It was yanked from him and he gasped. 

There was nothing for a few moments, no touches, and then his fingers probed his anus, slick and firm. He groaned as his sore anal tissues were pressed. He felt the sting of damaged flesh and knew that he was bleeding. The cool hands moved to his male genitals again and Harry cried out as something was tied tightly around them, cutting into the delicate skin. They were pushed up and a spell was uttered, his penis and testicles staying against his stomach as the hands were removed. Fresh tears fell down his face, this time from humiliation. 

“Harry, it’s time. I’m going to take you now,” Lucius said as the pale hands pushed his thighs further apart, opening him. Harry nodded and waited for it to happen, his face buried in his arm as he sobbed in mortification. It felt like an eternity before he felt something hard and thick try to push into him. A growl of frustration from his captor. His thighs were pushed even further apart, his feet losing contact with the mattress as his knees were supported in the crook of the mans elbows. Strong hands gripped his waist and it was forced inside without any more warning, buried to the hilt in one rapid stroke, Lucius‘ hips flush against his skin. Harry was screaming in pain, fighting against the chains and the man inside him as he felt the blood slowly trickle down from where Lucius was inside.

“Please! Please take it out! Please stop!” Harry screamed. It was to no avail as it was pulled out and thrust back in, the pain getting worse, Lucius moaning in pleasure. He was being ripped in two, he was dying, he was sure of it. Over and over he begged the man to stop but it didn’t work, he kept on fucking him, brutally using his body, time stretching out into an eternity. He screamed and cried, each moment worse than the last. Suddenly, teeth sank into his nipple and he felt the flesh tear. The same treatment was given to the other nipple, Harry feeling the blood trickling down his chest to the sheets beneath him. 

“Help me! Someone please help me!” Harry screamed at the crack of something breaking in his hips, or maybe his legs. Lucius chuckled above him, his sharp fingernails ripping the pale flesh. The sound of Harry’s screams went straight through him, making him impossibly harder, making him thrust into him violently, feeling the blood coat his cock. Lucius surged forwards and sank his teeth into the sprites shoulder, groaning out his release as his seed spilled into the sixteen year old, Harry feeling the snap of one of his wrists breaking. The older wizard lay there, gasping for air as Harry sobbed, his cock still inside him. He withdrew and let the slim legs fall.

Harry lay there, his tears still falling as his screaming body protested at Lucius’ weight on him. “It’s over. It’s done,” Lucius moaned into his ear. “Just one more thing and I shall leave you be for the time being.”

Lucius sat up and looked proudly at the blood staining the pale skin, the damage his passion had caused. He reached over to where his cane lay on the bed and picked up the item lying next to it. It was a small cork shaped piece of pewter, wider than it was long, its edges pitted with holes through which spikes would emerge. He took it in his fingertips and pushed it into Harry, pushing his seed up with it. Once it was in as far as he could get it and Harry was sobbing again in pain, Lucius removed his fingers. He withdrew his wand from his cane and pushed it into the sprite, muttering a spell.

Harry sobbed in pain as something hard was pushed up him, surely it could get no worse. But it suddenly did. Harry screamed as the hard thing inside him suddenly embedded itself in his passage, sharp blades stabbing his abused internal tissues.

“To ensure conception,” Lucius said offhandedly as he dressed once more. Harry watched him dress, and leave the room, hearing the door lock, before curling into as much of a ball as he could and letting the pain and panic engulf him, letting himself cry.

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Sirius lay on the bed and let Remus pull him back into his arms. Sobs wracked his body, he couldn’t breathe, couldn’t see, couldn’t feel anything but the pain of his missing godson. He had gotten him cleared, Harry had gotten him cleared of all charges, he was a free man and Harry was meant to be moving in with them permanently at Christmas. This wasn’t supposed to be happening, not this, not Harry. Sirius felt the loss of his godson so clearly that suddenly he was transported back fifteen years, back to the loss of his best friend, of the man he considered his brother, of his brothers wife. 

“I can’t do this, Remus! I can’t lose him, not him, not Harry,” Sirius sobbed.

Remus let his own tears fall, gathered his husband closer to him. Sirius cared about Harry so much. He felt his husband cling to him, grasping at him as if he could keep the pain away, as if he could bring the boy back to them.

“We’ll find him. I promise, Siri, we’ll find him,” Remus soothed, not sure if he even believed himself the way he needed Sirius to. 

He and Sirius would never have their own child. Male pregnancies were possible, though rare, in the Wizarding world but with Remus’ lycanthropy it was not an idea they could entertain. Remus knew that the Ministry would never allow them to adopt or use a surrogate, the Werewolf restrictions made it impossible. They both wanted so badly to be parents but it wasn’t an option, not with Remus as a werewolf and Sirius as a recently cleared ex-convict. But Harry was their chance to be the fathers they had always wanted to be, the chance to help the young man set himself right after all of the neglect the Dursley’s had put him through. 

They had only been allowed to adopt Harry because he was Sirius’ godson, and he was the Boy-Who-Lived. Clearing Sirius’ name and securing himself as their adopted son had been the only things Harry had used his fame for, so the Minister had agreed without question.

Sirius cried himself to sleep and Remus let himself slip from the room, let himself travel the stairs and hallways until he found himself in Harry’s room. It was the same one that Harry had shared with Ron the summer before but it looked completely different. It had been painted in the deep rich blue of Harry’s choosing, held the extravagant bed that Sirius had insisted on, the extortionately expensive sheets and ridiculous amount of pillows. Sirius had been so excited to hang the new curtains, put together the brand new chest of drawers, clear out the closet. Harry’s things had already begun to fill the room. His Gryffindor posters were on the walls, pictures of his friends and of Lily, of James, some of his books and clothes were already in their proper places. Good god, it looked like Harry had just stepped out momentarily.

Remus felt his own loss crush him, let it force him to his knees, let it force the gasping sobs from him. Harry was missing, their Harry was missing. 

Sweet Merlin, their son was missing.

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Lucius only spoke to Harry once more, three weeks after the first time he raped him to tell him he was pregnant. During that brief conversation, Lucius also told him that it was September first. He had been missing for almost month and Harry came to realise that maybe Lucius had been right. No one would find him. In all honesty, Lucius confused him more than anything else. He fed him and bathed him, all in complete silence but with amazing tenderness. Unfortunately, the meals from Lucius became fewer and farther between the longer he was kept there. As the snow began to fall outside the window Harry realized that it had been more than three weeks since he had eaten. He supposed it must have been something resilient in him that kept him alive still. Lucius continued to take him roughly, each time a little more cruel and inhumane than the last. 

The only thing Harry could be glad of was than no one could see him like this.

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Severus gazed at the page in front of him, not even seeing it. He couldn’t clear his mind, couldn’t forget the pain of the ache in his chest. He had realized some time ago that what he felt for Harry was stronger than he was, that it was taking him over. Severus paused in his pretend reading to notice Ronald Weasley slowly enter the library. He looked around and, on spotting Severus, moved towards him.

“Professor Snape?”

“Yes, Mr Weasley?”

“There’s something you should know about Harry, something the Order should know. Well, I don’t actually know if any of you do know. But if you don’t…” 

“Mr Weasley,” Severus interrupted. “Whatever it is you think we should know, you should tell me. Harry has been missing now for three months. Anything you have to tell might help us in locating him.”

Ron sat down opposite him. “Well, that’s the thing. Harry’s not quite a him.”

“What do you mean?”

“Harry has periods, like a girl. He bleeds once a month.”

“How do you know this?”

“I helped him hide it. I was there the first time it happened.”

“Why didn’t you tell anyone this before now?”

“I wasn’t sure if it was important. Harry made me swear never to tell anyone about him. But the other day, in the meeting, we were all trying to figure out why he might have been taken, and when Mad-Eye mentioned that Harry might be a plaything for a Death Eater it kind of played on my mind. It made me think that Harry bleeding like a girl might be the reason he was taken.”

Severus sat there stunned. It couldn’t be, could it? Harry couldn’t be a….no, it wasn’t possible. It couldn’t be. But doubt played in his mind. Of all the memories he had seen in Harry’s mind the ones that suddenly stuck out were the ones of Harry in the bathroom. He hadn’t meant to go that far, get that deep in Harry’s mind and Severus had tried to forget them, give the youth a semblance of privacy. One in particular of Harry holding a squashy looking package as he entered Moaning Myrtles bathroom struck him.

“Mr Weasley, tell no one of what you have just told me. If you tell anyone, I will personally see to it that you and your wife never have marital relations again, am I understood?” Severus snarled as he gathered up his things. At Ron’s terrified nod, he sped from the library and straight up to the deserted girls bathroom.

“Myrtle?” he called out.

The transparent girl floated out to him and gave him a wary look. “Yes, Professor?”

“Myrtle, I need to ask you something and I need you to answer me honestly, no matter what anyone has made you promise.”

She continued to float there, looking at him suspiciously, and he took that as a sign of her agreement. 

“Myrtle, does Harry Potter come in here a lot?” She nodded. “How often does he come to see you?”

“Every month.”

“Does he come just to spend time with you, Myrtle, or is there a reason other than that that brings him here?”

“Maybe.”

“Myrtle, is Harry special?” She nodded. “Myrtle, you know Harry’s been taken, don’t you?” Another nod. “Well, he might have been taken because of him being special. Myrtle, I need you to tell me why Harry comes here. I need to know how he’s special.”

“He made me promise. I saw him and he said if I didn’t tell he’d keep coming to see me. So I didn’t tell and he kept coming, once a month all school year since his third year. He sits and talks to me afterwards,” Myrtle said, sounding rather proud that Harry had chosen her to confide in, chosen her bathroom to deal with his problem.

“Myrtle, someone has taken him. They might be hurting him. I know you promised and I find that very admirable, that you want to keep that promise. But Harry is in trouble and I need to know, Myrtle. I need you to tell me what you know about him.”

“Promise you won’t tell him I told you?”

“I promise.”

“I suppose if it’s to help him then he won’t mind you knowing. He said some very nice things about you. What do you want to know first, what he said or what he is?”

“That is entirely up to you, Myrtle.”

“Well, he told me that he thinks you’re rather nice. That he feels safe with you. That if he was going to tell a teacher, well, anyone really, about himself that it would be you. He told me things he couldn’t tell his friends.”

“That’s very nice of him to say about me. And very nice to say about you, Myrtle. It sounds like he values you and your friendship very much. You must be very special to him if he trusted you with his secret,” Severus said, watching her cheeks become cloudy and as she swayed side to side, an embarrassed sort of smile on her face. He smiled inwardly. Very few females could resist flattery, even dead ones. “Now, can you tell me why he comes here? Why does he need to hide, Myrtle?”

“Oh, that one’s easy! Harry comes here because he has both bits.” The information was coming more easily now and Severus was hanging on her every word.

“I don’t understand.”

“He has boy bits, all wrinkly!” At this she let out a high pitched giggle and Severus smiled at her in spite of himself. “Oh, and he has girl bits, like I used to have! He has them both, and he comes in here when he gets his monthlies. That’s what’s special about him. He’s a little bit of both. When he gets his monthlies he doesn’t sleep very well, he gets terrible cramps, so he comes and sits in here, talking to me. He told me some very rude dreams he’s had about you, Professor! Harry likes you! You know, like his red head friend likes the Granger girl?”

“Is that so?”

“Yes. He said that you were different than everyone thinks you are. He told me things he’s seen in your head, that you were nice to the little girl.”

Severus hoisted himself onto a windowsill, settling his feet on the rim of the sink below it. He let his mind travel back to the memory Harry had inadvertently discovered that fated Saturday evening in his office when he had accidentally entered his professor’s mind. It wasn’t the first time he’d done it, but it was the first time he had seen something different in Severus. 

Her dark hair flew out behind her as she ran from his drunken yelling. Her pale skin was marked by dark bruises. She tripped over her own feet and went tumbling to the floor, crying out in pain as her knee connected with the stone floor. Sudden hands grabbed her and carried her with them, the two dark haired figures locking themselves in the antique armoire near the kitchen. 

Severus looked into the dark eyes of his three year old sister, Solarin. He was home for the Christmas holidays in his seventh and final year. He wouldn’t have come back if he didn’t fear so much for her safety around their violent alcoholic father. Her small body trembled and shook as she sobbed silently, her tiny fingers clutching at his t-shirt. 

“Sevus,” she mumbled. He held her closer and wiped at her bleeding knee with a tissue from his pocket, wiped away her tears. Professor Dumbledore had promised Severus he would help him get custody of her as soon as he turned seventeen in July. Solarin was the only person that meant anything to him and he would be damned if he let his father destroy her.

Severus looked at the young ghost and smiled sadly. “My sister. She’s in her early twenties now, she lives in London, working at a Muggle store selling toys. She enjoys it.”

“She’s very young.”

“Yes. A late surprise for my mother. My mother died when I was seventeen, Solarin was about three, maybe four, the details escape me now. I took custody of her, raised her. We’re very close.”

“I never heard you had a sister.”

“Very few people know about her. Solarin is special. She has a gift. If people found out about it they would use her.”

“I told you how Harry’s special. Tell me her gift. I promise I won’t tell anyone,” Myrtle said. Severus looked at her. She had kept Harry’s secret until it was needed to help save him. But Solarin was all he had, all that he held dear, apart from Harry.

“You promise?” Severus asked and the little ghost nodded. “Solarin is empathic and a telepath. She can read peoples thoughts and emotions without them knowing she‘s doing it. She can also see the future. She is a true Seer. It makes her very powerful.”

“That sounds like fun,” Myrtle giggled and Severus smirked. 

“Solarin didn’t think so at first, she had terrible trouble learning to control it. But once she got a handle on it, she had great fun. Myrtle, do you think Harry’s all right?” Severus asked her, finally admitting that he was desperately worried about the young man.

Myrtle looked at the usually stoic professor, suddenly so unsure, so worried, and wanted in some way to comfort him. She floated to the last stall, the one Harry always used, and pulled out the small battered book. She floated over to Professor Snape and passed him the book. It was all she knew to do. She knew her hug would just chill him to the bone, and her words would not comfort him the way he needed. 

“It’s Harry’s. He hides it here. If someone starts to get close to it I begin to wail at them,” Myrtle admitted.

“Thank you, Myrtle. You’re a very good friend to him.”

“Professor, I’m sure Harry’s all right. Harry defeated the Dark Lord. He’s tougher than people think, like you.”

Severus knew that most people wouldn’t take comfort in the words of a teenage girl that had been dead for fifty years, but it was all he had. 

He smiled at her.

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Draco Malfoy flopped back onto his bed, Pansy Parkinson lying beside him. He huffed in frustration.

“It doesn’t matter, Draco. It happens to every guy. You’re probably just stressing about something,” she soothed, rolling onto her side to rub his bare arm with her soft hand. 

His skin crawled at her touch but he didn’t let on. Pansy wouldn’t be so supportive of his impotency if she knew the truth. He sat up and sat on the edge of the bed, his elbows on his knees, his hands dangling between them. He hung his head and sighed. Pansy’s hands slid along his bare back and he inwardly shuddered. He hated being touched, he was just thankful that it wasn’t just her who caused this reaction in him.

“It’s just the stress your father is putting on you. Once we go through with this arranged marriage all the pressure will stop,” she said, laying her head on his shoulder.

“And after the marriage comes the pressure of us producing an heir. It won’t stop, Pansy,” Draco countered.

“I can deal with them.”

“I’m suddenly struck by the thought that you have no idea what you’re getting into,” he scoffed. She kissed his shoulder and scrambled off the bed, buttoning up her blouse.

“Maybe not. But I know that me and you are going to get married. And then I’ll be Mrs. Draco Malfoy. That’s all that matters, right?” She kissed him on the top of his bent head and walked to the door. “Just try to relax. I’ll see you later.”

He heard the door close and he breathed a sigh of relief. He locked the door and stepped into his shower, letting the hot water run over him. It wasn’t that he didn’t like Pansy, he did. As girls went she was one of the less insipid ones. She had her moments where she was overly emotional but they were few and far between. He was thankful, in his own way, that it was her he was destined to marry. 

For as long as he could remember she had been there, the two of them had known that they were going to be married. And it terrified him, the thought of marriage. The thought of consummating it.

Draco could not remember a time when he hadn’t hated being touched, hated the feel of another on his skin. As for himself, his skin had always felt a little too tight, a little too wrong on his frame. He had always felt off, like there was something about him that was too different to be ignored. He had once asked his father about it, told his father of his unease in his own skin. His father had told him that all young men felt that way, that it was normal to feel like you were different and didn’t fit in, that it would pass. But it hadn’t, it had just gotten worse. Draco had just become better at hiding it.

He let his hand travel down, supporting himself against the tiled wall with his other arm. He began to stroke it, trying to arouse himself. He let his mind wander through all the fantasies his friends had told to him over the years, but nothing struck him. He kept stroking, letting his mind wander aimlessly. He stood there for nearly an hour, his hand working while his mind travelled. He couldn’t do it.

His cock lay limp in his hand.

The thing that worried Draco the most was that he had never had an erection. He was sixteen years old and he had never had an erection, never had a wet dream, never even got hot under the collar. 

He growled in frustration and finished up his shower quickly, dressing and beginning to pack for when he went home for Christmas tomorrow. Maybe he would talk about it with his father.

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Molly Weasley looked over the kitchen of Grimmauld Place, surveying the hoards of people. Her whole family had come for Christmas this year, Hermione’s family joining them as well. The Order and their various family members had joined them as well, even Dumbledore had brought along his brother Alberforth. They had decided that Grimmauld Place would be better suited for the large numbers and the old house was full to breaking point.

She was in her element cooking for them all, being a mother hen on overload. But she couldn’t help but notice the space that Harry would have filled. She viewed him as some sort of black haired Weasley, viewed him with the same love and care she viewed her own boys. Her heart was broken at his absence, broken for what might be happening to him while they searched for him, while they celebrated without him. Her eyes landed on Sirius, Remus talking to him quietly. The two of them looked so lost without their boy to make their first uncomplicated Christmas complete. 

Molly set Harry’s pile of gifts aside and turned to her family and friends, ready to celebrate Christmas Eve with them, pasting a fake cheery smile on her face and burying her guilt.

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Severus stood at the back of the smoky overcrowded bar, sipping a cold beer from the bottle, his eyes fixed on the stage. It had been years since he left Hogwarts for Christmas, finding solace from the darkness of his dungeons. This year, however, he had felt the inexplicable urge to see her. He had spent the last few days decorating Spinners End with gaudy decorations, buying presents and other festivities, all in preparation for this moment. He knew the small rundown house in the bad area would never be as cheery as it should have been at this time of year, but it was the best he could do. He wanted to give her the best he could, he had always wanted the best for her. He had even donned Muggle clothing for the first time in over a decade so that she wouldn’t be embarrassed in any way by his sudden presence.

She was a powerful authority on the stage, her dark clothes making her dark hair and eyes so startling in her pale face. She brandished the microphone in the same way she brandished a wand, with cool calm confidence. She owned the stage, owned the song, owned the crowd. Her dark eyes momentarily fixed on him and he smiled at her look of surprise, her sudden shock at seeing him there watching her but she didn’t falter in the song. She let the mike drop and danced on the stage, laughing at something one of the other players up there with her had muttered in her ear. Severus grimaced at the glint of the thin silver hoop through her left nostril, rolled his eyes at the tattoo that peaked at him as her shirt rose a few centimetres. 

‘Why on earth would she do that to herself?’ he thought, his eyes focussing on the dark eye makeup and lipstick. ‘What is her obsession with looking like death?’ He grit his teeth as she let one of the players grope her in some semblance of dance, though Severus considered it something akin to a clothed form of fornication. He suddenly wanted to decapitate that Muggle touching her.

At the end of the night, when most of the patrons had left to rejoin their families, she made her way over to him.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“Why should anything be wrong? Do I need a reason to see you?” he asked defensively.

“Well, you haven’t been to see me at Christmas since I was seventeen and fresh out of Hogwarts and, as I remember, you only came so you could check up on me. You never even left my flat. That was four, no five, years ago, in case you’d lost track. You like your dungeons where you can be Scrooge. So why are you here?”

“I wanted to see you.”

“Why?”

He sighed and looked into her dark eyes, eyes that matched his own. “I felt that, this year, I didn’t want to be alone. If you’d rather be with your friends I can go back to Hogwarts,” he said quietly, hoping she wouldn’t send him away.

“I didn’t say I didn’t want you here, that I didn’t want to spend the holidays with you. I just wondered why.”

He let her envelope him in a hug, taking comfort in her slim weight in his arms, his tears threatening to fall. She pulled back suddenly, looking him in the eye.

“Sweet Merlin! What the hell is going on inside your head?” she exclaimed.

“What?”

“Sevus, I haven’t gotten a wave of emotion like that from you since dad died when I was eleven. Something’s happened to you. Spill it.”

“Sol, I really don’t want to talk about it right now.”

She quirked an eyebrow at him. “All right. But pretty soon, me and you are going to have words.”

He smiled and took his sisters hand, leading her out of the bar, Apparating them to Spinners End. He smiled genuinely at her child’s excitement of the decorations and gifts, let her try and guess what was contained in the packages. He took comfort in the ritual of tucking her into bed, took comfort in the fact that he could at least keep one of the people he cared about safe.

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Draco sat in the sitting room staring into the flames of the dying fire. His parents had gone to bed and he was to return to Hogwarts in a few days, just after the New Year. His Christmas vacation had not gone as he had planned. Once again his father had assured him that all young men felt out of place, reassured once again that it would pass, that he would grow out of it. He hadn’t had the courage to tell his father of his inadequacies in the bedroom. How did one tell their father that they couldn’t get an erection?

Draco sighed and decided to walk through the manor, decided that it might clear his head. He let his mind wander as he walked, feeling his stress pound with every step. Before he knew it, he had no idea where he had wandered to. He had never been in this part of the manor before. It had been closed off since his grandfather passed away when he was six. Draco looked around interestedly at the ornate tapestries, the antique statues. Nothing like these were displayed in any other part of the manor and he supposed they must have been his grandfathers choice, something his mother had never liked. 

He let his curiosity lead him further into the disused wing. That was strange. He could hear screaming. The sounds that reached his ears terrified him. Someone was in true pain, in agony, begging for mercy, for freedom. It sounded scarily like the sounds Voldemort had elicited from his victims, and that was what scared him the most, that he was suddenly reminded of that evil man. 

Draco padded towards the sound, the sobbed pleas getting louder and more horrific with every step. He approached an ornate oak door that was slightly ajar and looked in through the gap. He clapped his hand over his mouth to keep himself from screaming.

His father was brutally raping someone chained to the wall behind the bed. The obviously starved figure was screaming out in pain, begging his father to stop. Draco felt tears spring to his eyes at the sight of the blood gushing from the place his father was slamming into, the blood pouring from the sprites chest, from everywhere really. There wasn’t a part of her that wasn’t bruised, bloody or scarred. Draco had to shove his hand into his mouth as the figure turned it’s head, the bright green eyes turned towards the door, unseeing.

Harry.

His father let out a groan of release, stopped moving, pulled off of his schoolmate. This was impossible. Harry had been here in his home for all these months and Draco had never even thought of it, never even considered that his father might have had something to do with his disappearance. Draco saw his fathers hand move between Harry’s battered legs and heard the scream from Harry, his stomach suddenly threatening to give up everything as his father stood to dress. 

‘Good Merlin, Harry should be dead,’ Draco thought as the emaciated body was revealed, broken bones poking against the skin too tight on the too slim frame. He quickly padded round the corner as his father emerged, striding off confidently to the other parts of the manor. Draco didn’t know how long he had but he knew he couldn’t just ignore what he’d seen.

He hurried back down the hall, slipped into the room, his eyes darting about for any sign of his father. He rushed to the bed, Harry trying to scramble away.

“Harry, it’s me, it’s Draco,” he whispered, watching the gaunt figure stop trying to scramble away from him.

“You come to take me too? Your father decided to share me with his heir?” Harry said, his voice barely a whisper.

“What? No! Harry, have you been here all this time?” Draco asked as he tried to remove the chains from the mangled wrists.

“Yes. Help me, please,” Harry begged, looking up at Draco as his schoolboy nemesis gently put his glasses on his face.

“I’m going to get you out of here.”

They remained like that for the next hour, Draco struggling with the manacles. Finally Draco sighed. 

“I’m so sorry, Harry. I can’t get them off.” Draco looked at the door and then down at Harry. “Harry, I’m going to go and get someone, get some help. I need to take off your glasses, he can’t know I know you’re here.”

“Please, don’t leave, don’t leave me! Please,” Harry begged, his voice rasping.

“Harry, I’m coming back. I’ll be back as soon as I can, I’ll be back with help, I swear. But I can’t get the manacles off and I can’t get you out of here without getting them off. I’ll be back as soon as I can. Hang in there,” Draco said, gently pulling off the glasses and putting them back where he found them. “I’ll be right back.”

Draco hurried to the door and then, with a final glance at the crying figure on the bed, he padded quickly to the dying fire in the living room. He grabbed some floo powder and chucked it into the flames, calling out the first thing that had come to his mind.

“Spinners End.”

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Severus looked at the battered book Myrtle had given him. He had not told anyone except Solarin of his discovery of Harry’s true anatomy, deciding that it would not help them find the sprite and that Harry would probably want it kept secret. Solarin had only been told because of his inability to keep something that important to him from her. He glanced at Solarin, asleep on the sofa. He smiled at her. He had spent most of the night pouring out to her everything he had been keeping inside. As usual, she displayed a maturity that still surprised him. She had rationalised that if Harry was ever found then life was too short to wish it away on wasted dreams. She told him that if it was true that Harry felt the same for him then he should let him know. She said to him that a life half lived with missed opportunities and forgotten dreams was no life at all.

So he opened the book. It turned out to be half diary, half scrapbook. There were many entries on Harry’s own views on what he was, most of them revealing that Harry felt himself to be some kind of freak of nature, an abomination. There were other mundane entries on Harry’s day to day life, his lessons, his friends. None of this was of great interest but Severus found himself drinking in every word, revelling in the fact that he could picture Harry performing as mundane a task as doing his History of Magic homework. 

Into the book Harry had secured several pictures of his friends and himself, all Muggle developed so they did not move. Alongside these were snippets from newspapers and magazines, and a few drawings that Harry himself had done.

Finally, at the very last page that was filled in, Severus found a diary entry that made his heart leap.

‘Professor Snape looked at me differently today. I look into those dark eyes and I feel for sure he knows. Mind you, if I was going to tell anyone about my deformities it would be him. I wonder how he’d react? Would he be horrified? Disgusted? Or would it not matter to him? Doesn’t really matter, he’ll never know, I’ll never tell anyone. Myrtle tries to help in her own way, and Ron helps as well, but it’s not the same. Myrtle’s a ghost (though she’s a great friend) and Ron’s marrying Hermione. Who would want me? Like this? Maybe he would. Maybe Professor Snape would want me, if he knew.

Sometimes he looks at me and I feel for sure he knows that I want him. I look around at all the people who praise me and it seems so hollow. Even Sirius and Remus. They try their best but it still feels false. He seems to be the only one who doesn’t give a damn about me being a saviour. Somehow, strangely, that makes me feel better. Normal. 

I look at him and it doesn’t bother me that other people say he’s ugly. Oh, he’s not handsome, but there is something. Besides, they say that a pretty face doesn’t stay that way for long. I keep thinking about that memory I saw, the one with the girl. He seemed so different in that one, so different with her. So tender. Sometimes I wish he was tender with me. I find myself having these dreams where he touches me, where I like it. I wake up and I wish that they were real. 

If anyone knew they’d probably think I was insane. But I know I’m not. I like him. I want him. And I wish he wanted me too.’

Severus read that one over and over, and when he next looked up he was startled to realise that it was three in the morning. He placed the book on the coffee table and prepared to put Solarin to her own bed instead of the couch before settling into his own bed. He had just stumbled to his cold feet when the flash of floo startled him, Solarin jerking awake.

Draco Malfoy emerged from his fireplace, a look of absolute horror on his face. Tears were falling down his godsons face as he dropped to his knees.

“Draco? Draco, what’s wrong?” Severus asked, kneeling before him and gently forcing the young mans gaze.

“I found him, uncle Severus. Oh gods, I’m going to be sick!” Draco cried and Solarin passed him the wastepaper basket. Draco heaved and heaved until there was nothing left in his stomach. Solarin vanished the vomit and passed him a glass of water.

“Draco, talk to me,” Severus urged, hardly daring to believe his hopes.

“Harry. I’ve found Harry. But I couldn’t go to Dumbledore, I didn‘t know who else to ask for help. He’s such a mess, uncle Severus. Dumbledore would send him to St Mungo’s and I don’t think Harry could take that.”

“Where is he, Draco? Where is Harry?”

“At the manor. He’s chained to the wall, I couldn’t get him loose. I need help. I promised him I’d be back, I swore I would, with help.”

Severus looked at Solarin and then Draco, formulating a plan. “Draco, I need to know, you have to tell me. Has your father touched Harry?”

“I watched it. Tonight, I watched it, watched him rape Harry,” Draco said, his voice betraying the fear of his father he felt at that moment.

“Solarin, I need you to ward this place with everything you’ve got. Once I have Harry, Lucius will come looking. We‘ll also need one of the spare rooms for him.” His sister nodded and he felt momentarily sorry for the man who married her. She could be downright terrifying when she wanted. “Draco, take me to Harry.”

Severus followed Draco through the floo, silently moving along the hidden passages and darkened hallways until Draco stopped before a door.

“In there,” Draco whispered. Severus entered, Draco keeping a watch for him outside. He felt his heart break as he spied Harry on the bed. 

“Oh God,” Severus breathed. He crossed to the bed, the young creature shying away from him. “Harry, it’s Professor Snape. I’m going to get you out of here.” Severus slipped the glasses gently onto the sunken face and began to work at the chains. Twenty three spells later, the heavy locks snapped and Harry’s hands were freed. 

“Harry, can you walk?” The starved figure shook his head. “Is it all right if I carry you?”

Harry nodded and Severus wrapped him in a robe he had transfigured from a handkerchief. As gently as he possibly could he cradled the impossibly light figure to his chest, hearing Harry whimper.

“Harry, I am so sorry but you are going to have to be silent. If he hears us he will keep you here and I won’t be able to get you out,” Severus whispered to him as he crossed to the door. Harry nodded.

“Where are we going? Not Hogwarts? Please, Professor, not Hogwarts,” Harry asked, terror filling his voice.

“We are going to my house. You’ll be safe there.”

“Please, help me,” Harry asked. 

Severus nodded. “Silence now, Harry.”

Harry was silent as Severus carried him through the manor, Draco close on their heels. With Harry disappearing so suddenly in the night Lucius would certainly know that Draco had helped in some way. Draco would need as much protection as Harry. The three of them tumbled through the floo and Severus saw the look in his sisters eyes as she looked at the figure in his arms. He knew that she was thinking of the damage their father had done to their mother, the damage that had caused her death and, quite honestly, Severus couldn’t say that Harry looked any better than their mother had. 

Solarin led Severus to the spare room next to his own, the room clean and fresh sheets on the bed. Solarin led Draco to the room across the hall next to hers and settled the blonde to sleep as her brother performed a miracle.

Severus lay the shaking young wizard on the bed, lighting the lamp on the bedside table. Solarin had brought in all the medicinal potions she could find. Severus perched on the bed beside the young creature.

“Harry?”

“Professor?”

“Harry, I know you’re tired and in pain but I need you to talk to me right now. I need you to tell me what you can about what Lucius did to you.”

“Why?” Harry rasped.

“Because I’m going to try and heal you as best I can. I need to know, Harry.”

“I don’t think I can.”

“Just tell me what you are able to.”

Harry nodded and Severus set to work.

“Harry, I need to remove the robe. I need to see you to help you.” Harry looked away in resignation as Severus removed the robe from his abused body.

Severus swallowed as he took in the damage. He started by resetting Harry’s broken jaw and healing his broken nose. He repaired the partially severed earlobes. Harry began to cry in embarrassment as Severus rubbed a healing salve into the infected bite marks on his shoulders and arms.

“I promise I will never tell anyone of what I see here tonight,” Severus said quietly. 

“Thank you, Professor,” Harry whispered.

“You may call me Severus, if you feel more comfortable.”

“Thank you, Severus.”

“Harry, if at any time while I heal you you wish to stop, tell me and I will do so. I will not force this upon you.”

Harry nodded and Severus returned to the broken body, reattaching Harry’s nipples, resetting broken ribs, healing bruised internal organs. Both of Harry’s wrists were snapped clean in two, and the wounds from the manacles were infected. Severus found Harry’s hips to be dislocated and he reset them, along with both of Harry’s shoulders. He continued along the pale skin, healing minor breaks in his legs and arms until he felt Harry tense.

He looked up into the dark gaze of his sister, standing in the doorway. “Should I call the Order, let them know he is safe?” she asked.

“No. Not yet. It can wait until the dawn. Harry needs us to help him now, not a load of frantic witches and wizards all clamouring around him, scaring him half to death. How is Draco?”

“Out cold. I gave him a sleeping draught.”

“Who is she, Severus?” Harry asked his professor, terrified of the new face but there was something soothing about her presence, something incredibly familiar about her.

“Harry, this is my little sister, Solarin. With your permission, I would like her help in healing you. Would you feel comfortable with that?”

Harry looked at the young woman and was surprised to see that she had the exact same eyes as her brother. “I suppose so.”

Solarin crossed the room at her brothers beckoning and helped him to sit Harry up, the young witch letting him lean against her as Severus poured some potions down his throat. The young being’s genitals had been covered at some point by Severus and Solarin felt sudden apprehension at what lay beneath the blanket. Lucius had never struck her as the most gentle of people. The one and only time she had glanced into his mind had left her in no doubt that he was dead inside, that he cared for nothing and no one but himself. She dreaded to think of what Lucius had done to this poor young soul. She held Harry as Severus leaned him forward to heal the infected wounds on his back, hearing him whimper in pain, before letting him rest against her once more, her hands laying gently on his shoulders.

“Harry, I need you to tell me some things, as best you can. I’m sorry to have to ask them but I really do need to know,” Severus asked as he waited for the potions to do their job inside the young body, sitting gently beside him but not touching him. Solarin let her own hands fall, following her brothers lead.

Harry nodded and Severus glanced at Solarin before he continued. He was counting on her to read Harry as they spoke. She nodded slightly and Severus looked at the dulled green eyes.

“Harry, was it only Lucius who touched you? Were there any others?”

“No. It was just him. He said something about me belonging to him, that he was my master, because he was the first to…to…”

“It’s all right, you don’t have to say it, I know. So it was just him. Harry, were you in that room the whole time? He never took you anywhere else?”

“No. Just that room. He kept me chained there.”

“The chains, did he ever take them off, maybe for the bathroom?”

“No. He got me a pan to use, for when I needed the bathroom.”

“When was the last time you ate?”

“I don’t remember.”

“All right, we’ll get you something soon, as soon as I’ve finished healing you. If you prefer, I can send for Madame Pomfrey for the rest of your injuries,” Severus suggested gently, seeing the young man back further into Solarin at the suggestion, her hands coming up to steady him, her touch light on the pale arms.

“No! No one else! Please! Just you! I can‘t, please! They can‘t know, they can‘t ever know! Please, Professor! Please!” Harry begged. Severus had always protected him, always treated him just like everyone else, he was the only one Harry trusted at the moment. He couldn’t even stand the thought of Madame Pomfrey seeing what Lucius had done to him, especially not the damage and deformities down below.

“All right, Harry, it’s all right! Just me then.” Severus paused. “Harry, I need to look at you down below.”

“No, you can’t. Please.” Tears of shame began to make their way down the sunken cheeks. Severus would be disgusted at what he saw, at what Harry was, he was sure of it.

“Harry, I already know what you are. I know that you are both male and female,” Severus confessed softly, seeing the accusing green gaze look at him. “Ronald Weasley came to me, he wasn’t sure if it would help us to find you or not. I was the only one he told, I have not told anyone other than Solarin of this.”

“Ron told you?” Harry asked, half betrayed at Ron, half relieved at finally having Severus know about him. He barely registered that Severus had told Solarin but it seemed quite logical that he would tell his only family of something like this. The two of them seemed close.

“Yes. We were trying to figure out why you may have been taken and Mr Weasley felt it would be wise to tell someone of your bleeding once a month. He was trying to help, Mr Potter. He never meant it as a way to betray your confidence.”

“Does anyone else know?”

“Draco may have seen some things when he found you, but apart from that, no one but Solarin and I.”

Harry nodded and took a few deep breaths. It really didn’t matter if Severus was disgusted by him now. If he wasn’t now he surely would be when he examined him down below.

“Harry, if you like we can leave the examination until the morning,” Severus suggested, hoping to ease the young creatures pain.

“No, it’s all right. Now’s fine. You will make it stop, right?” Harry asked, his eyes fixed on Severus’.

“Make what stop?”

“The pain. I’m in so much pain. And the baby…”

Severus looked at Harry in confusion. “Harry, I will stop the pain, I promise you. But I’m confused. What baby?” he said, looking at the flat stomach. Surely in such an emaciated frame, the child would be visible. There would be some sign of pregnancy.

“He told me I’m pregnant and I haven’t bled like usual since he took me. At least I don’t think I have. I haven’t had any cramps so I think I’ve missed them for the last few months.”

Severus pulled out his wand and ran it gently over the taught skin of Harry’s lower abdomen. His jaw dropped in shock when a floating bubble showed him that Harry was in fact pregnant. 

“Harry, when did he tell you that you were pregnant?”

“Three weeks after he took me. September first. He joked about my education.”

“Harry, that means that you are four, nearly five months pregnant.”

“Is it alive?”

“Yes, it is alive. It is tiny, extremely undersize. Probably from the starvation forced upon you. I fear the child is only sustaining itself on your magic. I am almost certain it will grow once you begin to eat again, regain your strength and put on some weight. It will be fine. It looks healthy, even though it is small.”

“Oh.”

Severus took one of Harry’s hands in his, feeling the sprite flinch and then grip his fingers slightly. “Harry, have you given thought to what you want to do about the child?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, it’s not too late for a termination if you don’t want it. Or there is adoption if you want. Or you could keep it. It is your choice and, no matter what you choose, no one will think any less of you,” Severus said gently.

“I don’t know.”

“All right, Harry. Have a think about it. There is no pressure.” Severus took a deep breath, calming his pounding heart and churning stomach. “Are you ready for me to examine you?”

Harry nodded and tensed as Severus lay him back down, his head in Solarin’s lap. Her pale fingers ran through Harry’s hair and he took comfort in the fact that she didn’t look at him with pity. She looked at him with kind eyes, and he had the impression that she had never said an unnecessarily harsh word in her life. He found himself focussing on the thin hoop in her nose as he was uncovered, wondering briefly what Severus made of the sliver of silver. He heard a gasp from Severus and half expected Solarin to look down but she didn’t. She kept her kind dark eyes fixed on Harry’s face and he found that somehow settling, that she was more focussed on him than his injuries. He reached up to grip her free hand as Severus’ fingers removed the tight thing around his penis and testicles, as they were released from their place against his stomach. Harry moaned in relief as Severus healed the wound he knew was on his manhood. So far so good. If only Harry could forget the last few horrific months it would be all good.

Severus fought the urge to floo to Malfoy manor and do some very painful things to Lucius. Harry’s testicles were both ruptured, damaged beyond being usable ever again. Severus worked for an hour alone on his balls, trying to save them. He managed to do it, though Harry would never father children he would still be able to keep them. He felt that it was somehow important to Harry to keep his male genitals as Harry had always identified as male. “Harry, you can choose what I see to next. Your back passage or your female genitals, it is your choice,” Severus asked gently. 

“Back.”

“All right, Harry. Roll onto your side for me.”

Harry rolled and buried his face in Solarin’s taut stomach, suddenly surrounded by the sweet comforting scent of her. She didn’t smell like potions like her brother. She smelled of cookies and flowers and snow storms and all the good things that Harry associated with being happy. He gripped at her as he felt Severus’ gentle slick fingers probing him, slipping into him. They paused as he tensed and together the siblings helped him to relax. He cried out in relief as Severus eased the hard moving thing out of him. Harry heard it hit the floor, felt the spell healing his damaged anus and felt the gentle hand of his Potions Master stroke his hip, urging him to roll onto his back when he was ready.

Severus looked down at the disgusting device that no longer moved as he cleaned his hands. To leave it in Harry was truly horrific, truly a sadistic act of madness. The Dark Lord had once filled Severus with one of the self fucking magical dildoes but he had removed it when he was done playing with him. Even the Dark Lord had not been that cruel. Severus tore his eyes away as Harry rolled onto his back once more.

“Let me know when you’re ready, Harry,” Severus whispered. Harry nodded his acceptance. “You need to spread your legs for me.”

Severus helped the lithe being spread his thin thighs, helped him to get as comfortable as possible. This was going to be bad enough without Harry tensing up. 

“I’m ready,” Harry said, his voice stronger than he felt. He felt Solarin grip his hands and heard her whispering soothing nonsense in his ear as Severus warmed his hands. 

“Try to relax. Tell me if you need me to stop,” Severus instructed, waiting for the nod of confirmation before moving his hands. He let a finger slip into the excruciatingly damaged passage. Harry was still incredibly tight, even after the months of rape. It was a wonder Harry had managed to make it this far without blacking out. He felt Harry’s breath hitch and he paused, looking up into the green eyes. Harry nodded and he continued. Severus pushed in a few millimetres more and withdrew his finger.

“Harry, did he put anything into you?” Severus asked softly, reaching for his wand. Harry nodded, his eyes willing Severus to understand. “Did he ever remove them?” Tears leaked from Harry’s eyes as he shook his head. Severus took a deep breath. Right now, he would happily face Azkaban if he was just allowed to kill Lucius, slowly and very, very painfully. “They are called Cervix Shields, Harry. They’re used to ensure conception of a child and to cause pain to a woman being raped by a Dark wizard. They use them on their captives. I am so very sorry but it is going to be incredibly painful for you if I remove them. I can give you a sleeping draught and do it while you sleep if you prefer.”

“No! No, please! He threatened to do that, to render me unconscious if I didn’t stop panicking.”

“All right, Harry. I won’t put you under. But you must understand that this is going to be very painful for you.”

“I understand. Just take them out, please.”

Severus nodded and glanced at his sister. He saw her hands tighten in Harry’s. “Harry, I need you to try and keep very still for me. If you move while I release the blades they will damage you further.” Harry took a deep breath and Severus inserted his wand into the tight passage, just far enough to touch the tip to the base of the lowest down of the devices, some inches in. He muttered the spell to release them and watched as Harry fought not to scream, not to move, as Solarin’s arms wrapped around him, his hands gripping at her. Severus placed his hands on the slim hips, holding them still. He saw the blood begin to trickle out of the opening. “Harry, push down for me. Push them out.”

Harry pushed down, feeling the hard things slide down, slide out. He gripped at Solarin as the pain continued to rule his thin body.

Severus saw three of them pushed out of Harry and felt disgusted. “I’m going to pull out the others for you, Harry. Hold on to Solarin,” Severus instructed, seeing the pained nod from Harry. He slid his fingers in and removed no less then five more of the appalling barbaric devices. He slid his fingers in once more, feeling all the way to Harry’s swollen cervix, making sure he had missed none. “It’s done, they’re out, Harry. It’s over, I’m done now.”

“Oh gods,” Harry moaned through his tears, still gripping Solarin.

“How about a healing bath, Sev? It might help,” Solarin suggested, looking up at her brother as he wiped his bloodied hands on a cloth, pushed a towel to Harry‘s genitals to mop up some of the blood. He nodded and she lay Harry on the bed, moving to the bathroom down the hall to fill the tub and add the necessary herbs to the warm water.

“Thank you,” Harry whispered.

“You’re very welcome. I just wish we could have found you sooner, saved you this pain,” Severus replied honestly, spelling away the blood and other bodily fluids from the sheets. “There is no spell that I know that can heal your female genitalia, Harry, but the bath will ease your pain, help speed your natural healing process.”

Harry nodded and lay there, staring out of the window at the rising sun. He was safe. He was safe.

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After the healing bath Severus dosed Harry with as many healing and painkilling potions as he felt were safe. He helped him to eat a shockingly small amount of food and then gulp down a nutrient potion. Severus administered Dreamless Sleep and then went in search of his sister. He had to know what she had heard and felt from Harry.

He found her standing in the overgrown back garden, staring out at the overcast sky. 

“That is a disgusting habit,” he said as he approached her, noticing the cigarette between her lips. “Why you insist on doing these things to yourself I will never understand.”

“Well, it’s my life and my choice. Do you want to reel off the things you don’t like about my life first or hear what I know from his head?” she answered, not looking at him. They had both known that this conversation was coming, both known it since he had come and found her on Christmas Eve.

“I think I want to reel.” She indicated for him to continue and he calculated his next words. He folded his arms and looked down at her, using his best scary professor glare. He knew he was taking his fear for Harry, his pain at the damage done, out on her but she really had asked for it with the cigarette. “Well, first off, you let some butcher put a hole in your nose, let some barbarian tattoo you. Your clothes are far too revealing, it makes you look too available to young men. And the make up! Why do you insist on looking like death? You’re a beautiful young woman, you don’t need it at all. That rat hole you insist on living in is completely unsuitable, you could catch anything, and the neighbourhood! I keep waiting for the day I get an owl post telling me that you’ve been molested or stabbed or something worse. I don’t like you up on that stage, being ogled by all those clearly unsuitable young men. And letting that guitarist grope you like that was behaviour completely unbecoming of a lady. And the cigarettes are a death wish.”

She smirked at him. “Are you done?”

“For the time being,” he grumbled, waiting for her reply. He knew his sister too well to expect she would take all of that without complaint.

“We go through this every time,” she muttered. “To begin with, I like my piercing and my tattoo. You have a tattoo, I don‘t berate you for it.”

“I gained mine through no choice of my own, as you well know.”

“You joined the death eaters so that Voldemort wouldn’t one day use me, I know that. I know you got yours keeping me safe. I understand that and I‘m grateful to you, I really am. I know you made a lot of sacrifices to raise me and to keep me safe. But I chose mine. I like it and it’s staying, it and the nose ring. My clothes and make up are also my choice. I like my clothes and happen to think that I look good in them. A vest top is not a whores wardrobe, Sevus. I am not too available to men, they’re too goddamned scared of me to even think about it. My flat is mine, I choose to live there, and I like it. It is perfectly clean, thank you very much! And we both know that I’m too scary a witch to have anything happen to me in that neighbourhood. I can take care of myself, you know that. I like singing, and being admired by all those men. They paid good money to see me perform, to hear my voice!”

“It wasn’t your voice they were ogling,” he interjected.

“They weren’t ogling, they were looking and entertaining their wildest dreams, because that is the only place that I will go anywhere near them. The guitarist wasn’t groping me, we were dancing. And the cigarettes are, as with everything else you don’t like about my life, my choice.” She sighed and ground the cigarette under her heel, turning to look at him. “Sevus, I know what you want from me, and I’ll tell you once again that it is not going to happen.”

“If you would just consider the idea. The Dark Lord is gone, you could return.”

“What, and have some other maniac try to use me to further themselves? Be registered by the Ministry again so they can try and find out how my gift works? I’m sorry, but I’m not returning to the Wizarding world. I like it in the Muggle world where no one knows that I’m special.”

“But you’re so far away,” he complained. He knew he was being petty, but she was all he had, he couldn’t help it.

“I know. Sevus, I know that if you could, you would wrap me up in cotton wool for the rest of my life. If I were to let you, you would happily lock me away forever, so no man could ever get near me, so no one could ever use me. But I’m not a little girl anymore. I don’t need you to protect me,” she said, holding him by the shoulders even though he turned his head away.

“I’m your big brother, worrying about you is what I do. I’m not ever going to stop. And I will always consider you in need of my protection,” he admitted, smoothing back a chunk of dark hair that had fallen into her eyes.

“I know, and I adore you for it. Sev, you know that you’re the best man in my life. There is never going to be another man ever that is as good as my big brother in my eyes. But I don’t need saving. Not anymore. We’re not kids hiding in the kitchen closet anymore. He’s not chasing me, drunk and angry. I don’t need saving. I’m already saved.”

“I know that. I know that he’s not chasing us anymore. But I still want to save you, and lock you up where I can always keep you safe from any harm. I’m not going to stop. Ever. Can’t you just let me worry and be overbearing in peace?”

She laughed. “I suppose.” She let him hug her, let him take comfort in the fact that she wasn’t three years old and running from their father anymore. Severus would always be her hero, and she knew that he knew that. For her, there would be no other man that could possibly enter her life that could ever be a greater man than her Sevus. But he could be so damn worried sometimes. She wished he knew how to relax, just a little bit.

“Do I get to criticise your life now?” she asked, still cradled against him.

“No. I am the big brother, you don’t get to criticise me,” he said childishly.

She laughed. “One day, you won’t be able to stop me. I’m going to go to town on your life.” She could feel the unease in him and she sighed. He was such an easy target to annoy.

They pulled back and moved to the kitchen, Severus pouring them both tea. “So, do you want to know what I got from Harry?” she asked as he placed the mug in front of her.

“Of course.”

She took a deep breath. “I don’t think he’ll ever fully heal from this. I know that it’s a prospect we don’t want to consider but a part of him will always be locked in that room with Lucius.” She looked at her brother, watched his face drop. “Physically, he’ll heal right?”

“Physically, I believe so. I don’t think ‘him’ is quite right though.”

“Harry has identified as male. Harry’s a him.”

“Good point. Continue.”

“Well, he’s terrified, but you didn’t need me to tell you that. Right now Harry only trusts you, only feels safe with you. You’re the only one who has treated him just like everyone else and he is clinging to that. He is so ashamed of what he is, Severus. He sees it as a deformity, as something wrong with him. He doesn’t understand that this does not make him ugly, that it makes him beautiful and rare. And what Lucius has done to him has just reinforced his ideas of being repulsive.”

“Can he be made to understand?”

“Yes, I think so. There is the potential there for acceptance of what he is. I think you were right though, when you told me not to call the Order. Harry just isn’t ready to see anyone yet. I think that if he were to suddenly be confronted by all the people who care for him he would shatter. If they all were to arrive and try to help they would damage him further. Maybe, in a few weeks or months, he will be ready. But not yet. To see them has to be something he asks for.”

“And the child he carries?”

“He’s confused. He’s always wanted children, a family of his own to care for. But it is Lucius’ child, a child Harry conceived through such horrific methods. I don’t think he quite knows yet how he feels.”

“Time is running short if he wants to terminate the pregnancy,” Severus offered. 

“Somewhere inside he knows that. But he’s not ready to make that decision.”

“Anything else I should know?”

“I know what you’re thinking. Harry has been so terribly treated that he’ll probably never let another touch him again.” She watched the pain of lost love flit across his face, though she knew he would never admit to it being love, not to her anyway. “Let me finish. I said I know what you’re thinking. But that is not how Harry feels.” He looked at her with sudden surprise. “I kept hearing the same thing over and over. ‘It can’t be like this, it must be better.’ Harry knows that sex isn’t supposed to be like that, that it isn’t supposed to involve pain and humiliation and degradation. He knows that sex is supposed to be good. Well, if it wasn’t why would Molly Weasley have had so many children? The point is that, at some point, I think Harry will ask to be shown how good it can be. I think he will ask you to show him.”

“Me? Why me?”

Solarin suddenly wished for a camera, the look of shock, disbelief and embarrassment on her big brothers face was priceless. She could make a mint with a picture of the fearsome Potions Master blushing. She managed not to smile at him, though how she had no idea.

“For the same reason that he tolerated me in that room with you. He trusts you implicitly, without question, trusts you to keep him safe, to only let people who won‘t hurt him near him. He questions how he knows it but he does know that he can trust you. For him, you are everything that is right in the world.” She smirked at the dumbfounded expression on his face. “Somewhere deep down, I mean really deep, he has feelings for you. And sooner or later he’ll work up the courage to act on them.”

“But he is so damaged, so destroyed. How on earth could he ever reach that point?” Severus asked in disbelief. Surely she was wrong. Harry would never want him, not now.

“Through your actions. This morning you waited for him to be ready before examining him and healing him, you were truthful about what you could and couldn‘t do for him. Over time, reveal things to him, be open and honest always with him. He will take courage from it.”

“I don’t think I’m a suitable caretaker for him. I don‘t think the Order will consider me suitable either.”

“Severus, of all the things I learned of Harry this morning the only thing that I am so sure of that I would bet my life on it is this. If Harry is forced to leave here, forced into the care of another, taken away from you, the only person he trusts right now, he will shatter, what little there is left of him will be destroyed, and he will let it. Harry must stay with you, he must, or you will all lose him.”

“All right, you have convinced me. But how do we convince the Order, his parents?”

“Leave it to me. You just concentrate on getting him better, physically. The rest will come. The two of you will work it out.”

Severus sat there in silence, turning over all the information in his head. There was no one on earth, in either Wizarding or Muggle world, that he trusted more than Solarin. She was his reason for fighting, the reason he had made so many decisions that had led to this point. When he had gained custody of her he had been determined to become someone she would be proud of, and in the process of becoming that man he had found it became his way of being. He had become a better man because of her, for her. And now she was guiding him again. He knew her experiences with her gift and their father had instilled a maturity in her that was virtually unheard of in someone as young. But they had helped form who she was. And Severus was eternally grateful for her presence in his life.

“Did you have a chance to read Draco?” he asked after a long time; both of their cups were empty.

“Not really, I got a brief glimpse. I don’t quite think he’s ready to talk or be read,” she admitted as she poured them more tea.

“Understandable. His parents never let him see the horrors the Dark Lord performed. He heard them, I know of that much, heard the screaming of agony and anguish of the Dark Lords victims. He has never seen something like what happened to Harry before. It must be hard for him to deal with.”

“He’s scared, I didn’t even need to read him to get that. What I did get, though, confused me, quite frankly.”

“How so?”

She leaned against the kitchen counter. “Well, he is confused by his experiences of his father and what he saw his father do, for him they are conflicting. He wants to stay here, at least he does right now. But it’s not that which confused me.”

“What then?”

“It was his white noise.”

“White noise?”

“In every mind that I’ve read, in every person I’ve read, there is always a background noise. I call it white noise. It’s in the background and never really serves a purpose. But Draco’s white noise was loud.”

“I’m trying not to sound like a first year Hufflepuff here but what do you mean, loud?”

She openly laughed at him. “Well, all other white noise I’ve ever heard is kind of like a hum in the background, something I can ignore. But when I went into Draco’s head it was deafening. It was like a buzzing, like a swarm of bees. It makes no sense what so ever, I’ve never come across anything like it. It was like there was a partition in his mind, and what ever is behind it there is no way I’m ever going to read.”

“You can’t get through it?”

“Not a chance.”

The two of them sat there contemplating what all these things meant and Severus couldn’t help but get the feeling that there was something important in it all, something he was missing.

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Sirius, Remus, Molly and Arthur sat around the kitchen table at Grimmauld Place and waited. Albus Dumbledore had sent them a message telling them to meet him here, that it was important. All of them felt that it must, surely, have something to do with Harry.

They were all silently praying that it wasn’t the news he was dead.

Albus flooed in with Solarin in tow. He chuckled at the sudden anger radiating from Sirius. The girl really did look far too much like her brother for Sirius to take her appearance in his kitchen well.

“Albus, what is going on? Who is she, why is she here?” Sirius asked, his temper rising. He knew those eyes. God, he hated those eyes.

“Sirius, this is Solarin Snape. She is here with information for us all on Harry. Please, remain calm and we will explain everything,” Albus said calmly, the two of them seating themselves at the table and given tea by Molly. He looked at Solarin and the girl nodded.

“Before I start I need to ask you to let me explain it all before you do anything. I will answer any questions you may have but you must listen,” she said and waited for all of the older wizards and witch to agree before she continued. “Harry was found this morning. For reasons I will explain it is not possible for any of you to see him yet. In time you will but right now he is not ready for it.”

“Where is he? Is he all right?” Sirius asked.

“He is in the care of Severus, he is in a bad way but he is alive,” she admitted.

“Why? What happened to him?” 

“You must understand that there are things I cannot tell you, I have been asked not to reveal certain things. Harry is…damaged,” she said delicately. The four of them looked at her confusedly, apprehension in their eyes. She took a deep breath. “Harry was… tampered with.”

No one needed her to elaborate or explain, the simple statement said it all. Molly and Remus let their respective husbands pull them close as they recoiled in horror. 

“How is he?” Remus whispered.

“Terrified. He is very weak, and in a lot of pain. He will recover. Molly, Severus asked me if you would put together some things that Harry likes to eat.”

“Of course, but I’m sure Severus is a very good cook,” Molly questioned.

“Harry has been starved. We think it might be easier to help him start eating again if he is offered things he likes, things he knows. He is very thin.”

“I want to see him,” Sirius demanded. “He’s my godson, you’re not keeping me from him.”

“No one is denying you access to him, Sirius. All we need you to do is to wait until Harry is ready to let people near him.”

“What do you mean?”

“Harry has been put through hell. He has been humiliated, suffered shame, beyond anything any of us could ever imagine. He was violated in the most horrific ways imaginable, and then some. All of his privacy, self respect, even basic human decency has been taken from him. If you force him to see you, see anyone, before he is ready you will cause more damage. You will lose him. I understand that you care for him and want to help him, but you must wait. Please, Sirius? It really is for the best. As soon as he asks for you, you can see him,” she explained.

“As soon as he asks?”

“The very moment he asks you will be called, day or night.”

Sirius nodded and let her continue to answer their questions as his mind conjured up horrific images of what had befallen his godson.

“Who did this to him?” Remus asked.

“Lucius Malfoy. But you must understand that we cannot have him arrested. The law condones what he has done. Besides, if we were to launch a vendetta against Lucius we would expose Harry.”

“What do you mean we can’t have him punished! That is the most disgusting thing I have ever heard! He has done this heinous thing to Harry and we just sit here and do nothing!” Arthur exploded.

“Arthur! Please, calm down and I will explain!” She waited until Arthur was slightly calmer before continuing. “No one outside of this room can ever know of what I tell you now. It must be your most closely guarded secret. To reveal it would be to endanger Harry, do you all understand me?” They all nodded. “Harry is not a him. Harry is a hermaphrodite.” They all gaped at her. “According to the law, Lucius, as the wizard who has taken his maidenhead, owns Harry. We cannot have him arrested. According to the law, Lucius has acted well within his legal standing. There is nothing we can do but to keep Harry hidden.” She watched their mouths drop open in shock and decided to cut them to the quick. “Listen to me, Harry has guarded this secret with his life. If anyone were to find out he would not only be endangered but also mortified. He cannot know that you know about him, and neither can anyone else. You can tell no one in the Order, no one in your families, no one, and he cannot know that I have told you. You must wait for him to give the go ahead for you to know before you reveal what I have said.”

“We understand,” Sirius said. Dear Merlin, how the hell did he not know? Why didn’t Lily or James tell him?”

“Sirius, you were closer to Lily and James than anyone else. Did you know of Harry? Did they tell you?” Sirius shook his head. “Well then, it looks like they didn’t tell anyone. They didn’t tell me,” Dumbledore said. 

“There is one more thing I need from you,” Solarin said.

“Anything. Name it,” Remus said.

“Some of Harry’s clothes. Some of his things, to make him feel more comfortable. And some things that would fit Draco Malfoy.” They looked at her in confusion. “Draco is the one that found Harry. He is the one that came to my brother and I and told us where he was, allowing Severus to rescue Harry. Draco cannot return home, Lucius must know it is him who helped release Harry. If Draco is found by Lucius, he will kill him. Unfortunately, we have no clothes for Draco. He is stuck in his pyjamas.”

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Solarin leant against the kitchen counter with a mug of tea and surveyed the chaos of Molly Weasley that had overtaken the impressive kitchen. Remus had decided that it would be him who would collect the things for Harry and Draco, so he had disappeared somewhere upstairs; Albus had drawn Arthur aside, talking to him quietly in the hopes that Arthur could use his contacts at the Ministry to both run interference in the Auror’s search for Harry and find out information on the laws surrounding a being like Harry; Molly was cooking up a storm and Solarin had no doubt that Harry would never run out of food for the rest of his life if she kept going like this, thank Merlin for preservative charms. But by far the most interesting sight in the room was Sirius.

The Animagus was sitting at the table nursing a mug of tea laced liberally with Firewhisky and staring at her over the rim. His eyes held something she had seen too many times before and something she didn’t like a single bit. She saw the calculating glint in his eyes, something she was all too used to when she encountered a new magical acquaintance. She had been getting those looks since school and it no longer bothered her the way it used to. But the other look, the one she saw in her nightmares, was the one that made her feel cold. She felt the smell of alcohol catch in the back of her throat and suppressed the rising nausea.

“Must you drink that?” she enquired. His eyebrow arched in sudden surprise. He smirked.

“Tea bothers you?” he replied.

“No, alcohol does.”

“Tough. My house.”

Sirius quickly learned that she took a challenge about as well as her brother did. She pushed off of the counter she had been leaning against and strode over to him quickly, snatching the mug from his hands and dumping its contents down the sink. He pulled his wand on her, only to find she already had her own pressed against his throat. Albus and Arthur looked at them curiously. They were used to Sirius having an increasingly short temper since Harry’s disappearance and were not surprised to see a Black and a Snape at each others throats once again.

“I wouldn’t if I were you,” she warned. 

“And what makes you think you’re good enough to beat me, little girl?” Sirius challenged as Remus slipped into the kitchen.

The next thing Sirius knew he was on his knees, blood pouring from his nose, his eyes, his mouth. His skull felt as if it were about to crack open and she was looking down on him in disgust.

“SOLARIN! Stop! You will kill him!”

The pressure was gone, the pain over. Sirius knelt on the floor, cradled by Remus as Albus pulled the young witch away. Arthur stood between the two, trying to figure out what the hell had just happened.

Sirius let Remus help him to his feet, let his husband try and mop up the blood. “What the fuck was that?” Sirius asked, fear filling him. Her wand lay forgotten on the floor. “Some disgusting Dark Art Snivellus taught you?”

Albus had to physically restrain her and force her to look away.

“Sirius, stop goading her,” Remus warned. “Just stop being such an insufferable prat.”

“Me? She did this to me and I’m being a prat?” Sirius asked, turning on his husband.

“Yes. What did you do?”

“Nothing!”

“Albus, maybe the two of you should leave,” Molly suggested, the witch clutching at the table in fright.

“No,” Albus said firmly. “Solarin and I will explain. Solarin, you will control yourself. Sirius, you will keep your temper in check and your thoughts to yourself.”

“I didn’t say anything that bad!” Sirius protested.

“But you thought it!” Solarin screamed. “How could you do that to Severus? You foul loathsome Pureblooded bastard!”

“What the hell is going on here?” Arthur asked. “What is she, Albus? She is no normal witch.”

“Sit and we shall explain.”

The four wizards and two witches sat at the table. Solarin had an end of it all to herself, Albus seated close enough to run intervention.

“Solarin, are you going to tell them or am I?” Albus asked gently.

“Who cares?” she replied. 

Ah. How helpful. Albus recognised these moods in her, he had witnessed enough of them to know that they would burn themselves out. In time.

“Very well, I shall do it.” Albus took a deep breath. “Solarin is an augur.”

“A what?” Sirius asked.

“See? What’s the point in trying to explain to him? He’s so god damned narrow minded that it just won’t get through! He doesn’t even know what the bloody word means!” Solarin said, jumping to her feet.

“Sit down, Sol. Now,” Albus ordered. She gave him an angry little glare but did as she was told. “Remus, you were a Defence teacher. Care to explain what an augur is?”

Remus nodded and appeared to be searching his memory for a moment before speaking. “In history, an augur was a religious official in ancient Rome who interpreted natural phenomena, such as the flight of birds, as signs that the deities favoured or disapproved of actions proposed by the city. In more simple and modern terms an augur is any soothsayer, prophet, or diviner. In the Wizarding world it is taken to mean any being who has been granted the ability to read minds, a natural Legilimens. The only danger is that when an augur enters your mind they do it painlessly, without your knowledge. They can also have the ability to predict certain aspects of the future, though that is usually a latent power, rarely developed or used. They possess a great deal of power. They are monitored and controlled very closely by the Ministry, more specifically, the Department of Mysteries.”

“At least one of you has a brain. At least one of you knows how to pick up a book,” Solarin commented. Remus smirked in spite of himself at her betrayal of her own youth.

“So why isn’t that little health hazard locked up in a Ministry cell somewhere?” Sirius spat spitefully. Remus was relieved to see Solarin shy away from the question and not attack his husband again for it.

“You live in the Muggle world. The Ministry has no jurisdiction over you if you left willingly. In fact, they cannot touch an augur unless the augur consents to it. You would have to hand yourself over to the Ministry willingly,” Remus said, taking in the Muggle clothing.

“Then why don’t you?” Sirius said, some of his anger abating.

“I did once. It didn’t take,” Solarin said calmly, her tone leaving no space for questioning.

“Why did you do…. What was it you did to me back there?”

“I lost my temper.”

“Why?”

“Severus told me once that one of his classmates found it funny to feed him to a werewolf. He never told me who it was. When you looked at me that memory popped into your head.”

“You had no right to go into my mind!”

She looked at him coldly and he felt fear flood him again. “Do you think for one single second that I delight in this? That I chose for an instant to enter that flea infested perverted mind of yours? I slipped. Your thoughts were too loud, I couldn’t block them. Believe me, it won’t ever happen again.”

“Damn straight. I’m going to find a spell to keep you out.”

“You can try. Many have. Severus, Albus, Mad-Eye. At one point most of the Department of Mysteries was trying to find one. They never did. There is no spell to stop what I can do.” She sighed and Sirius was suddenly struck by how very young she looked. “Remus, where did you put the things for Harry and Draco?”

“In the living room.”

“I’ll go pack them up.”

She left the room and the older wizards and witch sat in silence for a moment. 

“Why did she leave our world, Albus?” Remus asked.

“I do not actually know. She may have told Severus but I cannot be certain of that.”

“Who cares?” Sirius said bitterly. “So she’s an aggy thingy. So what?”

“So, she is the reason that Severus became a Death Eater,” Albus replied. They all gaped at him in shock. “Severus made a deal with the Dark Lord. He would become a Death Eater, he would do as he was told, basically selling himself into slavery, if Voldemort never went near her. Severus has a brilliant mind, and is a very capable wizard. He was very tempting to Voldemort. Severus joined Voldemort to keep him away from Solarin.”

“So she’s a weakness in him. Again, who cares? I don’t want her near my godson, Albus,” Sirius demanded.

“You do not have a say.” Albus held up his hand as Sirius began to protest. “It is Harry’s choice. He has chosen, for the time being at least, to stay with Severus. Whether Solarin intends to stay with them or not has not been made clear to me yet. Personally, I believe that she will return to the Muggle world very soon.”

“Why does she live there?” Remus asked, interrupting Sirius’ next protest.

“I have never asked.”

“Snape is not fit to care for Harry,” Sirius blasted. “That slimy bastard will do more harm than Malfoy ever did. Harry needs to be with his family, with us, his place is here. Snape is a low down dirty Death Eater. Harry is probably defenceless right now, Snape will use him to practice some disgusting dark curse.”

“That is not your call.” They looked up to see Solarin standing in the doorway, her arms loaded with the things Remus had prepared for her to take with her. Sirius had the audacity to look at her accusingly. “Harry is perfectly safe where he is.”

“And why should I trust anything you say?”

She shrugged her thin shoulders. “Fine, don’t trust me. After all, who am I to tell you all of this? Why should you trust me to tell you the truth, why should you trust Severus to put Harry back together again?”

Sirius glowered at her. Remus laid a cautionary hand on his arm. “Leave it be, Siri.”

Sirius glared at his husband. “No, I won’t. I want our son home. Now.”

Solarin placed the pile in front of Albus so he could pack them neatly for her and faced Sirius. “Harry doesn’t want you near him.”

“What the fuck are you on about? We’re his adoptive parents, the men who are raising him. He loves us.”

“Are you sure you want to know this?” she sighed, her hands on her hips.

“Yes.”

“Very well. Harry is ashamed, both of what he is and what has been done to him. He views himself as some kind of freak, some kind of deformity. In his mind, you represent his old life, all of you do. You represent the life he had before, before the abduction, before the implications of what he is became clear to him. In his mind, this wouldn’t have happened to him if he wasn’t so disgusting. He doesn’t yet understand that he is something beautiful and rare. If he were to be ripped away from Severus, what little there is left of the Harry you knew will break, you will lose him.”

“Why Severus?” Arthur asked. “Why is Severus the one he trusts?”

“Because, for Harry, Severus represents normalcy. Severus, unlike everyone else in his life, has always treated him in exactly the same way as he would any other student. Severus has never endorsed his celebrity, never made exceptions for him. If anything, Severus has been harder on him than any other, given Harry the grounding that he needed. Severus was so harsh on Harry because no one else was, he needed to make up for all the allowances everyone else made.”

“I don’t understand,” Remus said.

“Remus, when you were Harry’s teacher, you treated him with certain privileges that you didn’t give to other students. Minerva McGonagall, Lockhart, Flitwick, even Albus. All of you allowed him to skip classes, to miss homework, to break school rules. Severus was overly harsh on him, was hard to the point of ridiculousness. Harry is clinging to that. He doesn’t want to be different, he wants to be like every other sixteen year old boy.”

They were all silent, lost in their own thoughts. “It’s not that Harry doesn’t care for you two. He does, more than anyone else. He’s just not ready to admit that he’s different. That is what I meant when I said Harry isn’t ready to see you yet.”

“How do you know all of this?” Remus asked.

“When Severus was healing Harry he asked me to read him, to see what I could find out of Harry’s mental and emotional health. Remus, you haven’t included Harry’s wand.”

Remus reached into his own pocket and handed over the holly wand. 

“Albus, we should be leaving,” Solarin said, picking up the two large packages, one of belongings, the other of food. Obviously her tolerance for the situation had ended and Albus looked at them regretfully before he followed her out of the floo.

Sirius watched the two of them leave, watched Molly and Arthur take their leave soon after. He knew he had to let Snape handle this, that he had to take a back seat if he ever wanted Harry to heal. 

It didn’t mean he had to like it.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Harry awoke in a panic, thinking that he had dreamed of his salvation. He cracked open his eyes to realise that he was warm and comfortable in a large bed. His hands were unchained and he was clothed in a thick soft flannel nightshirt. He sat up gingerly and slipped on his glasses, looking around. The room was dark, indicating night, but someone had left the light in the hall on. The door was open, giving Harry the chance to examine the small room. To his shock, he saw his own things scattered around the room. His books, his pictures. Where had they come from?

The room on a whole was small and cluttered but in a comfortable sort of way. It was clean and someone had left a vase of winter flowers on a dresser under the window. He eased himself out of bed and padded to the window, leaning on the dresser for support and looking out into the dark street below. By the street lamp outside shining dimly orange Harry understood that he was in the Muggle world. It looked like a rather run down area, and Harry could make out a sort of dirty stream, maybe a river, littered with rubbish. He opened the dresser and pulled out some of the clothes he found, realising that they were his own as well, before making his way shakily from the room.

The house was still and calm. Harry supposed that everyone else who might be here was asleep. He closed himself in the bathroom and started off the shower. He caught his reflection in the chipped mirror above the sink as he turned to undress. Merlin, he looked like death. Scarily pale, his eyes had gone from startling to disconcerting. He felt his throat close slightly at the lack of light in them. To him, his eyes looked empty and lost. He turned away and dropped the soft flannel nightshirt, gently moving his sore body into the hot water. He knew that the woman, whatever her name was, had helped Severus bathe him before he fell asleep but it wasn’t enough. Harry grabbed at the soap and began to roughly scrub at his skin, only easing his treatment when he dipped his hand between his legs. It was no longer a pain that threatened to render him unconscious, but it was enough for him to hiss in pain as his fingers moved, gritting his teeth and pushing his head against his other arm, which was supporting him against the tiled wall.

His whole body ached, some areas still acutely painful when the soap slid over them. His chest was particularly sensitive and the bruises that covered his skin had not faded. His fingers began to shake as he passed the bar over his abused genitals, a few tears of agony washed away by the stream of steaming water. He looked down to see his own blood slipping down the drain. 

Disgust. He was sure he had seen it flit across his professors face last night. Or was it this morning? No matter when it was, it had still been there, he was sure he‘d seen it. How stupid he had been. As if even Severus could accept what he was. No one would. Maybe all he was good for was to be used, like Lucius had done.

Harry was startled out of his own mental berating by a gentle knock on the dark wood of the closed door. “Harry?”

Severus. Probably coming to see if he was topping himself in the mans bathroom.

“Harry, are you all right?”

The man sounded genuinely concerned and Harry felt shame swell inside him. Even the usually acidic Potions Master felt sorry for him.

“Harry?”

Harry felt his eyes sting with tears. Why was the man being so nice? Harry didn’t deserve it. He was just a freak, like his aunt had said, just a disgusting deformity, like he had convinced himself, just a whore, like Lucius had called him in that room. He let out a choked sob. Who would ever want him again, in any way? Severus must have let it slip somewhere, or at least he would sometime in the future. Not even Sirius and Remus would want him then, not once they knew. Harry couldn’t blame them. Who would want some hideous misconstruction of nature? He let the soap fall and sank to his knees, letting his shame and repulsion at himself take over, letting himself fall into self-hatred.

Suddenly, the water stopped and a warm soft towel was wrapped around him. Harry fought against the strong arms, his eyes closed through the burning tears.

“Harry! It’s all right, it’s just me!”

He blinked up at his professor, looking at him with worry and compassion and something else Harry couldn’t quite make out.

“Please, just go away,” Harry begged. “Please.”

“No.” Harry glared at him. “Not until you talk to me.”

“I don’t want to talk.”

“I know that. I know that you want to shut yourself away and slip away into oblivion. But I will not let you do that. You may hate me, if you so desire, but I will not let you waste away.”

“Why? Why do you care? I’m not worth it. I’m not worth the effort.”

Severus lifted him easily, placing him gently on the counter that housed the sink. Severus grabbed a smaller towel and began to tenderly dry the dark unruly hair. 

“Harry, you are worth the effort. You are worth it,” Severus argued vehemently as he wiped away a few tears from the young beings face.

“No I’m not.”

Severus sighed. “You’re stubborn, I’ll give you that,” he joked. Harry didn’t smile. “Harry, tell me what is going on in your head. If you don’t tell me, I can’t help.”

“You can’t help.”

“Not if you don’t tell me.”

Harry looked down at the faded linoleum on the floor, noticing the bare feet of his professor. He glanced up at the black pyjamas before letting his gaze drop again. He must have just gotten out of bed. He couldn’t tell him, not that he didn’t have the nagging voice in his head telling him to spill it all. He couldn’t. He couldn’t find the words, they just kept getting lodged in his throat.

“What time is it?” Harry asked, trying to compose himself.

“A little after five,” Severus replied, letting the subject drop. For now.

“How long did I sleep?”

“A full 24 hours.” Severus handed Harry his clothes and softly helped him to dress, all in complete silence. Severus briefly noticed that Harry had no body hair, nothing but a light scattering on his thighs and between them. Severus was waiting for Harry to speak, waiting for some sign of how to proceed. Solarin may have had faith that Harry would heal, that Harry trusted Severus but he himself had his doubts. Things went smoothly until Harry began to fight against him. Severus looked up in alarm as Harry’s hands began to push against him, a look of desperation on the thin face. Severus looked down at the black boxers he had been trying to help Harry into.

“Am I hurting you?” Severus asked in confusion. 

“No.”

“Then what is it? Would you rather I left you to dress alone?”

“I can’t,” Harry admitted brokenly. 

“Harry, you must explain. I don’t understand.”

The sprite took a deep breath and looked anywhere but at his teacher. “I don’t want you to see.”

“See what?” Severus asked, his confusion growing by the second. He had already seen it all.

“See…that.”

“Harry, I’m not looking. I’m simply pulling them up for you.”

“But you’ll see! You’ll see again and…and…you…”

Severus could see Harry getting more and more worked up. He straightened, looking at Harry’s face and pulling the boxers with him. Those startling green eyes fixed on Severus’ black ones and Harry held his breath until the waistband was against his skin.

“You believe I will be horrified at what I see?” Severus asked kindly and felt relief at Harry’s somewhat hesitant nod. At least this first hurdle he knew how to handle.

Solarin squirmed in his arms. She was barely four years old, far too young to be able to dress unaided. 

“Let go, Sevus! Let go!” she screamed at him and he relinquished his hold in surprise at the panic in her voice. He watched as she stomped to the other side of the room and stood shaking, wrapping her towel closer around herself. 

“Sol? Sol, sweetheart, what’s wrong?”

“You can’t! No looking!”

“Sol, you can’t do this by yourself,” he argued reasonably.

“Want mummy do it,” she grumbled, her dark eyes wide and glistening with unshed tears, her hair still dripping.

Severus sighed. Only two days had passed since Severus had gained custody of Solarin, it was bound to be trying. How he wished his mothers body had not given out. She should be here with them, away from him. She should be the one giving Solarin her bath. Of course, he should have anticipated Solarin being difficult the day after the funeral.

“Sol, mum can’t do it. You know that. Mum had to go away, she went to be with the angels. You have to let me do it,” he explained, growling in frustration as she shook her head and ran out of the bathroom. He got to his feet and went on search of her.

He found her in the small bedroom they were both sharing for the time being. With his limited funds the tiny bed-sit type flat was all they could afford. She was trying to wrestle on her pyjamas without success, only succeeding in tangling herself up in the blue fabric and falling on her face. Severus crossed the room and bent to pick her up.

“Sol, is this about the bruises?” Severus asked at the sight of the dark, vicious looking bruises on her impossibly young skin. She nodded at him as he wrapped her towel around her again. “Sol, it doesn’t matter. You’re still my beautiful baby sister. Bruises don’t matter.”

“But it was my fault, daddy said so.”

Severus felt anger spark inside him. “Daddy was wrong. Even grown ups can be wrong and he was wrong this time. The bruises are not your fault. And they don’t matter to me.”

It was a quiet evening after that. Solarin let Severus wriggle her into the pyjamas, let him brush her hair and tuck her into bed. Solarin told him that night that he was her Superman.

“Harry, you do not disgust me.”

“Please don’t lie for my benefit,” Harry whispered.

“I am not lying.” Severus forced Harry to look at him. “Harry, have I ever lied to you when it was important?” He shook his head. “Why would I start now? Harry, while you are here I will never lie to you. I will always tell you the truth. I’m starting right now. I do not find you disgusting, repulsive, repugnant or any other adjective that amounts to me turning away in horror.”

“You don’t?” Harry asked in disbelief. It had to be a dream, it just had to.

“No.”

“Why?”

“Harry, a hermaphrodite is what you are, what you have always been. It is as much a part of you as your black hair and your green eyes.”

“But it’s disgusting,” Harry whispered.

“No more disgusting than my penis.”

In spite of himself Harry snorted in amusement.

“When you really think about it, no genitalia can be considered beautiful,” Severus said with a slight smile. “Yours is no more disgusting than anyone else’s. Yours is just different.”

Harry looked thoughtful. “I never really thought of it like that.” Harry allowed Severus to help him into sweatpants and socks before he attempted to stand on his own.

Severus helped the shaky teen to his feet, stepping away to hang up the damp towels. He looked up in alarm as Harry threw himself at the toilet, retching for all he was worth. Severus rubbed soothing circles on the thin back while Harry emptied his stomach.

“Oh God,” Harry moaned. “What the hell is happening?” Harry asked as he panted.

“Morning sickness. Perfectly normal.”

“Hardly,” Harry managed to croak before it overtook him once more. Finally, it seemed to pass and he pulled back, rinsing his mouth with the water Severus handed to him. The taller man helped him to his feet and guided him to the sink. To his surprise, his own toiletries occupied some of the limited space.

“Where did my stuff come from?” Harry queried as Severus handed him his toothbrush.

“I sent my sister to gather some of your things. She also informed certain people of your safe return while she was there. Molly Weasley was kind enough to cook up some things for you also,” Severus replied carefully as he began to shave.

Harry brushed his teeth in silence, his mind churning along with his stomach. Why had she told them? What had she told them? Did they know what he was, what Lucius had done? Why hadn’t they burst in and snatched him from Severus’ grasp? He rinsed his mouth and sat down on the closed lid of the toilet, his chin in his hands.

Severus took his time shaving and making use of his own toothbrush, hoping to prolong the inevitable outburst from the youth. Harry had a history of losing control of his tongue while around Severus and he was already preparing to keep his own acidic tongue under control while Harry was in his care. Severus quit the bathroom and returned to his own room to dress quickly before moving to collect Harry. The lithe being had not moved from his position.

“We should eat something. Would you like to eat in the kitchen?” Severus asked quietly.

“Kitchen’s fine.”

Harry found that he had to allow Severus to help him down the narrow hallway. Severus left him propped up against the doorframe as he entered another bedroom, the one directly across from Harry’s own. He glanced in and saw Severus straightening the covers Draco had managed to throw off. ‘Of course,’ Harry thought, feeling guilty. ‘Lucius will know he helped me.’

Severus then led Harry to the doorway of the room next to Draco’s. The young woman from yesterday was asleep in here, and Harry watched as Severus straightened the covers and smoothed back her sleep-tangled black hair. He noticed that she and Severus didn’t share the same hooked nose and her features were softer than the mans. He watched Severus drop a light kiss on her forehead, the woman mumbling something about ‘being a big girl now’, before Severus led him gently down the stairs. 

They entered what he assumed to be the living room through a hidden door behind a bookcase. In fact, the walls of the whole room were lined with shelves filled with books. The sofa and arm chair looked warm and cosy, if a little battered, and the room was littered with loose pages of scribbled handwriting. The front door was right next to the fireplace. He was led through another hidden door into a light and airy kitchen. The sudden change of feeling in the two rooms was a bit of a shock to the system. This room was a light yellow, the early mornings winter sun filtering in through a small window beyond which Harry could see a slightly overgrown garden. Severus sat him at a moderate sized oak table and moved to the Muggle refrigerator.

“What would you like?” Severus asked.

“Not sure what my stomach can handle right now,” Harry replied truthfully, his stomach rolling again.

“How about some toast?”

“No! No toast! Not now, not ever!”

Harry couldn’t breathe, couldn’t see, couldn’t move. He was suddenly back there, chained to that room with Lucius feeding him toast….covering him….stripping….threats ….pain…screaming…

Severus was at his side in an instant, kneeling down and forcing the sprite to look him in the eye. “Breathe with me, Harry. Come on, just breathe. In and out, slow and steady. Slowly. It’s all right, Harry. You’re here, in my house. You’re not there anymore, you’re here, you’re safe. You’re safe with me.” 

Harry began to take slow shaky breaths, his white hands gripping at Severus. He toppled off of the chair and into the strong arms, clinging to them as if his life depended on it. Severus would keep him safe. He said he would never lie, he would keep him safe.

Severus held the young man to him, his back against his chest, wrapping his arms around the thin figure. He took long slow breaths, forcing Harry to copy him. He let the wasted fingers grip at him, let Harry anchor himself.

“I’m sorry, Severus. I didn’t mean to panic,” Harry admitted a few minutes later.

“It’s quite all right. Would you like to talk about it?”

“He…toast is…” Harry stumbled.

“It’s all right, take your time.”

“He gave me toast, that day. The day he grabbed me…before he…he…”

“I see. No toast.”

Severus helped Harry back to his seat and then moved to the cupboards and fridge to see what Molly had sent. He needed something light, something that would be easy on Harry’s delicate stomach. He opened one cupboard to find a garish Muggle box.

“These must be Solarin’s, Merlin knows they‘re definitely not mine. Corn Flakes?” Severus said uncertainly. He examined some of the other long thin boxes. “There are also Wheat-a-bix, Rice Crispies and something called Cocoa Pops.”

“Corn Flakes are fine. Thank you. Are you sure she won’t mind?”

“Not in the slightest. Might force her to actually eat some herself if she thinks someone else might finish them off,” Severus remarked with distain as he fixed a bowl.

Harry smirked. He ate slowly in silence as Severus busied himself with letting in a postal owl with a copy of the Daily Prophet and making himself some tea. 

“Oh sweet Merlin, it’s too bloody bright in here.”

Severus smirked as Solarin padded into the kitchen and plonked herself down at the table, holding her head and shielding her eyes. “You shouldn’t have drunk so much,” he commented lightly, his voice filled with amusement, catching Harry‘s curious looks at his sister. ‘This must be strange for him, meeting her,’ Severus thought to himself.

“Oh, go boil your head,” she spat.

“Now now, be nice,” he scolded, seeing Harry’s lips twitch.

“Sod nice. And sod you. ‘Be nice’. Like anyone could be nice feeling like this.”

“You know where the hangover potions are.”

“I don’t have a hangover. I just feel a little ill this morning,” she said defensively, moving slowly to one of the cupboards and grabbing a green potion, chucking it down.

“I believe you. Millions wouldn’t,” Severus smirked as he handed her a cup of coffee, letting her lean in for a hug and groan into his chest, watching Harry‘s slightly raised eyebrows before he returned to his cereal. It looked like Harry was doing his best with it but he had barely managed half a dozen bites and was looking full already.

“Come on, it was a party, Sev. I’m allowed to go to a party. It was New Years. There were a lot of minds there, I couldn’t help myself. Their drunken thoughts were funny. And yes, I know I get a hangover from doing that, don’t gloat,” she said as she added sugar to her coffee, returning to her seat as she stirred. 

“New Years?” Harry asked quietly.

“Yes. It is the first of January and someone, what is the phrase? Ah yes, ‘partied like a rock star’ last night,” Severus answered. He chuckled as she glared at him.

“I was taken on August third. Have I really been gone nearly five months?”

“Yes, but you‘re safe now.” Severus looked suddenly uncomfortable. “Harry…I know that you haven’t really had a chance to think about it but time is running short if you wish to terminate the pregnancy. If you wish to terminate, it has to be done soon,” he said delicately.

Oh God, the baby. How could Harry have forgotten? He sat and pondered, the rest of his uneaten cereal suddenly forgotten. Did he want the baby? He honestly didn’t know. He had always wanted a family, though he had considered it a moot point with his…condition. Part of him wanted it, wanted to go through with it. But there was that other part, that more logical side of his brain. He was only sixteen, he was still at school. Oh, school. He’d missed half the year already. If he had the baby, he’d never be able to study for his N.E.W.T.’s. But a family of his own. A child, someone of his own to care for, someone to give all the attention a child deserved. 

A child of Lucius Malfoy’s.

How could he do this, have the child of that man? Even if he wanted a child, would he ever be able to look at the child and not see the man who had held him captive? The man who caused him so much pain? The man who now owned him?

And what about Sirius and Remus? What would they say? And the Weasley’s? Oh God. His head started to spin with all the possibilities, all the reactions, all the issues. In the end, his mind boiled it down to one single question.

Could he stand going through an abortion?

He remembered overhearing Aunt Petunia describe the procedure to a friend of hers who had ‘gotten herself in trouble’. The thought of someone between his legs, doing something to him, something on the inside. He swallowed against the sudden nausea.

“I can’t,” he whispered.

“Can’t what, Harry?” Severus questioned, sitting down opposite him.

“I can’t go through with an abortion. I don’t know if I want the baby, but I know I can’t go through…that.”

Severus took a deep breath. He could understand Harry’s resistance. It was an invasive procedure, one that could have a huge emotional and psychological ramification, especially for someone like Harry. “Well, in that case, you don’t have to decide if you want it or not. You’re not due until May, so you have time to make up your mind.”

“What if I don’t want it once it’s born?”

“There are options. You could consider adoption. There may also be the option of Molly Weasley or another Wizarding family taking in the child until you feel more ready to deal with the situation.”

“Oh.”

“There are options open to you.”

Harry nodded. Right now, he just wanted to run far far away. So he did just that. He slowly left the room, heading up to his bedroom where he lay on his bed, staring out of the window, letting his mind go blank.

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“You’re being too soft with him, Sev,” Solarin said firmly, ignoring his start at a protest. “You need to be the same way with him as you always have, strict. Right now, you’re confusing him. He needs structure, stability.”

“And what do you propose I do? I mentioned the word toast and he dissolved!” Severus seethed. She was right and he knew it. And he hated that she was right.

“You go up there and you lay down the house rules to him!”

“What?”

“You go up there and be the professor you are! You go up there and lay down the law. Lay down that he has to be at the days three meals, that he needs to take his potions and that he needs to pull through this. Lay down what you expect of him. And don’t back down. He’s not dad or the Dark Lord. He’s sixteen, Severus. You’re bigger than him,” she stated simply before leaving the room. 

He growled. Merlin, she could be annoying when she wanted to. And right. He knew she was right and that just served to make him even more pissed off. He had been too gentle with Harry this morning. He had let his own fatherly instincts take over the rational part of his brain. He had comforted Solarin enough times over the years to know that her presence wasn’t helping him any. He needed control. He needed to get a grip and do as she said.

He made his way quickly up the stairs and stopped at the open doorway of his sisters bedroom, watching her pack, noting briefly that she was suddenly fully dressed.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“Packing. I need to get back to my life, Sev, and Harry needs you right now. I’m distracting you, bringing out all these protective comforting instincts in you,” she answered as she packed her belongings from the dresser into her duffel bag.

“But I want you to stay.” Part of him did honestly want her to stay, but he knew deep down that this was the best solution for all.

“I know. I know you want me to stay here, and that you’re harbouring the hope that I will change my mind and return to the Wizarding world. I adore you, Sev, but my mind is made up. I told you at Christmas that I would leave after New Years. I’m just following through with that.” She zipped up the bag and slipped on her coat. “I’ll be in touch. And I’m on the other end of a phone or an owl if you need me. I’ll see you soon.”

She calmly kissed him on the cheek and moved to the top of the stairs, turning briefly. “Tell Harry and Draco that I said goodbye. And just remember to keep your temper,” she said before skipping down the stairs. Severus heard the front door close and watched from the landing window as she Apparated away.

He stood stock still before taking a deep steadying breath. Harry needed stability. 

He would give it.

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Harry didn’t move as he heard the almost silent entry of his professor into his bedroom. He didn’t trust himself to speak so he just lay there, waiting.

“Sit up, Potter, and look at me.”

Harry slowly sat up and looked at his host. The man was leaning calmly against the dresser. Even without the bat-like robes, the man was still intimidating and Harry felt a sudden apprehension. 

“Professor?”

“You need to understand the rules of staying here, Potter. I’m sure Sirius and Remus would be thrilled if they found out I had let you whither away into oblivion.”

“Rules?”

“Yes. There are certain rules to this house and I expect them to be followed, is that understood?”

Harry nodded.

“Firstly, you are expected at every meal. I expect you to, at the very least, attempt to eat what is put in front of you. If you have a problem with what is served, I expect you to speak up.”

“Yes, sir.”

“It is expected of you to take your potions with breakfast.” He drew out three vials and placed them on the bed. “You did not this morning.” He watched as Harry dutifully gulped them all down without complaint, though there was a slight grimace. “Very good, Potter. Those potions are to help you to heal faster. One of them is a nutrient potion to try and get you back up to a healthier weight.”

Harry nodded and Severus felt his Potions Master persona slipping at the absolute trust Harry granted him. He took in a deep breath to regain control. Damn it, he was Severus Snape, ex-Death Eater, fearsome Potions Master. He would not be beaten by a pair of disarming green eyes.

“I expect you to tend to your own room. I have no house elves and I will not make your bed for you, Potter. I will not pamper you. You will do it yourself. I also expect full understanding that I will accept no kind of payment whatsoever from you in return for my shelter and aid. You are here because it is what you want and because I have agreed to it, not because I expect any kind of compensation.”

Harry nodded and Severus searched for how to keep his persona and say the next two rules. It was impossible. With the first it could be done, it was workable. But the second was more personal, more intimate. He couldn’t be Professor Snape. He had to be Severus.

“Two more things, Potter. The first must be followed to the letter. If I, at any time, tell you to do something such as to hide yourself or to stay silent, you must do so. Solarin warded the house and I have reinforced her magic but I cannot be sure that Lucius will not come looking here. I have certain ways to conceal you should he come. I need you to do as you are told and not panic if such a situation arises. Am I understood?”

Harry looked at him with fear in his eyes but he nodded none the less. Severus felt the weight of his students trust and felt dwarfed by it. But he had to say the last one. Solarin said to lay down ALL the rules and, damn it, he would do just that. He trusted her guidance in helping Harry heal.

Severus moved to the bed and sat down, facing Harry. He took a deep breath. “Harry, this last rule is very important, probably the most important of them all.” He paused. “Harry, if you want to talk you must do so. It can be at any time, day or night, but you must come to me. I cannot help you if you do not talk to me. If you have a question, ask it. If something is wrong, tell me and I shall try and fix it. If you are bothered by memories of what has happened to you, then you can tell them to me. I will help you heal, Harry, but you must talk to me.”

“Yes, professor.”

“As I told you yesterday, you may call me Severus. Now, I promise to keep you safe and to help you, Harry, and I intend to do just that. But there are some things I need to know, so you must answer me honestly.”

“Okay.”

“Do you want to stay here? If you would rather be returned to Sirius and Remus, or maybe to the Weasley’s, it can be arranged.”

“I want to stay here. I mean, if that’s all right?”

“You may stay, if it is what you want.”

“I want to.”

“Very well. Would you rather I sent for Madame Pomfrey? She could treat you much better than I. I have limited training in the field of healing. She would do a much better job.”

Harry paled, if it was possible. He shook his head. “No. I want you. Please?”

“It is what you want?”

“Yes. I want you.”

Severus’ voice failed momentarily at Harry exclaiming twice in quick succession that he wanted him, though not in the way Severus wished he did. “Then that is what shall happen.”

“If you don’t want to…” Harry began.

“Harry, you have asked for my help. I will give it. I want to make some things clear to you.”

“All right.”

Damn it. He knew he was giving in, that his control was slipping. It was those damn green eyes, throwing him off guard. When had they started affecting him so? 

“I will always answer you honestly, to the best of my abilities. I will never keep any information from you that I feel you should know or have a right to know. If, at any time, you wish to leave, I will not stop you. But you will be welcome here for as long as you want to reside in this house. There will never be any pressure on you to do something you are not ready for, or to reveal something you are not ready to reveal. I will try to be understanding and to keep my temper. And, finally, if you want to see someone, tell me and I shall make arrangements for you to do so, any time day or night.”

“You’re going to do all that for me?” Severus nodded at Harry‘s astonished question. “Why?”

“Because you asked.”

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Severus closed himself in the bathroom after dinner that night and tried to regain composure that had once again slipped. Harry was getting to him. That feeling that had threatened to overtake him before taking charge of Harry had once again risen in him. He barely managed to think straight during dinner.

He stepped into the shower, letting the hot water soothe away some of his tensions. He wrapped his slim fingers around his aching cock, hissing. He rarely indulged in pleasuring himself but he couldn’t deny himself tonight. Harry had affected him in ways he didn’t know how yet to ignore. He brought himself to a rapid and unfulfilling climax, biting his lower lip to keep from crying out Harry’s name. He swiftly forgot his passions and proceeded to scrub himself clean.

This was going to be impossible. How could he care for Harry and keep his instincts in check? All he wanted to do was gather the smaller creature in his arms and worship his petite body. He wanted to kiss him, to hold him, to use his touch to sweep away any memory of Lucius and what he had done. But Harry would panic, Harry would shatter. 

All he had to do was to keep himself in control until Harry was stronger. Then maybe he could let his student know that he wanted him in more than a scholarly way. 

For the first time ever in his life, he hoped he was wrong and his sister was right.

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Lucius prowled naked towards the bed, his eyes glinting with lust. Harry found himself wishing the man would leave him be for a few days, just a little time, just enough to heal a little. He was in so much pain. He didn’t want to scream and give him the satisfaction but he knew that he wouldn’t be able to hold it in.

The bed dipped with the mans weight and Harry whimpered at the pain, biting his lip to try and squash any more noise but he knew it was too late. Lucius looked down at him in triumph and Harry hated himself. Fear rose up in him at the sight of the black cloth bag in his masters hands. 

“Please,” Harry begged.

Lucius inclined his head slightly.

“Please, Lucius. I’m so sore. Please, leave me be for a few days. Just let me heal a little.”

Lucius chuckled and reached for the drawstring of the bag. Harry closed his eyes in defeat. It had worked last time, Lucius had held off using his body for a few days and performed some healing spells. Harry felt that he had been very foolish to think that Lucius would repeat his performance.

He gasped as he was flipped over onto his front, the smooth sheets feeling unnaturally rough on his damaged chest and constricted male parts. His broken legs were shoved wide open, Harry pushing his face into the sheets. 

He screamed as something cracked on his previously untouched back, feeling the skin split. Over and over the thing, whatever it was, was slashed across his skin. It seemed endless, just like every other thing that was done to him here. After what seemed an eternity, the slicing blows ended and Harry heard the sigh of appreciation from the man above him.

He was just a whore, just like Lucius had called him when he told him about the baby. He was only good for one thing, to be used like this. His hot bitter tears began to fall. He groaned as slick fingers roughly entered his arse, stretching him in painful ways. All too soon, that hard moving thing that Lucius had used on him before was thrust into him. A muttered spell had it moving brutally inside him, making him gasp in some attempt at control over the pain.

His hips were gripped harshly and he was impaled, screaming as he once more began to bleed. He screamed and begged for mercy, for freedom, for a saviour as the mans penis shoved against the hard things embedded deep inside him, tearing him.

It dragged on but eventually, Lucius groaned his release and removed himself from his abused body. Another hard thing was added to the ones inside, Harry had lost count after the third. He heard his master leave the room and cried in agony as the thing inside him continued to move.

Someone save him, please, someone, anyone. He found himself thinking about Professor Snape, about how disgusted he would be.

He was nothing but a whore.

Harry sat up in bed, his heart pounding. He managed to make his way to the toilet before his stomach gave up his dinner. He sat kneeling in front of the toilet, shaking, his whole body covered in a cold sweat. He slowly and shakily got to his feet, rinsing out his mouth and brushing his teeth in an attempt to rid his mouth of the horrible taste. He made his way back to his room and stood in the doorway, looking at his bed, the image blurred without his glasses. The thought of returning to it terrified him. One nightmarish memory was bad enough, but to spend the rest of the night like that? He worried his lower lip between his teeth. 

Severus had said that he could go to him, that he should go if he wanted to talk. But how well would the man take being woken? He briefly considered going to Draco in the room opposite his but that thought was quickly pushed out. He had only seen Draco briefly at lunch and dinner, and the conversation had been painfully difficult. Draco may have helped him gain his freedom but years of animosity between them was hard to forget. 

Harry sighed. Severus was so confusing it made his head hurt. The man seemed to have two completely different personalities. The first was something Harry was used to. Harry mentally labelled it as Scary Professor Snape. Scary Professor Snape was harsh and demanding, cold even. It was someone Harry had experience of and made him feel decidedly normal. Even without the bat robes he was still Scary Professor Snape.

But then there was Severus. Severus was emotional and kind and caring. The way Severus was with Solarin was something Harry would never have expected in a million years. The man was…for want of a better word, tender. He even joked. How could two completely different people exist in the same man? Severus was the ultimate opposite of Scary Professor Snape. Severus was calm and collected, accepting a situation and letting it play out before he reacted. Scary Professor Snape was angry and tense, rushing in headlong with some scathing comment or other. Harry wondered how the same man could be so poles apart.

He sighed in defeat and made his way to the open door of his teachers room. The hall light had once again been left on. He tried not to think too much as he made his way over to the bed. He had been as quiet as he could but somehow the man knew he was not alone and sat up slightly in the bed.

“Harry? What’s wrong?”

The mans rich baritone voice was sleepy but worried and Harry decided that the best course of action was to be honest. Severus had said he would always be honest with Harry, so he might as well return the courtesy. Besides, he had promised that he would talk.

“I had a bad dream.”

He sat up fully, beckoning Harry to sit on the bed. “Would you like to talk about it?”

Ah, Severus instead of Scary Professor Snape.

“It was just a memory.” He paused and took a deep breath. “I was in that room and he was there. He had no clothes on and he pushed me onto my front. He put that…that thing in me…that thing…the one…th-that moved,” he finished quietly. He sat down on the edge on the bed, feeling the dark gaze boring into his skin. But it was different than when Lucius had looked at him. This gaze was patient, comforting. It gave Harry the strength to continue. “He…took me…and he…” A warm comforting hand on his shoulder rubbing calm circles on his damp skin. “He used…one of those…those…things. The ones you talked about.”

“Cervix Shields?”

Harry nodded. “He left it in…the thing…the moving one.”

“I see.”

They sat in silence and Harry only noticed he was gripping the bedclothes white knuckled when gentle fingers opened his fists. 

“Would you like a potion to help you sleep?”

Harry shook his head. “I don’t want to have to use potions every time I close my eyes. I want…”

“What is it you want?”

“You’ll probably say no.”

“You don’t know that until you ask.”

He looked up into the dark eyes. “Can I stay here with you? I don’t want to be alone,” he whispered. A pause.

“You wish to sleep in my bed with me?”

“If it’s not okay, I understand….”

“It’s okay. If it is what you want?”

Harry nodded and let his host pull him into the bed, warm from Severus’ own body. The long nimble fingers tucked the blankets around him in a cocoon. He found himself gripping the mans pyjama shirt, the long thin arms wrapped around him. One hand rubbed soothing slow circles on his back while the other stroked his hair.

“You’re safe here. I won’t let him take you again.”

“Thank you, Severus.”

Harry let his calm words with his deep voice and the soft gentle touch lull him into sleep. This time he didn’t dream of Lucius. He dreamed of Severus carrying him away to some far distant place where no one could find them, where he was safe with his knight in shining armour.

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The next few weeks passed, either amazingly fast or excruciatingly slowly, Severus couldn’t quite decide. The three of them had fallen into a comfortable routine. Severus would be the first to wake, dealing with his morning needs before waking his companions, making breakfast while they dressed and made their beds. The two younger wizards would spend the morning in lessons with Severus, Harry needing a bit more attention with his classes than Draco as he had missed a whole half a year. Both boys were making good progress towards successful N.E.W.T.’s. Severus had placed a dampening field around the perimeter of the house so that the practicing of his students would not be detected by the Ministry. There were days that Harry‘s magic wouldn‘t work at all, and others where it was erratic, but these usually coincided with Harry‘s shaky days. The three of them would have lunch and then Severus would retreat into his lab, situated just off the kitchen, leaving the blonde and brunette to their own devices. He would emerge to a dinner that the boys had concocted together. It was usually edible. Their evenings were quiet, Draco retreating to his room, leaving Harry and Severus to talk alone in the living room.

Draco remained quiet and withdrawn and Severus made a mental note to call Solarin about how best to handle the blonde. Draco was at every meal, but the conversation was spotty at best. Any free time he had Draco spent shut away in his room.

Severus had tried to engage the young man several times and found his attempts met with Draco shying away, drawing further into himself. He had finally reached the decision that Draco would come to him when he was ready.

Harry, on the other hand, seemed to be making good progress. He had put on weight and there was now the small bump of his pregnancy, far smaller than it should have been but the child it held was healthy. Madame Pomfrey had sent him a book on how to handle a pregnancy in someone like Harry, telling her it was research for a project he was working on. He had found it extremely helpful. Harry was still sore but Severus kept assuring him that it would pass in time, once his body had convinced itself that it was safe from further attack. Harry attended every meal, managing to finish at least a third of his portion, if not half. He took his potions without complaint every morning, though there was that grimace at the taste. His afternoons he spent reading the material he needed to regain his place with his classes. He continued to confide in Severus, telling him of particular memories that happened upon him. Most nights saw Harry creeping into Severus’ bed to cling to the older man in fright, revealing more horrific details each time of what had happened to him in that room. It seemed to help him more than anything else, Harry gaining a little more strength and confidence with every outpouring, taking comfort in Severus’ reassurances.

But there was the bad side, the rough moments that sometimes stretched into two or three days. Days like these had Harry silent and twitchy, jumping at the slightest things and locking himself away in his room rather than sitting in the living room after lunch, though he took his books with him. Those nights were spent alone, Harry staying in his own bed rather than creeping into Severus‘ arms to cling to him in fright. Severus came to realize that neither of them got any sleep those nights. He quickly learned that Harry felt himself repulsive once more and lay awake, shaking and crying silently in fear and self hatred. Severus felt it best to leave Harry be during these nights of his self imposed solitude, telling himself that these were something Harry had to handle on his own. Severus lay awake those nights too, waiting.

When Harry had first crept to him and asked to sleep in the same bed as Severus, he had felt apprehension rise in him. Was it right to let Harry sleep with him? Was it appropriate to cradle his student to him, to soothe him, to lull him to sleep with promises of protection and safety? What would Albus think? What would Sirius and Remus say? But the trusting, unsure green eyes had worked their charm on him once again and he had caved, letting his protective instincts take over. He had tucked Harry into his own bed as tenderly as he had Solarin all those years ago, when she was still small enough to believe that her big brother hero Sevus could make anything better. He had let Harry grip at him, encased that slim frame in his arms and muttered soothing words, stroking his hair, rubbing his back. Was it right? Was it wrong? Did it matter? In all honesty, if it was what Harry needed to feel better, to heal, did it matter if it was right or not?

He was pulled out of his rationalisations as Harry stirred against his chest. The past few days had been good, Harry opening up more than he had before and even, once or twice, offering a shaky sort of smile. That it didn’t reach his eyes didn’t matter to Severus, just that Harry had attempted to smile.

“Are you all right?” he whispered into the dark. If Harry was simply moving in his sleep it was soft enough not to disturb him. Harry could also choose to pretend he hadn’t heard him if he was in one of his silent moods.

“Yes.”

The two of them lay in silence for what seemed to Severus to be a long time before Harry spoke again.

“Severus?” came the quiet hesitant question.

“Yes, Harry?”

“Can I see Sirius and Remus?”

“Of course. I can go and call them now if you’d like.”

“No, the morning is fine. Is it okay if they come here? I want to see them.”

“That is fine. You know you don’t have to see anyone until you’re ready for it.”

“I know. I want to see them.” Severus could feel the hesitation in the sprite and he lay patiently, waiting. “How do I tell them?”

“Tell them what?”

“What I am. What happened. The baby.”

Severus searched his mind for some way to reassure without revealing that his sister had already told them of Harry’s condition, as he dubbed it, and of Lucius’ abuse. He couldn’t find one so he decided the truth was, once again, the best option.

“Harry, when Solarin went to collect some of your things she had to answer a few questions. She tried to do so in a way that would keep your privacy but she was forced into a corner by your godfather. She said he was being unreasonable, she got the impression he was going to rush in here and take you from my care. She had to reveal some things to them.”

“Who?”

“Sirius, Remus, Albus, Molly and Arthur. No one else was told and the five of them were sworn to secrecy, though they did want to enact their own brand of justice for you.”

Harry sat up and leaned his elbows on his crossed legs, Severus coming up to sit in a similar fashion beside him.

“They really left her with no other choice, Harry,” Severus tried to reassure.

“I understand. What do they know?” The quiet voice was calm, vaguely interested, but mostly unsure.

“They know what you are. They also know of what you went through. They do not know details, no one but you and I know those as you have only confided in me. They do not know of your pregnancy. At the time you had not expressed whether you wished to continue in the pregnancy, so she felt it wise to omit that piece of information.”

“How did they take it?”

“From what Solarin told me when she returned, they were exceedingly angry. They wished for punishment of Lucius. When they objected to her telling them they had to leave it be she was forced to reveal your condition, as you call it.”

“And?”

Severus needed no explanation as to the meaning of the one worded question. “They were shocked, obviously. Even Sirius had no idea of your condition. They were upset that Lily and James never told them. But they showed no repulsion. None of them were disgusted by it. They are your family, they care for you the same way they have always done. They were all told not to mention it until you do. I believe they will hold to that. They all agreed not to tell anyone of your return, the abuse you suffered or of your condition. As far as I know, they are the only ones besides Draco, Solarin and myself, that know of your return.”

“Oh.”

Severus sat there silently as Harry’s mind worked. He knew what was coming next, he would have to be Neville Longbottom not to. He just hoped he could remain calm enough to deal with it.

“Family is important, isn’t it?”

“Yes. For some, like Sirius, family is the most important thing in the world.”

“What about you? Is family important to you?”

“In a way.”

“If you don’t want to talk about this, I’ll stop asking,” Harry offered.

Severus took a deep breath. Was he comfortable talking about this? To Harry, to anyone? Yes, to Harry he was. He just wasn’t sure he could find the right words.

“I am uncomfortable but I will answer your questions. I find it difficult to talk about my family to anyone. It is not you, it is me.” He sighed. “I suppose my behaviour when Solarin was here has prompted this?”

“I guess. You seem different with her. More relaxed. I don’t really understand.”

“I raised Solarin. I took custody of her, with Albus’ help, when I was seventeen.”

“That’s a lot of responsibility to have fresh out of Hogwarts.”

“It was better than the alternative.”

“What do you mean? What was the alternative?”

“A few days after I graduated my mother was killed. The choice was either to leave Solarin with my father or to raise her myself.”

“Severus, I’m sorry, but I don’t understand.”

“Harry, my father was an alcoholic. He was…abusive. He killed my mother.” Severus pushed back the memories of his mothers broken body on the cold hospital gurney, of Solarin clinging to him while she cried, of his fathers drunken slurs and ranting. “My father abused my mother until, one day, her body just couldn’t handle anymore. The police believed that she died trying to protect my sister from him. My father was incarcerated for the murder of my mother. He died in prison seven years later. Solarin would have ended up in muggle foster care, people hardly able to handle her. My father hated magic. My mother was one target, a Pure Blood. When I was young, I was another. But Solarin.” He laughed bitterly without humour. “She managed to provoke his rage better than any of us.”

“Why?”

“Because of what she is. She is an augur.”

“What’s that?”

“An augur is a natural Legilimens. She can enter a mind without the target knowing it. It’s quite painless. She prefers to use her skills to read someone’s emotions, though. She can also predict the future, though it is something she doesn’t do very often. She is a very powerful witch. When she was young she would do certain things, summoning a toy from another room, levitating a jar she couldn’t reach, see into other peoples dreams. My father took offence at a two year old doing those kinds of things.”

“Oh.” Harry was silent for a few moments. “Did she do it to me?”

“Do what?”

“Go into my mind.”

“Yes, Harry, she did. When I was healing you. I asked her to,” Severus replied carefully.

“Why?”

“Because there were things I needed to know and you were in no fit state to tell them to me. I apologise for having her do that.”

“It’s okay. I don’t suppose I would have done any different if our roles had been reversed.”

They sat there in silence for a while before Harry lay back down, Severus joining him and wrapping his arms around the sprite.

“Severus?”

“Hmm?”

“Why do you have my journal? I found it in the living room.”

Ah. Suddenly it occurred to Severus that perhaps he should have returned the diary to Myrtle, or at least hidden it. How well would Harry take the news that he had read it?

“Myrtle gave it to me.”

“Oh. Severus? Have you read it?”

Damn it. Harry seemed to be gaining confidence a little faster than Severus had anticipated. 

“Yes, Harry, I have. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have.”

“Oh.”

“Are you angry with me?”

“Depends. When did you read it?”

“Before we found you.”

“Then no, I’m not angry.”

“I don’t understand,” Severus said warily.

“It’s not like you were trying to invade my privacy. You were trying to find me. It might have given you some clues or something. I understand why you read it. But you didn’t let anyone else read it, right?” Harry stated simply, leaving no room for argument.

“No, I didn’t. Actually, no one but Myrtle knows I have it.”

They didn’t talk after that, Harry letting Severus soothe him to sleep.

Severus lay there, feeling the sprite breathe and cling to him, even in sleep. Harry had accepted him, accepted his sorry story of his sorry childhood without offering any kind of emotion, somehow knowing that those emotional responses were unwanted. And the trust. The trust Harry showed him was slightly overwhelming. It wasn’t the same kind of trust that anyone had ever shown him before. Could it be possible? Could she be right? Could it be possible that Harry still had some kind of romantic interest in him? 

Or was he simply reading too much into this?

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Sirius sat in his kitchen nursing a cup of strong black coffee. He’d left Remus sleeping after an intense, almost violent, coupling. They had been doing more and more of that lately, losing themselves in each other to try and forget the ache of their missing son. 

He stared darkly into the inky liquid as certain thoughts crept in once more, thoughts that had plagued him almost daily since that strange girl in his kitchen had nearly made his head explode.

He wanted to see Harry, wanted to hold him and know that he was safe and whole. But that was just it. Harry wasn’t whole, he wasn’t safe. Logically, he knew that Albus would never leave Harry somewhere that would be harmful to him. But Harry had been raped, brutally if the girls vague explanations were anything to go by. Harry would probably never let anyone touch him again, never be safe again. 

Owned by Lucius Malfoy.

What would Lucius do to get him back? Was Snape really a good enough wizard to keep Harry safe? Why the hell hadn’t Lily and James told him?

That one plagued him more than most, like a constant ache in the back of his mind. The answer was always hot on the tail of it: They were trying to protect him. 

Logically, Sirius reasoned, if he had been in their position, he probably wouldn’t have told anyone either, the risk of Harry being abused was too great. It didn’t stop him from being angry at them.

He dropped his mug as the fire sprang to life, Snape’s head appearing in the flames.

“Snape. What do you want? Going to set your sister on me again?” Sirius asked while he used his wand to clear away the mess of coffee.

Snape looked momentarily confused. “Ah, yes. Solarin did mention something about losing her temper. I apologise. She never has had good control over it.”

“So, what do you want if it’s not to have her force me to my knees in pain?”

“Harry has asked to see you and Remus.”

Sirius sat there, momentarily too stunned to speak as the news sank in. Weeks since Harry was found and he was finally asking for them? And Snape was taking his snide remarks very well. Better than he ever had, in fact.

“Really?” Sirius asked, disbelieving.

“Yes, he asked last night if I would call you this morning. He wishes for you to come here and have lunch with him.”

“Will you be at lunch?”

“If it is what Harry wants. If not I will find some way to occupy myself while you visit.”

Sirius got to his feet. “We’ll be through soon.”

“Very well. The address is Spinners End. Lunch will be at one but I see no reason why you cannot spend the morning with him.”

Snape’s head disappeared and Sirius bounded up the stairs, glancing at the hall clock. Nine am. He had four hours before lunch but he was desperate to see Harry. Well, he reasoned, he and Remus could find some way to occupy time in the shower. And then there was the gathering of things that they wanted to take to Harry, like the Christmas presents Molly had stacked neatly in one of the kitchen cupboards. 

He slipped into his room, the space darkened by the thick curtains. He disrobed and eased himself into bed beside his nude husband, sleeping soundly on his front, his slim muscular arms wrapped around the pillow under his head.

“Remus…Remus,” Sirius called gently, running his fingers in ghost like caresses across the smooth expanse of pale flesh that made up his lovers back, the illusion of perfection slightly marred by the raw looking scratches he had inflicted last night. He dropped gentle kisses on the mans shoulders until he felt him move.

“Mmm, what time is it?” Remus asked sleepily, rolling into the warm arms.

“A little after nine.”

“Uhh, why the blazes are you waking me?” Remus grumbled, turning over so he could bury his head in Sirius’ chest.

“Because Snape just fire called. Harry wants to see us.”

Sirius smirked at the amazed, slightly befuddled sleepy look on the werewolf’s face as he raised his head. 

“Really?”

“Really. He wants us to come for lunch, which is at one. Snape said we could go and spend some time with him before that if we wanted. I say we kill time until twelve, so we don’t look too overbearing. We don’t want to scare him.”

“Is he sure Harry’s ready?” Remus asked, slipping into concerned parent mode.

“He said Harry asked for us last night. He said that Harry wanted us called this morning and invited for lunch. It seemed as if Harry had specified that we’re to go there and not the other way round.”

“But he’s bound to be fragile still. It’s only been a short time, Siri.”

“I know. But I want to see him. You can stay home if you like…” Sirius teased. He was rewarded with Remus pinning him to the mattress.

“Don’t. Even. Think. About. It,” he growled between kisses. “You’re not going to see him without me. You said Snape said he asked for both of us. If that’s what he wants, then I’ll be damned if we don’t give it to him. Are you really going to be the one who holds back on giving our boy everything he wants?”

“No! Well, maybe not absolutely everything, that would be a bit ridiculous. But I’m going to give him this. So we should really get showered and dressed.”

The two of them moved swiftly to the bathroom where they thoroughly enjoyed their usual routine of sharing a shower. Before too long they were gathering Harry’s gifts and moving to the fireplace, noticing that they had lingered long enough to only make themselves half an hour early. 

Remus stepped forwards first, kissing Sirius gently before stepping into the flames. 

Sirius watched his husband whip out of sight before grabbing his own handful of floo powder and following him through.

“Spinners End.”

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Harry watched as Draco practically inhaled his sandwich before disappearing to his bedroom once more.

“You know, Draco’s becoming more and more hermit-like every day,” Harry commented as Severus slid the pie into the oven. It was one of the ones Molly had sent unbaked and Harry was sure it would taste just as good as all the other food she had sent for him. “Is it okay for him to spend so much time alone?”

Severus sighed and leaned against the kitchen counter, his eyes scanning the slim form of his charge as he wiped his hands on a tea towel. Harry had convinced him to magically conceal his pregnancy. Severus had agreed for one reason and one reason only: to avoid unwelcome questions should Harry decide not to reveal his condition today. “I am unsure. I assume he will talk when he is ready. Draco never witnessed any of the Dark Lord’s atrocities, seeing you in such a bad way must have had an effect on him. I think he just needs time to sort things through in his head.”

“I guess.”

“Molly’s instruction’s claim the pie requires an hour to cook. Shall we amuse ourselves?”

The two of them moved to the living room and engaged themselves in a game of chess, Harry’s heart not really in it as he kept glancing at the clock. Severus let himself fall into stupid mistakes to try and draw it out, waiting for Harry to speak. 

“Severus, are you going to be joining us for lunch?” Harry asked after his seventh peek at the clock.

“If you want me to. If you don’t I’m sure I can find some way to amuse myself while you spend time with your adoptive fathers,” Severus replied, putting one of his bishops in the way of Harry’s queen, asking to be taken.

Harry let his nerves rule him for a moment. He wasn’t ready to do this without his lifeline. “Stay?”

“If you insist.”

The two of them were silent until the floo roared to life, startling Harry so badly that one of the glass ornaments on the mantle shattered with his uncontrolled magic. The Animagus and werewolf stepped through, Remus slightly ahead of Sirius. Severus greeted them politely and turned around to look at his young companion, only to find the room behind him empty and the door to the stairs open.

“Give me a minute. Stay here,” Severus said calmly before making his way up the stairs. He found Harry in the bathroom, sitting on the lip of the tub, shaking.

“Harry?”

“I’m sorry! I just…I…”

Severus crossed to him and knelt before the terrified Gryffindor. “It’s all right. You panicked. Quite understandable. How about we chalk this one up to a momentary lapse in sanity, hmm?”

Harry smiled shakily before his panic enveloped him once more. 

“Severus?” he whispered.

“Yes?”

“What if they hate me?”

“Why would they?”

“Because of the baby, because I couldn’t get rid of it?”

Harry didn’t quite know why he was admitting this fear he had to Severus but he suddenly had the uncontrollable need for his reassurance. He watched the dark eyes, the pale skin, waiting.

“If they do then I will make them leave. But, Harry, they adore you. You are their boy. Well, not exactly, but you get the idea. They still feel the same way they have always done.”

“But will they once they know?”

“Harry, if Solarin was to come to me right now and tell me that she had been treated in the same way you were and she cannot go through with a termination I wouldn’t hate her. I would continue to adore her in the same way I have always done. With the exception of a limited few, a parents affection is unconditional. I’m sure that Remus and Sirius will not reject you.”

“But if they do?”

“If they do, then I will make them leave and they will not return. I will protect you, Harry, just like I promised.”

He didn’t know what made him do it but he couldn’t stop himself. He was sure a rational person would have been able to keep control but he was hardly rational. All he knew was that he needed it, needed it more than anything else in that moment, more than anything in his whole life.

Harry leaned forwards and kissed Severus.

They were still for a moment and then Severus kissed back. It was nothing like the forced kisses from Lucius. This kiss was sweet and gentle and almost hesitant. Severus’ hands came up to grip his own, their fingers entwining, and Harry found himself relaxing into the unexpected intimacy. The gentle lips tenderly moved against his own and he happened upon the sudden understanding that he didn’t feel ugly at all, not when Severus was kissing him back, that there was no fear of this mans touch. That he trusted this man to be honest and to never hurt him and to keep him safe. He reluctantly broke the kiss and looked into the dazed and confused dark eyes, marvelling at the way his control had slammed back into place.

“I’ve wanted to do that since the Occlumency lessons. I just…I…I figured….” Harry stuttered.

“You thought I wouldn’t want you.”

He looked at him in surprise. 

“I read your journal. Harry…” Severus trailed off uncharacteristically. “Harry, I’ve wanted you since the lessons too. But after he did those things to you, I never thought you would ever let anyone near you like that, especially not me.”

“But I trust you the most.”

Severus smiled a shy sort of smile and Harry was fascinated by the faint blush that stained the older mans pale cheeks. Severus straightened and Harry watched as the blush disappeared, Severus regaining his control and his composure. 

“I will be downstairs. Get yourself under control and come join us,” Severus said, the command leaving no room for argument or any idea of disobedience in Harry, but the tone was gentle.

Severus swept from the room and Harry looked himself over in the mirror.

Severus wanted him.

He felt better than he had in months.

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Severus paused at the top of the stairs and allowed himself a brief smile.

Harry wanted him. Harry still wanted him.

He regained his common sense. ‘Don’t let his parents see this,” Severus thought. ‘Don’t let them see how much sway he has over me. They’ll probably kill me for it.’

He descended the stairs to be greeted by the two men snapping their attention on him as soon as he entered.

“He had a momentary bout of panic. He’s all right. He’ll be down in a minute,” Severus explained, seeing the relief spread across their faces. ‘Please don’t prove me wrong,’ he thought.

“How is he, generally?” Remus asked.

“He’s doing much better. There are still a few quirks but overall he is making excellent headway into good health all round. However, saying that I must tell you of what he won’t tolerate, of what will panic him and make him retreat.”

“We were expecting as much,” Sirius answered and Severus found himself surprised at how calm the man was. 

“Well, he knows that you have been told of his condition, as he calls it, and of what Lucius Malfoy did to him. He is aware that you know none of the details. Do not talk about either his status as a hermaphrodite or of Lucius unless he embarks on it. Do not touch him unless he initiates it, as it is he is very reluctant of physical contact. Try not to lose your tempers if he suddenly grabs my hand. Harry has been using me as his anchor, he will only do it if he feels panicky or needs reassurance.”

“We understand,” Remus answered.

“Try to keep the conversation light, let him lead your choice of topic. Above all, no matter what he tells you, no matter the details, you must not recoil from him. He is unsure of your affections towards him.”

“But we love him! He’s ours,” Sirius argued.

“On some level, he knows that. But he is unsure. His doubt and his experiences have him questioning your affection for him. He needs reassurance more than anything from you.”

The two men nodded and they could hear slow footsteps on the stairs.

“One more thing. Harry has identified as male. Try to refer to him as such.”

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Lunch went smoothly, Molly’s pie going down well. The lunchtime conversation was light and inconsequential, Remus and Sirius talking about potions and the state of the Ministry with Severus, letting Harry take his time. After they had eaten, Severus served up coffees and teas in the living room, waiting for Harry to join the conversation.

Harry noticed that Severus had transfigured the room to accommodate them all comfortably, something he had been too nervous to take in before his adoptive fathers arrived. Instead of the rickety sofa and battered armchair huddled around a fragile looking coffee table, there were now four squashy armchairs gathered around a round table. The overall effect made the room seem easier, somehow. He contemplated asking Severus to keep the room like this permanently. 

He glanced at Severus, sitting beside him, for courage before finding his voice.

“How’s Ron?”

There was a fraction of a second where the room was silent.

“He’s fine. He and Hermione are expecting their first child in July. Molly will care for the child while the two of them complete their final year. They miss you. All of us do,” Remus answered.

Harry reached out to grip Severus’ hand.

“I need to tell you something,” Harry said quietly. Instantaneously, he couldn’t find the words. He looked at Severus and took strength in the reassuring nod. “When he…Lu-Lucius…when he…to-took me, he…um…he…”

“It’s all right, Harry. Whatever it is, you can tell us,” Remus reassured.

“You can tell us anything, Harry,” Sirius chipped in.

“I’m pregnant,” Harry blurted, hardly daring to look at their faces. Severus’ fingers squeezed his.

“Oh. Well…um…” Sirius was floundering. He looked at Remus.

“Have you given thought to what you want to do, Harry?” Remus asked quietly, wishing he could hug Harry and show him that they didn’t care, that he was still theirs, but he restrained himself.

“I’m going to go through with the pregnancy. I couldn’t…get rid of it…I just…” He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, as if he was blowing steam away from a bowl of soup like Severus had taught him. “I couldn’t do that, have someone…touch me…there. I don’t know what I want to do but I couldn’t do…that.”

The room was unnaturally silent. Harry dared to look up from the faded carpet and saw Sirius and Remus looking at him. They looked like they were in deep shock, Sirius even had his mug of coffee halfway to his lips, suspended in midair. 

“All right, Harry. If that’s what you want,” Sirius said calmly, his mug still hanging there, but his eyes were honest as he looked at Harry.

“You’re okay with it?” Harry asked in disbelief.

“Oh pup, of course we are. You’re ours, our boy. Why would we feel any different because of this? Harry, we love you and nothing whatsoever could ever change that,” Remus said, his eyes kind and sincere.

Harry let go of Severus and reached out a shaky hand, letting Remus and then Sirius grip his fingers. He wasn’t ready at that moment for the boisterous hugs the two of them usually bestowed upon him but he wanted to touch them, wanted them to know that he was all right. He had Severus remove the concealment charm on his small baby bump.

Harry relaxed into the conversation after that, even inserting a few light jokes though his smiles were forced. He opened his gifts and let out genuinely pleased responses to the thoughtful presents, telling his thanks to his adoptive parents to pass on to the gift givers. At the end of the afternoon when it was time for Sirius and Remus to leave, Harry surprised everyone when he briefly, and very lightly, hugged each of them.

Severus let out a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding. 

Damn it, he hated it when she was right.

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Severus awoke in the dead of night to the sound of sobbing. He first thought it was Harry, but then his sleep haze lifted and he remembered Harry was in his bed, sleeping soundly in his arms. He smiled briefly at the memory of Harry’s quiet kisses as they slipped into bed. The day had gone well, Remus and Sirius visiting for the second time. It had been a week from the first and Harry handled their presence much better this time. Only one tiny panic. 

“Where are you going?” Harry mumbled drowsily as he eased his arm out from under him. 

“To check on Draco. I thought I heard something. Probably nothing. Go back to sleep,” Severus replied, dropping a light kiss on his temple, wrapping the covers around the teen. He smiled. Harry had wriggled down, gripping at Severus’ still warm pillow, already claimed by slumber once more. 

Severus slipped from the room and into the dimly lit hallway, following the badly muffled sobs to Draco’s room.

“Draco?” Severus called softly. “Draco, are you all right?”

The sobs met him as his only answer and Severus steeled himself before he slowly opened the door, not expecting for a moment to find what awaited him.

Draco, sitting on the floor naked, carving up his arms with his potions knife, tears streaming down his face.

Severus crossed the room in quick strides, wrestling the blade from his godson. He snatched up the blanket from the bed and draped it over Draco, pulling out his wand from the pocket of his bathrobe and casting healing charms.

“Draco, what…why did you do this?” Severus asked when he had finished, the pale boy still sobbing brokenly.

“Severus?”

He turned to see Harry standing in the doorway, unsure of his welcome.

“Harry, go back to bed. It’s all right, I can handle this.”

“Is he okay?”

“He will be fine. Go back to bed,” Severus urged, gratified when the young being left. Severus turned his attentions back to Draco. “Talk to me.”

“I…I c-can’t!” Draco exclaimed between sobs.

“Yes, you can. Come on, Draco. Whatever it is, you can tell me.”

“Oh Merlin!”

Severus gripped the slim shoulders, startled by the flinch and the look of repulsion on the teens face, snatching his hands away.

“Draco, what happened to Harry…did it ever happen to you?” he asked quietly, hoping that he was wrong, startled by the fiercely accusing glare.

“No! Oh, but that’s the problem!”

“I don’t understand.”

“I…uncle Sev…I can’t…it won’t…” Draco stuttered.

“Take your time,” Severus urged, using the same gentle coaxing he had employed with Harry.

“I can’t get it up,” Draco whispered brokenly, looking away in shame. 

“What do you mean?” Severus asked, genuinely confused.

“I…I can’t get an erection.”

“You mean since you found Harry?”

“No, I mean, I’ve never been able to.” Something like a dam seemed to break in Draco with the statement. He looked imploringly at Severus. “Oh Merlin. I’ve never been able to. And my skin, when someone touches me it’s so mortifying, it feels so horrible, my skin crawls when someone touches me, even when I’ve got clothes on. And I don’t feel right, I never have. It’s like my skin is all wrong, my body is all wrong. And I talked to my father, he said it was normal, but it’s not, is it? He said it would pass, that everyone felt this way, that I’d outgrow it, but he lied, didn’t he? It didn’t pass, and others don’t feel this way, and I didn’t outgrow it,” Draco said in a rush, his eyes willing Severus to understand.

“Slow down. For me to understand, I need you to answer my questions. Is that all right?”

“Yes.”

“You have always hated the touch of others, even when you were small? It has always made your skin crawl?”

“Always.”

“And you have always felt that there is something wrong with your body, that you don’t quite fit into it?”

“Yes.”

“The erections. Have you honestly never had one, maybe first thing in the morning?”

“Never.”

“Never felt aroused, never felt heat build inside you when you are near another?”

“No. I don’t feel any of that. I’ve never felt that for anyone.”

“No sexual feelings at all?”

“No.” Draco sighed. “It’s not right is it? He lied, didn’t he, my father, when he said everyone felt this way, when he said it would pass?”

“No, Draco, it is not right. And yes, he did lie to you.” Severus sighed. “I don’t know what it is, Draco, but I will help you. I will try to find some way to make this right, to make this better.”

“Honestly?”

“Honestly. But you must promise me that you will never do something like this again,” Severus demanded, holding up the knife.

“I promise.”

“All right. Now, there is nothing that can be done tonight. You should try to get some sleep,” Severus said as the pale figure pulled on his discarded pyjamas. He held back the covers as Draco climbed into bed, draping them over, careful not to touch him. “I will call Solarin in the morning, see if I can get her to come and do a reading for you. Is it all right if I talk to Professor Dumbledore of this?”

“I suppose. You…you won’t tell anyone else, will you?” Draco asked, his voice suddenly sleepy, the revelations draining on him.

“For the time being, I will not. But if it comes to the point where I need to talk to a healer of this I will have to.”

“All right. But for now we can keep this quiet, right?”

“Of course.” Severus crossed to the door. “Try to sleep. I’ll see you at breakfast.”

Severus noted the slight nod, the boy already halfway to sleep, before he stepped into the hallway, closing the door so it stood ajar. He leaned against the wall. There was no way it was all unconnected. Severus didn’t believe in coincidence, life was just too complicated for that. Draco’s ‘symptoms’, the abduction of Harry, Lucius’ behaviour in the weeks that followed the Dark Lord’s downfall. Lucius had become positively disgusting to be around since the Light sides victory. He had always been a bit obnoxious, a bit too full of himself to be stood in anything but small doses. But after Voldemort’s fall he had become worse, even up to the point where he had alienated all around him, including his wife. Narcissa had left him, travelling to somewhere in the south of France to reside with a friend until she could get herself in order.

While Lucius had always been cold and cruel, he had never before sunk to these new lows. Lucius had indulged in rape when the Death Eaters had gone on raids, something Severus had always been excused from, but as far as he knew the Malfoy patriarch had never sought out prey for himself.

How had he found out about Harry’s condition when the teens own godfather had never known? Why had he been so brutal, so savage? What was wrong with Draco? Why had Lucius lied to his son?

And then there was always the slight remembrance of what Solarin had said to him about Draco’s ‘white noise’, about it being loud. He had never heard of his sister finding a mind she couldn’t read. There were those she didn’t want to read, those she didn’t enjoy reading, but never one she couldn’t read.

They were all connected, he was sure of it. He just didn’t know how. He pushed off from the wall and made his way back to bed. He slipped into the warm covers, startled when Harry didn’t roll to him in his usual way. Maybe the sprite was genuinely asleep.

“Severus?” came the quiet, fearful question.

“What’s wrong?” Severus answered immediately.

“Nothing. Well…I don’t know…”

Severus felt sudden worry rise in him. “What is it?”

Harry’s hand hesitantly gripped his own and brought it over to the smooth uncovered skin of the slight bump of his abdomen. He felt the hard hit of a limb and allowed himself a brief smile.

“What is that?” Harry asked, his voice full of worry.

“That is the baby. It’s kicking.”

“Really? That’s all it is?”

“Yes. The child is just letting you know it’s there. Did it frighten you?”

“A little,” Harry admitted. “I didn’t know what it was. It’s why I came to find you, when you were with Draco.”

Harry’s voice sounded resigned and Severus wanted to comfort the young hermaphrodite. He rolled onto his side facing Harry and let his fingers move in a gentle caress across the warm flesh beneath them.

“It’s perfectly normal. Is this the first time you have felt it move?”

“No. I just thought maybe it was me, because I was so sore, so I ignored it. Will it stop soon?”

“Maybe.”

There was a long silence in which both of Harry’s hands came down to rest upon Severus’.

“Severus…I…I…”

“It’s all right, Harry. You can tell me.”

“I want…I…” A frustrated sigh. “I want it.”

“Want what?”

“The baby. I want the baby.”

Severus couldn’t quite form a sentence and he made a few spluttering sounds. ‘Smooth,’ he thought to himself. “Are you sure that is what you want?”

“Yes.” A quiet sigh. “At first I just kept thinking about what he’d done to me, about how I ended up pregnant. But then this thought kept creeping into my head.”

“What thought?”

“That maybe I’m meant to have this child.” A humourless laugh. “I sound like Trelawney. But he starved me, he beat me, I lost so much blood that you had me on blood replenishing potions for days on end. But I lived and so did the baby. That’s got to mean something. Maybe it means that I’m meant to have it, that maybe the baby is special.”

The hushed thought worked it’s way into Severus’ head, ‘just like you.’ Out loud he replied, “Maybe.” 

“And I kept thinking about it, and thinking about it. The thought of giving it away, of knowing that someone else was raising my child. It just made me think of the Dursley’s. And then it came to me that I want it, I want this baby…Is that foolish?”

“No. Not in the slightest.”

“I don’t even know the first thing about babies, and I’m only sixteen, and my N.E.W.T.’s…”

Severus leaned in and silenced the young being with a gentle, fleeting kiss. 

“And then there’s you,” Harry said shakily.

Severus looked at him in confusion. How had a rant about the pros and cons of keeping the baby become about him?

“Me and you…being together…I can’t…expect you to…accept…another mans child,” Harry stuttered, his gaze fixed on the ceiling, his fingers gripping at Severus’.

Severus let his swirling thoughts take over. Could Harry possibly be saying that he wanted a long term relationship? That he wanted Severus to be around permanently? That he wanted Severus to help him raise his child, to be its father? Until this point, Severus had assumed that Harry was merely using him to gain some sort of confidence in physical contact, the assumption always hastily followed by the assertion that Harry would never use someone like that. He pondered it. If it were up to him, he would claim Harry forever, use his touch and his words to sweep away any memory of Lucius. But it wasn’t just up to him. It was up to Harry.

And then there was the child.

Could he do it? Could he bring up another mans child? Accept it as his own? No, his mind supplied, but it didn’t really matter. The child was Harry’s regardless of the other father. He considered it logically. Biologically, Solarin was his sister, that being the only way the two of them were related. But in his mind, and his heart, he recognised that she had been more his child than she had ever been his parents.

Blood didn’t matter…

“…only love,” Severus mumbled. He looked up to find Harry slowly slipping on his slippers and moving to the door. Ah. Maybe he had contemplated for a tad too long?

“Harry, come back, I was thinking, not ignoring you or pushing you away,” Severus cried softly as he sat up, causing the younger man to turn and look at him. Damn those green eyes. His response to them had only gotten worse since Harry had convinced him to repair them, finally ridding himself of his glasses. “Come here,” he said, holding out a hand. Relief spread through him as the slim fingers slipped into his, the sprite allowing him to pull him back to the bed. He sat Harry down on the patterned comforter, facing him.

“You went quiet…I…I…th-thought…”

“You thought I was pushing you away. I’m sorry, I lost myself in thought for a moment back there. Forgive me?” Severus explained, dropping a light kiss on Harry’s knuckles.

“I forgive you.”

“Harry…Merlin, I promised myself I wouldn’t do this,” Severus mumbled to himself more than Harry. “Harry, what I feel for you is not lust, it is something else. Something deeper. I’m sorry I can’t give you a name for it but I have no experience with it, I don’t know what to call it. But I know this: I will never leave you.”

Severus watched as a few slow tears trickled from the green eyes and he tenderly wiped them away.

“You…you’re talking like…you lo-love me?”

“I suppose it must be love, in consideration of the general concept of the word. But all my experience of that word and the emotion attached to it are of something bad happening to those involved. I do not wish that for you.” Severus sighed. “My father claimed he loved my mother and he killed her,” he whispered.

A gentle hand curled around his cheek, slipping into his hair. “You are not your father.”

“Are you sure? He had a terrible temper, and he liked a drink, and he was a bully. How can you say I’m not him? I verbally abused you for five years, I was harsh to the point of being cruel. I lose my temper far too easily. And I like the occasional drink. How can you trust that I am not like him?”

“Severus, have you ever hit anyone?”

“Not with my fists, but I have done terrible things.”

“As a Death Eater, and to stay hidden as a spy.” Harry sighed and Severus realized that it was Harry’s turn to save him. “Will you hurt me?” Harry whispered.

“Never. I would sooner die.”

“Then that’s all I need to know. This thing between us, whatever we choose to call it, is all I need to know.”

Severus looked down at the small bump of Harry’s abdomen. “You mean this thing?” he asked with a smirk as he laid a careful hand on it.

Harry smirked back. “No, I meant this emotion between us, but yes, there is this thing as well,” he replied, laying his hand on top of Severus’. “If you can’t accept the child…”

“I cannot bring up another mans child, Harry, but that is not an issue here.” Confusion in the emerald gaze, all traces of the smirk gone. “This is not Lucius’ child, Harry, it is yours. That is all that matters. I can and will raise your child with you, if it is what you want.”

Severus suddenly found Harry crawling into his arms, wrapping his slim arms around his shoulders. He slowly let his own arms make their way around the thin torso, the swell of the child between them as they held each other.

“I love you,” Harry whispered against his neck.

Severus pulled back, looking Harry in the eye. “Harry, I…I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t. I trust you. You are not your father, we are not your parents. I love you,” Harry whispered.

Severus looked deep into the trusting emerald eyes. “I love you,” he whispered, his voice barely above the silence. Those sweet lips joined his, the chaste kisses deepening slightly as Harry displayed his emotions.

All other thought vanished from his mind. Nothing else mattered, not in that moment. Draco could wait, the whole world could. To hell with it all.

Harry loved him.

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Dear Sevus,

I wish I could come sooner but the earliest I can come is the first week of April. It is not convenient for me to keep disappearing. People are still asking questions about Christmas and, besides, I’m not at your bloody beck and call.  
I can imagine the look you’re giving me right now and I know what you’re thinking, ‘It would be easier if she lived in the Wizarding World’. See? I know you too well.   
I am worried by Draco’s symptoms, though. I’ve never heard of anything like he’s describing, but I will look it up in the meanwhile. It sounds like a hex or something, but I don’t know of any hex that could cause all that, and, as you well know, I know more hexes than most. Tell him that I will do my best for him.  
How is Harry? You seemed to have glossed over that bit of information quite a lot in your letter. Seems that I may have been right, big brother. Not wanting to gloat but I told you so. Allow me it just this once.  
Stop scowling, Sevus, I can see it as I write. You know that you like it. You like that I was right about this, admit it to yourself. By what you did put I can see that he is getting along fine with you. Merciful Merlin, you even seem to have come to a truce with Sirius. Oh, will you tell him sorry again for me? I know, I know, I shouldn’t have lost my temper like that, I could have done him some real damage. But you, of all people, know what I’m like.   
I’m getting off track. Tell Draco not to worry, whatever this is, we will fix it. I will see you soon. That’s the first week of April, in case you’d gotten distracted earlier in the letter with your, how did you put it? That’s it, ’disarming green eyes’. I know I’m pissing you off but it’s a sisters prerogative. I have to go anyway, I’m already late for work.

See you soon.

Love Sol.

XXX

“Damn girl!” he exclaimed as he slammed the letter down on the table, making Harry, Draco, Sirius and Remus jump. The four of them looked at him strangely as he sat down in between Draco and Sirius. The seating arrangements were a test of how well Harry could handle an increased number of people in the small space of the kitchen. Harry sat near the door, Draco to his right and Remus to his left. Severus was sat at one end of the table, making it clear that he would not tolerate being more than one person away from Harry with his stoic body language.

Of course the letter would arrive during Remus and Sirius’ third visit, of course her wording would piss him off. He really should have postponed reading it. He folded it and slipped it into his pocket.

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay. What’s she done?” Draco asked. He had gained confidence since his cathartic outpouring to Severus. He had even agreed to join them for the visit and was engaged in a close game of chess with Sirius. The Slytherin had been spending hardly any time in his room over the past few days. He and Harry had come to a shaky sort of friendship, the two of them spending an hour or two each day together in the sitting room, talking more often than anything else, yet Harry still remained clueless as to what had happened between the blonde and Severus.

“I send her an owl asking for her help, it takes her a month to reply and she sends me this! She says, and I quote, ‘it is not convenient for me to keep disappearing. People are still asking questions about Christmas and, besides, I’m not at your bloody beck and call’. She says she can’t come until April! Typical. You know, if she lived in the Wizarding World this would be a whole lot easier,” Severus griped, the end of his tirade more to himself than any of the others, as he began to make more tea.

Harry noticed Sirius’ look of amazement and Remus‘ barely concealed smile. Of course, they had only ever seen Scary Professor Snape, they had never witnessed Severus. But Harry had. He glanced at Draco, the pale boy looking completely unconcerned of the outburst, strategising his next move, determined to win against his cousin. 

Harry let it all wash over him. Severus had become more open, just short of being completely laid bare, over the last week. Ever since they had admitted to each other how they felt it had become so much easier. Severus still had his moments of Scary Professor Snape, but they were apologised for most times, Severus realising that he was a little too cold. He and Harry had gone no further than kisses and caresses in areas Harry deemed ‘safe’. His hands, face, back and arms were the safe areas, his neck and stomach joining the list only last night as Severus had shown him how nice kisses there could be. 

“What are you smiling at?” 

Harry snapped out of his mental imagery of Severus nibbling and kissing his throat last night, Harry’s fingers in his hair as he caressed Harry’s spine, at Remus’ gentle question. Severus was watching him, waiting for the danger signs. 

“No-nothing,” he muttered, feeling the blush heat his face. He daren’t look Severus in the eye. How on earth would he explain to his parents that he was smiling because Severus had made him feel pleasure last night?

“Okay, you don‘t have to tell us, I was just curious. It’s just nice to see you smile again.”

“Oh. Well, I seem to be doing it a lot these past few days.” He paused. No time like the present. “Remus?”

“Yes, pup?” Remus asked as he accepted the tea from Severus.

“I’ve made a decision about the baby.”

All eyes were on him and Harry could feel the heat of Severus as the man moved to stand behind him, the reassuring touch on his shoulder ghost-like. To Harry’s quiet shock, Sirius didn’t seem to want to decapitate Severus for touching him. Strange, those two seemed to be getting along awfully well. Maybe they had reached a truce of some kind. Oh right, everyone staring at him, waiting for his decision.

He took a deep breath and mentally reminded himself to stay calm, to not stutter if he could help it. 

“Um, well, you see…I…ah…”

“Harry,” Sirius interrupted. “Whatever your decision, we’re all behind you.”

That made it a lot easier for Harry to speak. He quickly checked that no one was still holding their mug. “I’m keeping it.”

“Are you sure that’s what you want?” Remus asked after a moment of shocked silence, his eyes searching Harry’s and then Severus’. 

That was odd too, Remus was looking to Severus for reassurance about Harry, as if he trusted that Severus had not coerced him. Something was definitely up.

“I’m sure. I want it. It’s mine, it doesn’t matter about Lu-Lucius, all that matters is that it’s mine.” He still had a little trouble getting that name out. His hands rested on his slight bump and he let his eyes fall upon it too. “It’s my baby.”

“He,” Remus said quietly, making Harry look up in surprise at him. Severus slowly reclaimed his seat, sitting lightly in case of the need to rush back to Harry’s side.

“What?” Harry asked.

“The baby. It’s a boy.”

“How do you know?”

“My research.”

“Oh Circe, here we go again,” Sirius groaned, earning a slap on the arm from his spouse. He chuckled slightly “Arthur dropped off the material he found on what you are just after we visited the first time. Remy has been going through it for days, bestowing me with various little tidbits.”

“How is Arthur?” Harry asked, Sirius taking over the conversation as Remus dug out an extortionate amount of paper from his bag.

“He seems to be holding up. He’s doing well, keeping the Aurors busy. Amazing, really, the sheer amount of stuff he managed to dig up, and get it out without being caught. Really incredible.”

“Why incredible?”

“Well, before we learned about you, we had never even heard of one, not a magical one anyways. We never knew the rumours of Dumbledore’s mother, or the Dark Lord‘s. We had no idea, any of us, of all the things the Ministry know about your kind. Plus, this is Arthur we’re talking about. He’s smuggled things out of the Ministry. He’s guilt ridden.”

“Well, reassure him that Muggle officials nick things from the office all the time, might help. He might actually feel proud of himself for this. What have you learned?” Harry asked as Remus plonked the last small stack of papers on the table. He could see Remus and Sirius searching his face for panic but he felt surprisingly calm. He found that he really was interested.

“Well, there is a Legend…” Remus began.

“I don’t like that word,” Harry interrupted swiftly, trying not to let his mind force him back. His calm was rapidly fading. Too rapidly.

Oh God, he couldn’t breathe.

“No one will find you, my little legend.”

He felt himself falling off of the chair, landing in a warm embrace. It was the same as that first morning, those strong arms wrapped lightly around him, the calm breathing forcing him to follow it, that deep voice in his ear.

“Breathe with me, Harry. Come on, just breathe. In and out, slow and steady. Slowly. It’s all right, Harry. You’re here, in my house. You’re not there anymore, you’re here, you’re safe. You’re safe here with me, I won’t let anything happen to you.”

He opened his eyes. He was in the kitchen, not in that room. Severus held him safe, not Lucius approaching the bed. He was safe.

He let Severus help him back to his chair and gripped Remus’ fingers gently, looking shakily at Sirius. 

“It’s okay, guys, I’m okay now. Just don’t use that word,” Harry reassured.

“Sorry, pup,” Remus said.

“It’s okay, you weren’t to know. Carry on, please, I want to know what you’ve learned.”

Remus took a deep breath and Harry could see his hands tremble as they reached to straighten the stack of paper, see Sirius’ tremble as he reached for a pawn, his fathers trying to act like it was an everyday occurrence to see their son nearly pass out. In Harry’s opinion they were doing a pretty fair job of it, and he was impressed by how well they had handled their first real taste of his panic.

“Well, in this…er…fable, it claims that the first child you have will be a boy. Your child is male, according to this.”

“Dumbledore is male, as was the Dark Lord, so I think we can safely assume it is accurate,” Severus interjected, standing protectively behind Harry. Sirius looked up at him and silently moved to Severus’ chair, turning the board so he could continue the game. Remus moved up to Sirius’ seat, pulling his papers to him. Severus sat down in Remus’ chair with a quiet ‘thank you’ to Sirius and Remus. They played a game of musical mugs as tea was passed to its respective drinker. Harry scooted his chair closer to Severus and gripped at the mans thigh, Severus’ hand rubbing reassuring circles on his back.

Amazing. Not even a single dirty look from Sirius. Maybe they’d been bewitched or something.

Remus sifted through the mountain of parchment, pulling out what looked like an official Ministry decree.

“Did Arthur steal that?” Severus asked, his voice slightly impressed.

“No, this is a duplicate. He made quite a few of them, hoping maybe I could piece together centuries old legislation. He couldn’t take the older ones, so he made copies. He did actually bring me some genuine ones that had been written in the last century or so. Now, this decree states that you are ‘owned’, but I’m guessing you knew about that part already. It’s pretty cut and dry but there is a loophole, though it’s complicated,” Remus explained.

“A loophole? You mean I could be freed?” Harry asked.

“Yes. There are two ways to do it but I’m not sure how eager you’ll be to do either.”

Harry felt a sudden hope rise within him, something that only happened when he had Severus’ physical contact, making him forget about Lucius with his touch, with his kisses. He knew Severus could feel the change in him and decided to test his boundaries a little. He slipped his hands a little higher, just a tad, just a bit closer to the mans crotch. He felt Severus’ hand on his back still for a fraction of a second before it continued on its circular path, the older mans face giving away nothing. Wonderful thing, years of being a spy. A momentary glance at Remus, the man still fumbling with bits of parchment, trying to find the right one and organise himself. 

Severus’ thigh was warm under his hands, and he didn’t feel the revulsion he had thought he would. ‘This isn’t so bad,’ he thought to himself. Severus’ hand slipped from his back and came down to gently pull Harry’s pale hands away, holding both of them in his one hand, calmly taking a sip of his tea. 

“Well, the first option,” Remus said, pulling Harry’s attention away from Severus for the time being. Remus was scanning a piece of parchment. This one looked official too. “This says that if you remain away from your…um…” The man faltered, looking at Severus. “Which words should I not use?”

Ah, a slip in the pretend ignoring of the panic attack.

“Harry, cover your ears,” Severus ordered. Harry covered his ears and watched as the mute conversation took place, his eyes wandering to land on his godfather. Draco and Sirius both seemed determined to win the game of chess, the too complicated strategies making the moves come hard and fast, the speedy game play making Harry slightly dizzy. He felt a light tap on his hand and he let them fall, slipping them back into Severus’ hand.

“Right,” Remus began again, a look of determination on his face. “This says that if you remain away from your subjugator for a period of no less than three years then he will automatically lose his legal standing over you.”

“Three years?” Harry asked. He couldn’t stay hidden for that long, it couldn’t be physically possible. Mind you, Sirius had done it for nearly that long.

“Yes, and not a single day less. This states that he must not even see you for that period, so effectively you couldn’t leave the house. He could claim that he spotted you at a bus stop or something.”

“I think that is a very limiting option,” Severus added. “There must be another?”

“Well, there is option two, but you won’t like it.”

“What is option two?” Harry asked warily. Severus laid his other hand over his suddenly freezing extremities.

“Option two is called an ‘Overriding Claim’.” The man took a sip of tea, glancing at Sirius. “This legislation states that if another wizard of legal age…claims you, then he will take…um…”

“Lu…Lucius,” Harry supplied. “It’s okay, I don’t mind you saying that one. I can deal with that one, just don’t say it to often.”

Remus’ face held a look of relief and he allowed a brief smile to cross his lips. “Right. Well, if another wizard of legal age claims you then he will take Lucius’ place as your subjugator. The second wizard would have control.”

Harry was confused. Claimed? What the hell was claiming? “What do you mean, ‘claim’ me?”

“It means to be intimate,” Severus supplied gently.

Oh. That. “Is there any other way?”

“I’m afraid not. Those are the only two that I can find.”

“But what’s to stop me being transferred from wizard to wizard to wizard for the rest of my life? Is that what I’m doomed to, a life of being someone’s…toy?” Harry asked, his panic rising once more.

“There is a way to stop that from happening,” Remus supplied, trying to help, but Harry could no longer hear him. 

Opinions of his fathers be damned, he needed it, he needed it now. The memories were starting to flood in, starting to take control. He stood up and walked from the room, up the stairs and into Severus’ bedroom. He sat on the bed and waited. He had to come, he had to.

Sure enough, there he was, Harry’s own personal hero. Severus was kneeling before him, forcing him to look at him. Harry’s white-knuckled hands reached out, threading through the inky hair. Harry felt Severus let him pull him forward until he was kissing Severus, the older man taking over.

Severus’ lips were gentle, his hands moving, one laying on the base of his spine, the other on the gentle swell of his pregnancy. Harry tentatively licked Severus’ lips. The older man moaned slightly and returned the gentle caress with his own tongue, swiping it across Harry’s, letting Harry’s into his mouth, letting Harry take control.

Harry broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against Severus’.

“I didn’t think it wise to calm myself that way with them watching,” Harry whispered.

“Probably not.” Severus waited for the seemingly unconnected conversation that usually followed these bouts of Harry calming himself with kisses. Severus had to admit, it was a really enjoyable way of being used by Harry to help himself regain his composure.

“What the hell happened to them? Sirius seems almost like he accepts you in my life.”

There it was, a question seemingly out of nowhere, not really leading anywhere, absolutely nothing to do with his panic. Severus had come to understand that Harry said the first thing that popped into his head during these moments of conquering his anxiety. Harry’s fingertips were stroking the back of his neck, sending shivers down Severus’ spine.

“He accepts that I am caring for you, he trusts me to help you get back to your old self, or something near it. He seems to realize that you need me. However, I’m not sure he would take kindly to this way of you calming yourself,” Severus said, his voice amused by the end.

“You talked to them, didn’t you? You explained it all. That‘s why they‘re so calm with you touching me.”

Another random thought escaping Harry’s mouth. This one was actually connected to the current topic. Harry was regaining his control.

“I laid down the ground rules for them to follow when around you. I did so when you had that panic and hid in the bathroom during their first visit.”

Harry groaned. “Severus, I don’t want that to be my life. I don’t want to be a plaything for wizard after wizard.”

Ah, the real problem. Calm Harry was running the show again. 

“Do you really think I would let anyone take you from me where you didn’t want to go?” Severus added a look that plainly said ‘Harry, you’re having an unintelligent moment.’

Harry giggled slightly at the look before he kissed Severus once more and then the two of them made their way back downstairs, resuming their seats.

“I’m okay now. What were you saying Remus, I didn’t catch the last bit,” Harry said calmly, though he gripped Severus’ hands.

Remus looked uncertain for a moment before he responded. “There is a way around you being the continual object of endless claims. You could marry someone.”

Sirius actually tore his eyes away from the game at this point. “Excuse me? You never mentioned that bit when you were babbling about this, Remus,” Sirius said, Remus looking at him incredulously.

“I ‘never mentioned that bit’? Babbling? Sirius, I told you at breakfast yesterday, at lunch, dinner, before bed, and this morning! See? I knew it, you never listen. And I don‘t babble, I inform.” 

“Remus, come on, I do listen. It’s just you’ve been going on about this for days, I just tuned out for a bit. And I know you don’t babble, it was just a bad word choice,” Sirius said, a tone of pleading in his voice.

Remus turned his back on Sirius with a look that plainly said ‘you’ll pay for this later’ and continued on, Sirius returning to his game with a resigned sigh. Harry smirked.

“If you were to marry someone then, legally, you would be, what is that phrase? Ah yes, ‘off the menu’, so to speak. It would be illegal for anyone but your husband to claim you if you were married. They would land themselves in Azkaban if they touched you. However, there is a problem with this solution to that particular problem.”

“What problem?” Harry asked.

“Well, the way to get married is the problem. For you to marry you must be free of Lucius first, or he could dispute the marriage. So, again, you would need to either stay hidden for three years or choose another to claim you before the marriage. Saying that, there is a piece of good news. No matter who you belong to your child cannot be legally obtained by anyone without your permission. Lucius has no ruling over him, even if he owns you. Because of the ease with which your subservience can be obtained any child you bear will always be the legal child of you and no other, regardless of your owner. I’m sorry, pup, but that really is the best news.”

Harry couldn’t believe how limited his options were. At least no one could take his baby from him. A numbness spread through his body as his mind worked. Stay hidden for three years. He couldn’t do that. Never take his child to the park, never walk down a street for fear of being seen, never go to Diagon Alley? Three years of staying inside four walls? He liked Spinners End but he was already starting to feel a slight cabin fever. Harry tossed that option out. He wouldn‘t hide.

All right, the second option. Could he do that? Was he ready? Let someone claim him, let someone override Lucius’ hold on him? The thought of it had a strange notion entering his mind. ‘Don’t I already do that, though? Don’t I let Severus do that?’

His second master needn’t be like his first, his second was of his choosing. 

Severus.

Harry let his mind supply him with memories of the mans gentle sweeping touch, his careful kisses, his gentle building of Harry‘s pleasure, managing to always make him moan, even if it went no further than that. He let it travel to imaginings of what Severus would be like if he took him, his mind giving him a gentle seduction to think about. He already knew Severus would never hurt him, he knew the man loved him.

But could he let himself be touched like that? Could he bear to attempt it?

He let his mind go blank, turning back to his companions. The rest of the visit went very smoothly after that. Remus and Severus regaled Harry with tales of their own days at Hogwarts, surprising Harry with the information that the two of them had been study buddies for their first few years. But then things had changed, Sirius and James had claimed Remus’ time and Severus had found it easier to concentrate when alone. Severus quietly added that he had withdrawn from social interactions when Solarin was born, round about the end of his third year.

Harry was beginning to realize how much Severus had done for the girl. How much he had done for him.

He was falling deeper into these feelings for the man.

“Yes!” Sirius yelled triumphantly, Draco shaking his head, his mouth hung open in amazement. 

“Tough luck, Draco. Maybe you can beat him next time,” Harry consoled. He too was secretly amazed that Draco had lost. He had always lost to Draco in the games they had played while here, but, then again, he was a terrible player.

“Yeah, maybe,” Draco agreed dazedly. He was snapped out of his stupor as Sirius reached out his hand to shake in friendly competition. Harry watched as Draco stuck both of his hands under the table.

Sirius looked confused and hurt. “Draco does not like being touched,” Severus said calmly. Sirius nodded. He looked around the table and settled for pushing the last of the biscuits towards the blonde. Draco smiled shyly and accepted a cookie as his losers compensation.

“Sirius,” Severus said calmly. “Solarin asked me in her letter to relay her apologies once again. She did not mean to lose her temper like that.”

Sirius sighed and then, to Harry’s utter amazement, he nodded, actually shaking Severus’ hand in acceptance. ‘Doesn’t that mean there’s like an apocalypse or something on its way?’ Harry questioned silently. In the end he decided this new development was for the best and let it slide.

The day drew to a close and Harry let Sirius and Remus hug him before they left, reassuring them that he would be fine with them telling Molly and Arthur about the baby. 

Then Draco went upstairs to shower before dinner and he and Severus were alone.

“Severus?” Harry asked, gathering all of his Gryffindor courage.

“Yes?” Severus replied, gathering the used mugs and plates and depositing them in the sink. Harry stood behind him and wrapped his arms around the man, his forehead resting against his spine.

“Will you claim me?” he whispered, the man stiffening in his arms. He loosened his hold and Severus turned round to face him.

“Is that what you want?”

“Don’t you want to?” Harry asked, his courage slipping, suddenly uncertain. What he really wanted to ask was ‘don’t you want me’, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to ask it aloud.

“Harry, I want to more than I can tell you, I want you. But are you sure?”

“Yes. I don’t know when I’ll be ready to have you claim me but I want it to be you. I want to be yours.”

Severus sighed, pulling Harry into his arms, settling his head atop the smaller figures. “You know, I keep finding myself wondering what on earth I did that was amazingly wonderful enough to deserve you. You’re too good for me,” Severus admitted quietly. “Why on earth would you want me to be the one to touch you like that?”

“Because I forget.”

“What do you mean?”

“When you kiss me, when you touch me, I forget. I forget about him, about what he did. I think of no one else but you, the way you make me feel. Your touch is distracting.” Harry faltered but determination made him carry on. “I know sex isn’t supposed to be like that, like the way he made it, but it’s hard to believe it. But when you touch me, I do believe. The way you make me feel, it’s so much better than I ever thought it could be. I never thought I’d ever enjoy having someone touch me, even before. But I do. I want you to be the one to show me how good it can be.”

Severus pulled him tighter to his chest, Harry feeling those strong arms encase him further. “I love you.”

Harry smiled at the whispered admission. “I love you, too.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Sirius and Remus landed in their kitchen to find Molly and Arthur sitting gravely at their table with Albus. Bill and Charlie Weasley were leaning side by side against the kitchen counters, Charlie sporting a spectacular black eye.

“Hope you saved some of him for us, Charlie,” Sirius joked, Remus elbowing him in the ribs. “What happened?” he asked.

“Lucius took it upon himself to track down my sons. He seemed to think that we would stash Harry with one of them for safe keeping,” Arthur said wearily.

“Why would he think that? We don‘t have Harry,” Remus asked, feigning innocence, looking at Albus accusingly.

“You can drop the act, Remus. Albus told us everything,” Bill interrupted. “We know Harry was rescued. We know what he is, what happened to him and where he is.”

“Albus!” Sirius exclaimed angrily.

“It was for the best. We couldn’t lie to them, Sirius. Lucius revealed too much to them,” Albus placated. 

Sirius and Remus sat down at the table, the two younger men joining them. “What did he reveal?” Remus asked.

“He told us a few choice snippets of Harry’s time with him,” Charlie said quietly, his eyes fixed on the glass of Firewhisky in his hands.

“It was either obliviate them or tell them. They are not a threat to Harry’s safety, I can assure you,” Arthur guaranteed, the two men sighing in defeat.

“Lucius is starting to become dangerous, even more so than before. We’re unsure what has prompted the sudden change but it is clear that we can no longer let this situation continue the way it has been. We need to change things before Harry’s safety, and that of all concerned, becomes a real issue. We need to act now,” Albus said.

“How does this work, the two of them suddenly disappearing?” Remus asked.

“I’ve been given compassionate leave from Gringotts. Once Lucius left my office I told the goblins I had a family emergency and needed some time away. They have granted me an indefinite absence, paid leave,” Bill said calmly. “I’m free for the foreseeable future.”

“What about you, Charlie? How are you going to explain your absence?” Remus asked.

“I quit,” Charlie replied smoothly, though his hands trembled still. The other men gaped at him but Molly’s eyes remained fixed on the wood of the table. “I was growing tired of dragon taming anyway. It was a high risk job for lousy pay which meant that I was too far away from home for too long. Nah, not for me anymore, I think. Maybe I’ll turn my hand to writing research books on dragons or something. I don’t actually know yet, but I’ve got some money put away. It’ll last me until I get myself sorted.”

Remus had to admire the younger men, they had acted immediately. In fact, they had acted a little too fast, a little too smooth. “This was planned, wasn’t it?”

“During the war, when he came back, we put our plans in place. According to You-Know-Who, we were the biggest blood traitors out there. We were likely targets. We needed a way to be able to be where we were needed when the time came. I guess forward thinking finally came in handy,” Bill said with a wry smile.

“So, what do we all do now, Albus? Who else is he likely to target?” Charlie asked.

“Assuming he is going by who Harry is closest to, the rest of the Weasley brood is a likely assumption. Seeing as he was removed from the board of Governors at Hogwarts when his Death Eater activities were revealed, and Draco is no longer at the school, we can rest assured that Ron and Ginny are safe, though we should implement a quick escape plan for them. We may need to remove them from the school at a moments notice. I will ask Minerva to keep a close eye on them,” Albus rationalised. “The next likely target is Hermione. I will include her in our escape plan for the other two. Percy is unlikely to be a target, Lucius is aware of the familial rift, I’m sure of it, but I will owl him to be wary of Lucius. I will word it so it seems that these are completely unfounded accusations. I shall also visit Fred and George in Diagon Alley, warn them of Lucius. I will be discreet and keep them unaware of Harry’s return.”

“Thank you, Albus,” Molly said. 

Her voice was shaky and Remus could understand exactly how she felt. To feel that your child was in danger was one of the worst things he had memory of experiencing. Molly had several children, her worry must have been at a fever pitch.

“What about Harry? Is he safe where he is?” she asked.

“Perfectly. Severus is more than capable of handling anything Lucius could throw at him. He has already begun to put together their escape route, should it come to it. He has been preparing for the worst since Harry was liberated. Harry is in very capable hands.”

“We know that, we witnessed it today. Severus is taking very good care of our boy, isn’t he, Siri?” Remus interjected.

“Snape seems to be doing his job well. Harry is fine where he is,” Sirius admitted. He and Remus were perfectly safe, having left the Fidelius charm on 12 Grimmauld Place intact with Albus still the Secret Keeper. They had originally meant to remove it but had let it fall down their to-do lists; they were thankful for that fact. Harry and Severus could move in with them if they needed. 

“What happens when Lucius discovers who it is that Harry is with?” Bill asked.

“Then it will only be a matter of time before he gets inside Spinners End,” Albus said sadly. “While Lucius is still in his current state I see no reason to move the three of them to a safer location. However, if Lucius starts to become a bigger issue then we may be forced to.”

“Let’s cross that bridge if and when we come to it,” Remus said quietly. “Harry doesn’t need a new reason to panic, he has enough of them already.”

Silence ruled the room as the guests gazed at him curiously. Remus felt Sirius’ hand slip into his own under the table, his skin smooth and warm, reassuring.

“What about the girl?” Sirius asked, distracting them all from Remus‘ statement.

“Which girl are you referring to?” Albus asked, his blue eyes betraying his relief at the change of subject.

“Snape’s sister, the aggy thingy one.”

“Ah, Solarin.”

Remus saw Bill’s attention focus on Albus. The younger man had been looking at his mother, his attention only barely on the conversation. The curse breaker suddenly looked stunned.

“Solarin Prince?” Bill asked, a sudden light in his eyes.

“Yes, though she goes as Solarin Snape now,” Albus replied. “You were at Hogwarts at the same time, were you not?”

“I was the year above. She was a Slytherin.” The redhead paused, obviously selecting his words carefully. “We were friends, despite the difference in Houses.”

“I remember her now. She came to visit you at the Burrow one afternoon, the summer before your sixth year. I knew I’d met her before,” Arthur interjected.

“Yes. Everyone called her Solly. Solly Prince. We lost contact just after Hogwarts. She’s related to Snape?”

“His baby sister,” Remus supplied and, to the surprise of all, Bill began to laugh. It took a few moments for the wizard to compose himself, though his smile lingered.

“No wonder. I should have guessed. Now I come to think of it, she did look like him. Those dark eyes, that dark hair. She was always getting amazing grades in Potions. None of us could figure out how she was so good at the damn subject. Makes perfect sense now, with him for a brother,” Bill explained, all the other wizards breaking into smiles. Molly even managed a weak grin. “Is she in danger?”

“Not to my knowledge. However, if Lucius turns his attentions to Severus as the one hiding Harry then we should consider moving her to a safer location,” Albus mused.

“Where is she now?”

“Muggle London. She has lived there since she was eighteen.”

“She left the Wizarding World?” Bill asked, but Remus noticed he displayed only a light interest in the answer. Maybe Bill knew more of this particular witch than he was letting on. He took the decision to leave it be for the time being.

“Yes, though no one quite knows why. It is of no matter. She is a powerful enough witch to take on Lucius,” Albus replied, his tone light.

“But Bill’s a curse breaker. If Lucius beat him in a fight then what makes you think Solarin will fare any better?” Remus asked. Severus was helping his son, the least they could do was to protect the mans sister. Merlin, Harry had even smiled at them all today, though he had no idea for the reason behind the dreamy grin. Severus deserved their utmost admiration and respect.

“Solarin has her own defences,” Bill supplied. Remus felt Sirius shudder next to him.

“Still, one of us should check in on her, let her know what’s happened so that she can be prepared,” Remus suggested.

“Agreed. Solarin will need to be on her guard. Lucius knows who she is, he could assume that she is helping us in Harry’s recovery. He could seek her out and attempt to force some information out of her. She should be warned,” Albus approved. 

“Me and Remus can go,” Sirius supplied and Remus watched the glimmer of disappointment that flickered across Bill’s face. Something was missing in this scene. Something else was going on. Bill was definitely hiding something.

“That seems reasonable. I shall talk to Severus tomorrow, appraise him of the situation. He will probably know where Solarin is, Muggle London is, after all, a very big place for her to hide in.” Albus momentarily looked his age. It only lasted a moment before his twinkle was back in place. “So, how is Harry?”

Remus allowed himself a smile. “He’s not so jumpy, though he did have his moments still. He really seems to be doing well. He even smiled today.”

“Really?” Molly asked, her attention finally fixed on the conversation. Charlie moved from the table to fix everyone drinks and replenish his own alcohol. “That’s a good sign, right?”

“It was certainly encouraging. Snape seems to be getting somewhere with him. His hug was a little tighter than the one at the end of last visit, and positively rib crunching compared to the first,” Sirius joked. He glanced at Remus, his uncertainty clear in his blue eyes. Remus decided to take pity on his husband. Sirius still wasn’t as good at social situations as he was before his imprisonment, and delivering potentially bad news was a tricky area for the Pureblood.

“We have some news for you all,” Remus began, feeling under the spotlight when all attentions fell on him. There were suddenly five pairs of eyes fixed on him and it made him nervous. No, he told Harry they would tell them all for him. He was going to say it, whether he wanted to or not.

Remus cleared his throat. “Harry returned to us in a rather more…delicate condition than we had originally thought. During our first visit he told us that he is pregnant.”

He tried not to laugh as even Albus’ jaw dropped. He could feel Sirius shake in silent hidden laughter beside him and that just made it harder to keep a straight face.

“That’s new,” Bill deadpanned and Remus suddenly saw the influence the Snape girl had weaved on him in his youth. This was getting more and more intriguing, and Remus just itched to try and solve the puzzle.

“Indeed,” Albus said. Remus bit the inside of his cheek at the shock on the old wizards face. It occurred to him that he had never seen this reaction in the man before and he felt slightly chuffed to have caused it.

“Well…uhh…” Arthur tried. Charlie didn’t look like he could even form a thought, let alone a coherent sentence. He had stopped dead in his preparation of drinks, water overflowing from the glass he was still continually pouring into from his wand, the clear liquid trickling off the draining board and into the sink.

“That’s an interesting development. Has he given thought to what he wants to do about it?” Molly asked. Remus found he wasn’t surprised that she was the first to regain her cool. Having so many children made her virtually unshakable, especially with Fred and George around.

“Yes, he made a decision and told us of it today. He has chosen to keep the child.” He watched as Arthur made a move to protest but interrupted him. “Listen, it has taken a lot for Harry to reach this decision, and we may not like that he is carrying the son of a Death Eater and rapist but it is his decision. As far as I’m concerned, it’s Harry’s child, no one else, and that is what matters. He is made his decision and I’m with him all the way.”

Only Sirius’ thumb stroking across the back of his hand kept him from completely losing it at the man. The full moon was only a week away, making him cranky and irritable all of a sudden.

“If you can’t accept our sons decision then I ask that you please leave and don‘t come back until you can. Harry is finally healing, I can finally see something of the boy he used to be. I won’t have anyone ruin that, not after he worked so hard for it. We won’t let you cause him to fill with doubt again because you can’t accept this,” Sirius continued.

The conversation ground to a halt at that moment, Arthur clearly wanting to argue back but Albus and Molly both shot him quelling looks and he kept his mouth shut. The seven inhabitants of the room looked around at each other, weighing up the options. It was Charlie who broke the silence.

“If it’s what Harry wants, so be it,” the redhead said firmly, earning a shocked look from his father.

Albus, Molly and Bill all voiced their agreement with the dragon tamer, but Albus felt it necessary to end the evening there. Molly dragged her husband through the floo, her sons following her out after muttering their apologies for their father. Albus assured the two men that he would try and reason with Arthur if he didn’t come around before he too took his leave. 

Sirius and Remus stood in the kitchen, taking in the days events.

“I won’t let this be ruined by Arthur, Remus,” Sirius admitted after nearly a full hour of silence, the two of them having polished off almost a full bottle of Muggle vodka between them and now sitting unsteadily at the table.

“We won’t let him, Sirius. This is what Harry wants.” 

Remus hated to admit it to himself but he kind of agreed with Arthur’s need to protest. He didn’t like the method of conception of Harry’s child, and he found the thought of Harry raising the child of a Death Eater and rapist didn’t settle well with him. But it was Harry’s choice. Maybe he would feel differently once the babe put in an appearance. He found himself briefly amused at the fact that he trusted an ex-Death Eater spy with Harry’s safety, when an ex-Death Eater had hurt him and he let out a drunken giggle, despite the topic of conversation. Sirius didn’t seem to notice the laugh.

“And we’re going to give him everything he wants,” Sirius said, waving the bottle at him, his voice slightly slurred.

“Maybe not everything, Siri. Everything within reason sounds better.”

Sirius snorted at him. “You have a point there,” he said, pointing the bottle at Remus. The Animagus sighed. “I still don’t like Snape around him.”

Remus smirked. Sirius really did never change. He hadn’t liked Severus around Remus when they were in school either. “I know. But I must say that you handled yourself beautifully today. I think Harry really believed your act,” Remus encouraged. Maybe if Sirius spent enough time pretending to like Severus he would find it to be true. Well, as true as could be possible between the two of them.

“I did it for Harry’s sake. And I can’t say that I’m thrilled about this theory of yours.”

No, of course Sirius wouldn’t be. But it was better than the alternative, wasn’t it? “I know you’re not, but think about it, Sirius. Harry trusts Severus. He is doing more than using him as an anchor now. Think about it. Our options are limited. If Harry doesn’t allow himself to be claimed he will have to hide for the next three years. And if he’s claimed he can enter into a marriage, ensuring his safety. Consider it, Sirius. Harry being free from constant threat of rape.”

“And you trust Snape not to rape him?” Sirius asked honestly.

“Yes, I do. I don’t think Severus has ever been like this, not to my recollection anyway. It’s as if he’s a completely different person. I trust him with Harry. That’s all I need right now. Thinking too deep into it only leads me to want to do some painful things to Lucius Malfoy.” Sirius smirked, raising his glass in salute of that plan. Remus took a deep breath. “Sirius, I don’t much like the idea of Harry having to be claimed, of him having to put himself through that just to be safe, but I like it a damn sight more than leaving him under the control of Malfoy. And if he must be claimed, it must be someone of his choice. He will chose Severus to claim him, I’m sure of it. Better to start accepting now. It’ll make it easier.”

There was a long silence between the two, Remus watching with an air of indifference as Sirius’ face betrayed his thoughts. Sirius was easy enough to handle, if you knew how. Remus had years of experience under his belt, giving him an advantage over the easily manipulated ex-Gryffindor.

“Doesn’t mean I have to like it,” Sirius grumbled, polishing off the last of the vodka.

“No, it doesn’t. It just means that you have to accept that Harry is a big boy now…kind of.” He frowned at himself. Maybe the vodka was getting to him. “Anyway, he is old enough to make his own decisions about this.”

“When did you become the rational parent?”

“About the time you became the possessive one.”

“Oi! You cheeky beggar! I am not possessive!” Sirius half yelled, but he was grinning as he replied.

“Are too. You are the possessive one. And I love you for it,” Remus argued back, his own smile wide as he got to his feet, a little unsteady.

“Good. You know, I think it’s about time for bed. I’m knackered.”

“What a good suggestion,” Remus replied, pulling Sirius to his feet and claiming his lips.

They moved to the bedroom and ended up laughing at each other as they struggled to strip down, the alcohol affecting them more than they had first thought it had. They finally giggled their way into bed, laying facing each other.

“You know, I think young Bill has a few secrets,” Remus said.

“What about?” Sirius said distractedly, running his fingers over the bite mark scar on Remus’ arm that marked him as a werewolf.

“Solarin. He knows more than he’s letting on. He was barely interested in her living in the Muggle World. It was as if he already knew. And he was disappointed when you suggested we be the ones to go and talk to her.”

“Is this one of those times where you tell me I should have kept my big mouth shut?” Sirius asked jokingly.

Remus pushed against his shoulder, allowing his inebriation to take over momentarily and make him laugh at Sirius’ childish tone. “No, not this time. I’m just saying that I think something went on between the two of them. Albus said they were at Hogwarts together, and Bill admitted they were friends, though he took his time deciding to call their relationship friendly. Maybe they were more than that.”

“Have you found yourself another project to attack, my little bookworm?” Sirius said with a sly sort of smile.

“Oh shut it. You wouldn’t like me half as much if I wasn’t so into my puzzles and my books,” Remus said defensively.

“Good point, love. I wouldn’t. I like you just the way you are,” Sirius said, letting his fingers wander, Remus arching immediately under his touch, his own need growing too fast for him to stop it.

They let themselves give into their drunken need, Sirius giving up the battle and letting his wolf play alpha and dominate him. Remus knew that Sirius would never admit it, but he liked it when he was like this, all half crazed and animalistic just before the moon took her sway.

When it was over, when they had cast cleaning charms and some of their intoxication had worn off, Sirius kissed Remus’ sweat slicked shoulder, claiming his attention for one more point to discuss before sleep claimed them.

“That was weird with Draco, wasn’t it? The way he doesn’t like being touched, it is odd right? It’s not just me?” Sirius asked.

“It is odd, love, and I don’t think it’s just you. But I’m sure Severus can handle it. Stop worrying and go to sleep. We’re going shopping tomorrow,” Remus replied sleepily. He lay there waiting for his words to sink in. 

Three…two…one… 

“Shopping? What for?” Sirius asked, his voice suddenly worried.

“Baby things for Harry.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Charlie watched as his mother slammed her fists down on the table, his father shrinking into his chair in fear. They had been hashing this out for hours, his father refusing to relent.

“You will not interfere, Arthur!” Molly yelled.

“How can they let this happen, Molly? How can they let Harry subject himself to that?” Arthur countered.

“Dad,” Charlie intervened, finally taking pity on his father, feeling his own fatigue but wanting to watch the fireworks still. “Put Ginny in Harry’s place.” His father paled slightly, his eyes narrowing. “Would you really force Ginny to give up a child? Would you really force her into anything if she had been through what Harry has suffered?”

His father seemed to deflate. “It’s wrong. He’s just a child,” Arthur reasoned. “He’s too young to understand what a responsibility being a parent is. He’s too young to have to deal with this. Why should he, if he doesn’t have to?”

“He is not a child anymore, Arthur,” his mother cut in, her voice softer. She sat down heavily opposite her husband, taking his hands in her own. Charlie knew his mother wanted to treat Harry like he was eleven years old still, and he was impressed by her calm measured handling of the situation. ‘Must be experiences of us shocking her’ he thought. 

“He is sixteen and has been through more than any of us could ever begin to understand. I appreciate your upset at Ron and Hermione being careless, getting themselves into the responsibility of parenthood but Harry wasn’t careless. He did not choose this, dear, but he is choosing his path now. No one has forced him into keeping the child, he has reached this decision on his own. He is not a child, Arthur. He stopped being one the moment that man forced himself on him,” Molly said firmly.

Arthur looked around the room and he seemed to Charlie to appear unexpectedly older than he had ever thought his father could look.

“I will respect Harry’s decision. I don’t agree with it and I don’t like it but I will go along with it. You are right, this is his choice and it would be wrong of any of us to force him to do anything. Damn what Malfoy says, we’re better than that bigot Pureblood,” Arthur said wearily, the closest Charlie had ever heard his father come to snapping over Lucius‘ comments about their purity.

The night drew to a close and Charlie found himself sharing with Bill in the twins old room. He could have taken any of his other brothers empty rooms but he found that neither of them wanted to be alone just yet, not after what Lucius had told them.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Severus felt the bed dip with Harry’s slight weight, the younger man slipping into his arms. Harry had closed the door behind him as he came back from relieving his bladder, an organ Harry said the baby took sadistic delight in kicking. The room had been plunged into darkness.

“Severus.”

“Yes, Harry?”

“I want you to touch me.”

Severus froze momentarily, his cock twitching minutely. He took a deep breath, gaining restraint over his self-neglected libido. “Excuse me?” he said gently.

“I want you to touch me.”

“Harry, I know you said you wanted me to claim you this afternoon but there is no rush, love. We’re taking this at a pace you can handle.”

He heard Harry chuckle. “I know that. I just want…I want to know what I’m okay with at the moment. I want to know how far I can go.”

“Ah, I see. I understand now.” He paused. “So, what would you have me do?”

“Can we light the lamp? I want to see you. I don’t want anything in the dark,” Harry replied after a moments thought. Severus got the impression that Harry had not expected him to agree so easily. Severus rolled away from the adolescent figure and flicked on the bedside lamp, the dim bulb bathing the room in a faint warm orange glow.

“You lead the way, Harry,” Severus encouraged softly, looking at the thin face bathed in the warm light. There was no trace of panic in the impossibly young face but Severus knew all too well that, with Harry, it could all change in an instant. Harry’s eyes raked his body.

“I want to see you,” Harry whispered. 

Severus sat up, pulling Harry with him and arranging them so Harry was sat facing him, the two of them cross-legged. He slowly unbuttoned the fastenings at his throat and wrists, pulling off the worn nightshirt. He dropped it to the floor, his attention focussed on Harry. He decided that, for now, it would be best to leave his black silk boxers in place.

Harry’s hands moved from his own knees to Severus’, letting them travel slowly up the older mans thighs, the small hands shaking slightly. Severus put the small tremors down to nerves and decided to ignore them unless they got worse. 

Harry’s touch was ghost-like and he felt himself respond accordingly, his blood rushing south.

Harry looked at the slim man, the flesh now bared for him. His body was different to Lucius’, more lean, more lithe strength than actual muscle. He let his hands travel up the supple thighs, feeling the dark hair beneath his fingers. He knew his hands were trembling but he wasn’t quite sure why. He supposed it must just be because he was testing his boundaries as he found he wasn‘t really all that nervous, his trust in Severus taking over.

He pulled his hands back down, letting them travel to the larger hands of his companion. The mans fingertips were surprisingly smooth, not calloused like he had always thought they would be after years of working with hot cauldrons. The supple feel of the hands still surprised him after all the times they had touched him. He let his fingers trail up and trace the faded Dark Mark on his forearm, watching the man, observing him for any sign that this area was off limits. Apparently, no area was and the idea that this man would just sit there and let him explore all of him filled him with a new confidence.

He slid his hands higher, resting them on the strong shoulders and pulling the man forward into a kiss, feeling the safe hands come to rest lightly on his ribs. A new area he deemed safe as of that moment. 

He broke the kiss and looked at the man, reaching for his pyjama top. He unbuttoned it, slipping it off and letting it join Severus’ nightshirt, ignoring his urge to cover himself. He silently reminded himself that Severus had seen all there was to see of him. Severus was not disgusted. Severus wanted him.

“I want you to touch me,” Harry whispered once more. He felt Severus’ hands travel along his arms, felt them rest on his shoulders. Harry nodded at him and the hands continued, sweeping across his collarbone, down across his nipple in a feathery caress.

“You are so beautiful,” Severus whispered, his hands now resting on his distended abdomen. He reached for them and pulled them back up, settling them on his chest. He pulled Severus forwards once more, kissing him gently.

“I want you to show me how good it can be, how good being touched by another is supposed to feel,” Harry asked, his voice strong.

“Harry, if you feel like this is too much, if you begin to panic and can’t continue, tell me. I promise you I will stop. We will only go as far as you want, you are in control here,” Severus advised, his tone gentle and reassuring, his hands motionless on his chest.

“I’ll tell you. Please, show me.”

Severus moved his hands to Harry’s hips, pulling the young man to him, settling him on his lap. Harry wrapped his legs around the older wizard, the two of them still. Harry become conscious of his lack of panic, that he felt safe and cherished in the slim strong arms.

“I’m okay,” Harry whispered.

He felt Severus trail his fingers along his spine as he kissed him, Harry making it go deeper, experiencing the first feelings of true desire rise in him, slowly. He wrapped his arms loosely around Severus’ neck, needing to touch the man. He threaded his fingers in the dark hair, the glossy strands tickling his fingers. Severus had washed his hair recently. His hair felt like silk.

“I love you,” Severus murmured, one hand coming to rest on the small of Harry’s back, the other moving to his front to stroke the sensitive skin of his chest. Harry gasped at the alien sensation running through him from such a small touch.

“I love you.”

Severus’ fingertips found his nipple, stroking lightly, the new sensation of pleasure continuing to course through Harry’s body, making a quiet moan tumble from his lips, falling onto his lovers. He felt something new: the blood rushing to his cock. It wasn’t much but it was definitely there. It felt different to when it had happened by accident.

“Severus, more, please.”

He felt the older mans surprise at his plea and kissed him in encouragement. Severus rolled his nipple between his fingertips in response. Harry’s expected panic seemed to have packed its bags and disappeared for the night. This felt right, so right. To have Severus touching him like this had Harry puzzled. ‘Why would you get something like this wrong when it feels so good done right?’ Harry thought as Severus afforded the other nipple the same treatment, their kisses becoming a little wilder.

Harry suddenly stiffened at the feel of something pressing against his thigh. He shrank back, not quite panicked but certainly apprehensive. “Stop,” he said, needing more air than he could take in.

Severus stopped touching him, lifted him out of his lap and to the mattress, let his hands land on Harry’s safe area of his legs.

Harry knew he was shaking outright now, but he couldn’t quite figure out why. He wasn’t quite scared, more nervous. Then he figured it out. He hadn’t seen all of Severus, hadn’t seen what was beneath that black silk.

“Are you all right?” Severus asked him quietly.

Harry smiled a little. He had stopped, no hesitation at all to pull back. Severus always kept his promises.

“I just had a wobbly moment.”

“Perfectly all right. If you want us to stop for the night we can.”

“No, that’s not what I want.”

“We can stop for a few moments,” Severus offered.

“No, I don’t want to stop at all. Severus, I want to see all of you,” Harry said, his hands going forward to stroke the waistband.

Severus looked at him in surprise. “Are you sure?”

“Yes. I think that’s why I pulled away. I think I need to see it, I need to know.”

“All right.”

Harry watched as Severus left the bed, standing before him, bathed in the ginger light. He looked at Harry, waiting until he nodded before pulling down the boxers, leaving them in a pile on the floor as he rejoined Harry. He permitted Harry to push him back so he was reclining against the headboard, giving Harry a clear view of ‘all’ of him.

Harry looked at the man and saw immediately how he was different.

“Why don’t I have any hair, like you do?” Harry asked, toying with Severus’ chest hair. His eyes skimmed over the hair on his legs, under his arms, between his thighs. He let his stare land on the light stubble on Severus’ jaw. He didn’t shave like Severus had to, no hair grew on his face. In fact, all he had was a light scatter on his thighs and between them. It seemed a little unfair to him.

“I think it is just the way you are. It doesn’t really matter, it’s a part of what makes you what you are,” Severus replied reassuringly and Harry nodded. 

‘How does he do that?’ Harry thought. ‘How does he always know the right thing to say?’

Harry let his eyes land on the mans nether regions and swallowed. It was slimmer than Lucius’. Somehow this made it less threatening, its smaller girth. He reached his hand forwards but pulled it back. He looked up at Severus, finding those black eyes watching him patiently.

“Can I touch you?” Harry asked.

“If you want to,” came the quiet reply, the voice calm and reassuring, conveying to Harry that it was fine if he didn’t.

Harry’s eyes landed on the mans half hard member. He laid his hand on his thigh, taking it slow. He moved to a kneeling position beside the mans slim hips. He let his hand slide up slowly, let his fingertips brush it. It twitched and he pulled his hand back, looking to the dark gaze for reassurance.

“The twitch is a sign that I like your touch,” Severus explained, laying his hand on Harry’s back to restore confidence in him. 

Harry landed his hand on the mans chest, directly above his heart. “Am I in here?” he whispered, his green eyes locked with black.

“You have my heart. It is all yours, all of it. You are in here,” Severus replied, settling his free hand over Harry’s briefly before laying it at his side.

Harry let his hand slide down, feeling the warm skin beneath his fingers, the trail of coarse hair starting from the mans navel. He slowly let his hand rest on top of the organ, feeling Severus stiffen slightly at the contact.

“Does it feel good?” Harry asked, genuinely curious.

“Yes. Has it never felt good for you?” Severus replied.

“No. I never knew how to…to…” Harry struggled to find the word.

“Please yourself?”

“Yes. I never quite figured out how to do that. I guess it came from my opinion of my own bits.”

“And now?”

“I wonder if it could feel as good for me as it does for you, if you could carry on what you did to me last night,” Harry murmured, letting his fingers wrap around it, smirking slightly as Severus worked hard to suppress his moan. The penis in his hand seemed to become harder. He didn’t think his had ever done that. He had gotten hard but he had never found any gratification from it, it was simply something that happened every now and again. Though there was the reaction Severus’ touch had caused in him those times he had devoted himself to sweeping touches over his skin. ‘Is he feeling something like that?’ Harry wondered. Severus’ hand slipped from his back to rest on his hip, the grip the slightest bit tighter than usual but still light. If it really did feel that good then he was amazed at Severus’ control. He released the penis and let his fingers trail over the sac, cupping it and marvelling at the velvety sensation. Severus had bunched up the sheet in his free hand but the one on Harry’s hip was still light, and his face was calm. Harry let go of the pouch and rested his hand on Severus’ stomach. 

“Do you enjoy it, my touching you?” Harry asked.

“Very much so. I find your touch to be very enjoyable,” Severus replied, his voice possessing the slightest quiver.

“Can you show me how to do it?”

“Do what?” Severus breathed, obviously fighting for control.

“Make it feel good. Can you make me enjoy it?”

“Are you sure that is what you want?”

“Yes.”

“Would you like me to pleasure you with my mouth or my hands?” Severus asked, watching Harry’s face as he considered it. Personally, he wanted to pleasure him with his mouth, wanted to taste him, but tonight was about Harry’s wants.

“Your hands.”

Severus sat up and pulled him in for a gentle kiss, slowly laying Harry down on his side. His fingers skittered over Harry’s skin, sweeping away any thought with his touch, making Harry’s mind switch off with the sensations. It was what he needed, to forget, to lose himself. Severus’ fingers teased his nipples again, Harry moaning into the deepening kisses, Severus coaxing him into his mouth with his tongue. The fingers slipped down and Severus toyed with the elastic waist of his pyjama bottoms.

“Yes,” Harry breathed between kisses. Severus left his lips to pull down the soft cotton, slipping it slowly off of his legs and dropping it with their other clothes. Severus’ lips attached themselves to his neck, nipping and kissing, as his hand landed on Harry’s thigh. Harry let himself go with the sensations, his hands on Severus’ shoulders. The older man pulled back and studied his face as his hand moved higher, sweeping it round to rest on his backside.

“Yes?” Severus asked, kissing Harry as he nodded.

Severus scooted closer and entwined them, pulling Harry’s leg up to rest on his hip, Harry’s hands coming up to lie on the mans chest. They lay there, unmoving, Severus waiting for Harry to get used to the position. Harry decided that this wasn’t a bad way to lie down and nodded. Severus kissed him, the most possessive kiss he had ever given him, and Harry found himself enjoying it thoroughly.

Severus’ hand slipped between their bodies, a lingering caress on his bump before it went down between his thighs. Harry let out a startled moan when Severus’ long nimble fingers wrapped around his cock. The hand was motionless, just a gentle pressure on his skin, but it felt good to have it there, to feel Severus touch him. 

“More,” he breathed and Severus kissed him on the tip of his nose before stroking him, setting a leisurely pace. 

“Oh God,” Harry moaned. “It feels good.”

Severus chuckled at the surprise in the declaration. “See? You’re not so different from the rest of us. It feels good if done right. This is how being intimate is supposed to feel,” Severus assured.

Severus found himself determined to make it feel good for Harry, determined to erase the memory of anyone else ever having touched him. Harry was his. Harry’s inexperienced touch on him had made his passions ignite but he took it slow, watching Harry constantly. He was amazed at the ease with which Harry handled this new aspect to their relationship. He listened to every sound from the soft lips, waiting for the word no, waiting for some sign that he should stop, but it didn‘t seem to be something that was likely to happen. Harry was definitely showing his acceptance with his breathy moans, those green eyes fluttering. His cock was painfully hard but he ignored it, his attention fixed on the beautiful being experiencing his first pleasures of the flesh because of him.

Harry’s lips latched onto Severus’ and he began to move his hips slightly, experimenting. He had never felt anything like these new sensations coursing through him, never felt the searing heat burn within him, never felt his nether regions were good for anything. Until now, until Severus’ hands and lips. He gasped as Severus pulled away, watching as the man fumbled in his bedside cabinet for something. The hand returned a moment later clutching a tube.

“What’s that?” Harry asked uncertainly.

“Lubricant. It will make my touch smoother, if you are all right with me using it,” Severus answered lightly, his dark eyes fixed on Harry’s face.

“Will it still feel good?”

“I use it when I pleasure myself. It will feel better than good, I promise.”

Concern flitted across Harry’s face and then his calm was back in place. Severus was honestly staggered by the trust the younger wizard had bestowed upon him and impressed by his calm. Harry nodded at him and watched as Severus squeezed some of the slick gel into his palm, manipulating it with his fingers to warm it, his other hand threaded through Harry’s hair, massaging his scalp. His hand travelled back down and he resumed his stroking once more, Harry letting out a full throaty moan at the gliding strokes.

“More. Please, Severus, I need more,” Harry pleaded, one of his petite hands sliding across his chest to grip him about the ribs. Severus’ slick fingers moved down, caressing his balls, stroking his clit and Harry arched into the touch. 

Severus faltered as Harry’s hand, slick with lubricant, wrapped around his cock. ‘When did Harry take hold of the tube?’ he wondered. He moaned as Harry began to stroke him, the touch light, hesitant but gaining confidence as Severus thrust slightly into his grasp. Severus kept hold of his senses, not forgetting who he was with even though that touch was exquisitely distracting. What Harry needed was for this to go slow, for this not to spiral out of his control. He sucked Harry’s earlobe into his mouth and caressed it with his tongue, letting his fingers trail down to his vagina.

Harry stiffened at the finger poised over his entrance. He removed his hand from Severus’ member, something he had felt strangely confident about doing, and grasped at the mans arm. “Yes,” Harry whispered and tried to stay relaxed as Severus slipped a finger into him. It was so different from when Lucius had touched him there. It felt kind of good. Odd, but good. After a moment the finger slid deeper, Harry finding it felt right to have Severus touch him inside, that it felt nice. He pushed down against the finger and felt another join it. He thought he felt Severus’ fingers trembling slightly.

“Severus, I want…” Harry whispered. The fingers were withdrawn and Harry found that he missed them, missed that gentle touch. He didn’t know why but he need it. He decided not to question his desires to closely. Severus loved him, he wouldn’t hurt him. The hand came to rest on Harry’s thigh and those dark eyes were fixed upon his green ones.

“What, love? Tell me what you want, Harry,” Severus whispered to him.

“I want you. I want you to claim me.”

“Tonight?” Severus asked cautiously. “You want me to claim you now?”

“Yes. I want you to have me, have all of me tonight.”

“Are you sure?” Severus asked, his eyes kind and searching. 

“Yes.” Harry paused. “I don’t know why but I’m not panicking. I want this, I want you. I feel fine, better than fine. You make me feel wonderful. Severus, I…I…”

Severus reached up and caressed Harry’s side, letting Harry take his time.

To Harry it seemed as if Severus would wait forever like this for him and it gave him the conviction to carry on.

“I never knew it could be like this. I never thought I could ever feel good like this. Thank you. Thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome. You make me feel good too.”

“I want you to claim me,” Harry repeated and gasped as Severus rolled them. Harry found himself straddling Severus, the mans gentle grip on his hips. “I get to be on top of you?” he asked in surprise.

“Yes. This way you are in complete control of how deep I go, of the pace and the strength. This way you can simply roll off of me if it gets too much for you.”

Harry admired the amount of thought the man had put into this. His hands were resting on the broad chest and he could feel his heart pounding, the only sign the man was struggling to hang on to his discipline. Harry leaned down and kissed him.

“You think of everything,” Harry said, amusement in his voice, and Severus giggled. Well, as close to a giggle as you could get from Severus Snape. “How long has it been for you, since you last did this?” He suddenly needed to know, though he wasn’t quite sure why. It was clear in his gentle seduction, his sweeping touch, that he had done this before. But how long had it been?

Severus had to actually think about it, it had been that long. “I was not long out of Hogwarts, I think. It’s been a while, more than a decade since I was last with someone. It was a brief encounter, I believe. Why do you ask?” Severus replied easily, not seeing any potential problems with sharing the information with his lover. 

Harry smiled at the honesty. “Just wondering.” A unexpected unpleasant thought happened upon Harry. “Severus? Will we hurt the baby if you claim me?” Harry asked, worried about how his actions could affect his child. He wanted Severus, but not at the risk of hurting the baby.

“No. I will be gentle with you, and it will all be at your pace. We won’t hurt the baby, love, I promise,” Severus reassured, laying a gentle hand on the swell of the infant.

Harry smiled and nodded, leaning in for a gentle kiss. “Claim me,” Harry whispered against his lips.

The man reached between Harry’s thighs, his hand slick with renewed lubricant, and stroked his own organ, coating it. His hand travelled up and smeared it around Harry’s opening, slipping his fingers inside, Harry gasping at his teasing stroking of the tender flesh. Harry was wet in anticipation but he wanted this to be as smooth as possible, with very little chance of Harry feeling any pain. His gentle touching of the petite being had shown him just how tight Harry was. Severus gripped his thigh with one hand and used the other to place the tip of his penis in position, poised, waiting, before gripping the other thigh as well.

Harry let himself sink down extremely slowly, taking it easy. He came to rest in the cradle of Severus’ hips, the hands on his thighs reassuring as he hissed in discomfort. They were at a halt, and Severus seemed to be content to stay like that forever, joined but unmoving. Harry leaned his head down and leaned on the broad chest as he rode out the soreness. It didn’t hurt exactly, he just felt impossibly stretched. Harry found himself focussing on the black eyes, on the hands on his thighs, on the sensation of being filled. ‘Lube is wonderful stuff,’ Harry contemplated to himself. ‘It made that so much easier.’ After a few moments Harry sat up and moved experimentally, gasping at the jolt of pleasure that ran up his spine and caused him to move on the man in an unsteady rhythm. The grip on his thighs moved to his hips and Severus guided him, helping him find his pace.

“It doesn’t hurt,” Harry moaned in surprise, moving a little harder onto the man below him, leaning his weight on the mans shoulders to give himself more pull, gasping at the feel of the new angle within him, at how that part behind his balls rubbed against Severus. 

He didn’t feel ugly or repulsive, he didn’t want to pull away in fear and shame. Right then and there, Harry felt beautiful, cherished, loved. They moved slowly for a long time and Harry let himself relax further, let Severus lead him in this lovers dance. It started to build in him, that heat, and Harry pulled Severus into a messy kiss, the older man moaning, the two of them moving faster.

Severus groaned as Harry kissed him, the kiss more demanding than anything Harry had ever shown him before. His knees came up of their own accord to give him more leverage. He began to gradually move his hips up to meet the measured thrusts on him, helping Harry to reach his peak. The pressure around his member was incredible, so hot, so tight. It felt so right to be like this, the two of them making their own world, righting the wrongs of Harry’s past with their desires. Harry was moaning deliciously at the deeper penetration, gripping at his hair, his body moving in fluid arching, breathless. ‘So beautiful,’ he thought as he brushed his fingers across one pebbled nipple, earning a pleasured cry from his lover.

“Severus…please…I need it…please…help…I don’t know…I can’t…I need!” Harry pleaded incoherently, the last word drawn out and insistent. It was the least clear Harry had ever been in his life but Severus understood.

Severus disentangled one of Harry’s hands from his hair and pulled it down, wrapping it around his cock, guiding it as he stroked himself for what Severus knew to be the very first time. Once Harry had found his own rhythm he let his fingers slide back, stroking Harry’s clit for him. His other hand reached up and toyed with his nipples, moving from one to the other, rolling them between his fingertips, caressing his breasts.

Harry felt Severus guide him in stroking his own cock before pulses of bliss screamed through him, soft fingertips on that bit of his female parts that felt so good, stimulating it again. Pleasure shot through him and his release hit him like a battering ram. He heard himself scream out and felt Severus stiffen beneath him and then there was nothing. No seeing, no hearing, just pleasure scorching through every inch of him, shocks wracking his body and strong arms pulling him down, encasing him as he rode it out, this powerful pleasure that he saw himself easily becoming addicted to.

Severus felt him stiffen, felt the warmth of Harry’s release coat his skin, Harry screaming as it hit him. He was very glad of the permanent one way silencing charm he had placed on his bedroom, for he felt sure they would have woken the world. But then all thought fled, just Harry clamping vice-like around him, forcing Severus’ own release from him. He cried out, screaming Harry’s name before surrendering to it, letting Harry’s body force his own climax along with him like a force of nature. He had never felt his orgasm hit him so hard before and he lost himself in it, filling Harry with his seed. When he regained a margin of competency he slipped from the body above him, laying the sprite down and encasing him in his own arms as Harry yielded to the last tremors of his climax. He tossed the tube of lubricant aside, switched off the light, and pulled the blankets up around them, trapping their warmth.

Harry’s next conscious thought was of being warm and safe, the blankets tucked around them as he lay in Severus’ arms, his back to the mans chest. 

“Severus?” Harry asked, surprised by how raw his voice sounded.

“I’m right here, Harry. Are you all right?” Severus replied, a slight tightening of his arms, his warm breath ghosting over the skin of Harry’s shoulder.

Harry considered it. He was slightly sore down below, but he decided it was a good kind of sore. There was no panic, no fear. For the first time he felt completely and utterly free. It took him a moment to figure out why. He was free, finally and absolutely. He wasn’t Lucius’ property anymore. Was he okay? Yes, he decided he was. And incredibly sleepy all of a sudden, sleepier than he had ever felt in his life, his limbs like jelly.

“I’m okay. Are you?” Harry replied, fighting the rising tiredness.

“Better than okay.”

“This means that you own me now, doesn’t it? This means that I’m yours,” Harry asked, his tone as light as he currently didn’t feel. His sated body felt heavy and weak, the lure of sleep pulling at him.

“Yes, it does.”

“Severus?”

“Yes?” Severus replied, amused at the exhaustion in his lovers voice. He let his thumb stroke across the soft skin of the small baby bump, feeling Harry entwine their fingers.

“What Remus said about me getting married…” Harry trailed off drowsily, snuggling further into the embrace, hoping Severus would do his trick of always knowing what to say, of always knowing what Harry was on about.

“Would you like to marry me, Harry?” Severus asked, trying desperately to keep his fear and uncertainty a secret. ‘Oh Merlin, please let him say yes,’ he thought desperately.

“Yes, I want to marry you, to be yours forever.” He moaned sleepily at Severus’ smile against the skin of his shoulder. “But not right now. Maybe later. I’m tired,” he replied, letting his eyes close, enjoying the warm embrace and, strangely, their nudity and stickiness.

Harry’s tired reply elated and amused Severus. Remus’ information on what Harry being married meant had given Severus a glimmer of hope that maybe he could keep Harry, that maybe he could claim him forever. He let his mind gloss over the speed of this union with Harry, reasoning that they had gone at Harry’s pace, that it had been all Harry’s choice, he was just along for the ride. Well, mostly. That glimmer of hope had now filled him with happiness he could barely contain. He kissed the pale neck and then the shoulder before he settled himself around his lover, grinning like a madman. 

“No, not right now. We’ll figure it out in the morning.”

“Love you, Severus,” Harry mumbled.

“I love you, Harry,” Severus replied, but Harry was already somewhere else, off in his dreams. He kissed the pale skin of his neck once more and settled himself, letting the pleasures of the night and his relief at his accepted proposal bring him to the same state as his fiancé.

‘Forever,’ Severus thought as he surrendered to slumber, a smile etched on his lips.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@


	2. Chapter Two

Severus watched him sleep as the dawn broke over them, propped up on one elbow, Harry snuggled safely against him. He had slept less than an hour, preferring instead to watch as his Harry dreamed on. He was utterly exhausted, but happier than he could ever remember being.

The thin February first light filtered in through the window opposite his bed, gently creeping across Harry’s face. He stroked one long finger over one impossibly high cheekbone, smiling softly as Harry turned towards the contact. So different from the beginning, when Harry had shied away from even the most innocent of touches. In those early weeks, once he had regained enough strength to do things unaided, Severus had not even been able to brush his hand accidentally without him flinching. Any accidental contact had made Harry recoil, only allowing physical contact when he initiated it or during his frequent panic attacks. But it had gotten better, and Severus could hardly believe what had happened between them last night. If it hadn’t been for the delicious ache in his thighs and their nudity he would have dismissed it as a particularly intense dream. But it wasn’t, it was real and Harry was his.

Or was it the other way round? Was he Harry’s?

The beautiful creature rolling over to burrow into his chest had him wrapped around his little finger, and Severus couldn’t in all good conscience say that he minded in the slightest. If he was honest with himself, he would say that he worshiped the feeling of Harry owning him. He made the decision to accept this new happiness, to let it lead him, wherever that may be. The emerald orbs fluttered open, locking with his, and without warning it didn’t matter who owned who. They were together and Harry was free from Lucius, that was all that was important.

“Morning,” Harry croaked and Severus found himself pulled in for a sweet kiss.

“Good morning, love.”

Harry moaned and stretched against him, wincing slightly though a small smile lingered through it.

“Did I hurt you?” Severus asked concernedly. Had he been too rough with him? His hand came up to stroke Harry’s cheek, watching the younger man smile up at him.

“No. Well, not in a bad way, I don’t think. It’s not a bad kind of pain, just sort of…there, like an ache,” Harry reassured. “I kind of like it, oddly. It reminds me of what we did,” he added shyly, blushing as Severus chuckled.

“I see. You’re sure I didn’t hurt you? I wasn’t too rough?” Severus asked, Harry pulling him down to lay facing him.

“No, it was…” Harry trailed off, trying to find the words. “You made me feel good, very good. You made me feel the most wonderful things. I never thought I could ever feel that good, not down there, not because of what I have down there. Thank you.”

Harry kissed him softly. “You are very very welcome,” Severus said suggestively against his lips, hearing Harry giggle. “Harry, when I asked you to marry me last night and you said yes, did you mean it? I mean…well…do you really want to, or was it the afterglow of what we did?” Severus struggled, terrified he would change his answer in the light of day but needing to know the truth.

“Yes, I meant it. I want to be with you forever. I never want anyone to touch me again, never anyone but you. If we get married then I can stay, I can be yours forever,” Harry said calmly without a moments hesitation, letting Severus claim his lips possessively, grinning into the kiss.

“Are you sure it’s me that owns you and not the other way round?” Severus joked, his hand coming to rest on Harry’s bare hip. “I never thought I’d have something like this,” he admitted, dropping his gaze.

“Something like what?”

“You, what we have. I never thought I’d love anyone like this, like I love you. I never imagined I’d be engaged, and I certainly never imagined becoming a father. I’m afraid,” he whispered.

“Afraid of what?”

“That it’s not real, that maybe it’s all a dream. I’m afraid that I’ll lose you. Harry, I can’t do that, I can’t lose you,” Severus pleaded, pulling him closer. Harry surged forwards, wrapping his arms around his neck, pulling him into a fierce hug.

“You won’t. Do you really think that I’d go anywhere with anyone other than you? Do you think I would let anyone touch me the way you did last night without killing them first? I mean it, I will never allow anyone but you to touch me, I will never allow anyone to own me but you. I’ll kill them first. I know I couldn’t have stopped him, when he did those things to me, but I won’t ever let myself end up there again. I’m yours, only yours.”

Severus pulled back and kissed him, sweeping away the sudden anger in the young being. “I will never let anyone claim you from me, Harry. So, you don’t have to resort to such violence. I will never let anyone take you from me.”

“So, in light of the way that we feel about someone claiming me away from you, I think it’s a good idea for us to get married very soon,” Harry said, logically, making Severus chuckle.

“Sounds good to me.”

“Severus, can we keep it simple? The wedding, I want it to be small, not too many people. When you think about it, me and you really did all we needed to last night. We had our own kind of celebration,” he finished bashfully, ducking his head in shyness before looking at his lover again, his gaze steady. “The wedding is just a formality to make it permanent. We don’t have to have a big party with all those people, do we?”

“Not if you don’t want to. We can…” Severus broke off as a tentative knock at the door interrupted him. He and Harry slipped back into their discarded sleepwear and he moved to the door, finding Draco waiting patiently behind it.

“The headmaster is downstairs. He’s asking for you,” Draco said. He was still in his pyjamas, his hair ruffled, and Severus supposed he must have been woken by the old wizards arrival. Draco was a light sleeper and he and Harry had been distracted, so it was no wonder he had been the one to greet Albus.

“Draco, please go and tell him that I will be down shortly,” Severus said swiftly. He crossed to the bed, sitting down slowly. “I wish we could spend all day in bed but, regrettably, that is not an option now. Harry, please do not shower yet,” Severus said calmly.

“Why?”

“We may need to do some kind of spell to prove that you now belong to me. I’m not sure what it may entail but we cannot afford to wash away the remnants of last night just yet.”

“Oh. All right. Is it all right if I stay in bed? I’m not sure if I’m ready to see Professor Dumbledore.”

“Of course.” He dropped a lingering kiss on Harry’s lips and smiled at him before pulling on his robe and sweeping from the room. He entered the living room to find Albus seated in one of the armchairs, unwrapping a sherbet lemon. Harry liked the room this way, with all the overstuffed chairs. The number of chairs had increased from four to eight, most of them settled in pairs. It made the room a little overcrowded but the overall effect was comfortable rather than cluttered. He smiled briefly. Harry had told him that it felt like sitting on a cloud and he usually found his lover settled in one with his feet on another, engrossed in a book, whenever he had to go in search of him.

“Albus. It’s a surprise to see you. Forgive my state of undress,” Severus said as he sat down opposite his mentor. He could hear the sound of clinking china from the kitchen, informing him of Draco’s location. “May I make a request before I ask what has prompted this visit?” Severus asked quickly, not wanting to get distracted.

“Of course. I apologise for getting you out of bed,” Albus said, his eyes twinkling madly.

“Quite all right, I was awake. Albus…” Severus faltered, searching for the right words. “Albus, I claimed Harry last night. He wanted it, it was his choice,” he added quickly.

“I see. Was it simply his way of freeing himself from Lucius’ grasp?” Albus said, his words cautious. He was surprised that Remus’ theory of Harry and Severus was correct. It wasn’t often that someone else’s ideas surprised him. Very little did after so many years.

“No, not simply that. Albus, I…” Severus felt like he was confessing something very private and hesitated in telling the old man of his feelings. Albus was the best father figure he had ever been under the care of and he felt that it was important for him to understand how he felt, for him to know of what he had found with Harry, for him to share in it. “Albus, I love him,” he confessed quietly, looking directly into those blue eyes. “And he loves me. He said yes to my proposal of marriage, he wants me to raise his child with him, to take the place of the baby’s father.”

“I am happy for you, my dear boy. How does this make you feel, this relationship with Harry? You are happy, aren’t you?”

Damn it, how did he always know the right words to say, the right things to ask? Severus had wanted to know that ever since his youth. He supposed it must just be the wisdom of age. 

“I am happy. I never thought I could be this happy, Albus. It is somewhat alien to me but I am learning to relax into it. He makes me happy, and I believe I do the same for him.”

“Then I am all in favour this relationship,” Albus said with a gentle smile.

“Thank you, old friend. I have to ask though, is there something that needs to be done, a spell perhaps, to prove that he is mine now?”

Albus looked thoughtfully at his former student. The man looked younger than he had in years and it set Albus’ mind at ease. He had seen the longing stares from both Harry and Severus since Harry was in his third year, knowing at the time that neither of them were ready to admit that they held any feelings other than loathing for the other. He found it oddly satisfying to hear that they had finally managed to find each other.

“I am unsure. I do not recall my mother ever having being claimed by anyone other than my father so I cannot look back on my own experience. My mother rarely spoke of what she was and I never questioned it.”

“Perhaps Remus will know?”

“Perhaps. I will go and consult him now so we can get this over with swiftly. I assume that neither you nor Harry have bathed since the union?”

“No, I didn’t think it wise.”

“Probably a prudent decision. I will go and consult Remus now, and when we have this straightened out we can get down to the business of why I have come. I will return shortly,” Albus said as he moved to the fireplace. He flooed out and Severus figured he had at least half an hour, if not longer, before he returned. He moved to the kitchen and fixed Harry a bowl of cereal, fetching Harry’s morning potions from the cupboard. Draco smirked slyly at him over his spoon and he just didn’t have the heart to cast the disapproving glare it should have earned. He smiled back and added glass of orange juice and a cup of coffee to his tray before making his way upstairs.

“I brought you breakfast, love,” Severus said. He set the vials of potion on the bedside table and settled himself beside his lover, sipping his coffee as Harry ate with more of an appetite than Severus had seen since he arrived.

“What did Professor Dumbledore want?” Harry asked between mouthfuls of Cocoa Pops. Thank god for muggle food delivery systems. Solarin was placing orders for them from a compu-thingy, sending their groceries to them via owl, and it kept them in milk and other things that they consumed daily, such as the breakfast cereals Harry had a fondness for, especially the chocolate ones. Solarin had expanded the selection of chocolate cereals and Harry seemed to have developed not only one sweet tooth but an entire mouthful of them.

“I don’t know yet. He went to ask Remus about how we prove I have claimed you before he got to it.”

Harry blushed. “Oh, Sirius is going to take this so well,” he said sarcastically as he leaned over Severus, placing his bowl on the nightstand, his comment earning a chuckle from the Potions Master.

“Oh yes, I’m sure he’ll throw us a party,” Severus said with a dark smile. “I’m sure Remus will help him accept it.”

Harry took his potions and then the two of them were silent, throwing flirty glances at each other over the rim of their cups. Severus was ecstatic that Harry had managed to finish his whole breakfast for the first time and decided to reward him. He placed the two cups on the bedside table and pulled him in for a hungry kiss, Harry reacting wonderfully to the gentle seeking hand that had slipped under the pyjama top to caress his chest, letting his touch move cautiously in case Harry was not receptive to it.

“Severus, I need it, please,” Harry begged between intense kisses, arching beneath the teasing fingers on his nipples, his hips thrusting against the thigh Severus had worked in between his own. Severus was surprised at the immediacy of Harry’s passionate desire, at the sheer force of it as it hit his youthful lover. He took his own lead from Harry’s confidence, letting his lover lead him. Severus wandlessly shut the door and slipped his hand into Harry’s pyjama bottoms, stroking the hard cock, setting a relentless pace. There was no reluctance from Harry, no hesitation at all as he reached into Severus’ boxers and stroked him, the two of them bringing each other to a rapid yet satisfying end, Harry biting down on the shoulder he had uncovered, surprising Severus again with his easily gained release. Severus found that he was pleased to feel Harry’s sticky emissions on his skin. He had worried that with the damage Lucius had caused Harry would not be able to produce it, but it seemed not to be a problem. Even if Harry would never father children, it was still satisfying for him to know that Harry would not have to deal with being different in that aspect of himself.

They panted against each other, taking unhurried kisses.

“That was unexpected,” Harry joked after he had stopped gasping.

“As was last night. I must say, I enjoyed that tremendously,” Severus answered, stripping Harry and himself of their sticky clothes, wiping them off with them as best he could. They both really needed a shower and he wished Albus would come back soon so they could take one, together if he had his way.

Harry smirked as he slid into clean attire, a loose t-shirt and sweatpants. Severus’ clothes were much the same as his own and he thought Severus looked delicious, all sleep tousled and flushed still from their activities. Severus seemed more relaxed than Harry had ever known him to be and it filled him with his own lessening of his general nerves. Harry slipped to the bathroom to relieve his bladder, something the baby was kicking against again, before joining Severus on the landing.

“Harry, I have to say, I am surprised by how easily you have become comfortable with this physical enjoyment of each other,” Severus said as the two of them padded down the stairs barefoot, Harry feeling more confident now. Well, confident enough to face Dumbledore.

“I am too a bit. I can’t explain. It just feels so good, I can’t seem to find the panic like I did before. I’m not even sure when it disappeared, my nervousness. It’s still there but not like before. It’s kind of in the background now,” Harry reasoned. “I suppose your touch must distract me better than before.”

Severus smirked and pulled him in for a kiss before they made their way into the room fully, he and Harry sitting with Draco and chatting about that mornings Prophet until the floo sprung to life, expelling first Sirius and then Remus and Dumbledore.

“You claimed him?” Sirius said immediately, glaring at Severus. Ah, perhaps Remus had not been quick enough with his soothing?

The room went unnaturally still and it occurred to Severus that he had left his wand upstairs on his bedside table. Potentially a bad move right now, Sirius looked murderous.

“Yes, I did,” Severus said calmly, hoping his own calm tone would ease the man. 

It didn’t and Sirius seemed to forget he was a wizard as he lunged for Severus, grabbing the front of his shirt. He managed to get in a punch to Severus’ face before Remus and Albus pulled him off. He felt happiness at the blood pouring from the mans nose. But he felt like a monster when he spied Harry.

Draco watched Harry’s godfather grab his own, hitting him hard. His attention was diverted by Harry bolting from his chair, backing up against the wall in absolute terror, his face scarily pale and his eyes wide. Draco moved to him and shoved his own hatred of being touched deep down inside himself as he let Harry cling to him, the grip on his shoulders so tight it was painful, yet he didn’t complain. He rubbed soothing circles on the slim back and held him steady as he panicked like he had seen Severus do. He seemed to be the only one who had noticed Harry retreat, Severus occupied by being attacked, Sirius by attacking, and Albus and Remus by trying to stop his cousin killing his godfather. The sight of Severus’ bloody nose didn’t help matters any, Harry actually seemed to shrink into himself at the red trail. He supposed he could handle this touch until Severus could relieve him of the Gryffindor currently gasping in fear. Merlin, if someone had told him a year ago, or even just six months ago, that he would be letting Potter anywhere near him, except in a fist fight, he would have called them a bloody liar. But he found himself not minding the damaged young man clinging to him. He hated the touch, but he found it felt good to be helping someone. He finally understood why those people his father called do-gooders did what they did. He held Harry a little closer, feeling useful for the first time in a long time.

“You idiot,” Remus snarled at his husband as he pushed him further away from Severus. “Was that really the best way to react to that news? You fool, look at what you’ve done.”

Sirius couldn’t take his eyes off of Harry. He heard Albus healing Snape’s nose and Remus berating him but he couldn’t tear his eyes away. Harry looked absolutely terrified. Terrified of him, of what he had just done. He had hated the thought of Severus touching Harry when Remus had told he and Albus of his theory the first time, but he should never have let it spiral out of control like this. Good God, Harry was even clinging to Malfoy. What had he done?

Severus wiped away the remaining blood with the handkerchief Albus gave him and moved to the two boys, easing a trembling Harry out of Draco’s arms and into his own, feeling Harry panic and clutch at him.

“Black, you are an imbecile. No wonder Sol attacked you,” he snarled, his temper getting the best of him. His eyes widened at the sight of his attacker. Black looked ashen, his wide eyes full of despair, fixed on the small form in his arms. He watched Remus shove the dark haired man into a chair and stand beside it, a warning hand on the unmoving shoulder.

“Severus?” Harry’s shaky voice dissipated his anger somewhat.

He looked down into wide worried green eyes.

“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Harry asked, his voice worried and insecure, his eyes scanning Severus’ face.

“I’m all right, love. Just a punch to the nose, nothing that hasn’t happened before. Albus healed it for me. See, love? I’m fine,” Severus reassured. So much for Remus soothing Sirius.

Apparently Harry didn’t care who was watching them, and Severus felt that at that moment, he couldn’t bring himself to care either. Harry brought him down into a searching kiss, calming himself in the best way he knew how. He rubbed his hands encouragingly along the slender back, feeling the tension in it ease slightly. When they pulled back, Sirius was looking at them gravely, Remus held a look of resignation and Albus’ eyes were twinkling. Draco was standing uncertainly beside them, apparently unfazed by the public display of affection.

“It’s all right now, he’s all right,” Severus said to them all, seeing a little colour return to Sirius’ face. Damn it, the morning had started out so well. He led Harry to a chair, settling him before perching on the arm, Harry clinging to his hand, his grip almost painful in its strength. “Now, shall we get this out of the way before we go any further? Yes, I claimed Harry. Yes, I intend to marry him. No, I will not use him. No, I will not back down.”

Sirius coughed and looked at Harry, his face pleading, though he looked rather appalled at himself. “I’m so sorry, Harry. I shouldn’t have done that.” He looked up to Severus. “I’m sorry, I should have handled myself better.”

“Yes, you should. Your behaviour was completely out of line, though I can see the thought behind it. Perhaps you can see now why Solarin did what she did?” Severus said spitefully, satisfaction blooming within him at the look of understanding on the Animagus’ face, finally feeling that his sister had been understood. Draco at last moved into the circle, settling himself in a chair not too far from Harry’s. Remus relaxed, though he laid a warning hand on Sirius’ thigh as he sat down next to him. Albus seated himself comfortably, his fingers adopting their usual steepled position, looking for all the world like nothing had happened. Typical Albus. Severus claimed the chair next to Harry’s, not thinking it wise to move too far from him just yet.

“Harry?” Sirius questioned. Harry finally looked up from his contemplation of Severus’ fingers and into his eyes, glaring at him in sudden anger.

“Don’t ever do anything like that again,” Harry demanded, Sirius nodding after a moments pause. He sighed. “Sirius, I love you and Remus, you know that. But I love Severus too. Please, don’t make me have to choose between you and him. Why can’t I just have you both?”

It was this that broke Sirius of all his petty childish loathing of Snape. Remus had been right, if someone had to claim Harry he would rather it be Snape than Lucius Malfoy. He grudgingly admitted to himself that he trusted Snape, though he would never tell Snape that. He reached out and was relieved to feel Harry’s shaking hand slip into his own.

“I would never make you do anything, Harry,” Sirius said with conviction. He felt himself needing to know certain things before he would accept this. Well, as much as is possible for him to accept Snape was screwing his godson. “Do you really love him?” Harry nodded. “And last night was what you wanted?” Another nod. “And this is really what you want, to be married to him?”

Remus looked at Sirius in surprise, he didn’t remember the man being calm enough to register Albus’ statement of marriage. Sirius had looked close to a stroke when Albus had told them of Severus claiming their son, a piece of news no parent ever wanted to know of their child.

“Yes. I want this, I want him. And last night was my choice,” Harry said.

“Then that’s all I need to know. You can have both of us, Harry, you’ll never have to choose. I may not like it but I will be civil to him,” Sirius admitted and Harry nodded. It wasn’t perfect but it was enough. 

Sirius looked at Severus. “Do you love him?”

“Yes, I do,” Severus answered honestly.

“All right then. But if you ever harm him in any way or cause him any kind of pain I will kill you,” he said calmly but with a hint of promise.

“I would expect nothing less from a devoted parent,” Severus replied.

Remus looked at the three of them, his cub and the two men he was caught between. He found himself clutching at his papers, hoping that this fragile truce would last, for Harry’s sake.

“So, shall we get down to the matter at hand?” Albus asked cheerily. “Remus, is there something we need to do to prove that Harry belongs to Severus?”

“Yes, a spell, a few forms and a blood sample,” Remus replied as he checked through his notes, clinging to his role of advisor. He was grateful of the fact he had left his bag untouched on the kitchen table last night, he had grabbed it in a hurry. “We need to fill in this first form and attach a blood sample from Harry to it. Then we need to run a spell, Arthur has included it here, and note the results down on the second form, attaching it to the first. Arthur has provided all the things we will need. Though all this is best done before either of them cleanse themselves, so the results will be pure. The tests rely on Harry’s magical signature, which will be in the blood sample. According to the information provided it will hold an echo of Severus’. The spell is to, um, record Harry’s physical state after the claiming. It’s how we prove this, it’s how we legally free him from Lucius,” Remus finished, his face glowing red in embarrassment.

“Good thing you told me not to take a shower,” Harry quipped, Remus and Sirius looking at him in amazement. Had he just joked? Was this really the same person that had panicked at them only yesterday? The same person that had recoiled in terror just a few minutes ago? 

Remus decided that last night must have had a good effect on his cub and it sat a little better with him now, now that he knew Harry had visibly benefited from it, though he was trying really hard to ignore the lingering smell of sex on both of them, his heightened werewolf senses picking up what others couldn’t. Mind you, he and Sirius still smelled faintly of vodka and each other, so he wasn’t one to talk.

Harry was baring his arm and Sirius was happily handing Severus the sealed pack of the blood sampling kit Arthur had included. ‘Arthur really considered everything,’ Remus thought.

Severus pulled open the kit and prepared the needle, noting that Sirius looked slightly green. “Harry, who do you want to do this?” he asked, leaving the cap on the pointer.

“You do it,” Harry replied, eyeing the hypodermic warily.

He threaded his fingers in the unruly hair and gently coaxed Harry to looking at him. “I’ll do it as fast as I can, I promise.” Harry took a deep breath and nodded. “Hold on to someone, Harry, and tell me when you’re ready,” he said calmly as he wiped the crook of Harry’s arm with the provided alcohol soaked pad. He watched Harry grip at Sirius, the one sitting closest to him, and fought down his apprehension at having to do something that would cause his love the slightest pain.

“I’m ready,” Harry said, looking away. It slightly amused Severus that Sirius couldn’t watch the procedure either, looking at the ceiling while he comforted Harry.

Severus plunged the needle in and withdrew the blood, trying to go as fast as possible, trying not to look at Harry burying his head in Sirius’ shoulder. He withdrew the needle and placed a cotton ball at the wound, pushing Harry’s arm up to hold it there. “It’s done, love. All over.”

Harry’s eyes were wet with tears but his expression was steady. Harry sat quietly while the form was filled in by Severus, the questions shockingly intimate, and Remus performed the spell, Sirius writing down the results, both of them beet red. Soon enough it was all over, Albus taking hold of the parchments and the vial of his blood to take to Arthur so he could file them with the right channels.

“Now, this marriage. When were you thinking?” Albus asked cheerily, stowing the documents and blood in the pocket of his robes.

Severus looked at Harry. “In the next few days? If that’s too soon…” Harry answered uncertainly, everyone but Severus looking surprised.

“Why so fast, Harry? There’s no rush,” Remus questioned.

“I don’t want any chance of someone taking me from Severus. I want it done as soon as possible. I’m protecting myself, Remus. Surely you can see the sense in my thinking,” Harry replied. He didn’t add that he wanted to be Severus’ forever. That was no ones business but theirs.

Remus looked like he wanted to argue but, to Harry and Severus’ surprise, it was Sirius who stepped in. “Remus, do you really want to be the one who denies him?”

Remus smirked, blushing. “Of course not. If it is what Harry wants, so be it. Albus?”

“Well, I see no reason why they cannot be wed this afternoon. That is taking into consideration a lack of occasion with the ceremony, of course.”

“I don’t want a party, I just want the ceremony. With a party there’s a lot of people in a small space. I’m not ready for that, not yet anyway. Severus, is that okay? Can we do that, just have the ceremony?” Harry asked, looking at his gently smiling lover.

“I see no problem. If you’re sure it’s what you want, then we can do that,” Severus answered calmly, trying not to smile too broadly. It could be that easy. Harry could stay with him forever, it could all be made solid that afternoon. There was no way he was going to complain. Anyway, he couldn’t see the point in all the grandeur. He was all for keeping it simple, keeping it about the two of them.

“What about your sister? Don’t you want her to come?” Harry asked, feeling the man had given in too easily. Though he shouldn’t really have been surprised. Scary Professor Snape was the one who argued with everything he said, Severus was the one who seemed content to let Harry lead. More to the point, the witch was Severus’ only family. Shouldn’t he want to share this with her?

“Oh, she won’t come to a wedding. She has a thing about marriage, she won’t attend nuptials. Besides, it’ll just give her the chance to annoy me when she comes to visit. I might as well allow her one chance to do it, might as well give her ammunition against me, just this once,” Severus replied honestly, watching Albus chuckle and Remus snigger. Sirius seemed to be stunned at his wording but he chose to ignore it. He focussed on the soft smile of his Harry, the way his gaze was understanding. 

“All right then.” Harry paused. “Does doing those tests mean that I can go and shower now?” he asked.

“Yes. You go and shower and I will talk with Albus.”

Harry gifted him a sweet swift kiss before disappearing up the stairs, Draco following him to wait in his room for the bathroom to be free.

Severus turned his attentions to the other three wizards. Damn it, there went his chance to share a shower with Harry. Maybe later he could get to do it. “I’m not going to like your actual reason for this visit, am I?” he asked, changing the subject immediately away from the wedding and his relationship with Harry, offering Sirius a way out of the uncomfortable situation. He found he really didn’t want to share it with anyone. He actually heard Sirius sigh in relief at being able to ignore the bond between his boyhood rival and his godson.

“No, you’re not,” Albus agreed. The headmaster sighed, momentarily looking his age. “Lucius attacked Bill and Charlie Weasley yesterday. He seemed to think that they were harbouring Harry. Lucius is beginning to act more and more irrationally. We thought it best to warn you of this. He is looking for Harry actively now.”

“And your plan?”

“To prepare you for a time that may come when you have to put into effect your plans to protect Harry. The time may come when we have to move the three of you to a safer location. Spinners End is known to Lucius, we cannot place it under a Fidelius charm. Grimmauld Place is already concealed, we would move you there.”

“I see the logic in that. It seems wise to prepare for the worst. Lucius is becoming dangerous to those around Harry. To target the Weasley’s shows real thought behind his actions. How are the boys?”

“They seem to be all right, they escaped mostly unscathed. We should be thankful for their skill as wizards. I doubt they would have gotten off so lightly if they had been inexpert. They have already put into place their withdrawal plans devised during the war.”

Severus remembered Bill from the redheads days at Hogwarts. The boy had been abysmal at potions but a friend of his had helped him scrape a pass. He remembered him to be a nice young man.

“And the other Weasley children? Are they safe?” Severus questioned, distracting himself from the memory of two small redhead boys and a smaller dark haired girl covertly flicking potions ingredients at each other, stifling their giggles, during the extra tutoring time he laid on for certain students.

“Yes, actions have been taken to protect them. Minerva is watching over Ron, Hermione and Ginny. We have devised a way to get them to safe keeping at a moments notice should Lucius turn his attentions to the school,” Albus reassured, remembering how fond Severus had been of Bill and Charlie during their time at Hogwarts. How fond he was of all the Weasley children, though he would never admit it. “I have already been to see Fred and George. They are aware that Lucius may visit them, but I have them under the impression that he is simply irrational. Percy is unlikely to be harbouring Harry. He is aware of the rift between Percy and the rest of the Weasley’s?”

“Yes, he is aware. Percy will not be a target. What of Molly and Arthur?”

“I have warded their home, they will be safe for the time being.”

“Severus, what about Solarin? Will Lucius target her?” Remus asked. 

Severus contemplated it. As far as Lucius knew, Lucius thought he and Harry to be the worst of enemies. But several children of Death Eaters remained at the school. All it would take to cast suspicion on him would be for one of them to mention his absence from the school in a letter home. Death Eaters still talked. Lucius would hear of it. Lucius knew of Dumbledore’s trust in him, and of the location of Spinners End. 

And he knew of Solarin and her gift.

“He might. If he discovers I am not at the school he might start to suspect my involvement. He may seek her out when he realizes this house is protected. Solarin laid the protections, and her magical signature is unique. Lucius would have no problems in recognising it. He has witnessed her gift, he has a rough understanding of how it works, enough to be a threat to her. But I don’t believe he is a match for her, even if she does become a target.”

“He took down Bill, one of the best curse breakers in the business,” Sirius offered.

“Sirius, what Solarin did to you is just a taste. She has her own means of defending herself.”

“What was it she actually did to me?” Sirius asked, his curiosity taking over. 

Severus looked at him, measuring his words before he answered. “She calls it Forced Recall. She forces her target to relive every memory they have ever stored all at once. The mind can’t handle it, blood vessels begin to rupture. If she had concentrated harder or for longer it would have made your brain stem explode. She would have killed you. If she had been angry enough, you would have been dead in seconds,” Severus revealed. “Like I said, she has her own means of defending herself. Though, she should be made aware of the situation, as soon as possible.”

“Me and Remus will go.”

“You don’t have to, I can do it,” Severus said embarrassedly. 

“Severus, you’re helping our son. Let us help your sister,” Remus countered. Severus looked uncomfortable, and Remus realized that not many people must have offered their help to him before. Slowly, he was beginning to understand the man a little better. He would never understand all of it, and he didn’t want to. Severus was Harry’s puzzle to solve and he was content to leave it be. Severus nodded finally.

“I will find her address for you, I have it somewhere. Harry can entertain you while I find it and take a quick shower,” Severus said, standing as Harry entered the room. He crossed to the younger man and kissed his cheek. “Do not ask what the conversation was, you don’t want to know. Find something else to talk about. I’ll be down shortly,” Severus commanded, Harry nodding immediately.

As far as telling your parents you were in love with your professor, had slept with him last night and were going to marry him that afternoon went, that was practically a home run.

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Bill sank down onto his bed, his mind in a turmoil. He felt old longings rise in him, white hot and painful, and he wished for her to suddenly appear, the way she used to, seemingly out of no where. He never did find out how she did that. He half expected her to creep up behind him now and run her fingers over the back of his neck, whispering in his ear. 

‘I love you, Bill, don’t you love me too?’

The echo of her words in his head had him fighting back tears. His desire for her had not dissipated over the years like he had hoped it would, it had simply lingered. The conversation at dinner tonight had just made it that little bit harder to fake the smile. Remus and Sirius had gone to see her, to warn her of Lucius, and they had ended up spending the day listening to her joke about her brother as she took them on a tour of muggle London. He wanted, more than anything, to go and see her, walk with her the way they had done, but he knew it wasn’t an option. She would just run that little bit further into hiding. He knew it wasn’t him that made her hide, but he knew it was him that had made it hard for her to go in the first place.

He had lied to Remus, lied to them all when he had claimed that he and Solarin were just friends in school. He knew Dumbledore remembered their time there, knew that if he were to look Snape in the eye he would be right back where he started when she first left, cold and lonely. 

He let his mind wander back to their schooldays, when they had been at their happiest. They had been the oddest couple in Hogwarts history, the Slytherin and the Gryffindor that had been inseparable. Tonks had joined them often, but the metamorphmagus was a member of several clubs and societies so her free time was caught quite often, leaving the two of them alone quite a lot. She had been a year younger, looking like a little porcelain doll when she had walked up to the Sorting Hat on her very first day. They had looked curiously at each other across the Great Hall during the feast. They first met in the library, her limited height making it impossible for her to reach the required book. He had reached over her head, grabbing it for her, smiling shyly at her timid thank you.

He pulled himself to his feet and began to pace, letting himself remember for the thousandth time that day. Not a day went by without her face flitting into his head. Their next encounter had been a few weeks later. He’d been sitting in the library and she had come up to him, asking him if he knew anything about Devil’s Snare. Herbology had never been her best subject. They had spent the next hour sitting there, him helping her to grasp the subject, and then the hour after that talking. Just talking. He found out that day that her name was Solarin, and that it meant one who was made of light that was pure. He chuckled darkly to himself. All her dark hair and dark eyes and yet it had still seemed to suit her. He ended up calling her Arin, the part that meant pure.

He leant upon the scarred wood of the dresser, trying not to let his mind open, not to let it seek hers the way it used to. It was in her third year that they had first kissed. They were sitting by the lake, enjoying a warm Saturday afternoon in May. She was flicking marshmallows into the lake for the giant squid and he had asked her if she thought it was a wise thing to do. She had shrugged and turned to him, kissing him on the lips without a moments hesitation. ‘I think that was a wiser thing to do,’ she had said, grinning at him, her pale cheeks rosy. He had wondered how she had known he wanted her to do that, how she had known he wanted her. She told him what she was that afternoon, and he had found it incredible. She was special, and she wanted him.

He glanced at Charlie as he entered the room, his brother flopping down on his bed with a Quidditch magazine and starting to talk to him about Harry’s marriage, about the girl Remus said had a wickedly dark sense of humour. He drowned him out, his mind taking him to the memory of the first time the connection between them had settled, the first time her thoughts had entered his head instead of his into hers. They had been in bed together, it was her fifth year. She had smuggled him into her private Slytherin room one Hogsmead weekend. It was Halloween. It was their first time. The passion between them had ignited and he had lost himself in her pale skin under his hands, her kiss swollen lips on his own, her dark hair slipping from it’s band to tickle his oversensitive flesh. They had been there, at the brink, when there she was.

[I love you,] came her gentle voice inside his head. It wasn’t the first time they had said it but it was the first non verbal declaration.

He had been a little freaked out by it and had written to his father, asking him what he knew of beings like her, posing his questions as curiosity instead of actual worry. His father had sent him a book.

He sat down on his bed and reached out to his nightstand, running his fingers over the worn cover. Her picture was between the pages. 

He grunted in agreement with what Charlie was saying, lying back against his pillows. The book had educated him and he had relaxed into the new, rare, connection, let it develop until they could be in different rooms on opposite ends of the castle and still be distracting each other with their silent mental conversation. It was later that she had taught him to build barriers, to shut her out. But later, when he was in London and she still at Hogwarts in Scotland, they had still had cross country conversations in their minds.

He wondered if she’d hear him now if he opened it. Was it still strong enough? He refrained from it. Why make it harder on himself?

He ran his fingers through his long hair, sighing. His mother kept urging him to settle down, to find someone and make her a grandmother, to make his own happiness. 

But how could he, when all he wanted was her?

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Harry keened as Severus attacked a particularly sensitive spot, working out the kink as the early morning April sun filtered in through the net curtains. He was on his front on his bed, their bed, with Severus massaging his sore back. He had slept awkwardly and was paying the price for it. He fingered his wedding band as Severus kneaded his lower spine. It had been Severus’ mothers ring, resized to fit him. Severus wore James’ wedding ring, something Sirius had retrieved from Harry’s Gringotts vault for him as a show of good will. They had married that afternoon in late February, the day after Severus had claimed him, in an exceedingly small plain ceremony. Remus and Sirius had been present, as had Draco, and Albus had officiated it. The living room had been where they said their vows and then afterwards they had enjoyed a quiet dinner, the meal ending in cake. Harry looked back on the day with utmost contentment. It had been exactly what he had wanted. And the consummation of his marriage was something that he would always remember with a smile. The last month and a bit had been the best of his life.

Solarin was due in a few hours, coming to read Draco for something, though Harry had not been told what and he had not asked. It wasn’t his business. If he was supposed to know, Severus would have told him. He was looking forward to Severus getting teased and intended to enjoy it thoroughly.

Draco slipped into the room and perched on the bed by Harry’s feet, a clear distance between them. Both of them respected the others problems with being touched and had turned it into a game, seeing how well they could do things like wash up together and play Exploding Snap without touching. So far, neither of them had managed to lose, but it was fun in its own way.

“Between my shoulders, Severus,” Harry begged, moaning as the nimble fingers moved to the requested spot, working their magic.

“Why are you doing that?” Draco asked interestedly, his eyes fixed on Severus’ hands on Harry’s bare back. How could touching someone look that easy?

“He slept awkwardly and has a sore back. He’s eight months pregnant, his back has enough to contend with as it is without sleep induced aches,” Severus replied, Harry signalling that he wanted to get up, Severus ghosting his fingers over Harry’s ribs. 

“Oh. Is it really that painful being pregnant, Harry?” Draco asked, amusing Harry into a fit of giggles. Or that might have been Severus’ fingers dancing over his ribs. He sat up, with Severus’ help, and pulled on his t-shirt, glaring at his smiling husband.

“Pregnancy is no picnic but it’s not that bad really. It gets a bit uncomfortable, but nothing serious,” he answered as they made their way down the stairs. “The worst part is being kicked from the inside,” he said as he laid a hand on his bump, grimacing at the hard hit. 

Draco eased himself into a chair and watched as Harry paced. He had been doing that a lot lately, he said it soothed the baby when it was restless. Draco, like Harry, had never been around someone pregnant before and he had discovered that he found it oddly fascinating, the creation of life within Harry’s body. The fact that the child was his half sibling intrigued him too. He had always wanted a sibling. It was ironic that his wish was being granted by his schoolboy nemesis. Harry had allowed him to plague him with questions, staying patient with him through his curiosity, Severus intervening when Harry’s knowledge had given out. It seemed to Draco that Harry understood his motivations for the constant interrogations and he had found himself relaxing into asking the first ones that came to mind. Harry kept trying to trip him into losing their game by asking him if he wanted to feel the baby kick but he always declined, his disgust at being touched keeping him from be defeated. He had actually found that he kind of liked this friendship he had with Harry, though he would never admit that.

“Why does he kick?” Draco asked as Harry glared down at his bump.

“Merely stretching his limbs,” Severus supplied through a slight grin, settling himself in a chair when Harry shooed him away, claiming he was getting in his pacing path.

“Stretching? No way, he’s bloody attacking me here. He’s going to be a beater, I guarantee it,” Harry quipped. The brunette had become very free with his jokes lately. 

“It hurts when he kicks you?” Draco asked, genuinely surprised through his amusement.

“Depends what he’s kicking. He seems to like my bladder. I’ll be right back,” Harry grumbled, returning up the stairs, Draco sniggering at the waddle he now possessed.

Draco found himself suddenly nervous without Harry distracting him. He couldn’t decide which would be worse, Solarin finding out what was wrong with him? Or her not finding it?

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Solarin rolled over in bed and fought her nausea, trying not to blast her alarm clock to pieces as she switched it off. Her control was hanging by a scant thread and she knew it. It was getting to the point where she would happily spill everything to Severus if he would just make the pain in her head go away.

Oh God, the visit with Draco. She worried how well she would be able to deal with another’s mind but she would be around magical minds, a far tamer animal, she could draw strength from them. She hoped it would be enough. Muggle minds were too fragile, she slipped into them without even trying. It was their electronic aids, it made their lives cluttered and their minds were easily influenced as a result. The minds of witches and wizards were better, she actually had to push against them to get inside. It was getting to be too difficult to stay in the Muggle world.

She sighed, rubbing her temples. She was invisible in this world, she knew that. Her magical signature ensured that she did not show up on CCTV, and random muggles forgot her as soon as she slipped away from them. She had no phone, no bank accounts, no email address. She never received any mail and she had no credit cards. She had lied to Severus about the shopping she did for them, telling him that she used the computer, but in actual fact she did it herself by hand, paying in cash. She had told him that the food was delivered to her and she sent it on by owl. She did their weekly shopping in person and attached it to her own owl, hoping Severus would accept her story in light of the fact his knowledge of muggle systems was not as good as hers. She had not wanted him to know that she was unhappy here, that her life was so empty. She had no friends and her flat appeared to be uninhabited. There was little food there, no personal effects like pictures or ornaments. She had left most of the things she owned at Spinners End. Her nine to five Monday to Friday job at the toy shop was cash in hand, as were her performances on Saturday nights. She was unnoticed and could leave at a moments notice, and she liked it that way.

She still felt the remnants of the Ministry within her mind, chipping away at her. She let her mind linger on the connection to him, wishing she had the conviction to open it, to talk to him. But she shied away from the notion, knowing one mental conversation would not be enough for her, no matter how much she longed for their mindspeak. It also lingered on her that she was too unstable to be able to trust herself not to hurt him with it.

She gingerly eased herself into a sitting position and slipped out of bed, padding to her bathroom and taking a cold shower, hoping it would do what it had before and shock her control back into place. It didn’t work as well as it had the last time but it would be enough to get her to Severus. She dressed and grabbed a large bag, shoving her clothes into it. Her toiletries were added and her photo album, the only personal item she had with her. She looked around, not seeing anything else she wanted to take with her. She sent her owl, weirdly named Kitty, on ahead, her familiar could meet her at Spinners End. She shrunk down Kitty’s stand and slipped it into her bag before she left the flat, pushing the keys through the letterbox. She had made up her mind, she had reached her limit with the muggle world. 

She shoved her headphones on, turning up the volume on her muggle tape player as loud as it would go. The pounding of heavy rock filled her ears and she winced at the sudden noise. It was the only thing she had found that would drown out the noise of all the voices in her head and it would help her make it to Diagon Alley, where wizarding minds would strengthen her control. She walked the short distance from her flat to the Leaky Cauldron, smoking a cigarette on the way.

Her fear of the Ministry be damned, she slipped into the Leaky Cauldron and flooed to Grimmauld Place.

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Harry smiled at Sirius and Draco. They were locked in yet another fierce game of chess. Draco hadn’t managed to beat Sirius at a single game yet, but he was determined. Severus had left Harry and Draco in the care of Sirius and Remus for a couple of hours while he gone to Diagon Alley to do some much needed shopping and to meet Solarin. She had made a hurried floo call to him this morning from Grimmauld Place telling him to meet her there, on the front steps of Gringotts. Sirius and Remus had noticed that she seemed to be rather agitated, yet unharmed, so they had followed her requests to go to Spinners End and watch Harry and Draco. The call had confused his husband but he had agreed to it, even if it had taken him a while to actually leave the house. It was the very first time Severus had left him and so far Harry was feeling cool and collected. Just as long as Severus was home by lunch.

Not long after Severus had left, Solarin’s owl Kitty had arrived and the beautiful black bird of prey was perched on a coat stand, something they had been forced to bring down from Solarin’s bedroom after the old perch had been destroyed, one of Harry’s spells going awry during a Transfiguration lesson. Kitty was perched with Severus’ owl, another black feathered bird called Midnight, and his own snowy Hedwig. Hedwig had arrived at Spinners End a week after he had and he still delighted in her presence, the owl usually landing on his leg and running her beak along his stomach in a show of curiosity for his growing child. Harry was grateful that Hedwig and Midnight had gotten along, and that they seemed to be comfortable with Kitty invading their space.

Harry was sitting comfortably in his favourite armchair by the window, a book forgotten in his lap in favour of watching the heated game. Remus was sat to his right, a thick book of his own the focus of his attention. He winced as the baby kicked him, a sudden inspiration taking hold. He decided to try his luck once more before putting his idea into practice. 

“Draco, the baby’s kicking. Do you want to feel him?” he asked lightly, trying to suppress his grin.

“Nice try. I’m not going to be beaten by that, Potter, so give up the ghost,” Draco replied, smirking at him.

Harry laughed. “It was worth a try. Sirius, Remus, would you like to feel him?”

His fathers looked at him in surprise. “Are you sure, Harry?” Sirius asked, the chess game now forgotten. Draco was watching the scene play out with interest. Harry had never made this request before, and so far only Severus had felt the baby kick. This was new and it intrigued the blonde.

“Yes. I want to see how I handle it. Would you like to feel him?” Harry said. He could think of no better way to test his boundaries. He was very wary of people touching his abdomen, wary of someone other than Severus touching him at all. He had allowed Sirius and Remus hugs at the end of their visits and had clung to Draco in fright when his godfather had hit his husband, but he had not done anything like this. And considering Severus was not within arms reach it was a huge step.

The two of them nodded and Harry reached out and took Remus’ hand, placing it lightly on his bulge, immensely relieved when he found himself comfortable with the contact. He couldn’t see himself allowing it on a daily basis, but it was okay for now. Remus’ smile was wider than he had ever seen a smile as the werewolf felt the baby kick. Remus removed his hand and beckoned a nervous Sirius over to them, the Animagus fully aware that Harry was more comfortable with Remus’ contact than he was his own. Harry had told them that it was just something that he felt, he wasn’t sure why, and Sirius had learnt not to take it personally.

Sirius left his chair, moved slowly to the seat to Harry’s left and sat down, waiting for Harry to show him how to do this without scaring him. His godson took his hand and laid it where Remus’ had been, his husband nodding reassuringly. Almost immediately he felt the baby kick against his hand and a wide smile broke across his face. 

At that moment, Remus and Sirius looked at each other with a gaze that meant something important. Neither of them cared that Lucius had fathered the child, not anymore, not now. It was their first grandchild, and all they cared about was Harry’s happiness. Harry was positively radiant in his late pregnancy, giving out a practically serene vibe. He smiled almost constantly now, and he had just let them feel the babe kick. They felt all of their old worries and dislikes melt away until there was nothing but happiness.

Their son was healing, he was safe, and they were going to be grandparents. Nothing else mattered.

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Severus walked down the cobbled street of Diagon Alley, completing his purchases with a leisurely pace. He had to keep reminding himself that there was no need to rush, that Harry was safe with his parents, that Solarin wouldn’t be there for another half an hour. But it had taken him a full twenty minutes to actually leave the house. Harry had been fine with him leaving, at least he had seemed it. Severus had been the nervous wreck.

It made him uneasy, leaving Harry. He had not left him since he had found him and it was difficult to leave, even harder to actually stay away. He smiled at the memory of Harry telling him to treat this like a test, to see how well he would do at being apart. Harry had promised him a reward tonight if he could stay away for the full two hours. Damn it, he was going to get his reward even if his nerves were shattered afterwards.

He remembered the article Rita Skeeter had written on he and Harry. It had featured front page of the Daily Prophet a week ago. They had all been impressed by how long it had taken for the press to get wind of them. Severus supposed the reporter must have a source in the Ministry who had fed her the information. Surprisingly Skeeter had managed to get the facts right and the article had been positive. Rita Skeeter had actually endorsed them, not a single negative comment in the entire piece. Severus suspected Albus’ intervention. 

The article had been handled well by Harry, his young husband actually joking about it. Thankfully, all owl sent responses to the article had been delivered to Hogwarts. Albus had sorted through it and conveyed only positive mail to them. They had also received several small baby gifts from people wishing to show support of their Chosen One. Severus was enormously grateful that no one in the public knew where he lived, he could only imagine the hoards of owls every morning, and he knew from Albus that not all the mail was pleasant. 

Harry’s safe return was now public knowledge and he remembered Albus’ visit about Ron and Hermione. Albus had told Harry that his friends had decided to wait for him to write to them, not sure of how he would handle being contacted. When they had first read the article, they had been angry that no one had told them of Harry’s rescue, and Albus had deemed it acceptable to inform them of Harry’s rape, putting it as delicately as he could and including none of the gory details. Albus had informed them that Ron and Hermione had specified that they were there if Harry needed them for anything, but they would stay away and leave him be until he was ready. Harry still had yet to contact them. Severus knew his husband missed his friends but Harry had said that he just wasn’t ready to confront that old piece of his life yet. Albus had told them both that Hermione was expecting a girl. Harry had found it amusing to think of his friends as parents, giggling about it to Severus one night, but he had speculated that they must feel the same about his own impending delivery.

It did worry Severus that Lucius had seemingly disappeared and he was prepared to move Harry at a moments notice. His love of the little cocoon they had built themselves in his family home didn’t cloud his determination to protect what was his. His new happiness would not be jeopardised, he wouldn’t let it.

He slipped into Flourish and Blotts, heading over to the section devoted to childcare books. Poppy Pomfrey had already instructed him on how to deliver the baby himself, once she had been informed of the situation, so now he was simply looking for a book on how to raise a magical child. He might have raised Solarin but Harry had no experience of children, magical or otherwise. Severus felt that a book on the subject might ease his lovers concerns.

A sales witch approached him. He recognised her as one of his former students and allowed her to engage him in conversation, accepting her congratulations on his marriage and impending fatherhood. 

“So, can I help you with something today, Professor?” the sales witch asked, Severus struggling to recall her name.

“Yes, I’m looking for a book on raising magical children. Perhaps you know of a basic one? Something too complicated will not be suitable,” he specified and she smiled at him, searching the shelves and retrieving a slim tome for him.

“This one is our best seller, and the reviews of it claim it to be the best for new parents. It should be all right for your husband, Professor, he should find it easy enough,” she assured.

Severus smiled at her and allowed her to claim commission on the book and a few others on potions that he had selected for himself before he exited the store. He found himself walking towards Diagon Alleys biggest nursery retailer. He knew Sirius and Remus had been buying for the baby since February but he couldn’t help himself. He just kept thinking of the delighted look on Harry’s face when the last set of baby quilts had arrived from the catalogue he had been sent by Molly. He wanted to elicit that response again.

The thought of being the one to deliver Harry’s baby made him feel terrified and anxious. Harry had specified that he wanted no one else, that he would only let Severus do it. Harry understood what was involved with the birth of their child and was adamant that no one would touch his genitals but Severus. The declaration had come as no great surprise to Severus, though it had made him more diligent in his lessons with Poppy. He already knew that a caesarean was out of the question, Harry was too compact inside to be eligible for the surgery, his anatomy making it too high a risk. He also knew that Harry would suffer a lot of pain, his hips and birth canal narrower than a normal females, and he had already stocked up on several different kinds of pain relief in preparation. Harry seemed to be calm in the face of impending childbirth, but Severus was still preparing for the worst. Poppy had warned him that labour and birth could bring out the worst in someone, and Harry’s experiences made it likely that Harry would not react well.

He entered the store and perused the shelves, filling a basket with items plucked at random. He had decided to limit himself to just one basket and refrain from using spells to expand it, he feared he could bankrupt himself all too easily in the process of trying to make Harry smile. He strolled into the maternity wear department, determined to find what his lover had requested. 

Harry had woken that morning to not only a sore back but a sore chest as well. On closer examination, Severus had found Harry’s breasts to be swollen, his body preparing to nourish the child once it arrived. He had reassured Harry that it was perfectly normal, that it meant he would be able to breast-feed and that he would find something to help with his discomfort. He reached the rows of what looked like short stretchy vests and Severus selected one that seemed to be Harry’s size, a sales witch assuring him that it was what Harry was in need of. After a moments consideration, he added another two of them and moved on to the other type of garments, the ones labelled nursing bras. Poppy had told him that if Harry was able to breast-feed he may require one of these, so he picked out three black ones, feeling the frilly white ones would not sit well with his husband. 

Harry had managed to accommodate his pregnant frame by resizing some of his own clothes. More recently, he had begun to wear Severus’, claiming that they were big and baggy. He had to admit, his petite lover did look slightly swamped in his apparel, but there was something delicious about the sight. Harry had refused outright to wear the maternity wear Molly had sent for him, saying firmly that he’d rather walk around nude than wear the decidedly feminine garments. Harry had exclaimed angrily one morning that he was considering writing a letter to Madame Malkin to ask her why she didn’t stock maternity wear for hermaphrodites, but Severus reasoned that it was probably an empty threat brought on by erratic hormones and an inability to find anything he wanted to wear. 

Severus allowed the sales witch to help him find the section of the massive store that held his original reason for the trip, before Harry’s sore chest and Solarin’s odd call. A home birthing kit. Madame Pomfrey had assured him he could get everything in this particular shop. The sales witch led him to a row of rather large boxes. They were each the size of a picnic basket and Severus found himself selecting the one the witch recommended. She claimed it had absolutely everything, and even opened the box to ease his mind. No matter what, Severus would not be caught short during Harry’s delivery. He refused point blank to be lacking of anything that Harry might need. The witch shrunk it for him and placed it into his basket, telling him that if there was anything else he needed that wasn’t in the box, they offered an owl order delivery system.

Severus thanked her and forced himself to walk to the counter and pay for his one basket, though his gaze lingered on the fluffy white blankets strategically placed by the cash registers.

‘Good God, man, we already have a whole trunk full to overflowing of baby blankets, we need no more,’ he thought to himself as he determinedly left the store, starting to make his way over to the wizarding bank up ahead.

Solarin’s call had troubled him. Something was not right with her, he just knew it. She had been jittery during the call and she had seemed to have trouble focussing on what he was saying to her. Above all, she had requested a meeting in Diagon Alley, on the steps of Gringotts. Never in a million years had he expected her to request that. Solarin had not stepped a foot in the Wizarding World since she was eighteen. She had stayed adamant over these past four years that she would never again come back. What had prompted this sudden change? What the hell had happened to her? 

He was ripped out of his musings when a hand grabbed his hair, a wand pressed to his throat. He was backed into a shadowy alley, immediately knowing who had grabbed him by the distinctive cologne. Anger swelled inside him and he let his eyes glance at the steps of Gringotts where Solarin was sitting waiting for him, smoking a cigarette. 

It would be so easy just to let his anger overwhelm him, to let it rise to such a height that she would feel it, even all those yards away, and come to investigate. It would be all too easy to let her kill him like she wanted to. She had told him that first day, while Harry slept for a full 24 hours, that she would kill Lucius for what he had done to such a beautiful soul if she thought she could get away with it. The venom his sister had showed that day had lingered in his mind and he wanted to let her do it, wanted her to do it for his Harry, the one who had shown him that he deserved to be happy, the one he loved with all he had.

But even through his anger he wouldn’t do that, he couldn’t do that. He refused to let his baby sister become a murderer, no matter how much Lucius deserved her brand of justice.

“Let go of me, Lucius,” Severus said calmly, letting his voice take on a bored tone.

A laugh in his ear and Severus began to think that Lucius was perhaps not all that stable right now. He slipped his own wand from its wrist holster, preparing to defend himself. Years of being a spy had taught him to assess a situation before he acted.

“All this time, I never thought it would be you. I want my pet back, Severus,” Lucius snarled.

“My husband is fine where he is, thank you. After the state you left him in he will never let you near him again. And I have grown quite fond of him.”

“Neither you nor he has a choice in the matter, he his mine.”

Anger rose again in Severus and he saw Solarin twitch, glancing around before she returned to her cigarette. “No, he is mine,” Severus argued.

Lucius let go of his hair and the two former friends faced each other, their wands trained on the other ones throat. Lucius’ cold grey eyes were narrowed in suspicion.

“You want me to share him with you, Severus? I’m sure I could arrange that. Just return him to me,” Lucius said, his voice calmer now. Lucius lowered his wand, adopting a relaxed posture. He looked to Severus as if this were just an ordinary conversation, like all the ones they had shared in the past.

“No, Lucius, I will not share him. He is mine and you will not take him from me,” Severus said slowly, his wand still trained on Lucius though he had lowered it slightly.

“My little whore will be returned to me, Severus. I will not let a dirty little half-blood traitor like you get in my way,” Lucius snarled. 

“I claimed him from you, Lucius. I married him. He is mine. If you touch him I will have you locked in Azkaban, and don’t think Albus Dumbledore won’t persuade them to give you the Dementors Kiss. Surely you of all people know how much sway Albus has with the Minister,” Severus said, a promise in his voice. He watched a flicker of disappointment and then one of fear cross Lucius pale face. The pale wizard straightened his back and adjusted his clothes, putting away his wand in his cane. Severus had the urge to destroy the stick, Harry’s revelations of what Lucius had used it for clouding him momentarily.

“It is of no matter. If you want him that much, you may keep him, Severus. Consider it my gift to you, old friend” Lucius said calmly, a slight smile on his aristocratic face before his expression turned dark and dangerous. “But the child is mine. That I will not let you have, old friend. I will have my son, and Merlin help you or anyone who gets in my way.” Lucius had moved very close to Severus, invading his personal space to try and intimidate the dark wizard. “I will have my son, Severus, mark my words.”

And with that he swept away, leaving Severus angry and shaken. He leant against the wall, fighting the urge to land himself in Azkaban for murder. He needed to get back to Harry, they needed to move. Lucius was no longer an idle threat to his husband, to their son, to their happiness. The danger was real now. If Severus was correct, Lucius’ next move would be to try and get inside Spinners End, and he wasn’t sure just how long their wards would hold up against Lucius and his determination.

He picked up his shopping bags from where he had dropped them and made his way over to Solarin, keeping his wand clutched in his fist. 

“Solarin, I’m sorry for taking so long,” Severus said breathlessly, adrenaline still coursing through his system, making his heart pound. 

Solarin jumped, looking at him in surprise, and alarm bells started going off in his head. No one had ever been able to sneak up on her before, never in his entire memory could he remember it happening.

“Sol, what’s happened to you?” Severus asked, sitting down beside her. Something was wrong with her, he knew it. He knew she had asked to meet here for a reason, and that reason had no chance of being something he would like. Her knee was bouncing, and her eyes were darting around at the milling crowds.

“I can’t stay in the muggle world anymore,” she answered, her voice quiet, her eyes not meeting his.

“Why? What’s happened?”

“My control is slipping, Severus. I need help, I’m becoming unstable.”

“Since when?”

She turned to look at him, grinding her cigarette under her heel into the white step, earning a glare from one of the goblins.

“Severus, I will tell you everything, I swear. Just give me time. I’ll tell you, just later. Can you do that, can you hold off on the questions until I’m ready to tell you?” Her voice held a note of resignation, and Severus suspected that she had never wanted to tell him what she had promised to reveal.

Severus considered it. Worry for her was filling him, making even more adrenaline surge through him. Could he wait? Could he control himself until she was ready? His experience of her tempered him. If he pressed the issue she would retreat. 

“I suppose I can hold off. On the condition you tell me sometime today,” he bargained.

“All right, I’ll tell you before midnight. We should go, Draco needs my help,” Solarin agreed, standing and grabbing her bag.

“Are you sure you’re up to this, going into his head?” he asked, following her.

“I promised I would, Severus. You taught me to keep my promises. I have enough control to do this. Just don’t let a muggle near me right now, I’m not sure if I could handle it.”

The two of them made their way in silence to the Leaky Cauldron. Severus watching her become more and more steady with every witch or wizard she passed. Her using their minds to steady herself was not a good sign, it was something she had not done since she was a child. By the time they reached the pubs fireplace she seemed to be back to her old self but Severus wasn’t fooled. There was still a nervous tic in her hand. He bit his tongue and let her go through the floo first, thinking it wise to ensure her arrival before his own.

What hadn’t she told him? What had happened to her? And why did he get the feeling he wasn’t going to like what she revealed?

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Harry couldn’t remember the last time he had laughed so hard. His ribs hurt and there were tears running down his face, the baby kicking him in protest of the shaking of his body.

Sirius had finally been beaten by Draco and the blonde had proceeded to tease the stunned ex-Gryffindor until he had turned beet red in embarrassment. Remus was beside him in a similar state of glee, joining in with Draco and teasing his husband through his hilarity.

“Maybe you’re just not man enough any more. You’re losing your touch, old man,” Draco teased, dancing around the living room. Harry couldn’t remember seeing the Slytherin so happy and it made him feel that maybe everything would turn out all right after all.

He calmed himself, getting Remus to help him to his feet so he could pace to calm the baby. The rest of the room quietened down about the time the baby gave up and lay still and the four of them sat in a circle, talking about nothing in particular.

The floo sprang to life and Solarin was thrown into the room, Sirius jumping to his feet to keep her from falling. Harry felt pleased to learn that he wasn’t the only one who had trouble staying on their feet coming out of the bloody thing. Severus came through moments later and Harry gave him a wide grin, his husband letting a relieved one cross his own face momentarily. But, apparently, there wasn’t time for pleasantries.

“We need to relocate to Grimmauld Place immediately,” he said to Sirius, the Animagus releasing Solarin when it appeared she was safe on her feet. Harry noticed she looked ill, paler than usual, her dark eyes bloodshot.

“Why?” Harry asked. “What’s wrong?”

Severus dropped his shopping bags and moved to kneel before Harry, looking up at him, the rest of the room hanging on Severus’ next words. Harry let his hands slip into Severus’, positive he wasn’t going to like what came next. That feeling Draco’s happiness had created was fast disappearing and panic was beginning to take its place.

“Harry, I need you to trust me when I tell you not to panic. I won’t let anything happen to you or our son, I promise,” Severus said calmly, waiting for Harry’s nod before he continued. “I ran into Lucius while I was out. He knows where we are, love. If I’m right, he’s going to try and get in here. We need to leave, right now.”

“But he can’t have me. He’d be locked up, I belong to you. Remus said if anyone touches me like that except you then they’ll be locked up,” Harry recited, his eyes fixed on Severus’, his grip tightening. He found it slightly strange that his panic was receding, being replaced by more anger than he ever remembered feeling.

“Harry, I don’t think that this was ever about you personally. I think that Lucius’ motives for taking you and doing those things to you were based solely on your abilities, on what you could provide him with if he violated you.”

“What do you mean?”

“He doesn’t want you, love. He gave up arguing with me over you far too easily. He doesn’t want you anymore, he wants the baby. I think this has always been about the baby.”

Harry let go of Severus and wrapped his arms around his stomach. “He can’t have him. I won’t let him, he can’t have my baby. He’s mine, my baby, I won’t let that bastard take him from me,” Harry demanded angrily, shocking even Severus with his sudden fury. They had all expected him to panic at news like this, none of them had anticipated anger. Sirius noticed Solarin wince, her slightly shaking hand coming up to rub her temple.

Severus was the first to recover from his shock, having been witness to some of Harry’s more extreme mood swings. Apparently, the fact that Lucius would be thrown into Azkaban if he took the child from Harry had not occurred to Harry right then, the brunette being too angry. He decided to use this anger to his advantage.

“You’re right, Harry, he can’t have him. We won’t let him, we’ll keep our son safe. That’s why we need to move to Grimmauld Place, it’s safer there. We can protect the baby much better there than we can here,” Severus encouraged, satisfied by the determination in Harry’s eyes. He decided that Harry’s parental instincts to protect his child were their biggest asset at that moment. “What we’re going to do is this. Draco and you will go and pack our clothes, and you can show Sirius and Remus where we have put the things for the baby so they can carry them through. I will pack up my potions and Solarin will send on the owls to Grimmauld Place before retrieving her own things that she has left here. We all move quickly and it’ll be all right.”

Harry nodded and the inhabitants of the room set to their tasks, moving rapidly. Solarin sent the owls off and hurried upstairs coming down a few minutes later with a second black bag.

In less than ten minutes they were all assembled in the living room once more, shrinking their belongings and awaiting instruction from Severus.

“Right, Sirius and Remus will go first, followed by Draco. Then Solarin will go through. Someone will need to stand at the other end to catch Harry, he never has been very successful with getting out of the floo without stumbling. I don’t want his bump to topple him while he’s unsteady,” Severus instructed, breaking off when Solarin caught his attention.

“He’s outside, Severus. He’s trying to get through my wards. They won’t hold much longer,” she said.

Severus nodded and let Harry cling to him. “We need to go,” he commanded.

Sirius and Remus grabbed several shrunken bags and boxes and left, followed by Draco and then Solarin. Severus moved Harry towards the fireplace.

“Go on, I’m right behind you,” Severus urged, kissing Harry briefly before the sprite whipped out of sight. As he stepped in himself, he saw Lucius enter the room, blasting the door of its hinges, splintered wood showering the room. 

“Grimmauld Place,” he whispered, hoping he would end up in the right place, and enjoyed the look of shock and anger on Lucius face before he whipped out of sight.

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Sirius blinked to get the soot out of his eyes as he moved forwards, dropping the bags and boxes he was carrying and hearing Remus arrive behind him. He managed to get a blurry view of Draco and then Solarin arriving as well before his attention was caught by the rest of the room.

Oh God, he forgot the meeting with Albus. Half the Order was sitting around his kitchen table with Albus and the Weasley’s. Molly had been coming three times a week to get an update on Harry and to mother them. She had arrived today with Arthur, Bill and Charlie. The Order was still active, still tracking down Death Eaters, most of them had been involved in the search for Harry when he was missing. Molly looked at him strangely and Bill looked shocked, though it didn’t seem to be at him. The meeting today was meant to be about how to put Lucius behind bars.

“Fuck,” he muttered. “You have to leave, all of you. Harry…” he began 

“Too late,” Draco interrupted as Harry stumbled from the floo, Remus catching and steadying him.

Time seemed to stand still, the whole room silent. Severus arrived a moment later and breathed a sigh of relief before he too looked around in shock. Sirius watched Harry, waiting for a reaction from the Gryffindor. All eyes in the room were fixed on his godson, all waiting with baited breath.

Harry looked around the room, still allowing himself to grip at Remus. Severus arrived behind him and he couldn’t quite decide what he wanted to do. Severus was here, he was safe, he knew that. But there were so many of them, all watching him. He began to list them silently in his head, thinking hard facts of the situation might help blanket the slight panic that was making his heart beat faster.

Professor Dumbledore, Mad-Eye Moody, Kingsley Shacklebolt, Tonks, Molly, Arthur, Bill, Charlie. It did actually help slightly and he found himself breathing a little easier.

He supposed it could have been worse, there could have been more of them. Or they could have all surged forwards to try and hold him. His wand was stowed in his pocket and he found its weight against his leg comforting.

“Harry, are you all right, love?” came Severus’ voice. He let go of Remus and backed up a few steps, Severus’ arms coming around him, his hands coming up to grip his lovers sleeve.

“I’m all right. I just need a few minutes,” Harry mumbled, though he knew Severus could hear him. His husband had never missed anything from him yet.

“Take all the time you need, no rush. We can ask them to leave if you want,” Severus soothed in his ear, his voice low. “Talk to me, love. Tell me what you want.”

Harry swallowed. It was okay, no one was looking at him like he was a freak. Dumbledore, Tonks and Molly were even smiling reassuringly at him, looking pleased to see him. He took a deep breath.

“I think I want a cup of tea. The baby didn’t like the floo,” Harry said simply, earning a chuckle from his lover.

“Molly, could we have some tea, please? It has been a rather stressful day thus far,” Severus announced, following Harry as he timidly moved to the table, taking the seat next to him. Harry had chosen to sit next to Albus and Severus found it incredible how well Harry had just handled that unexpected experience. He had felt for sure that Harry would panic, but his husband had surprised him once again. Where had Harry’s panic gone? Severus could honestly say he didn’t miss it one bit. Though Harry still had his moments, this more confident Harry was closer to the fearless boy he had fallen for in the beginning, the one who had accidentally invaded his mind one Saturday evening. That had been a crush for him, maybe something a little more, but it had grown and now he couldn’t imagine living without his husband, without waking up with him huddled to his chest, without that smile, those green eyes. He knew that Harry would never be the way he was, not fully. He knew that Solarin had been right that first morning when she had said that part of Harry would always be in that room. But this new Harry was calmer, more grounded. This Harry smiled. That was enough.

And he loved every bit of him.

He accepted his tea from Molly and set about recounting the mornings events, his attention more focussed on his sister and the effect she was having on the rest of the room than what he was saying. 

Mad-Eye was looking at Solarin suspiciously and Severus found it only reinforced his worry. Mad-Eye had been the one to train Solarin, when she was still able to count her age on her two hands. It had been necessary to teach her to restrain herself and Solarin had loved the grizzled wizard, delighting in the fact that he had been the only person she had ever met who’s mind and emotion she had no reading of. Moody had been too powerful for her to get inside his head and he had instilled his own control in her. She could probably get inside it now, now that she was older and more powerful. That Mad-Eye looked suspicious of her agitated behaviour made Severus fear for his sister more than before. 

Tonks seemed to be delighted to see Solarin. Severus remembered that they had been friends at school and found it to be the expected response from the excitable young Auror. But Bill’s reaction was bewildering.

Bill was looking at Solarin intently, the dark haired witch avoiding his gaze. Bill himself looked a bit green and he had taken to rubbing his temple every now and then in apparent pain. Severus remembered the two of them being close at Hogwarts but this interaction between the two made him suspicious. He felt like he was missing something important and he got the feeling that this was one of the things his sister had declined in telling him.

He finished his tale and to his surprise the conversation fell to how they could get Lucius put in Azkaban. He glanced at his husband, finding that Harry seemed to be accepting of the conversation, and continued his observation of the room.

Strangely, Kingsley Shacklebolt looked uneasy, guilty even. Severus wondered what Kingsley had done to elicit his embarrassed look for he could never remember it ever having happened before. Kingsley was confident, self-assured. Severus couldn’t remember anything having made the wizard feel in the wrong before. Kingsley had never looked like that previously and he couldn’t quite figure out why the shamefaced glances of the black wizard seemed mostly directed at him. 

He tried to suppress a smirk. Charlie was looking lustily at his godson, the blonde seemingly oblivious of the attention he was gathering from the redhead. It amused him no end that a dragon tamer was interested in Draco. Wouldn’t that just be the icing on the cake, elite Pureblooded Draco ending up with supposed blood traitor Charlie? Well, if they could ever figure out what was wrong with the Slytherin that is.

Arthur was absorbed in the conversation, as were Sirius, Remus and Albus. Molly seemed to be having trouble restraining herself from hugging his husband but he was grateful she was keeping herself to herself. He wasn’t quite sure if Harry would stand for it after all that days events.

The conversation was beginning to wind down, turning to opinions of the state of the Ministry and certain laws, Quidditch creeping in as well, and he let his eyes land on his sister fully. Merlin, she looked awful. No wonder Moody was suspicious. She really did look like death now, her already pale skin seeming to be made of ice, her dark eyes bloodshot and her long black hair hanging limp. She had declined sitting at the table, choosing instead to lean against the sink. She had fixed her stare on the wall opposite. The tic in her hand had faded but she still looked agitated, picking nervously at the hem of her top.

“Sirius, do you have a pain potion or a pepper up potion or something. Solarin looks a little ill.” 

The room went silent as Harry spoke up and Sirius chuckled. Solarin managed a weak grin and accepted the pain potion without complaint. Severus found comfort in the fact that he wasn’t the only one who thought she looked off colour.

He rested his hand on Harry’s knee under the table in encouragement, feeling the sprite grip his hand and bring their joined hands to rest atop the table. It garnered a few odd looks but it mostly went unnoticed.

“Severus,” Harry said quietly, Severus leaning in to hear him over the hum of renewed conversation about broomsticks.

“What is it, love?”

“We missed lunch,” Harry said shyly.

“Ah.” He glanced at Harry’s watch, noting that it was almost two, and turned to the room again, running his thumb along the back of Harry’s hand, feeling the scars Delores Umbridge had caused. Horrible woman. Harry never lied, it just wasn’t in him to be dishonest. “Molly, we missed lunch in our need for a speedy exit. I wonder if you would be kind enough to rustle something up?”

Molly looked positively ecstatic and Severus barely concealed his grin at the huge portion she placed in front of Harry, his lovers eyes going wide.

“Just eat what you can, love. I’m sure she won’t be offended,” Severus reassured at Harry’s apprehension of the large slab of chicken pie in front of him. Severus had always kept his helpings small, increasing them slowly as Harry’s appetite had increased. Compared to what Harry was used to, the plate looked like a three course meal.

The meal continued on without incident, Harry managing a healthy quarter of the huge portion. As the afternoon wore on, Kingsley took his leave and the other inhabitants moved off into smaller groups, amusing themselves with their own conversations.

Harry sat between Severus and Dumbledore, listening to the conversation on potions between the two, Arthur, Charlie and Draco chipping in occasionally. It mostly washed over him, the baby’s kicking distracting him. He tried rubbing his hand along his bump, hoping it would placate his child but finally gave up.

“Severus, I need to pace. The baby didn’t like the floo at all,” Harry said, making Arthur and Charlie jump.

Severus got to his feet and let Harry use him to hoist himself up. Severus had told him he really wasn’t that big in the bump department but it didn’t help him any. He reasoned that he had been small to begin with. He was finding it harder to get around, especially when getting in and out of chairs. He felt like he had swallowed a quaffle. 

Severus sat back down at his insistence and he began to pace, keeping his steps slow and steady. He let his eyes wander as he paced, letting it all wash over him. It wasn’t all that bad really, being in a room with so many people. As long as Severus didn’t decide to leave the room anytime soon he would be fine. Sirius and Remus were in deep conversation with Molly, and Harry caught the word nursery. He moved away from them, not wanting to join. He was feeling grouchy all of a sudden and he didn’t think he would have anything helpful to add.

Moody was in conversation with Bill, though the curse breaker didn’t seem to be listening very closely, he had to keep getting Moody to repeat himself. Bill kept glancing at Solarin and Harry felt that he was missing something. From the way Severus kept glancing at the augur, he figured Severus suspected something as well.

Solarin was looking more animated now, she and Tonks leaning against the sink, engaged in conversation that led to frequent girly giggles. He stared at the three of them, Tonks, Solarin, and Bill. He knew they had all been at school together, and they had been friends. He could see how they had influenced each other by the way they all dressed. The three of them wouldn’t have looked out of place at a rock concert. He noticed that they all wore a dangling fang from one ear, the two females wearing plain silver hoops in the other ears. He wondered when they had all had them done, if they all had them done together. He wondered where they had spent their time at Hogwarts if Solarin had been a Slytherin. Had they sat by the lake, side by side? Had they visited Hagrid together?

It hit him like a tidal wave, the sudden need. He missed Hermione and Ron, missed the way they would spend afternoons in the common room talking about nothing at all, missed the warm afternoons sitting by the lake in the shade of a tree.

The sight of four red heads in the same room as him brought tears to his eyes and he damned his hormones as they began to spill. Damn it, he was standing in the middle of the kitchen, crying for no apparent reason. Sometimes he really hated being pregnant. He saw Solarin glance at him and move to Severus, Harry thankful that she could read his longings so easily.

“Severus, Harry’s crying,” Solarin whispered in her brothers ear. Severus moved fast, gathering Harry in his arms. 

She tried to ignore Bill as he looked at her again, longing in his eyes. No, she needed a clear head right now, if she was ever going to be able to read Draco today.

“Talk to me, love. Come on, tell me what brought this on,” Severus urged, stroking Harry’s unruly hair that was in dire need of a trim.

“I just…I was watching Solarin and Tonks….and Bill…and I…” Harry gasped between sobs. Severus was well aware of every eye in the room on them, watching in concern as his husband sobbed. Well, all except Bill who was watching Solarin. Molly seemed actually terrified of Harry’s unexplained sadness. That woman really was too mothering at times, she of all people should realise that Harry’s hormones were wild at the moment.

“You were thinking of your own friends,” Severus supplied.

Harry nodded against his chest.

“Would you like to see them?”

Another nod. 

“When, love?”

“Can I see them tomorrow, Severus? It’s Saturday tomorrow, they won’t have to miss lessons,” Harry mumbled reasonably.

Severus kissed the top of his head and turned to Molly, who had timidly moved closer to them

“Would it be possible to pull Ron and Hermione out of Hogwarts for a day?” Severus asked, Molly looking to Albus.

“I don’t see a problem. When?” Albus asked lightly, though Severus could see that even he was shaken by the sudden bout of tears. Maybe he had just become too used to Harry’s sudden and often unexplained changes in mood to be shaken by them.

“Tomorrow. It’s possible to bring them here for the day?”

“Of course. Minerva and I shall arrange it tonight. Is that all right, Harry?” Albus asked kindly, passing the Gryffindor a handkerchief. 

“Thank you, Professor,” Harry mumbled, wiping away his tears. “Sorry, everyone. It’s my hormones,” he said to the room and Molly actually let out a sigh. Harry glanced at Severus and stepped out of his embrace, letting Molly hug him lightly before he returned to Severus’ arms, his lover telling him he was proud of how well he was taking all this.

It only lasted a few seconds and it was extortionately light but it seemed to be enough for Molly. She walked around with a smile for the rest of the day.

The afternoon passed quite smoothly after that.

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Solarin locked herself in the bathroom and upped a silencing spell before she screamed. Even with the pain potion, her head felt like it was about to split open. She hunched over the toilet and vomited up the little food she had managed to force down at lunch.

Her control was holding, albeit by a thread, despite the pain. She had seen the looks Mad-Eye had given her and she knew he had identified something was wrong with her. She had been foolish to think that she could hide it from him. Good God, the man had put her discipline there in the first place, of course he would recognise its flaws. And Severus’ questions wouldn’t hold off for much longer.

She pulled her toothbrush from her bag and scrubbed her mouth, trying to abolish the awful taste. She had just finished rinsing when there was a knock at the door. She seriously considered ignoring it. Severus and Moody would never shove their way into the bathroom while she was in there, no matter how overbearing they could be, and there were other bathrooms in the house, whoever needed to pee could use one of those.

“I know you heard that knock, Arin.”

Damn it. Why did it have to be Bill, of all people, why him? Anyone else she could have ignored happily, but she never had been able to pull away from him willingly.

“I know you’re in there.”

Why was he doing this? She had been ignoring him quite successfully all afternoon, why now was he making it difficult for her?

“Arin…”

His voice was teasing now, and she felt herself move to the door. Cursing herself she turned the lock and stepped out, hefting her bag as she stepped through the doorway. She avoided his eyes but apparently that wasn’t what he wanted.

He grasped her arm as she passed and pulled her back, Solarin dropping her bag in the hall, Bill locking the door behind them as he entered the bathroom with her. Her arm tingled where he touched her and she pulled away as if she had been burned, they both did. He faced her head on, positioned between her and the door. It wouldn’t really stop her if she really wanted out but it did create an obstacle.

“Will you talk to me now? Now that it’s just me and you?” Bill questioned, leaning against the door, crossing his arms in an attempt to stop himself reaching out and touching her again.

“What do you want?” she asked, her tone resigned as she leaned against the sink on the opposite side of the room, putting clear distance between them.

“I want to know why you’re here. I thought you were never coming back to the wizarding world. You said that, Arin. Your words exactly. You said never. Why are you here?”

“I changed my mind,” she said, shrugging. 

“Liar.” She glanced up at his smirk and smirked herself, though she didn’t meet his eyes. She never had been able to lie to him, not once their connection had solidified. “I’ll let it slide. Just tell me something honestly, will you?”

“What?”

“Tell me why the connection kept opening during lunch. I didn’t open it, Arin, you were opening it. What happened to you? I felt your pain. I don’t think I’ve ever felt anything like that from you. It scared me,” he admitted.

She looked up into his eyes in concern and immediately wished she hadn’t. Merlin, those beautiful baby blues got to her every time. “Did I hurt you?” she asked, her voice low.

“No, it was just fleeting, but I felt it. Tell me, Arin. Just tell me. Is it what they did to you? Is it still affecting you? Is that why you’re slipping?”

She didn’t want to say it, didn’t want him to react the way she knew he would but she couldn’t help it. He had always managed to handle her in just the right way.

“Yes,” she whispered and she watched as he came forwards. There was a scant few inches between them now, she could feel his body heat. She looked up into those blue eyes and felt herself losing her resolve. She was slipping and she couldn’t seem to find the will to stop it. She reached out and placed a hand on his chest, their eyes locked.

She let her barriers drop and felt him do the same, their minds brushing against each other. Suddenly there was no pain, no nausea, nothing at all, just his mind, his calm, his control. She let it take hold, let his mind take control of hers as his hands came up to land on the small of her back. Passions ignited and she let him take her in a rough kiss, almost animalistic in its need. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he slammed her roughly against the wall, cracking tiles, swooping in to litter her throat with vicious looking bites. She heard him utter a familiar charm, her skin glowing faintly blue for a second, before he chucked their wands away. They fumbled with zippers and buttons, the two of them only half undressed when he pushed into her, their eyes locked.

[Mine] came his possessive thought into her head as he began to take her, as rough as they had been the very last time, when the need to mark each other had overtaken them. It didn’t take them long to reach the edge, the two of them balancing precariously before her reply sent them spiralling down.

[Yours.]

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Severus was faintly amused by the identical blushes on Bill and Solarin as they exited the bathroom, only to find him right outside the door, leaning against the wall with Moody at his side. His amusement didn’t quite cover the sudden urge he had to maim the redhead, but he refrained. He could get him later. Severus had his arms crossed for good measure and felt extremely fulfilled when Bill scurried away, leaving Solarin to deal with her brother and her mentor alone.

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Harry found himself in the spare bedroom next to his own room surrounded by tins of paint, Molly holding up colour charts to the walls, Charlie sorting through the brushes, Bill looking distracted. Remus and Draco were serving as his anchor for the moment, the two of them surveying the scene with something between horror and amusement, Draco leaning more towards horror. Severus had taken one look at the rattling glasses and plates in the kitchen, given one dark look at Moody and disappeared upstairs, the Auror trailing behind him. Moody had been wearing a dirty kind of smirk and Harry had noticed that his electric blue magical eye had been fixed on the ceiling. Severus had snarled that he needed to “Have a talk with my sister,” and Harry had let him go, letting Remus and Draco be the ones to reassure in his absence. It had amused him, slightly, the sudden anger from his husband about what Solarin might be doing. They had all seen Bill follow her out. It amused him more that it took both Remus and Draco to partially replace Severus’ reassuring presence by his side.

He and Severus had decided to take Harry’s bedroom as their own, and Draco had claimed Sirius’ brother Regulus’ old bedroom, saying that he liked the Slytherin green. Severus had reasoned that Solarin would probably take one in the furthest corner of the house, far away from other inhabitants. Harry had questioned it and Moody had told him that Solarin had a tendency to walk through other peoples minds while she slept. It had not comforted him to think that she could see his dreams.

When Severus had left and Tonks had claimed the attentions of Sirius, Arthur and Albus, Molly had suggested maybe it would make him feel more at home if they decorated the nursery. He had found that he had really liked the idea of getting ready for the baby’s arrival, now only a month away. Strangely, he didn’t feel as worried about the birth as he felt he should have been. He supposed Severus’ gentle reassurances about it were doing the trick.

“So, what colour do you like?” Molly asked.

“Ummm, I don’t know,” Harry admitted, his voice timid.

“I like the pale green,” Draco said.

“Of course you would,” Charlie joked. Harry noticed the way he was looking at the Slytherin, his gaze lust filled yet teasing. “Red’s nice. Red for a Gryffindor baby.”

Harry smiled and Remus chuckled beside him. “It’s too soon to speculate houses, boys. I think the powder blue is nice. Blue for a boy,” Remus offered.

Harry wrinkled his nose. “Isn’t that a little predictable?” he asked the werewolf, gaining more confidence. “It’s nice but it just seems too conventional. I bet everyone has blue for a boy. I want it to be special. My baby’s special, I want him to have a special room.”

The inhabitants of the room smiled at him. “What about purple?” Molly suggested. “Or maybe yellow?”

Harry took the two colour cards from her, his gaze lingering on the yellow. It was a nice colour, powdery, soft. It reminded him of happiness, of the way he felt when he was with Severus. But the purple was nice too, it was a kind of lavender, it was very soothing.

Bill seemed to be staying out of it. He found himself more focussed on the savage looking bite mark on Bill’s neck than on the colours.

“I like the yellow,” Harry declared finally and he watched as Molly thrust a brush into each of their hands and charmed the plain white paint to the colour on the card. Harry noticed that she had not given him a brush. “Mrs. Weasley, why don’t I get a brush?” Harry asked, wondering why he was left out.

“You’re pregnant, dear. It’s best if you direct, tell us if we miss any bits. Besides, I can’t see Severus taking too kindly to me letting you loose with a paintbrush or letting you up a ladder. He seems rather protective. Personally, I think it’s sweet, but don’t tell him I said that. And call me Molly,” she finished with a kind smile.

She directed Harry to the chair near the door and he found himself content to let them get on with it. His back was aching and it felt nice to be sitting once more. He burst out laughing at the look on Draco’s face.

“Come on, Draco, it’s just a bit of paint,” Charlie teased, his attention drawn to the blonde by Harry’s sudden laughter.

“I’ve never painted a room before, the House Elves did it. Won’t I get all messy?” Draco replied, eyeing the tin of paint warily.

“Half the fun. But look at it this way. Paint washes off, but I don’t think the bite on Bill’s neck will disappear that easily,” Charlie teased, Bill turning bright red. Draco smirked and began to paint, though he was careful not to get any on himself.

“It’s none of your business,” Bill said, eyeing his amused mother with a scowl. “Oh, for the love of Merlin! Go on then, you get one free shot without me getting you back for it,” Bill sighed, leaning against one unpainted wall, waiting.

“We all knew you’d find someone, but damn, we didn’t know you were suicidal. Snape’s sister? He’s going to kill you, mate,” Charlie chuckled, thoroughly enjoying the chance to niggle his younger brother.

“She’ll be able to handle him.” Bill looked at Harry, suddenly uncertain of Solarin’s skill in handling her brother. “You won’t let him kill me, will you, Harry?”

“I’ll try but I make no promises. The two of them are close,” Harry admitted, smiling at the way the redheads face dropped.

“Admit it, bro, you like the danger. You became a curse breaker ‘cause you like the thrill. No wonder Moody was looking at the ceiling and the dishes started shaking. I remember you two flirting in school. All those years of all that tension, it’s a miracle the house is still standing.”

Bill actually laughed at that one and Harry found himself relaxing fully into the experience of preparing for parenthood.

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“Hi,” Solarin said innocently, trying to pull up her collar to hide the vicious looking bite marks, and Severus was surprised to see that she looked better than she had all day. Though, the observation didn’t help dissipate the murderous urges he had. “You know, I should go and help with dinner,” she said, trying to walk past them.

“Nice try, girly, Molly gave that job to Arthur and Sirius. We need a little talk,” Moody growled and the three of them made their way to the living room. Solarin sat down but the two men remained standing, making her feel like she was in an interrogation. She just knew that neither of them would accept a lie right now, even if they did believe her. They were muttering quietly to each other and she figured she had a few minutes before their attentions focussed on her.

The only thing she was thankful for was her control being firmly back in place, and the sound of Bill’s voice as they spoke through the connection.

[Sorry to bail] Bill said, apologetically.

[Understandable. I would have done the same if they had given me the chance. Wish me luck, I’m about to be interrogated. I’ll be shocked if they don’t threaten me with a truth serum at least once. What are you doing?]

[I was ambushed by mum on my way to the kitchen. I’m in the nursery with Harry, Draco, mum, Charlie and Remus, painting. I think Harry’s going to go for the yellow or the purple. Draco wants green and Remus wants blue. Charlie’s suggesting red. I’m staying out of it.]

[Five sickles says I get released before you do…] she replied teasingly. Moody and Severus seemed to be done with their conversation and they were moving to the chairs opposite. It seemed her time was up.

[You’re on. See you soon, hopefully.]

[I love you, Bill, don’t you love me too?]

A pleased mental chuckle. [I love you, Arin. All my heart and soul.]

And then his voice was gone, the sweep of his mind his fleeting goodbye before his mind receded from hers, their barriers slipping back into place. She was relieved to feel that her own control was better than it had been in years. It wasn’t something that had ever happened before but she found she wasn’t really surprised that his mind had stabilised hers better than Moody’s training had ever done.

“So,” Severus began, claiming her attention. “Why is your discipline slipping?”

“It’s not anymore. I got a handle on it,” she replied.

“How?”

“I have my own methods.”

Moody smirked at her. Severus looked murderous.

“So, Bill helped you with it?” Moody said delicately, looking pointedly at her throat.

“Yes,” she replied, not looking at Severus, her hand coming up to cover the wounds. “We have a connection, I talk to him through it. It stabilised me, having his mind open to mine. He helped me.”

“Why was it slipping?” Severus asked, grasping the chance to move away from the topic of his sister having sex in the bathroom.

She sighed. “You’re not going to like it, Severus,” she warned. “Are you sure you want to know?”

Severus seemed to consider the question. “Yes. I want to know,” he replied finally, though he didn’t look all that sure to her.

“All right, but don’t say I didn’t warn you.” She took a deep breath and braced herself for the onslaught of emotions that were bound to happen. “You remember me registering myself with the Ministry like I was supposed to?” They nodded. “It was you who told me about it, Severus. I believed you when you told me it was the best way to protect myself. You believed it yourself. While I was there the Ministry tried to figure out how I work. They did some…damage.”

Guilt coursed off her brother in waves. Moody looked furious, but there was an echo of regret.

“Stop it, both of you. It was my choice to register. Stop feeling guilty and regretful,” she snapped. “The damage they did lingered. I didn’t realise their rules were so sneaky.”

“Explain,” barked Moody. Ah, there he was, the grumpy man she knew and loved.

“Their rules state that once I’m registered the only way to back out of it is to live in the muggle world. Fine, in theory. But muggle minds are too weak, their thoughts project. The damage they did was just reinforced by the muggle minds.”

“Effectively forcing you to return,” Severus said, it all clicking into place. “What would have happened if you had not left when you did, or if you had not returned to us today?”

“The damage would have turned inwards. My abilities would have inverted, tearing my mind apart. I would have gone crazy and, eventually, it would have killed me. Forced Recall on my own mind.”

The room was silent in their shock and Solarin could hear the echo of Bill laughing in her head, something Charlie had said was entertaining him. His barriers had slipped a little. She pressed the thought of learning a little self discipline into his head and the laughter stopped abruptly. 

[You love it.] came Bill’s reply, after a second.

[Not when they’re about to get to talking about me and you and the bathroom incident.] She felt his sudden embarrassment and a slight fear of Severus doing him serious damage. [Relax,] she soothed. [I can handle Severus. By the time dinner rolls round, he’ll be cool with it.] She paused. [I think.]

[I hope you’re right. I don’t fancy dying today. Harry did go for the yellow, by the way.]

[No fear. Besides, I haven’t even got to teasing him about his marriage yet. Nice colour choice. I’ll explain why later. Gotta go, they’re coming out of their shocked silences. Remember, discipline.]

Barriers back up, she looked Severus in the eye. His eyes were heartbreaking as they looked at her and she wanted to reassure him, but she knew that any comforting words she offered would just make him feel worse so she stayed silent.

“How are you feeling now? Your control is steady?” Severus asked.

“I feel fine. Actually, I feel better than I have in years. And my control is well in place, steady as a rock. But, I’m not a fool. I know what’s coming next. I’m ready, Mad-Eye,” she said calmly, settling herself more firmly into her seat.

Mad-Eye stood up and limped over, his magical eye swirling madly but his other eye was steadily fixed on her. He pulled out his wand and pointed it at her.

“You know that I’d never let anyone but you do this, right?” she said to him.

“I know. You took your lessons to heart. You and Nymphadora, best two students I’ve ever had. Ready?” Moody grizzled at her. It was probably the closest to real emotion she had ever heard him express. She nodded. “Legilimens!”

She felt the spell hit her, but it was not how she remembered it. It merely glanced her mind instead of invading it the way he had once been able to. Apparently, her control was better than it ever had been. 

Moody looked at Severus. “I can’t get in. That control is iron clad now. I don’t think even another augur could get into her head. Whatever Bill did, it worked, better than my training ever did. If that’s all, I should go and inform Dumbledore. He will want to know that the situation is resolved,” Moody grizzled, walking to the door.

“She is safe to go into Draco’s head?” Severus questioned. Solarin liked to think that there was maybe a little admiration in his inky stare, under all the anger and guilt that is.

“Perfectly safe.”

“Then I require your assistance no longer. My sister and I need a chat alone.” The threat was clear in his voice and Solarin felt her amusement grow. Moody left them to it with a smirk.

Severus fixed her with his best Scary Professor glare, the one that had worked on her when she was younger. She knew she was pushing him to his limit when she pulled out a packet of cigarettes from her pocket, lighting one.

“I’m going to choose to ignore the carcinogens for now, but don’t think I like it,” he snarled.

“Come on then, hit me with the lecture,” she said, earning a scowl.

“We’re going to talk and you will answer me honestly, or so help me, Solarin Eileen Snape, I will find some truth serum.”

She smirked. There it was. “Go ahead.”

“When the hell did you and Bill decide that you would do…that in the bathroom?”

“We didn’t, it just happened.”

“Someone touching my sister does not just happen!”

“Look, it’s not like I’ve just met the guy. Me and Bill were together before.”

His eyes narrowed and she considered that maybe that had not been the wisest thing to say. Lying to Severus now was not an option. He would see right through it.

“When?” he asked, his voice eerily calm.

“In school.”

“How old were you when you first allowed him to put his grubby little paws on you?”

“I was in my fifth year, he was in his sixth. Halloween weekend.”

Dear God, he looked like he was about to explode. She was sure he was about to have a stroke or a heart attack or something along those lines. He didn’t seem able to form a sentence at that moment.

[Stay away from the living room right now. Severus looks livid.] she pushed into Bill’s mind.

“You weren’t even fucking legal! In either world! What the fuck were you thinking? You were fourteen! And how the bloody hell did I not notice the two of you?” Severus yelled, leaping to his feet, and Solarin could feel surprise throughout the house. Ah, no silencing charms. Footsteps were approaching. Sirius.

“Calm down, you’re attracting the attentions of other people in the house,” she said. Sirius’ head poked around the door. 

“Is everything all right in here?” Sirius asked.

“Everything’s fine. Just a little sibling issue. We’ll be fine,” Solarin answered, relieved when the Animagus left.

“Severus, listen to yourself. You’re being a little out there,” she said, trying not to laugh in the face of his rage. That would not do her any good. She stubbed out her cigarette in a saucer that someone had left on the coffee table.

“Answer me.”

“No, I wasn’t legal. I was pretty much thinking about how I felt about him. You didn’t notice because we didn’t want you to. Ask Tonks, she was around us all the time and she never noticed that we were more than friends. It was about us, no one else.”

“He’s bitten you to pieces.”

She looked pointedly at his neck, where there was a bight red hickey. He had the good grace to look momentarily sheepish. 

“And the bathroom?” he questioned.

“Be thankful we weren’t on the kitchen table, giving you all a show,” she said honestly, and he shuddered.

“He’s not good enough for you. No where near. Completely unsuitable. I won’t stand for it. He’s using you, I can see it even if you can’t,” Severus said, somewhat calmer now. Apparently she had managed to shock him with her answers. 

Her temper ignited at the mere notion of Bill using her and she leapt to her feet, advancing on him until his back was pressed against the bookcase.

“You listen to me and you listen good. I would never, ever let anyone use me. It’s insulting and condescending for you to even think that. And Bill is a good man, he’s my good man. He would never use me even if he could. If you think for a single second that I will sit here and take that from you, you’re losing your touch,” she snarled at him.

“He’s not good enough,” Severus spat.

“That is not your call.”

“So, what? Am I supposed to just accept this?”

“I don’t really give a damn what you do. But I’m with Bill whether you like it or not. Don’t make me choose, Severus. Quite honestly I can’t tell you which one of you would win.”

This seemed to make Severus deflate and he silently left the room, determined. She followed him up to the room next to Harry’s, where Draco and Charlie were frozen in their flinging paint at each other. Bill shrank back against the wall furthest from the door and all the other people in the room watched it play out, Harry looking interested at the fury oozing out of Severus.

“I want a word with you. Not now, later, when I’m less likely to throttle you,” Severus said, pointing at Bill. The redhead nodded mutely. “Hurt her in any way and I will make you suffer.”

And with that, it was over. Severus stalked from the room, shutting himself in the bathroom. Solarin suspected that he had upped a silencing spell. Bill slid down the wall, shaking in fear and Solarin let him avoid her touch for the time being.

‘Well,’ she thought to herself, ‘that was practically a happy moment.’

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Draco was finding it hard to swallow. Arthur’s vegetable stew was good, even if it had ended up having to be saved from burning by Molly, but it just didn’t seem to want to go down.

Solarin had said that she would read him after dinner and his nerves were getting the better of him.

“Draco, are you all right?” Harry asked from across the table.

“I’m fine,” he replied, though from the looks he received, he wasn’t very convincing.

Solarin passed Draco another roll from where she sat to his left. “Try to relax. Don’t worry about it,” she soothed. Then she got this mischievous glint in her eyes. She winked at Draco before turning to look at her brother.

“Funny, Severus, you didn’t seem to be inclined to talk about your own relationship when you were harassing me about mine,” she said, her carrying voice causing all the tables inhabitants to look between the two siblings. Harry seemed to be suddenly perky.

“We were discussing you and not me,” Severus said defensively.

“Does that mean that I can talk about you now?”

“You wouldn’t dare.”

“Oh really? Let me just take this moment to say…I told you so,” she sing-songed. Severus looked embarrassed and Draco realized what she was doing. She was distracting him. And it was working.

“Shut up, Solarin.”

“Told him so about what?” Harry asked, playing along with her, enjoying her making his husband squirm in embarrassment beside him. She seemed to do it so easily. Maybe if he asked her nicely, she would show him how to do it.

“Solarin, you wouldn’t dare,” Severus warned. She ignored the threat.

“The morning he found you, when he was healing you, he asked me to read you. Well, I told him that you had feelings for him, told him what I found in your head. He didn’t believe me.” She put her hand to her head in a move of mocking and Severus glowered at her. “Oh, woe is me, I’m so miserable. Poor Professor Snape, I don’t deserve to be happy, I’m such a terrible human being. I don’t deserve to find love.”

The whole table laughed at her and Harry had to let Severus pull him from his own seat into his lap so that Severus could hide his face against Harry’s back.

“What was it you used to say about marriage, Severus?” Severus seemed to be trying to melt into his chair, or maybe into Harry’s spine, and Sirius was clutching his sides in laughter. “Ah yes, you said that it was a pathetic insipid construct for the feeble and narrow minded. Funny how you look reeeeal happy wearing that ring. I thought you said you would never get married, you’d rather face a firing squad.”

“I hadn’t met Harry when I said that,” Severus mumbled, Harry giggling, though he stroked the arms that were wrapped around him.

“It all worked out, the two of them got there, in the end,” Bill added, trying to help Severus escape Solarin’s clutches. But even being teased to the point of complete mortification had not helped Severus let go of his rage. His head shot up from its hiding place.

“If I were you, I would shut it right now,” he snarled at the curse breaker.

“You know what, you’re being unfair, Severus,” Solarin intervened.

“No, I’m not. I think that, considering he’s fucking my sister, I’m entitled to be a little pissed off.”

“Harry’s fucking my brother, you don’t see me threatening to kill him,” Solarin said as she angrily pushed away her plate. She threw an apologetic look at Harry, who merely smiled at her, shaking his head slightly to indicate that he didn’t mind his activities with his husband being mentioned, as long as it was brief. Draco got the impression that Harry thought Severus was overreacting just a tad. 

Severus released Harry and made sure he was safely back in his own chair before he replied. The whole room had swiftly gone silent at the abrupt anger between the two brunettes, all traces of their teasing gone.

“That is different,” Severus replied.

“Why? Because you’re older? Would it make a difference if I was older than Bill? Would it make a difference if I was older than you?”

“No, I would still want to hurt him.”

“Oh, so it’s because I’m a girl?”

“No.”

“Well then you’re going to have to clear this one up for me, Severus, because I don’t understand. Why is it okay for you to be with Harry and not okay for me to be with Bill?” Her stare was accusing but he didn’t back down from it.

“It is not that simple,” he answered, his voice low and dangerous.

“Why not? Make it simple.”

“Fine. I will.”

Severus stood from the table abruptly and stalked round to Bill. He grabbed him by the scruff of the neck and half dragged him out of the door, throwing a meaningful look at Sirius, who grabbed Solarin as she tried to follow them.

“Trust me, he just wants to talk to him. He won’t kill him,” Sirius assured.

“How can you say that? Did you see him?” she argued.

“Because I did the exact same thing. When I had calmed down enough to be rational I took your brother aside and asked him a few things. He just wants to be sure that you’re not going to get hurt. Leave them be,” Sirius reassured.

She relented and retook her seat, albeit reluctantly. Now she was the one who needed distracting.

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Severus threw Bill into the living room and locked the door, upping a silencing spell. Damnit, everyone had heard him yelling at Solarin, he would not be caught off guard again. He looked at the younger man and noticed the bite mark on his throat. It did not help to see it.

“I need to know some things before I even begin to accept the two of you. I can’t ask Solarin, I just keep losing my temper. So, you have to answer my questions. And keep that damn connection closed. This is between me and you,” Severus snarled, beginning to pace to try and calm himself. It seemed to calm the baby when Harry paced, he reasoned, it might work for him, though it didn’t seem to be working at the moment.

Bill nodded and Severus contemplated what he needed to know first.

“Just tell me that the two of you were safe.”

“I never hurt her, it might have gotten a little rough but she never really got hurt,” Bill answered, his eyes sincere.

“I didn’t mean that but it is slightly reassuring to know you’ve never ended up getting too carried away and maiming my sister. I meant when you are together, you have taken precautions, haven’t you? There isn’t a secret abortion that I don’t know about?” Severus asked, trying not to blush. It was the least comfortable conversation he had ever had and he prayed he would never have to have it again, or anything like it. He was just thankful that he was managing not to stutter.

“No, there isn’t. We’ve always been careful, and we always will be. No matter how caught up we are, we always remember to cast that charm.”

“She was fourteen, Bill. She wasn’t fifteen until February and you turned sixteen the week before you ended up in bed together. Did you not consider the illegality of your actions?”

He found it oddly satisfying to see the redhead pale. Seemingly, Bill hadn’t realized Solarin had told him that.

“Not at the time, no, I didn’t. At the time, it was just about me and her.”

Severus sighed at his honesty. This was getting harder, Bill’s openness and integrity getting to him.

“Are you using her?”

“No! I would never use her. I understand that she’s special. But I will never hurt her, I swear it, Professor.”

Damnit, he was being so sincere that Severus felt his anger dissolve, leaving only a need to know. He sat down in a chair, beckoning Bill to sit opposite him.

“I need to know how you feel about her, Bill. I need to hear you say it. And I need to know how you restored her control,” Severus admitted. Bill sat down and looked Severus straight in the eye.

“I love her. It’s probably not something I should be admitting to her big brother, but I have never been with anyone but her. I never wanted anyone but her.” He laughed. “You of all people must be able to see how hard an act she is to follow?”

Severus allowed himself his own snort at Bill’s accurate analysis.

“I love her, I’ve been in love with her since I was fourteen years old. And I would have come to you and asked your permission if I had known who her big brother was. So, I’m asking it now. I love her, I want her, only her. I swear to you that I will never hurt her in any way, and I will never let anyone hurt her. I’m asking your permission for me to be with her, and if you say no, I’ll stay away, I swear it.”

This was unexpected and it caught Severus by surprise. The twenty four year old was displaying such maturity and open honesty that Severus felt the last of his misgivings about the relationship melt away. He trusted Bill with her, trusted him not to use her or hurt her. He trusted Bill to protect her.

“I give my permission. But I don’t want to know any of the details,” Severus confessed, watching the smile that spread across Bill’s face. “Her control, what did you do?”

“To be quite honest, I don’t actually know. We have this connection, I can hear her thoughts in my head. We have these conversations through it. When she arrived here today I felt it, her pain and fragility. We’ve kept it closed for the entire four years she’s been away, but today she couldn’t seem to keep it closed. I’m not quite sure how it happened but she seemed to use my mind to strengthen hers. It’s never happened to us before, but I’m glad it did.”

Severus relaxed after that, and, by the time they returned to the kitchen, they were laughing and joking about some of the pranks Solarin had talked Bill and Tonks into when they were at school. The three of them had given the Marauders and Fred and George a run for their money. They were all amateurs compared to the Odd Trio. The three of them had gone down in Hogwarts history for even managing to prank Dumbledore once. None of them had ever reached the point of expulsion, thankfully, and they had all been Prefects, Bill even ending up as Head Boy.

Solarin looked at them numbly and decided that she never would understand her brother as well as she thought she did.

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Solarin looked at the pale nervous boy seated opposite her in the dim living room, their knees an inch apart. He looked like he wanted to throw up, or maybe run.

“We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to, Draco,” Solarin promised, her voice gentle. “If you’ve changed your mind then we can just leave it.”

They were alone in the room, but she could sense several minds just outside the door. Severus and Bill were a given, neither of them quite sure what would happen once she entered Draco’s mind fully. No silencing spells had been used and she knew that they were listening at the door. Harry’s mind was present too, and Solarin suspected that Harry had reached his limit with Severus’ absence. Albus and Mad-Eye had left for home just after dinner, so she didn’t have to deal with them hovering as well. She could feel Tonks’ mind in the kitchen, along with Molly, Arthur, Charlie, Sirius and Remus. 

The lights were turned down low, the dimness making it easier for her to do this. Draco looked almost golden in the soft light.

“No, I want you to do this,” Draco said, his voice steadier than he looked.

“Draco, you need to understand that there are no guarantees that I’ll be able to find anything. And even if I do it doesn’t mean that we’ll have any answers as to what’s happening to you. I need you to understand that before you agree to this,” Solarin specified.

“I understand. But it’s worth it, isn’t it? It’s worth knowing what you might find,” Draco reasoned.

“Yes, I believe it’s worth it. It’s worth a try.”

“Then I say we go ahead with it.”

“I have to tell you that for me to be able to do this properly I need to touch you. And the process is very invasive. My mind will be fully integrated with yours for a short time. I cannot guarantee you that I will not see something you may feel is very personal.”

“I understand that you’ll be getting really deep in my head, and I accept that.” He hesitated and Solarin could see his reluctance. “What kind of touch?”

“Your hands. I’ll need to hold your hands to do this. If you’re at all uncomfortable with this, with any of it, you need to tell me now. Once we start, I won’t be able to stop at a moments notice. It will take me time to pull back from your mind. This isn’t like when I glance in to a mind. I do that every day, this is more intense, I’ll be able to see everything in your head, you will have no defences against me.”

Draco looked pensive and she watched as his brow furrowed in concentration. She noticed that he had missed a spot of yellow paint on his right ear. She kept her mind completely separate from his, keeping herself centred. 

“I want to do this. I understand everything you’ve explained. I’m sure I want this,” Draco said determinedly.

“All right. Are you comfortable with Bill, Severus and Harry being present while we do this? If not they can wait outside like they’re doing already.”

“No, I’m okay with it.”

She sent the silent command through her link with Bill and the three of them entered. “I need the three of you to stay on the edges of the room. Don’t get close to me and Draco unless it appears that something is wrong. Bill, I’m going to half open the connection, so you’ll be the one to know if something’s gone wrong. Are you all clear on that?” she said, her voice leaving no room for argument. They all nodded and took their positions. She looked at Draco.

“All right, are you ready?”

The blonde nodded.

“Ok. Draco, I want you to close your eyes. Focus on the sound of my voice and breathe deep, slow and steady. Listen to your breathing, listen to the gentle swell and flow of it, like the tide. Let it relax you. Let your body go limp, all the tensions seeping out.” She was careful to keep her voice low and even. She could see Draco relaxing and she dropped her barriers half way, letting Bill in, letting her mind stroke Draco’s. “Draco, I want you to imagine yourself standing in the middle of the Great Hall at Hogwarts. All the tables and chairs are missing, there are no candles overhead, it is simply you in the empty Great Hall. You feel calm, you’re safe here. This is a safe place, nothing can harm you here. Look up, see the enchanted ceiling is a bright clear blue. Look out of the windows, see the nice weather. Nothing bad can happen here, this is your space.”

She could feel Harry’s intense gaze on the two of them, her brother-in-law obviously entranced by the whole unique procedure. Harry had told her that he had never heard of a being like her, of someone that could do something like this. She could feel Bill’s mind, lightly against her own. Draco was slightly slumped in his chair, a look of peace on his face. She knew Severus was watching them but she kept her eyes fixed on Draco.

“Draco, I want you to look down at your own body, I want you to imagine that it is a second skin, like a set of clothes. You can simply step out of it and leave it standing there. Can you imagine it?” she asked. If Draco couldn’t do this part then she would have to start again from scratch.

“Yes,” came Draco’s mumbled reply.

“Good. That’s very good, you’re doing so well. Draco, I want you to step out of your body. Walk around it, see yourself from all angles as you walk. Can you see it?”

“Yes. Feels weird, like I’m floating.”

“That’s good, Draco. It’s good that you feel like that, that’s exactly how you’re supposed to feel right now. I want you to remember that I will let nothing happen to you, that I will let you come to no harm. You are completely safe.” She danced her fingers over the back of his hand. “Draco, can you feel me touching your hand?”

“No. Am I supposed to?”

“No, you’re not. You’re the model patient. I’m going to come and visit you now, Draco, come visit you in your Great Hall. Will you show me around?”

“Yes.”

She slipped her hands into his larger limp ones and closed her eyes. She let her breathing slow, let it match Draco’s. 

She was standing in her own Great Hall, looking around at her own mind. She could see the clouds of moving images, her memories. Books lay scattered around her feet, her knowledge. Butterflies fluttered around her head, her thoughts. Bright strips of wispy glowing colour were swirling around her legs and arms, some brighter than others, her emotions. There was a silky curtain all around the edge of the room, her own control. It was fluttering slightly, and she could see Bill through the thin fabric. She let herself walk forwards, let herself be carried to the doors. They were opened and she stepped through into another Great Hall.

This was Draco’s mind, and she couldn’t help but feel that she had seen one like it before, though she couldn’t pinpoint where. Draco’s mind was nothing like her own. There was barely enough space for her to take two steps forwards. There was a thick solid wall directly in front of her. Swirling around her feet were barely half a dozen strips of colour, her mind had contained more than fifty.

The small space was crammed with books, Draco’s knowledge bared for her to see. But his memories were hidden behind the wall, as were his thoughts. Two or three wounded butterflies of thought fluttered through the wall, there should have been hundreds of them, and they should have been healthier looking than that. Where was Draco, why couldn’t she see him?

He must have been somewhere behind the wall. She could hear Bill calling to her, though she couldn’t hear him properly. She could feel his worry. 

[I’m all right.] she pressed into his mind before she approached the wall. She ran her hand along it, feeling the echo of magic long since cast. The wall had been there a long time, more than a decade. She could hear the buzzing again, identical to when she had last visited his mind. It was so loud. The magic on the wall tasted familiar to her, she knew the magical signature attached to it, but she couldn’t place it. 

She could hear Draco calling out to her, he was beginning to panic. The wall was in her way. She pushed against it, but it stood fast. She stood back and let her magic pool in her, let it swirl down to rest in her hands, let it build. She raised her hands and blasted at it, rubble flying at her. She hurried to the hole, looking through the dust. She managed to get a glimpse of a perfectly normal mind behind it, identical almost to her own, and a flash of blonde hair before something hit her, hard.

It hit her in the stomach, winding her. She straightened, looking at the wall. The hole was gone. This was not good. Bill was calling out to her in panic now, and Draco was panicking too. She could feel his physical hands trying to pull away from hers and she let her physical grip tighten. Harry and Severus’ panic was hitting her too, something was wrong, very very wrong, and they knew it. Something was trying to pull them apart.

She found herself hit again, apparently by the wall, and it sent her flying backwards, through the doorway into her own mind.

And then she was in her physical body, and she felt like the real Great Hall had landed on her.

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Something was wrong, Bill could feel it. The faint whisper of Draco’s mind felt odd to him. He suddenly didn’t want her to go into it.

He let his own uncertainty feed into her brain. [Solarin, are you all right?] he pressed with it.

[I’m all right.] she replied before she stepped through.

Bill could feel her confusion and saw it spread across her physical face. He felt his hands tingle. That hadn’t happened that one time she had done this to Tonks when they were younger. There was an odd metallic taste in his mouth. He could feel Draco’s panic through her.

He could feel power pooling in her, settling in her hands, his own suddenly feeling white hot.

“Severus, something’s not right. It doesn’t feel right, we need to pull her out of there,” he said, watching Draco’s face begin to show alarm, the blonde trying to pull his hands back.

“We need to disconnect them. She needs to get out,” Severus said, moving towards them. Harry stayed where he was, Severus fixing him with a quick meaningful look. Solarin was red in the face, and covered in a cold sweat. Oh God, something had just hit her in the stomach, Bill felt the blow in his own body, sudden and hard. She began to gasp for air. He grabbed her arms, Severus grabbing Draco’s, the two of them tugging, but Solarin’s grip tightened.

Draco was beginning to whimper, and his eyes snapped open a split second before something blasted Solarin across the room, straight into the bookcase. 

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“Fuck!” Solarin screamed, her hands coming up to press at her temples, pulling at her hair. Books and splintered shelves were scattered around and under her. The chair she had been sitting in was now no more than a pile of smouldering ash. 

Harry watched in horror as the augur writhed in pain, screaming obscenities at random intervals. She appeared to be under the Cruciatus curse. It looked like blue electricity was dancing over her skin and even Bill refrained from touching her. Objects around the room were shaking and exploding and Harry moved to stand behind the sofa as the light fixture crashed to the floor a scant few feet from where he was standing. Paper peeled from the walls, incinerating before it hit the carpet, which was unravelling itself. The walls were cracking, the glass in the windows was curving ominously, threatening to explode. After a few moments it quietened.

Things stopped shaking, stopped exploding and Solarin’s eyes opened, now a glowing blood red. She blinked a few times and they were back to their usual fathomless black. Bill moved to her, Severus still checking that Draco was unharmed.

“Pain potion now,” she ground out from Bill’s arms and Harry took that as his chance to help. He hurried from the room, well, as fast as an eight month pregnant magical hermaphrodite could hurry, and down to the kitchen.

“It all went wrong, she needs a pain potion. Severus and Bill look really worried,” Harry announced, surprised that his voice was shaking worse than it had in weeks. Charlie leapt to his feet and Tonks grabbed the potion, the two of them running out of the room. Harry sank down weakly into the nearest chair, realizing for the first time that he was shaking. He couldn’t remember shaking this badly since before Severus had claimed him.

“Harry? Are you all right, pup?” 

Remus was sitting down next to him, looking at him with kind eyes. He leaned into Remus’ arms, letting him be a substitute for Severus. It would hold him until Severus had seen to the mess that was Draco’s reading.

“Sirius,” Harry called weakly, gratified to find Sirius hurry to his side. He pulled him into the hug and let the two of them soothe him slightly.

“It all went wrong. Something was wrong, and Severus and Bill tried to pull her and Draco back. But they couldn’t. And then she got blasted back into the bookcase. The chair she was sitting in, it went up in flames, I’ve never seen anything burn so fast. And all the things started to shake and explode. And she was screaming. And when she opened her eyes they were glowing red,” Harry explained, feeling the baby kick wildly in agitation of his suddenly raised stress levels.

Remus and Sirius soothed him as best they could, but the days events were all starting to hit him at once. He felt sick to his stomach when he thought what could have happened if Lucius had been a minute quicker, or them a minute slower. He rubbed his bulge at the thought, suddenly finding the frantic kicking soothing. 

The unexpected confrontation of people from his past, from that part of his life when he was, dare he say it, normal, or at least when he had been able to think of himself that way. From when he could still believe that he was a normal sixteen year old boy, before he had started hiding the clear proof of his difference under his shirt. It hadn’t really bothered him at the time, when he had seen them all sitting there. Christ, he had even felt good enough to hug Molly. But now, it was hitting him hard.

The explosion that was Draco’s reading seemed to be some kind of trigger for his nervousness to all come flooding back and he felt his panic rising the way it had when he had first been saved by Severus, rise to the level where he was shaking and sweating and finding it hard to breathe. His limbs felt like jelly and his heart was pounding. He hadn’t been hit with a panic attack like this since before Severus claimed him, not this hard. He needed Severus, more than he could find the words to say, but he knew that Solarin needed him too.

“Don’t move,” Harry whispered, his tears starting to fall. Remus was saying something to Molly but he couldn’t quite make it out. His panic was making it hard to make out anything.

“It’s all right, pup. We’re not going anywhere. We know you need Severus. Will we do until he comes down?” Sirius asked, shooting Remus a worried look over his godsons head. Sirius and Severus had come to a sort of peace, though they still loved to verbally attack each other, and Sirius had come to appreciate that Harry needed Severus more than anything else when he panicked.

Molly handed Remus the potion he had asked for in a small glass and Remus helped Harry to force it down. It was the calming draught that Severus had brewed especially for Harry and the kitchen now held an entire shelf full of the pearlescent blue liquid in little crystal bottles. It was a fraction of the strength of a normal calming draught but it was enough to keep Harry slightly more relaxed until Severus was able to see to him. He was still shaking uncontrollably, but his breathing had slowed a little. He clung to Sirius and Remus, one of their sleeves clutched tightly in each of his fists.

“I have to wait. I have to share him,” Harry mumbled.

“That’s right, Harry. Severus loves you both and right now she needs his help a little more than you do,” Remus encouraged, reassured by Harry actually talking now instead of just gasping. Severus had told them that Harry talking was a good sign, even if it made no sense.

“She looks really bad. She needs more help than me right now. She gets him and I get you two. Sirius didn’t make me choose, I don’t make Severus choose.”

Harry’s logic amused Sirius slightly. He was eternally grateful that Severus had shown them how to do this, how to help their son if he couldn’t. But for the first time in his life he wished for Severus to walk into his kitchen. Harry’s panic was harder to handle than he thought it was. Severus made this look so easy.

“You’re right. That’s very good, Harry. You’re doing well, pup,” Sirius praised.

“Don’t move,” Harry repeated.

It took an hour for Severus to come into the kitchen, and Harry’s logical little statements had gone from being about Solarin, to the baby, to seeing Ron and Hermione the next day, and everything in between. When he entered the room, looking exhausted and worried, he didn’t say a single word. He just opened his arms and let Harry fall into them, hearing the muttered thank you from Sirius and Remus as they gladly relinquished the Gryffindor to the ex-Slytherin. He knew that they had done their best and he was impressed that one of them had not had to come get him. 

Harry was breathing hard, and he could feel the baby kicking wildly in protest as he held Harry to him. There was a small glass on the table and he wondered how well the potion had actually worked. He sat down and pulled his husband onto his lap, breathing deep and slow, forcing Harry to copy him. Harry pulled him in for a kiss and he couldn’t quite decide who it did more good for, Harry or himself.

They broke apart and Harry looked at him. “Is she okay?” Harry whispered, his eyes wide and worried.

“She’s sleeping, so is Draco. They seem to be well now.”

“But is she okay?”

“Bill assures me that she’s fine. It really looked worse than it was, love.” Severus stroked his hands through the unruly mane, down the slim back and round the sprite to hold him. “It scared me too, Harry. It scared everyone, not just you. None of us have ever seen that happen to her before. You didn’t get hurt, did you?”

“No, the light fixture missed me and I went to stand behind the sofa. It seemed the best bet,” Harry replied, feeling the tightness in his chest ease. Though there was still the soreness of his breasts.

“Thank Merlin. I was worried,” Severus breathed. He leaned in and kissed Harry again, just to be sure that he was all right and felt reassured by the feel of those soft lips moving with his own.

He leaned back in his chair and found Arthur pushing a small brandy into his hand. He gulped it down and rubbed his eyes.

“What happened?” Remus asked, Harry content to stay sitting on Severus’ lap, snuggled against his chest with Severus running calm hands along his back, playing with his hair.

“We have no idea what happened, but Bill knew as soon as she started that something was wrong. It turns out that Sol used the same technique on Tonks in their youth and Bill was aware of what was happening then as well. He said it felt completely different this time. He says that it felt like something was punching her in the stomach, though he’s not inclined to talk right now. Sol is not making any kind of sense. She’s exhausted and covered in bruises, though I think that is more from her slamming into the bookcase than anything else,” Severus replied wearily. He chuckled slightly. “The living room is going to need some work. Though, saying that, I think we got off lightly. I think that her control flared wildly, and her magic went with it. There are no ornaments left, and there are cracks in the walls. The books are still intact, though.”

“She is all right though?” Molly asked. 

“Bill assures me that she is all right. I am inclined to believe him. He has a rather spectacular bruise on his abdomen. A side effect of the connection. Solarin and Bill have gone to bed, Tonks is keeping an eye on them. Draco is asleep, he has no idea what happened either. Charlie is watching him. We’ll probably get the answers in the morning.”

Harry yawned and Severus decided that it was getting late. He bid them all a good night and led Harry upstairs, the little hermaphrodite following him obediently. Once behind closed doors he kissed Harry as deep as he could, the sprite responding immediately. It wasn’t like the kisses that had led to lovemaking between them. Harry threaded his fingers in his hair and let Severus run his hands over him possessively, almost compulsively, let him check for the slightest scratch. Harry didn’t need Severus to explain, he knew his husband was worried about his sister and frustrated at having to leave it to Bill to care for her. It wasn’t until Severus’ hands got to his breasts did Harry pull away, groaning in pain.

“Sorry, Severus. I’m just so sore,” Harry said at his husbands confused look.

“Oh god, I’m so sorry, love, I completely forgot. I got you something for it,” Severus said honestly, kissing Harry on the forehead before he moved to the dresser. His shopping bags had been shoved in here earlier and completely forgotten about. He brought them over to the bed and reached for the one with a teddy bear on the side.

Harry sat there watching the man rummage through the bag before he pulled out a short black vest.

“What is it?” Harry asked, poking at the odd garment.

“The woman in the shop called it a sports bra. She assured me that it would help with the discomfort, something about the pressure of the Lycra.” 

“A bra?” Harry said, looking scandalised.

“I know that women wear them, Harry, but there is no alternative. I know you’re not a woman, but for now we have to indulge the female side of your anatomy. It’s only for a little while, while you’re sore. When this is all over, I’ll never suggest it again.”

Harry sighed and looked at the bra. “All right,” he mumbled grouchily.

“Do you want to put it on now, see if it helps?”

“I suppose, but I’m not sure it will fit. It looks too small,” Harry said uncertainly, pulling off his t-shirt and hissing as the rough fabric moved over his torturously sensitive nipples. He had a suspicion that Severus would not be playing with them again for a while.

“That’s the point, love. It’s meant to be tight. We’ll try it and if it truly is too small then we’ll resize it to fit,” Severus reassured. Harry reached out and grabbed his icy hands and placed them on his breasts, moaning in relief.

“I couldn’t ask Molly for some ice, not for this. Right now, I love your hands more than anything else in the world. We’ll try it in a minute, just give me a minute. This is the best they’ve felt all day,” Harry explained, his face a mask of utter relief. Severus watched him, feeling his heart skip a beat every so often. The breasts under his hands were bigger than the last time he touched them. Harry had been flat chested before, but now there were tiny little mounds that just fit into Severus’ palm. No wonder Harry was so sore, they had appeared overnight.

It wasn’t often that Harry suffered with his pregnancy, but today seemed to have been bad with it right from the start. Severus had woken first, as always, and when Harry had joined him in the land of the waking he had gone to stretch in his normal way, the way he did which had Severus smiling in anticipation. Harry always stretched and then brought him in for a kiss. But the stretch that morning had Harry whimpering in pain. Harry had followed Severus’ suggestion and taken a warm shower in an attempt to ease his aching back, listening to Severus explain that he probably slept awkwardly from the sink where he was shaving. He never had gotten to finish that shower. His body had decided that it was a good day to visit morning sickness on him once more, rejecting last nights dinner. He had thought he was finally free of it. He would never eat pasta again.

Severus had helped him get dressed and it was there that his chest had decided to add to the day’s body issues. It felt like the skin was peeling off, or maybe that they were about to explode. Harry had endured Severus’ examination of them well, only bruising him slightly as he pressed them. Harry hadn’t really cared that it was necessary, that Severus was being as gentle as possible, just that Severus was quick about it. It hadn’t made him feel any better when Severus had said that he would be able to breast-feed. The knowledge didn’t seem all that much of a compensation for excruciating boobs.

“Okay, your hands are getting warm now. Let’s do this before the cold wears off and I end up screaming at you,” Harry announced and Severus helped him wriggle into the tight band of material.

To Harry’s surprise, it did fit without resizing and it felt amazing. 

“Have I told you lately that I love you?” Harry asked, half moaning as Severus smoothed the fabric down along his ribs.

“You told me this morning, just before I left for Diagon Alley,” Severus answered as his smoothing changed into simply feeling Harry beneath his fingers. The events of the day had put him on his guard and he was only now beginning to relax, only now that he was alone with Harry in their own little world. 

“Well, let me tell you again, I love you,” Harry said, Severus leaning in to kiss him gently. “But I’m so not wearing a bra any longer than I have to.” Severus chuckled.

Harry stripped down to his boxers, leaving the bra on, and Severus did the same before Severus caught his attention once more.

Harry’s smile seemed to light up the whole room as Severus pulled out a tiny set of Hogwarts school robes. Severus felt all his tensions melt away as Harry gushed over it, as he finally got the smile he wanted. He watched as his lover played with the miniature clip-on tie and ran his fingers over the tiny little Hogwarts crest.

“Where did you get this?” Harry asked.

“Do you like it?” Severus asked, dodging Harry’s question. He wasn’t sure how Harry would take it if he found out that it was a gift from Fred and George. Harry didn’t seem to be in the mood to discuss any other people from his past at that particular moment.

“I love it. It’s beautiful. Just think of him in it. He’ll look so handsome.”

“Well, with you for a parent, what else could he be but absolutely gorgeous,” Severus replied and Harry blushed. 

Harry looked at him seriously. “This is killing you, isn’t it? This whole thing of you letting Bill take care of Solarin,” Harry asked, looking at Severus suspiciously though he continued to play with the little outfit, finding that the teeny shirt was made of the softest cotton, that there were little poppers instead of buttons, that the tiny trousers had an elastic waist instead of a button and zipper. 

“I feel a little redundant. And I don’t like the thought of my sister doing…that.” Severus shuddered and Harry just managed to hold in his laughter. “But I accept that she is 23, she was going to date sooner or later.”

“Though, you’d rather it was later.”

“How did you get to know me so well?” Severus grumbled, lying back against the pillows.

Harry crawled up the bed, the little uniform still clutched in his hand. He settled himself on Severus’ lap, straddling him, Severus running his hands along his sides even though he was annoyed that Harry could see through him so easily. He leaned in and kissed Severus, the mans annoyance disappearing a little more with every move of his lips. “Because you let me see you, all of you. Well, maybe not all of you, I understand that there are things you won’t talk about and I get it, they’re just too hard to talk about. But I see you. I know you. I’m the only one you let do that. That’s how I’m the only one who knows you like this,” Harry explained, leaning back. It was his favourite way to sit and talk to Severus, straddling him. It reminded him of how gentle the man had been when he first claimed him, when he first showed him how good he could feel.

Severus softened, letting his fingers play with the tight band of the bra against Harry’s ribs. “All right, I admit it, if it were up to me, she wouldn’t date until she hits triple figures and then she’ll be too old to do it.” Harry giggled at him. “But Bill is a good man. In all their time at Hogwarts I can’t remember the two of them ever having a big argument. They had their little spats, and their days when all they did was bicker, but never anything major. He never left her to the mercy of any bully, even if she could defend herself better than he ever could. He never hurt her or let her get hurt, not if he could put a stop to it. I have no reason to believe that he would act any differently now. I trust him with her, though that is another thing that stays just between us, love.”

Harry nodded at the glancing mention of all his secrets that he had confided to Severus. This would be another thing that stayed in their little world.

Harry held the little costume up to his bump, laughing at the way it covered it and then some. “Do you think it’ll fit him when he’s born, or will he have to grow into it?” Harry asked.

“I shouldn’t think that it would be that outsized on him. Keep in mind that you do still have another month to go, love. He’s still got time to grow.”

“Did you see his room?” Harry asked excitedly. He was proud of it and felt that it was perfect for their son. It looked complete with the crib and everything else in there.

“I did. I like it, the yellow is a very nice colour. Molly didn’t let you loose with a paintbrush, did she?” Severus asked, smiling at Harry’s animated expression, the sprite bouncing slightly in his enthusiasm, the uniform still held to his belly.

“No. She wouldn’t let me. She made me stay in a chair and give orders on who had missed bits. But I did get to watch Charlie and Draco have a paint fight. That was fun, watching Draco get all messy. He looked horrified.” Harry contemplated his bump, dropping the costume and bringing Severus’ hands to feel their son kick the last of his faint sleepy kicks before he settled down to sleep for the night. 

“Do you still want to see your friends tomorrow? I know it scared you to see that happen to Solarin. If you don’t want to we can change the day,” Severus asked, playing with Harry’s hair with his free hand.

“I still want to see them tomorrow. I’m kind of looking forward to it. I’m nervous but I want to see them. I miss spending time with them.” Harry paused. “Are you sure Solarin’s all right?” he asked, looking into dark eyes with green ones that took Severus’ breath away.

“Positive. She’s going to be bruised and sore for a few days, but she’s fine. I don’t know what happened but she’ll tell us in the morning. She’s fine, love,” Severus reassured, cupping Harry’s face and running his thumb over a cheekbone.

Harry nodded, looking down at his bump again, admiring the way Severus’ hand looked on it. “How big do you think Hermione is?” Harry asked.

“According to Molly, Hermione is bigger than you in the bump department.”

“But…Hermione is two months behind me,” Harry said in disbelief. He hadn’t really believed Severus when he had told him he was small.

“I told you that your bump was small.”

“But…do you think he’s okay in there?” Harry asked, looking at his stomach, stroking it. “What if he’s too small?”

Severus found the concern so sweet he almost sighed pathetically. Almost. “Harry, you are very petite. It makes sense that your baby would be small also. All the spells we have done show that he’s very healthy. You’ve got to remember that you were starved, Harry. He’s bound to be a very little boy. He’s perfectly healthy, I promise.”

“But my magic interfered with the spells. Are you sure you’re sure?”

Severus chuckled slightly. “That just stopped us from seeing him. The spells to check his health were perfectly normal. He’s just a little small.”

“All right, I’ll stop worrying then. Well, I’ll try,” Harry said calmly, placing the uniform in the bag once more and dropping the bags to the floor, Severus holding his hips so he didn’t fall. Harry looked at him, those green eyes taking Severus’ breath away again. “How are your lessons with Madame Pomfrey going?”

Severus grinned. “She threatened to hex me if I don’t listen to her when she tells me that I am absolutely ready to do this.”

Harry laughed as he stood and stretched, this time with no pain. “Then I think you’re ready. I filled in that plan sheet you wanted me to do, the one for the labour and birth. It’s in one of the boxes.”

“I’ll find it in the morning. We’ll go through it together in a few weeks, nearer the time. That way you’ll be absolutely ready when the labour starts and you’ll know what to expect.” Severus yawned and slipped into the covers, making himself comfortable. “I got you a book as well, love. It’s a guide for new parents. Should tell you everything you ever wanted to know,” Severus said as Harry lay down, snuggling into his embrace, the two of them adopting their usual position of Harry’s back to Severus’ chest, Severus’ arms wrapped around him. Though, admittedly, Harry had begun to need a pillow under his bump so he didn’t topple over.

“Severus?” Harry whispered into the dark a while later.

“Mmmmmm?” Severus hummed.

“Can we use my dads name as a middle name?”

“Which father are you referring to? You do have three of them.”

“My biological dad, James. Can we use his name as a middle name for the baby?”

“If you like,” Severus replied instantly.

“But I thought you and my dad never got along,” Harry asked confusedly, choosing his words carefully.

“We didn’t. But, Harry, he’s your father, which makes him my father-in-law. He’s family to me now, and he’s a part of what made you who you are. I can’t hate him now, not anymore. Without James Potter, there would be no you. If you want James, even for a first name, I’m absolutely on board. Just promise me something.”

Harry had a warm sensation settling in his heart. “Promise you what?” he asked.

“Tobias is never even considered for the baby.”

“But it’s your middle name. I don’t understand.”

“Tobias was my father. I was given his name as my middle name and Solarin has Eileen as hers, after our mother,” Severus said simply, his voice seemingly calm, but Harry could hear the undertone of pain. Harry rolled over and encased Severus in a warm comforting hug. Severus never talked of his parents and Harry didn’t ask. It was one of those things he would leave be unless Severus needed to offload, just the same way Severus never pushed him into talking about things he didn’t want to share.

“Tobias never even gets considered for the baby, I promise,” Harry said firmly into the mans neck. Severus cupped his arse and they gave up conversation at that point for an entirely more satisfying activity.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

The morning of the visit was a calm one for the most part. Or at least it started off that way.

Molly had arrived early that morning and had breakfast laid out ready for them all when Remus ambled down the stairs at seven, proclaiming Sirius to still be asleep. Severus and Harry had joined him at twenty past and Charlie and Draco had wandered down around eightish, Draco looking cheerful and well rested, a big smile plastered on his face. Severus commented that whatever happened last night didn’t seem to have done Draco any harm. Draco replied with a small explanation of it feeling like a weird dream he had. They were all chatting amicably about the upcoming events of the day when Solarin and Bill wandered in at half past eight.

Bill followed Solarin to the table, the witch sitting down delicately. Bill looked a little sore as well. Harry noticed that even through her obvious pain she had still managed to dress in a tight pair of jeans and a skin-tight black lace camisole. He could see dark vicious bruises along her shoulders, before her long dark hair covered the rest of her back. He noticed an odd sort of burn, kind of like a tattoo, on her left shoulder. It was a ring of runes surrounding a length of rope, coiled like a snake ready to strike. Harry thought it looked creepy. He wondered what it was for, why she had allowed something that looked so painful to be done, why it had been that symbol that was chosen. Severus seemed to be determined to ignore the bites on her throat. Harry took it as a sign that she was comfortable in present company that she had chosen such an outfit and not her attempt to annoy her brother further, though he couldn’t be sure of that.

“I’ve looked worse,” Solarin reassured Harry, noticing his worried stares, smiling gently.

“Are you okay?” Harry asked. She was a little battered looking but she appeared alert and cheerful.

“I’m fine. It’s just a few bruises and a slight ringing in my ears,” Solarin said as Tonks bounced in. She had spent the night on a camp bed in Solarin’s room, Bill taking the bed with the augur. The three of them had figured that physical closeness between the brunette and the redhead would probably help Solarin stay stable after such trauma. They hadn’t seen the need to push Solarin’s control anymore than it already had been. To them it had felt like the time they had camped out on the Hogwarts grounds, though Bill and Solarin had not slept cuddled up that night.

“Good morning all,” Tonks said brightly, plopping down beside Bill.

“Morning, Tonks,” Molly said, brightly. “Tea?”

“I’ll take a pumpkin juice, thanks,” Tonks said as she helped herself to some blueberry pancakes from the huge stack in the middle of the table.

“Solarin?” Draco asked. He looked paler than usual but Harry put that down to the shocks of last night. Overall he looked unharmed and Harry figured that Solarin had somehow protected him during the explosions.

“Yes, sweetie?” she replied, accepting a croissant from Severus. Severus was pleased to see that Molly had taken their little chat to heart. He had taken the Weasley matriarch aside before dinner the previous night and mentioned to her that Harry wasn’t able to eat such large portions. His lovers breakfast of scrambled eggs with a hot buttered roll looked more a size that he was used to. Severus also noticed that Molly had listened to him when he had told her no toast.

“Well, I was wondering if you managed to get anything from my head last night,” Draco said a little uncertainly.

“Yes, we’re all wondering what happened,” Severus added.

“To be honest, I’m not sure I could tell you what happened. I’m not sure myself,” she admitted. “Well, it started out normal enough. I went in to my head to begin with, and it was fine, just the way it always had been. But when I stepped into Draco’s head it was bizarre.”

She took a sip of coffee before she continued.

“Severus, do you remember me telling you that Draco’s white noise was loud?”

“Yes. You said you had never encountered something like it.”

“Never, but I have seen a mind like Draco’s before. When I got into his head there was this great big wall in front of me. I couldn’t even go two steps forwards. The buzzing was coming from the wall, not Draco’s barriers. It is not his white noise.” She noticed the confused look on Harry’s face. “Harry, the way I described it to Draco last night is exactly how I see it. I see an empty Great Hall. I can walk through it, looking at what I want.” Harry nodded and she looked at Severus. “I have seen a mind like it before, once, but I couldn’t tell you who’s mind that was.”

“So, this is not a normal occurrence?” Severus asked.

“No, definitely not. The wall didn’t seem to be harming Draco, it was more just there. Well, that is until I tried to get through it. I blasted a hole through it. It didn’t seem to like that.”

She turned gingerly to Draco, looking him straight in the eye. “I managed to get a look behind the wall before it threw me back. I saw your mind, Draco. It’s perfectly normal behind the wall.”

“But the wall isn’t supposed to be there?” Draco asked uncertainly.

“No, but it doesn’t seem to be doing you any harm, just me.” Draco nodded and gave a shaky sort of smile and Solarin turned to Severus once more. “The wall is out of the ordinary.”

“Did you manage to learn anything of it before you were thrown out?”

“Well, the wall is old. It’s been there more than a decade and I’d be willing to bet that it’s been there for most, if not all, of his life. The thing that is most interesting is the walls magical signature. It isn’t Draco’s.”

“Not mine?” Draco asked.

“No. Whatever the wall is, it was put there by someone else. I recognised the signature on it but I can’t place where I’ve tasted it before.”

“Tasted?” Harry asked.

“To me, each and every magical signature has it’s own unique taste. I can tell you who cast any spell simply by the taste I get in my mouth.”

“So, what did the wall taste like?” Harry asked, nibbling at his roll.

“Metallic, like when you put a penny in your mouth. Coppery. It is so odd, I know I’ve tasted it before, I just can’t tell you who it is. It’s right there on the tip of my tongue. It’ll come to me eventually,” Solarin reassured.

“So, whatever is wrong with me was probably done by someone else?” Draco asked.

“Definitely done by someone else. The signature wasn’t yours.”

“What would you surmise about the whole experience?” Severus asked.

“The wall is old, wasn’t put there by Draco and doesn’t like me. Apart from that, all I can tell you is that his mind is perfectly normal behind it and it isn’t doing him any harm,” Solarin supplied. “If I had to guess, I’d say that the symptoms Draco has described are indicators of something bigger. I don’t think that the symptoms are the problem themselves, I think that they’re symptoms of something else.”

“Why can’t I remember it properly?” Draco asked.

“Always happens. Ask Tonks, the people I integrate with can never remember the experience fully, it appears to them as a sort of dream they had. I think it’s because no one can actually do what I do, so their minds reject the experience as out of the ordinary and pass it off as the work of imagination,” Solarin said, Tonks nodding reassuringly with a smile. Draco seemed to accept this easily enough and ploughed on with his next question.

“Can you make the symptoms go away?”

“Not yet, but we’re getting closer. It’s only a matter of time before we figure this out. Try not to worry about it. You’re family, we won’t let any harm come to you if we can help it,” Solarin said and Draco blushed faintly. “What time do your friends get here, Harry?”

“I don’t know. Remus?” Harry said, looking at the werewolf.

“Albus called just before you all came down and said that they’d be here about eleven. He said that they can stay until a few hours after dinner but then they have to go back, or they might be missed. He doesn’t want anyone asking questions about where they’ve disappeared to,” Remus supplied. “If people start asking, they might look into what properties we all own in an attempt to find you. The last thing we need is the press getting wind of your new living arrangements. Even if they cannot find this house, they can still send owls.”

“Oh,” Harry said. He was about to ask Solarin about her abilities in more detail but the floo sprang to life and Moody came thundering out, looking furious. He had Kingsley Shacklebolt in a death grip, his hand around the black Aurors arm in a crushing clasp.

“Tell him,” Mad-Eye snarled at Kingsley, pushing him roughly towards the table though he kept his grip on the arm. “You tell Severus what you did.”

All eyes fixed on the Auror and Harry wondered how long Moody could apply pressure to the arm before it snapped. No one noticed Solarin get up from her seat and walk over to Mad-Eye, until she shoved him away from Kingsley, though her mentor kept his grip on the arm.

“Stop it, you’re hurting him!” she demanded angrily.

“Why the fuck are you defending him?” Mad-Eye asked her incredulously. From the look on Severus’ face, Harry soon realized that this argument between them was out of the ordinary.

“Because he doesn’t deserve to have his arm crushed by you.”

“No, he deserves death after what he did.”

“Stay out of it, Mad-Eye,” Solarin warned as Moody finally released Kingsley.

“Do you want to tell Severus what Kingsley did? Do you want to tell him what you conveniently forgot to tell us yesterday?” Moody asked her and her face fell. She looked at Kingsley angrily.

“Why the fuck can’t you keep your mouth closed? I kept you out of it, why couldn’t you just shut your mouth?” she yelled at him and Harry was shocked to see him recoil in fear, shaking his head. Harry got the impression that Kingsley hadn’t told Moody anything.

“Solarin Eileen Snape, what is he talking about?” Severus asked, his voice deathly calm. Solarin took one look at him and realized that he wouldn’t accept a lie, that if he needed to, he would find some truth serum and force it out of her. She always knew as soon as he used her full name that she was in trouble.

She took a deep breath and looked at the wood of the table as she spoke, wishing, not for the first time, that she could lie. Even if she somehow managed to fool Severus, which was highly unlikely, she would never fool Bill, who looked almost as simmering angry as her brother. “The Augur Law states that any testing done on me by the Ministry must be done with an Auror as a witness. Kingsley was the one who watched them try and break me,” she admitted quietly.

The result was instantaneous. Severus was out of his seat and throttling Kingsley before anyone could stop him. Solarin was screaming at him to stop and Bill was right there with Severus, punching Kingsley while Severus’ hands tightened around his throat. They both looked angrier than Harry had ever seen someone. Their wands lay forgotten on the table. Harry sat there watching, listening to Molly and Remus yell at Bill and Severus to stop. He felt his own anger burn inside him, but stayed sitting. He was far to easy to lift off his feet. Tonks was being held back by Sirius, the young witch trying to get at Kingsley as well. Harry hadn’t even seen Sirius come in. Charlie and Draco seemed to be stunned by the whole situation. 

Suddenly, Severus, Bill and Tonks were on the floor, on their knees. Bill was holding his ears in pain, Severus and Tonks were bleeding from the nose. Solarin was standing there, angrier than Harry would have believed she could ever get. There was no white left in her eyes, the whole of the orbs were pitch black and there was a glowing red swirling in them. Harry found he was thankful that he had stayed in his seat.

It ended and Solarin helped them all up, one at a time, sending Kingsley to stand by the fireplace for his own protection. The two wizards and witch returned to their seats when it dawned on them that they would not be able to kill Kingsley today. Moody stood by the cooker, his face dark as he watched the scene.

“Why did you stop us, Arin?” Bill yelled angrily, looking daggers at Kingsley. “He was there, he watched it happen. You used to tell me that you were just having them try and figure out how you worked, you never told me that they were trying to break you. And he stood there, letting them do that to you.”

“He doesn’t deserve to die for it,” Solarin replied easily.

“Yes, he does,” Severus snarled.

Solarin sighed and turned to Kingsley. “Go home. Go now,” she ordered and he did as he was told, casting guilty looks at all the residents of the kitchen before he whipped out of sight. Solarin turned to the room.

“You know what, I never thought I’d be forced to use my abilities on any of you. No matter what he’s done, those reactions were completely out of line,” Solarin said angrily, looking at Bill, Severus and Tonks in turn. “All of you know how I feel about physical violence. I may have caused a few nose bleeds and rendered a few people unconscious but I have never sunk to the level that you all did just there. What you just did was utterly disgusting.”

“He stood there and let you get hurt,” Severus argued, though Harry didn’t see it as a good idea at that moment. “He deserved to feel a little pain.”

“So hex him unconscious. So hit him with a headache curse. Find a better way. Severus,” she paused, looking at the rest of the room. She seemed to be strengthening her resolve. Bill was looking guilty and Harry suspected that he was being scolded silently through the connection Severus had told him that they had. Tonks looked shocked at her own actions.

Solarin sat down next to her brother, taking his hands in hers, forcing him to look her in the eye. “Severus, watching you try and kill Kingsley took me right back to being three years old and watching our parents.”

Severus looked devastated and Harry wanted to comfort him, but he knew that this was not his moment, it was hers. Solarin let Severus draw her into the safety of his hold, let him soothe himself.

They pulled back and Solarin turned to Moody. “Was that really necessary?”

“Yes,” the grizzled wizard replied immediately. “You should have told us.”

“I think that we all just witnessed why I didn’t. How the hell did you find out about Kingsley anyway?”

“I went to the Ministry and pulled your records,” Moody stated simply.

“Those records are sealed. No one is supposed to be able to look at them,” Solarin rationalised.

“I’m a senior level Auror, I have clearance.”

Solarin sighed and Harry thought she might kill Moody right there and then. But, to his surprise, she looked at him sadly.

“Why would you do that? I told you everything yesterday,” Solarin asked.

“No, you didn’t. You were really short on the details, girly. Would you like to tell the truth or would you like me to do it? And don’t even think about lying to us, I already know the details, I will lay it all out,” Moody warned.

“You’re a son of a bitch, do you know that?” Solarin asked angrily.

“That may be true but it’s not the issue here. You tell them or I will. Severus and Bill deserve to know the truth.”

Solarin sighed and looked at Severus and then Bill.

“Fine,” she grumbled. She got to her feet and moved to lean against the sink, crossing her arms. She looked miserable as she took a deep breath and began to speak, her eyes fixed on the floor. Every eye in the room was on her, hanging on her every word, and she seemed to speak to no one in particular. “When I got out of Hogwarts me and Bill got this little flat over Flourish and Blotts. He was in his second year of training with Gringotts. It was a real rat hole but it was ours. Severus told me about the Augur Law, told me that registering myself would offer better protection than anything else. I believed him, so I went.” She looked at Harry briefly before she looked back down at the floor. “I saw you looking at my Brand, Harry,” she said, briefly touching the mark on her shoulder. “The Ministry branded me with it, a symbol of what I am. Even the most low down of Ministry workers will know what it means. And to answer your question, yes, it hurt. But I accepted it, it was part of keeping myself safe.” She sighed and glanced at Moody. The grizzled wizard nodded at her to continue and her eyes slid to the floor once more.

“It started small. They were testing me, seeing what I could do. They’d bring in wizards to see how well I could get inside their heads. They started with Purebloods. Then they moved to half-bloods and finally to muggle borns. They tried every permutation in between and they seemed impressed that I didn’t have a problem with any of them. Then the real trouble began. They gave me a potion. I can’t tell you what it was or what was in it, except that it smelled like a sewer. They said it would make it easier for them to test me, make it easier for them to prepare me for the life I would have to lead as an augur out in the world. I took it like a good girl. They brought in a Ministry worker. He was low level, insignificant. They had used the Imperious curse on him. His mind was laid bare. The potion stripped away my control for a while, made me defenceless against his open mind. They made him relive all of his worst memories, made me watch them. When it was all over they said that it was simply another test to see how well I could handle it. They said it was preparation for if Voldemort ever came back.”

She grabbed a glass of pumpkin juice from the table and took a sip before she continued and Harry found himself angry once more. Harry had never had a family, and now he had Solarin. She had always smiled, she had never pushed him, she had been his friend right from the word go. This was the witch who had looked at him with kind eyes when he was broken, who had been more interested in him than his injuries, who had held him as he screamed, whispering soothing nonsense in his ear. Someone had hurt her, someone had hurt his sister-in-law and he wanted them to suffer.

“A few weeks later, Severus came to visit me for Christmas. They’d gone back to the original methods of testing so my control was stronger when he arrived. Bill had gone home and I told him that my brother was overprotective, that he wouldn’t take the news of a boyfriend well. Severus stayed until just after New Year, and a few days later Bill came back. We moved into one of the apartments above Gringotts so he could continue his training. I didn’t mind, it was nicer than the one we were in before. Every morning Bill would go off to his training and I would go off to the Ministry. They told me that repeating the process with the potion was necessary, that it would prepare me. They gave me it every morning when I arrived and then they would bring on a new mind for me to experience. There was one, a muggle. Tiny little thing he was, couldn’t have been more than sixteen. They used Crucio on him until his body gave out. He lasted for hours, and every time they used the spell I screamed with him. At the end of every day, they sent me home and I said nothing. I went home and puked and cried for hours. Bill was working on some catacombs they had unearthed under the Thames, he didn’t come home until late. I was always smiling when he came home, he never suspected a thing, and if he did I just said that I was tired, that the testing took a lot out of me. He let it lie.”

She took a deep shuddering breath.

“It wasn’t until just after my eighteenth that I realized I was in trouble. I was making things explode with every surge of emotion I felt, mine or someone else’s. I was unable to block out any thought, emotion or memory, however small. It finally came to a head one day in May. I was in the Ministry and they brought in a child. She was so small. She was muggle. She had these big dark eyes and long dark hair. She couldn’t have been more than five. They didn’t even need to use the potion anymore, months of them using it had destroyed my ability to stop myself. They started saying things to me, about the girl, about how her family had died. She kept asking for her brother. They said that her father killed her mother and I snapped.” She wiped away a few tears that had slipped out of her glassy eyes. “I killed her,” she whispered.

She wiped away her tears and sniffed. Harry wanted to kill someone and, by the looks of the others in the room, he wasn’t the only one. Molly had a plate gripped in her hands, the porcelain threatening to break under the pressure. Remus had a crushed bagel in his hands and Tonks’ hair had turned an angry shade of red. Draco and Charlie looked like they were about to snap the table in half, they were gripping it so hard. Severus looked like he was about to throw up, and Bill looked murderous. Moody stood stock still by the cooker, his staff grasped tightly in his hands. He looked saddened more than angry and Harry reminded himself that Moody had already read the details in her file. Sirius’ was the most intriguing reaction. 

Harry knew that the augur and the Animagus had been in a shaky kind of acquaintance ever since she had lost her temper with him and he hadn’t thought Sirius cared that much about her except to tolerate the fact that she was now living in his house. But Sirius looked half mad with anger. The glass he had been holding had shattered under his sheer force of grip and the shards were cutting into his hand, but he didn’t notice. His blazing eyes were fixed on her.

“I had Bill help me leave that evening. By the next day I had left the Wizarding World and was set up in a little flat a few streets away from the Leaky Cauldron. I sent Severus a letter telling him that I was sick of the Ministry and I wasn’t ever coming back. I told Bill that the Ministry had accidentally caused some damage and he let it slide. They both let me go, accepted my explanations even if they didn’t like it. The only thing I had managed to keep control of through the whole experience was the connection and I had shut it down. I didn’t want Bill to know. It upset him but I told him that it wasn’t a good idea during the testing, that there were things I didn’t want him to know about my childhood and he let it be. Until yesterday, I haven’t set foot in the Wizarding World for almost four years straight. Kingsley was the one they pulled in to be a witness. He was only a year out of training, he was naïve. He didn’t realize the damage they were doing until the end. They fooled him just like they fooled me, manipulated us both. I told him to keep his mouth shut and I wouldn’t drop him in it. Don’t blame Kingsley for this, it wasn’t his fault. It was no ones fault,” she finished. The whole kitchen went up in an uproar, all of them yelling and screaming about the Ministry being the lowest form of life and what they wanted to do with them. Solarin and Moody were the only ones who remained silent, letting them all have their moment.

It took a full twenty minutes for anyone to calm down enough to speak rationally.

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?” Bill asked. There was hurt in his voice.

“I didn’t want you to end up in Azkaban for murder. And I didn’t want to admit that I had let myself be used like that. Though, I couldn’t tell you what they were trying to accomplish,” Solarin replied, kissing him gently and letting him pull her into his lap, his arms firmly around her waist.

She looked at Severus as Molly began to heal Sirius’ hand for him. “Sevus, say something,” Solarin urged.

“I won’t kill anyone if you make me a promise,” Severus said after a minute of looking into eyes that matched his own. His voice was calm and he looked accepting of her deception of him but Harry wasn’t fooled. Harry knew his husband was feeling guilty but had a suspicion that the guilt would be something that would never go away.

“What promise?” Solarin asked.

“Promise me that you will never ever hide something like that from me again. If someone hurts you, you will tell someone. Don’t ever hide anything like that again.”

She nodded and Severus gathered Harry into his arms, soothing himself with his comforting weight on his lap. Harry couldn’t honestly say that he blamed Solarin for hiding it, or for getting fooled the way she had. He wasn’t angry anymore, just disgusted that someone would do something like that to someone like her.

“I can’t believe this, we can’t let them get away with this!” Sirius yelled angrily.

“They’re not getting away with anything,” Moody said. There was a smile on his face that chilled Harry to the bone. It was dangerous and vengeful.

“What did you do?” Remus asked.

“I took the file to Dumbledore. He took it to the Minister. We spent most of the night in the court room. The whole Department of Mysteries has been disbanded. All the people who ever had a hand in what happened to her have been thrown in Azkaban for attempted murder, with the exception of Kingsley. He was called in as a witness under Veritaserum. He’s been suspended indefinitely. He’ll probably end up with a desk job and under constant watch to make sure he doesn’t get used again. But aside from that, the Minister has changed the law,” Moody said calmly.

“What do you mean, changed the law?” Solarin asked.

“Apparently, all augurs are women and there is never more than one at a time in the world. Something about the immense power contained within you, it gets transferred or something. Something about you makes you unique, makes you strong enough to handle the abilities. The Department of Mysteries has been luring in augurs for as far as the records go back, they have controlled and damaged them all, just like they did to you. Solarin, you are the first to live. Every augur that has gone before you has been killed by the Department of Mysteries. They were driven crazy and their abilities turned inwards.” He took a swig from his hip flask. “It’s an old legislation, but there is a law that calls for the destruction of every augur. They were classed as highly toxic magical goods required to be disposed of for public safety. The Department of Mysteries was enforcing that. Well, when the Minister saw the law and read your file, Dumbledore didn’t need to do any convincing. He changed the law this morning, at three am.”

“What does the new law say?” Severus asked. Solarin’s eyes were wide and she looked like she was holding her breath. Harry reminded himself that she had been hiding for years.

“The New Augur Law of Cornelius Fudge states that the use of the potion used on Sol is illegal under punishment of the Dementors Kiss, though the potion doesn’t even have a proper name. It’s called Augur Opiate for now. The new law states that no one can touch her, ever. No tests can ever be performed. If anyone ever tries to do anything like that to her they can be executed without trial. Sol can kill someone in self defence and not be punished for it. Cornelius was fuming. He was horrified by what he was shown. He’s also changed her classification. She is no longer classed as highly toxic magical goods required to be disposed of for public safety. She is now classed as a highly coveted magical being with direct personal protection from the Ministry itself. The Minister has classed Solarin as the most valuable witch in the world. She’s more precious than all the gold in Gringotts.”

The room was still and silent. Solarin seemed to be having a hard time breathing. Her hand had come to rest over her Brand and she was running her fingers over the pattern. Her silent tears dripped down onto the pale skin of Bill’s arm. Without a single word, she removed Bill’s arms and stood up, walking from the room. They heard the slam of a door above them and then the house fell silent. Bill made to stand but Severus stopped him with gentle words.

“Leave her be, she just needs some time alone. It’s nothing to do with you, it’s her issues. She’s closed the connection hasn’t she?” Severus asked quietly.

“Yes. How did you know?” Bill asked in surprise and confusion.

“Because I know my sister. She just needs some time alone to figure this out for herself. She has lived most of her life needing protection from some wizard or another. She just needs time to get her head around the fact that she’s free now,” Severus reassured. Bill nodded and relaxed back into his chair, looking cold and lonely. 

“Why did you do all that Mad-Eye? You must have known what would happen if you went to Fudge with that file. You must have known that the whole Department of Mysteries would be held accountable. Why did you do it?” Tonks asked.

“Because Sol is my student. I’ll be damned if I let someone get away with hurting my student. You and Sol were the best students I ever had, I’ll be damned if I let anything happen to either of you. And if I can’t stop it, I’m damn well going to get retribution for it,” Moody said, his voice fierce but soft. Tonks was blushing slightly and Moody pulled her into a one armed hug.

“Thank you, Alastor,” Severus said, and Harry knew that he was saying more than just a simple thank you. He leaned in and kissed his husband softly, and then lay his head on Severus’ shoulder, those strong slim arms coming around him.

“I did it for one reason and one reason only. Sol is one of mine and I want to be able to sleep at night. I did it for all of us, Severus. We can sleep easy knowing she’s safe. I’ll be sent to hell if I let someone jeopardise that.”

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When Dumbledore arrived with Ron and Hermione two hours later, Solarin was still hiding herself away. Bill had opted to help his mother in clearing the house to distract himself. 

Buckbeak had been released into the wild, much to Hagrid’s delight. Kreacher the house-elf had died some months ago and with him the remaining dark magic in the house had finally dispersed. The tapestry of the Black family tree had fallen off the wall, as had the finally silent portrait of Sirius’ mother and the mounted heads of house elves. The house was slowly being cleared out of any lingering dark artefacts and no one could say that they had ever seen the house look better. Sirius and Remus had spent the small hours of that morning cleaning up the living room and it looked like nothing had happened in there, though there were no ornaments and there was the lingering smell of smoke.

Severus met Dumbledore in the kitchen, Hermione and Ron looking nervous.

“Harry is in the living room, waiting for you. Hermione, would you like some tea to settle the baby?” Severus asked kindly at the sight of the witch resting her hands on her prominent bulge. Molly had been right, Hermione was twice the size of Harry around the middle.

Ron and Hermione looked at him in shock and he chuckled. “Your friend has had a good effect on me,” he joked and they smiled, sitting at the table and accepting tea.

“Professor, how is Harry?” Hermione asked. Severus admired the way she had kept her mouth shut over the fact that her friend had married a teacher. He also suspected that she was responsible for her husbands silence.

“He is very well. A little nervous about seeing you both but he is looking forward to it.”

“Is there anything we shouldn’t say or do? We don’t want to upset him,” Ron asked.

“Don’t touch him unless he initiates contact. Don’t mention toast. Let him lead the conversation, he’ll let you know what topics are suitable. Let him lead, it’s always the safest bet with Harry,” Severus advised. “He is still Harry, he’s just a little different than you knew him to be. Try to keep in mind that he is pregnant and his hormones have a tendency to run a little wild. Just remember that he’s identified as male and it’ll all go smoothly.”

They drank their tea quickly and Severus led them up to the living room, the door wide open and Harry sitting in an armchair, appearing to be peacefully reading a book with Remus at his side.

“Harry, your friends have arrived, love,” Severus said gently. “I’ve got it from here, Remus.”

Remus nodded and grasped Harry’s hand with a reassuring smile before he left the room, heading upstairs. Severus led Ron and Hermione in and tried not to laugh when he noticed that Harry’s book was upside down. Harry never had perfected acting relaxed.

Severus sat himself beside Harry in the chair Remus had vacated, Ron and Hermione choosing to sit down opposite them. The scene was silent and tense and Severus waited for Harry to make the first move.

“I don’t blame you, Ron,” Harry said quietly, the redhead looking at him curiously. “For telling Severus about my bleeding. I don’t blame you for telling.”

Ron looked incredibly relieved. Harry had always known how to handle him. It was no great shock that Harry had known he was feeling guilty. “I’m so sorry, mate. I was scared for you, I thought it might help them find you,” Ron admitted and Harry smiled gently.

“It doesn’t matter. I probably would have done the same if our roles were reversed. It’s okay. It doesn’t matter now, anyway. I have the evidence of what I am under my shirt,” Harry said with a wide smile, laying a hand on his bump.

Hermione giggled. “Harry, you’re tiny. It’s not fair, I look like a whale.”

“No, you look pregnant. And, believe me, I feel the same. I was teeny to begin with, I’m definitely feeling the strain even if I am smaller than you,” Harry reassured, the witch smiling at him.

Harry pulled Severus closer to him. “I’m okay now,” he said quietly. The two of them had agreed that Severus would stay with him until he felt comfortable and then he would leave the three friends to catch up alone. 

Severus kissed him gently, ignoring the badly concealed surprise from the two visitors, and nodded. He stood and excused himself, leaving the room. He stood on the stairs and smiled as he heard giggles.

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Severus found himself travelling the house aimlessly. He was slightly lost without Harry to distract him. They usually spent their afternoons talking about whatever came to mind, be it the baby or something else. He was at a loss. He wouldn’t interrupt Harry and his friends, he didn’t want to join Molly in her cleaning of the house and, for the first time in he didn’t know how long, he had no desires to brew any potions.

Severus found himself in the library, a room situated next to the living room and rarely entered. The room was dark and still, the smell of old pages lingering in the air. He felt incredibly calm in this room and faintly wondered why he had avoided it before now. He perused the titles on the shelves, intrigued by the rather substantial collection of Muggle literature. Probably Remus’ collection.

“Do you think this is what she meant?”

Severus jumped as the voice floated out to him and it took him a minute to locate where it had come from. Tucked into the window seat and partially hidden by the loose curtains, Solarin stared out of the window to the street below.

“So this is where you’re hiding,” Severus said as he joined her on the window seat, curling his long legs up so he sat Indian style opposite her. He rested his elbows on his knees and rested his head in his hands, looking at her. She had been crying, he could still see the tear tracks. “Do I think what is what who meant?”

“Mum. Do you think my freedom is what she meant when she used to say it?”

“Say what?” Severus asked, careful to keep his voice gentle. Solarin had not talked of their mother since she was five and Severus had allowed her silence. But now she was offering to discuss her and Severus was going to tread carefully.

“That we were worth more than all the gold in Gringotts. When Mad-Eye said it, I just started thinking of her. Do you think this is what she meant?”

Severus contemplated it. He had forgotten their mothers old saying. It hadn’t even occurred to him that Mad-Eye’s words had made something other than relief rise in his sister.

“I think she meant that she loved us. I think she meant that we were precious to her, more precious than anything else.” He sighed. He had known that one day this conversation would come up, but he had never really been able to prepare himself for it. What their father had done had been horrific, barbaric. How did you even begin to try and understand it? “Sol…when mum died and I took custody of you, I never regretted it for a moment. Some of the best days of my life were spent taking care of you.”

“I know. We were happy together, we were a team. We still are,” she replied. She wouldn’t look at him, but he didn’t expect her to. Solarin, despite being an augur, had never been good at talking about her own emotions.

“I tried to give you everything I could. My only regret is that I was never able to give you her,” Severus confessed, watching a fresh tear slide down her cheek.

“I never expected you to. You performed magic, not miracles. Besides, I don’t remember ever missing out. I had you, that was enough for me.”

“But it has always seemed unfair to me that I got to have so much time with her and you so little,” Severus argued.

“It’s just the way it is. I had you, you were enough for me. I remember you always second guessing yourself, always wondering if you were a good enough parent for me, if you were going to turn out like him. You’re nothing like him, Sevus. You’re a good man, you’re a million times the man he ever was.”

The two of them sat in silence for an hour, and the one after it. Severus could hear Harry laughing and joking with his friends and felt thankful that he didn’t have a connection with him like Solarin had with Bill. He wondered how she had managed to keep her early years from him. This was something he didn’t want to share with his little elfin beauty. His childhood was something he would never discuss with anyone but his sister. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Harry with it, or that he was trying to protect him from the details, but it was something he felt was private. Solarin would always be the only one who could truly understand and Severus couldn’t decide if he was thankful for that or saddened by it.

“Did you know that she was leaving him?” Solarin asked him, lighting a cigarette.

“No,” Severus replied and he watched her nod slowly, allowing her to light up without complaint. He finally understood why she smoked. Their father had always hated it.

“The day she died she was leaving him. She was wearing a blue jumper and a grey skirt. She was wearing the black boots I used to hide my dollies in. Her coat was beige. She hadn’t packed any bags, she just put my coat on me and said that we were going on an adventure. It was just after he broke your arm, do you remember?”

“Yes. I was at the old factory. I used to go there to get out of the house. I was only a few days out of Hogwarts. Dumbledore was still trying to put together the things for me to get the two of you out of there,” he confirmed.

She nodded. “It was raining and you’d gone out without your coat. Mummy said I could be a special girl and carry it to you. She said that we were going to go and get you and then the three of us were going to go on a special adventure. Dad came in, he’d been drinking. I could smell it. Mummy told him we were going to the shops to get some milk. He smiled and told her to hurry back. We were going to walk along the river and then go back along the back streets to get you. We only got as far as the river.”

Severus watched her as she ran her hands along the glass, fighting for the words to say. She looked like their mother. They had both inherited their fathers dark eyes and hair, his thinness, but Solarin had the look of their mother. She had her face shape, her easy smile, her gentle nature. Solarin may have had a bit of a temper, but she was more likely to joke with you and make you cookies than lash out at you. 

Solarin was the only person on the planet who had seen what had happened to Eileen Prince-Snape at the hands of her husband. Severus had always wanted to know but Albus had told him to leave it be. Pressuring her to tell him would have caused more problems than it solved. Albus had told him that she would tell him when she was ready. Severus had never bargained on it taking nearly nineteen years.

“We were walking along the riverbank, laughing and singing. We were singing nursery rhymes. Dad came out of nowhere, I didn’t even sense him coming. He grabbed her hair and hit her in the back. He said that she was a whore, that me and you probably weren’t even his. That we were probably the children of one of her freak friends. She pulled out her wand to try and stop him but he grabbed it. He snapped it over his knee and threw it into the river. She was crying. He ripped off her coat and threw that into the river as well. It was her good one. I remember wondering what she’d wear. He pinned her to the ground and I thought that he was trying to stop her running or something. I should have run, should have come and got you, but I couldn’t leave her. She looked so scared.” She took a deep shuddering breath and Severus knew to stay silent. To interrupt her now would do more harm than good. She wiped away her tears. “He was pushing at her skirt and she tried to push his hands away. He hit her, really hard. He bent one of her wrists back. It snapped. She was telling him to stop, that he was wrong, that she would never do that to him, that we were his. He kept saying that he’d show her what a whore she was. Her arguing with him just made him worse. He started pounding on her, hitting her everywhere. And then he was yanking at her skirt. He ripped her tights, the ones that I used as a skipping rope the day before. She was crying and I got mad. I hurt him and then he got really mad.”

She ran her pale hands through her dark hair, making it spill into her eyes, stick to her tears.

“He wasn’t down for long, I wasn’t strong enough then to hurt him with any force. He grabbed me and started shaking me. You told me later that you heard me screaming and I suppose that him grabbing me must have made me do that but I don’t remember screaming. He threw me down and started to hit me, on my back mostly. I curled into a ball the way you used to. It seemed to help you, I thought that it might help me too. He kept screaming that I was a bad girl, that it was my fault, that I was a freak. And then mummy was there, pulling him off of me, pushing him back. She looked so angry. He stumbled and nearly ended up in the water. Then he was against her. I thought that he was trying to hug her, the way he always used to after he hurt her, after he was bad.”

“She was screaming and I couldn’t understand why she was on the floor again. I crawled to her and she was holding her stomach. There was so much blood. I thought it looked like that bottle of ketchup I spilled once, the one that went all over the good table cloth. She was shaking. You were there, you hit dad with your cast and he went flying into the river. There were sirens and the neighbours all around us. Mummy was looking at me, with her big brown eyes. She said it then. She said “My babies are worth more to me than all the gold in Gringotts.” And then she looked like she was sleeping. I shook her, do you remember? She wouldn’t wake up and I couldn’t understand why. Then you were there, and you picked me up and carried me to the house. You sat me on the sofa. You locked the door and stuck your head in the fire. Dumbledore arrived. He pretended to be our grandpa.” She let out a small shaky laugh. “He was so good at it. He dealt with the police for us. We sat together all afternoon, you and me. I was on your lap and you told me about the angels, about where mummy had gone. That night I woke up crying and crawled into your bed, you held me all night.”

She finally looked at him and reached forwards, wiping away tears that he hadn’t realised he had shed. 

“You were my hero. My big brother. My Sevus. No man will ever take your place. No man ever saved me like you,” she said. She crawled forwards and settled herself in his lap, curled up with her head on his chest the way they had been all those years ago, that rainy day in June.

They cried together and stayed like that all afternoon, missing lunch. They stayed like that all afternoon, and ignored Molly calling them for dinner. They ignored Sirius coming to find them and Remus asking them if they were all right. 

They didn’t move until Harry and Bill came to get them together, the redhead and the brunette holding out their hands to the siblings, each taking their one and leading them from the room, leading them away from being four and seventeen, away from that rainy afternoon in June and into a future that seemed bright.

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After dinner Harry found that he had a few hours before Ron and Hermione had to return to Hogwarts. Dumbledore had joined them for dinner as had Moody, the grizzled wizard running several complicated spells on his plate to check for poisons out of sheer habit.

They all found themselves in the living room. Harry found himself curled in Severus’ lap, Ron and Hermione copying their pose across the room. Molly and Arthur had taken a sofa, as had Remus and Sirius. Draco and Charlie were occupying two armchairs side by side. Harry grinned at them. They seemed very cosy, even if they didn’t touch. Dumbledore and Moody had chosen chairs near the fire, and Moody had taken to tapping his wand against his knee.

Solarin was lying on the floor, on her front on a pile of pillows. Bill seemed to be trying to build a house of cards on her back and Tonks was vandalising a picture of Minister Fudge on the front of that mornings Prophet. Solarin kept offering suggestions of what would be appropriate, preferring instead to ink over the picture of Rita Skeeter. Every time she spoke the house of cards crumbled and Bill growled, starting again. Harry suspected that she was doing it on purpose. 

Solarin and Severus had seemed happier than Harry could remember them ever being after they had been retrieved from the library. He wondered what had gone on between them in there but he knew that if he was meant to know then Severus would have told him so he left it alone.

They were all chatting about nothing in particular when Molly suddenly fixed Bill with a calculating glare, her lips twisted into a mocking smile.

“You know, no matter how often I got letters about Fred and George and how bad the letters got, they never even came close to the ones about you,” she announced, wagging a finger at a sheepish looking Bill. Solarin and Tonks were grinning.

“Come on, mum,” Bill said, laughter only a breath away. “I was never that bad. I still made it to being a prefect, and Head Boy.”

“Be that as it may, you were a hellion, all three of you.”

“It’s amazing that the three of you were never expelled, some of the things you did,” Charlie added, though he smiled. Harry got the feeling that there was a joke going on that he didn’t know about.

“I felt that maybe making Tonks and Bill into prefects might tame her a little,” Dumbledore said. “Alas, it seemed to make them all worse.”

Now even Dumbledore was smiling at the three on the carpet.

“What are they talking about?” Harry asked Severus, surprised that his husband was grinning as well.

“The Odd Trio,” Bill supplied and Harry was shocked that Hermione didn’t tumble out of Ron’s lap to the floor with how fast he shot up in his seat.

“No way! It can’t be you! No bloody way!” Ron yelled. Harry was relieved to see that Hermione and Draco looked as confused as he felt.

“Afraid so, little brother. That was us,” Bill confirmed.

“And you held out on us all these years. Some brother,” Ron joked.

“Can one of you explain what the hell the Odd Trio is and what they have to do with the three of them?” Harry asked, beginning to get pissed off.

“Harry, the Odd Trio were the worst pranksters to hit Hogwarts ever. They were worse than all the Marauders and Fred and George put together. They went down in Hogwarts history as the only students to ever get Albus,” Remus explained. “Their reputation also includes pranking every single one of the teachers and most of the students.”

“And that was the three of you?” Harry questioned, Tonks nodding though Bill and Solarin seemed to be consumed by a fit of giggles.

“If you were got by them you used to say that you were got by the ghosts,” Charlie offered.

“Why?”

“Because we could never prove who it was, they were too good. They got caught for a few of their weird and wonderful misdeeds but most of them went unsolved.”

“Though we were always aware of the situation,” Severus intervened.

“Didn’t stop us getting you several times,” Solarin replied.

“Unfortunately,” Severus grumbled with a smile.

“Tell us,” Draco said. “Tell us of your pranks.”

The three on the carpet looked at each other. “All right, but Solly’s telling it. She was the mastermind behind most of them,” Tonks said.

Solarin sat up and crossed her legs, a devious little smile on her face. “Fine, fine. Well, we were called the Odd Trio in school. A Gryffindor, a Hufflepuff and a Slytherin is quite a combination. We all dressed a little differently, and me and Tonks were different. It made us easily identifiable and we earned the nickname. But the name the Odd Trio didn’t become connected with all the pranks until after we left. Before that, we were called the Ghosts.”

She looked thoughtful. “Well, ask some questions and we’ll tell you,” she offered.

“Biggest prank?” Ron asked.

“Turning the whole school into a swamp. Every floor, every room, everything. Teachers offices, bathrooms, dorms, the whole place. We turned it into a swamp the Halloween of my third year. No one could prove it was us because we were in Hogsmeade at the time,” she supplied, Bill laughing beside her, Tonks sniggering. Her hair had turned a bright sunny yellow.

“Impressive,” Harry said.

“Thank you, we were rather proud of that one.”

“So, what was the one you did to Albus?” Sirius asked and Solarin actually collapsed in a fit of laughter.

“We…”

“You,” Bill argued. “That one was all yours, we had nothing to do with that one.”

“You’re right. The Dumbledore incident was all me. Well, I invented this charm to turn his hair and beard a bright luminous purple with green polka dots. He found it funny to begin with.”

“How long did it take to get rid of?” Sirius asked.

“Nearly two weeks. His amusement ran out after two days. I never got caught for it.”

“What about other students?” Harry asked.

“Well, the only notable one that comes to mind was the yeti incident. There was this group of Slytherin’s. They didn’t like the company I kept so I was the target of their bullying a lot. Bill got upset about it,” Solarin said. “We were standing outside Transfiguration one afternoon, I was waiting to go in for a lesson and Tonks and Bill were waiting with me. This group of Slytherin’s came along and we hexed them. Their entire bodies sprouted this six foot long hair. They looked like yeti’s. It took Madame Pomfrey three days to undo.”

The whole room roared with laughter and even Hermione looked impressed.

“How did you get the teachers?” Draco asked.

“Those were just too easy. They were so gullible,” Solarin said. “Well, Severus was a given, but we’ll get to him in a minute. Well, there was Flitwick. We charmed his eyes so that one morning he woke up and couldn’t see his legs. Took Pomfrey hours to figure that one out. Ummm, Hagrid we got with his coat. We charmed it to run around the room. Took him six hours to actually catch it. Filch we got by turning Mrs. Norris into a bat for the day. He cried about that one, come to think of it. McGonagall was the absolute best though.”

“And the one we got into the deepest trouble for,” Tonks supplied.

“True, it was the one we nearly got skinned alive for, never mind expelled,” Solarin giggled. “I convinced Tonks to transform into Bill for the day and I took polyjuice. We positioned ourselves so that she saw Bill everywhere. She thought she was going nuts.”

“We would have got away with that one if she hadn’t seen us all together,” Bill added.

Solarin laughed, light and airy. “She was so mad. She petrified us all and levitated us to Dumbledore’s office. Severus had to spend the next month smoothing her ruffled feathers to actually stop her from expelling Tonks and Bill, and Severus held the threat of expulsion over me for six months after that.”

“You needed something to curb you. Your pranks were starting to get a little out of hand. You seemed to calm down once you yourself became a prefect,” Severus supplied.

“You were very wise,” Solarin praised and Severus smiled fondly at her. “But we did get you more than anyone else.”

“She never told us why you were the most frequent target. We figured that she took offence at you being so harsh a teacher,” Tonks added.

“Well, as her brother, I was the obvious target.”

“So, what did you do to him?” Harry asked.

“Oh, all sorts! We turned his hair pink once, he spent a whole day looking like a salmon, then there was the time we turned his skin blue in the middle of a class. Couldn’t prove it as none of us were actually in that class. What else? Oh! We heard some Hufflepuff claim that he was so bad tempered because he never got laid and it gave us inspiration. We invented a charm to stick his legs together. He woke up one morning looking like a kind of half human, half merman. It was hilarious, watching him hop around his rooms. We were hidden in his closet. Took Dumbledore hours to end the spell.”

“Oh my God,” Harry laughed. Severus looked disapproving but he was still smiling, so Harry figured he was taking it all in good fun. He wasn’t so sure Scary Professor Snape had seen the funny side though.

“We were the reason he started locking his potion stores so well. It was one of the last ones we ever did together before me and Bill graduated,” Tonks said.

“What did you do?” Hermione laughed.

“Well, we snuck in and rearranged all the jars. We swapped over some labels too, though we didn’t mislabel any of the dangerous ingredients, it was mostly things like camomile and aloe. Took him weeks to reorganise it. He was bitching about that one all summer,” Solarin said. “All in all, there were very few people we didn’t get at least once.”

“You never managed to get me,” Charlie argued. Solarin grinned.

“Oh yes we did,” Tonks said. Charlie looked incredulous. He had been at Hogwarts with them, two years above Bill and Tonks and three years above Solarin.

“How? When?” Charlie spluttered.

“It was your fifth year. Me and Tonks were in our third and Arin was in her second. You were sitting doing your History of Magic homework in the Great Hall, one day after dinner. It was still packed in there. We charmed a quill so that no one but us could see it and then we floated it behind you. We tickled you with it, the back of your neck, your hands, your arm, that space on your back between your shirt and your trousers. You kept scratching at it. Honestly, it looked like you had fleas,” Bill explained, Charlie’s jaw dropping further and further as he went on.

“You gits! I couldn’t get a date for the rest of my time there because of you three!” Charlie argued.

“You asked for it. You bragged the Ghosts couldn’t get you. You shouldn’t issue a challenge if you can’t handle the consequences.”

Charlie looked a little annoyed but mostly cheerful as he relaxed into his chair again.

Harry sat there, listening to all of their pranks, until the time came for his friends to leave. He snuggled down into Severus’ embrace that night with a big smile. He couldn’t remember ever having so much fun.

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Severus awoke at two am to find himself alone in bed and the bedroom door wide open. It was two weeks after Harry’s visit with his friends and Severus had found Harry to be more relaxed than ever. Ron and Hermione had visited twice more, the second time bringing Neville and Luna with them at Harry’s request. Harry had thoroughly enjoyed Luna’s zany pregnancy tips, not following a single one. It seemed to be becoming a regular Saturday event, Harry disappearing for hours on end to spend time with his friends. Severus had taken to spending time with Solarin and Bill during these periods of solitude, actually finding that he enjoyed the curse breakers company. Severus had become accustomed to Harry’s newly developed pregnancy quirks. Severus was now used to Harry having acquired odd little habits, like covering his scrambled eggs with chocolate syrup. But he had never woken to find Harry missing from their bed. It was always Severus who stirred first.

He slipped from the bed and pulled on his robe, padding out into the hall to find his little elfin beauty. He began in the nursery, a room that Harry spent a lot of time in. He smiled at the room even though he found it empty and he leaned in the doorway, looking at it. He had never imagined finding love, let alone that he would be standing here a mere two weeks away from being a father. He felt incredibly blessed.

The room was the pale yellow of Harry’s choosing. Solarin had told them that every emotion was a different colour to her. The augur had explained that she felt emotions dance over her skin and then she looked at the people around her. The person the emotion had come from was surrounded by a coloured glow. To her, pure happiness was a soft yellow.

The room held an antique rocking chair that had been a gift from Tonks’ mother. It faced the window and Harry spent a lot of time sitting in that chair, talking to the baby. The ornately carved crib that had once held Severus, and then Solarin, stood in pride of place in the centre of the room. His mother had hidden the Prince family heirloom in the attic at Spinners End and Severus was glad to see that his father had not managed to destroy it. It held fluffy blue blankets and soft stuffed toys. A mobile of different coloured dragons that had been a gift from Charlie hung over it, spinning slowly. There was an ornate chest of drawers that Sirius and Remus had gifted them with. It held an extortionate amount of baby clothes, and there was the assorted lotions and potions associated with newborns gathered on the top. There were little teddy bears on broomsticks stencilled on the walls near the ceiling, the pictures charmed to move and fly around the room, chasing a snitch.

Harry had been right, it was perfect for their child. Severus wrapped his robe tighter around himself and went off to search the rest of the house. He knew that everyone else was sleeping and it gave him the feeling of great stillness.

He finally found Harry in the kitchen, standing by the kitchen counter wearing nothing but his bra and boxers. He was eating ice cream from the tub and Severus felt his blood rush at the sight.

“Harry?” Severus asked softly. “What are you doing up?”

“I was hungry and I wanted something sweet. So I came down and found the ice cream. Want some?” Harry asked, holding out the loaded spoon with his loaded question. Severus prowled forwards, devouring the dessert.

“The bed is cold without you,” Severus complained.

“I’ll help you warm it in a minute,” Harry offered, feeding Severus another spoonful. Harry suddenly got a lusty gleam in his eyes and it made Severus shiver in anticipation of what his husband had come up with this time.

As Harry had progressed with his pregnancy, he had become more eager in their intimacy. Each day saw Harry having Severus take him at least three times, if not more. Harry seemed to walk around in a permanent state of excitement. Severus was all too happy to oblige, and he was just thankful that they had stopped short of giving everyone else in the house a show.

“Severus,” Harry said, drawing his voice out in a low caress, setting the tub and the spoon down on the counter.

“Yes?” Severus replied, biting back a moan as Harry slid his hands across his chest, as he pulled off Severus’ robe, letting it pool at his feet.

“How about we warm this kitchen counter first?” Harry asked, nipping at his lovers throat.

Severus devoured Harry’s mouth, pushing him back to press against the counter. He pushed down Harry’s boxers and hoisted him onto the counter, Harry spreading his legs immediately, grabbing Severus’ hips to pull him forwards. Harry had already had Severus take him four times that day, and Severus put this sudden passion down to hormones, letting himself enjoy the ride. He seemed to be Harry’s favourite craving and he loved it. Harry’s arms came around his neck and pulled him into a scorching kiss, their tongues battling furiously. Severus pushed down his own boxers and moaned as Harry’s hand slipped down to stroke him, his cock already painfully hard. They had gotten rougher with each other, but never to the point of Severus causing bruises. Severus loved treating his lover like spun glass and Harry adored being treated that way.

“Harry,” he moaned, letting his fingers caress Harry, stroke him, slip into him, finding him wet and ready.

“Please, Severus, I need it,” Harry gasped. Severus slid into him slowly and the two of them stilled, savouring the moment. Harry wrapped his arms around Severus and pulled him in for a messy kiss. Severus held Harry’s hips as he began to move, Harry’s legs coming up to wrap around him. Neither of them would last long, they knew that, they never did when Harry was in one of these moods. But Severus had learnt to relax into them, learnt to make it good for both of them through its speed.

All too soon, Harry was yanking at his hair, screaming into his mouth, thrusting desperately against Severus’ invasion of his body, the two of them tumbling over the edge in an explosion of cries and kisses.

“I love you, Severus,” Harry whispered against his lips, the two of them still joined.

“I love you.”

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A week after the kitchen incident, Harry found himself alone with Hermione in the living room, having a peaceful Saturday lunch. Ron had landed himself in detention, and Harry had not been in the mood to endure Neville and Luna’s tips on babies. His patience was a little thin, had been for the last few days. He had felt that Hermione was the only one who could understand how uncomfortable he was now.

“How am I meant to stand this? I can’t get comfortable, no matter what I do,” Harry complained, shifting in his seat.

“How long have you felt awkward?” Hermione asked, taking a sip of tea.

“About a week. Not to give too much information, but me and Severus haven’t had sex for a whole week. I just can’t stand it, it’s too uncomfortable,” Harry revealed, trying not to laugh as Hermione snorted into her teacup.

“Ummm, well…Hold on, I just need to try and get over that little statement,” Hermione laughed. After a minute, she shook her head and smiled at him. “Sorry, I’m okay with you being with Professor Snape, but you keep catching me off guard with it.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay, I just keep forgetting that you two are intimate. I think that’s a good thing. My head might explode if I think too deep into it. I’m still kind of shocked that you married a teacher.” The two of them giggled. “No, he makes you happy, that’s all I need to know,” she said, smiling as he grasped her hand. She leaned a little closer. “Me and Ron haven’t done it in weeks. I know exactly how you feel.”

“So, how do you get comfortable? And how do you stop Ron getting pissed off with it? I mean, Severus seems to be fine with it, he’s really great with it actually. But Ron can be a bit of a hot head. How do you stop him feeling left out?”

“I find hot baths help. Oh, you know those ice pack things they put in lunch boxes?” Harry nodded. “I use a bandage to wear one against my lower back, it helps a little. Hot and cold, the extremes really help me, they might work for you too. As for intimacy, Ron’s taken to rubbing my belly with baby oil. It helps him feel involved and, my god, does it feel good to have him do it. It helps stop the tightness in the skin,” Hermione advised.

“That might be an idea. So, you looking forward to it, being a mum?” Harry asked.

“Kind of. I think, at this point, I’m more looking forward to not being pregnant anymore.” They giggled and Harry was forever in her debt when she conjured a napkin into an ice pack for him. It was absolute heaven. Thank god the witch knew more spells than most. “Seriously, I think that Molly’s more excited about being a grandma than I am about being a mother. But I am looking forward to it. I can’t wait to take her to the park for the first time, and hear her first word,” Hermione divulged. “Aren’t you excited?”

“I guess.”

“What’s on your mind?” Hermione asked at his sudden worried look.

“I am looking forward to it, really. It’s just…”

Hermione sat silently, letting Harry lead like Snape had told her to. She wondered what was going on inside her friends head. She knew that she herself had her doubts about becoming a parent, but Harry had a whole different set of issues. Hermione couldn’t imagine having gone through what Harry had to get his baby.

“It’s just, he’s safe where he is. While he’s still inside me, Lucius can’t get to him. Once he comes out, what if I can’t protect him?” Harry whispered, staring at his bump.

Hermione got out of her seat, with a little trouble, and knelt down in front of him. She rested her head on his knees and looked up at him. 

“Harry, I hate to say it but you have a bit of a saving people thing. You managed to save the whole world from Voldemort. You will have no trouble keeping your child safe,” she reassured.

“But I had all of you to help me save the world,” Harry argued. Severus had been right that first morning. Harry was stubborn. He had begun to cry and Hermione passed him a tissue.

“And you have all of us now. Do you really think that Severus will let anything happen to his chance of fatherhood, let anything happen to either of you? He loves you more than anything else. Do you think that any of us would let anything happen to your baby? And I have to say, from my research, Solarin is one scary witch. The books say that she can do things that would make your eyes pop out.” Harry laughed shakily. “No one is going to let Lucius have him. None of us will let Lucius near either of you, especially once he’s born.”

Harry took a deep breath and nodded, moving slowly to the floor and into her arms, letting his best friend save him for once.

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The letter arrived with dinner and had Solarin squealing in an uncharacteristic display of girly excitement. Harry thought she looked three instead of twenty three.

“Would you like to tell us what the shrieks of glee are for or should we begin to guess?” Severus drawled, watching his sister dance around the kitchen.

“I’m singing at Enchantment on Monday night!” Solarin announced, draping herself across Bill’s back and waving the parchment in his face. He laughed and it took him four attempts to actually grab it.

“What’s Enchantment?” Harry asked.

“It’s a club in Diagon Alley. It’s pretty swanky, really upmarket. A lot of Aurors and Ministry officials go there after work. It’s a big deal to perform there,” Sirius answered. “How’d you score a gig like that?”

“I know the owner, his name is Jean-Claude. I used to sing there before I left the Wizarding World. When I stopped, Jean-Claude gave me an open invitation to come back. I sent him a letter a week ago and he sent me this. I’m the headliner for Monday night,” Solarin said proudly. “I have a sound check tomorrow and then I go on at eight.”

“Can we go?” Harry asked, Severus looking at him in bewilderment.

“Go where?” the Potions Master asked.

“To Enchantment. Can we go and watch her perform?”

Severus looked at Harry in amazement. “You want to?” Harry nodded and Severus looked at his sister.

“He’ll be surrounded by Aurors. I’ll be there, so will Bill. And you, of course,” Solarin reasoned. “Sirius, Remus, you want to come?” The two nodded and she received confirmations from Tonks, Charlie and Draco as well. “We’ll all be there. He’ll be surrounded by people to protect him and I’ll have a word with Jean-Claude. He can make special arrangements. He’ll be very well protected.”

“How can you be sure that Jean-Claude will give in to your requests?” Remus asked and Bill gave a smirk.

“Well, considering I’m the witch who brought in the biggest profits he’s ever had I’m thinking that he’ll give me anything I want. He’s not having such great luck at the moment getting good acts. According to the letter, I’m making quite a stir already and the fliers have only just gone out. Jean-Claude will give me anything I ask for if I bring him money in,” Solarin said.

“So, can we go?” Harry asked again.

“I see no reason why not,” Severus said and smiled as Harry beamed at him.

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Monday rolled around and Harry could hardly contain himself. For the first time in days he actually felt somewhat comfortable and more energetic than he had his whole pregnancy. He couldn’t wait to actually get to the club.

Solarin had spent most of yesterday at Enchantment and Bill had gone with her. Bill said that they would love the show and Solarin had grinned. She had made special arrangements for Harry to be there. Jean-Claude had been so grateful that she had agreed to perform that he had agreed immediately to her requests. Harry knew that the bouncer would be on his guard for Lucius, as would Jean-Claude and the barman. They had a secluded table in the back, half hidden in the shadows so Harry didn’t have to deal with people staring at him all night and Solarin would be watching the whole place from on stage. 

They arrived at the club at about seven so that they could get settled before the doors opened at half past and Solarin went on at eight. They were greeted by Jean-Claude himself, who turned out to be a French wizard who looked like your typical Hollywood vampire. He had slicked back black hair and was very pale. He was wearing a white shirt with lace ruffles. He had a tendency to kiss Solarin’s hand and call her ‘ma petite’ which made Bill growl slightly. 

Solarin herself looked every inch the rock star. She had dressed in black jeans that appeared painted on and a red and black corset. Her dark hair was hanging loose and her makeup was expertly applied. The dark eye shadow made her eyes seem to burn. Her boots were knee high dragon hide and her belt was studded with rhinestones. Her black fishnet gloves and a black leather choker completed the look.

Harry found himself safely secluded in the corner of their booth with Severus to his right and Remus to his left. Mad-Eye had even come along and he hovered near the table, looking suspiciously at everyone. Harry was surprised but elated when Fred and George strolled in at ten to eight and joined them, amusing them with tales of their more unusual customers.

At eight, the lights went down and Harry jumped as Solarin appeared, encased in flames. Bill explained that while on stage she did quite a few magic tricks that the average witch couldn’t produce. It was how she made the club more money in one night than it made in a whole month. Considering it was a very successful bar, that was saying something. Harry relaxed into it and thoroughly enjoyed watching her. Her tricks ranged from making the whole crowd euphoric, to casting an illusion to make it seem like there were three of her on the stage, all dancing around. 

She was really good, Harry decided. Her voice could go from husky and soulful to light and airy. The music was a good mix of rock and pop, with a few dance numbers thrown in. Solarin was dancing provocatively with one of the guitarists and Harry could hear Severus and Bill plotting beside him.

“Maybe if we both ganged up on her, she’d stop doing that,” Bill suggested, glaring at the man grasping Solarin’s hips as she swayed them.

“That’s a good idea. It might just work,” Severus agreed, sipping at his butterbeer.

Bill flinched. “She’s telling me to relax, it’s just dancing,” he revealed.

Harry laughed and grinned up at her.

The evening went on so smoothly that Harry was completely caught off guard when Lucius strolled up to the bar and ordered a drink at half nine.

Solarin’s eyes narrowed and Harry clutched at Severus, pointing out the blonde to his husband, who alerted the rest of their group. 

“Solarin’s telling me to tell you all to stay where you are. She says that Lucius is hers tonight,” Bill said. They all stayed sitting, and Severus pushed Harry further back into his seat, cloaking him in shadows. One of the backing singers took over from Solarin and she came floating through the crowd to the table. Jean-Claude glided up beside her, his face dark with anger.

“He has rendered my bouncer unconscious without his wand,” Jean-Claude said to her. “I can alert some Aurors to get rid of him for you, ma petite.”

Harry was incredibly afraid. He had met the bouncer, his name was Joe and he was huge. He was six foot four, and had arms bigger than his pregnant waist. That Lucius had knocked him out with only his fists made his heart pound.

“No. Leave him to me, Jean-Claude. Lucius is mine tonight. Carry on like nothing is happening,” Solarin said calmly. Harry could feel panic start to rise in him, but he was suddenly struck by how scary Solarin looked right then. It didn’t help him much.

The augur moved around the table and leaned in close to Severus. 

“Trust me. Give me Harry,” she said. 

“Are you completely barmy?” Severus asked.

“No, I’m angry. Trust me, I won’t let anything happen to him. But I need him to help me deal with Lucius. Give me Harry.”

Severus looked at Harry and the hermaphrodite nodded, easing himself out of his seat and taking Solarin’s hand. The witch led him away from Severus and turned to face him.

“Harry, I need you to trust me and do as I tell you. I promise that I won’t let him touch you, I’ll keep you safe, and when I’m done you can go right back to Severus. I promise that I will never ask you to do anything like this again but this experience will be something you enjoy in the end. Okay?” she asked.

Harry nodded, not trusting himself to speak at that point.

“Good. Right, I need you to panic for me. Imagine that Severus is not here. I need you to panic the way you did when you first came to us. Can you do that for me?” Harry nodded and let his panic rise, let it consume him. Solarin’s eyes were watering slightly. “Whoa, that is strong panic,” she breathed. “It’s perfect. Harry, I want you to cast your mind back, I want you to remember how much pain you were in, how much pain he caused you. I want you to go back to that room again, just for now.”

Harry nodded and hugged her slightly. He had no other way of telling her that even through his panic, even through the memories that threatened to suffocate him, he was still all right. He was with her, he was okay. She nodded and took him by the hand. “I will not let go of you until I send you back to your seat. Then Tonks will take you back. If you want to pull out, tell me.”

He shook his head and she led him to the bar, led him so that they were standing just behind Lucius. She reached out and tapped him on the shoulder. He turned and smiled at them, Solarin pulling Harry slightly behind her.

“My my my, look at this. The famous Solarin Snape and my little whore. Solarin, I haven’t seen you for years, not since you were seven. I must say, you have grown up,” Lucius said, eyeing her perversely, his eyes seeming to undress her. “I must say, I was delighted to hear of the changes in the augur law. You must be so pleased.”

“Ecstatic,” she deadpanned and Lucius nodded slightly before he focussed his attentions on Harry.

“My little legend. How I have missed you. Haven’t you missed me? Missed our little sessions together? I’ve missed you writhing beneath me,” Lucius said, a wide dangerous smile on his face. Harry felt his panic reach fever pitch as Lucius reached for him, probably intending to pat his bump. He kept remembering the stabbing pain of the Cervix Shields, the pain of Lucius inside him. He kept his mind away from Severus and his gentle lovemaking, of his reverence as he touched Harry. “You are looking big now. I can’t wait to meet my son.”

Lucius’ hand never reached it’s target. 

Solarin reached out and placed her hand on Lucius’ chest, right above his heart. It was immediate. The blonde wizard crumbled to his knees, gasping, trying to scream in pain through his sudden inability to take in a full breath. Solarin pulled Harry behind her and he placed his hands on her shoulders as she squatted down to Lucius’ level. No one in the crowd had even noticed. Solarin had placed them all under an illusion so they didn’t see what was happening right in front of them. But Harry, Jean-Claude and the rest of their party could see. 

“Awww, does that hurt?” she mocked and he nodded, his lips beginning to take on a blue tinge. She removed her hand and rested her chin in it, balancing her elbow on her knee, her other hand stroking over the back of Harry’s on her shoulder. “Really? Well, that is Harry’s panic that’s making it hard for you to breathe. It’s what’s making your heart pound, and what’s bringing on the cold sweat. It’s hard to see, right?” He nodded, his eyes wide with fear.

“Well, I just thought you should feel one of his panic attacks for once. Now, the pain that you’re feeling, the feeling of being tortured, that would be his pain, the pain you caused when you violated him. See, the Ministry taught me to transfer emotions. I thought you’d like to feel Harry’s as a gift. Do you like it?” He shook his head, trying to gasp out some words. He looked like he was dying and Harry felt sudden elation at the sight. 

“No? Really? I thought you liked Harry’s pain. After all, isn’t that why you spent all those months torturing him? No? Well, I just thought it might be a gift you’d like. Doesn’t it just make you hot, aren’t you getting your rocks off on it? No? Shame, I thought you’d love my gift. I thought you got off on pain.”

She beckoned Tonks over and Harry was pulled away slightly, but he refused to be led back to his seat. He wanted to see what she did next. Lucius seemed to be close to passing out, and there was blood pouring from his nose and eyes. He coughed and blood dribbled from his lips.

Solarin grabbed his chin and forced him to look at her. “Now, I’m not stupid enough to believe that this will keep you away from Harry and the baby permanently, but it might make you realise how foolish you are to think you’ll get anywhere near them. But let me educate you on a few things. I’m not seven years old anymore, and I’m not afraid of you like I was back then. I’m not a little girl who doesn’t have the power to take you on. I promise you if you come near my brother-in-law, or my nephew again, I will make this little experience feel like a holiday. You will wish for death. I’m stronger now, and I can take you on and win. Don’t be a fool and think you can win against me. Now, I’m going to stop this and you’re going to leave. You’re going to stay away from here tonight, because if I see you here again tonight they will be housing you in the St Mungo’s psychiatric ward for the rest of your life. Do you understand?”

He nodded and she smiled at him.

“Say ‘I understand’” Solarin instructed and he glared at her.

“I understand,” he gasped and she put her hand to his chest again, the rapist gasping in great lungfuls of air.

He scrambled to his feet and wiped away some of the blood. He backed away from her towards the door, Mad-Eye grabbing him and making him jump.

“Let me help you out, boy,” Mad-Eye said cheerfully, half dragging him to the door.

Lucius paused in the doorway and looked at Harry. “Be seeing you, my little legend. And I can’t wait to meet my son,” he said silkily before he was gone.

Solarin turned to Mad-Eye. “Take the door. I want someone I can trust to handle themselves on it if he’s stupid enough to come back,” Solarin ordered and Moody nodded. She turned to Jean-Claude. “Joe goes home. He’s had enough for one night. Send him home.” Jean Claude nodded and Solarin moved to the table.

“Is he all right?” Solarin asked Severus, looking at Harry.

“He appears to be,” Severus replied. He looked at her proudly. “That was impressive.”

“I learnt what I could from the Ministry. It’s a shame I can’t take Harry’s pain away from him.” She looked at Harry, the Gryffindor taking a shaky sip from his orange juice. “Harry, are you all right?”

He nodded and grinned at her. “That was brilliant,” he said quietly.

“Thank you. Glad you liked it. Would you like to go home?”

He shook his head. “No. I want to stay and enjoy the rest of the night.”

She nodded and Bill kissed her before she moved back to the stage, continuing her act as if nothing had happened.

Harry decided that he was rather glad that Solarin was on their side.

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Severus contemplated the last week as he dressed for the day. Harry had thoroughly enjoyed his night out and had raved about Solarin’s treatment of Lucius all week. Severus had become used to waking up alone and usually wandered down to the kitchen to find his lover pacing to ease his discomfort. Harry had taken to placing an ice pack in the tight band of his bra against his spine. He said it felt better. They hadn’t been able to make love since the kitchen incident but Severus hadn’t minded. They had developed an odd sort of routine before bed each night. Severus would rub baby oil or moisturiser into Harry’s bump and then Harry would sit there and watch while he touched himself. Harry seemed genuinely to enjoy watching Severus bring himself to climax. Harry was the one who asked him to do it every night. It was an odd sort of intimacy but they enjoyed it.

Harry had finally decided to call himself the carrier. He had reasoned that Severus was the father and mother was too feminine. He had explained that he still considered himself male and to call himself the father as well would cause the baby unnecessary confusion. He had rationalized that carrier was an appropriate name for himself and everyone had agreed to it.

They had gone through Harry’s birth plan almost daily, Severus wanting to ensure that Harry knew what was coming. The home birthing kit had taken up residence on the floor behind their bedroom door. Harry was due any day now, and he was sure that they were as ready as they could be. He had perfected three specialist potions for Harry. They and the painkillers were all ready in place for Harry when and if he needed them. The inhabitants of the house all seemed to be on a knifes edge, just waiting for something to happen. Severus could practically feel the anticipation in the air.

He was pulled out of his contemplation as Remus appeared in his doorway.

“Severus, something’s wrong with Harry,” Remus announced and Severus hastily tied his shoes with a spell.

“What kind of something? Tell me what’s happening,” Severus ordered, following Remus down the stairs.

“Well, he’s pacing and we didn’t see anything out of the ordinary. Then Solarin came in and she said that there was something off with him, that she could feel something almost like pain coming from him. We tried asking him what was wrong but he won’t talk to anyone, he just keeps pacing,” Remus explained. “It couldn’t be time, could it?”

“It probably is. We’re not sure when his actual due date is as we can’t be sure when he actually conceived. All we have are rough timetables. It’s roughly any day now.”

The two of them entered the kitchen and Severus moved to Harry, who was pacing. His hands were on his bump and he seemed to be rubbing it to try and make something go away.

Severus pulled Harry into his arms and held him around the ribs. The shorter man looked at him though he continued to rock side to side.

“Harry, talk to me love. Tell me how it feels,” Severus urged.

“Uncomfortable, like he’s pushing against me inside, like he doesn’t have enough room or something. And it keeps getting tight across my bump. It doesn’t hurt, just feels uncomfortable, like before, but worse, kind of. I know it’s not a good description, but I don’t know how else to tell you,” Harry explained, holding on to Severus’ shoulders as he rocked.

“It’s all right, love, I understand you. How long had this been going on?”

“Since quarter to one. I thought he was just restless so I came down to pace. I never made it back to bed. I was going to come and get you if it got worse. I thought it would go away.”

Severus glanced at the clock. It was now a quarter to seven.

“I think that it’s not going to go away, love. You’ve been at this for six hours.”

“I’ve started, haven’t I? He’s on his way, right?” Harry asked. Severus was bemused by how calm he sounded.

“Yes, love, I think he is. Hold on to Remus for me while I have a feel,” Severus instructed as he passed Harry to Remus. The hermaphrodite held Remus’ shoulders and he held his ribs while Severus slipped his hands down, feeling the swell of the child.

“He’s dropped, Harry. That’s why it feels like he’s pushing down inside you. He’s moved down. You’re right, Harry. You’ve started.”

Harry nodded and moved back to holding Severus once more, Severus motioning to Remus to sit down. Severus rubbed his hands along the bump, helping Harry to ease himself.

“Have you eaten anything?” Severus asked.

“I did eat a bagel at about four, but it didn’t stay down for long. And then my body decided to stage a mutiny. I think we can safely say that there’s nothing left in my system but a baby,” Harry joked.

“All right, I think we should stick to water or fruit juice for now, just to be on the safe side,” Severus mused. “Harry, why don’t you talk everyone through your birth plan?”

“Why? We went through it again last night,” Harry asked.

“Yes, we did, but they need to know as well. Why don’t you explain to them what you want while you bring him into the world?”

Severus was counting on Harry being so sure on the plan that he didn’t panic as he went from one stage to the next. He hoped his theory was right. It looked like this was going to take a very long time.

“Well, I’m going to move around and relax for a while,” Harry began, the people at the table watching him, listening to every word. “And then, when the pains get bad, I’m going to relax in the tub, ‘cause the water will help make it feel better and Severus has made me some potions that go in the bath. When it comes time to push, I want to do it in my room. So, Sirius is going to sit on the bed and I’m going to hold onto him. Remus is going to rub my back. Madame Pomfrey is going to be in there just to keep an eye on things. And Severus is going to help me deliver the baby. I’m going to be on all fours because the book says that it’s easier to push him out that way.”

“That’s very good, love. Perfectly remembered,” Severus praised. “Now, do you want me to pace with you?”

“No. Sit down, I’m okay. Have some breakfast or something,” Harry said. Severus took a seat at the table.

Seated around the table were Solarin, Bill, Draco, Charlie, Severus, Molly, Remus and Sirius. They all chatted about nothing in particular while all covertly keeping an eye on Harry. Draco refrained from asking Harry questions just then. He figured that Harry would probably snap at him.

As the hours wore on Harry began to grip the kitchen counter at regular intervals, gritting his teeth. It was just past noon when Harry moaned and called for Severus.

“Talk to me, Harry,” Severus urged as Harry gripped at him.

“It’s starting to hurt. It’s not too bad yet, but it’s starting to hurt,” Harry ground out through clenched teeth.

After that, Severus had to pace with Harry, the sprite grasping at him every so often as another contraction hit. At about one, Harry grabbed Severus hard and gasped, his eyes going wide.

Severus had grabbed at Harry as he had thrown his whole weight at him, his husband burying his head in his chest. Harry whimpered.

“Severus, I’m leaking,” Harry moaned, looking down at the puddle he was now standing in.

“It’s all right, Harry. It’s your waters breaking, it’s meant to happen,” Severus reassured as Sirius spelled away the mess and dried Harry’s trousers. “Solarin, would you go and run a warm bath in the bathroom nearest my room, please. Come on, love, it’s time for the bath now.”

Solarin and Bill hurried from the room and Severus chuckled at Harry’s amused reply.

“Already?”

“It’s been twelve and a half hours,” he said as he began to lead Harry to the door.

“Really? I didn’t notice the time passing,” Harry replied calmly. It was all okay, it was all going to plan. As long as they followed the plan, Harry reasoned, he would be fine.

“Sirius, you should call Albus now. He’ll know who else needs to be called. All of you stay down here until I call you. If you come up before you’re called, you’ll be deviating from the plan and Harry won’t do well with that,” Severus said as Harry rocked in the doorway. “Though, would one of you bring us some drinks in a few hours?”

All of them nodded and watched as Severus and Harry disappeared slowly up the stairs. 

The two Potter-Snape’s reached the bathroom just as Solarin turned off the taps.

“Sol, the home birthing kit is in my room, just behind the door. I have written out instructions for how it should be set up, they are secured to the top of the box. Could you please set it up for us?” Severus asked.

She nodded and moved from the room, Bill following her out. Severus closed the door and Harry leaned against the sink as Severus added the necessary potions.

“What do they do?” Harry asked as Severus poured in the last one. The water had taken on a blue tint.

“Well,” Severus began as he helped Harry strip off his clothes. “The first one is to relax your birth canal. This isn’t going to be easy for you, love, you’re very narrow, but the potion will help. The second one is to numb you slightly down below. It won’t take away all feeling, that wouldn’t be safe to do, but it will help. The third one will calm you and make it easier for you to sweat out the pains. Come on, in you go.”

Severus held Harry firmly as he lowered himself down, getting comfortable. Eventually, after many variations in position, he ended up on his knees, his head resting on his folded arms on the lip of the tub. Severus slid down the wall to sit beside his head.

“Better?” Severus asked at Harry’s relieved smile.

“Brilliant. It feels so much better now I’m in the water. How long can I stay in here?” 

“Until the time comes for you to push, that is if you still want to push him out in our room.”

“Yeah, in our room. So, I’ve got a while in here then?”

Severus considered it. “Depends on how far along you are. Is it all right if I check you?”

Harry nodded and Severus moved to Harry’s hips, thankful that he had worn a short sleeved t-shirt today. Harry grimaced as he slipped gentle fingers into him.

“So, you’re checking my cervix, right?” Harry asked.

“That’s right. I’m seeing how dilated you are.”

“And I have to be at ten for it to be time for me to start pushing, right?”

“Yes.”

“What am I now?” Harry asked as Severus removed his fingers and came to sit by his head again.

“Four.”

“Four? Four? That’s it? Twelve and a half hours and I’m only four?”

Severus smiled at him, running his fingers through the unruly hair. “Think of it like this. You’re almost half way there. Slow and steady is the best way. It’s better this way than if it came on fast.” Severus broke off as Harry gasped, grabbing his hands and groaning through clenched teeth. The pain passed and Harry panted as it faded. “Are you in pain, love? Do you want a potion?”

“No, not yet. It hurts, but it’s more uncomfortable than painful,” Harry explained. “Maybe in a bit, when it gets worse.” 

Severus was impressed by Harry’s calm acceptance of the fact that this pain would get worse.

They spent the next few hours talking about anything that came to mind, stopping regularly so Harry could moan at the pain, grasping at Severus. He continued to refuse the potions all throughout his time in the tub.

At about six, Solarin brought them up drinks.

“We’ve been invaded,” she said with a smile as she handed them their glasses of water, keeping her eyes on Harry’s face. “The kitchen is ram packed and the Weasley twins have opened a bookies at the table.”

“What’s the strangest bet?” Harry asked as Severus sloshed warm water over his back, placing his glass on the tiled floor.

“I can’t quite decide between you having twins or the baby turning out to be a girl,” she admitted, moving forwards and letting Harry clasp her hands tightly as another pain hit.

“Fuck!” Harry cried. This one was stronger than the ones before, and he hoped that it would all be over soon. He was very tired.

“Who suggested twins?” Harry asked as it passed.

“Who else? The twins,” she replied with a smirk.

“Well, tell them that they can fuck right off. Twins? They’re cruel. I’m going to get them for even suggesting such a thing,” he said and Solarin chuckled. “Who suggested that he’s a girl?”

“Luna. Strange witch, that one. Nice, but strange.”

“Definitely strange, but very nice with it. I admire her imagination, but I hope that she’s got the money to lose. I’m fabled, it’s written in stone, he’s a boy.”

“I’ll be sure to pass that on. I’ll leave you to it,” Solarin said, stroking Harry’s hair before she left the room, closing the door behind her.

“Luna is way out there and the twins are cruel,” Harry said to his husband.

“Very true. Harry, can I check you again?” Severus asked.

“Go on then, but if you tell me I’m only at five again, I’m going to hex you,” he warned, earning a smile. Those fingers slipped into him again and he scowled at the feel of them.

“Seven and a half, almost eight. Nearly there.”

“Good, I’m bloody tired,” Harry grumbled. “Why the hell does it hurt like this?”

“Your cervix is being pulled open with every contraction to allow the baby passage.”

“Wonderful.”

At ten pm, Severus left a very worn-out Harry in the tub and moved to the top of the stairs, calling down for Sirius, Remus and Poppy Pomfrey.

“It’s time,” he said, instructing Sirius on where to sit on the bed and placing a pillow across his lap for Harry to bite down on. He directed Poppy to a chair. It was placed far enough away for Harry to remain accepting of her presence but close enough for her to keep an eye on everything. He turned to Remus. “How’s it going down there?”

“Everyone keeps wondering what’s taking so long, and Draco has fallen asleep at the table,” Remus replied as the two of them moved to the bathroom. 

“Harry, come on, love. It’s time for you to push now,” Severus coerced as he and Remus helped him out of the tub, Harry refusing to put on his robe. Harry was in too much pain to care about his nudity.

They guided the exhausted being into the bedroom, Harry complaining that it had never felt like a thousand steps before, and eased him down onto his knees, Harry resting his head on the pillow across Sirius’ legs. Severus arranged his knees far enough apart for Harry to push without resistance that didn’t need to be there.

“It’s time, Harry. You need to push with the next pain,” Severus instructed. Harry shook his head, moaning his complaint. Remus knelt down and began to rub Harry’s back, Sirius began to wipe his face and neck with a cool wet cloth and Severus stroked his thighs and hips but still Harry continued to shake his head and voice his complaints.

“I don’t want to push,” Harry cried as another contraction hit. “I’m tired.”

“Harry, I know that you’re very tired and that you’ve been doing this for a very long time, but you need to push now,” Severus argued.

“No! Fuck you, you push!”

“Harry, please push for me, love.”

“No! Fuck off and leave me alone!”

Severus crawled up to lay his head beside Harry, stroking back his sweaty hair. Harry was sobbing and it broke Severus’ heart.

“Harry, I know you are very tired, and I know that you have been doing this for a very long time. I know this, but you just need to work hard for a little bit longer,” Severus enticed. “Once you push him out, we’ll let you sleep.”

“But he can’t come out!” Harry sobbed, closing his eyes against the pain. He reached out and grabbed Severus’ hand. “Please, Severus! You can’t let him come out! Make him stay where he is, please!”

“Why not, love?” Severus asked gently.

“Because he’s fine where he is, he’s safe there. He’s safe inside me, why can’t he just listen and stay there?”

“Because it’s time for him to meet us.”

“But Lucius can’t get him while he’s still inside me. He’s safe there. If he’s not inside me then Lucius can get at him,” Harry explained, looking at Severus with big green eyes. “If he comes out, Lucius can try and take him from me.”

“Harry, Lucius will never come near him, I promise. I won’t let him near our baby. But it’s time, love. You can’t stop this. The baby has decided that he wants out. He needs you to get him out into the world. He’s counting on you to do this,” Severus promised.

“It hurts, Severus,” Harry whimpered.

“I know it does, sweetheart. Do you want a potion now?”

Harry nodded and he fished the little bottle of green potion from his pocket. He helped Harry sit up enough to gulp it down before easing him back to his pillow.

“It won’t make the pain go away completely but it will take the edge off,” Severus explained and Harry nodded.

“You promise I can go to sleep after this?” Harry asked.

“I promise that as soon as he is out, we will do the rest and you can sleep,” Severus agreed.

“And you promise he’ll be safe once he’s out?”

“I swear on my life we’ll keep him safe once he’s out.”

Harry took a few deep breaths. “All right, I’ll push.”

Severus kissed him and moved back down, positioning himself to guide the baby out.

“All right, Harry, when the pain comes again, I want you to push down with as much force as you can, just like it says in your book,” Severus instructed, and, this time, Harry nodded.

Harry began to groan and Severus called at him to push. Harry did as he was told, grunting against it. They went on like this for a few more pushes before Harry screamed.

“Oh God! Inside, Severus, it hurts inside! I’m ripping, I can feel it!” Harry screamed, pulling at Sirius’ belt, the Animagus mopping cold water between Harry’s shoulder blades.

Severus slipped his fingers into him and felt the top of the baby’s head emerging through Harry’s cervix.

“He’s coming through your cervix, Harry. You’re not ripping, you’re just stretching. Come on, Harry, push!” Severus reassured, encouraging him to bear down as Harry groaned again, a new contraction rippling across him.

Harry continued to scream as he pushed, and Severus didn’t stop him, encouraging him with his pushes and rubbing his hands along his legs and hips in praise. Harry continued to push for hours, his screams getting a little louder with every one, the baby slowly inching it’s way down the too narrow passage, Harry eventually biting down on the pillow as it got worse.

At three am, after five hours of pushing, Severus could just see the top of the baby’s head if he held Harry open. Harry was worn out and fast approaching the point of giving up. Remus and Sirius were looking worried, but Severus was impressed by how reassuring they were to Harry through the bloodcurdling screams, how calm they sounded. Severus looked at Poppy.

“Is this right? He’s been pushing for hours and he’s not even crowned yet,” Severus asked. Poppy got up from her chair and peered over Severus’ shoulder, keeping her hands to herself as she examined what Severus was questioning about. She nodded to the Potions Master and moved so that Harry could see her. Harry acted as Severus had expected him to.

“Fuck off, I don’t want you! I want Severus, don’t you dare touch me!” Harry screeched at her.

“Harry, she’s not touching you, she just needs to ask you some questions,” Severus soothed, rubbing circles on the base of his spine. “I’m still here, it’s still only me touching you down below.”

“I don’t want to answer questions.”

“Harry, please. I need to know the answers.”

Harry fell silent and Severus nodded to Poppy. Sirius sponged at Harry’s face before she spoke, Remus rubbing his back.

“Harry, can you tell me how the baby feels?” she asked kindly. 

“What the fuck are you on about?” Harry demanded angrily.

“It’s a special kind of magic. Because we don’t have equipment to monitor him, your magic reaches inwards and you can tell how he feels,” she explained. “Can you tell us how the baby feels?”

Harry screwed up his face in concentration as he felt deep down inside to how his baby felt.

“He’s bored. And he’s tired,” Harry answered, reaching out and grabbing Remus’ hand. The werewolf returned the grip and stroked Harry’s shoulder with his other hand.

“But he’s calm? He’s not panicking?” 

“No. He’s fine, just tired and bored. And he doesn’t like being squeezed out, he’s uncomfortable. He’s fine,” Harry snapped.

“And how do you feel? Can you go on?”

“I suppose. I have to, don’t I? I don’t have a choice,” he said grumpily, moaning as yet another contraction started to break in him.

“How do you feel, Harry? The baby is tired and bored and doesn’t like being squeezed. Tell me how you feel,” she instructed, Harry glaring at her. His patience was wearing thin with her even being in the room and his body was wracked with pain again, so no one could really blame him for the way he answered her.

“How the fuck do you think I feel?” he yelled. “I’m fucking tired and in fucking pain! You try pushing a baby out and see how you bloody feel! Now, fuck off and leave me alone!”

Poppy backed off, her hands raised in a move of submission. Harry buried his head in his pillow and sobbed.

“I want it over! Just make it stop, please, make it stop!” he begged. “Please, I’ll do anything, just make it stop! Severus, make it stop! If you loved me, you’d make it stop for me!”

“I do love you but I can’t make it stop, Harry. If you keep pushing it will be over soon and it will stop,” Severus explained.

“Oh God!” Harry screamed as another pain hit but he didn’t push. He gripped at Sirius and Remus, buried his head in his pillow again and cried, screaming at the pain. Sirius and Remus murmured soothing words to him as Severus looked to Madame Pomfrey, who was reclaiming her seat.

“Poppy?” Severus asked as he stroked Harry’s legs through his screams, the sound going right through him and making him want to do something, anything, if Harry was just free of this pain. Harry was giving up, he could see it, no matter what he said about being able to go on. He knew his husband, and it didn’t matter what anyone told him, Harry was giving up.

“All births are different. This one is just very long. He says he can go on and he says the baby is fine. Give him another pain potion and get him to keep pushing,” Poppy advised. “Harry would know if the baby was in distress, and Harry would really be fighting against you if he couldn’t carry on. It’s all normal, Severus. Just carry on. There’s no other way, he has to push him out.”

Severus nodded and Remus wiped his forehead for him as he worked out his next move, flexing his stiff hands. He stood and stretched, his knees cracking after so many hours kneeling. He walked around the room for a moment, getting his circulation back while his mind worked. 

He moved up and sat down with his back against the bed, his knees drawn up. Harry looked at him, the other three in the room watching them, waiting to see what happened next.

“Hello, Harry,” he said gently. “Would you like a cuddle?”

Harry cried at him and fell into Severus’ arms. Severus stroked his hair and wiped away his tears as Sirius draped a huge towel over his nude godson. Severus kissed the sweaty forehead, right on his scar, the way Harry liked as the other two men stood and stretched.

“Please, Severus, no more. You pull him out. You have him for me,” Harry begged. He was on his side, his head resting against Severus’ knee, cradled by those strong slim arms and legs that he loved so much. Granted, he had to have one leg bent with his foot on the floor and the other bent one lying on the plastic sheet as there was too much resistance for him to close them, but his Severus was here, he was safe. He could beg for mercy now.

“I can’t, love. I promise I would if I could. I can’t get a grip on him, or I would pull him for you. And I swear to you, if I could take your place and do this for you, I would, without a second thought. But, you see, I can’t. He needs you to do this. You’re his carrier, he knows that you can do this for him,” Severus reasoned, feeling Harry grip at his hair with a shaky hand. 

God, Harry looked utterly done in, he was amazed that the sprite was still conscious. Harry was drenched in sweat and he was trembling in pain and exhaustion, tears pouring from his eyes. He helped Harry gulp down water from the glass Remus handed to him. Harry had refused it before, but his Severus was holding the glass now.

“Please, don’t make me push anymore. I’m so tired, and it hurts. Severus, it hurts so much, it’s even worse than the bad things. Please, Severus, it hurts,” Harry complained, his voice a little less raw after fluids.

“I know. I know it does. But it will soon be over, I swear. All you have to do is push him out, that’s all,” Severus replied, relentless. Harry groaned at him.

“This is like when I first came to you and you told me that I had to come to all meals, and I had to try to eat. This is like that, isn’t it? You won’t let me not do it,” Harry rationalised.

“Yes, it is like that. You have to do this, you can’t stop, not now. You’re too close to the finish line.”

“Oh God! Severus!” Harry screamed as another contraction hit him and Severus held him closer, letting Harry tear at his shirt and shriek and curse, rocking him and murmuring soothing words to him. When it was over, Harry sobbed at him.

“I’m scared,” Harry wailed.

“I know, love. I’m going to be honest with you, I am too. The thought of having to watch you in pain for another second terrifies me. But I’ll make you a deal. I’ll be strong if you will.”

Harry sniffed and nodded. “I’m frightened, Severus. Are you sure nothing’s wrong? It’s taking forever.”

“Nothing is wrong, love. It’s just dragging out. Try not to worry, I’m here. Don’t you know that I plan on keeping the both of you forever?”

Harry smiled at him and pulled him in for a tired kiss.

“Would you like more potion, Harry?”

Harry nodded and Severus helped him gulp down three vials, one after the other, and then a whole four glasses of water before the next contraction hit, Severus rocking and soothing him again. Severus reasoned that the potion was weak and he could give Harry up to five at one go if need be. If it wasn’t enough then he could top it up.

“Will you carry on for me, love?”

“I have to, don’t I? He needs me to do this,” Harry replied. “I’ll push.”

“I am so proud of you. Now, Sirius is going to hold you and I’m going to help you get him out,” Severus said, helping Harry back to his knees, though there was now a pillow beneath the bony knees as Severus had noticed that they were bruised.

“No more rubbing my back, it’s annoying me,” Harry said. “Remus can help Sirius and do the cool cloths, those help a bit.”

“All right, Remus will help with the cloths now.”

“Severus, I love you.”

“I love you,” Severus replied, kissing Harry softly before moving back down. Remus moved up to take his place and took over the cloths, Sirius occupied by Harry gripping his hands.

“Take the towel off, it’s hot in here,” Harry asked and Remus pulled it off while Severus helped Harry spread his legs once more, centring himself so he stayed steady.

“Are you ready?” Severus asked.

“I’m ready,” Harry ground out as the pain hit him again.

“Push for me, Harry. Push hard.”

So Harry pushed, and pushed, and pushed. He screamed and cursed, screamed for all the world that he hated Lucius, that no one would take his baby from him.

“Fuck! No way, no no no!” Harry shrieked at half four, the sun just beginning to rise, Harry arching away from the pain, refusing to push again.

“Talk to me! Why do you say no?” Severus asked over the pained wails.

“I can’t push! I can’t do it!”

“Why, Harry? Why can’t you?”

“He’s gonna split me in two! He’s gonna rip me to shreds!” Harry explained in breathless moans, his grip white-knuckled on Sirius’ shirt, the material beginning to split. Harry had moved up to grip his godfather, trying to get away from the feel of the head crowning, and Harry’s head was now on Sirius’ shoulder.

“Harry, give me your hand,” Severus instructed, seeing Harry obey without hesitation. He took the slim hand and brought it down under Harry, brought it down to where the top of the head was now poking out.

“What’s that?” Harry asked, running his shaking fingers over the slick flesh.

“That is his head. See? It’s right there. Now, feel how tight you are around him.” Harry’s fingers touched the tight opening around the head. “You’re not going to be split in two, I swear it, it is a physical impossibility. But you will tear. I promise you that they will be small. We discussed this, remember? Remember we talked about tearing. What did I tell you?”

Harry took a few deep breaths, trying to get his mind to work through the excruciating pain. He entwined his fingers with Severus’ and that seemed to help a little. 

“You told me that if I tore then Poppy had taught you a spell to heal them for me,” Harry replied.

“That is exactly right. You will tear, love, and yes, it will be painful. But I swear to you that I will heal you afterwards,” Severus explained, knowing that Harry would work best with flat out honesty right now.

“Promise?”

“I promise. I can cut you, if you want. Remember we talked about episiotomies? It’ll make it a little easier to get him out. If you want it, I can do it.”

“Remember I told you that you could go fuck yourself before even considering doing that to me?” Harry replied immediately. “No fucking way, no episi thingies. I’d rather tear.”

Severus chuckled. “All right, no cut. But he won’t tear you to shreds or split you in two. Just a few small tears. Come on, Harry, he’s right there, you can touch him now, love. Just keep pushing for me.”

“Okay, I believe you. But I need a rest, just give me a minute,” Harry said, gulping down water from the glass Sirius held for him. Severus glanced at Poppy, checking if it was advisable for Harry to stop and rest so close to the finish. She nodded at him and he chuckled at Harry’s next statement.

“Oh God, how good was that water.”

“Like heaven?” Severus asked and Harry nodded, their fingers still entwined. “All right, Harry. Take the time you need.”

“What time is it?” Harry asked, panting as he tried to regain some strength, enough to push some more. “How long have I been at this?”

“It’s half past four in the morning, pup. You’ve been in labour for twenty eight, nearly twenty nine hours,” Remus supplied and Harry groaned, wishing he hadn’t asked.

“That makes it more than a whole day. How much longer?” he asked, twiddling with Sirius’ hair to distract himself.

“Only as long as it takes you to get him out,” Severus pledged. Harry sighed in exhaustion before he nodded.

Harry pulled his hand back up, let go of his godfathers hair and gripped at Sirius’ shirt, biting down on his pillow again, which he had dragged up with him, as he began to push, half screaming half grunting. Harry shook with the effort of it, shoving his hips down in an attempt to make the head come out faster. Severus supported his perineum, pushing back against his hips, and wiped away blood as he tore. Sirius held him around the ribs, holding him steady. At the end of it, only half the head was out and Harry was gasping.

“Is he out?” Harry asked, craning his head to look at his husband. “Did I do it?”

“Not yet, love, almost. You got half his head out. A little more, Harry.”

“Parenthood better be fucking worth this!” Harry screamed, his head falling onto his pillow, punching Sirius’ chest. The Animagus said nothing, he simply stroked his hair and winced at the impact, Remus smirking at him as he sponged Harry’s arms. “I’m so tired!”

“I know, but you are so close. Push, Harry, push again for me.”

Harry pushed, screaming and grunting again, and Severus watched the small tearing grow, heard Harry’s ear splitting sobs as the head emerged, saw him ram his thin thighs further apart as he shoved his hips down again. Severus pushed against him once more, helping him to force out the child. First the eyes, then the nose and finally the mouth and chin. Harry collapsed against Sirius as the head finally passed, gasping and sobbing.

“GET HIM THE FUCK OUT OF ME!” Harry demanded, flinging his pillow across the room. Sirius shifted so Harry was able to get a better grip on him, Harry twisting his fists in the shoulders of his shirt; Remus placed a gentle hand on the base of Harry’s spine, pressing the cold wet cloth against his sweat-slicked skin, and pushed his damp hair away from his face with the other hand.

“Almost there, Harry,” Severus placated.

“NO! NOW! GET HIM OUT OF ME NOW! ALMOST ISN’T FUCKING GOOD ENOUGH! I WANT HIM OUT NOW! GET HIM OUT! JUST MAKE IT END, GET HIM OUT!”

“Let me check for the cord and clear his airways, and then you can get him out,” Severus bribed, feeling for the cord and finding only neck, clearing the airways.

“You said that you couldn’t pull ‘cause you couldn’t get a grip on him. If I pass his shoulders, will you pull?” Harry asked, panting, rocking his hips to try and alleviate the pressure once he felt Severus’ fingers disappear.

“Yes, if you pass his shoulders I will pull,” Severus agreed. “I’m done, Harry. No cord around his neck, airways clear. This is it, love. He’ll come with one more push, just one more. Push with all you have left, Harry.”

Ah. Harry hadn’t considered that he would actually have to push to pass the shoulders, though he felt very foolish for thinking that they would just miraculously fall out of him. If it was that simple, he wouldn’t have just spent more than a day in labour. The man had to be kidding. All he had left? There was nothing left, absolutely nothing. Severus would make him carry on, but maybe his fathers would save him, maybe they would free him from this torment.

“But I don’t have anything left! Please, Remus, please make it end!” Harry argued, convinced he could go no further, turning his head, looking to his adoptive father with big green tear filled eyes.

“Yes, you do. You can do this. Come on, one last push and we’ll let you sleep. Just give Severus one more great big push and out the baby comes,” Remus urged, sponging his sweaty back and neck.

“No, I can’t push anymore! I’m tired, please, just do it for me!” Harry begged, locking pleading orbs with his godfathers kind blue ones. He had saved the man from Azkaban, he could save him from this. “Please, Sirius, please do it for me!”

Sirius smiled at him. “We know you’re tired, Harry, and if we could let you give up now, we would. But we can’t let you give up and we can’t do this for you, I wish we could. Just one more push, that’s all. You can do this, I know you can. You’re my special boy, you can do this. Just one more big push and it’ll all be over,” Sirius encouraged, kissing the dark hair and rubbing his sides. Harry gripped at his arms as he panted, trying to get his brain to function through the agony and fatigue.

“Only one more, one last big push, that’s it and then it’s over, you promise?” Harry demanded to the three men.

“We promise. Give me one last great big push and he’s out,” Severus confirmed, reaching back and rubbing circles on the soles of Harry’s feet with his thumbs. “Come on, sweetheart, you saved the world, one push is nothing. You can do this, just one push, love. Give it all you’ve got, get him out.”

Harry didn’t think he had anything left, he was so drained. He couldn’t ever remember being so tired. But Severus didn’t lie to him, he promised, he always told him the truth. He must be able to give him one more push, Severus said so. Somewhere deep inside he found a last supply of strength and he used it all to bear down, feeling one hard shoulder and then the other pass, feeling the body being yanked at by Severus, feeling himself opened impossibly, rending agonizingly. Sirius was holding him around ribs, pulling him against Severus’ tugging, and Remus was stroking his back, gripping his hands. The two of them were telling him, over his screams, that this was it, that he was so brave, that he was their special boy, how proud they were of him. And then it was all over. He was out. And Harry was finally released.

Severus watched Harry pant for a few moments before he wrapped his arms around Sirius’ shoulders, buried his head in his neck, gripped Remus’ hand and began to bear down. He watched as first one shoulder and then the other came free, Harry bleeding profusely as he tore further. Severus reached out with shaking hands and began to tug gently, Sirius pulling at Harry to help free the tiny body. Harry wasn’t even pausing now, he was gasping, screaming, swearing, pushing, and giving up all in one go. He pulled as Harry pushed, and finally, the body came free in a great rush of blood and fluid and shrieks. Harry collapsed against Sirius, his parents telling him that they were so proud of him, that he had done so well. Harry was drawing great shuddering breaths, sobbing for all he was worth, breathlessly proclaiming that he had done it, that he was out, that it was over.

Severus lay the bawling child down on the protective sheet that covered the floor and wiped it off of all the blood and fluid and muck that came with childbirth. He cut the cord and looked down. He had to look twice because he couldn’t quite believe what he was seeing. But Poppy was standing over him, smiling, so it must be true.

Harry didn’t care about anything but the fastest way to get himself to a bed. He was sinking into unconsciousness, he could feel it, but a small surprised statement from his husband had him managing to keep his eyes open just a moment longer than they should have been.

“Tell Luna she’s rich. It’s a girl,” Severus announced and his two fathers-in-law looked at him in shock. 

“What?” came Harry’s breathless reply. “No, we’re having a boy. Remus said so. Fable says so. It’s a boy. Dylan James Albus Potter-Snape. I pushed out a boy.”

Severus picked up the now sleepy shivering baby and held her so that Harry could crane round and see her. 

“Oh. It is a girl,” Harry said. His eyelids drooped. “That’s nice.”

Severus wrapped her in a clean soft towel, cradling her close. She stopped crying and looked up at him with big sleepy eyes. They were the lightest blue but Severus could see a green tint to them. She yawned and closed her eyes, drifting off. “Do you want to hold her, Harry?”

“No! You said I could sleep, you swore I could,” Harry groaned. “I’ll hold her later, I swear, just please, you promised I could sleep if I pushed. I know we said him but it’s the same baby. I did my bit, I pushed. Now you let me sleep. You promised, Severus, you swore.”

“All right, sweetheart, okay, you can sleep, we’ll do the rest. Is it all right if Poppy cleans her up and checks her over?” Severus asked.

“Fine, but she doesn’t leave the room with her.”

Severus passed Poppy the now sleeping baby and turned his attention to Harry. He was groaning in pain once more.

“Severus, it hurts again,” Harry complained.

“Just the afterbirth, Harry. No pushing required. I pull for this whole bit.”

In the end, Harry did end up pushing the afterbirth, reasoning that if he pushed it would come out faster. Severus didn’t argue, and didn’t even bat an eyelid when Sirius proclaimed that the bloody mass was absolutely disgusting. He pushed it to one side and set to cleaning Harry up, the sprite already asleep kneeling. He healed the tearing, cast a cleaning charm on his legs and genitals and pulled Harry back against him, having Remus help him pull a pair of briefs onto his exhausted lover. They weren’t Harry’s usual boxers but they would be the only things that would hold the pad in place that Harry needed to wear. He positioned the thick pad between the thin legs, securing it, and had Remus help him pull the nursing bra onto Harry. Together they dressed him in a pair of soft flannel pyjamas and eased him into bed.

When Poppy was done cleaning and checking her, she handed the baby to Sirius and cleaned up the mess while Harry was seen to. By the time Severus and Remus looked around, no one would have known that Harry had just given birth in there, it was clean and ordered.

Severus sat on the bed, stroking back Harry’s hair, telling his sleeping lover how proud he was of him, how much he loved him. Sirius and Remus were cooing over the sleeping baby and dressing her in a little blue baby grow. They wrapped her in a blanket and moved to Severus.

“Here, Severus. Hold your daughter,” Sirius said, helping Severus to take her. Severus looked down at the tiny little girl, tears spilling. He knew he was smiling like a fool, he knew that he was crying in front of one of his childhood enemies but he couldn’t help it. He was a father.

“Is she all right?” he asked Poppy, the witch smiling broadly at him.

“She’s fine. Three pounds, four ounces, tiny little girl. I’ve never seen a newborn so small. But, she is absolutely perfect all the same. She’ll need feeding in a few hours but she’ll sleep for now. Harry put her through the wringer, she’s tired,” Poppy reassured. 

“She is meant to be a girl then?” Severus asked, the tiny fist wrapping around his finger and holding on tight, as if to say ‘you’re mine’. Like carrier like daughter. “It isn’t our eyes playing tricks on us?”

“No, she’s a girl, just like she’s meant to be.”

“This means that Harry is the first hermaphrodite ever to have a girl as his first child. He’s making history again,” Remus said with a smile.

“But they are both all right to sleep for a few hours before Harry has to feed her?” Severus asked, slipping his daughter into the small bassinette someone had moved to stand beside his side of the bed.

“Yes. She’ll let you know when your time is up,” Poppy confirmed.

“You should sleep, Severus. We’ll tell everyone about her,” Sirius said as they clapped Severus on the back and headed for the door.

“Thank you,” Severus called absentmindedly. He was too busy stroking one silky black curl on the tiny little girls head.

He tucked her in and cracked open a window, a light morning breeze making the curtains flutter. He stripped down to his boxers and gazed at the little girl once more. He glanced at the clock. She had finally put in an appearance at five am. 29 hours Harry had been at it, seven of those spent pushing. No wonder Harry had passed out. But the little girl was worth it, and he knew Harry would see it that way.

He eased himself into bed and wrapped his arms around the sprite that immediately curled up against him, despite his exhaustion. 

He was a father. He and Harry were parents.

He fell asleep with a huge smile on his face.

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	3. Chapter Three

Bill cracked his eyes open to find himself encased in warm arms. They were thick and muscular, definitely not Solarin. He looked around to see that everyone in the kitchen was wearing pastel pink, their clothes colours transfigured. He was entwined with Charlie, his hand on his brothers arse. He looked around to find that everyone in the kitchen, with the exception of Draco, was entwined with someone in very intimate positions. He looked around to find Solarin was the only other one awake, and he smirked. Yeah right, no way had she lost her prankster streak. She was perched in the open window, smoking a cigarette and staring out into the day. The sky was a bright blue but there were dark threatening clouds on the horizon, promising further rains. He sniggered. She had changed their hair colours as well, to a bright luminous green and red streaked pattern.

“I would have a go at you for this but it is our own fault. We fell asleep,” Bill grumbled quietly, freeing himself and moving over to the window, changing himself back on the way. He climbed up on the sink and settled himself with her, pulling her back into his arms.

“You been up all night?” he asked his grinning girlfriend.

“I didn’t feel like dropping my barriers while I slept and letting Harry’s pain in. I stayed up. I got bored,” she replied, her smile wide as he nuzzled her neck.

Bill glanced at his parents, finding them asleep. “Give me a puff.”

She took a drag and then joined their lips, transferring smoke from her lungs to his. She had first taught him to do this in Hogwarts. She had been sixteen and had a friend in Diagon Alley that sent them to her. They had been sitting by the lake, secluded by a willow tree and she had taught him the finer art of teenage delinquency.

“When did it go quiet?” he asked, feeling his head spin deliciously.

“Quarter to five. It’s been quiet for about half an hour now. Remus and Sirius are making their way down the stairs,” she replied. “They’ll be a while, they’re knackered.”

“So, do you think that we’ll ever get round to having one?”

“One what, a sleepless night helping someone have a baby?”

“No, a baby of our own! Do you ever think about us reproducing?” Bill asked, taking another puff.

“After those screams, you think I’m ever letting you touch me again? One of them should have remembered silencing charms. Poor Hermione looked ready to pass out. Those screams are like the best contraceptive in the world.” Solarin said, running her hand suggestively along his thigh. He found it reassuring. “I’m kidding. I think about it sometimes. But I don’t think we’re ready for the responsibility yet.”

“Harry’s only sixteen,” Bill argued.

She tilted round to look him in the eye. “Are you saying you want a baby?”

“No, I’m just saying that age isn’t really a factor for us, it never has been. I just wondered if you ever thought about having one,” he explained as she flicked the cigarette butt out of the window.

“Well, in that case, yes, I do think about us having one. I’m talking in like a few years, not now, but yeah, I do think about it. I want children with you. But I’m telling you now, I am so not giving you seven kids like your mum and dad,” she said, settling herself against his chest again.

“I wouldn’t want that many,” he said honestly. She reached up and back, playing with his long hair, his fingertips dancing across her exposed ribs. “When I was growing up, because there were so many of us, my parents never really had time for us all. We knew that they loved us but it was tough. I don’t want our child to go through that.”

“But I don’t want our child to be an only child. I value having a brother,” Solarin replied. “Without him, I wouldn’t have made it to double digits, let alone adulthood.” Bill kissed her neck. It was the closest she had ever come to telling him of her childhood. She had closed the connection and Bill suspected that she was thinking of her own parents. “How about we say two at the least, four at the most?”

“Sounds good to me,” he agreed as Remus and Sirius entered the room, laughing at the sleeping people. They awoke and looked around, some glaring at Solarin and Bill, most laughing and changing themselves back.

“So?” Draco asked.

“It’s all over. Harry had a beautiful baby girl at four forty four this morning,” Remus announced.

The room was silent.

“A girl?” Hermione asked. “He had a girl?”

“Yes, and beautiful she is too. Three pounds, four ounces.”

“How is she a girl?” Ron asked.

“Because she’s special,” Solarin intervened. “Why do you think I turned all your clothes pink?”

“You knew?” Sirius asked.

“As soon as she left Harry’s body I knew. His magic stopped interfering with my magic. That is one happy little girl. And she adores Severus already. She’s very tired and understands that her carrier is tired and will feed her later,” Solarin revealed, Sirius and Remus nodding at her, permanent smiles fixed on their faces.

“So, tell us of her,” Albus encouraged while the rest of the room processed the information.

“Well, she is absolutely tiny, you can literally sit her in the palm of your hand,” Sirius gushed. “Ten fingers, ten toes. Black hair, all soft curls. And we think her eyes will turn green, they’re already a little blue-green. She’s pale and so cute.”

“Hey, this means that Luna is the only one who won anything,” Fred said with a bemused smile. “She was the only one who bet that the baby would be a girl. Everyone else said ‘he’ or ‘him’. Luna wins.”

They paid up and Luna became a very rich witch, though her smile was oddly calm in the face of so much gold.

“How did you know, Luna?” Neville asked the blonde Ravenclaw.

“It’s Harry. If it is unlikely, unfortunate or impossible, it will happen to him,” she said dreamily.

They all smiled and began talking about the baby, Molly making them something to eat and Arthur popping open a few bottles of champagne. Solarin declined the beverage, sipping orange juice with Hermione, claiming that ingesting alcohol made her control slip. Sirius shuddered as she said it.

Everyone found that they were immensely relieved that it was all over.

“Hey Draco, you’re a big brother now,” Charlie reminded the blonde.

“I don’t think Harry wants to acknowledge the Malfoy input in his daughter,” Draco said sadly, reminding them all of how Harry had screamed of what a bastard Lucius was.

“You’re Severus’ godson, right?” Charlie asked, Draco nodding. “Well, she’s Severus’ daughter. You’re her god big brother.”

Draco beamed at him and held one end of Charlie’s napkin, swinging it between them.

The morning passed in a haze of toasts and celebrations, all of them charging their glasses and toasting Harry and Severus’ daughter finally making an appearance.

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Severus woke to Solarin running her hand over his hair.

“Severus, you need to wake up,” she said softly.

“Why? What time is it?” he asked, yawning, disentangling himself from Harry and sitting up.

“It’s a little after one in the afternoon and the baby is whimpering. I think she’s hungry.”

Severus yawned and slipped into the t-shirt and sweatpants she handed him before picking up the tiny girl. She looked up at him with big unfocussed eyes, falling silent.

“Do you want to hold her?” he asked, watching her face light up. She held her arms out and he helped her hold the minuscule girl, the augur cooing at her how beautiful she was. Solarin continued to talk to her and play with her teeny reaching hands as Severus padded to the bathroom to relieve his overfull bladder. He returned and sat down next to Harry.

He ran gentle fingers through the sleep tousled hair and green eyes opened.

“Hi,” Harry mumbled.

“Welcome back,” Severus replied with a smile.

“What happened?” Harry asked, wincing as he shifted in the bed.

“Well, you did beautifully delivering a perfect baby girl and then you went to sleep, just like I promised. We cleaned you and the room up and put you to bed.”

“So I didn’t dream it? I really had a girl?”

“You really had a girl.”

“What time is it?”

“A little after one pm.”

“Why are you waking me?”

“You need to take some potions and eat something. You need to try and feed the baby as well, love,” Severus replied and smiled as Harry nodded. He helped Harry sit up.

“I thought you promised to heal me if I tore?” Harry asked, his face a mask of pain.

“I did heal you,” Severus replied.

“Then why does it still hurt so much down there?”

“Harry, you’ve just passed a baby through it. It’s bound to be sore. I promise it will get better.”

“Severus, I need the bathroom. I’m not sure my legs will get me there,” Harry said quietly, blushing slightly.

“It’s all right, I’ll help you,” Severus agreed, rubbing his hand comfortingly along the slim back.

“Where’s the baby?” Harry asked as Severus eased him from the warm bedding.

“Solarin is holding her,” Severus said, motioning to his sister as he helped Harry stand. She smiled at Harry and he smiled back, staring at the bundle in her arms. It wasn’t much of a smile, Severus noticed, as if his lover was just doing it for show. If Solarin noticed, she said nothing, fussing at the baby once more.

Severus half carried Harry to the bathroom, his shaky legs making it difficult for him to even stand, and Harry proclaimed that it was only true love that would allow him to have Severus help him on the toilet. Severus smiled at him and kept telling him how proud he was of him, how much he loved him as he helped Harry change the blood soaked pad between his legs.

He guided Harry back to bed and helped him prop himself up on a mountain of pillows. Harry began to cry as Solarin moved forwards to hand him the baby. Severus gathered him into his arms and shook his head at Solarin. She moved to rock with the child, standing by the window.

“What’s wrong, Harry? Tell me, love,” Severus said as he held him through his tears.

“What if she knows?” Harry said.

“What if who knows what?”

“The baby. What if she knows I didn’t want her in the beginning? What if she knows I hated her when he told me about her? That I hated her because she was the reason he did that to me? What if she knows that I was expecting her to be a boy?” Harry whimpered.

Severus forced Harry to look at him and wiped away his tears. 

“Harry, do you love her now she’s here? Do you want her?” Severus asked.

“I…I don’t know.” Harry seemed to collapse in on himself as sobs wracked his thin frame. Severus was struck dumb as he let Harry try and burrow into his chest, stroking his hair absentmindedly as he and Solarin looked at each other in shock. He had thought that Harry would adore the baby once it arrived. But this sudden uncertainty had him dazed and troubled. Was Harry just uncertain of this new situation? Was it just his hormones fluctuating again? Or was it more, would it end up as Harry rejecting the child? Solarin was watching the scene, trying to calm the now wailing baby. Harry was falling apart, his dreams were shattering and their child was screaming in hunger. He couldn’t deal with them all at once. He put his own fear of losing his dream to the side, there was nothing he could do about it.

Severus was torn between which problem to address first, Harry, or the baby. He decided that the baby needed feeding more than anything else, and he wasn’t quite sure what to say to his lover to help.

“Harry, listen to me,” Severus urged. “The baby needs feeding. I want you to try feeding her.”

“No, I don’t want to,” Harry refused, shaking his head.

“Harry, it’s all right for you to feel uncertain of whether you want her or not. After all that has happened, I’m not surprised you feel conflicted. But right now, it doesn’t matter if you want her or not, there is time for you to make up your mind. If you feed her it might help you decide,” Severus offered, watching Harry shake his head as he curled against his chest.

“I don’t want to try, I don’t want to hold her.”

Severus had absolutely no idea what to do. In their whole relationship, from the moment he rescued Harry, the Gryffindor had never refused to do anything he had told him to do. He had no idea what to say, how to make this better. He briefly considered using the modes of persuasion he used as a teacher: intimidation and fear. But Harry had never responded well to Scary Professor Snape, as he had dubbed it.

He had no clue on how to handle this, so he did the one thing he had always done when he was this unsure: he looked to his sister to guide him. She motioned him over and passed him the baby. She went to Harry and took Severus’ place.

“Harry, look at me,” Solarin said, holding him by the shoulders. His crying had slowed but he was still shaking with the force of it. He wouldn’t look at her, he just continued to gaze down at the patterned comforter. “Harry James Potter-Snape, you will look at me when I am speaking to you!” she ordered.

Harry looked up in surprise of her tone, his crying halted by the shock of it. Her tone had been angry, harsh and unforgiving. He had never thought that she could sound so much like Scary Professor Snape in all his wildest imaginings. Her tone had been frosty but her eyes were warm and reassuring. Severus was watching them, the screaming baby in his arms.

“Harry, I’m sorry to have used that voice with you but I need you to listen. We will let you have your uncertainty, we will not pressure you into making a decision. But you must feed her. We have no other way of doing it. You have to feed her, there is no other way,” Solarin explained. “Once you have fed her, I will take her to Molly and we will care for her while you decide if that is what you want. But you must feed her.”

Harry looked from her unwavering gaze to Severus’. He felt his stomach twist at the thought of actually holding her, of doing anything for her. But he knew that she needed him to do this, if nothing else. They had neither purchased nor prepared any bottles, and baby formula could not be conjured by magic. They hadn’t even purchased a breast pump. Once his milk had come in they had all agreed that him breast feeding was the best way forward, Harry included. It could not be given any other way than from him directly. Her shrieks were piercing, she sounded in real pain. 

Harry considered it. She had let him be for hours, the least he could do was to feed her, if only as a thank you for the few hours she had allowed him to sleep.

“Fine, I’ll feed her,” Harry croaked, his voice hoarse from crying.

Solarin nodded and gave up her position on the bed. Harry started to move away when Severus brought the child to him but the pain in his body and his own self reasoning made him stop. He kept his eyes fixed on Severus’ face as the child was placed in his arms. He couldn’t look at her for fear of what he might see. He found himself feeling incredibly idiotic. How foolish was it that he couldn’t even look at his own child?

His top was unbuttoned, his left breast released from the nursing bra and still he kept his eyes fixed on Severus. The man looked worried. His arms were manipulated and his husband’s hand gentle as he touched his chest. There was a sudden silence as she latched on. He looked at Solarin. She looked worried as well, though not as much as his lover, and he found himself hoping she wasn’t glancing his mind.

“What hurts?” Severus asked him as he winced.

“Inside me. It feels like cramps,” Harry answered, barely above a whisper.

“They are cramps. Nursing is causing your uterus to contract back to its normal size.”

“Oh.”

Harry turned and stared out of the window, keeping his mouth closed as the baby was taken from him. He felt the gentle rocking of the bed as Severus winded her, and then she was placed to his other breast. He refused to look. He just couldn’t. The feeding of his daughter seemed to stretch on for hours, but the clock he could see out of the corner of his eye told him that the whole process barely lasted ten minutes. 

When it was over, Severus refastened the cups of his bra and buttoned up his top before taking the silent child from him. He felt lost without her warm slight weight in his arms but said nothing. It was better this way, better that she didn’t get attached to her carrier.

“Do you want me to take her away, Harry?” Solarin asked him. He shook his head and she nodded at him.

He accepted his food from Solarin and kept his eyes on his plate as Severus changed the little girls nappy. Solarin removed the empty tray from his lap just as Severus finished rocking the baby back to sleep. He declined watching as Severus tucked her back into the bassinet, focussing instead on the birds building a nest in the tree just outside the window.

Severus turned to his sister, casting a worried glance at his husband. 

“Do not tell anyone of this. It may just be hormones. Do not worry them unnecessarily,” Severus advised and she nodded. She cast a final look at Harry before leaving the room, leaving the three of them alone. Severus sat down beside Harry, wondering what to do.

“You need to take your potions, love,” Severus said gently and Harry nodded.

The sprite gulped them down without a single word and slid down in the bed, rolling onto his side.

“I’m tired,” Harry mumbled, his eyes wide as they stared out into the room.

“Do you want me to stay with you while you sleep or will you be all right if I go and take a shower?” Severus asked, stroking his hand along the slim shoulder. He knew Harry was lying to him, but he ignored it. If Harry wanted to be alone, he would leave him be. At least until he figured out how to handle this new development.

“I’ll be fine. The baby is asleep, right?”

“Yes.”

“Then I’ll be fine.”

Severus hesitated. “Harry…”

“I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

Harry’s voice was bland, unemotional. Severus decided that he would let Harry have his moment.

“All right, later then, when you feel more ready. I’m going for a shower and then for something to eat. I’ll be about an hour. She shouldn’t wake up.”

“Fine.”

Severus kissed his temple and gathered fresh clothes before leaving the room, Harry lying lifeless in the bed, his back to the basket containing his child.

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Harry lay there, thinking things over. He felt like such a coward. He was scared to look at his own child. When she had finally left his body, he had been too tired and in too much pain to actually look at her, just a quick glance between her legs to verify what Severus had told him. But to actually look at her terrified him. One question plagued him: what if?

What if she looked like Lucius? What if all he could see in her was his rapist? What if he couldn’t bear to look at her if she looked that way? What if he couldn’t want her?

Every time he looked at Draco, the blond hair would remind him of what Lucius had done to him. Over the past few months he had come to associate Draco with his salvation more than with his father. But it was still there, that split second moment when he would remember.

He could hear the shower running and wondered what Severus would think of to reassure him if he knew. Why hadn’t he told him? Harry didn’t know why. There was nothing he had really kept from Severus. There were a few details he had skimmed over but he hadn’t hidden anything from him since his rescue.

He realized he was afraid of what Severus would think of him. What kind of parent was he starting out as if he couldn’t even look at his baby? They had spent months preparing to become parents and Harry had seen how much Severus had been looking forward to it. If he couldn’t want the child, Severus would let him give her away. But the man would be crushed.

He knew he had to look at her, his need to know outweighing his fear. It took him a few minutes to accomplish it but he rolled over to Severus’ side of the bed. He took a few deep breaths and let himself glimpse into the basket.

Severus had been wrong, she was awake. Maybe she had been playing a trick on him or something, maybe she had only slept for a minute or two. Or maybe she knew that her carrier was watching her. He didn’t know but he wished she was asleep. She was staring up at the ceiling with unfocussed eyes. Somehow, Harry had thought that looking at her would have been easier if she was asleep. He reached out and pulled the basket a little closer, her head turning at the noise of the stand being pulled across the wooden floor, so he could get a better peek at her. He lay there on his side, staring at the tiny girl.

She was very small; from head to toes she was barely the size of a bag of flour. Harry pondered on why she hadn’t felt that small coming out. She was skinny like he was, but she had that soft plumpness kind of skinny that made her look all squishy and huggable. She had a slight cone head, but he knew that she had gotten that from the pressure of birth. He knew it would fade. She had dark hair that formed into short fuzzy curls. That came from him and he felt his pounding heart slow at the sight. He knew that he definitely wouldn’t have taken it well if his child had been blonde. 

Her eyes were a cross between blue and green, leaning more towards green. He reached out and grabbed his book from Severus’ bedside table where he had left it. He flicked through and found that most fair-skinned babies were born with blue eyes, and that they changed to their natural colour within few weeks of birth. He slipped the book back to its place. They could change, they could be green, like his. She could have inherited his mothers eyes. It looked likely that they would go green and it soothed him. He would not have Lucius’ eyes staring up at him. He clung to that hope.

She had tiny little hands and feet, and a little round belly. She was so small that someone had been forced to roll back the sleeves of her blue baby grow. He rolled back to his side of the bed and retrieved his wand, gasping at the pain of moving. He propped himself up on one elbow and summoned a fresh baby grow. He resized it to fit her. Why someone else hadn’t done so with the first was beyond him. Maybe they had been waiting for him to take charge. While he was at it, he changed the colour of the garment from blue to a soft powdery pink. He was wary of doing any spells on the one she was wearing. He just hoped that he could figure out how to change her, she looked so fragile. But, he reasoned she had survived birth so she couldn’t be as breakable as she looked. It didn’t stop him feeling that she should be treated the same way Severus treated him, like spun glass. He placed his wand on top of his book and looked at her again before making his decision on what to do next.

As far as he could tell, the only thing that could have come from Lucius was her paleness. She seemed to glow in the afternoon light she was so fair skinned. To him, she vaguely resembled Solarin, with her lily white skin and dark hair, and he found it comforting. His daughter was not blood related to her aunt, but she did kind of look like her. It gave him a sense of calm that she remind him of such a good woman.

He sat up slowly and eased himself into a better position. He reached out and carefully picked her up, holding her just the way the book and Severus had told him to before she was born. Support her head, support her body. Don’t drop her. They were easy enough to remember, even if his hands did shake with nerves as he did it. She was so light, and the skin on the back of her neck and head was so soft. He laid her down on the bed and propped himself up on some pillows. He picked her up again and laid her on his thighs so she was facing him, his knees drawn up. She was kind of sitting on his cramping stomach but Harry felt comforted by her being so close to her former home. 

He slowly opened the poppers and eased her arms out of the loose one piece. He slipped his hand under her nappy covered bottom to lift her body, allowing him to slip it off her legs. She lay there in nothing but a nappy, trying to focus on him. Damn, she had his knobbly knees. Poor thing. Her toes were not even as big as his pinkie nail. She kicked him as he ran his fingertips over the velvety skin of her feet, but she didn‘t voice a complaint. It was as if she knew that he needed to examine her. He put the new baby grow on her the same way he had taken the other one off, but in reverse. First the feet, then the legs, lifting her squishy rear end to pull the soft fabric up to cover her back. He carefully eased one arm into its sleeve and then the other, finding the second one a little more difficult and required three attempts to actually manage it. He fastened the poppers and smiled down at her. 

She was such a placid little girl. She had stayed silent through that whole long process. He was sure that Severus or someone else in the house would have been much faster at changing her than he had been but it had been worth it. She looked more like a proper girl now, instead of that genderless look she had in the blue. He tickled his fingers over her tummy, looking at her little nose. He examined her tiny ears, her rosebud mouth, her fingers.

She was looking up at him, her eyes unfocussed. He knew from the book that he would appear fuzzy to her at this distance but he knew she would be able to smell that it was him. He didn’t know how, but the book had told him that she would. He raised his knees a little higher, bringing her closer. It appeared that she could actually see him now, and her eyes locked with his. He took in a deep breath before speaking.

“I don’t know what you’re expecting from me. I’m only sixteen, barely old enough to be your carrier. I’m not even a fully qualified wizard yet. I’m not even legal. I never planned on you. You were not my choice, you were his. I hated you in the beginning, when you were the reason he caused me so much pain and humiliation. And then I wasn’t sure if I even wanted to keep you after you arrived.” 

He stroked the soft black curls, so black they almost shone blue. They seemed to be more tame than his own rats nest. Maybe she wouldn’t hate her hair when she got older the way he had hated his for years. 

“But I don’t hate you now. I don’t know if you already know this but I want to tell you anyway. You need to understand why I was afraid. I’m sorry that I didn’t want to hold you, that I couldn’t look at you. I was afraid that you would look like him. I love you, I have from the moment I realized that you must have still been with me because you were special. You are special. But I couldn’t have raised you if you looked like him.” 

He let her grip his fingers. Her tiny fists held on so tight. She let out a little caw and he smiled at her. She sounded like a happy little crow. 

“But you don’t look like him, you look like me. I’m sorry about the hair but you can blame that on your grandpa James, it’s his fault. And the knees, I’m sure you can blame those on him as well. I love you, and I’m sorry that we didn’t get off to the best start. I promise I’ll try harder. I promise that I’ll do my best.”

She yawned and blinked sleepily at him. He maneuvered her to lie on her front on his chest, her ear pressed against him right above his heart, and slid down the bed so they were lying together. Her toes barely reached his navel. She snuggled against him and he pulled up the comforters, wrapping her up. The weather had suddenly turned sour and it was getting cold in the room. Someone had left a window open. 

“I’m sorry you don’t have a name yet. We thought you were going to be a boy. See, you’re showing us how special you are already just with your gender. No one like me has ever had a girl as their first child. You are so exceptional, so special, that you made history as you took your first breath.” He ran his hand along her back as she fell asleep, his other hand cradling her bottom. “I’m your carrier and you’re mine. You’re my baby, and I’m never giving you up.”

He kissed the top of her head as Severus re-entered the room. The man paused in the doorway and stared at the two of them on the bed, cuddled up together under the blankets, Harry stroking her back like she was the most important thing in the world to him.

Severus was stunned. He had left Harry not even able to look at the child, and there he was, holding her close, gazing at her with wonder on his face. He didn’t quite understand what the hell had happened. He had only been gone an hour.

“Harry? Was she crying? I can take her, if you want,” Severus said cautiously as he moved forwards slowly and sat on the bed beside the two of them.

“No, she was just lying there, staring up at the ceiling,” Harry replied, playing with her dark curls. “I’m fine with her, we’re having cuddles.”

“I don’t understand,” Severus said, careful not to bring up Harry’s rejection of holding her but he was mystified by this change. He waited for Harry to answer him. His husband seemed to be in more of a mood to talk to him now.

“I was afraid,” Harry admitted in a whisper, looking at Severus. “I was afraid that she’d look like him. And if she looked like him I couldn’t have raised her. I love her more than I ever thought I could, but I couldn’t have raised her if she looked like Lucius.”

“I understand. And what do you think of her now?” Severus asked gently.

“She looks like me. All she got from him is her paleness. I think her eyes will turn green, don’t you think so?” Harry asked as he ran a fingertip over one impossibly small fist, over the slope of her nose. She snuffled in her sleep.

“We all imagine green, those of us who have seen her. We doubt they will turn blue, we are very sure they will be green like yours,” Severus confirmed, settling himself more comfortably in his seat, kicking off his slippers.

“I can’t handle it if her eyes turn blue. It’s good that they’ll probably turn green. Green like my mothers. Will she get cold with that draft from the window?”

“I shouldn’t think so while she is tucked up with you like this. I can close it if you wish.”

“No, it’s okay. If she’s fine where she is then it can stay open.” Harry looked at Severus. “Why don’t you come and cuddle with us?”

Severus smiled and slipped into the warm bedding with them, propping himself up on one elbow. He ran his fingers over the dark downy curls.

“She might end up with proper curls instead of it just being wild like mine. But she has got my knobbly knees. She probably won’t thank me for that later. I think she looks a bit like Solarin, though. They‘re both pale with dark hair. And Solarin is a good woman, and a good witch. It makes me feel better that she kind of looks like her,” Harry said, tilting his head to peer at his sleeping child.

“She does vaguely resemble her. Strange as they’re not actually blood related.” Severus paused and lifted his hand to run his fingers through Harry’s hair. “Tell me, love. Do you want her?”

Harry reached out and slipped his hand around the back of Severus’ neck, pulling him in for a sweet kiss, his other hand keeping the newborn steady. “I want her. I can let myself really want her now I know she looks like me and not him. I’ve wanted her ever since I realized how special she must be. And she is special. She was meant to be a boy. She made history,” Harry confirmed.

Severus chuckled and kissed Harry once more. 

“She’s beautiful, isn’t she?” Harry asked, running his fingers over her little feet, his hand still cradling her squashy backside. She kicked in her sleep at his gentle touch. She would probably end up being very ticklish.

“Absolutely gorgeous,” Severus agreed, smiling at the two of them, carrier and daughter.

“I managed to change her into a new baby grow. I wanted her in a pink one that fit. I changed her all by myself,” Harry revealed proudly.

“All by yourself? I am very proud of you. It is rather impressive that you managed to do it without assistance your very first try,” Severus praised and Harry beamed at him. Harry contemplated the tiny newborn for a moment.

“She doesn’t have a name. We never thought of any girls names.”

“We could still call her Dylan, if you like. It would be acceptable as a girls name.”

Harry considered the tiny being once more before shaking his head. “She doesn’t look like a Dylan. It’s nice as a girls name but it’s not hers. It doesn’t fit. She needs a name though.”

“Well, we shall have to decide on one for her. There’s no real rush, we’ll find one.” Severus wasn’t quite sure if he wanted to ask his next question, but it had to be asked. “Harry, do you still want me to be her father, to help you raise her?” he asked quietly, his gaze flickering between Harry and the neonate.

Harry looked at him like he was mad. “You’re nuts. Of course I do. You’re her father, her daddy. We’ve been talking to her for months. She already knows you’re her daddy. Little girls need their daddies,” Harry reassured firmly.

Severus leaned in and kissed him, the kiss becoming heated fast. Severus wanted to hold Harry and show him just how much his words meant to him. But he restrained himself. Harry still had their daughter on his chest and was still sore. It would be a few weeks, if not months, before Harry was ready to be shown how much Severus adored those words.

He felt himself relax, a silly smile taking up permanent residence on his face. The two of them settled down to discuss possible names for their daughter, watching her sleep.

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Charlie watched Draco attempting to make dinner and tried not to laugh. Solarin had taken it upon herself to teach Draco all the things he would need to know to survive. The Daily Prophet four days ago, delivered the morning after Harry had his baby, had informed them all that Lucius had publicly disowned his son. The public line was that Lucius was disowning him for abandoning his family responsibilities, that he had gone against Lucius’ wishes and abandoned his arranged marriage to Pansy, but they all knew better. Lucius was punishing his son for helping Harry escape.

They had wondered why Lucius hadn’t done it sooner, and what was the point of doing it if he had no other male heir, but Draco’s ashen face and threatening tears had made them drop the subject. Solarin had appointed herself his mentor. Without his inheritance or family name he would have to get along just like any other wizard. What had disturbed Draco the most was that he no longer had a name, his father had stripped him of it. Legally, he could never claim himself to be Draco Lucius Malfoy again. He needed a complete new name. His father had taken everything from him, and, legally, he was allowed to. By Wizarding Law, Draco had abandoned any right to his inheritance, his family, his name and anything else owed to him as soon as he had gone against his father. As soon as he had gone against Lord Malfoy, Lord Malfoy had legally been able to take everything his son had and cast him aside. There was no legal standing against it. It was Pureblood bigotry at its strongest, and it had seeped into modern Wizarding Law. Molly had shocked everyone by proclaiming Lucius to be a sadistic pathetic son of a bitch. Their shock subsided when they realized that her out of character language had made Draco laugh.

Arthur had explained to him that, as he was sixteen and still a minor in the Wizarding World until August, he could choose another family name, that he could choose his own relatives now. It had slightly comforted Draco and he had set about claiming himself as a Lupin-Black. It had made Sirius smile that now he was a father to two teenage sons. He and Remus were thrilled. Draco was going to choose a new first name for himself as well, but he hadn’t found one he liked yet, so he was allowing everyone to continue calling him Draco for the time being. He considered it a way to make a fresh start with his life, and tried not to dwell on the fact that he had nothing left.

Draco had taken to Solarin’s teachings like a duck to water. He craved being useful, to fit in with his family. He was slowly learning how to get by without house elves to do everything for him. And that included learning how to cook.

“Right, you chop this. It can be roughly chopped so don’t worry about how it looks. Just cut it up like I showed you when we made lunch,” Solarin instructed, handing Draco an onion. Charlie marvelled at the way she managed to do things, like hand him the vegetable, and not touch him, not even a brush of fingers. He wasn’t sure he would have done it as smoothly as she had.

Draco examined it for a few moments before beginning to peel off the brown skin. Solarin moved away to put the pastry casings into the oven to blind bake.

Charlie didn’t know if Draco could sense that he was watching him, but he knew it didn’t matter. He couldn’t have Draco, so what was the point? He had been taken aside by Bill and told of Draco’s inability to handle physical contact, that there was something wrong with him. Until they could make whatever that was better, Charlie had no chance of being with the blond, no matter how much he wanted to be. 

But it didn’t stop him falling for him. It wasn’t the way he looked, it was what was inside. If asked, Charlie would not have been able to tell what colour Draco’s eyes were, or how tall he was, or what his smile looked like. But he could divulge that Draco loved to joke, that he liked oranges, that he was good at potions. He could disclose that Draco’s favourite colour was purple, not green as everyone assumed, that he had a wickedly dry sense of humour, that Sirius was his favourite person to annoy.

For Charlie, Draco was not about the physical. For him, he was falling for Draco’s soul, for his heart, for his badly hidden protectiveness of his new family. Charlie found himself dreaming of Draco after only a few days of being around the blond. They were dreams that had him filled with longing. They weren’t sexual, but they were just as embarrassing. In his dreams, he and Draco would sit curled up together, talking about nothing in particular. He found himself wishing he could hold Draco for real, but he knew it would not happen.

His feelings didn’t stop him from admiring the way Draco’s arse looked in his tight black jeans. He was, after all, still male. He was going to look. And he found the sight of Draco very appealing.

He stopped staring at Draco as the door opened, revealing a shaky but smiling Harry supported by Severus. Sirius trailed in behind them, carrying the baby. She had yet to be given a name.

“Hello,” Solarin said. “Dinner will be ready in a bit.”

“What are we having?” Harry asked, taking a seat and retrieving his daughter from his godfather.

“Cheese and onion quiche with baked potatoes and salad. Draco is doing the onion,” Solarin said, hinting at how well Draco was doing.

“Sounds good. Can’t wait,” Harry said, seemingly genuine. He had been the taster for some of Draco’s attempts at cooking, and they were not pretty. When the two of them had cooked together back at Spinners End, whatever Draco had been given to prepare either came out burnt or raw, and had to be saved by Harry. He hoped Solarin would be able to salvage this meal.

“Yeah. Wonder if it’ll be better than my mums,” said Charlie, offering his own brand of praise for Draco’s efforts. He turned to look at the shyly smiling blond. “Draco’s doing really well with the…Draco!”

Charlie sprung up and rushed to the flaxen haired young man, the Slytherin looking at him in fear as he got closer to touching him. Solarin rushed forwards as well.

Draco’s hand was gushing blood. He had sliced clean through the skin and blood vessels. 

Charlie reached him first. “I’m sorry, but I have to touch you,” he said as he took Draco’s hand and led him to the sink, holding the bleeding appendage under a stream of cold water.

“I…I…” Draco stuttered, looking at his hand in shock as Solarin began to heal it. Charlie was touching him, but his skin wasn’t crawling.

“Draco, why didn’t you see to it as soon as you cut yourself?” Severus asked, clearing up the now bloody half chopped onion. Everyone was looking at him. Sirius was bandaging up the healing wound. Charlie was hovering near him. Solarin was rescuing pastry from almost being burnt. Remus had come in and he was watching with parental concern. Harry was watching him, the baby in his arms squirming in her sleep at the tension in her carriers frame.

“I…I didn’t…I didn’t feel…” Draco stammered.

“You didn’t feel it?” Harry asked, trying to relax so his daughter would calm but his voice was shaking.

“No. I don’t feel anything.”

They were looking really worried. Had he said the wrong thing? He looked down and reached his undamaged hand out, slipping it into Charlie’s. The redhead looked at him in surprise but he ignored it. He knew he was touching him, that someone was touching his skin, but he couldn’t feel it.

“Draco, how does it feel to be holding Charlie’s hand?” Solarin asked him, the preparation of dinner abandoned.

“I can’t feel it,” Draco answered, staring at his hand joined with Charlie’s. He found, now his shock had worn off, that he wasn’t really panicking. He actually found this better than the crawling of his skin when someone had touched him before. They all looked worried, but he didn’t suffer any fear at all.

“Draco, let go of his hand,” Solarin urged gently, moving towards him. He glanced down and let go. “Okay, Draco, I want you to close your eyes. I’m going to touch you and I want you to tell me if you can feel it. Is that all right?”

He could feel himself nodding. He closed his eyes.

Severus watched as Solarin approached his godson. Draco unable to feel anything was a bad sign. It was clear that whatever was wrong with Draco was getting worse. They needed answers they had no way of finding.

Solarin ran her fingers over Draco’s back. “Can you feel that?” she asked and Draco shook his head. “How about that?” she asked as she stroked his hair. Another shake of the head. “This?” she questioned as she flicked his arm.

“Nothing, but I can hear you tapping something,” Draco said. He opened his eyes and gazed down at the red marks her flicking had left on his pale skin. “I can’t feel them,” he said interestedly.

Solarin looked at Severus. 

“Draco, I need to ask you some things and I need you to be very honest in your answers,” Solarin ordered, making him sit down at the table and sitting opposite him. He nodded.

“We’ve established that you can’t feel your skin, but how about other things? Can you still tell if you’re hungry, if you need the bathroom?”

“Yes, I can still feel those.”

“Do you feel ill at all?” she asked, feeling his forehead for a fever and finding none.

“No. I just can’t feel my skin.”

“How long have you had this lack of sensation?”

“I don’t know. It wasn’t there this morning, or when we were making lunch. I accidentally burnt my hand, remember? I felt that.”

She peered at him for a moment. “So, it’s new. That’s reassuring. And you’re not about to have any embarrassing accidents on us right now, so that’s a plus.” She heaved a sigh. “Well, I don’t think that you’re in any immediate danger. But no more helping in the kitchen. It’s too dangerous if you can’t feel cutting yourself,” Solarin proclaimed. 

“What do you think it is?” Draco asked.

“I think this is your symptoms getting worse,” she replied honestly.

“Can you make it stop?”

“Not yet. This whole thing is like a jigsaw puzzle. We have bunch of pieces and we’re trying to put them together, but a few pieces are missing, so it makes it harder for us. But we will put it together, I promise. We just need a little more time. Can you hold on for a little longer?”

“I can wait. It feels better being numb than having my skin crawling,” Draco agreed and she smiled slightly at him, smoothing his hair. Charlie admired how motherly she had become towards her student.

She glanced around the room. “Someone will need to start the shower off for him. If he can’t feel it then he could scald himself. I’m also wary of him spending too much time alone. Not being able to feel pain makes it dangerous. And I’m not sure which way these symptoms will go. They could get worse, or they could get better,” she theorized.

“I’ll take care of him,” Charlie said.

“Charlie…” Solarin began, but he interrupted her.

“He’s my friend. I’ll take care of my friend,” Charlie said firmly.

“You don’t have to, if you don’t want,” Draco chipped in.

“I want to,” Charlie replied, leaving no room for argument. Draco smiled at him and Charlie knew that it was worth it.

They all settled down after that, and dinner was delicious. That Draco kept earning worried glances went uncommented, that he was getting worse was not spoken of. They kept the conversation light, mostly suggestions for the baby’s name. Harry was getting really good at eating one handed, as long as someone cut it up for him, like Solarin had done before even sending his serving to the table.

Charlie peered down, his fork halfway to his mouth, as Draco’s hand slipped into his. He could touch him, Charlie could touch Draco. Even if Draco couldn’t feel it, he ran circles on the back of his hand.

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Charlie rolled over in his sleep and sat bolt upright as his door opened. He had opted to stay at Grimmauld Place for the time being, thinking it better to be near his friend right now, and had taken a room near Draco’s.

Said blond was standing uncertainly in his doorway.

“Draco? What’s wrong?”

“I…I’m scared,” came Draco’s broken whisper. “I can’t sleep.”

“Come in.”

Draco padded towards the bed and Charlie reached out a hand. Draco took it and allowed Charlie to pull him into the bed. The two of them lay facing each other, enough space for another person between them.

“I know you can’t feel anything, but it might help if you’re not alone,” Charlie said, raising Draco’s hand where he could see it before entwining their fingers, laying it on the pillow between their heads. “What are you scared of?”

“What if I’m the reason?”

“Reason for what?”

Draco looked at him. Charlie could feel him shaking. “The reason my father did those things to Harry. What if it’s something wrong with me that made him do that?”

“Draco, even if your father does know why you’re like this, it is in no way your fault that your father did those things to Harry. Your father did them for his own twisted reasons. It is not your fault,” Charlie assured.

“You promise?” Draco asked.

“I promise.”

They were silent for a while until Draco asked another question. “Do you think Solarin really will be able to fix me?”

“Well, Bill seems to think so, but he’s biased,” Charlie replied jokingly. He considered it. “I think she will. I’m going by Sirius’ reaction. Sirius and Solarin don’t get along too well but he trusts her to fix this. If he trusts that she can make it better, then she probably can.”

Draco nodded and uncertainty filled his face once more.

“Can I stay here with you tonight? I mean, you’re my friend and you said you’d take care of me and it might help if I wasn’t alone. If it’s not okay, I can go back to my own room,” Draco asked timidly.

“You can stay here. It’s okay.” Charlie lay there, watching the blond. “Can you feel if you’re cold?”

“No. I feel numb. I mean, I can tell if I’m hungry, or if I need the bathroom, and I know if I feel faint or dizzy, things like that. But I’m numb on the outside,” Draco revealed. “Why do you ask?”

“Because your hand is freezing,” Charlie replied. 

“If I can’t tell, how do I get warm?”

Charlie considered it. His solution had a slight flaw to it. He would have to touch Draco, and to do that he felt it only right to tell Draco how he felt. He knew what Bill had told him, but Draco was different now. Draco didn’t seem to be having any trouble with physical contact.

“Draco, I need to tell you something,” Charlie admitted.

“You can tell me anything,” Draco said. “We’re friends.”

“Draco, I…I want…” Charlie huffed in frustration of himself. Draco’s hand reached out and moved through his hair the same way Solarin had done to Draco earlier. “I want to be more than your friend.”

Draco didn’t say anything, and his hand came to lay on the mattress between them. 

“I know that it’s not an option right now, not until you’re better. I know that if I made any moves it wouldn’t feel right for you. But I thought you should know. If you want to go back to your own room now, and if you want someone else to take care of you, I’ll understand,” Charlie offered.

“Charlie, I…” Draco didn’t seem to be having much more luck than he had with this topic. “I don’t feel any sexual desires.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I don’t get aroused. I don’t have any sexual feelings at all, for anyone. I never have. But I like spending time with you, I like it better than I’ve ever liked spending time with anyone. You need to know that if you want me as more than a friend,” Draco explained.

“Oh.” He paused. “Never?”

“Never.”

Charlie lay there, lost in his own thoughts while Draco waited patiently for him. He hadn’t even considered Draco on a sexual level. Not yet, anyway. All he had wanted was to make Draco understand how much he meant to him, to sit there with him in his arms and tell him how he felt.

“It’s not about sex for me,” Charlie said. “I just want to be with you. If that only means that we’re just a little more than friends, that we just spend time together and hold hands, then I’m okay with that.”

Draco smiled at him. “Really?”

“Really.”

“Then…I mean…if that’s what being together as a couple means…spending time together and holding hands.…if only until I’m better…Charlie, will you be my boyfriend?”

Charlie smiled at the innocence in the question. “Yes, Draco, I will be your boyfriend.”

Draco sighed with relief. “Good. Because…I like spending time with you.”

“I like spending time with you too,” Charlie said, vaguely noticing that Draco had dimples when he smiled.

“So, how do I get warm if I can’t tell?” Draco asked.

“I could hold you, and tell you when you warm up,” Charlie offered. “We could cuddle…like Solarin and Bill do. Well…not quite like they do. But you get the idea. If…if you want to, that is.”

God, he was acting like a teenager again. He was twenty six, he should be more mature than this. But Draco just seemed to make him revert back ten years.

“Okay,” Draco said and Charlie watched as Draco turned over, facing away from him. The blond scooted back and Charlie felt himself grinning as Draco moved into his arms.

“I know that your arms are around me, I can see them, but can’t feel it,” Draco said. “But it’s not so bad being numb.”

“Really?” Charlie asked as he settled Draco in his arms, resting his head in the crook of his neck.

“Yeah. I mean, at least this way I don’t feel sick when someone touches me.”

“Well, I’m resting my head in the crook of your neck,” Charlie described. “And you’ve entwined your ankles with mine. Your feet are cold but they’re beginning to warm up.”

“Thank you, Charlie,” Draco whispered.

“You’re welcome.” Charlie laughed. “I kind of like it.”

“What?” Draco asked, amused.

“I know it’s kind of weird, but I like it. Me telling you what’s going on. It makes me feel…I don’t know…like I really am taking care of you.”

“Then I guess you can take care of me all you like,” Draco said, his eyes fixed on his fingers as he moved them over Charlie’s arm. “I can’t feel myself doing that but I see it.”

“I think we’re going to make a very good team,” Charlie said, smiling at the way Draco’s touch on his arm was so light it tickled.

“Me too.”

Draco had no more trouble falling asleep after that, and Charlie decided that he wanted to lay like this with Draco forever. Just like that, together, him taking care of his little Slytherin.

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Bill rolled over in his sleep to find the bed beside him empty. He cracked open his eyes and found Solarin curled in the window seat, staring out at the dark world below.

“Hey, you all right?” he asked, sitting up.

She uncurled herself and made her way back to bed, slipping into the covers. She lay on her back, her arms stretched over her head and Bill propped himself up on one elbow beside her.

“What’s on your mind, baby?” he asked, running his hand in circles across her covered stomach. “I can feel you worrying.”

“I’m guessing I’m not making a whole lot of sense right now in the connection,” she said, reaching out to toy with his hair.

“No, not a whole lot. Draco’s in there mostly, and there’s a bit about the Ministry, and something about Gringotts. That’s about all that is making sense.”

She smirked.

“I’m surprised you even managed to make that out. You’re getting better. It won’t be long before we’ll be completely clear on each other again,” she praised.

“You want to talk about it?”

She was silent for a long time, her hand still, and Bill almost began to believe that she had fallen asleep when she spoke.

“What if I can’t help him?” she asked, her fingers in his hair moving once more

“Draco?”

“Yeah. What if he gets really sick before I can figure this out?” she admitted.

“Well, you’re not alone. Tell me how I can help,” Bill said, his enthusiasm at three in the morning making her smile.

“You really are my second best hero, you know that?”

“I know, but I have always wondered who the first is,” Bill confirmed. “Will you tell me who number one is?”

“Severus. He’s my hero, my number one hero,” she explained.

“How do I bump him off first?” Bill joked.

“Sorry, but there is no chance. He’ll always be number one hero. You are a very close second.”

“How did he become number one, anyway?” 

“I don’t want to talk about that,” she said sternly, and he knew that they weren’t joking anymore. Her fingers had left his hair.

He sighed. “Why won’t you tell me? Whatever it is you’re keeping a secret from me, you can tell me. You can tell me anything. Why won’t you tell me?”

“Because I can’t,” she said simply and he knew that this continuing argument between them would continue to burn, but it was over for tonight.

“Fine.” He took a deep breath. “So, how can I help?”

It took her a moment to answer. She always did that, went quiet for a minute or two after he brought up what she wouldn’t talk about. It worried him that whatever it was might truly be that bad. She had never even let it slip through the connection, she was that adamant about keeping it to herself.

“How much sway do you have at Gringotts?” she asked.

“A bit. Depends on what I have to use it for.”

“Do you think you could get me records on the Malfoy vaults and estates?”

He laughed. “Boy, you don’t like making it easy for me do you?” She laughed at him. “Well, I could probably get them, if I can convince one of the goblins to turn a blind eye. I’ll probably only be able to get replicas, not the real thing, and I will end up owing the goblin who lets me get them a huge favour.”

“Will you do it for me?” she asked, her fingers playing with his hair once more.

“I can try. I’ll go tomorrow,” he said and she kissed him, deep and possessive. He grinned greedily into the kiss. God, he had missed this.

“Will you settle on a joint first with Severus?” she asked against his lips.

“Yes.”

“Then you’re my number one as well. He can be number one brother and you can be number one love. Will that do?”

“Yes. I’ll settle for that.”

“Good.” She sighed. “I’m sorry I can’t tell you. I will, one day, when I’m ready. But I’m not yet.”

“I can wait. I’m here when you’re ready,” he agreed, even if he wanted to know, she had never hidden anything else from him. Well, except her issues with the Ministry but she had eventually revealed those. This was the only thing she refused to discuss. She always had, and it had never really bothered him. Until now.

“I need something else from you,” she said teasingly, running her fingertips along his shoulder. He let his mind drop the subject. For now.

“What?” he asked cautiously.

“I need you to ask your father to smuggle some things out of the Ministry for me.”

“Arin, if you asked the Minister, he’d give you anything you want.” She looked sheepish and he laughed. “You forgot about that, didn’t you?”

“Yeah,” she admitted.

“Just write a letter to Fudge and ask him for what you want.”

“But what if he asks why I want records on the Malfoy’s?”

Ah, a slight hitch in the plan. Solarin would not be able to reveal why she wanted the records without revealing Draco’s problems. And if she revealed them, Fudge would want him tested on, to try and ascertain if it was something that the wizarding public could catch. He would take Draco from them, and Bill wasn’t sure if even Solarin could stop them.

“Good point. I’ll talk to my father. What do you want him to get?”

“Anything he can on the Malfoy line. Anything. I just need somewhere to start.”

“Remus might be the one to go to for help on this. He pieced together the research on Harry, didn’t he?” Bill suggested.

“Yeah, he did. But he’s gotten really close to Draco in the past few days. I heard that it was hard enough for him to do it for one of his sons. I don’t think it would be fair on him if I asked him to do it for both his children. Besides, Remus keeps disappearing,” Solarin revealed.

“Disappearing? Where to?” Bill asked, tracing the tattoo near her navel.

“He keeps going off with Dumbledore. I’ve kept my mind out of it. Whatever it is, it’s private.”

“Probably a wise decision. Is there anything else you need from me?”

“Not that I can think of right now.”

“Good, because I want to hear the story behind this tattoo,” Bill said with a smirk, bending his head to outline it with his tongue.

She moaned. “It was my twentieth birthday present to myself. It’s two runes. The one on the left is Wynn, it means happiness. It means to appreciate life fully, value the love and laughter in your life, and to welcome the ordinary things that make your life complete. The one on the right is Hagall, it means hail. It means that enemies are teachers in disguise and every challenge is there to guide you.”

“How did you know that I wouldn’t remember my ancient runes?” he asked, kissing his way up, pushing her top before him.

She squirmed and moaned as his lips moved over her pale skin. “Because you burnt the text books when you graduated.”

He laughed and it made her shiver.

“What about the nose ring?” he asked as he took a nipple into his mouth. 

“Ummm…twenty first birthday.” She gasped. “I…I chose silver because…because it helped focus me,” she stuttered, trying to focus without success. Her hands stole into his hair and pulled him up to kiss him. [Mine] she pushed into his head and he pinned her to the mattress.

They joined together, their union hard and fast. Sweat poured from them, teeth embedded into skin, nails carved a path. They used each other to forget, to lose themselves. When it was over, they lay entwined, Solarin’s head on Bill’s shoulder, her nails tracing paths on his chest.

“You know, I’m going to have to get you to tell me more stories,” Bill commented.

It earned him a slap on the chest but she gave a smile with it.

For now, he would settle for her promise to reveal all. It was enough. For now.

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Harry awoke to whimpering. He eased himself out of Severus’ arms and the warm bedding and padded over to the basket. He smiled down at his daughter, picking her up and holding her close.

She settled and began to root against him, searching.

“Eager, are we?” he murmured to her as he made his way back to bed, clumsily climbing back in. “Well, you’ll have to wait. Carrier only goes so fast, you know.”

“She probably can’t understand you yet,” Severus supplied. The obsidian eyed man was watching him, sitting up against the pillows and letting Harry settle against him, secure between the long legs. Severus curled one leg around Harry, snaking it under Harry’s slightly drawn up knees, and raised the other one, giving him support while he nourished the baby.

“I don’t care, I’m going to talk to her like that anyway,” Harry said stubbornly as Severus unbuttoned his top for him.

“It wasn’t a criticism. It was just an observation.”

Harry craned his head and caught his lips. “I know.”

Severus smiled at him and freed his breast, his arms coming to wrap around both of them as their little one latched on.

“I like your observations. They give me an excuse to be stubborn,” Harry said playfully.

“Careful, Potter, your Slytherin side is showing,” Severus joked, nuzzling his neck. Ever since Harry had told him he was nearly sorted into Slytherin he had been teasing him with it, whether it was true at the time or not.

“You love it.” Harry winced and looked down. “You want to be more gentle with carrier? I may need that boob again at some point.”

Severus chuckled. Harry tilted his head to give Severus better access to his neck. He moaned at the gentle nips and kisses.

“Will Draco be okay?” Harry asked.

“Solarin will figure it out. I have faith in her. She will take care of him,” Severus reassured. Harry nodded and kissed him. Severus devoted himself to Harry’s neck again, keeping the intimacy going during the nursing of their daughter.

“Severus?”

“Yes?”

“I think I’ve decided on her name.”

Severus pulled back and looked into the tired green eyes. “Finally? You’ve finally chosen one?”

“Yes, and don’t sound so shocked. I was bound to decide on one eventually. It’s only been five days.”

Severus kissed him possessively. He helped Harry detach her and wind her before she was attached to his other nipple. It was their way of keeping Severus involved. Harry was the only one who could feed her, and Harry had worried that Severus would become left out, so they had developed this little routine of doing it together.

“So, what are we going to call her?” Severus asked, running his fingers over her soft curls.

“I’ve decided on Miri Solarin Lily Potter-Snape. Miri means mine, which is true. She’s mine, and yours of course. But all the time I was pregnant I kept saying that she was mine. It seemed right for her,” Harry explained.

“It’s perfect, love. It’s perfect for her,” Severus soothed. Harry had seemed a bit flustered during his reasoning.

Harry smiled at him. “And then she has Solarin because she’s your sister, and Lily after my mother. Do you like it?”

“I love it. It’s just right for her. What do you think, Miri?” Severus asked the tiny girl. Her eyes had already turned bright emerald and she gazed up at her parents with them.

“I think she likes it,” Severus said. He kissed Harry again and Harry winced into the contact.

“Christ, she is trying to kill me with this,” Harry complained.

“Well, on the bright side, it looks like she’s done,” Severus consoled. They detached her and winded her, Harry holding her while Severus rubbed her back. She burped and together they rocked her back to sleep before Severus tucked her back into her basket, kissing her forehead.

Severus slipped back into bed and wrapped Harry into his arms, kissing him deep, like a brand.

“We have a family,” Severus whispered against his lips. “It’s all complete now she has a name. We can file her papers at the Ministry tomorrow.”

“Can we put you down instead of Lucius and get away with it?” Harry asked sleepily.

“She has my surname so you can put me down as her father without getting in trouble for it. However, legally, you don’t actually have to put down the man who provided the seed. Legally, she belongs to you and no other,” Severus explained.

“So I can put your name down?”

“Yes, you can.”

Severus moaned as Harry kissed him, his tongue snaking inside his mouth and duelling with his own. He really loved it when Harry showed his enthusiasm in this way.

“I love you,” Harry whispered. “You know that right?”

“I know. And I love you too.”

They snuggled down together and fell asleep until the next feeding, each smiling at their daughters title.

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Remus walked into the kitchen to find Solarin growling at a pile of papers.

“Something wrong?” he asked as he poured himself some tea and made some toast. Harry was hardly likely to come down at five in the morning so he felt it safe to enjoy the snack without upsetting anyone. With night feeds keeping he and Severus up, Harry usually slept until eight, when Miri demanded her breakfast, and then came down to join them all.

Solarin looked up at him. “I don’t know how you did it,” she complained, accepting a fresh coffee from him.

“Did what?”

“Sorted through all that paperwork on Harry. You have three times this much information on Harry. How the hell did you find any kind of order in it all?” she asked as he nibbled at his toast.

He smiled. “It took me a few days to get it in an order, and then it became easier to find what I actually needed. Is this all the stuff on Lucius?”

“Yes. Funny, I never expected Bill and Arthur to actually get me so much. I didn’t think they’d get even half this much.”

“I could help you with it if you like,” he offered.

She looked at him and he felt like he had said the wrong thing. Her eyes were kind and understanding, as if she knew something he didn’t. 

“Remus, you did this for Harry. It’s not fair of me to ask you to do it for your other child as well,” Solarin explained.

“You’re not asking, I’m offering,” Remus argued.

“You’re busy. I can’t accept your help.”

“Busy with what?” Remus asked. He was confused. All he was doing with his days was clearing out the house and writing text books on defence. He quite enjoyed his profession. At least when he only wrote the text books, he had no one objecting to a werewolf teaching their children.

“You keep going off with Dumbledore,” she said lightly, and he blanched. “I haven’t pried into it. I just keep seeing the two of you going off together. It’s obviously private so I haven’t used my abilities. It’s none of my business. But, like I said, you’re busy.”

He hadn’t realized anyone had noticed him slipping away. He debated the wisdom of telling her what the meetings were for. Only his Healer knew, and he wondered if she would tell Harry what he was doing if she knew.

“Can you keep a secret?” he asked.

“If I’m told something in confidence I can keep it to myself. If need be, I can even keep it from Bill. If you want to tell me, I can keep it to myself, if that is what you’re worried about.”

“You can keep things from Bill?”

She smiled at his disbelief. “If I want to. He may be good at reading me and the connection may be strong, but I’m still the augur in the relationship. I’m still in control of keeping my secrets to myself,” she said, and Remus noticed that she looked uncomfortable at the word ‘secrets’. He decided that she would not tell Harry, and that Dumbledore’s advice of telling someone his concerns might help him may just be true.

“I have experienced a little agitation accepting some things to do with Harry,” he admitted. “I need to reassure Sirius, so I have to appear to believe everything I say in my approval of it all. But I admit, I found it hard to deal with the thought of Lucius touching him, of what Lucius did to him. Sometimes the imagination is a terrible thing. His panic after he was rescued was difficult to watch, knowing that only Severus could really help him with it. I felt helpless knowing I couldn’t help my son the way Severus could. And then I had a little trouble with the idea of my son marrying a man old enough to be his father. And the notion of Harry having a baby at sixteen. It was a little hard for me to deal with.” He sighed. “Of course, it didn’t help that I watched Harry give birth. I felt useful, Harry needing me to be there, but seeing him in so much pain was troublesome for me. Just knowing that he was in so much pain and not being able to do anything to ease it didn’t sit well with me.”

“Understandable. It’s the mark of a good father that you had all those concerns. You should feel grateful that you have them. They prove that you’re a good parent, that you love him enough to have these issues,” she reassured and he smiled shyly, contemplating her. Albus had been right, it did feel better offering his problems to a fresh ear. She had rationalised it in such a simple way that it suddenly made him feel better about the last few months he had spent worrying. He had obviously chosen the right fresh ear. She had seemed to soothe him with such ease.

“You would make a wonderful shrink. Have you thought of it as a career?” he said in all seriousness.

“Vaguely. But with the Minister awarding me compensation for what the Department of Mysteries did to me, I don’t ever have to work again if I don’t want to.”

“The cheque was that large?”

“The Minister was feeling very guilty,” she said with a smirk. “I quite like the idea of your profession, though. It seems very calm, writing books. I might turn my hand to that.” She held up her pack of cigarettes. “Do you mind if I smoke? I’ll open the window.”

He smiled and shook his head. “Not at all, go ahead,” he said and she flicked her wand at the window, the glass springing open. She lit up and he wondered how she could make smoking look so easy. He had tried it once in his youth and he had been as sick as a dog. He supposed it must have been practice. “What subject would you write about?”

“Severus suggested I write about how to adapt to the Muggle World. Instructional books for wizards.”

“A novel idea,” he said and she laughed at him. He smiled and took a deep breath. “More recently, I have had trouble accepting Miri. In the beginning, I mean.”

“How so?” she asked concernedly.

“I was worried she would look like Lucius,” Remus admitted. “It made it hard for me to accept her, at first. I kept looking for him in her. I adore her now, now I know she looks like Harry. She’s his little clone, and that makes it easier.”

“I see. And Dumbledore is helping you to deal with these problems you have?” she said carefully. Severus had confided in her that Harry had experienced the same fears and they had led to the problems with Miri’s first feed. She was surprised that no one else had expressed the same issues. She felt relieved that Remus had eased her confusion.

“Yes. My inner wolf still has a little trouble with her, and I have no idea why. Albus can’t figure it out, nor Sirius, nor my Healer. My human side is fine with Miri. But not the wolf. Only time will tell with the beast. You won’t tell anyone, will you?”

“Of course not. As I said, it is private. If asked, I will say I know nothing and it is none of my business. As for the wolf, give it time is my suggestion.”

He smiled at her. “Thank you.”

“For what?” she said with a wink and he laughed. 

He turned to the pile of papers. “Would you like some help?”

“Are you sure you’ll be all right with dealing with all this information on Lucius?”

“Yes. It’s to help Draco, I’ll be fine with it.”

“Then yes, I would love some help,” she said, pushing the parchment pile closer to him. “All I’ve managed to work out is that there are a lot of Malfoy’s. Oh, and some weird thing about inheritance laws that I couldn’t quite understand. It was something to do with dowries.”

“Well, let’s get down to work,” Remus said.

Together they began to work through the mass of information, and were still organising when the others joined them for breakfast.

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Harry looked up in surprise as the smell of smoke entered the kitchen. Miri whimpered and wriggled in his arms and he noticed that he had roughly pulled her away from his nipple in his shock. He had gained confidence with his parenting skills in the three weeks since Miri had arrived and was now comfortable feeding his child in front of his family as well as Severus. It had caused a few odd looks the first time he did it, along with rather spectacular blushes from Sirius and Draco, but now it had become common place for people to walk into a room to find Harry topless with his bra open, revealing everything. Severus had assured Harry that he wouldn’t have to wear the bra any longer than Miri needed to nurse, and she would begin weaning at four months. Harry had accepted it and was gladly looking forward to the day when he could rid himself of the garments. He wished he could do it now, but he was still tender and the female underwear did help, so he continued to wear it constantly, even to bed. The only time he did take his bra off was to bathe.

“Sorry, sweetheart,” he apologised as he latched her on again. “Where is that smell coming from?”

Remus looked up from his papers. “I assumed it was Bill’s cooking,” he said, earning a glare from Bill. The redhead was standing at the cooker, stirring the stew that was promised for dinner. Solarin chuckled from the sink where she was peeling potatoes and Bill threw her a dirty look.

“It’s coming from the fireplace,” Severus said from where he sat to Harry’s left. As the words left his mouth, Albus stepped through the floo with Molly and Arthur following soon after. All three of them were covered in ash and smelled strongly of smoke.

“What happened?” Bill said, he and Charlie rushing to their parents.

“The Burrow has gone up in smoke, as has Spinners End. Lucius has burnt them down,” Albus supplied.

“When?” Harry asked, his mouth dry.

“Spinners End went up a few hours ago. The Burrow is still ablaze. Molly and Arthur were still inside when he started the fire.”

Molly and Arthur were helped to seats by their sons and Harry noticed that even through his obvious shakiness, Arthur still sported a slight blush at his exposed chest. He covered up the free breast he had absentmindedly left exposed, Arthur nodding gratefully at him.

“Are you all right?” Severus asked the shell-shocked couple.

“We’re all right,” Molly confirmed. “But everything is gone. Ron, Hermione and Ginny are supposed to be coming home from Hogwarts tomorrow, what are we going to do?”

“There’s plenty of room here, you’ll stay here with us until we figure this all out,” Sirius assured.

“We can’t impose,” Arthur argued but Remus held up his hand.

“You’re family. It is no imposition. Besides, where would you take your children if not here? You will all be safe here. Hermione is due in July, you need somewhere safe for her. Ginny is underage. You will stay here, if only for the time being,” Remus declared firmly. Molly kissed him on the cheek.

Harry detached Miri and handed her to Severus to wind. He refastened his bra and pulled on his t-shirt. It was all his fault. Lucius had done this because of him. He felt more than guilty, he felt paralysed. The Weasley’s were some of the best people he knew, Molly was the closest to a mother he had. They had nearly been killed because of him.

“I’m so sorry,” Harry mumbled. He watched Severus pass Miri to Solarin and felt him gather him into his arms as his tears began to fall. “It’s all my fault, I’m so sorry.”

“Harry, dear, this isn’t your fault,” Molly soothed. Her kind tone made him feel even worse, if it were possible.

“Yes, it is. If it wasn’t for me he wouldn’t have done this. You could’ve died and it’s my fault.”

He was crying outright now and Miri was beginning to whimper at the tension in the room. She never cried outright but she did whimper, and it just made Harry feel awful at that moment. His daughter and he were the reason the Ron and Hermione and Ginny had no home to go to. They were the reason Hermione had nowhere to have her baby. Molly and Arthur had lost everything because of him, because of her.

Arthur got up from his seat and settled in the one next to Harry’s, forcing him to look at his gentle reassuring smile.

“Harry, you’re family. We knew that Lucius would get worse, we chose to take the risk of staying at the Burrow. We’re safe, that’s all that matters. Everything else is just stuff. It can be replaced. This is not your fault. It is Lucius’. He did this, not you,” Arthur placated.

“But he wouldn’t have done it if it wasn’t for me and Miri,” Harry argued.

“You’re being stubborn again,” Severus murmured in his ear. “This wasn’t your fault, love. Believe us. It was not your fault. Don’t blame yourself for this.”

“You promise it wasn’t my fault? You promise he didn’t do this because of me and Miri?” Harry questioned. He knew Severus was telling him what he wanted to hear, telling him pretty lies. But he didn’t mind. He accepted it.

“I promise. Lucius did this because he is a sadistic son of a bitch, and believe me, I know. I met his mother once. Horrible woman,” Severus promised, making Harry let out a shaky laugh. Solarin came forwards and Harry gathered Miri in his arms, holding her close. She let out her crow like call and he smiled shakily. “He did this because he is punishing us, because we have you and he doesn’t. It is not your fault, it is his. He’s jealous, love. He wanted to keep you and you wouldn’t let him, we wouldn’t let him. He’s being a spoilt, self-indulgent little boy throwing a temper tantrum. All right?”

Harry nodded and Albus began to clean up Molly and Arthur with his wand. He siphoned off the ash and dispelled the lingering odour of smoke. When he was done, they still looked a little shaky, but overall much better.

“All your books are gone,” Harry said to Severus.

“There are plenty to keep me occupied here. They can be replaced.”

“Wasn’t there anything in Spinners End you will miss?”

“I have all I need from that house. I have you and Miri. That’s all I need,” Severus said firmly and Harry smiled.

“So, what now? What about Ron, Hermione and Ginny? They can’t go to Kings Cross tomorrow. Lucius can get to them there,” Charlie asked.

“I will bring them through the floo myself,” Dumbledore replied easily, cleaning himself up. “I must leave you, I must report this to the Ministry.”

“We’ll see you tomorrow,” Sirius said.

“Thank you, Albus. Thank you for everything,” Arthur said and the old wizard nodded. With a polite farewell he was gone.

Miri sneezed and everyone noticed smoke for another reason entirely.

“Bill!” Solarin cried, exasperated, retrieving the smoking pot from the stove and shoving it under the cold tap.

“Why are you yelling at me? You could have saved it!” Bill said angrily.

“Because you were meant to be taking care of it!”

“Excuse me, but my parents were just almost burnt to a crisp. I apologise if they’re a little more important to me than a stew.”

“Don’t get sarcastic with me!” she threatened, advancing on him. 

Harry had never seen the two of them fight, and this one had seemed to come out of nowhere. He had never even seen them bicker. Severus seemed to be stunned as well, as did everyone else. Maybe Severus had been right when he had claimed to never have seen the two of them fight before. Maybe they never had.

“Why not? You do it all the time, Miss Slytherin,” Bill snapped.

“Oh, so you’d rather I was all noble like you? Sorry, but joining the society for lost little puppies isn’t my thing,” she spat. The glasses began to shake.

“No, I’d rather you were god damned human! You might not give a fuck about your parents, but I care about mine! I shouldn’t be surprised, you’re a cold hearted bitch!”

She reached out and slapped him hard across the face, her nails catching his skin and opening a gash just under his eye. The tumblers exploded, raining shards onto the floor. Bill’s angry statement hung in the air between them, as solid as a brick wall. Miri squirmed in Harry’s arms at the anger sizzling through the room.

“How dare you?” she breathed. She looked slightly shocked by her own actions.

“You are cold hearted. You won’t open up. Why won’t you tell me?” Bill accused.

“Fuck!” she screamed. “It’s been weeks and you’re still on this!”

“Yes! I’m still on this! We’re meant to be together and you’re keeping secrets from me! Just tell me!”

“No!”

“Why? Why won’t you tell me?”

“Because it’s none of your fucking business, that’s why! You’re the good hearted Gryffindor, finish off dinner yourself!” she yelled and threw the dishtowel at him before storming from the room, the door slamming behind her.

The room was deathly silent and Bill was breathing heavily through his nose, his fists clenched at his sides. No one seemed quite sure what to say.

“Are you all right?” Arthur asked.

“Fine. Just peachy,” Bill snapped.

“What was that all about?” Molly enquired.

Bill turned on her. “Like she said, none of your business. Stay out of it.” With that he stomped from the room and they heard the front door slam a few moments later.

“What just happened?” Draco asked from where he was half hidden behind Charlie. Charlie turned and pulled Draco into his arms.

“I’m rubbing your back,” they heard Charlie mutter to him and Draco nodded, watching his arms as they wrapped around Charlie’s ribs.

“I have no idea,” Severus said, his voice full of shock. “I’ve never seen the two of them like that. They didn’t do that at Hogwarts, not once in their whole time there. The worst they ever go to was bickering.”

Sirius began to clean up the kitchen and Molly moved to fix something else for dinner. Remus slipped from the room and returned a few moments later with an angry looking Solarin. They all decided not to ask her why that had flared so spectacularly.

“I should go and put Miri down,” Harry said and gathered her more securely to his chest. Severus kissed his cheek and he left the room. There was a long uncomfortable silence.

“What should I make?” Molly asked cheerfully, trying to dispel some of the tension.

“How about that chicken casserole you did the other week? That was delicious,” Draco suggested and Molly set about cutting up a chicken.

“I’m sorry,” Solarin said quietly as Molly slipped the covered dish into the oven. “I’m sorry you all had to witness that.”

“What happened?” Severus asked as Harry slipped back into the room.

“It’s nothing. It’s our issue,” she replied and Severus dropped the subject.

They all ate dinner in silence, all of them throwing covert glances at the dark haired woman stabbing at her plate.

Bill didn’t come back that night, or the one after that. When he did finally come back he chose to sleep on Charlie’s floor. Harry wondered if the two of them would ever work things out if they couldn’t even stay in the same room together for more than five minutes. Solarin became more and more distant as the days wore on. Harry spent most of his time in his room with Ron, Hermione and Ginny, the three of them fussing over Miri.

As the days turned into a full week of silence between the once flawless couple, Severus began to look more and more worried.

It was starting to become a war zone.

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Severus’ dream was crying. That couldn’t be right. Harry didn’t cry in his sleep anymore. 

He cracked his eyes open and felt his heart leap into his throat as he caught sight of Harry sitting up in bed.

“Relax, it’s not me,” Harry said, his voice sleepy but light. “I’m giving Miri cuddles, she’s a little restless.”

Severus groaned as he sat up. “Is she all right?”

“She’s fine, just a little restless. Kind of like she was when she was inside me. I tried feeding her but she’s not hungry, and she’s not wet. She doesn’t seem to be unhappy, just wide awake.”

“You should have woken me,” Severus assured.

“It’s all right. I was going to if she didn’t settle soon.”

“I’m surprised I didn’t wake up to her when you did.”

“It’s only been two hours since her last feed. I think me and you have adjusted to a weird body clock thing. I bet you’ll be awake at four when she actually wants feeding,” Harry reassured. Severus kissed him and kissed Miri’s tiny fist that was waving at him.

Severus became aware of the crying again and looked around confusedly.

“It’s coming from somewhere else in the house. I’ve been up for about ten minutes so I’m not quite sure how long it’s been going on,” Harry explained. 

“Stay here, I’ll go and see who it is,” Severus instructed. He kissed Harry on the lips and Miri on the forehead before he left the room. He wandered through the house, steadily getting closer to the source of the disturbance. 

He found himself outside Solarin’s room. It had been two weeks since the kitchen fight. Not a word had been said between Solarin and Bill except to snap and yell at each other in the passing days. Three days ago, Bill had gone to stay with the twins in Diagon Alley. Remus was standing outside the door, knocking and trying to persuade Solarin to let him in.

“How long has she been crying?” Severus asked.

“About an hour. Well, as far as I know. She won’t open the door,” Remus explained. “Sirius has tried, as has Draco, Charlie, Molly and Arthur. Even Ron, Hermione and Ginny have given it a shot. She won’t talk to any of us. We were just about to come and get you.”

“It’s all right, I’ll take over. Go back to bed,” Severus reassured. Remus looked hesitant but he did go, leaving Severus facing the door alone. “Sol, it’s Severus. Let me in.”

“Go away,” came the quiet sob.

“Please, sweetheart. Please, let me in,” he said, using the same mellow tone he had when she was little, when she had still been timid.

“Please, just leave me alone.”

She sounded in real pain and Severus began to panic. She had once locked herself in the bathroom when she was about nine. Severus had eventually had to break down the door, she had let her magic flare wildly so his spells had not gotten through, and it turned out she had gotten into a fight at school. She had had a broken arm that time, so the pained sobs were not making him feel any better.

Severus raised his wand and performed an unlocking charm, finding she had not used magic to secure it. He opened the door and slipped into the room.

“I told you to go away, Sevus. Please, just leave me alone,” she begged. She was sitting on her bed, cross-legged, hugging herself. Tears were pouring down her face and she was having trouble breathing through her sobs. 

She had called him Sevus. She only did that when she wanted something, was calming him, or was in trouble.

“I’m not going anywhere. Not until you talk to me,” Severus argued. He moved to the bed and sat down. He wasn’t surprised when she launched herself at him, sobbing into his chest. He rocked her, the way he had when she was small, and waited.

“Sevus,” she mumbled.

“I’m here now, Sevus is here. How about you tell me what the problem is, hmm? Maybe I can help,” he bargained.

She let out a shaky laugh. “Can you go back in time?”

“No. Unfortunately, Harry and his friends destroyed all the time turners when he was fighting Voldemort. But I might still be able to help. Tell me what’s wrong, sweetheart.”

She cried for a few more minutes before she answered.

“I’m losing him.”

“Bill loves you. I know he does,” Severus assured, not needing an explanation of who she was losing.

“But he doesn’t trust me, and I don’t blame him.”

He pulled her back and looked her in the eye. “Why doesn’t he trust you? What’s happened between you two? I’ve never seen you like this.”

“I’m keeping secrets from him, and he knows I am. That’s what he doesn’t trust, that I don’t trust him enough to tell him. But I do trust him, I trust him completely. But I can’t tell him. I don’t know how,” she admitted. “I can’t tell him about mum.”

Severus sat there stunned. He had always assumed she had told Bill about their parents when she was in Hogwarts. Maybe not all of it but at the very least told him that their mother had been slaughtered by their father. He had never considered that she would have kept it a secret.

“Why can’t you tell him?” he asked.

“How can I? How do I tell someone who’s parents are the most loving wonderful people that my father killed my mother? How do I tell him that?”

Severus could see the problem. Bill could not fully understand. Solarin could barely remember their mother, and the most vivid memory she did have of her was her death. Bill had grown up with a loving family, with no fear, no pain, no drunken slurs and badly concealed sobs of agony and misery. He and Solarin had spent their formative years listening to fights, witnessing abuse, suffering it. How did she tell him?

“I see. How bad is it between you?” Severus asked.

“I can barely feel the connection anymore. It’s so weak. He’s pulling away and I don’t know how to stop him,” she managed to get out before she dissolved into agonising sobs that threatened to choke her. He held her close and smoothed back her hair, soothing her the way he had done all those years ago.

Severus placed the dirty plates in the sink and turned on the water. Solarin was due to start Hogsmites the next day and he had allowed her to choose take away from The Three Broomsticks as their dinner.

Hogsmites was an elite primary school for gifted little witches and wizards. It was situated in Hogsmeade so he could teach and provide her with a good education simultaneously. Albus had helped him set it all up. They had a little house in Hogsmeade. It had only two bedrooms, a bathroom and a kitchen cum living room. It was a tiny cottage but it was theirs. It even had a small garden for Solarin to play in. It was perfect, and Severus felt, for the first time since he had left Hogwarts a year ago, that he was home.

He spun round as glass broke behind him. Solarin was standing at the table, staring in horror at the orange juice spreading from the broken cup that had slipped from her diminutive hands.

“Solarin,” Severus began kindly but he stopped when she burst into tears and backed up, turning and running from the room. He spelled away the mess and went in search of her. He found her hiding under her bed.

“Sol, come out of there,” he urged softly, watching her shake her head at him. “Sol, come on. I won’t hurt you, sweetheart. I’m not angry.”

“Really?” came her timid reply.

“Really. I’m not angry. It was an accident. I’m not going to hurt you for it, I know you didn’t mean to do it.”

She crawled out cautiously and he scooped her up, settling on the bed with her on his lap. She burrowed against his chest and sobbed. He smoothed back her hair, working out the dust that she had picked up from the floor.

“Sorry, Sevus. It was a ackdunt. I didn’t mean to,” she mumbled, mangling the word ‘accident’. She had no problems with the word ‘sorry’, though. She had said it too many times to their father.

“Sol, I know it was an accident. Your hands are very little, you’re bound to drop things. I’m not mad at you,” he explained.

“Daddy got mad,” she sniffed.

“Yes.” He sighed. “Yes, daddy got mad. Daddy got very mad. But I won’t hurt you like he did. I promise.”

“Never?”

“Never ever. I will never do that to you. Sol, I love you. You’re not meant to hurt people you love.”

She nodded and he held her for hours, telling her all the things she was good at, slowly undoing the damage their father had done.

Solarin fell asleep against his chest and he eased her into the bedding, tucking her in, before making his way from the room. He cast a tempus charm to find that it was three in the morning. He made his way downstairs to the kitchen. He needed a drink to settle his worries.

He had never seen his sister as happy as she had been with Bill. She had smiled with him, real smiles, not those fake ones she was so good at. She had actually laughed.

He was through his first whisky and onto his second when he noticed he was not alone in the kitchen. He turned around to find Bill sitting at the table, smoking one of Solarin’s cigarettes. Severus was mildly surprised to see him, he was supposed to be with Fred and George, but his surprise was quickly taken over by anger.

“Is she all right?” Bill asked, his voice quiet and resigned.

“No, she’s not and you know it! She can feel you pulling away! She fucking cried herself to sleep! She’s terrified she’s about to lose you!” Severus snarled. 

“She is,” Bill said simply.

“You promised me! You swore to me that you would never hurt her!” Severus yelled, slamming his glass down on the table between them.

“I never meant to!” Bill argued. “You think I like this? You think I enjoy seeing her in pain, hearing her crying? I hate it but it’s not working with us!” Bill seemed to deflate. “I don’t know what to do,” he admitted.

“You talk to her,” Severus answered immediately. “Even a bone headed Gryffindor like you should have been able to figure that one out.”

Severus knew he shouldn’t have said it, but man did it feel good.

“Don’t you think I’ve tried? You were here in the kitchen that day, you saw how well we managed to talk. She won’t tell me. Whatever this big dark secret is of hers, she won’t let me in on it. I’m not good enough to know, apparently,” he said bitterly and Severus calmed down.

Bill wasn’t trying to hurt her, he was trying to be closer to her. But her parents were a wedge between them, driving deeper and deeper.

Severus sat down and took a deep breath. Severus knew that he would have to face his own demons to help the redhead figure this out. And Solarin would be furious with him, but he knew that it was for the best. If it meant that the two of them would talk once more, it was worth her fury.

“Do you know that I raised Sol?” Severus asked.

“Yes. She told me when we were younger that she was raised by her brother. I didn’t know it was you at the time,” Bill confirmed.

“What do you know of our parents?”

Bill looked at him in surprise. He gave a hollow laugh. “All I know is that, at some point, you had them. She never talks about them. I mean nothing, I don’t even know their names.”

“Eileen was our mother and Tobias was our father,” Severus supplied immediately and Bill nodded, grasping that Severus might be about to reveal everything Solarin couldn’t.

Severus studied the younger man. He looked about as good as Solarin did. There were dark circles under his eyes and he looked to be in pain. He was paler than usual, it made his freckles stand out, and his hair was messy and lank.

He took a deep steadying breath and gulped down the last of his whisky before he spoke again. “Bill, our father killed our mother. He stabbed her with a broken bottle. Sol watched it.”

Bill’s jaw dropped and he looked like he was going to be sick but he didn’t. He just sat there looking at the Potions Master, waiting.

“Sol was four. I wasn’t there, I arrived as the police did. Sol watched our father murder our mother. Before that, when we were young, our father was an alcoholic. He hated magic and used violence to keep us in line. He battered Solarin for the first four years of her life. He died in prison.”

“Why would he do that to her?” Bill whispered. He looked like he was about to dig up their father and kill him again so Severus poured him a whisky and pressed it into his hands before he answered.

“Because Sol is an augur. She was walking through dreams and performing magic well beyond your skill when she was two. He didn’t like it, so he tried to beat it out of her. It is not so dissimilar to the Dursley’s thinking when it came to Harry, though they never went to the extremes of my father, and for that I am sure we are all grateful.”

Bill gulped down the whole glass of alcohol before he spoke again.

“Why couldn’t she tell me? I love her, I would have understood. She could have told me. Why didn’t she?”

“No, you wouldn’t have understood,” he said and Bill looked like he wanted to argue with him but he held up his hand and the curse breaker fell silent. “Bill, no matter how stretched your parents were with seven of you, they did, in fact, love you. Our father never loved us, or at the least we never saw any evidence of it, and our mother was always too afraid to stand up to him. You had wonderful, loving parents who never hit each other. You never had to watch your mother being beaten by your father. You didn’t wake up to the smell of alcohol every morning. You didn’t watch your mother murdered. You cannot possibly comprehend what Sol’s first few years were like. That is why she could not tell you. You had a wonderful family and she had a broken one. She trusts you. She really does. She just didn’t know how to tell you.”

Bill nodded and Severus poured him another whisky. “How do I fix this?” Bill asked.

“I do not know. All I know is that now you are informed. There are no more secrets between you. Where you go from here is up to you. You love each other. That is as good a place as any to begin.”

Severus stood up and quietly left the room, leaving Bill to work through what he had revealed. He knew that he hadn’t gone into details, not real ones, but he just couldn’t. It had been hard enough to reveal what he had.

He made his way back to bed and curled himself around Harry, burying his head in his neck. 

“Are you okay?” Harry whispered into the dark, running his hands along the slim arms wrapped around his waist, his husbands head pushed into his neck.

“No,” Severus muttered. Despite himself, tears began to fall as memories crept in.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“It’s about my parents,” Severus replied and Harry didn’t say anything. Severus didn’t explain further, he didn’t have to. Not to Harry. Harry knew it was not a topic to discuss.

Harry rolled over, pulled him close and let him cry, let him hold him, so tight he couldn’t move. But Harry didn’t complain at the crushing hold. Harry simply kissed his tears and smoothed his hair, whispering sweet reassurances to him. Once Severus was able to breathe properly, and able to loosen his hold slightly, Harry slipped from the bed and returned with a sleeping Miri. He put her into Severus’ arms and curled around them, the infant settled between her parents bodies. Harry wrapped his hands around the back of Severus’ neck and kissed him, deep and comforting, driving away any thoughts of the past.

It was this that made Severus love him so much. It was the fact that he didn’t have to explain to Harry what had happened with his parents. It was that Harry understood that it was too hard to go into detail. It was that Harry understood how much he needed him. Harry knew exactly what to do, what to say, to make it better.

Severus loved Harry because Harry could save him from himself.

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Harry watched with interest as Bill cautiously approached Solarin. It had been three days since Severus had revealed the truth to the curse breaker, and the once flawless couple had still to talk.

Bill had attempted several times to apologise but so far Solarin had managed to scare him off. Harry wondered if he would actually manage it today. It was different today, as he was doing it with everyone as a witness. All the house’s inhabitants were gathered around the table, enjoying each others company after a dinner cooked by Molly. The Weasley matriarch had taken to cooking all meals as a show of gratitude for the safe haven Sirius and Remus had given her family. Harry was distracted from the now familiar scene by his daughter.

Miri was babbling away happily to Hermione, who was holding her, perched on her bump. Hermione was only a week away from her due date and Harry was looking forward to there being a little playmate for Miri. Hermione seemed to be nervous about her impending delivery and they were all doing their best to reassure her. So far, they weren’t having much luck.

Ron reached over and tickled Miri’s bare feet and she shrieked, kicking out in protest. She whimpered and Harry retrieved her from his friends, Ron looking apologetic for his forgetfulness, and walked around with her to try and soothe her offended sensibilities, murmuring soothing words. She hated having her feet touched so much that Harry often had trouble getting socks onto her. He was just thankful that it was a sweltering day. Miri was dressed only in a vest and still she was over warm. 

Severus came over to them and recast the weak cooling charm on her, easing her discomfort slightly.

“Solarin, can we talk?” Bill asked. The augur spun round from the sink where she was scrubbing dishes by hand and glared at him. Her eyebrow raised slightly and Harry considered it the only thing she was going to give to tell Bill to continue.

“I’m sorry,” Bill said softly. “I’m sorry for what I’ve said to you.”

Harry took a few steps back as she spoke, her voice was that full of venom. He backed up into Severus’ chest and his husband’s hands came to rest on his shoulders.

“You’re sorry? Sorry for which part? The part where you called me a heartless bitch? Or maybe the one where you claimed that I was completely selfish? How about the comment about who I may have fucked while in the Muggle World? I believe for that one you referred to me as a whore,” she snarled. “Which one in particular are you apologising for this time?”

“All of it. Everything. I didn’t mean it,” he said steadily.

“If you didn’t mean it, why did you say it?”

“Because I was angry. And if I remember correctly, you gave as good as you got. Just putting that out there, not angling for another fight,” he put in quickly. She looked like she was about to hit him again, but apart from the slap across the face in the kitchen that day, Solarin had not raised her hand again. Harry had the suspicion that she was ashamed of herself for it.

“So, what is it that you want from me? Because if this is about me not telling you again, you can fuck off now,” she said flatly.

“I wanted to tell you that I don’t need you to tell me.”

“Oh, so you’ve finally given up then?” she said, her eyes narrowed in suspicion.

“It’s not giving up. I know, Arin.”

Severus guided Harry back to his seat and whispered in his ear to stay there. Severus moved back to the middle of the room, leaving himself in an open space. He looked guilty and Harry realised that whatever Bill now knew, Severus must have been the one to tell him. Solarin would go ballistic.

“Know what?” she asked slowly.

“I know what happened to your parents. I know why you won’t talk about them.”

The room was deathly silent and Harry could literally feel Severus shrinking back as Solarin turned to him.

“Who told you?” she asked Bill, her eyes fixed on her brother, her voice low and calm. It was the same dangerous tone that Scary Professor Snape had when Harry was in trouble in potions and Harry felt himself shrink back slightly out of pure habit. 

“Arin…” Bill began.

“Who?”

Bill hung his head in defeat but Severus saved him from her wrath.

“I did,” Severus answered. “I told him.”

Harry was impressed by Severus managing not to piss himself. She was positively terrifying. She advanced on the Potions Master slowly, like a predator. Her eyes were dark and cold, and she was tensed, ready to strike. Severus took a few steps back until he was pressed against the wall. She was well inside his personal space now, and even though her head didn’t even reach his shoulder, she still looked absolutely petrifying.

“What gave you the right to do that?” she asked, looking up at him. “What gave you the right to interfere?”

“I was trying to help,” Severus answered. “You didn’t know how to tell him, so I did it. I did what I thought was best.”

“In what twisted way is that best? Best for who? For me? Or for you?”

“For you.”

“No, you did this for you. You did this because you’re a control freak. You can’t stand the thought that I might not need you to help. I told you to go away that night. You didn’t because you just have to know. You have to have your hooked nose in everything.”

“I did this because he made you happy and I wanted you to have that once more,” Severus argued. Harry was shocked by how abusive she was being to him. He had thought she had never been mean like this in her whole life. From his husbands reaction, he was starting to understand that she lashed out when she lost control, when she was hurting.

“It was none of your business.”

“You are my sister, I was trying to take care of you,” Severus placated. Well, from his tone he was trying to placate. But it seemed to be some kind of trigger. Solarin backed up, her hands held to her temples, her eyes closed. She let out a kind of bitter half laugh as her eyes snapped open. Her hands fell and hit her thighs.

“Don’t you get it? I don’t need you to take care of me anymore! I can take care of myself!” she screamed at him, waving her hands at him. She looked around at the rest of the people in the room. Her eyes landed on Harry and Severus’ own black orbs filled with fear. “Well, maybe this is the point where I should ask if you’ve told Harry everything. So, Snivellus, have you?”

“Solarin, don’t do this,” Severus begged, ignoring the insult to his name, and Harry wanted her to stop but he couldn’t speak. He felt himself scared of what might happen if he voiced protest, and afraid of what she might say if he didn’t.

“Oh, I take that as a no. Well, don’t you think he should know? Don’t you think that, as your sister, I should tell him? After all, I’m only doing it because I care, because I want to take care of you,” she asked mockingly.

“I have told him all he needs to know,” Severus said calmly. “He doesn’t need you to reveal details.”

“And what did you reveal on my behalf?” she asked. “Come on, I want to know.”

“I told him what happened to mum. I told him what dad was like when we were young. I told him why I was the one to raise you,” Severus reeled off and Solarin looked at him with cold eyes.

She stared at him for the longest two minutes Harry could ever remember. It was like waiting for an explosion or something. And then she seemed to wilt in on herself. She closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around her waist as her head dropped. Severus moved forwards and touched her shoulder lightly but she pushed him away.

“I don’t want to talk to you right now. I don’t want to talk to any of you,” she said shakily. They all watched as she left the room, and then heard the front door close.

A shocked silence followed her departure and Severus heaved a sigh of relief. 

“The last time she took me on like that I ended up in the hospital wing for three days,” Severus said as he sat down next to Harry, trembling slightly. “That was rather tame by her standards.”

“That was tame?” Ron asked in disbelief. “At one point I felt sure she was going to kill someone or something.”

“Trust me, Mr Weasley, that was tame.”

Bill was standing uncertainly by the sink. “Should I go after her?” he asked.

“No,” Severus said firmly. “Leave her be. When a new situation that she doesn’t know how to deal with arises, she sulks. She goes off for a while by herself to try and figure it out. She’ll come back when she’s ready.”

“I shouldn’t have said anything,” Bill said guiltily as he sat down. Severus shook his head.

“You said what you thought was appropriate at that particular moment. She was going to discover my involvement sooner or later. Just be thankful she didn’t remember her wand during that little display,” Severus soothed.

Harry could feel Severus shaking beside him, and he looked pale. He eased himself from his chair and into Severus’ lap. The slim arms came around him and Severus kissed his neck, stroking Miri’s curls.

They all sat there in silence, waiting.

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Moody didn’t usually spend a lot of time in his house. He had retired a few years ago, but he was still called into the Ministry on a regular basis. The younger Aurors benefited from his experience and he felt that it was his duty to educate them. He usually spent his nights in Enchantment, teaching the younger witches and wizards what to look out for on a night out. 

As stated, Moody didn’t usually spend a lot of time in his house. But tonight he had actually made it home in time to eat a dinner he cooked for himself. The weather had cooled to a nice summer evening. He had just settled into his favourite armchair by the fireplace with a good book when he heard the crack of Apperation outside his door. He grabbed his wand and trained it on the door. 

The mystery person knocked.

If it was someone coming to kill him, they wouldn’t knock.

He got unsteadily to his feet and clunked over to the door. He peered through his spy hole and opened it to expose a shaken looking Solarin.

“I’m sorry, I know it’s late and I probably put you on red alert with the Apperation. It’s just I’ve been walking around for a few hours and I didn’t know where else to go,” she explained, her voice hoarse and quiet.

He stepped back and ushered her in. He sat her down in his favourite chair and handed her a glass of amber liquid. He took the seat opposite her and waited.

“I can’t drink alcohol,” she mumbled, trying to give him back the glass.

“Trust me, you can handle it. It’s only one, and it’s muggle brandy. It won’t damage your control like wizarding liquors, not one small drink. You look like you need one before you reveal to me what happened,” Moody argued. She nodded and gulped it down, wincing at the taste. She coughed at the burning it caused and handed him back his glass. “Now, what happened?”

She looked at him and he could see that she was debating the wisdom of keeping it a secret from him. If she didn’t want to tell him, he wouldn’t push it, but he doubted she would keep it from him. He had fair helped Severus to raise her. No little girl lied to one of her parents when things were as bad as they appeared to be.

Solarin looked about twelve again as she curled up in his chair and rested her head on her knee. Her hair fell down around her shoulders and Moody could remember the time she had accidentally lost control and set it on fire. He and Severus had been forced to cut it to a severe bob.

“Severus told Bill about mummy and daddy,” she whispered and he sighed. As issues go, the one of her parents was a doosy.

“Why did he tell him?”

“Because I couldn’t. Me and Bill weren’t doing so good. He was trying to help. And when I found out I went a bit mad.”

“How mad?” he asked, knowing just how well her temper could get the best of her.

“I said some things to Sev. Things I shouldn’t have said,” she replied and Moody didn’t need her to elaborate. He knew how much of a big mouth she had when she lost control of her artistic temperament.

Moody sat there in silence. Dumbledore, with Severus’ permission, had informed him of Eileen and Tobias when he had first agreed to train Solarin. Moody had insisted on knowing all the facts before he took her on, so Dumbledore had given them to him. Moody was well aware that the truth of Solarin and Severus’ childhoods was something only a few select people knew of. 

And for Severus to tell Weasley of it willingly, that displayed an acceptance of the young man as the one who made the augur happy.

“Severus will forgive you. He always has. He knows you too well to take anything you throw out during a fit of temper to heart. Just apologise to him,” Moody instructed.

She nodded and Moody was well aware that she was about to reveal the real reason for her wandering around alone in the middle of the night. It was the way she worked.

“How do I face Bill now?” she whispered, looking him in the eye for the first time that night. Her eyes were full of sadness and worry.

“Bill loves you. If he didn’t he wouldn’t have wanted to know so badly that Severus had to tell him. You just talk to him.”

She snorted. “We haven’t been doing too well with the whole talking thing lately.”

“I’m betting your temper hasn’t helped things.”

She shook her head.

“Sol,” Moody said. “You just talk to him. Talk and listen, and try to keep your temperament calm.”

She nodded and smiled at him. “Can I stay here tonight?” she asked.

“Course. You know where the spare room is,” he agreed. It wasn’t the first time she had needed a place to cool off.

She nodded and kissed him on the cheek before she made her way up the stairs. 

Moody felt like he was getting soft in his old age. But he knew that she got under his skin, she always had.

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Bill lay in his and Solarin’s bed alone. Severus had insisted that he stay and he hadn’t had the strength to refuse. 

Tears poured down his face yet he didn’t wipe them away. He couldn’t feel the connection anymore and it was tearing him apart. In all his life he had never loved anyone but her. She was all he had ever wanted, ever. He had never even looked at another woman. There were no fantasies about famous witches in his imaginings, there never had been. Only her. Only Solarin.

And now he had lost her.

That wasn’t the only reason for his tears. He kept picturing her as a little girl, running in fear. He couldn’t help it, it just kept creeping in. And with it came anger. The thought of someone hurting his beautiful fiery girl made his blood boil. And to think that it was her own father, well, he could hardly comprehend it. How could a father do that to their child? How could her father do that to her, her who was so special?

[Bill.]

He sat bolt upright as her voice floated softly into his head. 

[Bill, can you hear me?] she asked, her voice becoming stronger.

[I can hear you, though it’s faint,] he pushed back through the connection. [Where are you? Are you all right? I’m so sorry, baby. I am so very sorry.]

[Hush, it’s all right. I understand. I’m at Moody’s, I’m all right. My voice is faint because the connection is weak. It’s getting stronger now,] she explained, but he ignored it. 

[No, it’s not all right. I never should have said any of those things to you. I was so far out of line I couldn’t even see the line anymore. And I shouldn’t have pushed it. I should have left it alone. I am so sorry, Arin.]

He could feel her smiling softly and he let out a breath he hadn’t known he had been holding.

[I should have told you,] she said quietly, and he knew it was only her uncertainty that made her quiet and not a weakening of the connection again. 

[No, it was your business and I should have been patient. I should have respected your privacy. I’m sorry.]

He could feel her hesitation. [I’m sorry I hit you,] she whispered and he sent a mental hug through to her.

[You were angry. I forgive you,] he said and she mentally smiled shakily at him.

He wanted to comfort her, but he didn’t know how. So he did the only thing he could think of: he was honest.

[Is it true? Did your father really hurt you?] he asked and he felt her nausea.

[Yes.] she replied and paused, gathering herself. He stayed silent, waiting. [I can’t put it into words, it’s too hard. But I want you to know, I always have, I just couldn’t...I can show you, though. I can show you my memories.]

Bill hesitated. Here it was, all the things he ever wanted to know about her, offered to him on a plate, and yet…he wasn’t sure he wanted to know anymore. Severus’ explanations had been bad enough. He wasn’t sure what was worse. Her not showing him and having to live with his own imaginings? Or her letting him see everything and having to watch what had been done to her?

[Are the memories bad?] he asked.

[I don’t know. I lived them, so I’m pretty much used to them. Some of them are bad. I don’t know what you’ll think, your parents love you. If you don’t want to see them, I can keep them hidden,] she offered.

[I’m not sure what’s worse, what is real or what I imagine,] he admitted.

She was silent, waiting and he could feel her hurt through the connection. It was stronger now, almost as if the last few weeks had never happened. 

[Are you sure you want to show me?] he asked, making up his mind. He would rather know than wonder.

[Yes. I’m ready to now. If you want me to share it, I can now.] She smiled at him in his mind. [I love you, Bill, don’t you love me too?]

He laughed out loud, the ache that had seemed to take up permanent residence in his chest disappearing as she asked the oh so familiar question.

[I love you, Arin. All my heart and soul.]

She mentally giggled. 

[I want to see, but not now. I want to see when we’re together,] he said.

[Okay.]

[When we’ve made up properly…] he said lewdly and he could feel her blush.

[I like that plan. I’ll be home tomorrow. I’m going to close the connection now, while I sleep.]

[All right. I’ll see you tomorrow.]

[Goodnight,] she whispered sleepily.

[Goodnight.]

And with that she was gone. Bill fell back onto his pillow and fell into the first night of actual sleep he had had in a long time.

They were going to be okay. They were together.

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Severus looked up from his breakfast to see Solarin floo in with Moody close behind her. She locked eyes with him and he stood up, making his way over to her. Every eye in the full room was on the two of them, waiting.

“I’m sorry,” she said gently, her eyes downcast, obviously embarrassed of her behaviour. “I shouldn’t have gone off at you like that. You didn’t deserve it. You were only trying to help. I’m sorry, Sevus.”

He pulled her into his arms. “It’s all right. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you that I had informed him,” he said softly.

“So, I guess were both sorry, huh?”

“And that makes us both forgiven,” Severus said and she smiled. She pulled back and kissed him on the cheek. “I am glad that you didn’t land me in the hospital this time, though.”

“I could still choose to do that,” she said lightly, winking at him. Just like that, it was all forgotten. The two of them were like that, fought like cat and dog and yet all it took was one little apology and it was all ancient history.

Severus smirked and returned to his breakfast. He dropped his fork as Bill embraced her tightly, the two of them smiling at each other. He leaned in to Harry. “Did I miss something?” he asked his husband, confusion and disbelief written across his face as the two of them kissed as if nothing had ever happened between them.

Harry smiled at him. “The connection,” Harry supplied, taking a bite of his bagel. Harry, for once, had his hands free. Sirius was holding Miri, talking to her, giving Harry the chance to actually use both hands to eat. Remus was looking uncertainly at the little girl. Remus looked exhausted, but had insisted joining them all for breakfast. It was the day of the waning moon, the third and final day that he would be forced to transform come moonrise. The change took it’s toll on Remus’ human body.

“Ah. I forgot about that,” Severus admitted.

“Understandable. You thought she’d be gone for a few days. She didn’t even do 24 hours. You’re just too busy being relieved that she didn’t render you unconscious yesterday,” Harry joked.

“You know me so well,” Severus muttered, nibbling the ear he had been whispering into. Harry shivered.

“Severus?”

“Yes?”

“How long is it now since I had Miri?” Harry asked and Severus pulled away. His brow furrowed in concentration. 

“Seven weeks. You and Hermione were eight weeks apart in your estimated due dates and she reached a week remaining yesterday. Why?” Severus asked him interestedly.

Harry leaned close and kissed him, slipping his lips down to rest by his ear.

“Because I’ve stopped bleeding,” Harry whispered.

Severus pulled back and gazed into those green eyes that took his breath away. Harry was smiling shyly. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, I stopped a few days ago. I was waiting to tell you so I could be sure I had truly stopped. And I’m not sore anymore.”

God, Severus had lost track of how long it had been since they had last made love. Harry giving birth and a brand new baby had claimed their attention. He hadn’t even touched himself since Harry delivered. He had attempted it, once, but it had felt wrong. He knew his pleasure belonged to his husband and him alone. It was not something he was familiar with in a nice sense. When he had been a slave of Voldemort, he had known that he was only allowed pleasure at the Dark Lord’s discretion. To now know that he only wanted to gain his pleasure for Harry to enjoy had confused him at first, but now he was relaxed with it. He was the sole giver of Harry’s pleasure, it seemed only fair that his belonged to Harry.

More than a month had passed since they had enjoyed each other, he was sure of that. He had a suspicion it wasn’t more than two, but he couldn’t be positive. He had missed it, and he knew Harry had too, Harry had told him that. The mere thought of it, of being able to show Harry how much he loved him, of being able to pleasure him, of hearing those breathy cries once more. It made him begin to remember their first time, it made him think about pale skin under his hands, it made him want to pull Harry upstairs right that second…it made him hard. Christ, he was sitting at the breakfast table with a tent in his trousers. And Harry’s hand on his thigh as he leaned close was not helping. He was behaving no better than a hormonal teenager.

“The last time was…” Severus pondered out loud. It was a little hard for him to concentrate as he was trying to will his erection away.

“The kitchen counter, two weeks before I had Miri. So that makes it nine weeks,” Harry supplied, offering that shy smile again.

“Has it really been that long?” Severus asked in surprise and Harry giggled softly. Before their abstinence because of Harry’s discomfort and then the after effects of a difficult birth, they had made love daily. Several times daily. Severus hadn’t realised it had truly been more than two months. 

“Yes. So, can we? Tonight?” Harry asked.

Severus considered it. “I’ll have to examine you, love. Just to make sure you are indeed healed properly,” Severus admitted, managing to hide his regret at the thought of maybe having to wait any longer, and Harry nodded, though his eyes were a little disappointed. “If you are, then we can.”

Harry grinned at him and Severus pulled him in for a sweet kiss, full of promises of later.

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Solarin perched on Bill’s lap during lunch, and she couldn’t in all good conscience say she minded. It felt good to be like this with him again, so she wasn’t about to complain. No one had seemed to mind, not even Severus. Molly had even smiled at them fondly as they fed each other.

After lunch, Remus brought down the papers they had on Lucius and they started to go through them, the other members of the house offering their suggestions as they discussed options. Solarin and Remus had decided that maybe brainstorming with the group may help them piece it all together. So far, it wasn’t really working. It didn’t help that half the information they needed they were unable to get hold of. It made the jigsaw a little more difficult.

She remained on Bill’s lap as he didn’t seem inclined to let go of her any time soon.

“So, you’ve managed to gather that there are dowries involved?” Arthur asked.

“Yes. According to this,” she said as she held up a few pieces of parchment. “It says that if a male Malfoy heir marries then the bride’s family must provide a dowry. That dowry goes into the Malfoy vaults. Now, if a female Malfoy heir marries then the current Lord Malfoy at that point must pay a dowry to the bride’s family.” She looked at their confused faces. “For example, if Draco marries Pansy, her father pays Lucius a sum of money, that’s what a dowry usually is: money. If Draco had a sister that Lucius had claim over, then it would be the other way around. If she married, Lucius would have to pay his father a dowry. Everyone with me?”

They all nodded.

“There is something odd though,” Remus said. “The Malfoy vaults seem to be empty.”

“Empty?” Draco asked.

“Yes. There is nothing in them. Well, almost nothing. According to this statement, dated about a year ago, there is less than one hundred galleons, spread across the five vaults. There are no valuables, no jewellery. It seems odd.”

“Very odd. My mother used to splash money around like it was going out of fashion,” Draco supplied. “And my father paid a hell of a lot to keep himself out of Azkaban. I know that my grandfather had a gambling problem, but it’s never really been spoken of in any great detail, so I always assumed that it was a small thing.”

“It might explain the lack of funds. A gambler never really realizes that they’re in trouble until they’re in too deep.” Solarin peered at Draco and then down at the papers. “Have you had any luck getting your mother to talk to us?” she asked the blonde.

“No. All my letters keep getting sent back unopened. I don’t think she’s going to help us,” Draco said sadly, looking down at the table and picking at the wood with his nails.

Charlie leaned in and rested his head on Draco’s shoulder. Draco was perched on Charlie’s lap, the redhead describing things to him. “I’m hugging you, resting my head on your shoulder,” Charlie muttered and Draco nodded, smiling briefly at him.

Solarin smiled fondly at them, but she did give Charlie a warning look. The dragon tamer grinned cheekily at her. She really had become very motherly over Draco since his father took everything. “Is it me, or does it feel like we’re missing something?” she asked.

“Well, Miri was supposed to be a boy, right?” Harry asked. 

“Yes. She’s a little miracle,” Remus said, making Harry smile briefly.

“Well, if she had been a boy, and Lucius had managed to keep me, couldn’t he have collected the dowry from the bride if Miri married?” 

“Yes.”

“Wouldn’t that have brought him more money?”

Solarin laughed. “No way. This whole thing can’t be about money. That’s too simple,” she said incredulously.

“Perhaps you should be looking at the simple. Perhaps we all should,” Severus suggested as he paced with Miri. The tiny girl had trapped wind and he was trying to ease her. She was whimpering and wriggling in his arms and he held her over his shoulder, patting her back. She burped and Severus smiled. “That’s daddy’s girl,” he praised. She babbled as he sat down with her, sitting her on the table, her back against his chest. Her bright eyes darted around them as Severus bounced her hands on her legs.

“So this could all be about money? What he did to Harry could all be about money?” Ron asked disbelievingly, his voice tinged with rising anger.

Harry looked up at the tone. He was sat with Hermione between his legs, the two of them straddling a low bench, Harry massaging her sore back. She had insisted that he did it, and he had agreed immediately. He saw it as his way to thank her for the ice pack suggestion that had eased his suffering so well.

“Calm down, Ron,” Harry soothed, hoping to placate his friend. He knew Ron was still feeling guilty. Over what he couldn’t be certain, though. There were several possibilities. There was him telling Severus about his periods, and the wedding going ahead without Harry at everyone’s insistence for a happy day to ease their worries, or it might have been because Ron was suddenly living at Grimmauld Place. Hermione had told him that Ron felt like he was intruding or something. Ron’s guilt, whatever it was about at that particular moment, made him very protective over Harry and Miri. It would have been sweet if it didn’t lead to outbursts so often.

“Calm down? That bastard did bad things to you and it might be about money! I can’t calm down!” Ron argued. It briefly amused Harry that Ron referred to his imprisonment as ‘bad things’. He thought he was the only one who referred to his imprisonment as that. It was quite a nice way of putting it.

“Ron, look at it this way. If he hadn’t done bad things to me I wouldn’t have Miri. And I probably never would have worked up the nerve to tell Severus how I felt. So, really, when you look at it in terms of all the good things I have now, I can’t really hate him. Without his bad things I wouldn’t have the good things,” Harry reasoned. He knew he was lying, and he knew by the look that Severus was giving him that he knew it too, but he didn’t know what else to say to pacify Ron. He hated Lucius, no matter how much he loved Miri and Severus, no matter how thankful he was for all the good things in his life. In his mind, Lucius had done nothing good for him. In his mind, Miri was Severus’ daughter. He hated Lucius, no matter what he said.

But it seemed to work. Ron quieted and they went back to discussing what the missing piece might be.

“I think we’re getting off the subject. We’re trying to figure out what’s wrong with Draco, not how Miri came to be,” Sirius said firmly, staring down at the little girl reaching forwards, apparently trying to get to the salt shaker without success. She was definitely an inquisitive little witch. She couldn’t even hold her own head up properly yet. They could all see that he didn’t like discussing Miri’s conception and immediately latched on to the suggested way of thinking.

“It could be that, that Lucius wanted more money, but I don’t see how that connects to Draco’s symptoms,” Solarin said. “If only I could remember where I’ve seen a mind like his before this would be so much easier.”

“Still no luck?” Molly asked.

“No. The most I can get is that I was at Hogwarts when I did it and that I only saw it at a glance.”

“Why doesn’t that help?” Draco asked. 

“Because I glanced a lot of minds at Hogwarts. It could be anyone I went to school with,” Solarin explained. “I can say one thing for sure, though. The magical signature on the wall is not Voldemort’s.”

They all stared at her in surprise, a few of them shuddering at the name. “How do you know?” Sirius asked.

“Because she can only identify magical signatures she has encountered before, wizards and witches she has met. She never met, as Harry calls him, the Snake King,” Severus supplied, gripping Miri more securely as she pitched forwards.

They all sniggered. “Well, that’s a plus, right?” Charlie asked. 

“Definitely a plus, but it doesn’t really help us much,” Remus supplied.

“Maybe you could try letting someone into your head,” Harry suggested, attacking a particularly knotted spot on Hermione’s back. “Maybe if someone else could see the mind you kind of remember they might know who it is.”

“It’s a nice idea, Harry, but it wouldn’t work. No one could recognise what I see when I’m in someone’s head. I’m the only one who can do what I do. To anyone else, a mind would make no sense. I tried bringing Bill with me into a mind once. All he saw was a rush of colour,” Solarin explained. “It was a good idea in theory though.”

They all continued to toss around theories until Tonks flooed in with the Twins. The three of them were supposed to be helping with the decorating of the room next to Ron and Hermione’s. They were converting it into a nursery for Hermione’s baby. They were due to start decorating tomorrow morning and the three newcomers had opted to stay for the night. They were all hankering for Molly’s cooking and wanted to fuss over Miri.

As soon as Tonks entered the kitchen, Solarin jumped up and slapped a hand to her head. They all stared at her, wondering if she had gone insane, and Miri giggled. 

“Oh my God!” she screamed. “It’s Tonks!”

“I’m happy to see you too, Solly, but I don’t think it merits such an excited response,” Tonks said.

They all laughed and Solarin grabbed Bill’s arm. “No! The mind like Draco’s, it’s Tonks!”

They all gaped at her. “Are you sure?” Remus asked.

“Yes. When we did the McGonagall prank, I glanced into her mind. There was a wall in it, just like in Draco’s. Severus was right, it is so simple that we completely overlooked it. It’s a concealment!” she explained.

“Are you saying that what’s wrong with me is a spell?” Draco said.

“Yes. What Tonks does is simply a concealment. It’s a really good one, one that no one could do but a metamorphmagus. But in principle it’s just a concealment,” Solarin clarified. “Draco is under a concealment charm. That’s what the symptoms are. If I’m right, then it’s all falling into place. No concealment charm is meant to be left in place for more than a year, two at the most. The wall in Draco’s mind has been there more than a decade, nearly two. It all fits. Theoretically, if a concealment charm were to be left in place as long as Draco’s had then it would start to cause physical problems for him.”

They all gaped at her. Could it be true? Could it be that simple? Could it be rectified?

“You could fix me?” Draco asked in a timid whisper. His eyes were wide and pleading, but there was fear there as well.

“If I’m right, we could fix you. All it would take is one little potion,” Solarin said.

A small tear slid down Draco’s face. He could be fixed. It could all be over.

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Bill rolled over to find himself alone in bed. Thinking he had dreamed of Solarin and he making things up he shot to his feet, naked, looking around frantically.

[Window seat…] came the teasing amused voice into his head and he spun around, finding her watching him, smirking. She was wrapped in only a bed sheet, and there was a bright red love bite on her shoulder.

“Not funny,” he grumbled as he made his way over to her. She was smoking out of the window, the light of the full moon making her seem ethereal, her pale skin glowing.

“Remus’ howling keeping you up?” he asked lightly, settling himself opposite her and nicking one of her cigarettes.

“Sirius upped a silencing spell on the basement,” she reminded. Sirius and Remus had secured one of the basement rooms for Remus’ monthlies, as Sirius called them, and Remus had secluded himself in it just before the sun set. He would emerge just after sunrise.

“Oh, right. Why are you up?” he asked as she conjured a flame in the palm of her hand for him to light his cigarette on.

“I was thinking.”

“Want to talk about it?” he asked cautiously.

“I was thinking about my mother,” she said easily and he froze. She had actually said the word mother to him. She had never done that before. She had always referred to them as ‘my parents’. She held out an open locket to him and he noticed that she was surrounded by photographs and an empty photo album. None of the pictures moved. He briefly reminded himself that Solarin liked them still. She said it forced her to use her memory instead on relying on the moving image.

“Is this her?” he asked as he looked at the stationary picture contained in the antique piece of jewellery. The woman had Solarin’s face but light honey brown eyes, much lighter than Solarin’s ebony orbs. Her hair was curly and brown, a light honey brown. She looked sad.

“Yes. Eileen Prince-Snape. Severus gave me the locket the day of her funeral. It was hers. He has one just like it that belonged to her mother. I’ve always kept it with me, even at Hogwarts.”

“I remember. I asked you about it once and you said that it was a gift from your brother,” he said. They had been half naked and he had run his fingers over the ornate pattern. 

“I distracted you with a blow job,” she giggled. “You didn’t stand a chance.”

“Well, you knew just how to manipulate me. Still do,” he agreed, leaning in and kissing her, running his hands along her bare porcelain legs. She didn’t pull away and he felt it was a good sign.

She picked up another photograph and handed it to him. The man in it looked vaguely like Severus, but harder, colder. Even at his scariest as a professor, Severus had never seemed that cold. His black hair was short and his black eyes seemed empty.

“Tobias Snape, my father, the man who murdered my mother,” she said. Her tone was angry and Bill could understand it. “He died in prison when I was eleven. It’s how we got Spinners End. It was given to us when he died. That’s the only picture I have of him. I don’t think Severus has a single picture of him, but I’m not sure.”

She looked at him, her eyes careful, as she retrieved the picture, letting it flutter to the floor. “Do you still want to know?” she asked.

This was it, his moment of truth. Did he? He looked into her deep dark eyes and felt certainty settle in his chest.

“I want to know, but only if you still want to show me,” he said quietly. 

“I do,” she replied and he nodded. He felt her mind open to him, so that there was nothing between. They had under no circumstances ever dropped their barriers like this, not so they were completely bare. Not even in sleep or in their early days. He knew now that it had only been her reluctance to show him this that had kept them from becoming exposed. He nervously dropped his own barriers fully and gasped as the memories hit him.

She grabbed his cigarette as he pitched forwards and threw it out of the window with her own. She reached forwards and steadied him. He was panting and had broken out in a cold sweat. She held him as the memories flowed, and then closed her barriers as he received her last one.

He clutched at her and felt a sob make its way from his lips. God, the pain, the violence.

They all started to make sense in his head as they arranged themselves into some semblance of order.

She was eighteen months old, sitting in a living room, building a tower of bricks. Daddy was there, she wanted to play with him. He smelled bad, but he always did so she didn’t mind.

Solarin dropped her building block as her daddy advanced on her. He grabbed her arms and shook her, yelling that she was bad, that no baby should do things like that.

She didn’t understand. She wanted to play with him. Didn’t daddy like floating balls of light? Sevus liked them. 

She didn’t understand what she had done wrong, why daddy had left marks on her arms and made her ribs hurt.

“Oh God,” he gasped out as another hit him.

She was two and a half and she had wanted to help mummy and daddy clean up after dinner. Sevus had gone to get some milk from the shop.

Solarin took off at a run as daddy stormed at her. The bottle had fallen, she didn’t mean to. The ketchup spilled its way across the white table cloth. Mummy added water to it, it was hard to get out of the bottle. Daddy hit her hard around the face and her eye hurt.

She ran, and daddy followed. He was so angry. He smelled bad again. 

She fell and cut her knee. Sevus scooped her up and hid with her all night in the kitchen cupboard. That was how long it took for daddy to pass out. But her Sevus was there, holding her close. He cleaned up her knee and wiped away her tears. 

Sevus told her she was special.

“No,” Bill sobbed.

She was a baby, still in the crib. Her room had been pink.

She gazed up at the rabbits, they were spinning. She could hear shouting, and then it hurt. It hurt all over and she didn’t understand. Why did it hurt?

She was screaming. Screaming in that way babies have that make it seem like the world is ending. It hurt and it wasn’t hers. No doctor had given her a needle. Why did it hurt?

And then he was there, the boy with the dark hair, the one that smiled. Sevus, mummy had called him. He picked her up and he sung to her and she couldn’t hear the yelling anymore.

“Sick fuck!” he ground out through clenched teeth as the worst one yet hit him.

She was four and they were going on an adventure. They were going to get Sevus and they were going far away. Daddy wasn’t coming. No, it was just the three of them because they were special.

They were by the river and daddy came. Solarin hurt him because he hurt mummy, but she wasn’t big enough to stop him. He was hurting her, all over. 

And then mummy was on the ground, and daddy was holding a broken bottle.

“My babies are worth more to me than all the gold in Gringotts,” mummy said as she went to sleep and wouldn’t wake up.

Sevus hit daddy with his cast and daddy went into the river.

Sevus was carrying her away, and she was safe. He was her hero. He was her Sevus.

He breathed deep as the memories started to become easier, as they stated getting better. He only had to see one more, before she returned to his mind and pulled the brunt of them out. He only got one more clearly before she ended it.

She was ten and the Great Hall was so big. There were so many people, so many minds. It was like a party in her head. She sat down with her house and looked at the table in disgust. She could barely see over it. Her chin just rose above the wood. That wasn’t fair, everyone else could see over the table. They could even rest their elbows on it, though Sevus had taught her not to do that. One of the older girls helped her to sit on a big thick book, raising herself. She could reach the food now, even if her feet did dangle far from the ground. 

She glanced all around the room, seeing Sevus and Albus sitting at the head table, looking down upon her. Albus was smiling gently and Sevus looked proud of her. She smiled at them and peeked across the room. 

Fire.

That boys head was on fire. No, wait, it was his hair. And there was another one with that hair sitting just next to him. She had never seen hair that looked like fire. No one at Hogsmites had it. The other one had brown eyes and was short. But this one…his eyes were the brightest blue she had ever seen, and he was tall, like her Sevus. She could see it even though he was sitting down.

He was looking at her and she looked back. She focussed herself and peeked into his head. She knew she shouldn’t, but Sevus had told her that it was all right to be curious sometimes and it was just that one, just that boy.

‘She looks like a pretty porcelain doll.’

She smiled. He was thinking that he didn’t want her to get broken. 

He would be the one who she would make friends with, the nice boy with the kind eyes and the hair of fire.

He could feel her in his head, taking back the memories, leaving echoes of them behind. She put his barriers back for him as she receded. He opened his eyes and looked into her dark ones. Now he knew. He knew everything, and he knew why Severus was her number one. Severus would always be her number one. And he had been stupid to think that he could ever take his place as top dog in her affections. He could never save her the way Severus had. But she loved him. She had wanted him in her life since her very first day at Hogwarts. It was enough, it was everything he had ever needed. 

She was wiping his tears away, tears he hadn’t known he was crying.

“Are you all right?” she asked. She had not cried, but she looked sad.

“Yes. Are you?” he replied. She nodded. He didn’t question it further. Her memories had been so horrific to him. How could a father do that to his child?

“Now you know. Now you know everything and you know why I couldn’t tell you,” she said.

He leaned in and kissed her, deep and possessive.

[Mine. My porcelain doll. And I will never let you get broken.]

[Mine. My boy with the fire hair and the kind eyes.]

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Severus dried himself off from his shower and slipped into a pair of boxers. The thought of wearing anything more made him gasp. He didn’t even care about Sirius seeing him exposed. It was too damn hot. It wasn’t much cooler tonight than it had been during the day. Everyone in the house had walked around in vests and shorts, even Molly. He and Harry had been forced to dress Miri in nothing but a vest and to keep recasting cooling charms on her again. He hoped it would rain soon, that this heat wave would break.

He slipped into his room and stopped dead in the doorway. It was empty, and Miri’s basket was nowhere to be seen. He began to panic until he heard noises coming from Miri’s nursery.

He walked in to the dark room to see Harry standing by the crib, fiddling with an odd white device. It looked muggle.

“Harry? Where is Miri?” Severus asked and Harry shushed him.

He moved forwards at Harry’s beckoning and peered into the cot. Harry had placed the basket in it, and Miri was fast asleep, tucked up safely.

“Molly suggested that I put the basket in there with her. She said it would make it easier when it came time to move her in here properly,” Harry explained in a hushed whisper.

“Why are we trying it now? Miri doesn’t need to sleep in here for a few more weeks yet,” Severus asked.

Harry blushed. “I didn’t feel comfortable with the idea of her being in the room with us while we made love,” Harry mumbled. Severus smiled and kissed him. “I mean, I know we did it while I was pregnant, so she was technically in the room, but…”

Severus stopped him. “It’s all right, love. I understand. What is that odd thing in your hands?”

“It’s a baby monitor. The other one is in our room. Miri only whimpers, she never cries. With the baby monitor we can hear if she wakes up. Hermione had two, Ron went a bit mad when shopping, and she gave us one. Arthur messed with it for us. He charmed it to work without electricity,” Harry clarified.

Severus nodded and watched Miri sleep while Harry switched the monitor on and placed it on the chest of drawers. Harry entwined their fingers and led Severus from the nursery, led him to their room.

Harry lit a few candles on the chest of drawers before moving to the bed. He pulled Severus down and pinned him to the mattress, claiming his lips in a fiery kiss, their tongues duelling. Severus moaned, his hands playing along Harry’s back as he straddled him.

“Oh, Harry,” he breathed as Harry kissed at his throat. “Merlin, I’ve missed this.”

“Me too,” Harry replied. He stopped and looked Severus in the eye. “I want you to claim me. I want you to so badly.”

Severus smiled at Harry’s needy tone. “I want to, love, but I must examine you first. We need to be sure, Harry.”

Harry nodded and shed his boxers, laying back, nude except his bra. Severus couldn’t help it, he leaned forwards and kissed Harry’s shoulder, caressing his skin. Harry shivered. He pulled back and reached for the nightstand, pulling out the tube of lubricant. He looked at Harry in question and Harry nodded. He coated his fingers and smirked as Harry spread his legs wide for him; Harry was so eager.

Harry was already half hard, and it made Severus want to sink into that beautiful body once again, to make Harry cry out in desire. But he would never hurt Harry, so they had to be sure. He carefully eased his finger into Harry and felt his heart drop as Harry hissed and pulled away in pain. He sighed and removed his finger. They would not be joining tonight.

“Sorry, Severus, I know you wanted to tonight, and I got your hopes up. I thought I wasn’t sore anymore. It doesn’t hurt when I walk and sit down. Why does it hurt when you touch me?” Harry asked, disappointed.

“Because you are still healing. It’s all right, love. We’ll just have to wait a bit longer,” Severus soothed, using his wand to clean his hand. He crawled up and kissed Harry, trying to make him feel better. “It’s all right, I can wait. I won’t cause you any pain, so I will happily wait until you are ready. There is no rush, love, never any rush.”

“But I wanted it tonight. It’s not fair,” Harry complained, pouting.

“Sorry, love. We can’t, not while you’re this sore. I only eased one finger into you. Imagine how well you would handle my penis,” Severus reasoned. Harry huffed but he nodded. They lay there together for a while before Harry spoke once more.

“Can we do other things? I’ve stopped bleeding, so we can do other things, right?” Harry asked hopefully.

“We can,” Severus said with a grin. “Are you referring to what we did the morning after I claimed you?”

“Yes. And when I watched you touch yourself. And…” Harry trailed off.

Severus stayed silent, gazing into bright green eyes, waiting for Harry to tell him what he wanted.

“The first time, when you claimed me the first time, you asked if I wanted you to pleasure me with your hands or your mouth. What did you mean by your mouth?” 

“I was referring to oral sex.”

Harry’s brow knitted in concentration. “Is that like what Dean and Seamus used to talk about?”

“What did they talk about?”

“They talked about something called giving head.”

Severus smiled. “Yes, it can also be referred to as giving head. It has many names. When performed on a man, it’s proper name is fellatio,” Severus clarified. It amused him, Harry’s innocence, and filled him with pride. He was the only one to have made Harry feel good, to make him moan and gasp in pleasure. It made him feel proud of himself. He adored watching Harry enjoy himself in the bedroom. Well, wherever Harry asked for it really. It entranced him that Harry would only ask him what these sexual things were, he knew that Harry would never ask anyone else. Harry kept it between them, private and wholly theirs.

“So, what is it? How do you pleasure someone with your mouth? I don’t understand,” Harry asked. He showed no hint of embarrassment at his lack of knowledge, he never did when he asked Severus about sex. Severus would explain, he wouldn’t ridicule the way his friends had teased Neville when he didn’t know.

“Well, oral sex is when you use your mouth to stimulate your partners genitals,” Severus explained carefully.

Harry’s face darkened. “Like what he did to me, when he forced it down my throat?” Harry whispered.

Severus kissed his cheek, holding him close. Severus knew not to get upset when Harry mentioned his rape, it was, after all, the only other sexual experiences he had apart from the ones he shared with Severus. It made sense that Harry would try and figure it out with what he already knew. Even if it did make Severus want to castrate Lucius.

“Kind of, Harry. It’s not meant to be like that, though,” Severus agreed. “It is meant to be a consensual experience, a nice one.”

Harry was silent and Severus didn’t push him. He just lay there with Harry cradled against his chest, waiting.

“Do I have to do it to you if I ask you to do it to me?” Harry whispered.

“No. Not at all. Not if it is something you are uncomfortable with,” Severus reassured.

“It’s enough for you to just have my hand?”

Severus pulled him away and looked deep into the emerald eyes filled with uncertainty. “Harry, whatever you want to give me tonight is up to you. If you don’t want to do anything, I understand. It is enough for me just to have you here with me. Everything else is an additional benefit,” Severus said, his voice firm but gentle. He gazed into the searching eyes and willed Harry to understand that he meant every word.

Harry nodded and kissed Severus, deep and scorching, letting Severus know he believed.

“Will you do it to me?” Harry asked against his lips.

“Is that what you want?”

“Yes. I want you to use your mouth.”

Severus smiled at him and kissed him again, rolling Harry to his back. He kissed Harry slowly, possessively, driving away any thought of Lucius with his lips. He nibbled on his bottom lip, making him squirm and tighten his fingers in his hair. Severus kissed his way down the smooth pale column of Harry’s throat, licking his pulse, sucking at his slight Adam’s apple. 

“Severus, more,” Harry moaned, making Severus moan in response. God, he had missed that pretty plea.

He continued down, scraping his teeth along a shoulder, ghosting fingers over his breastbone. He was careful not to touch Harry’s breasts, they were still tender. In light of not being able to devote himself to them, Severus kissed Harry’s ribs, making Harry giggle. Severus looked up in surprise.

“It is just this one rib that’s ticklish?” Severus asked, barely managing to hide his smile of delight. He tickled the rib.

“Yes,” Harry admitted, squirming and giggling.

Severus grinned, stilling his teasing fingers. “I can’t believe I’ve only just discovered that. I thought it was all of them. You’re just full of surprises, my sweet little Gryffindor.”

Harry grinned at him and Severus returned to his exploration of the pale skin beneath him. He had to admit, he wasn’t quite sure how to pleasure Harry orally. Harry had both male and female genitals, and he only had one mouth. He decided to figure it out when he got to it.

He kissed his way down the flat stomach, caressing the slight curves with his fingertips. They were easy to miss if you didn’t know what Harry was. Actually, you could miss the curves if he was wearing clothes. But Severus knew. And he knew how much Harry loved gentle caresses over them. Harry moaned, arching his back to push his stomach towards Severus. Severus grinned and dipped his tongue into Harry’s navel, making Harry gasp.

“Do you like that?” Severus asked and Harry nodded. “Would you like more?”

“Please,” Harry replied. He knew Severus was teasing him, he always did when Lucius was mentioned in the bedroom, and Harry revelled in it. It made his mind turn off, made him forget that little bit faster. Severus dipped his tongue again and Harry just couldn’t think. All he could do was feel.

Severus carefully pushed the thin thighs apart and settled himself between them on his stomach. His feet dangled off the end of the bed but he didn’t mind. He had wanted to taste Harry for so long. It was finally his chance.

Harry was rock hard now, his erection jutting out proudly and Severus stroked the inside of his thighs as he figured out how to do this. He licked the tip of it and Harry cried out in surprise. 

“Are you sure you want me to do this?” Severus asked.

“Yes,” Harry breathed. “Oh please, Severus. Please.”

Good answer, but Severus knew Harry wasn’t quite as needy as he usually got. Not yet. He hadn’t said it.

Severus licked a slow steady strip along the underside of Harry’s cock before taking his head into his mouth and his hips bucked. Severus chuckled and moved a hand to Harry’s lower abdomen, holding him down for the time being.

Severus scraped his teeth lightly against the sensitive skin and Harry attempted to buck once more, growling at the restrictions. Severus pulled back and stared up at his lover. His lithe body was practically glowing with the light sheen of sweat, and his head was thrown back in pleasure, his hands raking through his hair. His full, kiss swollen lips were parted in wonder at the new experience. Beautiful, so beautiful.

Severus considered the task at hand. Harry was incredibly sore still, so he would have to avoid teasing his entrance. He smiled as it clicked in his head, the appropriate way to make Harry scream in pleasure, and Severus set about his feast like a man on a mission.

He sucked the head, swirling his tongue around it. Harry’s hands came down to tangle in his hair. He took his sweet time, slowly taking more and more of Harry in, the fingers tightening.

It hit the back of his throat and he growled. There were still inches left, far too much for him to take in, even if he did have Harry slide down his throat. He had known Harry was well endowed but he hadn’t quite factored that in when he had considered how to do this. Harry’s size in his male genitalia was a sign of his fertility in his female counterpart. From Harry’s length and girth, Harry was very very fertile indeed. Harry cried out at the growl, the vibrations going straight through him, and Severus knew exactly what to do.

Harry couldn’t think, he just couldn’t. All he could do was feel the wet heat around him. His fingers tangled in Severus’ silky hair and he knew his fingers were tightening, but he couldn’t help it. It just felt so good. When Lucius had forced him, he had never imagined that this could feel good. It had just been brutal. When Lucius had forced himself down Harry’s throat all he could think about was not passing out, how soon it would end. Now all he knew was the sinfully delicious moist heat surrounding him, the pressure of the wonderful mouth sucking, the dance of that wicked tongue. He could feel Severus’ tongue on him, stroking the underside. He tried to buck at the feel of teeth again, scraping ever so gently along him, but he couldn’t, Severus’ hand stopped him. He growled in frustration and then cried out as Severus hummed once more. It was ecstasy.

“Please, Severus, I need it,” Harry cried, and Severus felt his heart leap. There it was, that one innocent little sentence that let him know that Harry was at that point, that point when he was at his most desperate, that he was hanging on the edge and only needed one little thing to tip him over. He was aware that Harry found it slightly embarrassing that he always uttered the same sentence, but Severus prized it. He was the only one who got to hear it.

Harry knew he had said it, he couldn’t help it. He needed it, needed it so very badly.

And then, there it was. A skilled finger, angled perfectly, rubbing him on that bit. That bit that felt so good, the bit that always sent him over the edge. And this time was no different. His world exploded in a flash of light and heat and bliss.

Severus watched as Harry stiffened, as he cried out Severus’ name. God, he had missed that. Even if he didn’t get a turn tonight he would be happy, seeing Harry enjoy such satisfaction was enough. He felt the release fill his mouth and he swallowed, taking it all. Harry tasted sweet, and a little bitter, just the way he had imagined. It was like ambrosia. A gift from above. He waited until Harry collapsed, spent, on the bed before he released him from his lips. He licked them and crawled up the bed, gathering Harry into his arms, kissing his neck as Harry rode out the last of his tremors, clutching at Severus’ arms.

“Severus?” Harry asked when he regained some semblance of sanity.

“Right here, Harry. I’m right here,” Severus replied, nuzzling his neck. 

“Severus? What is that bit that feels good?” Harry enquired, remembering how Severus had sent him spiralling into explosions of paradise.

“What bit?” Severus questioned. Harry had a lot of bits that felt good. 

“The one you touched when I called out to you that I needed it, the one that feels really good when you touch it.”

“Oh, that bit. That is your clitoris, Harry. It is part of your female anatomy.” He took Harry’s hand and guided it down, leading Harry’s fingers to the fleshy nub. Harry jerked as his fingers brushed it. 

“It feels so good.” Harry pulled his hand back and entwined his fingers with Severus’. “I like that bit,” Harry said simply, making Severus chuckle.

“Indeed. Did you enjoy yourself?”

Harry grinned. “Yes. That was amazing. I never thought it could be so good. Thank you.”

Severus chortled. “You’re welcome. I enjoyed it too.”

Harry twisted in his arms and looked him in the eye. “Really? But you didn’t come,” Harry asked in surprise.

“I love watching you enjoy my touch, I adore watching you find your pleasure,” Severus explained. “I like knowing that no one has ever made you feel this good but me. I know it’s a little arrogant of me, but I feel proud knowing that I make you feel this way, me and no other. I could watch you forever.”

Harry smiled through his blush. “You like watching me that much?” he asked shyly. Severus nodded, kissing the tip of his nose and then his scar, just the way he liked.

Harry loved these moments, when Severus would hold him like this. Harry knew that he would never love anyone like he loved his husband. Harry giggled.

“What?” Severus asked.

Harry had to stifle his laughter. “Nothing. It’s just…I never imagined loving you like this. You were my least favourite teacher. And now we’re married. And I love you more than anyone else in the world.” Harry’s brow furrowed in confusion. “Well, except Miri. But I love her differently than I love you…I love her more than anyone too. Am I making any kind of sense right now?”

Severus kissed him, and Harry could taste himself on his husbands lips. “Yes, Harry. I understand you perfectly. I love you, too. I will admit, when you arrived at Hogwarts, I under no circumstances envisioned that I would love you. I would not have imagined starting something with one of my students, either. However, I can honestly say that I have never been happier, and I am rather glad I broke the rules.” Severus kissed him deep, his tongue coming out to swipe across that kiss swollen bottom lip.

“Why do you taste different?” Harry asked, intrigued by Severus’ new flavour. He hadn’t tasted like that before.

Severus chuckled. “You came in my mouth, love. I taste of your release because I swallowed it. I chose to swallow, but it is not a requirement of the act,” Severus explained. 

“Oh. It’s not weird that I taste myself, is it?” Harry asked.

“No. It’s part of fellatio. Does it bother you?”

“No...I don’t think so. It’s just different, I guess.”

They lay there together for a while, kissing gently, exploring with their hands what they had longed for.

“Severus?” Harry asked as his husband ran his thumb over his bare hipbone.

“Yes, Harry?”

“Do you think I could do it?”

“Do what?”

“Pleasure you with my mouth.”

Severus froze. He hadn’t considered that Harry would want to pleasure him that way. The thought of it made him painfully hard, but then his imagination kicked in, and all he could picture was his sweet Harry being forced to perform fellatio by Lucius.

“I didn’t think you would want to,” Severus said carefully.

Harry looked thoughtful. “I didn’t think I would want to either. But you did it to me…and it went okay…so…maybe it won’t be so bad…me doing it to you,” Harry reasoned.

“You don’t have to if you’re unsure,” Severus advised. “I would be satisfied by your hand if that is what you feel comfortable with. I want you to give me whatever you want to, Harry.”

“I’m not unsure,” Harry said with a smile. “I want to use my mouth…it’s just…”

Severus ran his thumb over one impossibly high cheekbone. Harry really was breathtaking, and he adored every inch of him, tender heart, beautiful body and loving soul.

“I don’t know how to do it to you,” Harry admitted and Severus smiled.

“I can talk you through it, if you want to do it,” Severus offered.

“Well, it’s only fair. You should get a turn too.”

Severus’ face turned serious and he gazed into the captivating eyes. “Harry, forget about fair. There are other ways for you to pleasure me. If you don’t want to do this then it is perfectly all right. I will never force you into anything you are not completely sure about.”

“I know that,” Harry said and kissed him, sweet and gentle. “I know you’d never force me into anything. It’s one of the many things I love you for.” Severus smiled at him and kissed his scar again. “I want to do it. I want to make you feel as good as you made me feel. I want to do it,” Harry guaranteed.

Severus knew Harry was being honest with him, Harry had never lied to him about their enjoyment of each other. All his imaginings about Lucius had suddenly disappeared with Harry’s assurances. But something held him back still: he wasn’t sure if he could restrain himself.

“Harry…if you do this, I’m not sure I can keep a clear head while you give me this,” he admitted. “I don’t want to thrust and find that I have pushed my way down your throat, that I have pushed you too far without meaning to.”

Harry looked meditatively at him, his mind working through the haze of post orgasmic bliss to piece together what Severus had actually done. “I couldn’t buck. I tried but I couldn’t. How did you do that?” Harry asked.

“I put my hand on your stomach and I held you down.”

“Why don’t I hold you down, like you did to me? If I stop you, then you can’t push. But…you’re a lot stronger than me. So…how do I do that?” Harry asked.

Severus considered it. Harry’s hands were too small to do what he had done. There was another way, though.

“You hold my hips. You hold them to the bed,” Severus replied.

“Both of my hands will be holding your hips, so I just use my mouth, right?” Harry asked, gaining confidence.

“Yes.”

“What do I do?” Harry asked, his innocence enticing Severus.

“You use your tongue and your lips. You can use your teeth. It has been that long since I was pleasured orally that I can’t remember what I like during fellatio. Just experiment. You’ll find out what I get pleasure from,” Severus hissed out as Harry reached down, slipping his hand inside his boxers, and began to stroke him.

“Do I have to swallow?” Harry asked as he nuzzled Severus’ neck, his hand moving slowly along Severus’ length.

“No. I will warn you when I’m about to come. If you don’t want to swallow, you can pull back, I won’t be offended. It is your choice,” Severus reassured, his mind clouded by the feel of Harry fondling his balls.

Harry kissed him once more before he pushed him to his back, stripping him of the black silk. Harry kissed his way down and paused above Severus’ penis, standing proudly from a nest of black curls. Harry reached out and ran his fingers through the coarse hair, Severus moaning. He bent forwards from his kneeling position and licked the white drop from the tip. Severus gasped.

It wasn’t so bad, Harry decided. Very salty, and a little bitter, but not so bad. He glanced up to find Severus watching him, waiting, his eyes communicating that he didn’t have to, that he could still say no, that he could change his mind at any time. Harry smiled at him and reached out to curl his hands around Severus’ hips.

“I hold you like this?” he asked.

“Just like that. When I push up, you push down to stop me,” Severus praised, his voice strained. Harry wriggled to get comfortable and Severus’ spread legs came up to cradle his arms.

Harry bent down and licked again, and he knew what Severus meant when he had said ‘held you down’. Severus tried to buck and Harry forced back against him. 

“Sorry, love,” Severus said softly and he looked up.

“Don’t apologise. I stopped you. And it means it feels good, right? Like when you twitch.”

“Yes, it is exactly like when I twitch.”

“Then just lie back and relax. I’m in control. I know that. Just relax,” Harry ordered. 

Severus smiled. “All right. But take your time, do not rush. You have all the time in the world, love. And if you want to pull back at any time, if you want to stop, do so. Do not force yourself for me,” Severus warned, gently.

Harry smiled at him and kissed his raised knee.

Harry looked at the hard member and strategized the best way to approach it. He couldn’t just swoop in, he knew that would be too much too fast. But the top didn’t look too scary. He focussed on that one bit. It was small, and it looked kind of sectioned off from the rest. He decided to start with that bit and he took it into his mouth. He let his tongue explore it.

His hands tightened and he pushed down as Severus tried to buck. The cock moved a few millimetres deeper into his mouth but not much. He kept pressing down as his tongue moved, Severus moaning. Obviously easing his pressure was not a good idea. 

The skin under his tongue was smooth and soft. It wasn’t so scary like this, he decided. He could taste that white drop again and he dipped his tongue into the slit, hearing Severus call his name in pleasure. He took it a little deeper, just a little, and found that he wasn’t gagging the way he had with Lucius. He found that this felt kind of good, making Severus feel this way. He kind of liked it.

He pulled up and began to suck slightly at the head. Severus’ fingers threaded through his hair, stroking so tenderly. How did Severus do that? Harry had nearly left the man bald. Well, it had felt that way when he was tugging.

“God, Harry!” Severus cried, breathless. “Just like that, love.”

Harry began to reply, until he remembered his mouth was occupied. It briefly hit him that Aunt Petunia had always told him not to talk with his mouth full, but Severus didn’t seem to mind it right then. In fact, Harry had to press down incredibly hard to keep Severus from bucking, the older man fair near screaming.

So Harry continued on like that, sucking and humming. Severus was babbling incoherently and Harry figured that his husband must have been close. He sucked harder and began to move up and down, taking more. He didn’t take a lot in, it didn’t once approach his throat and there were inches left uncovered, but Severus didn’t appear to mind.

Harry scraped his teeth oh so lightly along the hard flesh and that was it. Severus’ hands left his hair and gripped at the sheet, his hips attempted to surge upwards but were still restrained by Harry’s hands, and Severus called out to him.

“Now, Harry!” Severus called desperately, warning him. Harry only had a moment to make his decision but he found that he didn’t really have to think about it.

He pulled back sharply, pushing his body forwards so he was hovering over his husbands thrusting form, his hands coming to support him alongside Severus’ ribs, and Severus’ release landed on his stomach. 

Harry watched his husband as he panted and shook, and then crawled up the bed to lie beside him, waiting, feeling unsure. Severus came, so he must have enjoyed it, but he still felt filled by self doubt.

Severus’ breathing eventually returned to normal and his heart stopped pounding. He glanced down, but Harry was not between his legs anymore. He looked to the side and there he was, waiting. Severus smiled at him, rolled to his side and pulled him in for a kiss. Harry’s kiss didn’t taste any different, so he guessed that Harry had not swallowed.

Harry kissed him in return, but when they pulled back, Harry looked unsure of himself.

“What, love? Come on, you can tell me,” Severus urged. “Did you not like doing it?”

Harry shook his head. “It’s not that, I did kind of like it. It’s just…Was it…..was I……I mean…..”

“Were you good at it? Was it good for me? Did I enjoy it?” Severus supplied and Harry nodded. Severus smiled. “You were very good, Harry. And it was very good, I enjoyed it tremendously. It was perfect, love.”

“I didn’t swallow,” Harry admitted. “It landed on my stomach. Is that okay?”

“That is no problem. It was completely your choice to swallow or not. Are you all right?” Severus asked, worried by Harry’s sudden doubt. He performed a cleaning charm on his lover, removing the stickiness.

Harry nodded but Severus wasn’t convinced. “Harry,” he said as he pulled Harry onto his chest, rolling to his back and wrapping his arms around the slender frame. “You did want to do it, didn’t you? You didn’t rush yourself?”

“No, I wanted to do it. I didn’t rush,” Harry answered.

“Did you not like doing it? Are you trying to tell me that you don’t want to do it again? Because that is all right, Harry. You don’t have to do it again if you don’t want to.”

“No, it’s not that. I kind of enjoyed doing it. I don’t know if I want to again but I liked doing it…kind of.”

“Is it because I kept trying to buck? I didn’t push too far, did I?” Severus asked, running out of ideas as to what could be wrong. Harry didn’t seem to be forthcoming with an explanation of his sudden change in mood. If Harry had still been pregnant, Severus would have put it down to hormones. As he wasn’t, Severus knew that this was down to Lucius’ treatment of him. Maybe he shouldn’t have let Harry test himself, maybe it wasn’t a good idea after all.

“No, I stopped you, and I knew you’d try to. You told me you would. You didn’t go too far. It’s not that,” Harry replied. Harry wanted to tell him what was wrong, he just didn’t know how.

Severus pondered it. That only left one more thing. “Is it about you swallowing, Harry?” he asked gently and Harry nodded against his chest. “It’s all right, love. You didn’t have to.”

“But I wanted to,” Harry mumbled. “I wanted to do what you did but I couldn’t.”

Ah, Severus understood now. Lucius had made Harry swallow.

“Harry, look at me,” Severus commanded gently and the bright orbs fixed on his jet ones. “It is perfectly all right for you not to swallow. I understand why you couldn’t. Maybe next time you will be able to, but I am very proud of you for managing to actually go through with it.” He didn’t mention Lucius, or the last time Harry had performed oral against his will, he didn’t mention any point in time before he had begun sweeping away all the wrongs of Harry’s past with his touch. He was careful to keep his tone soothing, and the topic encouraging.

“You’re sure it doesn’t matter?” Harry asked, but Severus could tell the question was only a last token move of seeking comfort Severus always gave without question. Harry already believed him.

“Positive. Harry, not everyone swallows. Some pull back, like you did. It is a personal choice. I chose to remain still instead of pull back. It was what I wanted, Harry. You pulled back because you wanted to. It is absolutely acceptable,” Severus reassured

Harry relaxed against him and smiled shakily. “You’re sure it was good?” he asked shyly.

“Exquisite. I enjoyed it immensely,” Severus said immediately, smiling lustily.

Harry blushed and snuggled against him. Severus smoothed down the wayward hair without success, but he loved to try. Something about the wild raven strands just made his fingers itch.

“I didn’t pull too hard on your hair, did I?” Severus asked suddenly, remembering the way Harry had yanked at his. He felt ice in the pit of his stomach at the thought of hurting Harry, even by accident in the heat of passion.

“No. You didn’t pull it at all, actually. You yanked at the sheet,” Harry said sleepily.

Severus chuckled, the ice melting. He reminded himself that Harry’s hair was in dire need of a trim and made a mental note to ask Molly to do it. Severus knew from past experience with Solarin that he would not make his lover look good if he were to attempt the haircut. He and Harry kept forgetting and now it was hanging in his lovers eyes.

“Do you know what potion to make to help Draco?” Harry asked as Severus summoned their discarded boxers.

“Yes. It’s a simple potion. It’ll take a mere hour to brew. I will prepare it myself tomorrow after breakfast. Draco should be cured by this time tomorrow, if Sol is right,” Severus replied as they slipped on their underwear. Severus moved from the bed and cracked open the window, trying to entice the breeze. He slipped back into bed, pulling Harry into his arms, and sighed as the breeze did actually move over his skin. They settled the light sheet over themselves, more to soak up the sweat than actual covering, and snuggled down to try and get in a couple of hours sleep before Miri demanded their attention.

“I love you, Severus,” Harry muttered sleepily, settling further into Severus’ embrace, pushing back to be more firmly against the broad chest. It was hot and sweaty, but Harry couldn’t sleep without Severus holding him, inducing dreams of being carried far away, just the two of them.

“I love you, Harry,” Severus replied, kissing the back of his neck. He cast a cooling charm over them and sighed.

Severus felt exceedingly calm. Funny how things never stay calm for very long.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Bill slipped into the basement room that had been converted into Severus’ potions lab and leaned against the door, sighing in relief.

“No pacing people in here,” Bill explained at Severus’ questioning glance.

“Everything all right upstairs?” Severus asked, adding crushed butterfly wings.

“Bloody connection. Solarin keeps picking up all the tension and I keep getting what she does. I love your sister, but sometimes I wish she wasn’t quite so deep in my head,” Bill explained. He winced. “And that she’d remember bloody barriers when she’s stressed. She’s turned into a mother hen over that boy,” he grumbled, rubbing his temples.

Severus smirked. “Are the two of you all right now?” he asked offhandedly, adding armadillo bile.

Bill looked at him worriedly, as if he had walked in on Severus doing something very private. “We’re fine…Severus…umm…well…”

“Do spit it out, I do not bite,” Severus encouraged.

Bill took a deep breath. “Solarin showed me her memories. She showed me your father,” he admitted, watching Severus freeze momentarily. “I won’t tell anyone, I just thought you should know.”

“Thank you for the courtesy,” Severus whispered before his serenity returned. “I would ask you if you would like to help but I remember you as an abysmal brewer,” Severus said, adjusting the flame and stirring smoothly in a figure of eight.

“I never did get any better with it, so it’s probably better if I don’t help. I might accidentally poison him.” He laughed. “I’m not sure who would kill me first if I poisoned him. My money is on Solarin or Sirius, though Harry and Remus come a close second. Not quite sure where you’d come in the list, above or below Harry.”

Severus grinned and tried to get his mind off of the activities of the previous evening evoked by that simple innocent statement. “I will not be letting you help, so you will not be poisoning Draco anytime soon,” he said, grateful for the workbench that hid his arousal.

“Nice to know. Do you mind if I watch?”

Severus looked at him in question as he added three grams of camomile.

“I may be terrible at making my own, but there is something very soothing about watching someone else brew potions,” Bill explained.

“Very well. Just try not to touch anything.”

Bill perched himself on a free counter and observed Severus at work. It really wasn’t fair. When he made potions, he was all clumsy movements and mistakes. Only Solarin’s intervention had allowed him to pass his O.W.L.’s and N.E.W.T.’s. But the Snape siblings were naturals. They flowed with grace and ease. It was no wonder that Severus had become a Potions Master. It was like watching some kind of beautiful and complicated dance.

“It needs to simmer for twenty minutes before the asclepias tuberosa is added. I assume it is not safe to venture upstairs?” Severus asked.

“Definitely not. It’s like they’re all waiting for a bomb to go off or something.”

Severus smirked. “Very well.” 

He began to clean the workspace and Bill hopped down from his perch, lending a hand. Together they cleaned up and then stood in silence, watching the potion turn a bright crystalline orange. This one simple potion would be all that was needed to cure Draco of his symptoms, if Solarin was right. If not then it would be harmless to him. Everyone was apprehensive as to what might be lurking behind the concealment, but they knew it was for the best. Draco’s symptoms could not be left untreated, not now they were getting worse. The blonde was still numb, but he no longer enjoyed it as he had to begin with. Now it had begun to scare him. His fear had only increased when he had stood in the path of a lit candle and set himself alight. It wasn’t until Arthur had yelled out to him did he notice.

Severus moved forwards and added the asclepias tuberosa, stirring the potion in a clockwise motion. He added one counter clockwise stir and turned off the flame. He ladled some into a goblet and handed it to Bill.

“You can do the honours,” Severus said, pouring the rest of the potion into a labelled sterilised bottle and putting a stopper in, placing it on a shelf. He performed a cleaning charm on his cauldron and the two men made their way up to the kitchen, where everyone was gathered.

Remus looked exhausted, but had insisted being there when Draco took the mixture. Everyone had insisted. Draco was sitting between his parents, with Charlie off to his left and Harry to his right, holding Miri. Solarin was pacing with Molly and Tonks; the Twins were cracking their knuckles, Arthur telling them to stop at regular intervals; Albus, Ron, Hermione and Ginny were settled in chairs by the open window, enjoying the breeze. The sky was grey and ominous, and it only added to the anticipation. 

They all jumped as Severus and Bill entered the room. The curse breaker moved forwards and placed the steaming goblet in front of Draco.

“You need to drink it while it is still hot. It solidifies as it cools,” Severus instructed. “It will be disagreeable to tolerate, but you need to down it all. We should see a result immediately.” He paused. “Draco, if you have changed your mind and wish not to take it, it is all right.”

They all watched him, watched the way he eyed the goblet and reached out a shaking hand to grasp it. Sirius’ hand came out to hold his wrist to steady him, but Draco did not lift the goblet. He seemed to be making his mind up about whether or not to drink it. They all waited with baited breath.

“Close the damn connection!”

They all jumped and it was only Remus’ hand coming forwards to steady the glass that stopped Draco from spilling it. They looked at Bill accusingly.

“I’m sorry, but you’re all on edge and she can sense it and she’s passing it through the connection,” Bill explained.

Solarin looked sheepish as she muttered an apology and Bill smiled, kissing her temple. Harry got up from his seat and handed Miri to Ron. Draco needed him more than his daughter right now and she was in a good mood, she would be fine with Ron for a bit. Ron settled her on his lap and began to bounce her, Miri squealing in delight. Dumbledore tickled at her tummy and she attempted to grab his hand.

“Well, now that Bill has broken the tension, are you going to drink it?” Tonks asked Draco kindly.

The blonde nodded and lifted the goblet, taking a deep breath before gulping the whole thing in one go, not stopping until it was all down his throat. It seemed like it had taken a lot of effort to get it down. It must have tasted horrific, if Draco’s expression was anything to go by. Sirius took the goblet and set it down as Draco held his hands over his mouth, keeping it closed. He appeared to be attempting to not throw it back up.

“Deep breaths, Draco,” Remus urged, using a tissue to wipe away the sweat that had beaded on the pale forehead. After a few minutes, Draco stopped gagging and looked around.

“I don’t feel any different,” he said. He didn’t appear any different either. They all looked at Solarin.

But before anyone managed to ask anything of the confused augur, the room exploded. Remus, Sirius, Charlie and Harry were blasted out of their seats, bright orange smoke that smelled vaguely of cherries filling the room. Miri began to whimper. Severus darted forwards and checked Harry over, Molly doing the same with Charlie. Arthur and Bill moved to Remus and Sirius. They all seemed to be unharmed, only a little shaken. They all glanced around for Draco, but all they managed to see was a flash of blonde hair as he ran from the room. They heard the bathroom door slam down the hall.

“What happened?” Harry asked as Severus helped him to his feet. “What was that?”

“That would be the potion working, I think,” Remus supplied as Arthur settled him in his seat.

“Why the hell didn’t it work straight away?” Sirius asked, rubbing his bruised shoulder while his eyes scanned Remus’ form, checking he was all right.

“The concealment has been there a long time. It was probably a delayed reaction,” Molly put in.

Charlie’s expression was one of absolute panic. “Go,” Harry said and Charlie sped from the room. They could hear him knocking on the bathroom door, asking Draco to open it.

Harry retrieved his daughter from his friend and pushed Severus into a chair, settling himself into his lap. The strong slim arms came around them both and together the Potter-Snape’s soothed their daughter.

No one knew quite what to say or do. Nobody had any idea what Draco really did look like now, and Charlie didn’t seem to be having any luck getting through the door.

As everyone settled down to wait, the heavens opened and the heat wave broke.

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Lunch and dinner passed and still Draco had not come out of the bathroom. The early morning light began to fight its way through the rain and still Draco did not emerge. Harry eased himself from the bed and moved to Miri’s room, retrieving his gurgling baby from her crib. After she had slept so well in it, Harry and Severus had decided that maybe the time had come to have her sleep in her own room. So far, it was going well, and Miri had slept through from midnight till five am before needing another feed. 

Harry glanced into his bedroom, smiling at Severus wrapping around a pillow in his absence. His husband was worried that maybe he had done something wrong within the preparation of the potion and Harry had eventually had to force a sleeping draught down him to get him to actually settle. He knew Severus would be all right, he just needed to sleep in order to think straight.

Harry opened the first few buttons of his pyjama top and exposed one breast, the questing mouth latching on immediately. Harry could hear voices from below him and he walked downstairs while nursing, taking his time.

“What are you all doing up?” Harry asked as he entered the kitchen, Remus quickly shoving something into the bin.

The kitchen was full of people. Remus, Sirius, Arthur, Molly, Charlie and Solarin. They all looked tired and anxious.

“What makes you think we’ve gone to bed yet?” Charlie asked.

“Draco still not come out?” Harry asked as he settled in a chair. Sirius shook his head. “Have all of you given it a try?”

“Many times,” Remus replied. “He won’t talk to any of us.”

Miri detached and Harry covered himself, leaving his top unbuttoned, before putting her against his shoulder. 

“I shouldn’t have even suggested it. This is all my fault,” Solarin said miserably.

“Don’t blame yourself. Once he set himself on fire, we knew it needed to be done,” Harry argued as he rubbed the tiny back. “It was his choice to drink it. If it makes you feel any better, Severus is doing about as well as you are. He’s convinced he messed up somewhere with the potion. Kept rambling about butterfly wings and armadillo bile. I had to make him drink a sleeping draught to finally calm down. This is no one’s fault, and it was Draco’s choice. No one forced him to drink it.”

“But I’m the one that just couldn’t leave well enough alone. I kept chipping at it, determined to solve the puzzle. If I could just keep my nose out he wouldn’t be shut in the bathroom,” she reasoned. “I feel so stupid.”

She buried her head in her hands and sighed. Harry could see her tears hit the aged wood of the table. 

“I promised him I’d take care of him,” she whispered. Remus moved forwards and pulled her into a hug.

“You do take care of him,” Remus said certainly. “You do very well. Just give him time, he’ll come out when he’s ready.”

“Once again, you are the reasonable parent,” Sirius joked and Remus blushed. Solarin let out a shaky laugh. 

“One of you needs to be with two teenagers,” she teased. “And it’s definitely not you, Sirius.”

“Oi! I can be reasonable,” Sirius argued, grinning.

“Yeah right,” she scoffed. “You’re possessive and hot headed. Frankly, I don’t know how Remus puts up with you.” She was smiling now and Harry grinned with her.

“Oh, he has his perks,” Remus said lustily, eyeing Sirius suggestively.

“Please, parents! Me and Miri are far too young to have you do that while we’re in the room,” Harry interjected, sticking his tongue out in disgust. They chuckled at him, Remus somewhat embarrassed, as he drew Miri to his other breast to finish her feed.

“I must say, the two of you make wonderful parents,” Molly added, changing the subject from Sirius’ ‘perks’.

“Well, it’s taken us long enough to get the chance. And we have a lot of guidance so we don’t screw up too badly,” Remus said, kissing her on the cheek. “We really wouldn’t be doing very well without you and Arthur as an example.”

She blushed and Harry grinned. He knew how much his fathers had wanted to be parents, and he realized that he had gotten married not long after they adopted him. It must have been hard for them to watch him always turn to Severus first. Miri finished her feed and he buttoned himself up before standing. He moved round the table and gave her to Molly to wind. 

Sirius jumped as Harry hugged him, really hugged him. It was the first time he had done so since he was rescued. Sirius hesitated for a moment before he wrapped his arms around his godson, closing his eyes and savouring the moment. Much too soon for his liking, Harry slipped out of his hold and moved to hug Remus, the lycanthrope looking as stunned as he was.

Harry pulled back and looked between the two of them, blushing faintly. He wasn’t good with being open with his feelings with anyone but Severus, but he wanted them to know. 

“I know that it must be hard for the two of you…me being with Severus when you didn’t get along with him in school…and the age gap…and that he was my professor. Damn, this is coming out all wrong…” Harry trailed off. He took a deep breath and started again. “I just wanted to…umm…let you know that…er…well…I like having the two of you as my parents…and I think that you’re good at it.”

Remus and Sirius smiled at him and the three of them moved into a group hug, their little family almost complete. All except for one hiding blonde.

“I’m going to go and try talking to him,” Harry announced.

“You think you’ll have any luck?” Arthur asked. Charlie’s eyes were fixed on Harry, full of worry.

“He’s my brother now, that might count for something,” Harry said, shrugging his shoulders. “And he saved me. It’s time I tried to repay the favour. Do you mind watching Miri for me?”

Remus stared at the baby for a moment before reaching out and taking her from Molly, cuddling the sleepy infant close to the surprise of everyone.

“Of course not. She’s our first grandchild. We should help out,” Remus said. Sirius was stunned. Remus had never voluntarily held Miri, his initial reluctance over her biological father’s methods making it hard for him to accept her.

“Are you sure, Remus?” Harry asked uncertainly, completely taken off guard by the completely unexplained change in his adoptive father. “I know you’re a little reluctant with Miri. I can take her with me if you want.”

Remus looked at him, putting all the trust he could into his amber eyes. It finally hit him why he had so much trouble accepting the baby. Harry hadn’t really felt like his cub since he had returned. Harry’s hug had dispelled all of his old hesitations and his wolf was suddenly possessive over the tiny girl. She was in his pack, not Molly’s. He should hold her, not the Weasley woman.

“She’s part of my pack. You’re my cub and she’s your pup. I want cuddles for all the ones I’ve missed.” He saw Harry’s confusion. “When you hugged me, I suddenly felt like you were my cub again. My inner wolf knows that she’s not a threat, it knows that now. I’m fine with her now you calmed the beast,” Remus explained, seeing Harry’s smile. Sirius smiled at him too.

“All right then. I will leave my pup in your capable hands while I try and help your other cub,” Harry said with a smile, sticking with the pack speak. He felt he really should have remembered how soon it was after the full moon. 

He heard the calls of good luck as he left the room and padded down the hall. He knocked gently on the door and heard Draco moving inside. He thought he could make out sobs as well. 

“Draco? It’s Harry. Can I come in?” Harry called lightly. Silence and louder sobbing met him as his answer. He sighed and slid down the doorframe, getting comfortable on the floor. He knew exactly what to say to Draco, and, strangely, he didn’t feel apprehensive about it at all. “All right, I’ll stay out here and talk then. I hope you’re listening, because if you’re not then I’m just sitting here talking to myself, and that is never a good sign.” He paused, waiting to see if Draco would change his mind. The door remained closed and Harry began his reasoning. “You know, I always thought that I was just like everyone else. No one really let me in on the secret that I was different. But when I got to Hogwarts, I knew, right from the very first night in my bed. You must have had it as well, the boys in the dorm talking about sex.”

Harry paused and listened, waiting. More silence, but the sobs seemed to have faded. He could hear Draco sliding down the door to sit on the floor and listen to him.

“I knew that I was different then. I mean, if they were like me, they would talk about it, right? And, of course, Dean and Seamus were an item. Even in their first year they seemed to be together. They had these magazines with these pictures in them, adult ones, rude ones.” A snigger from the other side of the door. “Don’t laugh, I was only young,” Harry said with a smile. “I snuck a look at one of them one night when they were asleep. I was about twelve. The men in the magazine didn’t look like I did, none of them. There was this one, he was lying on his back, showing his…goods to the world. I saw everything he had in that one.” He sniggered at how embarrassed he had been, at how he had blushed. “I knew I was different then, knew for sure. And the showers being communal helped me realize it as well. But in my head I wasn’t really that different until my periods began. Did you know that I was at Hogwarts when they started?”

More silence, but Harry was positive that his brother was listening to him, so he continued.

“Yup, there I was one night, my third year, waking up in a pool of blood.” He laughed. “I thought I was dying. Such a barrel of laughs, I don’t think.” Another snigger from Draco. Laughing was a good sign. “But Ron helped me, he had a sister and a mother so he knew what it was. Well, kind of. Poor sod.” He heard Draco sigh. Harry knew he was thinking of how nasty he had been. “He figured out that I wasn’t just a boy. He helped me hide it, helped me deal with it.” Harry sighed, letting himself think back. “I hated what I was. I hated being different. I thought I was ugly and disgusting, that if people knew what I really was they’d think me repulsive. That they’d hate me,” he finished quietly.

Draco was moving against the door, Harry could hear him shifting. Maybe he was going to open it.

“What Lucius did to me didn’t help. But you did. You saved me. You didn’t look at me like I was some foul thing, you never have. You just look at me as Harry, just Harry, girly bits and all.” Another snorted laugh. Definitely good. “And then there was Severus. He showed me that I was wrong. You gave me that, you gave me my life back. You took me to Severus, not anyone else. And I will always love you for that. You gave up everything for me, and I’ll never forget that,” Harry promised and he heard Draco sniffing.

“And after all that, when it finally came time to face my family, to see them once they knew, I was terrified. But they never pulled away, not once.”

Draco was standing now, he was sure of it. He remained seated just in case he was wrong.

“Draco, this is our family, as weird as it is. As messed up and unconventional as our family is, they love us. None of us care what you look like. To us, you’re just…you. No matter what, we will still love you, we will still want you. We will never turn you away like Lucius did. You’ve got no choice now, you joined this mad house, there is no getting out of it. It’s like a life sentence.”

Draco laughed outright, though the laugh sounded slightly strange to Harry, and he stood up, facing the door. 

“I don’t care what you look like. You’ll still be the one who saved me, and we’ll still have the same adoptive parents. And we share Severus, and Solarin. And Miri. Maybe now you’re fixed you can hold her.” Harry paused, hearing Draco take a deep breath. It sounded hopeful. “Will you let me in now?” Harry asked. He waited and was rewarded with the lock clicking. He saw Charlie and Solarin poke their heads round the kitchen door and he shooed them away.

He opened the door and stepped inside, locking the door firmly behind him to keep them all out, before he looked at his brother.

Only…he wasn’t a brother.

Draco was a girl.

Harry’s jaw dropped. He tried to stop it but he couldn’t, there was no way he could stop his reaction. Of all the things he’d imagined, this was not one of them.

Draco was now an inch shorter than he was, and had a perfect hourglass figure. Gone were hard muscles, replaced instead by soft femininity. The previously pointed chin and strong jaw had softened. There wasn’t even a trace of the Adam’s apple. Draco was still blonde, but now…now it was pooling on the floor in its length. Terrified eyes looked at him from under long thick eyelashes, swimming with imminent tears.

“Draco, you’re…you’re…”

“A girl,” Draco said unsteadily. The blonde now had a soft light voice, almost sweet.

“I was going to say stunning, or maybe beautiful, but yours works too,” Harry said and he watched in amazement as Draco blushed as she laughed shakily.

“That was some potion,” Harry breathed, taking a step forwards. “Are you sure that you’re a girl and not just like me, maybe? Have you…looked?” Harry asked, getting his facts right before he behaved like a Gryffindor and dived in head first to the situation.

“I looked. I’m a girl. A complete girl, not a boy bit in sight,” Draco confirmed, letting out a sort of hysterical laugh.

“Well, I guess I can now say I have a sister,” Harry said.

“Look at me! This is not what I had in mind!” she hissed, suddenly getting agitated. “I can’t go out there, not now. Merlin, look at me!”

“I’m looking,” Harry replied and she glared at him. “No one is going anywhere until you’re ready,” he soothed.

She stared at him for a long moment and sank down onto the closed lid of the toilet, seemingly closing in on herself. “It’s my fault,” she said, beginning to cry.

“What is?” Harry said, sitting Indian-style beside her on the floor.

“Lucius, what he did to you, the bad things. He did it because I’m a girl. He did it because I was a failure to him. It’s my fault,” she wept. She was shaking with the force of her sobs and Harry reached up to hold her hand. She stared at it.

“You can feel that, can’t you?” Harry asked, tackling one problem at a time.

“Yes,” she whispered in shock. “And it…it doesn’t feel bad.”

Harry smiled gently. “So, we fixed you. That’s a plus.” She couldn’t take her eyes off of his hand in hers. Harry observed that her hands were smaller than his now.

She stared into his eyes, Harry noticing that hers were now exactly like Sirius’ bright blue instead of Lucius’ cold grey. They were swimming with guilt and Harry felt his heart clench. So, now he understood, now he knew why Lucius had done that to him, how he had come to have Miri. But that wasn’t her fault.

“Draco, Lucius may have done this because you weren’t the boy he was expecting, but that doesn’t make this your fault,” Harry said vehemently. “You needing to be a boy was his problem, him needing a male heir is his problem. You’re not to blame, he is. This is all on him. And now I have one more reason to hate him.”

“What reason?” she asked, her eyes searching his, a spark of hope beginning to replace the guilt.

“He hurt my sister. You’re my sister and he did this to you. You have been so worried, so scared for so long because of him. You almost went up in flames because of him, because of what he did. He took everything you had because you did something good. He took everything and cast you aside because you helped me. He is evil. Not you.”

“But I was so vile! I called people so many horrible things, people like Hermione, and Ron. All the Weasley’s. So many good people. I’m so ashamed of what I did. I did it because he told me it was right. But it wasn’t. And I hurt so many people. I hurt you with all the names I called you, with all the times I made fun of you. How can you say I’m not evil after I hurt so many?” she argued. 

“Oh yeah, it’s still you. Bloody stubborn,” he said and she smiled. It wasn’t much of a smile, but it was there. “You put that behind you. You made peace with Hermione and Ron, with all the Weasley’s. And you worked things out with me. Look at us all now. Family. I don’t blame you for anything. Not a single thing. Not what your father did, not what you said or did. This is your fresh start, your do over. You get to wipe the slate clean.”

She stared at him for a moment, processing what he had said before she crumbled fully. Harry caught her as she fell forwards, pulling her onto his lap and into a hug. She stared at him in surprise, peering at the arms holding her.

“I don’t hate it anymore,” she whispered.

He smiled. 

She fell into the hug, crying her eyes out. She cried for all the things she had done, all the things she had said. She cried out all the guilt she felt, all the pain Lucius had caused them both, because of what she was. 

“You’re my sister, and I love you, no matter what.”

And Harry held her, telling her that he loved her, no matter what. He kept repeating it, stroking her hair and rocking her, until she began to believe.

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Remus stroked a fingertip over the tiny nose, his eyes raking the porcelain skin, the dark curls. He ran his hand along one impossibly small arm, smiling at the way her fist gripped his fingers, even in sleep. 

Molly had suggested that maybe Miri would be better in her crib, but Remus had ignored her and Sirius had told the woman not to press it. Miri was almost two months old and he hadn’t really held her yet, hadn’t really looked at her.

She was in his pack and he needed to learn her by heart, to brand her on his memory until he could recognise her by scent alone. His wolf was damn near purring in contentment, feeling protective yet satisfied by the bundle in his arms. His wolf was welcoming her to the pack, finally.

Everyone was pacing, and every now and then one of them would peek out the door at the bathroom. He didn’t care. His cubs were together, it would be all right. They would care for each other, his cubs were strong. 

His wolf was leading the show, it being only a day after the waning moon. His human side was content to sit back and let it. His wolf revelled in the miniature weight of her in his arms, snuggled close. His wolf made him inhale her powdery baby smell, made him memorise it so he would always be able to find her. She was precious, she was special, she was the pup of his cub. 

Remus was sitting on the floor under the sink, his knees drawn up protectively around the baby in his arms and Sirius approached slowly, seeing the wolf in control of his husband. He knew that moving too fast towards him would not be a good idea right now. The way Remus was staring at Miri, holding her hand, sniffing her, all told him that the wolf was welcoming a new member to the pack and it was not a good idea to get between the wolf and the puppy right now. Molly, Arthur and Charlie were glancing at Remus weirdly, but they had never seen him like this before, in full alpha wolf mindset. Solarin seemed to be taking it in her stride.

Amber eyes glanced up at him blazing with the alpha spirit before they calmed, the human side of Remus regaining control for now. The wolf was obviously done welcoming Miri to the pack.

Sirius walked forwards, still going slowly, and sat down next to his husband and granddaughter.

“The wolf satisfied now?” Sirius asked gently.

Remus smiled at him. “How did you know?” he asked in confusion.

“You did the same thing to Harry when he was a baby, and Draco when he was first adopted by us. Of course, Draco found it weird, so did Lily and James before we explained, but I don’t.” He smiled at Remus, placing a hand on his thigh, the touch light but growing more confident as Remus didn’t push it away. “I may get all possessive and over protective of our family but I know that you’re the alpha. And the alpha of this pack needs to welcome all new members. I, personally, enjoyed my welcome very much.” Remus smiled at the memory of the way he had ‘welcomed’ Sirius so thoroughly. “I can’t wait to see Severus’ face when you do it to him,” Sirius joked and Remus blushed.

“As Harry’s mate, Harry is plastered with his scent, I don’t need to,” Remus admitted, watching Sirius blush spectacularly.

“And Solarin? Charlie? Bill?”

“Believe me, I have welcomed all members in one way or another. By scent, by talking when my human is dominant, by their scent on one of my pack. In your case, by mating. I know my pack members. Miri was the only one who was left.”

Sirius smiled, filled with pride for his lover. “You want to put her in her cot now?” he asked gently.

“No,” Remus said immediately, the answer almost a snarl. He softened and licked Sirius’ cheek, a wolf act of apology. His wolf was too near the surface for him to control it with any kind of success, and he knew Sirius understood. “The wolf may have welcomed her, but it may not be a good thing in terms of human thinking. I will not let go of her until I give her directly to either Harry or Severus. The wolf is now determined to protect her. It would be a good idea if nobody tried to take her from me just now,” he explained, the end of his statement quiet, a simple warning.

Sirius nodded. He peered at his husband, his mate. “I’ll keep them from trying, honey, I promise.” He moved forwards and butted noses with him, careful not to touch Miri. “Do you think that our cubs are all right in there?” he asked.

“I think they’re fine. Our cubs are strong and they will care for each other. That is all they need. We will leave them be,” Remus advised and Sirius butted noses with him once more before settling back in his seat, watching his mate protect Harry’s pup.

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Harry stared at her as she pulled back, waiting for some kind of sign of how to proceed. The whole situation was just so bizarre, his mind couldn’t quite process it enough to decide how to even attempt to help Draco.

“I don’t want to be called Draco anymore,” she said.

Ah, a way in. Harry breathed a silent sigh of relief. “You’ve chosen a new name then?” Harry asked and she nodded. “So? What are we calling you then?”

“I like Phoenix,” she revealed. “I like the name Phoenix Rose Lupin-Black. What do you think?”

Harry considered it. The phoenix was the bird of rebirth, a symbol of fresh starts. It was perfect. Plus, it fit in with the Black family tradition of naming their children after constellations.

“I like it. I understand the Phoenix but why Rose?” he asked.

“Your mothers name was Lily, and I like the idea of flower names for girls as a family tradition. I picked Rose because you’re my brother,” she admitted shyly, blushing. 

Harry gaped. “You chose it for me?”

“Yes. I can change it if you don’t like it,” she said hurriedly, mistaking his dropping jaw as disapproval.

“No!” he half yelled. “Don’t change it. If it’s what you want then it’s perfect,” he added softly and she nodded. “You know that Phoenix is going to get shortened to Nix, right?”

“Yeah, probably by you,” she teased and he blushed. “Did you know that a nixie is a kind of German water sprite that looks like a mermaid?”

“No. Suits you though, a nickname that means sprite. You look like one,” he teased back and she pushed at his arm, giggling.

They stood up and Harry looked her over.

“This is permanent, right? I mean, I’m not suddenly going to change into a boy again am I?” she asked.

“No, this is permanent. This is the way you were always meant to look. This is what you were always like under the spell,” Harry reeling off what Severus had told him earlier. “We’re going to have to do something about your hair, it is way too long,” he appraised. “It probably grew under the concealment. It’s not white blonde anymore, it’s more a strawberry blonde.”

“Can you cut it for me?” she asked, holding out a pair of scissors to him.

“Me? Have you looked at my hair lately? I’m not the best candidate for hairstyling.”

“I’m not asking you to style it, just cut it so I can actually walk properly,” she said stubbornly, pushing the handle of the scissors into his hand.

He eyed the scissors and then her hair. It was straight and he envied it. It looked so much easier to handle than his own. He sighed. If he knew her, she would not give up. The little Slytherin was like a rottweiler with a bone sometimes.

“Where am I cutting it to?” he asked as she turned around.

“My waist.”

Harry knelt down and grabbed the waterfall of hair, pushing the pooling excess on the floor out of his way. He pulled it between the blades and paused.

“Are you going to yell at me if this looks really bad when I’m done?” he asked.

“No. I’m going to get Molly or Solarin to do it properly later. But I can’t bloody walk properly, it’s too much.”

Harry smiled, took a deep breath and began to cut. The blonde hair fell away and Phoenix sighed as he finished.

“It’s so much heavier than when I was a boy. Or when I looked like a boy…” she trailed off, Harry standing up and peering over her shoulder at her in the mirror.

“When you were Draco there was so much less of it,” he supplied. He turned away and gathered up the metres of discarded hair, bundling it into the empty laundry sack. “We’ll need to destroy this. Too many dark potions can be made using your hair.”

She nodded and leaned against the sink, eyeing the door warily.

“Do I really have to go out there?” she asked.

“You’re going to have to sooner or later. Best just to get it over with,” he said, waiting for her.

She chewed at her lower lip as she looked into his bright green eyes with her own bright blue ones. “What if Charlie doesn’t want me anymore?” she whispered. “He wanted me when I was Draco, what if he doesn’t want me now I’m Phoenix?”

Harry moved forwards, pulling her into a hug. “You’re still you, just different packaging,” he said firmly. “And if he doesn’t want you now, then he’s not worth having. If he loves you, he won’t care.”

“But he likes guys,” she clarified. “What if he doesn’t like me because I’m a girl?”

Harry chuckled and pulled back, cupping her cheek. “Charlie is bisexual. He likes both. He told me himself during dinner last night,” he said and her mouth fell open into a perfect ‘O’. He laughed at her outright. “His last relationship was with a guy, and the one before was with a girl.”

“Really?”

He nodded and she stared at the door once more before slipping her hand into his.

“Stay with me?” she asked. He grabbed the bag and smiled

“I’ll stay with you as long as you need me.”

He pulled her to the door and led her to the kitchen. She stopped just outside the door and he peeked in. Everyone was up now, and Harry realized that they had been in the bathroom for two hours. Severus looked at him curiously, his gaze attracting the attention of everyone else. They all stared at him, waiting, as he dropped the bag by the bin.

“Phoenix has come out of the bathroom,” Harry said, not quite sure what else he could say.

“Who is Phoenix?” Bill asked, Solarin perched on his lap, looking anxious.

Harry tugged her forwards, bringing her with him into the room. “This is Phoenix Rose Lupin-Black, formerly Draco Lucius Malfoy,” he explained and the kitchen fell silent. All of them gawked at Phoenix and she moved closer to Harry, her grip on his hand tightening.

“This is what the spell was hiding?” Sirius asked. Surprisingly he was the first to recover, and Harry found himself confused as to why his fathers were sitting on the floor. Remus was still holding Miri, his posture protective.

“Yes,” Phoenix whispered.

Solarin pulled out her wand and walked to the two teens, her eyes wide. “Can I check?” she asked softly and the blonde nodded.

Solarin waved her wand over the girl, muttering spells too fast for Harry to distinguish. Her wand tip glowed different colours depending on what spell was uttered. She dropped her wand and looked at the rest of the pack.

“This is real. She is a girl, this is what the spell was hiding,” she proclaimed. Sirius stood up and began to move towards his daughter. Solarin looked at Phoenix, her eyes guilty. “Are you all right? I’m so sorry, I never should have kept digging. If I hadn’t…”

“It’s okay,” Phoenix interrupted. She reached out her free hand and grabbed Solarin’s hand. “I don’t hate touching people anymore. I’m all fixed. I asked you to fix me and you did. I don’t want to scream and throw up when someone touches me, and I’m not numb. I feel absolutely fine, better than I ever remember feeling. So, you really have nothing to apologise for.”

She moved forwards and let Solarin embrace her, though she still kept a tight hold on Harry’s hand. It seemed to break the tension in the room and everyone began to talk at once. 

But Harry’s attention was drawn to the way Severus kept glancing worriedly at Remus and Miri. Phoenix finally let go of Harry’s hand, Sirius checking her for any injury and pushing her into a chair, Molly fixing her something to eat. Harry moved to his husband and sat down next to him, leaning in for a swift kiss.

“Severus? What’s wrong? Did I give you too much sleeping draught?” Harry asked, motioning to the mug of black coffee in his lovers hands and peering at the bloodshot eyes.

“A little too much, but I’m all right, the headache will ease. That is not the problem,” Severus replied. “Remus won’t let go of Miri.”

Harry glanced at his father, noticing for the first time how agitated he seemed.

“When I came down, Sirius tried to get him to give her to me. He damn near pounced on Sirius for suggesting it. He snarled something about the pup belonging to his cub, not the mate,” Severus explained. “She’s not in danger from him, I don’t think. He just won’t let go of her.”

Harry kissed him and made his way over to Remus, moving slowly. Sirius realized his approach and began to hover nearby, unsure of himself. 

Sirius had never seen Remus so territorial, not once. No matter how in control his wolf became, there was always something of Remus’ human side remaining. But when he had tried to follow Remus’ instructions and get him to give Miri to Severus, Remus had become…feral. It was the only way to describe the savage way in which he warned them away from the baby.

Harry sat down next to Remus, keeping space between them. “Remus?”

Wild amber eyes focussed on him, and Harry knew exactly what had happened. Remus was protecting his pup, and the wolf didn’t trust anyone but the pups mother to protect such a small innocent pack member, not even the wolfs own mate. Harry’s prolonged absence must have exaggerated the alpha’s thinking, excluding even Severus. Harry silently thanked whatever deity was up there for his readings on werewolf behaviour.

“Can I have my pup back, my alpha?” Harry requested, careful to keep his voice low and submissive, to keep himself from looking directly into Remus’ eyes as he asked. Everyone was watching them, and Sirius looked tense, ready to pull Remus away if he snapped and attacked Harry.

Remus stared at him and then down at Miri before handing her over, fussing as Harry held her more securely and she snuggled against him. 

“Thank you for protecting her, my alpha,” Harry said, settling Miri against his shoulder. Remus leaned forwards and butted noses with Harry, the latter giggling at the affectionate gesture before returning it with his own butting. “Is she part of the pack now?” 

“Yes,” Remus replied, his wolf receding and letting his human come forward. “How did you know what had happened? How did you know what to do?”

“I did my homework,” Harry chuckled, letting Remus pull him into his lap and sniff his neck possessively.

They stayed like that for a moment before Remus released him, Severus coming forwards to help Harry to his feet. Remus looked sheepish as he got to his feet.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled.

“Nonsense,” Severus said kindly. “It is perfectly acceptable for you to protect your pack. We understand. It is, after all, not long since the full moon. Nobody got hurt and Miri was perfectly safe with you.”

Remus smiled at him and let Sirius pull him into his arms, running his hand through his hair. His eyes landed on the small blonde at the table, happily munching on scrambled eggs while watching the whole wolf scene with interest.

“What did I miss?” Remus asked, motioning to Phoenix.

Sirius sniggered. “Good news or bad news, what do you want first?” he asked.

“Good,” Remus replied, warily.

“Well, our cub came out of the bathroom,” he said, nodding at the blonde.

Remus’ eyes widened. “That is Draco?”

“Was Draco,” Harry intervened as they sat down at the table. “Technically, Draco never really existed. This is Phoenix Rose Lupin-Black.”

“He was a she under the spell?” Remus asked, Phoenix watching them silently, letting her brother handle it for the time being. She kept glancing at Charlie who was leaning against the kitchen counter, watching her with something akin to amazement written across his face.

“Yup,” Harry replied as he pulled funny faces for Miri, the tiny brunette squealing at him, smiling wide. “We should call Dumbledore.”

“He has been called. He will be here shortly,” Severus interjected, sipping at his coffee once more, though he did manage a small smile for his daughter.

“So, the bad news?” Remus asked.

“We now have two children who can get pregnant,” Sirius said, throwing dirty looks at both Severus and Charlie. Severus inclined his head in silent promise of contraception, but Charlie didn’t seem to hear him, his attention was too fixed on Phoenix. Remus smirked at Sirius before turning to the blonde.

Remus beckoned Phoenix over to him and pulled her into his lap, looking at her. “You have Sirius’ eyes,” he murmured. Everyone was watching the two, and Phoenix seemed to be too frightened to move.

She wondered if Harry had been right; would her family still want her now? She waited in silence as Remus looked her over, muttering that she had Sirius’ eyes, lifting her hand to inhale at her wrist. She had liked being his cub. She didn’t want to lose that. She had finally found where she fit, and she was terrified it would all be taken from her, that she would lose everything again. This family had taught her that money wasn’t important, that she was worth more than how many galleons she had in her purse. They had shown her how to be different, better. They had given her a life, their love. She couldn’t bear the thought of it all being taken away.

“Why so frightened, my cub?” Remus asked, feeling the shaking in the slim frame and her eyes widened.

“I’m still your cub?” she whispered.

Remus chuckled. “Of course you are. You’re still my cub, you’re still a part of my pack,” he reassured, and she fell into his arms, burying her head in his shoulder as she cried with relief.

“Definitely a girl,” Harry teased. “All those tears, you’re definitely a girl.”

She turned her head and looked at him, a slight smile on her face through her tears. “Look who’s talking,” she teased back. “You cried daily when you were pregnant.”

He stuck his tongue out at her. “Told you, Nix. Told you that you couldn’t escape us now. Lifetime membership to the madhouse,” he said.

She grinned at him.

It wasn’t so bad, being a girl. She had her family, she had their love, she belonged here. And Charlie didn’t seem to want to turn away from her, which she took as a good sign. 

No, not that bad, being a girl.

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‘Being a girl sucks,’ Phoenix thought to herself as Solarin tried to help her by adjusting the straps of her first bra. Molly had taken one look at her and proclaimed that she needed new clothing.

Clothing which included a bra.

As she was pulled about, Phoenix let herself think back over the day so far. Harry reassuring her, Remus hugging her, Sirius hugging her. It was all fine until Dumbledore had shown up. It appeared to have gone downhill from there.

Severus had given her a pepper-up potion for her fatigue of staying up all night in the bathroom, and Molly had tried to force more food on her already full stomach. It was all right, it showed they cared. She had kind of enjoyed it, being fussed over. Solarin had even leant her some of her clothes until she could get her own. Then Dumbledore arrived. His news was bad, very bad. 

Hermione’s parents had been killed.

Lucius had killed them in the night. He had gone to their home in search of a clue as to how to get to Harry and Miri. He had found the letter that Hermione had sent them, telling them of Harry’s beautiful baby girl. The famous Malfoy temper had exploded and he had killed them in the most horrific way. It rivalled Harry’s treatment at the hands of Lucius for its brutality and sadism.

The authorities and half the Order were now on the hunt for the fugitive murderer. They now had all the answers they ever wanted about Lucius, but it had come at a terrible price.

Dumbledore had explained everything to them. Lucius was bankrupt, and without the dowry that Draco’s marriage to Pansy would have brought him, he had lost everything. It turned out that Lucius’ father had gambled away the Malfoy fortunes, and it was only the money Narcissa brought with her to the marriage that had allowed Lucius to keep up appearances. He had used the last of it to keep himself out of Azkaban. 

With Lucius expecting his heir to be male, he had received a terrible shock when Narcissa had delivered a girl. He had concealed Phoenix as Draco shortly after she was born and threatened to throw Narcissa out if she ever revealed the truth. She had been greedy for the attention she received as Lady Malfoy, so she had kept quiet.

His attack on Bill and Charlie had been explained as well. Pansy had told her father of Draco’s impotence and he had called off the arranged marriage. Lucius, having lost hold of Harry, became desperate, knowing what he had done to Draco was having noticeable side effects.

It was still a mystery how Lucius had learned of Harry’s true anatomy, but they knew now why he had tortured and raped Harry. 

Lucius Malfoy could not produce male children. His treatment of Harry had been his way of trying to prove his masculinity by producing a boy. He hadn’t realised that Harry would only bear a boy if the biological father could produce them. Severus had actually shattered the glass he was holding when he heard that one, his temper making him tighten his grip.

Dumbledore had surprised them all by going back through the floo and bringing Narcissa herself with him when he returned. She was the source of all the information.

Phoenix remembered how she had moved forwards to embrace her and she had pulled away, feeling very loved when Remus’ alpha wolf flared again and snarled at her to ‘Keep away from my cub!’ Phoenix had never seen Narcissa more afraid than in that one moment and she had enjoyed it immensely. But her enjoyment faded when Hermione entered the kitchen, coming for her breakfast. 

Her heart had broken for her as she had screamed at Dumbledore that it couldn’t be true, as she had begged him to take back what he had said. Phoenix had watched in horror as Hermione had collapsed in a fit of sobbing, so strong that she could barely breathe. She had clung to Ron and called Dumbledore a liar over and over.

Solarin had taken Phoenix aside and said that the two of them were going out, that they were going to deal with what she needed while everyone else cared for Hermione. Solarin had appeared to be in so much pain that Phoenix had found it hard to voice her disagreement over leaving but she managed it, not wanting to abandon Hermione. However, Bill had intervened, telling Solarin in no uncertain terms that she had to leave the house as soon as possible, that he would tell her when she could come back.

So now they were standing in a lingerie shop in Diagon Alley with Phoenix being fitted for her first bra.

“How does it feel?” Solarin asked, peering over her shoulder and catching her eyes in the reflection of the mirror.

“Weird. And uncomfortable. And it itches. This sucks,” Phoenix replied, shifting her shoulders and picking at the straps, her nose wrinkled in obvious hatred of the garment. 

Solarin chuckled. “I know. They take some getting used to. What I was referring to was the fit. Is it too tight, too loose? We know the cups fit, but how about the band and the straps?” 

“No, it feels fine, I guess,” she grumbled, the sales witch smiling encouragingly. “Why can’t I wear something like Harry’s?”

“Because, Nix, you’re a double D cup. A sports bra wouldn’t give you the support you need. Harry is barely an A cup. He only needs a small amount of support,” Solarin reasoned. Solarin had managed to stay patient with her throughout the entire hour long fitting process. 

First off, Phoenix had refused to enter the shop, forgetting that she was a girl now. Then she had nearly died of embarrassment at the sight of so many pieces of women’s underwear. She had wished for the ground, which her eyes had remained glued upon, to open up and swallow her while Solarin explained the situation to the sales witch. Then Phoenix had argued about taking off her top. Well, until Solarin took off hers. Solarin had taken her own top off as a show of support for the obviously trying experience. Finally, Phoenix had given in and allowed the older witch to help her find underwear she didn’t absolutely loathe, a tall order in itself.

Phoenix stared at the lacy thing she was wearing. At least it wasn’t pink, that would have been a real insult to her pride.

“Does it have to be lace?” she wined. “It itches.”

Solarin actually dissolved into peels of laughter at the disgusted look on her face. “No!” she gasped. “You can have ones made of other materials, like cotton. It’s good for you to have a selection, so you can learn what you like over a period of a few days of wearing them.”

The blonde nodded and sighed. “I really have no choice, do I?”

“Nope. You have to wear one,” the augur insisted cheerfully as she pulled on her own top again.

“Fine, but no pink,” she demanded and Solarin nodded.

They finally left the shop twenty minutes later with much more than just bras. Phoenix had not only been outfitted with seven bras in various styles and materials, but socks, stockings, and panties. That had been an experience, with Solarin having to explain what the point of thongs were. Phoenix was impressed that Solarin had managed to keep a straight face. She hadn’t even blushed. It wasn’t fair, the blonde couldn’t seem to stop her face burning.

“So, why do I need a see through set of pyjamas that don’t look as if they’re designed to sleep in?” Phoenix asked as they made their way through the milling crowds.

Solarin giggled. “Every woman needs something sexy in her underwear drawer. It’s not for anyone else, it’s for you.” Phoenix looked at her confusedly. “You have a whole new body now. Well, new to you. With sleepwear like this, you can see what feels good against your skin. With sleepwear like this, you can…explore.”

Phoenix frowned, trying to figure out what she meant, and then blushed yet again as she figured it out. Solarin giggled and slipped an arm around her waist, pulling her close.

“I have some,” Solarin revealed.

“Some what?”

“Some sexy sleepwear. When I feel a little down, I put it on and it makes me feel better. Most women have something similar. Think of it as a gift to yourself.”

“But Remus and Sirius are paying for this.”

Solarin grinned. “And imagine how embarrassed they’ll be when they get the bill,” she whispered playfully in her ear, making her laugh.

They made their way to a hairdressers, and Phoenix found herself with a style similar to Solarin’s. No fringe, but carefully layered so it framed her face. She and Solarin sniggered when the stylist had proclaimed that whoever cut it in the first place was an imbecile.

After that, they visited a clothing boutique, a cosmetics retailer, a shoe shop, a small spa and a pharmacy. At the end of it, Phoenix was deposited in a seat outside Florean Fortescues Ice Cream Parlour and a large chocolate orange sundae presented as her reward for good behaviour.

“I’m impressed you actually managed to do all this without bolting once,” Solarin praised, nibbling a cherry from her own desert, a fruit cocktail with strawberry ice cream. She grinned. “Though when the beautician pulled out hot wax I felt for sure you’d run.”

Phoenix shifted in her seat. “That was bloody painful,” she grumbled, taking a spoonful and letting it melt on her tongue before swallowing it. “You’re sure I’ll never have to go through that again?”

“Never,” Solarin promised. “Tracy is very good at hair removal, and the charms to make it permanent. It will not grow back, I swear.”

Phoenix nodded. Having all your body hair pulled out by the root once in a lifetime was more than enough. All she had left now was some neatly trimmed pubic hair, her eyebrows and her long blonde hair. Though her eyebrows had been plucked. That was an experience that could only have been equalled by bloodshed. Come to think of it, it very nearly was as Phoenix had lost her temper and tried to hit the woman holding the tweezers. But Solarin had stopped her and numbed the area with a spell. It went quite smoothly after that. Well, until the bikini wax.

“I am rather surprised you wanted it done,” Solarin admitted, taking a sip of her ice water.

“Women don’t have body hair, well, most don’t. I don’t want to be different anymore,” she replied easily and the augur nodded, letting the subject drop.

The blonde looked at the older witch and wondered if she was the right one to take her worries to. 

“What’s wrong?” the brunette asked at Phoenix’s worried nibbling of her lower lip.

“I just…Harry says that it’s not my fault that Lucius did bad things to him. Do you think Harry’s right?” she asked, deciding to say it all in one go, to get it out in the open.

“Yes, I do think he’s right. Lucius did what he did to both of you because he’s sick. In no way are you to blame for any of it. If Lucius wasn’t such a bastard he would have found a reasonable, legal, way to get himself out of trouble instead of doing that to Harry,” she said sincerely and without any hesitation whatsoever. Phoenix felt all her worries melt away at the simple honesty and offered a small smile. She felt very nervous when Solarin grinned wickedly.

“So…Charlie. He couldn’t take his eyes off of you at breakfast,” Solarin said lightly, nibbling at a slice of peach.

Phoenix knew she was blushing, again, but she couldn’t seem to stop doing it. Was this just part of who she was now? A blushing girl? She hoped not. It was so noticeable on her pale skin.

“Can we change the subject, please?” she asked, ducking her head in shyness and her companion giggled. Funny, she had never noticed the older witches girlish side before. Maybe it was because she was usually surrounded by men.

“Fine, fine. I was just going to ask if you thought he would mind if I ask him not to think so loud when he’s having a think about you, that’s all.”

Her blue eyes snapped up and locked with black. “He was thinking about me?”

She knew the augur was teasing her. Probably.

“Yup. Projecting loud and clear…well, before Dumbledore told us about Hermione’s parent’s, that is,” she said, her smile fading immediately.

“How is she doing? Can’t you ask Bill through the connection?” Phoenix asked sadly, memories of Hermione’s heartbreaking sobs coming to the surface.

“I keep trying but he’s not in much of a position to talk right now. I’m guessing it’s bad. He’s keeping his barriers locked tight so I can’t get in. He’s trying to protect me from all the emotions flying around back there. I’m not going to push it. He’ll talk to me when it calms down a little.”

“Is that why you looked in pain?”

“Yes. When emotions run high I can’t block them completely, and Hermione’s were, understandably, very high. It was…intense.”

They were silent, finishing their ice creams and then ordering more drinks, each lost in their own thoughts. They had almost finished them when Solarin spoke again.

“How do you feel about having Narcissa around? Sirius invited her to stay at Grimmauld Place with us, at least until she sorts herself out, and she accepted. How do you feel about that?” Solarin asked.

“I want her gone,” Phoenix snarled, startling Solarin with her sudden anger. “She let him do that to me, let him lie to me, all to keep herself in a nice cushy position. She knew what he did, and she did nothing. She could have told me, she could have stood up to him. I did. I went against him to help Harry. I lost everything to do the right thing. What kind of mother is she that just lets someone do something so twisted to their child?”

Solarin sat quietly, letting her vent her anger. God, her and Sirius were so alike. Definitely father and daughter.

“She’s a lousy mother, and she is not my family. I have a family.” Phoenix sighed, losing some of her rage as she thought of Remus and Sirius and Harry. “I have a family that loves me, I have a family that will never walk away. She did. She just packed her bags one day and left. She didn’t slow down, didn’t look back, didn’t even say goodbye. That’s not a parent. That’s a child pretending to be a mother. A parent will do anything for their child,” she reasoned, working on her experiences. “That’s why I used to hate Harry so much, you know. His parents died for him and mine never even made me feel wanted. It was unfair, and I was jealous.”

“That’s understandable,” Solarin intervened.

“The fights between you and Bill, those were about your parents weren’t they?” she asked cautiously, her curiosity getting the better of her.

“Yes, they were,” Solarin admitted quietly. “I’m not going to tell you about them, not in detail. You’re too young to have to think of something like that. But I will tell you that I didn’t have a very good experience with my parents. But I had Severus. He was all I needed. And now you have a whole big family. Is that all you need?” she asked, steering the conversation back to the little blonde and her feelings on the whole mess.

“Yes. They’re all I need. They’ve shown me so much. They’ve taught me to be different…better. I know now. I know that I’m worth more than the money I have or the Malfoy name. I like being me now. Our family gave me that. And Narcissa is not a part of that,” she said and Solarin smiled.

“Then that’s all you have to remember when dealing with her.” She snorted. “You know, legally, she’s not your mother anymore. Arthur is drawing up a new birth certificate for you, it’s part of your adoption. Remus and Sirius are going to be put down as your parents.”

Phoenix grinned. “Fine by me.”

“And Albus is going to transfer all of Draco’s school records into your name, so you have proof you went to Hogwarts. Well, all of your grades anyway,” she said with a smile, amused by the way Phoenix had suddenly brightened. “It’s a total fresh start for you, complete with paperwork.” 

“That is brilliant.”

“So…Charlie,” Solarin said once more. “You know, you’ll never need blusher with a flush like that,” she teased, poking Phoenix’s cheek. The blonde batted her hand away.

“Harry told me that Charlie is bisexual. You think he still likes me now I’m different?” she asked after a few minutes of ducking her head in shyness.

The brunette smiled at her. “From what he was projecting, I’d say…hell yeah! He adores you, and…” She sniggered. “He thinks you’re hot like this. Mind you, he thought you were hot as Draco as well, so I’m guessing he’s just very into you, both of you.”

The young witches jaw dropped and she ducked down, pretending to rummage through the shopping bags to hide her current mortification.

Solarin was in a full out laughing fit at her little companions antics. She was easier to get to than Severus, it was almost too easy. Almost.

Blue eyes peeked over the table top. “Really?”

The black eyed witch nodded and the blonde let out a little squeak before she disappeared once more, causing the older witch to laugh even harder.

“Oh! Sweet Merlin! No wonder he finds you adorable!” she gasped out and found herself being glared at by a cherry red face.

“Not funny,” Phoenix ground out between clenched teeth.

“I’m sorry, sweetie. It’s just, it’s nice that you have someone.” Solarin paused, watching the fair-haired girl process the information. When she was Draco, she was quiet, withdrawn even. But now she was bubbly and full of life. The new demeanour in her student eased her lingering apprehension over her involvement in the transformation. She sighed, feeling very protective all of a sudden. “Nixie, I should give you the lecture,” she said firmly.

“What lecture?” Phoenix asked.

“The one about not getting pregnant, not rushing things and keeping yourself safe,” Solarin replied. 

“You’re too late. Harry gave it to me while we were giggling in the corner before Dumbledore arrived. He did the whole big brother thing, telling me about condoms and saying no and respecting myself. He was pretty good at it, actually,” Phoenix informed, smirking at Solarin’s dumbfounded expression, which quickly turned relieved.

“Well, at least I don’t have to give it. I suck at talking about that stuff. Ask Bill. He asked me to talk to Percy once, whole big brother thing with too much embarrassment. Mortifying.”

Phoenix chuckled.

“So, I’m not required to explain my reasons for giving you these then,” she said, handing the sixteen year old a small paper bag. 

Phoenix peeked inside. “Condoms? Sol, I’m not going to…you know…any time soon.”

“They’re for when you do, so you don’t get caught short. There is a charm you can use, but these are just in case.”

Phoenix was just about to retaliate that her and Charlie hadn’t even kissed yet when Solarin gasped, pitching forwards.

“Sol?” she asked worriedly, holding her steady by the upper arms.

“We need to go,” the augur commanded, beginning to gather up some of the bags, Phoenix grabbing the rest and following her back to the Leaky Cauldron.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, their pace fast as they weaved in and out of the other shoppers.

“The stress of her parents death caused Hermione to go into labour.”

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	4. Chapter Four

The waiting room of St Mungo’s maternity ward was a tense place, and it didn’t get any easier as the minutes trickled by. All of them were gathered there, Weasley’s, Lupin-Black’s, Potter-Snape’s, Snape, Tonks and Dumbledore. The only two missing were Ron and Hermione.

The stress of her bad news had Hermione going into a sudden and fierce labour, the witch panicking that she was almost a full week early. No matter how anyone had tried to reassure her that it was only a few days ahead of schedule, she wouldn’t listen and had worked herself up even more. Her birth plan had included her parents being with her. She had kept screaming about her parents, about being early, and about Harry’s screams during Miri’s birth. No one had seemed to be able to calm her, not even Ron. She was so frantic that Madame Pomfrey had been forced to move her to the hospital, proclaiming that Hermione would do better with lots of intervention from many healers and midwives. 

The whole family had chosen to go along for the wait, all of them worried by how frantic the brilliant young witch had become. They had been in the waiting room two hours, and still there was no sign of anyone coming to tell them what was going on.

“Harry, will you sit down? You’re going to wear yourself out,” Bill suggested and smirked as he was met with a grunt of refusal and a shake of the messy head.

“Don’t bother. This is Potter we’re talking about. He is very stubborn and has a ‘people saving thing’, as Hermione puts it. He won’t settle until he hears that she is all right. You might as well save your breath,” Severus intervened, trying to soothe a fussy Miri. He had tried everything over the last two hours in the waiting room to get her to settle but she wouldn’t. She continued to whine at him, twisting in his arms. He couldn’t understand it, Miri was a very placid baby, nothing seemed to get to her except having her feet touched. No one was touching her feet now, so he couldn’t explain it.

“Do you think she’s all right in there?” Tonks asked. “She didn’t look so good when her waters broke.”

“She is in the best possible hands,” Severus reassured, sighing in defeat. “Harry, I can’t get Miri to settle. She needs her carrier, love.”

That got Harry’s attention. He moved immediately to his daughter, taking her and bouncing her. But it didn’t work. If anything, it made her worse. She began to cry, really cry. It sounded so pained compared to her usual whimper.

“Severus! What’s wrong with her?” Harry asked, panicking, Miri’s cries getting harsher and she tried to throw herself out of Harry’s arms. All of them were watching worriedly, their concern for Hermione being overridden by this new situation.

Severus began to panic with his lover and shot up from his chair, trying to soothe her with his husband. Unbelievably, she got more frantic, screaming now. “I don’t know, love. Maybe we should get a healer,” he suggested, trying to remember to breathe.

Sirius darted to his feet, heading for the door to get one for them, and was nearly hit in the face by it opening. Ron stood in the doorway, a wide smile on his face.

“I’m a dad,” he announced. His smile faded when he saw how bad Miri was. “What’s wrong with her?”

“We don’t know. She’s never been like this before,” Harry said, a few tears of panic making their way down his bloodless face. Ron came forwards and stroked his hand over Miri’s curls, holding in his news out of concern for his best friends daughter.

The tiny girl stopped crying. Everyone froze at the sudden silence.

“What the hell just happened?” Charlie asked his youngest brother. “How did you do that?”

“I did nothing! I just stroked her hair,” Ron explained, stunned as Miri cooed at him.

“Harry, give Ron the baby,” Solarin said, her eyes narrowed in suspicion. Harry tried to voice protest but she stopped him. “Humour me for a moment, give her to him.”

Harry reluctantly handed Miri over and she began to gurgle contentedly.

“All right, I am very lost,” Severus said. “What is going on?”

“You shouldn’t be lost, you of all people should understand,” Solarin said, a light smile on her face. They all looked at her as if she had gone mad. “Go with me for a moment, and I will show you what just happened.”

She looked around the room, her eyes landing on Phoenix. “Nixie, come here.” The blonde obeyed. “Okay, you hold Miri, and let your emotions go with what I say to you, all right?”

Phoenix glanced at Miri and then at Harry. “Can I hold her, Harry?” she asked. She had never held the baby before, her symptoms as Draco preventing her, first out of disgust and then out of danger of Miri being dropped from her numb arms.

“Of course,” Harry agreed. Solarin came forwards and transferred the infant from Ron to Phoenix, showing her how to hold her.

“Everyone watching?” she asked with a smirk. They all nodded mutely and she turned to Phoenix, sitting her down. 

“Right. Narcissa,” she stated to Phoenix and Miri began to throw her tiny fists around, making a sound that was almost a growl. 

“Remus,” she said and Miri laughed, babbling happily.

“Lucius.” Miri screamed, crying as if the world was ending.

“Sirius.” Miri giggled.

“Charlie,” she said and Miri looked confused, Phoenix blushing. Solarin chuckled. “All right, that one was a bit out there. Severus,” she said, and Miri babbled.

Solarin smirked. She turned around and looked at everyone, confusion written across their faces. “Don’t you get it? Come on, Sevus, you of all people should recognise this,” she said mockingly, grinning like the Cheshire cat.

Severus began to shake his head in disbelief. “No…you can’t mean…she can’t be…” he muttered, ending with an amazed bark of laughter. “You’re serious, aren’t you?”

“Yup.”

“I cannot believe I didn’t figure that one out. I must be getting slow in my old age.” 

“Will one of you tell me what the fuck is wrong with my baby?” Harry demanded, his panic causing his patience to reach breaking point.

“Nothing is wrong with her, Harry. I swear it,” Severus soothed, rubbing his hand along his back. “Miri is special, right?”

“Yes. She’s my baby, fable says she will be very powerful,” Harry said, not taking his eyes off his daughter.

“Solarin is special too, isn’t she?” Severus asked, leading Harry to the answer.

“Yes. She’s the only one like her, the only augur,” Harry replied, glancing at his smiling sister-in-law.

“Not anymore,” Solarin muttered.

“Miri is like Solarin. Miri is an augur,” Severus said with a smile, Harry laughing in incredulity and relief, Severus holding him while the tension seeped out of his body, leaving him weak and shaking.

“What?” Sirius asked. “Are you sure?”

“Miri reacting to other people’s emotions is the first indicator of it. Solarin used to do it all the time when she was a baby. Though, granted, she didn’t start until she was six months old,” Severus explained.

“But how is that possible if there is only ever one augur in the world at a time?” Bill asked.

“Because Miri is special. They both are,” Harry said firmly. “Can I hold her and have her not scream at me?”

Solarin gazed at him for a moment before nodding. “Yes. You’re not worried about Hermione or panicking about Miri. You’re calm and relieved, she’ll be fine with that. I promise I’ll explain everything properly when we get home.” She turned to Ron. “So, how is Hermione?”

Ron blinked in surprise and then a huge grin spread across his face, though there was sadness in its depths. “She’s fine, absolutely fine. Well, physically. She’s devastated about her parents. I left her alone, she told me to. Madame Pomfrey told me she just needs me to go away for a while, so she can think things over,” he said as Harry gathered Miri into his arms, the tiny augur cooing at him.

“The baby?” Charlie asked, distracting his brother.

Ron’s grin, however impossible it may have seemed, grew even wider. “A boy…and a girl,” he announced and Molly laughed. Sirius, Arthur, Charlie and Bill moved forwards to clap him on the back with a heart felt round of ‘well done’. Fred and George appeared thoroughly impressed, chuckling in that way men have that make it seem as if some dirty joke has just been uttered.

“Twins?” Harry asked, his jaw practically on the floor. “Sweet Merlin, no wonder she was so much bigger than me.” Harry smiled as he remembered Hermione’s grumblings. Even at his biggest, Harry’s bump hadn’t even reached a quarter of the size of Hermione’s. He shuddered at the thought of delivering two babies at once. Miri had been hard enough to get out.

“Twins,” Ron chuckled. “Midwife was so shocked she nearly passed out. The girl came first, the boy a minute later. We’re going to call them Catherine Molly and Joseph Arthur, after both of our parents.” He grinned and everyone began to ask questions, asking him about tiny fingers and toes, if they had red hair.

Harry passed Miri to Severus and slipped from the room, making his way down the oddly silent hallways until he reached the door to Hermione’s room. He peeked around it to find his friend lying on her side, quietly crying.

He slipped in and made his way over, ridding himself of his shoes. He slithered onto the bed and held her, letting her mourn the future she had envisioned but would never have.

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Phoenix shifted in her bed, trying to get comfortable. She growled in frustration and sat up, plucking disgustedly at the nightwear she wore. 

“Comfortable my arse,” she spat as she stood up, pulling at her wedgy. “Bloody things.” 

She spun to the door when she heard the sniggering. There stood Charlie, watching her with an amused smile. She let her eyes fall to the floor.

“I knew I should have closed that door,” she muttered, willing herself not to blush. She glanced at him. He appeared to be trying not to laugh. It made her temper rise. “You try wearing it and see how well you do!” she snapped and he lost his battle, letting out a loud guffaw at her.

They stood uncertainly, glancing at each other. Neither was sure what to say, or who should be the first to speak. He propped himself against the doorframe, folding his arms across his chest to keep his hands busy. She leant against the fireplace, twiddling her hair.

“Exciting day,” Charlie said.

“Yeah. Very exciting. How do you think Hermione is?” Phoenix replied, latching onto the neutral topic.

“Mum says she’s fine. Tired and grieving, but mum says she’s doing as well as she could be doing at this point.”

Silence fell between them again and Phoenix noticed that he seemed to be more nervous than she was. She giggled at the way he was chewing on his lower lip. His eyes met hers. “The brave dragon tamer,” she teased and he snorted. “Charlie, we’re still friends, right?”

“Of course we are,” he said, watching her sit on the edge of the bed, the way she watched him.

“Then come here and sit down so we can talk,” she commanded. 

He pushed off from the doorframe and moved to the bed, sitting down beside her with enough room for Hagrid to sit between them.

“I’m not carrying some horrible illness, you know,” she spat at him, offended.

He smirked. “No, just PMS by the sound of it,” he joked. Not the best move he had ever made, as she shoved at his shoulder so hard he was pushed off of the bed.

“You asked for it,” she spat as he glared at her.

“All right, I’m sorry. I just don’t know what to say,” he mumbled as he regained his seat, sitting closer to her.

“I’m not a different person, you know. It’s just my body that’s different.”

“You sure?”

“Very. Why? Are you implying that I’m nothing more than a hormonal girl now?” she griped. Inside she was berating herself furiously, wondering why she was being so mean.

He sniggered. “You’re doing a good impression of it right now.”

It was like a red flag. She glared at him, her eyes blazing. “Well, if I’m that hormonal why don’t you just get out then?” she asked stiffly.

His eyes widened. The realization of just what was going on here hit him like a ton of bricks. How could he have been so stupid to have missed it? He wanted to slap himself, he had been so blind.

“You’re scared,” he said simply and she blushed, looking away. “You think I won’t want you anymore.” He chuckled. “You can be pretty dense sometimes, Nix.”

“Why has everyone insisted on shortening my name?” she snarled. She didn’t really mind it, except she was on the defensive, looking for any way to push him away incase she got hurt.

“Because Phoenix is a very long name,” he chuckled. “Besides, Nix suits you. But I don’t want to call you Nix, or Nixie, or any other variation of Phoenix.”

She suddenly felt her stomach churning. Fear gripped her at the thought of him still wanting to call her Draco. ‘No!’ she screamed inside her head. ‘Draco was horrible, he was a bad boy. I was mean when I was Draco. I’m not that person anymore, I’m not!’ But she couldn’t say anything.

“I want to call you Rose,” he said and she stared at him in shock. “I want something that only I call you.”

Her mouth had suddenly gone very dry. “Why?” she whispered.

“Because you’re my girlfriend…if you still want to be…that is…I mean…if you don’t want to…not that there’s any pressure…but…well…I know you were my boyfriend…but you’re…well…now you’re…”

He trailed off, unable to actually form a complete sentence anymore. Damn, he was doing it again, regressing ten years. He kept his eyes trained on the floor, refusing to look up into her eyes and see her ready to reject him. 

“And here I was thinking you wouldn’t want me anymore.”

He snapped his head up to find her smiling at him, her cheeks blazing.

“You blush,” he said, stunned. “As Draco you never did that.”

She raised her hands to her face and, unbelievably, it started to spread down her neck.

“I wish I didn’t as Phoenix either. I seem to have spent the day with my face burning. And Solarin didn’t help either. She seemed to delight in making it happen. It’s not fair, I’ve never seen her blush, not once,” Phoenix complained, willing it to go away.

“I kind of like it,” he said quietly and she grinned as he began to go red.

“You blush too,” she said delightedly. “I feel better now. At least I’m not the only one.” She peered at him, nervously plucking at the hem of her camisole. She chuckled.

“What?” he asked, laughing with her, though he had no idea why she was laughing.

“Nothing, it’s just…well, Sol asked me if I thought you’d mind if she asked you not to think so loud.”

“I think loud?”

“Apparently you were projecting.”

Charlie frowned in concentration as he tried to figure out when he might have done that, but the stresses of the day clouded his mind. “When?”

She nibbled her lower lip, her cheeks going rosy again. “Breakfast. When I came out of the bathroom,” she admitted and he wished for a hole to open up and swallow him. 

“She heard that?” he asked, his face blazing.

The blonde nodded. 

“Ummmm…did she…uh…tell you what…er…I was thinking about?” he asked nervously and he was mortified when she nodded again. “What did she tell you?”

“She said that you thought I was hot like this,” she admitted in a whisper, and his ears turned a brilliant shade of crimson.

“I can’t believe she heard that,” he muttered to himself.

“Do you like this body?” she asked curiously, examining it herself. Her blue gaze searched along her pale thighs, her smooth arms, her torso.

He stared at her, trying to figure out if this was the right time to be honest. She could be teasing him, toying with him. When she was Draco she had loved to tease. And as Phoenix she was no different, but she seemed to reserve it only for Harry and Sirius, the ones who would tease back. Charlie had never been the target of either blonde. But there was a first time for everything.

“Are you teasing me?” he asked, diverting her attention from her own wiggling toes.

“No. Why would you think I was teasing you?” she asked, confused.

“You love to tease. You loved it when you were Draco as well.”

“But I’ve never teased you. I save it for Harry and Sirius. I don’t understand.”

“There’s a first time for everything,” he muttered, suddenly embarrassed by his second guessing of her genuine curiosity. 

She glared at him, thinking that he was mocking her. And then she noticed the way he was staring at the floor, the way he was picking at his fingernails. 

He was scared.

Of her. Of her possible rejection of him.

She smiled gently. “I’m not teasing you. I’m curious. Harry told me that you’re bisexual. And I want to believe him, but I need to hear you say it. Do you like this body?” she explained.

“Yes, I like it. I like it very much. But that’s not what I need to hear,” he replied, watching her eyes narrow. “I need to hear that you’re still the same person. That you’re still the one who loves oranges, and the colour purple, and that Sirius is still your favourite person to annoy. I need to know that you’re still the same on the inside, because that’s the person I want to be with.”

Her mouth dropped open in surprise. “I didn’t think you’d remember about the oranges,” she mumbled. “I didn’t know that it was really me you wanted and not just the form I took.”

“You didn’t believe me?” She shook her head. “I know that this is a bad way to put it but it’s the only one I’ve got so don’t mock me for it or get offended.” He took a deep breath. “For me, it’s the chocolate bar, not the wrapper, that’s important. I look for what is inside, not the outside.”

She sat there, looking at him, working it all through in her head. 

“It’s still me, just different packaging,” she said and he grinned. “Charlie?”

“Yes?”

“Will you still be my boyfriend?”

His grin seemed so wide that she wondered if he could crack his face with it. “Yes, yes I will,” he said.

“Charlie?” she asked shyly, picking at the bedspread.

“Yes?”

“Are you a good kisser?” 

“I’ve never had any complaints,” he joked lightly. “Why?”

“Because I’ve never enjoyed a kiss, so I was wondering if you were good at it.”

He sucked at his lower lip to keep himself from saying something she may hit him for. “Come lie down with me,” he said, keeping his lecherous thoughts to himself.

They lay down on the bed and he drew the covers up, making sure she was tucked in. He lit a few candles on the bedside table before he propped himself up on one elbow, staring down at her.

“You have freckles across your nose and cheekbones.” He ran his finger along the scattering, making her giggle. He leaned in and kissed the tip of her nose. “Can I keep you?” he whispered.

“Yes,” she whispered back. She reached up and ran her fingers through his hair, smiling at how silky it was. “I can feel it now.”

He smiled at her and ran his hand along her stomach, watching her jump in surprise. “Can I kiss you, Rose?”

She nodded and he leaned in, slowly, taking his sweet time. He considered it her first kiss ever, not just her first with him. And he was determined to make it a good one. His lips brushed hers and he captured her lower lip between his two, kissing her, soft and gentle. Her fingers tightened in his hair and he pulled her closer, wrapping her in his arms. After a moment, she began to kiss back, the movement of her lips jerky and hesitant. 

Phoenix felt his lips on hers and wondered how she had ever managed to bring herself to kiss Pansy when she was Draco. Charlie’s kiss was possessive, but gentle, deep yet hesitant. It was a total contradiction but it suited him, strangely. She had no idea what she was doing, it had never felt like this before. When she was Draco, the main point during a kiss was concentrating on not throwing up. But now, with Charlie, she wasn’t quite sure what she was supposed to do. So she relaxed, letting herself kiss back. It had never been this difficult when she was Draco. But it felt good now, it felt better. 

She pulled back and smiled shyly at him. 

“So, am I a good kisser?” he asked and she nodded, blushing again. “Is there anything you don’t blush at?”

“I haven’t found one yet, but I’m determined,” she said firmly. She ran her fingertips over his brow, down his nose, along his cheekbones, along his bottom lip. His hand was resting on her ribs and she found that she liked it, liked having the warm pressure of it. She caressed the stubble on his jaw. “It prickles.”

He smiled. “I don’t usually shave before bed,” he joked.

“I don’t mind it. Did mine feel like that when I was Draco? Even before I went numb I was too disgusted to really feel it.”

“Yes, when you were Draco your stubble felt like mine.”

She traced his ear, tracing the curve of it, tugging the lobe between her fingers. She closed his eyes and stroked his eyelashes. The brown eyes fluttered open again as she laid her hand hesitantly on his chest.

“Will you stay with me tonight?” she asked.

“I think Sirius might kill me for it,” he said, laughing.

“Why? We’re only going to sleep,” she replied, confused.

“Didn’t you see the glare he gave me at breakfast? When he told Remus that they had two children that could get pregnant. I know he thinks I didn’t see it but I did. He’ll kill me if he finds me here.”

“But he was okay with it when I was Draco. I don’t understand. Why is it different now?”

“Because when you were Draco you couldn’t be taken advantage of the way you can now. Trust me, it’s different,” he said, watching her pout.

“But I want you to stay, why can’t you?” she insisted stubbornly.

Charlie was about to argue with her that it wouldn’t be proper now, that things had changed, but a growl and a hand grabbing the back of his shirt distracted him. He was roughly pulled from the bed and dragged to the door, the hand shoving him out into the hallway. He turned around to find an infuriated Sirius glaring at him.

Charlie held up his hands in a placating move, but Sirius was still advancing on him. “Sirius, we weren’t doing anything, I swear to all mighty Merlin,” Charlie managed to get out, stopping Sirius, though he was still taking deep furious breaths.

“You were in bed with my sixteen year old daughter at eleven o’clock at night,” Sirius snarled, standing in the open doorway. “Do you really expect me to believe you?”

“We’re both still dressed. Believe that if nothing else.” Charlie viewed the angry animagus the same way he had viewed an angry horntail: a situation to be handled cautiously.

Sirius glanced up and down at Charlie’s pyjama clad form and then did the same with Phoenix. “Fine, I believe you,” he ground out. “But you are going back to your own bed.”

“Why can’t he stay here with me?” Phoenix asked, scrambling from the bed.

“Because I said so,” Sirius replied. “Back to your own beds, both of you.”

He left no room for argument and Charlie shot Phoenix an apologetic look before he complied.

Sirius stood over Phoenix as she got back into bed, making sure she didn’t follow the redhead. She might have been stubborn, but Sirius was bigger than her, and she suspected he wasn’t above sitting in her room all night.

“Good night, Phoenix,” Sirius called out as he left the room. He paused at the door. “Mine and Remus’ room is right next to Charlie’s room. We will hear you if you try to go in there. Stay in your own bed. Sweet dreams.” And with that he left, closing the door behind him.

Phoenix huffed in annoyance. She never had gotten her answer from Charlie, so she didn’t understand what they had done wrong. Sirius hadn’t had a problem with them sleeping in the same bed when she was Draco. She didn’t see the difference. But she couldn’t go and ask Charlie, not when his room was right next to her parents.

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Harry rolled over and cracked his eyes open, groaning at the whimpering coming from the baby monitor. “Midnight feed,” he grumbled as Severus hugged him.

“I’ll get her,” Severus said, kissing his cheek.

“Can’t we put her on solids yet?” Harry moaned, sitting up and ridding himself of his t-shirt.

Severus slipped from the room and returned a moment later, Miri gurgling in his arms. “Another two months, love. But she should start sleeping through the night before long, at least, that is what Molly told me,” Severus replied, transferring the baby to Harry before slipping back into bed, assuming their usual position of Harry cradled against him.

“Not fair,” Harry wined as Miri latched on. “I miss having a full nights sleep.”

Severus chuckled and kissed his neck. “Me too. But it will end soon. Patience.”

“Screw patience,” Harry retorted, smiling.

“Patience is a virtue,” Severus sing songed and Harry snorted.

“For you maybe.”

Severus’ reply was cut off by the appearance of a blonde in the open doorway. “Phoenix? Are you all right?” he asked and she shook her head.

“Can I talk to you? I mean, I know it’s late but you’re up already,” she asked.

“Come on in. Just keep in mind we’re sleep deprived,” Harry said and she smiled, moving forwards and seating herself on the bed.

“What’s on your mind?” Harry asked.

She drew up her knees and rested her chin on them, trying to figure out the best way to ask.

“Why won’t Sirius let me sleep with Charlie? He lets you sleep with Severus, why can’t I sleep with Charlie?” she asked and their jaws dropped. “What? What did I say?”

“Well, I am married to Harry, that has an effect on Sirius’ thinking,” Severus said, recovering first. “And you are a girl now. Things are different.”

She huffed. “Charlie said that, right before Sirius yanked him out of bed and threw him into the hallway. I don’t understand. We were just talking.”

“Phoenix, what do you mean by ‘sleep with Charlie’?” Harry asked, detaching Miri and covering himself, winding her.

“Sleep. Like the kind where you dream. What did you think I meant?” she answered, looking at him like he was mad as he chuckled.

“Ah, I see why you do not understand now. We thought you were referring to sex,” Severus said, watching her jaw drop. “When you were Draco, you could not get pregnant as easily. You can now you are Phoenix.”

“But Charlie said that and I still don’t understand. We aren’t doing anything. Why is it wrong?” she asked.

“Because it is not proper for a teenage girl to share a bed with her boyfriend who is ten years older than her,” Severus explained.

“But you’re old enough to be Harry’s dad…and Hermione is a teenager.”

Severus looked at Harry, searching for help. Harry laughed and shook his head. “Nope. You’re explaining. You’re on your own,” Harry chuckled, Severus glaring at him.

“Potter, you will assist, or so help me I will make the next few days a very mortifying experience for you,” Severus said, reverting back to Scary Professor Snape. It didn’t have quite the same effect anymore. Harry merely laughed harder.

“That doesn’t scare me, not when we’re sitting in bed together.”

Severus scowled. “Slytherin,” he grumbled, and Miri began to laugh as Harry’s amusement reached it’s peak. “Please?”

“All right, I’ll help,” Harry agreed as he held Miri to his other breast, waiting for her giggles to stop before he latched her. He looked at his sister, who was crimson in her embarrassment of Harry’s breasts. He took a deep breath to keep himself from laughing at her. “Phoenix, don’t you remember when Sirius found out about me and Severus? He hit him. And Ron and Hermione are married, but I did hear that Hermione’s dad went a bit bezerk at Ron when he found out about the two of them being together.”

“But why isn’t it proper? All we do is cuddle,” she asked stubbornly.

Harry sighed. She really could be too stubborn sometimes. “Because Sirius is being an overprotective father. He has a daughter now, he’s trying to protect you. And, he doesn’t like the idea of his daughter having sex. Does that make more sense to you?”

“I guess. But I got used to sleeping with Charlie. It doesn’t feel right without him talking to me while I fall asleep,” she said sadly.

“I will talk to Sirius tomorrow. For tonight, you will have to sleep alone,” Severus instructed.

“I suppose I can live with that,” she sighed. “Thank you.”

“Hey, just be grateful it wasn’t Remus who found you. I don’t think his wolf would have taken it as well as Sirius did,” Harry said seriously.

She made her way to the door, pausing to give them another ‘thank you’ before she retired to her own bed once more. Harry dissolved into a fit of laughter and Severus sighed in relief, his head falling back against the pillows.

“Nicely handled, Mr Potter. Ten points to Slytherin,” Severus teased.

“Shut it. I did better than you. And, personally, I think Remus’ wolf would be tame compared to you if it had been Miri with her boyfriend you had caught,” Harry teased back, Severus’ face darkening with anger.

“You are right, of course. I would tear the swine limb from limb,” Severus snarled in all seriousness.

“Kind of the way you wanted to kill Bill?” Harry asked, looking up at him through his fringe innocently as he winded Miri.

“Exactly. No one is good enough for either augur,” he insisted stubbornly, holding Miri’s little fist.

Harry groaned. “I forgot about that.”

He lifted Miri and peered at her face, turning her this way and that. She peered back, making a grab for his nose. Severus plucked her out of Harry’s hands and sat her on his raised knee, his hands around her ribs. She babbled at him as he tapped his foot to make her bounce.

“She doesn’t look any different,” Harry observed. “Are you and Sol sure she’s an augur?”

“Positive, love. You saw the little display. Albus thinks that Miri has been doing it since she was born. Mad-Eye will come and test her properly in a few days.” Severus paused, staring at his husband. “This worries you, doesn’t it?”

“I don’t want her to be any more different than she has to be. She’s already different by having me as a carrier. I just feel that this is going to make it harder on her,” Harry explained, leaning back against his chest and stroking Miri’s nose, tapping the end to make her laugh.

“Different is what she is. She’s the daughter of the ‘famous Harry Potter’. Plus, she is the child of a hermaphrodite. As you said when she was born, she made history. She won’t stand out too much, the Wizarding World will accept her for what she is,” Severus reassured.

“They didn’t accept me,” Harry replied quietly. “I was different because of being raised by the Dursley’s. The Prophet either praised me or tore me to pieces. And people kept expecting things of me because I was the ‘famous Harry Potter’, the bloody Boy-Who-Lived. I don’t want that for her.”

“I accept you.”

“You didn’t in the beginning,” Harry argued.

“No. In the beginning, I just saw you as the son of the man who once exposed my underwear to the rest of the school. I was clouded by my own petty hatred,” Severus admitted. “But I got past that. I finally forgave your father for what happened between us and I learned to see you for who you really are. I accept you now.”

“I know, and that’s all that matters to me now, that you love me and accept me for who I am. I have you and Miri and a wonderful family who love and accept me.” He sighed as Miri gripped his finger. “She’ll be accepted, I know that, it’s just…”

“Just what, love?” Severus asked, smiling at Miri’s babbles.

“You’ll think I’m being silly,” he replied, taking Miri from him, bringing her to his chest so he could cuddle her. Severus’ arms came around them both and a gentle hand tilted his head back so a sweet kiss could be pressed to his lips.

“I will not think you are being silly unless you say something like Miri turning out to be a Hufflepuff is your big worry,” Severus soothed and Harry laughed.

“No, I couldn’t care less about her house, as long as she’s happy in it.”

“So? What is the problem?”

Harry stroked the downy curls, kissing the top of her head as she began to fall asleep against him. “What if something happens to her? Something like what the Ministry did to Sol?” he asked, holding his daughter closer at the mere thought of it. Severus smiled down at him softly. “You think it’s silly, right?”

“No, it think that it is every parents worry that something will happen to their child. I think your concerns are warranted. I worry about it happening to her also. But the new laws surrounding Sol will be applied to Miri. Miri will be protected under them, no one will be allowed to touch her. And our daughter will have better training than my sister did. Solarin has agreed to train her with Moody, and Hermione is a walking encyclopaedia,” he reassured. “This little augur is well protected, Harry. You just have to remember Remus with her this morning to know that. No one will let anything happen to her.”

“What about Lucius? Do you think he’ll care about the law?” Harry argued, Miri whining in her sleep.

“Lucius will be caught before long, he cannot run forever. And you are forgetting that your child is a girl. Lucius did not want Phoenix, I doubt he will want Miri.” 

Harry was silent and Severus let him be, let him work through his own thoughts. The thought of Lucius scared him too, if he was honest, but he would never admit that to his green eyed elfin beauty. Harry needed him to be the strong one, so it was not a wise idea to reveal to Harry that he was desperately afraid of what Lucius was capable of. 

The two of them had once been friends; he had even trusted him enough, once upon a time, to let him near Solarin. Lucius had been the one he had turned to when Voldemort had become too much to bear and he had desired to leave. He had known that he could count on the blond aristocrat to both calm him and convince Voldemort that he had been too hard on Severus. After Lucius had calmed the Dark Lord, Severus had been able to enjoy a few days in his good graces, being treated like a child in his fathers favour once more. Severus had found those days the more enjoyable of his servitude. Voldemort would often give him permission to miss the next few meetings during these periods and he would be able to spend a few days, uninterrupted, with Solarin. Lucius had given him that.

Solarin had found Lucius’ manor to be a fairytale castle, in her child’s imagination, and Lucius had indulged her every whim and desire that one summers day when they had gone to visit. But Solarin had made the mistake of glancing into Lucius’ mind. It had scared her far more efficiently than their father had ever done. Severus had not let her near Lucius after that. But Lucius had remained a loyal friend.

After the fall of Voldemort, when they had been two of the few Death Eaters to manage to keep themselves out of Azkaban, Severus had assumed that Lucius would settle, become a normal member of society. How wrong he had been. If he had just had the sense to look past Lucius’ pretty words he would have figured out that his apparent ‘settling’ was just a clever ruse to hide his confinement of Severus’ beloved Harry.

And now Lucius seemed to be completely out of control. His actions denoted that he was no longer sane, and even if he was, Severus feared for what he would do next. It was this fear that had made him talk Harry away from the idea of taking Miri to Diagon Alley a few days ago. Severus had almost refused to allow Harry to take her to St Mungo’s, but he had regained his sense just in time. 

He considered Hermione’s parents. Those poor people had died because of Lucius’ insane desire to have a son. Severus couldn’t quite decide if Lucius wanted a son because it would bring him money, or because of some need to prove his masculinity. 

Severus gazed down at his husband and their daughter. Masculinity wasn’t proved by having a son. It was proved by your actions, a man proved it by all the good he did, by the people he loved and how he treated them. It suddenly dawned on him that Lucius was no better than his father.

A father protects his children, he doesn’t hurt them. A man is proved by his actions. And, judging by Lucius’, he was nothing more than a little boy.

“Severus?” Harry’s voice pulled him out of his musings.

“Yes, love?”

“Where were you just now?”

“Thinking. Just thinking, love. Just wondering what on earth has happened to Lucius.”

“What do you mean?” Harry asked cautiously.

Severus sighed. “Put Miri in her crib and I will share my thoughts with you,” he agreed and he gathered his thoughts as Harry left the room. He lay back and cradled Harry to him as he returned.

“Lucius used to be very rational. He took care of me, in a sense, when I was a Death Eater. When the Dark Lord began to take real delight in…causing me pain, he would intervene, and I would be allowed to spend a few days away from my servitude. I was allowed to spend a whole month with Solarin once. Lucius was calm and collected, he always thought through his plans, never acted without good reason. Aside from his activities as a Death Eater, he never acted outside the law. Lucius used to be my friend.”

“So, what changed?” Harry asked, his head pillowed on the broad chest. He ran his finger over the faded Dark Mark, tracing it as Severus stroked his hair. “When did he begin to be less rational?”

“When you defeated the Dark Lord. He and I were some of the few Death Eaters who escaped imprisonment. I did think he would settle, that he would create a more respectable position for himself. I had begun to believe it. I was wrong. He fooled me,” Severus finished quietly, feeling ashamed. “He told me that he was working on a new book, that it was a cautionary tale of how not to end up in the service of a mad man. I believed him. I think I trusted his words mostly because I wanted to. I really wanted to believe that he had found a way to be a normal wizard, the way I had. He fed me a whole tale of his latest work when all the time he was…was…”

“It’s all right, you don’t have to say it,” Harry said, stroking his stomach. “It doesn’t matter now. I’m yours, that’s all that matters.”

“Poor Hermione,” Severus sighed, holding Harry tighter to him. “That poor girl. I should have seen his madness sooner. If I had, none of this would have happened. You never would have had to go through that, the birth of Hermione’s children would not be marred by her parents deaths. If I had just seen through his lies, none of this would have happened.”

“You see it now. I belong to you now, and I always will. None of this is your fault, he’s very good at putting his point across. And Hermione will be all right. She’s tougher than she looks. Dumbledore’s Army was all her idea, you know,” Harry informed and Severus looked at him in surprise, Harry raising his head to smile at him. “Did you think it was my idea?”

“I was under that impression, yes. Hermione devised it?”

“Yes. And Neville found the Room of Requirement. I was just the teacher. Frankly, I’m amazed I had any students as most of the wizarding population felt me to be a liar at the time. But Ron and Hermione were always on my side. Hermione is a smart witch, she’ll soon see the blessings she has in her life, like Catherine and Joseph,” Harry explained. “You can’t blame yourself for this, no more than I can blame myself for what Lucius did to me, or Phoenix can blame herself. None of us are to blame except Lucius. You told me that, remember? Or were you lying to me?”

“I have not lied to you, love. And you are right. None of us are to blame. This is all Lucius’ fault. I will just feel better when he is caught,” Severus said, kissing Harry on his scar, making him smile. 

“Do you remember the polyjuice incident in my second year?” Harry asked, smiling when his head bounced with Severus’ snort of agreement. His distraction was working, he could just feel it in the way Severus’ body had begun to relax under him.

“I didn’t make it.”

“Excuse me?”

“I didn’t brew the polyjuice. I let off the firework that went into the cauldron, the one that splattered everyone with Swelling Solution,” Harry admitted, tempting his husband with one of the more juicy mysteries he had wondered about.

“That was you? Why did you let off the firework?” Severus asked, amused at the information being so freely given to him, all thoughts of Lucius fading from his mind.

“To create a diversion so Hermione could sneak into your private potions store. We needed boomslang skin and bicorn horn. Are you going to get Dumbledore to expel me?” Harry asked cheekily as Severus laughed.

“No, not today, Potter. I would rather my husband did actually sit his N.E.W.T.’s. Why did you need polyjuice, anyway?”

“We thought Draco was the Heir of Slytherin,” he admitted and Severus dissolved into disbelieving howls of laughter. “It was the most logical way to go, the way he kept going on about Mudbloods.”

Severus spent the next few minutes laughing, clutching Harry to him through his amusement. As he quietened, he pulled Harry up for a kiss, letting his lips graze his cheek, his nose and his eyelids before finally resting on his scar.

“You know, I’m sure you could have the scar removed if you so desired. Now that the Dark Lord is gone, I am sure it could be removed,” Severus suggested, pulling back and sighing as Harry settled against his chest again.

“I don’t want to. I want to keep it.”

“I thought you disliked it.”

“No, I dislike the attention it brings me. I got it when he killed my parents. It’s kind of a reminder of them for me, a reminder that I can never misplace or have taken away,” Harry said simply and Severus kissed him on it again. “And I like it when you kiss it.”

Severus smirked. “I know,” he said, kissing it once more.

Harry hummed his contentment. “Poor Phoenix. I don’t think she’ll ever forgive Narcissa,” Harry mused. “Did you see the way she pulled away when Lady Malfoy tried to hug her?”

“I did, though she is just Narcissa Black now, not Lady Malfoy. She gave up that title when she divorced that man. No, I don’t think Phoenix will forgive her either. What her father did was one thing, but Narcissa’s actions are another. I do not believe she can forgive her for them, I do not believe any of us can.” He chuckled. “Sirius must be mellowing in his old age. I cannot fathom why he offered her a place here.”

“He must have his reasons.” Harry sighed. “Have you noticed that we seem to have found quite a few birth parents that are bloody useless?”

“I had noticed that. But I feel it makes us all the more thankful for the good ones. And, of course, it increases the appreciation of the parents that were taken by choice,” Severus reasoned and Harry hummed his agreement against his chest, snuggling closer to him.

They rearranged themselves, both knowing that they would only find true rest in their usual spooning position. 

Severus smiled at the way his lover snuggled further into his embrace before turning his head for a sleepy kiss. Severus obliged, taking comfort in the fact that Harry was safe, that he belonged to him. Harry was safe in his arms, Miri was safe in her crib and the whole house was filled with their family. 

As he fell asleep, Severus had the stray thought flit briefly through his head of what would be sent next to test them.

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Sirius rolled over, intending to wrap his arms around his husband, to find the bed empty. He sat up and looked around, noticing that the door to their room was wide open. 

“Remus?” he called out as he eased himself from the warm bedding. He donned his robe and padded down the hallway. He slipped into the bathroom and sighed as he saw Remus bent over the toilet, throwing up. He moved forwards and knelt behind him, rubbing his back.

“Are you all right?” he asked as Remus pulled back, sweaty and gasping.

“Flaming Wolfsbane,” Remus rasped. “I’m all right. The potion is just playing havoc with my insides. I’ve been throwing up every morning for a week, ever since the full moon.”

“Maybe we should talk to Severus about it. He brewed the potion for you, he might know what’s wrong,” Sirius suggested, handing him a glass of water to rinse his mouth. He plucked it out of his hand as he retched again. “Is there anything I can get you?” Sirius asked, rubbing his back again.

“No,” Remus ground out. “Just stay with me.”

Sirius smiled and rubbed his back as another wave broke, forcing his stomach to empty itself. When it was all over, Remus fell back into his arms, shaking and sweating.

“We need to talk to Severus. During the moon, I didn’t have as much control as I usually do, and then that whole business with Miri. Maybe the measurements of the ingredients were off, not that I’m questioning Severus’ skill. He is very good at his job. But I can’t help feeling that maybe the potion was off. I’ve never had problems with it before,” Remus panted, gripping at the arms around him.

Sirius kissed his hair. “That might be it. Or it may be that you are developing an immunity to it. You may need a different potion, honey,” Sirius offered.

“Perhaps.”

They sat there for a few minutes before they eased themselves into the shower. It was nothing like their usual morning routine of hot steamy sex, one of them lifted up and fucked hard against the tiled wall. That mornings shower was caring, Remus letting Sirius cleanse him, treating him to his more tender side, caressing every inch of him. Remus loved moments like that, when Sirius showed him just how much he loved him, how precious he was to him.

His new problems with the Wolfsbane potion didn’t scare him too much, not when he had Sirius with him.

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Harry wandered into the kitchen to find Solarin sitting at the table alone. It was a rare occurrence; Harry had begun to believe that she and Bill were joined at the hip. She looked slightly ill, and she was shuffling a pack of cards.

“Can I play?” he asked, sitting down opposite her. She stared at him in surprise.

“What?” she asked, her hands still moving like a nervous tic.

“The cards. Can I play?” he said, motioning to her hands.

She peered down at them and then back up, smiling at him. “They are not the kind of cards you play games with,” she said gently. “They are to see the future. Moody gave them to me when I was very young.”

“Like tarot cards?”

“Kind of, but these are specifically for augurs. Miri will get a pack when she’s old enough to use them,” she said with a smile, looking at his empty arms. “Where is the little miracle?”

“Asleep in her crib.”

“Ah. It’s just odd to see you with your hands free.”

“She’s settling better. I think it’s because it’s calmer now.”

“She doesn’t have any strong barriers yet, she has no control. It will get easier as she develops,” she assured. “She’s a lucky girl, she has lots of people to help her to learn her limits.”

“You have limits?” he asked with a smile. “And here I was thinking that you were invincible.”

“Pipe down,” she scolded with a grin. “I have my limits, and I know them very well, thank you very much. Just because you don’t know them doesn’t mean that they are not there.” She cut the deck and resumed her shuffling. “Where is everyone?”

“Gone to see Hermione. I thought it was best to stay behind, she might not do well with too many people. Severus stayed too, he’s with Sirius and Remus, something about the Wolfsbane potion. Did Bill stay?”

“Bill went to Gringotts. He’s getting restless so it’s best if he goes back to work. How is Hermione?” 

“I spoke to Ron this morning, he said she’s doing pretty well, all things considered. The healers are finally considering letting her come home.”

She nodded and Harry got the impression that she was distracted. It surprised him. As far as he knew, she didn’t get distracted by anything except Bill, and even that was only once in a blue moon.

“Are you okay? You seem distracted,” he asked, pouring himself a glass of orange juice.

“I’m fine but you are right, I am a little distracted.”

“Not those infernal cards again,” Severus said as he entered the room, followed by Sirius and Remus. Harry was worried by how ill Remus looked, but Sirius didn’t seem too worried so he put it down to the last full moon only being a week ago. “You’re wrong more often than you’re right.”

She stuck out her tongue at him. “You’re still sore about that?” she asked.

“Sore about what?” Severus asked dismissively, pretending to be clueless of what she was insinuating as he sat down next to her.

“It was one time, Sevus. And I was close, you have to give me that.”

“You would have been right instead of merely close if you had paid attention to your lessons,” he scolded.

“Probably, but those lessons were boring.”

“Childish attitude to your gift,” he said lightly.

“All right, I’ll say it! You were right, I should have done as I was told. If I had I wouldn’t struggle with it now. You were right,” she admitted and a pleased smile spread across the mans face.

“Most wonderful three words in the English language. It is so very satisfying when you say things like that,” he gloated and she slapped him round the head. It didn’t diminish the smile.

“Care to explain?” Remus said, sitting down wearily in his seat with a glass of water and a few crackers.

“When I was young, I had these lessons that were supposed to help me focus my ability to see the future. Well, I hated the lessons and now I’m terrible at it,” she explained, glaring at the smug look on Severus’ face. “He’s right, I am more often wrong than right.” Severus hummed in agreement.

“And the cards?” Remus asked.

“Moody gave them to me. They’re meant to help me see through the mist. I haven’t picked them up for a while, though.”

“Why now?” Sirius asked, Remus leaning his head against his shoulder..

“I have this nagging feeling. It happens when something big is about to happen. The last few times I’ve ignored it, but this time it’s giving me a migraine. So, I dug out the cards,” she said as she slapped them down in front of Severus. He glared at her.

“Remus, are you okay? You don’t look very well,” Harry asked.

“I’m fine, it’s just a few after effects of the moon,” Remus said with a warm smile. “I will be fine, do not trouble yourself.”

Harry smiled at him, nodding, and turned his attention to the bickering going on between his husband and sister-in-law.

“Just shuffle the cards,” Solarin insisted.

“I am not touching those,” he insisted. “You are not reading me.”

“So, you are still sore then?” she teased. “Or are you afraid of what I might see?”

“I am neither sore nor afraid. I am just refusing to be read.”

“But the cards are telling me that it must be you,” she argued.

“Read someone else first and I may consent,” he bargained and she sighed in annoyance, picking up the cards once more and shuffling. 

“Fine. Do I have any takers?” she asked, looking around.

“Tell us what Severus is sore about and I’ll do it,” Sirius said, Severus glaring at him.

She giggled. “I once told him that he would end up with his great enemy. We managed to interpret it a little more and I proclaimed that he would be very happy with James Potter.” They all laughed and Severus went a little pink. “I was close. I was only off by one generation of Potter.”

“Yes, yes. You were close,” Severus admitted.

She slapped the cards down in front of Sirius and instructed him to shuffle them until he felt it time to stop. He shuffled them for a few moments before handing them back. She fanned them out and plucked six of them, seemingly at random, placing them in a cross shape on the table, face down. She turned them over, one by one, looking at them curiously. Harry noticed that each card held the image of a different household object. One of them was a table, another a bed. There was also a cupboard and what looked like a pair of shoes.

“Ouch, not a happy spread,” she muttered.

“Do not take it too seriously, she is not a very good seer,” Severus warned the animagus, earning him a glare from his sister. “I was merely observing, based on your past predictions.”

“Well, I see much physical pleasure in your future, and a happy family, but there is a dark shadow hanging over it all. There is the whisper of trials ahead, and a loss,” she proclaimed.

“A loss?” Sirius asked.

“Yes. It might be someone travelling far away, or a death, I can’t be certain. Sorry, Sirius, but that is about as clear as it gets. I’m sorry I can’t give a better reading,” she soothed. “As Severus said, I’m usually wrong.” He appeared shaken but he nodded at her, offering a shaky smile as he slipped an arm around Remus’ shoulders.

“What was the last one you got right?” Harry asked.

“It was a long time ago,” she dodged and Harry knew it was not a subject to press as Severus shook his head.

“So, will you let me read you now, Sevus? Please?” she asked and he let out a world weary sigh before he nodded. She gathered up the cards and shuffled them before setting them in front of her brother. He muttered something about being insane as he picked them up and began to shuffle. As he did so, the members of the house who had gone to visit Hermione began to emerge through the floo. They all settled down, getting explanations of the scene from Harry, and still Severus continued to shuffle. Harry noticed that Narcissa had chosen a seat by the fireplace, away from everyone else.

After what seemed an age he finally pressed them into her hands. Harry observed her hands were shaking as she spread them out, plucking them and arranging only four in a square. She glanced up, her eyes unseeing, the whites of her eyes completely taken over by black, and Severus sat up straighter in alarm. 

It was no longer a game, watching what she could see. She was seeing something else, something far away, and it was making Severus uneasy. 

“Severus? What’s happening?” Harry asked as she glanced up at him, her black eyes swirling red, the same way they had when she had stopped Severus and Bill killing Kingsley.

“Call Moody, call him now,” Severus commanded and Molly moved to the fireplace, Moody coming through after only a minute.

Moody took one look at her and took a seat, apparently waiting for something. 

“Alastor, what is happening?” Severus asked.

“Her gift is finally maturing. She is seeing the future, at long last. This prediction will not be wrong, Severus. Her others may be, but this one will be true. Give her time to see, let her watch it. She will come back to us when it is over, when she has learnt all she needs to. We wait until it has passed on its own,” Moody instructed. “Molly, could I trouble you for some tea?”

They waited, watching her hands skim over the cards, arranging them in some weird pattern, seemingly without order or reason. Severus appeared to be fighting the urge to try and pull her out of it, and Bill, when he returned, panicked at her state.

After an hour of her blank stare, she blinked and collapsed back into her chair, gasping. Severus, who had been pacing with Bill, reached her before the redhead and moved to touch her but she held up her hand.

“Don’t touch me, not yet. Let it pass,” she said shakily and Sirius placed a glass of water in front of her as the two of them backed off slightly. She took a sip of it and coughed as it hit her throat. The second sip was more successful.

“Solarin?” Harry said. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. It was just a little…intense. And unexpected,” she said, waving his concerns away with her hand.

“What did you see?” Moody asked, and Harry was surprised by her acceptance of him, as if she had known he was there all along.

“I don’t know. It’s fuzzy. It doesn’t make any sense,” she admitted and Moody placed a vial of red liquid in front of her. 

“It will clear your head, make it easier for you to put it in some kind of order,” he instructed. “As soon as Molly told me what you were doing I knew you would need it.”

She nodded and chucked it down, grimacing at the taste. It seemed to help, because she began to describe what she had seen.

“It was here, in Grimmauld Place. It was bright, so I think it was daytime. We were all sitting around the table. It was something about Severus, something he needs to learn. There was another reason for it, something about Remus, some kind of warning. I can’t make the rest clear.”

“That is because it cannot be clear until it is lived,” Moody explained. “Just tell us what you got.”

“For Severus I got a hidden past, a secret long kept. It was told to save a family, to ease a mind. Deception not easily forgiven. A face from the past, long pushed aside but never forgotten. Resolution, but no peace. A choice made. A truth uncovered but not understood. A passing, a loss,” she reeled off, Severus’ face becoming more and more confused with every word.

She glanced at Remus, the werewolf staring at her, waiting for what she would tell him. “A new start, it is unexpected, unplanned for. Trials ahead, tough choices to make. A love, greater than ever anticipated. A shadow, something dark and unknown, it is sent to test you. A choice not easy to make, but needed.”

“What does it mean, Mad-Eye?” Severus questioned, Solarin finally letting Bill hold her. He reached forwards and stroked her hair. The augur looked exhausted but her eyes kept darting to the odd formation of cards.

“We have no way of knowing until we live it. The other predictions she makes can be changed, this one cannot. This one will come to pass. Other premonitions she has revealed in the past have been unfixed, this one is set in stone. It cannot be deciphered until it happens,” Moody explained. “It may not be as bleak as it seems, she is only telling us what she knows.”

“And sounding like Trelawney in the process,” Solarin put in. “It sounds pretty bleak.”

“But it may not be what it appears to be.”

“There was something else, another mind with mine. I think it was Miri,” she said and Harry shot up, making his way quickly up the stairs, not stopping until he reached his daughters crib. She was still sound asleep, but a tiny trickle of blood dripped down her face from her nose. 

Severus came up behind him. “She saw what Sol saw,” Severus said as Harry reached in to pick her up, holding her close.

“Is she all right?” Harry asked, Miri twitching in her sleep at his worry.

“She appears to be. We will take her down to Mad-Eye, he will know,” Severus reassured and the two of them made their way back to the kitchen.

They handed Miri to Moody and Harry curled himself into Severus’ embrace, watching the grizzled wizard run several spells on the tiny girl. Harry couldn’t breathe, he just couldn’t, not until Moody told him his baby was unharmed. Severus rubbed his back, the dark eyes glued to the sleeping child.

“She’s fine, she slept through the whole thing. She was merely a hitchhiker. The bleed is from her mind going beyond its limits, it is nothing to worry about,” Moody proclaimed, passing her back to Harry.

“You’re sure she’s all right?” Solarin asked from her seat.

“Perfectly. She’ll be a little grouchy because she doesn’t understand what happened, but she is fine.”

Harry breathed a sigh of relief and Miri smiled in her sleep. Since Moody had tested Miri, Harry had been unable to stop worrying. Moody had proclaimed her powerful, but unguarded. Severus had translated that Miri was strong enough to pick up emotions and hear random thoughts but she would be unable to block any of it for the time being. Over the next few months her barriers would begin to develop, and then it would get easier, but until then, Harry would have to let it run its course. It had not comforted him, the thought of Miri picking things up. That night he had not slept, he had stood over her crib, watching her dream on, unaware. Moody had told him that Miri would be most attuned to his emotions because he had carried her, and for the last few days he had been careful to keep himself as calm as possible, only letting good emotions take hold, like happiness. But now his fear for her was taking over.

“Severus,” Harry whispered and Severus pulled him more firmly into his arms, whispering soothing words into his ear. Severus used his wand to clean away the blood from Miri and led Harry to a chair, sitting down first and pulling him into his lap. Remus came forwards and held Miri while Severus settled the young Gryffindor, the slim hands bunched in his shirt.

“It’s all right, love, she is all right. It is just a little bump on the road. She will strengthen the barriers soon, it will be all right,” Severus murmured.

“No! I don’t want this for her! Take it away!” Harry argued. “Take it away from her, make it stop!” Miri whined in her sleep at him and his anger at the whole situation grew.

“Harry, we can’t. It is not possible to remove it, it is a part of her. It must run its course.”

“No, I don’t want it. She’s two months old, she shouldn’t be having nosebleeds.”

Harry couldn’t stop, he knew he should, but he couldn’t. He didn’t blame Solarin, or Moody, or any of them. He blamed himself. He felt that if he hadn’t been so special, his daughter would not have to deal with all this.

“I don’t want her to be special, I want her to be a normal little witch. And if Solarin had just dropped it when you refused she wouldn’t be bleeding,” Harry stated simply, turning his accusing stare to his sister-in-law. “This is your fault. If you had just left it alone, my daughter would not be bleeding right now, she would not have had to go through that. Why can’t you just leave it alone?”

Solarin looked like she was about to cry and he felt guilt wash over him. The room was silent and no one offered any kind of argument against him, and it just made him feel worse. He didn’t know what to say anymore, how to apologise, how to explain what was running through his head. Not even Severus was trying to reason with him, and Solarin looked so hurt.

He got to his feet and snatched Miri up from Remus’ arms before storming from the room and up to his bedroom. He charmed the door shut and lay down on his bed, holding his special little girl close and feeling guiltier than he had ever felt in his life.

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Severus broke the charm and peeked around the door a few hours later to find Harry lying on their bed, running his fingertips in little circles over Miri’s tiny round tummy where she lay on her back next to him. He cautiously made his way towards them, sitting down next to Harry’s shins. He carefully laid his hand on the still hip, waiting.

“I didn’t mean that,” Harry mumbled. “I didn’t mean any of it. I shouldn’t have said it. Is Sol okay?”

“She retreated to her bedroom and told Bill to ‘fuck off’. I think it is safe to assume that she feels as guilty as you do right now,” Severus said honestly.

“I’ll go and apologise,” Harry said, beginning to sit up but Severus shook his head.

“We’re going to talk first. You are going to explain this to me,” he said simply, picking Miri up.

“I don’t know how.”

“Try.”

Harry sighed and stared at his daughter. She was waving her little fists around in aggravation and he wasn’t sure if it was his frustration or her own that she was expressing. He knew Severus would not drop this, that he would sit there until Harry talked to him. He also knew that he would not be able to lie, that his husband knew all his tricks of deception after nearly seven years of knowing each other.

“I’m scared,” Harry admitted, deeming it the only place to start. “What if she doesn’t build these barriers? And how the hell are we supposed to raise an augur? I have enough trouble just raising her as a little girl, but now I find out that she’s special and I’m second guessing myself all the more.” The words were spilling forth now, Harry unable to stop them. “I’m not just questioning my skill as a parent any more, I’m questioning my emotions, my thoughts, everything. And every time Miri shows some kind of reaction, I can’t work out if it’s mine or hers. It’s so confusing. And I didn’t mean to lash out like that, especially at Sol. It’s not her fault. It’s mine. If I wasn’t so bloody special, Miri wouldn’t be.” He took a deep breath to try and calm himself, but it didn’t help much. “I’m not old enough for this. I love her, more than anything, but I keep wondering if I did the right thing by keeping her, if maybe she would be better off with someone else. And, of course, that just makes me feel worse because I can’t even imagine living without her.”

Harry snapped his mouth shut and Severus was silent for a few minutes. Harry didn’t know what Severus would say, but he had a theory that he wouldn’t like it. When Severus did eventually speak, Harry was glad that his theories were usually wrong when it came to his husband. 

“When Sol was six months old, I went into her room to find her screaming in her crib. I was fourteen. I had no idea what to do. I checked her over, but there was no reason why she should be crying,” Severus admitted. “I picked her up and began to sing to her. Soon enough, she began to calm and then I heard it. My father beating my mother.”

Harry looked up at him in surprise. Severus didn’t talk of his parents, ever. It was one of the few topics that was off-limits. But here he was, baring his soul to try and ease Harry’s worries.

“When it was over, I found my mother in a terrible state. She refused to go to the hospital. She always did,” Severus continued, his voice quiet and unsure. He took a deep shuddering breath. “When I returned to Hogwarts, I asked Albus of it. It took him a few days but he eventually discovered the problem. It would have been so simple for Solarin to be trained at that young age, she simply had to be immersed into the Wizarding World, surrounded by magical minds. But my father would not allow it.”

Harry sat up and wiped away the tears that had made their way down his husbands pale face.

“Why are you revealing this to me?” Harry asked as Severus composed himself.

“To show you that Miri is in a much better position than Solarin was. She is surrounded my magical minds, which are much stronger and harder to tap into than muggle minds. It will force the barriers to develop. She will have the best training, better than my sister, because she will have an augur to train her,” Severus explained. “Harry, she is already beginning to build her barriers. Give it a few months and she will be tapping in at will instead of at random.”

“All right, I believe you. And I know that she’s got the best possible teachers. I get that one. But I’m still having trouble believing that I’m the right carrier for her. Everything I do for her, I worry if I’ve done it right. Even when you’re helping me,” Harry said sadly. “I just don’t feel like I’m doing a very good job.”

Severus smiled gently at him. “Harry, take her from me,” Severus commanded. Harry gave him a wary glance but did as he was told. 

He peered down at his silent daughter, her big green eyes locked on his. 

“Harry, you are very young. We all understand that. We also understand that you are a first time parent. This is all a learning curve for you. You are going to have doubts, and it is likely that you will make mistakes along the way. I promise you that you are doing the best you can and that is enough. Look at her, love. Does she look unhappy with your performance?”

“No,” Harry admitted. “But it’s still my fault she’s like this. If I wasn’t a hermaphrodite, she wouldn’t be so bloody special. I want this…thing gone.”

“Harry, this is a gift. Our daughter is gifted and, in time, you will come to see it that way. I know that this is hard for you to deal with, that you have your doubts and concerns. But I assure you that this is a gift, not a curse,” Severus said firmly, Harry’s emerald orbs searching his onyx ones. “And I happen to love you, just the way you are. And I feel very blessed that you chose me to be the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. I see this as a gift you have given her.”

Harry blushed slightly and looked down just in time to see Miri let out a huge smile, gurgling at him and giggling, waving her little arms.

“I guess I believe you. But I’m not going to stop worrying about this, not until she has her barriers,” Harry said quietly.

Severus leaned in and kissed him, slow and gentle.

“You’re sure I’m doing okay as her carrier?” Harry asked as he pulled back.

“Positive. You may ask Molly if you still need more reassurance,” he offered but Harry shook his head.

“I believe you. Just tell me that you had trouble with Solarin when she was young,” Harry demanded.

Severus chuckled. “You have no idea. That girl was tougher to handle than the Dark Lord and all the Marauders put together,” he assured. “I wasn’t much older than you when I took full custody of her, and she was only four. It was difficult. She had her own issues about our parents, so she was not an easy child to handle. Couple that with her beginning to experiment with all her abilities and you get an idea of how difficult she was.”

“But I thought you said she started to display at six months old. Why didn’t she experiment with them before?” Harry asked.

“Our father hated magic. He didn’t allow her to experiment. Once she lived solely with me, I gave her free reign, let her do what she wished with her magic, find her own limits.” He snorted. “That lasted all of five minutes. After that she needed to be reigned in slightly, which is where Albus and Mad-Eye came in. The two of them helped me to raise her,” he explained. “Miri is in a much better position, and I am much more confident now.”

“I forget that you’ve done this all before. I must sound like a really neurotic parent to you,” Harry mumbled as Miri stuck her fist in her mouth and began to suck on it.

“No, you sound like me, nineteen years ago.”

Harry chuckled at Miri blowing a raspberry at him as she pulled her fist away. “All right, I’ll try to stop stressing so much,” Harry agreed and leaned in, kissing his husband. “I have you to make sure I don’t screw it up too badly.”

“Yes, you do. And you have many members of family who are all too happy to help,” Severus said, nibbling his ear. “Now, I am going to take Miri down to the kitchen and you are going to apologise to Solarin.”

He plucked Miri from Harry’s arms and smirked at his pout. 

“You know, she could kill me and get away with it. You still want me to go alone?” Harry pointed out.

“She will not kill you. She’s more likely to cry at you at this point. Just go and apologise,” Severus instructed, sweeping from the room.

Harry sighed and hauled himself to his feet, making his way from the room, feeling like he was walking to his own execution. But when he had travelled to the far side of the huge house and let himself into Solarin’s room, he found himself having to fight through her apologies to get his own out. The two of them spent most of the afternoon sharing their worries, and Harry ended up, for a short while, feeling more apprehensive of her premonition than he was of his own parenting skills.

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Severus and Harry walked into the living room to find Solarin asleep on the sofa, her head in Bill’s lap. The curse breaker looked up from the book he was reading and beckoned them in.

“It’s all right, you won’t wake her,” Bill assured. 

“Is she ill? She does not usually sleep during the day. If I recall correctly, she doesn’t sleep very much at all,” Severus asked as he sat down on one of the other sofas, pulling Harry into his lap.

“She’s just a little tired, that whole premonition thing took it out of her. Moody says she’ll be back to her old self in a few days. So, what are you two up to?”

“We are discussing Harry’s seventeenth,” Severus said, Harry sighing in annoyance.

“I already told you, it’s not a big deal,” Harry complained, picking at the hem of his t-shirt.

“Seventeen is a big deal, Harry,” Bill put in as Remus and Sirius joined them. “How’s it going?” he asked the two.

“Albus chucked us out,” Sirius grumbled as the two of them sat down on the sofa with Harry and Severus, Remus pulling Harry’s bare feet onto his lap. He stroked his hands up and down Harry’s bare hairless shins, seemingly needing something to do with his hands. Harry doubted he even realized he was doing it.

Sirius and Remus were twitching in their agitation and no one could blame them. Phoenix was at that very moment having a supervised conversation with Narcissa. It had been Dumbledore’s idea, his way of trying to save the family bond. Remus and Sirius had started out joining them. Apparently, they hadn’t handled it well.

“Why did he deem it necessary for you to leave the room?” Severus asked.

“No reason,” Sirius said guiltily, Remus sniggering.

“He called Narcissa a money grabbing whore and I called her a selfish bitch,” Remus supplied.

“Nice,” Bill commented. “How long do you think it’ll be before he chucks out Charlie as well?”

“Don’t place any bets on that one,” Charlie grumbled as he stormed in, his face like thunder. “Bloody woman. She’s a menace, a bloody menace.”

“Which one, Narcissa or Nixie?” Harry asked cheekily.

“Charlie, you mind keeping it down?” Bill asked, and Charlie stopped in his angry pacing, glancing at the sleeping woman before flopping into an armchair.

“Narcissa. She is just so….” he trailed off, unable to find the word.

“What did you call her?” Sirius asked.

“A banshee.”

“Seems appropriate.”

“We are just discussing Harry’s seventeenth,” Severus distracted. “Care to join the conversation?”

“We are not talking about my birthday. I told you, several times, it is not a big deal,” Harry put in, glaring at his husband.

“Harry, it is your coming of age, it is a big milestone. Why do you not want to celebrate it?” Remus asked. He and Sirius were looking forward to celebrating his birthday with him, and Molly was already planning his cake.

“I don’t want anyone making a fuss,” Harry mumbled, ducking his head. 

“Harry, this is the first birthday we will have with you since the adoption was finalized. And it is the first since you were rescued. Let us make a fuss,” Sirius coerced. “Please?”

“You really want to?”

“We really want to.”

Harry sighed. He had learnt to pick his battles, and this was one that he would not win, he could just tell by the determination in his husband. “Fine, I suppose I can let you make a fuss, do the whole parent thing. But I don’t want a great big party, no big crowds of people. I’m doing okay with a load of people in the kitchen, let’s not push it,” Harry bargained.

“Of course not. We were thinking a simple family dinner, with cake. Much like your wedding reception, but with a few more people present,” Remus assured.

Harry nodded and Severus smiled. “What do you want?” Severus asked.

“What do you mean?” Harry asked in confusion.

“As a birthday gift. What would you like?”

“I don’t know. I have everything I really want. I have you and Miri, I have my family around me. I can’t think of anything else,” Harry reasoned, Severus kissing him as the others smiled. He frowned. “There is one thing, but I know I can’t have it.”

“What?” Bill asked.

“My parents,” Harry said sadly. “I guess I’m being silly, but I just kinda…wish that…they could be here.” He buried his head in Severus’ shoulder as the others looked at him in understanding. “I mean, I know I have you guys, but I wish they could be here too.”

“You are not being silly. We understand, pup. We all wish they could be here,” Remus soothed.

Harry’s head shot up, the young Gryffindor chewing his lower lip.

“What’s wrong?” Sirius asked.

“My photo album. I left it at the Dursley’s. I meant to take it to Hogwarts with me for my sixth year. My Firebolt is there too. I forgot all about them,” Harry explained. “The photo album has all my pictures of my mum and dad in it.” His eyes filled with tears. “They’ve probably destroyed them by now. Oh God, my dad’s invisibility cloak is there too. I put it all under the loose floorboard. Hermione shrunk the broom for me at the end of my fifth year, so it would be easier to carry around. I can’t believe I forgot them.”

“We’ll go and check for you. If they are still in one piece we will bring them back with us. If not, we will put together a new album for you and try to replace the broom and cloak,” Remus said, standing up, trying to ease Harry’s concerns. He and Sirius had reached the door when Severus spoke.

“Give Petunia my fondest greetings,” he called out and they looked at him strangely.

“Why would they do that?” Harry asked.

“Your aunt was never very fond of me. She used to call me the ‘weird little boy from Spinners End’. I have my suspicions that her father had a run in with mine once but her dislike of me may have been because of me and Lily,” Severus explained lightly, confused by the way Harry’s eyes had widened in shock.

“You knew my mum when she was young?” Harry whispered.

“Yes, of course. We grew up a few streets from each other. We took the Hogwarts Express together in our first year,” Severus reasoned before realization dawned on him. “You didn’t know.”

Harry shook his head. “No one told me. I knew you went to school together, but I didn’t know you knew her before.” Harry knew that he was crying, but he couldn’t help it. Severus could tell him, he could share with him what his mother was like. He knew so much of his father, but very little of his mother. But now, here it was, every question he had ever had, about to be answered.

“Oh, love, I thought you knew. I thought someone had told you,” Severus said, pulling him in for a hug. “I would have told you had I been aware.” He looked at Sirius and Remus, stock still in the open doorway, unsure of what to do. “Go collect his things, he will be fine.”

They shared a glance before they left, closing the door behind them.

“What do you want to know, love?” Severus asked, stroking the raven tresses.

“Everything. How old was she when you first met? What was she like? Did she like being a witch? Why did my aunt hate her so much? Just tell me everything,” Harry reeled off.

“All right,” Severus agreed as Harry pulled back, watching him. “I first met your mother when we were about eight. We went to the same primary school. I was the object of the bullies attentions and your mother stood up for me. She used to look out for me. She was such a passionate young woman.”

“She was mean to the people who picked on you?”

“No, she merely defended me. Your mother was such a kind girl, she never changed much. She was fiery, kind, intelligent, beautiful. She would have been perfect in my eyes, if I hadn’t preferred males,” Severus said with a smile, Harry blushing. “Lily loved being a witch, and she was a skilled witch too, even before we got to Hogwarts. She was extremely gifted at charms, and she was rather good at potions too. Such a shame you did not inherit that trait.”

“Did you spend a lot of time together at school?” Harry asked, grinning.

“In the beginning we did, but around the end of our third year we began to drift apart. I became very withdrawn, what with the situation at home, and Lily started spending most of her time with your father and his friends. In our fifth year, the underwear incident occurred, when I let my embarrassment take me over. I never meant to call her a Mudblood, I never felt that way for her. However, no matter my apologies, she wouldn’t speak to me after that. Not for the rest of our time at Hogwarts, at least.”

“Why did my Aunt Petunia hate her so much?” Harry asked, remembering the way his aunt had talked of his mother when Hagrid had told him he was a wizard. “Why does she hate me?”

“She didn’t hate her. She was jealous of her,” Severus clarified. “When me and Lily got our letters, Petunia wanted to go as well. She couldn’t, of course, because she was not a witch. She wrote to Albus, asking him if she could go too. Albus sent her a very kind letter, explaining why she could not. Petunia became very angry towards Lily, as far as I know they never made peace.” He kissed him, soothing away his frown. “I am unsure why she dislikes you. It is beyond my reasoning.”

Harry nodded and sat there thinking, mulling it all over. He was about to ask another question, but Bill interrupted him. It made him jump, he had forgotten that they were not alone in the room.

“Charlie, can you go and ask them to calm down?” Bill asked, smoothing Solarin’s hair as she hit out in her sleep.

“Don’t bother,” she said groggily. “I’m awake.” She looked around as she sat up, pushing back her long hair and summoning a hairbrush. It came zooming into her hand and Bill plucked it from her, pulling her against him as he attacked the glossy strands. “What did I miss?”

“We were talking about my mum,” Harry supplied.

“Ah, I see. Didn’t I meet her once?” Solarin asked Severus.

“Twice, when you were very young. The first was not long after I gained custody of you, and we went to a toyshop to get you a doll, so it must have been the winter before your fifth birthday,” Severus said, his brow furrowed in concentration. “If I remember correctly, you turned her hair blue.”

Solarin laughed. “That’s right! I did! She found it hilarious.”

“I did not,” he scolded. “But I did see the funny side eventually. It was your blue phase, you were turning everything blue.”

“I thought it looked better than her dark red,” she reasoned with a smile.

“Auburn,” he corrected automatically.

“My mum met Solarin?” Harry asked Severus.

“Twice. The first time, Lily and I were less than a year out of Hogwarts. Sol and I had just moved into this tiny little cottage in Hogsmeade. I wrote to Lily, explaining my withdrawal and my actions, apologising. She came to visit one Saturday afternoon. Your father was off somewhere, his whereabouts that day escape me now, it was so long ago. The minute Lily walked through the door, Sol turned her hair blue. Uncontrolled magic. Well, at four years old, it should have been uncontrolled. I was still giving her free reign with it at the time, so she was rather good at transfiguring things,” Severus described.

“She smelled of some kind of flower. She sat next to me at the table, we coloured together,” Solarin interjected, frowning as she tried to remember.

“Lilies. She wore a perfume that smelled of lilies. James gave it to her for her birthday.”

“That’s right. I thought it was pretty, I thought she was.” She laughed. “She coloured with me and still managed to talk to you. I remember being very impressed. Albus couldn’t do both at the same time. She smiled a lot,” she said with a sad smile. “I thought her eyes were pretty.”

“You told her they were like gummy bears. The green ones were your favourite. You shared your bag of them with her,” Severus put in, remembering for her. “I had terrible trouble trying to find toys for you. I was a seventeen year old boy, I had no idea what to get you, what was appropriate. We went to a toyshop and Lily helped me find a doll. When you hugged the doll, it hugged you back. She kept you distracted while I purchased it and had it wrapped. We all went to the Three Broomsticks for dinner, do you remember?”

“Yes. I still have that doll,” she revealed. “It sits on my dresser. It doesn’t hug back anymore, but it was the first birthday I had with just you, so I kept the doll. It even went to Hogwarts with me.”

She wandlessly summoned it and it came zooming in, landing in Harry’s hands. It was a little battered, but obviously well loved. 

“The dress isn’t the one the doll came with, the original was yellow. This dress came later. It was a gift from your mother,” Severus put in, fiddling with the white lace trim of the blue dress.

“Really?” Harry asked, stroking his fingers over the worn fabric. “When was this?”

“The second time Lily met Solarin, just after your first birthday,” Severus replied. “Albus arranged for her to be able to bring you to Hogwarts, so she could show off her son to me. She was very proud of you. You had just learnt to walk.”

“You…you met me as…as a baby?” Harry breathed, disbelieving. 

“You see, I thought you knew all of this. I was sure that Sirius or someone had told you. If I had known you were unaware, I would have disclosed it to you long ago,” Severus said, his face a mask of concern.

“You’re telling me now,” Harry reasoned. “I know now. So, you met me?”

“Yes. You were such an inquisitive little boy. You had just learnt to walk, so you were in everything.” He chuckled, glancing at Solarin. “Sol wanted to dress you up and play with you, she thought you were a doll.”

“I did not!” she replied indignantly. “Did I?”

“You did. You had a doll that walked and talked, so you didn’t see the difference. You were only young, it was an easy mistake.” His brow furrowed in concentration. “I had cared for you for three years, so you were about seven at the time. Yes, you and Harry have a six year age gap, so you must have been seven. It was after Harry’s first birthday, and there were no students at Hogwarts, they had gone home for the holidays. It was sometime in august, I believe.”

He smiled and eased himself out from under Harry, proclaiming he would be right back. Harry curled up and stared at Solarin’s doll, running his fingers over the little blue dress. Here it was, tangible proof his mother had lived, a solid something that he could touch, something she had once touched. He had proof, he had something he could point to and say ‘my mum bought that’. He had his way to prove she did walk the earth once. Now he knew why Solarin had seemed familiar to him when he first met her.

“Found it,” Severus proclaimed as he re-entered, clutching a battered photo album. “It was buried in the bottom of my trunk. I forgot all about it.”

He flicked through the pages as he sat down, pulling Harry back onto his lap.

“Did you check on Miri while you were up there?” Harry asked.

“I did. She is still sleeping,” Severus replied. “Here it is.”

He pushed the book into Harry’s hands and pointed to a picture. It was of the Hogwarts grounds, near the Quidditch pitch. Severus was there, much younger than he was now, smiling, and a tiny Solarin, only as tall as his knee. Apparently, she had always been short. There was his mother, climbing all over Severus as if to annoy him. And there he was, toddling about, pulling at Solarin’s hair. His own hair had been messy, even then.

“Albus took it for us. Your mother had a copy of it. See, love? She was here. She loved you,” Severus murmured in his ear as photo-Lily ran after a toddling photo-Harry, scooping him up and kissing his cheek as he smiled and clapped.

Severus turned the page and pointed at another picture. This one was of a tiny Severus and Lily, standing proudly in front of Hagrid’s hut, photo-Lily playfully tugging on his hair. “Our first year. Hagrid took the photo. Lily had just saved me from James’ teasing and Hagrid thought it was appropriate to commemorate the moment.”

It went on like that, Severus pointing out different pictures, telling him the stories behind them. At the end, when there were no more new ones to show him, Severus removed all the photo’s containing Lily and copied them with a spell, handing the copies to Harry.

Harry sat there, curled into Severus’ embrace, the doll in his arms, gazing at the pictures. His mother had smiled a lot, and everyone was right when they said he had her eyes. He gazed at himself as a baby, poking at little Solarin’s nose. Miri looked just like he did, and she seemed to be as playful as he had been. He felt his heart tug as he considered that his mother would never meet his daughter, that she would not get to hold her. He would not be able to share this family he had built for himself with her. She would never know how happy he was just being him, never know what Severus had shown him, taught him, given him.

“My mum never told anyone about me? Not even Dumbledore? She never told anyone what I am?” Harry asked, just as Sirius and Remus re-entered the room.

“No one, love. Your parents were probably trying to protect you. Considering the ease of which you can be claimed, it seems the most logical assumption,” Severus replied, turning to look at Sirius and Remus. “Did you manage to get his things?”

“Yes, we got them. Petunia had put them all in a box in the cupboard under the stairs,” Sirius said as they dug in their pockets, resizing Harry’s things. First came the Firebolt, then the cloak, and finally his photo album. 

Harry grinned and thanked them before opening the book, easing his new pictures into their new places. He felt a deep sense of satisfaction as he looked at them, proudly showing it to Severus.

“Petunia did indeed remember you, Severus,” Remus said with a grin. “She said that you were a disgrace to the species.”

“Definitely remembers me,” Severus chuckled.

“She did give us something else that belongs to Harry. She said she wanted all traces of him out of her house,” Remus said, resizing a shoe box. “These are the things he had with him when he was left with them.”

Harry pulled off the lid and pulled out a blue blanket, followed by a baby grow patterned with yellow ducks, and finally a worn looking envelope. He set aside the letter, he had no desires to read it. But he ran his fingers over the soft wool of the blanket, picking at a loose stitch.

“Did these come from Godric’s Hollow, from my house?” he asked quietly, his eyes fixed to the blanket.

“Yes. I remember Lily knitting that when she was carrying you,” Sirius enlightened. “She was so convinced you were going to be a boy, she decided on Harry as your name before you were even born.”

Harry smiled at it, his mother had appliquéd a bright red soft felt ‘H’ on to the blanket. 

He had gotten what he wanted for his birthday, his family had given him his mother.

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Harry awoke to Severus kissing his neck, nibbling at it in the way that made him shiver. He hummed his appreciation and rolled over to let his husband at his lips. Severus kissed him deep, their tongues duelling. Harry gave up the fight and let Severus dominate, loving the way Severus could take charge of him and still be gentle.

“Good morning to you too,” Harry said as Severus finally let him up for air. His husband propped himself up on one elbow and stared down at him, his hand on Harry’s stomach. “You’re in a good mood.”

“You should be too. Miri slept the whole night,” Severus informed. “It is seven thirty.”

Harry glanced at the clock, his smile wide as he realized how well rested he felt. He stretched and moaned at the delicious way his muscles flexed. 

“You’re right, I am in a good mood now,” he admitted and Severus smiled at him. “How long has it been now?”

“Nine, nearly ten weeks.”

“God, really? That is a very long time,” Harry giggled. “She is such a good girl for finally giving us a full night.”

“Indeed. But she is wide awake now,” Severus said, nodding at the monitor. Harry heard Miri’s babbles coming through it and laughed.

“I suppose it’s only fair that we both go and get her, she did sleep for us,” Harry said, easing himself from the bed, Severus following him.

Harry made his way into the yellow room, the morning sun making it an even more happy colour. He leaned in and picked up his daughter, kissing her cheek as she grabbed the collar of his t-shirt.

“Good morning, sweetheart. Who was a very good girl last night?” he asked and she squealed at him. He chuckled and passed her to Severus so he could rid himself of his t-shirt and open his bra. 

He settled himself in the rocking chair and retrieved her, smiling as she latched on immediately.

“You go shower and dress while I feed her. Then you can take her while I get ready,” Harry instructed, smiling into the kiss Severus gave him before he left. He fed her and then bathed her before dressing her in a pair of yellow dungarees with a pale pink t-shirt, the tiny augur smiling and gurgling at his good mood as he dressed her. He handed her to Severus with a kiss and made his way to the bathroom.

Harry thoroughly enjoyed his shower and was finally able to rid himself of his bra as his breasts had, at long last, stopped feeling like they were about to explode. He still had the slight swell of them making his shirt stick out slightly, but he didn’t mind. He still needed them so he could live with it. He made his way down to the kitchen to find it full. He smirked at how tired Ron and Hermione looked, though he was impressed that Hermione could hold both twins at the same time.

“Good morning,” he said brightly as he took his seat.

“What’s good about it?” Ron grumbled, his eyelids drooping. “Question, why do they both have to start screaming at the same time? And why can’t they go more than two hours without needing something?”

Harry stifled his laughter as Hermione shoved one of the twins at him, giving him a look that could cause death.

“It gets easier,” Harry offered. “Miri slept the whole night last night. I, for one, feel very refreshed.”

“Lap it up,” Ron grumbled, which earned him a slap around the head from his wife.

“They’re only babies. They need us, Ronald. Stop complaining about fatherhood or you may find yourself on the sofa,” Hermione warned. Her temper had become very short since she had given birth, and Ron was usually on the receiving end. “I’m happy for you, Harry. It’ll be nice to have a full night.”

Harry grinned and set to his breakfast. Ginny was sitting at one end of the table, tickling Miri so both he and Severus had their hands free to enjoy a peaceful breakfast. Harry felt very content until he noticed how unwell Remus looked.

“Are you still feeling no better, Remus?” Harry asked.

“No. I have an appointment with a healer in a few weeks, he’ll soon discover the problem,” Remus assured. “I’m sure it’s just a bug or something.”

“Hopefully, it is not my Wolfsbane,” Severus put in worriedly. “I hope I have not made you ill.”

“It is probably nothing, I just want to be sure. I am certain it is not your potion, Severus. It has never caused me problems before.”

Breakfast continued quietly until Solarin began to pull at her earlobes.

“Does anyone else hear that?” she asked, looking around for the source of whatever she was hearing.

“No,” Bill replied. “What do you hear?”

“A ringing. There’s a ringing in my ears. None of you hear it?”

“Nope,” Charlie replied, eyeing Sirius warily as he laced his fingers with Phoenix’s.

“Miri hears it,” Ginny offered. They all peered at the little girl, who was grabbing at her ears and growling.

Harry smiled. He had begun to relax into Miri’s abilities and felt he should praise her for being able to use them. He no longer felt that it was a curse, Severus had convinced him that she was special. Solarin’s explanations of what it felt like to be an augur had helped too. Harry was now determined to make it as easy as possible for Miri to love being what she was, and that included adoration for every demonstration.

“Who’s my clever little augur then?” Harry said as he retrieved her from Ginny. “What do you hear?”

“I’m going to find it,” Solarin announced determinedly and disappeared from the room. Harry walked around with Miri, trying to ease her discomfort, murmuring soothing words to her, until they heard Solarin call for Severus.

Severus glanced up from his breakfast as his name was called. He shrugged and followed it to the entrance hall, where Solarin was standing, staring at Kingsley Shacklebolt. He was holding a limp figure and Severus felt his natural curiosities rise. He was mildly surprised that he wasn’t angry at Kingsley, but he put it to the back of his mind to examine later.

“The Minister, ordered him brought here, to you,” Kingsley explained nervously, nodding at Solarin. 

“He’s a muggle, why would Fudge order that?” she asked, taking a step forwards and turning the pale face towards herself. She stepped back, pulling her hand away as if she had been burnt. Severus peeked over her head and suddenly, he couldn’t breathe.

Lying in Kingsley’s arms, limp and lifeless, was Tobias Snape.

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Severus paced angrily as Molly mopped at his fathers sweaty brow. This couldn’t be right, it was impossible. His father had died, twelve years ago, serving time for the murder of his mother. How could he be lying in one of the guest bedrooms, sweating out a fever? It wasn’t possible.

Kingsley was hovering in the corner, watching the scene with barely concealed fear. He was obviously still afraid of Severus strangling him again, and succeeding this time. Severus felt no such urges. 

Kingsley had informed them that Tobias Snape had somehow managed to find the Leaky Cauldron, though no one was quite sure how seeing as he was a muggle and therefore not supposed to be able to see it. He had stumbled inside and collapsed, begging for Solarin and Severus to Tom, the toothless barman. Tom had contacted Fudge and the Minister had ordered Kingsley to bring Tobias to the Snape siblings, claiming that they would know what to do with the strange muggle.

Solarin was sitting quietly on the wide windowsill, watching the whole scene with interest. She seemed to be very calm, and Severus wondered how she could be unruffled. The man who had beaten her, killed her mother in front of her, who was supposed to be dead, for Merlin’s sake, was lying there, being tended to by Molly Weasley. 

Solarin, Severus, Molly and Kingsley were the only ones in the room with Tobias, the rest of the house’s inhabitants ordered to stay in the kitchen. Severus would not allow Harry near this man, not if he was who he appeared to be.

“It cannot be, Tobias Snape is dead. He is an impostor,” Severus stated angrily. “That man is not who he claims to be. It is not possible.”

“He is Tobias Snape, Severus,” Solarin argued from the window. “It is him. The only question is how. Kingsley, would you go and call Albus Dumbledore and Mad-Eye Moody for us, please?”

Kingsley nodded and sped from the room, grateful to be away from Severus, not yet realizing that Bill was sitting in the kitchen.

Severus continued to pace and Solarin let him be until Dumbledore entered the room. His eyes lacked their usual twinkle as they surveyed the scene and his face was grave as he looked at the two of them. Moody ran a few diagnostic tests on Tobias but still Dumbledore stared at the siblings. Severus recognised the guilt on his mentors face.

“Albus, what did you do?” Severus whispered. “What did you do?”

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Severus secluded himself in the library with Albus, Moody and Solarin, taking a seat as Albus instructed.

“I apologise, old friend,” Albus said sadly, looking for all the world older than he ever had before. “I have lied to you both.”

“A hidden past, a secret long kept. It was told to save a family, to ease a mind. Deception not easily forgiven. A face from the past, long pushed aside but never forgotten. Resolution, but no peace. A choice made. A truth uncovered but not understood. A passing, a loss,” Solarin reeled off quietly from her perch in the window seat, Albus staring at her in shock.

“Your premonition?” Severus asked. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“Correct me if I get this wrong, won’t you Albus?” she asked and the old wizard nodded. “‘A face from the past, long pushed aside but never forgotten’. That means Tobias. ‘A hidden past, a secret long kept’. You told us he had died when he lived. ‘It was told to save a family, to ease a mind’. That would be me and Severus, you told it to us to ease his fears of Tobias one day coming back and taking me from him. Am I right so far?”

“Yes, child, you are right,” Albus agreed. Severus stared at him in shock. Albus had lied to him, to them both. He felt his trust in the man slipping.

“‘Deception not easily forgiven’. I’m guessing that would be our forgiveness of you, of your lies. I won’t hazard a guess at the rest, I cannot be clear on those yet. But I will hazard a guess at him dying. ‘A passing, a loss’. Tobias is dying, isn’t he?”

“Yes. He has advanced liver cancer. He will not live more than a few days, a week at the most. It is amazing that he managed to stand, let alone make it here,” Moody informed. 

Moody looked angry at Dumbledore, but Severus couldn’t quite get his mind to process the information he was being given. Albus had lied to him. The man he had trusted more than anyone else with Solarin’s safety, the one he had turned to when their mother had died, the one who had allowed him to see his best friend one last time before she was slain had lied to him.

“What did you do with him? Where has he been for the last twelve years?” Solarin asked, and Severus latched onto it, latched on to his sister taking charge when he couldn’t get himself to utter a single word.

“Dublin, Ireland. Twelve years ago, I was contacted and told that Tobias was to be released from prison. All of Severus’ fears were coming to life. You had just finished your first year of Hogwarts, the two of you were thriving. I could not let him ruin it.” He sighed, glancing at Severus before continuing. “I went to see him on the day he was released. I convinced him to leave you be, to sign over everything, to go away and not return. I provided him with a new identity. For the last twelve years, he has been David Jones. He has been living in Dublin, working in a glass factory.”

“Why has he come back? Why now? Why not die in peace, why come all this way?” she asked. “Why is he here?”

“I cannot say. The first I heard of his return was Kingsley’s call. I cannot tell you, my child,” Albus replied, staring at Severus. “Can you forgive me? I did what I felt was best for the both of you. You were so unsure of yourself, Severus. I was only trying to help you, to free you finally.”

“You lied to me.” It came out as a whisper and Severus tried again. “You lied to me,” he said more confidently. “I trusted you to help me protect her. He could have come back at any moment, Albus. How was I supposed to protect her when I had no idea what I was up against?”

“He did not come back, not until today,” Albus reasoned.

“Yes, you are right. He came back today, to the house where my family resides. Harry, Miri, Solarin, Phoenix. Need I name more members of my family? I will not have him here. Take him somewhere else. I do not care where you take him, just get him out,” Severus snarled, standing and beginning to pace angrily once more. “Forgive you? Forgive you? I cannot trust you anymore, how am I expected to forgive you, you manipulative old fool!”

Dumbledore looked like he had been slapped in the face and he stared, mouth open in shock, at the Potions Master.

“He stays.”

Severus whipped round to stare at his sister. 

“You heard me. Tobias stays,” she repeated.

“Sol, you cannot be serious. Have him here? In the same house as Harry and Miri, the same house as Phoenix? Why on earth would you say that?” he questioned.

“‘Resolution, but no peace. A choice made. A truth uncovered but not understood. A passing, a loss’,” she reeled off, Severus’ face becoming more and more confused with every word. “We must let it play out, Severus. And for it to do that, he must stay. There is something you must learn, the mist told me so. You must let him stay. He is dying, he is no danger to Harry, Miri or anyone else in this house, not while he is surrounded by powerful, fully trained witches and wizards.”

“Solarin, think of what you are saying. If nothing else, you must consider that he will be a muggle mind in this house,” Severus argued, clutching at his last hope of changing her mind. He knew her, and he could see that her mind was made up with no possibility of changing it. “Miri is developing her barriers, you are still healing from a near meltdown.”

“There are enough magical minds to cancel his out. Miri and I will be fine.”

“Solarin…”

“Stop, Sevus. Stop. He stays. I will take responsibility for him while he resides here. He stays,” she said firmly and Severus sighed in defeat. 

He breathed deep, trying to get his mind to work rationally through his hurt, confusion and sense of betrayal. The most overwhelming factor was his fear. Damn it, he was not a child anymore, he was a Potions Master, he was a former Death Eater, he was a husband and father. He didn’t understand how the mere thought of the presence of that man in the house scared him beyond anything Lucius could possibly do.

“I will agree, on a few conditions,” he muttered and she inclined her head in an invitation for him to continue. “He does not utter the words freak, abnormality, abomination or any other word like them. He does not go near Miri or Harry. He stays in his room as much as humanly possible. And he does not touch a single drop of alcohol.”

“Very well,” she agreed. “But what if Harry goes near him? What if Harry gets curious? Or what if Harry goes down to the kitchen in the night and he is there? What of those scenarios, Severus?”

“I will inform Harry of my concerns,” he said stiffly and she nodded. “What of Bill?”

“I will talk to him. We should explain to the others what has happened.”

She stood and made her way to the door, Moody following her immediately but Severus and Dumbledore did not move. They stood staring at each other, Dumbledore’s face a mask of pleading, of guilt. Severus couldn’t say anything, no words would come, none that would be of any use. 

He swept from the room, catching the look of hurt his mentor sent at him as he left him standing alone.

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Bill paced the hallway outside the sickroom door, feeling murderous urges rise in him once again. Solarin and Severus had told him to stay in the kitchen, told all of them to. But he hadn’t listened. The man who had hurt his girl was in there. He wanted to rip him to shreds. He spun around and punched the wall, feeling several of the bones snap at the impact. He really should have listened to them.

He grit his teeth against the pain and shut his eyes against the tears that threatened to fall. He snapped them open again as he was assaulted by the image of Tobias Snape shaking Solarin hard enough to crack her ribs because she had conjured a ball of light. She had only wanted to play with him, have daddy join in her games. He had beaten her for it.

He stormed towards the door, only realizing at the very last moment, as his hand reached for the handle, that Solarin was trusting him to follow her instructions, that there was a reason for all of this. He swore, loudly and creatively, and threw himself towards the stairs, flying down them until he reached the kitchen. The people gathered there didn’t look any happier than he felt.

“I broke my hand,” he said simply as he threw himself into a chair. His mother came forwards and healed it for him, but he didn’t hear her scolding. His eyes were fixed on Harry, who was livid. He was pacing back and forth, Miri screaming his anger for him from his arms.

Bill brushed his mother off and made his way over to the pacing Seeker.

“How can she let him stay?” Harry snarled. “How can she do this, after what that son of a bitch has done to them?”

Bill felt vindicated. He wasn’t the only one. Though he was surprised by Harry’s colourful language. He had never heard Harry say anything worse than damn, except while he was in labour.

“She has her reasons. Give Miri to someone else while you calm down,” Bill suggested and Harry looked down, noticing for the first time how angry Miri was. He handed her to Moody, who had opted to stay for lunch and the one with the least chance of letting Miri into his mind and emotions, and resumed his pacing.

“I can’t calm down. That…that…bastard hurt Severus, he hurt Solarin. He’s supposed to be dead!” Harry ranted, and Bill found himself calming. 

“I know. But, right now, we don’t have a choice. He stays. Solarin has decided and Severus is going with it,” Bill reasoned and felt himself calm completely as he tried to soothe the younger man.

Harry stared at him as if he had grown a second head and then softened, letting out a sigh and leaning against the kitchen counter. “Do we have to like it?”

“No. In fact, I feel much better knowing that you are as pissed off about the whole situation as I am,” Bill admitted. “Word of warning, though. Don’t go punching any walls. It may seem like a good idea at the time, but it bloody hurts.”

Harry offered him a shaky smile and snapped his head up as Solarin entered the room. All eyes were on her and she seemed to be very calm as she crossed to Remus and Sirius. Bill wondered what was going on inside her head; she had closed the connection, shut him out. He didn’t feel angry about it, he just wondered what was left for her to protect him from.

“Sirius, I need a favour of you and Remus,” Solarin announced. Sirius nodded for her to continue. “I need to ask you if you will allow Tobias to stay here while he dies.”

“How long has he got?” Remus asked.

“A few days, a week at the most. He has advanced liver cancer.”

Sirius sighed and Remus grabbed his hand, soothing his volatile lover. “Why are you asking us?” Sirius asked.

“Because it is your house,” she replied. “And it is a big something to ask, requesting that he stay here while he dies.”

“Are you sure about this? Are you sure him staying here is the best course of action?” Remus questioned.

“It is the only course of action. Trust me when I tell you that this is for the best,” she said steadily.

A look passed between the Animagus and his husband and then he nodded, Solarin kissing each of them on the cheek in thanks. Her eyes landed on Bill’s bruised hand. She crossed to him and Harry, caressing the bruises.

“So it was you who made a dent in the wall, the one who swore so colourfully outside the bedroom door,” she joked. “I thought I told you to stay in here?”

“When have I ever been good at doing what I’m told?” he replied, letting her pull him into a kiss. It comforted him. She knew what she was doing, there was a reason for it. And it was only a few days. He could restrain himself for a few days.

“Why?” Harry asked her.

She sighed and looked him in the eye. “Harry, you trust me, don’t you?” she asked.

“Of course I do.”

“Then trust me when I say that this is something Severus needs. He needs this. I cannot tell you why but he does. Will you believe me if I tell you that I am doing this for Severus’ best interests?”

Harry chewed on his lower lip, considering it. He knew that Solarin would never do anything to hurt his husband, or their family. She was a good woman, a good witch. Damn scary sometimes, but definitely good. He trusted her, almost as much as he trusted Severus.

“All right. But I don’t like it, just stating that for the record,” Harry agreed and she kissed his cheek.

“You all need to know the rules of dealing with Tobias,” she announced to the room, and they settled themselves to listen to her. She leaned against the sink and took a deep breath. “Number one, no alcohol. There is to be no alcohol consumed in this house while he is here, by anyone. Do not underestimate him, he will do what he must to get to it, and you will not like him when he has had a drink.” A dark cloud passed over her face momentarily, but it was gone before anyone could get a good look at it.

“Number two, no one goes near him without me or Severus present. We know him, you do not. It is for his safety as well as your own.” She looked pointedly at Bill and he sighed, nodding. 

“Number three, no one under twenty one goes near him, and I mean no one. Severus is the one who has insisted on this rule and I will back him on it.” At this one she stared at Harry and he nodded.

“Final rule, whatever he spouts, whatever bile comes out of his mouth, you must not rise to the bait. He will try to goad you, try to lure you into getting angry for his own amusement. Do not give him the satisfaction. Does everyone understand the rules?”

They all nodded and she gave them one short sharp nod before she left the room, sweeping up the stairs.

Bill watched her go and wondered once more why she would put herself through this.

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Severus watched as Tobias cracked his eyes open, glancing up at Molly Weasley, who was still sponging at his fever ridden brow. Severus noticed that the whites of his eyes were yellow.

“Hello, darlin’. What’s your name then?” Tobias asked Molly flirtatiously, his voice rough. It didn’t surprise Severus, his voice had always been that way, even when Severus was very small.

“Molly, leave us please,” Severus ordered and she left the room, shutting the door behind her. He stared at the invalid form of his father and suppressed a shudder. How could he still scare him after so many years?

“Severus?” Tobias questioned and Severus shot him a look of disgust. It was, apparently, all the confirmation Tobias needed. “Look at you, all grown up. Come and give your old man a proper greeting.” He held open his arms and Severus sneered at him

“I will not. I would not waste the energy to cross the room,” Severus spat and Tobias hacked out a laugh.

“Still so afraid of me?”

“I am not afraid. I am merely wishing you dead.”

His fathers eyes darkened. “You’ll get your wish soon enough.”

“Yes. A few days, Mad-Eye says, a week at the most. It is too long, in my opinion. You should be rotting in the ground.”

“So why the fuck are you letting me stay, boy! Why not throw your dying father out onto the street and be done with!” Tobias snarled.

“It was not my opinion to let you stay. You owe your bed and board to Solarin, not me,” Severus said as calmly as he possibly could, but it still came out as a half shout.

“And where is the little freak? Hiding in her room? Under the bed? In a closet? Or did someone finish what I started and rid the world of her filth?”

Severus was halfway across the room, ready to end it there and then, before he realized that the very girl they were discussing was standing in the doorway. She entered, her long dark hair hanging loose and hiding her face from view. The headboard of the bed was against the same wall as the door, so all Tobias could make out was that there was a woman in the room with them. Severus crossed to his original place, leaning against the wall, as she glanced between the two men. 

“Temper,” she scolded gently.

Severus marvelled at how calm she was. How the hell was she doing it? She should be livid, like him. Then again, Solarin had always managed to surprise him in times of stress. He should really have learnt by now that he should never assume anything about her, he would be wrong every time.

Tobias let his lecherous eyes rake over her generous curves, her tight jeans, her painted on red top. Severus’ blood began to boil as Tobias licked his lips.

“Stop it, she is not for you to peruse!” Severus snarled at him and Tobias shot him a grin full of stained teeth.

“Your wife? I see your wedding ring, is she your wife?” Tobias asked and Severus laughed.

“No, she is not my wife. Don’t you recognise her?” Severus taunted. “You should.”

Severus turned her to face him head on and tenderly swept her hair away from her face, feeling satisfaction rise as Tobias paled.

“Hello, Tobias,” Solarin said calmly, pulling out her wand and tapping her hair with it, the glossy waterfall plaiting itself. “It has been a long time.” She leaned back against Severus and he placed his hands on her shoulders. She wasn’t even trembling in nerves. How was she doing it?

“You’re Solarin?” Tobias asked, his voice even hoarser in his shock. He looked her up and down, taking her in, his mouth hanging open.

“In the flesh. I know you noticed my flesh, I just thought I’d remind you seeing as you like it so much,” she said and he gulped. She had never spoken to him like that, and Severus knew why she had said she would take responsibility for him. She would keep a level head, her quick tongue her saving grace. Severus had raised her to speak her mind, to stand up for herself. It was the only lesson she had ever accepted from him without question, complaint or remark.

“I didn’t know it was you,” Tobias reasoned.

“No, of course not.” She held out her hand and conjured a ball of flames. “But if you look at any of the females in this house that way again, I will see to it that your last few days are a rather painful experience.”

His eyes turned dark, murderous, the way they had done before his fists had lashed out at them as children. “Are you threatening me?” he hissed.

“No. Simply a warning. Keep in mind, there are many fully grown, fully trained witches and wizards in this house. None of them will hesitate to cause you pain.”

Tobias appeared to be fighting the urge to spout something vile. Surprisingly, he managed to bite his tongue and nod at her, and she closed her fist, extinguishing the flames.

“Can you get out of bed?” she asked and he shook his head. “Are you in pain?”

“Yes.”

“I will see to it that you are given something for it,” she said calmly and he shook his head at her.

“I don’t want any of that nonsense you people use. No freakish medicine,” he spat. Before Severus had even seen any movement, Solarin was across the room and pushing Tobias into the mattress by his throat.

“You will not use words like that while in this house. You will keep a civil tongue in your head or I will remove it. Do you understand?” she said calmly and he nodded. She let go and took a step back so she was just out of his reach. “Would you like to know the rules of the house now or later?”

“Now,” Tobias ground out, obviously trying to figure out how to approach this new, unexpected situation.

“Very well. You don’t drink any alcohol, not a single drop. You keep a civil tongue in your head. You do not, under any circumstances, touch anyone in this house. You keep your eyes to yourself. You may ask any questions you want but there is no guarantee that any of us will answer them. Do you understand?” she enlightened and he nodded.

She took a deep breath and seated herself on one of the chairs situated to the side of the bed. Severus preferred to stay standing.

“Why did you come here?” she asked.

Tobias eyed her, trying to figure her out. She was not as he remembered her. He had expected her to be half mad or half dead by now. He had never expected her to be like this. She was calm, confident, unafraid. It was not a Solarin he was familiar with and it made him uneasy. When she had been young, she had been oh so easy to control. She had been terrified of him, and he had liked it. Her fear had meant that she did not use her magic around him, and he had enjoyed it that way. But this woman sitting before him held very little resemblance to the child he had terrorized. He wasn’t quite sure what she was capable of now.

“To see you both,” he replied eventually, choosing his words carefully.

“Why?”

“Because you’re my kids,” Tobias said simply and she laughed.

“Your kids? No, we stopped being that a long time ago. We haven’t been yours for nineteen years. Come to think of it, I don’t believe we were ever really yours. Why come to us?”

“Because I needed to clear up my mess before I died. I needed to see you both one last time.”

“He is lying!” Severus snarled. 

Solarin tilted in her chair to look at her brother. “How do you know?” she asked curiously.

“His mouth is moving,” Severus replied and she sniggered.

“Good point. He never was any good at the truth. Maybe we should let him at the booze, might loosen his tongue a bit,” she joked and Severus growled at how hopeful Tobias looked at the prospect of being allowed alcohol. “Then again, I have no desires to be covered in bruises anytime soon, so I think not.” His face dropped.

She turned to him once more. “Are you going to tell us the truth?” she asked. “Or do I have to force one of our nasty potions down your throat?”

Tobias considered his options. She didn’t seem to be the type to back down from him, not anymore. How the hell had she changed so much? How could he not scare her anymore, when he terrified Severus? Who had changed her? He had two options. Option one, he could do as she asked, and answer honestly. Or option two, they would force a potion down him. He was in no fit state to stop them.

“I’ll answer your questions if you answer mine,” he bargained and Solarin nodded.

“Why are you here?” she asked.

“I didn’t want to die alone.”

“So, why come to us? You must have known we wouldn’t want you here, so why come?”

“Because you are all I have, whether you like it or not.”

Something flashed in her eyes but it was gone before he had a chance to look at it properly. 

“How did you get here from Dublin if you can no longer stand?” she asked, lighting a cigarette.

“Put that out,” he snarled, motioning at it.

“No. Shan’t. Answer the question. How did you get here?” she said simply, blowing her smoke at him.

“Some wizard found me, he brought me here,” he spat, coughing.

“What wizard?” Severus asked.

“No, you answer one of mine now,” he bargained and Solarin glanced at Severus before nodding. “Who are you married to, Severus?”

“Harry. I am married to Harry,” Severus replied after a pause.

“I want to meet her. I want to meet the whore you married, boy.”

Solarin had to use a shield charm to keep Severus back, he was that angry. 

“Harry is not a whore!” Severus yelled. He didn’t even notice when the door opened and Sirius stepped in, carrying a tray. “Don’t you dare! You have no right to come in here and judge us, to pass any kind of comment, you twisted, disgusting bastard!”

“Severus! Enough!” Solarin yelled over him, shocking him into looking at her. “Don’t give him the satisfaction. He is trying to goad you. Let it slide.”

“I want him dead!”

“He will be soon enough! Just do it my way for the time being. Please?”

Severus breathed through his nose as he tried to get himself to calm down. She was right, he knew that. But hearing someone call his beloved Harry a whore, it set him off. Harry had called himself that in the beginning, all because of Lucius Malfoy. And here was another son of a bitch trying to damage his lover. It didn’t matter that Harry was not in the room, it was the principle of it.

Solarin took the tray from Sirius and set it on Tobias’ lap roughly, glaring at him. “I told you to keep a civil tongue in your head,” she snarled. “You will control yourself or the first thing to go will be your food.”

“You wouldn’t starve a dying man,” Tobias laughed, the chuckle dying in his throat at her reply.

“Try me.”

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Two days passed in much the same manner, Tobias dangling just enough information to keep them interested while keeping the main knowledge a secret. Tobias didn’t eat after the first meal, and Solarin refused to relent. Every few hours he would say something to piss Severus off and Solarin would be forced to restrain him again. She punished Tobias for these little bouts of acid tongue by taking things away. First it was his food, then his pain medication, finally his bathroom privileges, various other things being denied in-between. Tobias seemed to be cracking, but all Severus could see was that the man was still breathing. Lucius had been replaced at the top of his hate list by his father, but only just.

On the morning of the third day, Solarin gave Tobias a large breakfast and allowed him a trip to the bathroom. She ordered him to shower and shave, with promises of physical pain if he did not comply. An hour later, she levitated him to the living room and put him in a chair, leaving him there alone with a muggle paperback. She walked into the kitchen and sat down calmly at the table.

“We’re going to try something new,” she announced.

“New?” Severus asked.

“Yes. He keeps dangling information out to us without revealing anything of use. So we are going to approach this from a new angle.”

“What do you suggest?” Molly asked. 

“We’re all going to sit in the living room with him,” she explained.

“Have you lost your mind? I will not have my husband and my daughter in the same room as that man!” Severus exploded. “What the hell are you thinking?”

“Severus, listen to me.” She waited patiently for him to calm down enough to actually process her words before she spoke again. “He is playing with us. He will not tell us what we want to know unless we give him something. He wants to know about our family. So we will give it to him.”

“And if you are wrong? If he does not cooperate?” Severus asked. He didn’t like the idea, but he knew her plan had merit. He had to admit, she could be damn manipulative sometimes. No wonder she had been a Slytherin. He stared at his husband, pacing with Miri. He couldn’t believe he was actually considering agreeing to her plan.

“Then I will force it out of him,” she said simply. She did not need to elaborate. If Tobias wouldn’t reveal anything to them, they would not require truth serums. Solarin would go into his head and rip out what she wanted, no mater how unhinged it left him. The Minister had given her full permission to do what she wanted with the muggle, the Minister anxious to know how he had found the Leaky Cauldron.

“I will not agree to anything for Harry. He will be the one to be subjected to that man. Ask him,” Severus said.

“Of course not. I will not have anyone in that room who has not consented,” she stated. “I require full cooperation from everyone for this to work.” She turned to the rest of their family, gathered around the table, all except Harry, Hermione and Ron, who were pacing with a child each. “If anyone has any reservations, voice them. I will not force anyone to do this.”

The room was silent, save for baby babbles, as they all considered it. They all knew that Solarin had something up her sleeve, that there was a plan to her apparent madness. They also knew what Tobias Snape had done to his children as Severus and Solarin had sat them all down on the first night and explained everything. They had skimmed over details, but they all knew what the siblings had been getting at.

The man was cruel, cold, sadistic. 

Evil.

They had to weigh the options: it was either say no and Solarin would rip it out of the mans head, in all likelihood driving him insane in the process, or agree and trust that she knew what she was doing. When considered like that, they had no problems agreeing, even Harry.

They made their way to the living room door, where she instructed them to go in and pretend that he wasn’t even there. She told them all to sit and talk, to behave as they normally would. They all complied and Solarin felt a swell of satisfaction at Tobias’ raised eyebrows and wide eyes.

The most smile inducing moment was when Severus stubbornly pulled Harry and Miri onto his lap, holding them close. Tobias seemed to be stunned speechless as he realised that Harry was not short for Harriet. Severus felt extremely fulfilled by the look of utter disbelief on his fathers face and he kissed Harry, just because.

“Good morning, Tobias,” Solarin said after three hours of them all sitting there. The conversation had been stilted at first, but it was soon flowing. “We are going to play a little game. For every piece of useful information you give me, I will answer one question you have about any person in this room. Everyone in here is family to me and Severus. You wanted to know about them, so here it is, your chance to know anything you want.”

Severus had to suppress his grin. Clever little witch. Tobias was going for the bait, he could see it. All she had to do would be to tip him over the edge.

“You can ask anything, and I will tell you, I swear it,” she offered and it was all that was needed for Tobias to snap. He nodded and she smiled kindly at him. Severus sniggered quietly into Harry’s shoulder. Kill him with kindness.

“Good. Now, do you understand the rules of the game or would you like me to clear them up for you?” she said sweetly, and Severus saw Bill go red with his own suppressed laughter, burying his face in Solarin’s back to hide the tears of mirth. Everyone else seemed stunned by the new development, but they took it in their stride, all watching interestedly.

“I answer a question of yours honestly, giving you something useful, and you will tell me anything I want to know about any of them in return,” Tobias stated, clearly unsure of where it was all leading. Severus himself was unsure of what she was planning, but he would go with it.

“Exactly. Do you want to play?”

“Yes.”

“Very well. I shall go first. Who took you to the Leaky Cauldron?” she asked.

“He was a wizard.”

“Yes, we have covered that already, that is nothing new to me. What was his name?” she reasoned.

“He never told me.”

She sighed and licked her lips in seeming frustration, but Severus knew it was all an act. A clever ruse to lull Tobias into a false sense of security. “Very well. Your turn to ask as you were honest with me.”

Tobias’ yellow and black eyes scanned the room, trying to pick the least conspicuous looking one, the one she would most likely describe without hesitation. Harry was not an option, not yet. He would have to work up to that one. But the little blonde looked likely.

He pointed at Phoenix. “I want to know who she is,” he demanded and Solarin nodded, Phoenix’s eyes wide at being chosen first. Solarin winked at the little witch.

“Her name is Phoenix Rose Lupin-Black, she is sixteen, and is Harry’s sister. Now, what did this wizard look like?”

“He was blonde, appeared rich.” He pointed at Ginny. “That one.”

“That is Ginny Weasley, she is fifteen, and is Harry’s best friends sister. Why did he bring you to London?”

“He said it was important, said Severus needed to be punished for taking his pet.” The room went silent and still. 

“So, Lucius has found a new game,” she muttered, frowning in concentration, before her face cleared and she smiled at Tobias. The muggle was staring at her, fear across his face in case he had said something wrong. “Which one now?”

He pointed to Sirius. “That is Sirius Orion Lupin-Black. This is his house and he is married to the man sitting next to him. His name is Remus John Lupin-Black and he is a werewolf. The two of them are Phoenix and Harry’s adoptive parents. What did Albus Dumbledore say to you to convince you to stay away?”

Two for the price of one. Severus could see Tobias beginning to relax into the game and he kissed Harry’s neck, making Harry giggle in surprise. He understood now. Harry was the bait. She was working up to Harry, leading him to him, the one he really wanted knowledge of. Tobias grasped that to get the information about Harry, he would have to wait for the right moment, the right question. Severus saw Tobias’ eyes fix on his husband at the giggle and he turned Harry’s head to kiss him, sweet and fleeting. Harry smiled at him, Miri cooing. Severus stroked his long fingers over her curls and Tobias returned his stare to Solarin, a little flustered. Miri really did look very much like Solarin.

“He told me that if I interfered, if I tried to upset you and Severus, then he would kill me, and he would make it very painful,” Tobias revealed. “He said that the two of you were special, that you needed to be taken care of, to be away from me. He said that the two of you were finally free and he would not sit by idle while I destroyed you once more.”

Solarin looked at Severus and he inclined his head. He understood now, Albus had really been doing what he thought was best. It didn’t mean that Severus would forgive him for his deception, or that trust wouldn’t be a long time coming, but there was the seed of both in him now.

“Very good. Pick one,” she praised.

“The one sharing the chair with you.”

She craned her head to look at Bill, who was patiently waiting to see how she would define their relationship. She reached up and tangled her fingers in his hair before she faced Tobias once more. “This is William Weasley, more commonly called Bill, the second eldest of the seven Weasley children. He is a curse breaker, he works for Gringotts, the Wizarding Bank. He is my lover.”

Severus choked on his sip of iced tea at her phrasing. He peeked at Tobias to see him covering his rage at her word. 

Bill was biting the inside of his cheek to stop himself laughing, and all the other inhabitants of the room seemed to be doing similar things to keep the hilarity from spilling forth. Well, most of them.

Hermione was the first to laugh, then Ron and Ginny, Phoenix joining soon after, and finally Harry, Miri laughing along with him. Solarin grinned covertly at them and then resumed a straight face as she faced Tobias once more.

“I only have one more question, and if you answer me honestly, I will tell you everything about Harry,” she bargained and his eyes brightened greedily. Severus instinctively tightened his hold on his husband, laying a protective hand on Miri’s back.

“All right.”

“Why did you do it?”

“Do what?”

“All of it. You hurt me, hurt Severus. You hurt mum. You killed her. Why did you do it?” she said, her voice calm and emotionless, carefully controlled.

The room fell silent. Tobias finally realized that this was what she had been aiming for the whole time. He stared at her, his mouth open in shock. He glanced at Harry. Was the knowledge of the little brunet on his sons lap enough for him to reveal all?

“Why that?” he asked.

“Because I watched her die and I want to know why. I want to know what we did to make you hate us so much. What did we do to deserve that?”

Tobias coughed and Solarin helped him gulp down some water, gently tilting the glass and then wiping his mouth. She was confusing him, Severus could see it in his tired eyes. He didn’t understand. She was asking him about the less than stellar years of his life, demanding to know, and yet she wasn’t upset about it. If anything, she sounded mildly curious. And she was still kindly helping him when his shaky hands failed.

But Severus understood. If the man was confused he would be more likely to let something slip. If it was all added together, it all became clear what she was doing. Moody would be so proud when informed.

She had denied him, punished him. Then she had nourished him. Then she had rewarded. And now she was dangling bait, offering knowledge he desperately wanted. All he had to do was tell her.

“I hated you,” Tobias whispered. 

“Why?”

“Because I couldn’t do it. You were a tiny little dot of a thing and you could do all these things I couldn’t. I was jealous.”

“Is that all? Jealousy?”

“No. Your mother…she…well…she loved you…she adored you…both of you…”

“She loved us more than she loved you,” Severus supplied quietly and he nodded.

“And it was unnatural. Children doing weird shit, it was deformed!” Tobias seemed to be falling into her trap, and Severus noticed how stiffly she was sitting as his temper rose. It was the same things he had spouted when they were children. “All of it was! The two of you were, are! You’re freaks! How could I not hate you? You were abominations, and I should have drowned you at birth! I would have been rid of you! You and your abnormalities!” He gasped in oxygen. It was as if he couldn’t stop himself, it just kept spilling out. Bile, venom, disgusting accusations. It just went on. 

Bill looked ready to rip Tobias to shreds but stayed seated. Sirius pulled Remus closer to him, Arthur dragged in Molly, Charlie hugged Phoenix and Ron grabbed Hermione. Harry snuggled against Severus’ chest, shaking in anger and rising panic. Miri was passed to Remus, Harry was too close to his emotions just then for her to handle. 

Severus sat quietly, finding himself unsurprised at the words. He had heard them throughout the entirety of his first seventeen years on earth. He had thought he would be angry at the outburst, when it arrived, but he was calm. It washed over him and he finally saw how pathetic the man was. 

Finally, the tirade ended.

“Done?” Solarin asked and Tobias nodded, watching her warily, her calm tone making him nervous. “You didn’t answer me.”

“What?” Tobias asked.

“I asked you why you killed mum. You did not answer me. If you want the information about Harry, you will tell me why I grew up without a mother.”

Tobias stared at her as if she had suddenly turned into a pumpkin or something equally as unbelievable. “You will still tell me?”

“Yes, if you tell me why you killed her,” she replied quietly. Bill’s mouth had dropped open in shock.

Tobias took a deep breath. “I want to go back to my room. I don’t want to play anymore,” he announced and she shook her head.

“You will tell me. If you do not, I will go into your head and rip it out. It is your choice,” she warned.

His mouth moved soundlessly, his eyes wide with shock. All eyes were fixed upon her and she stared at Tobias. She lounged back against Bill, as if they were discussing nothing more than the weather.

“I was drunk. I was convinced she was having an affair. I was sure she was trying to leave me. I didn’t mean to kill her, but it happened. I won’t apologise for something I have served my time for,” he reeled off suddenly.

“Are you saying it was an accident?”

“It was one of our fights that got out of hand.”

Solarin took a deep breath and nodded. She beckoned Harry over to her and sat him on the arm of her chair, holding his hand to keep him calm. Bill placed a hand on his back to lend support. He kept glancing at Severus, who was nodding encouragingly, and staring at Tobias.

“Harry, tell him who you are,” she instructed gently.

“Which bit of me? There is a lot to who I am,” he said shakily, staring warily at the sick man.

“Your name and age to begin with.”

“My name is Harry James Potter-Snape and I am sixteen. I will be seventeen in a week.”

“Sixteen?” Tobias questioned and Harry nodded.

“Harry, how are you a Snape?” she asked.

“I’m married to Severus.”

“Harry, why are you with Severus?”

Harry smiled in spite of his fear and looked at Severus, who smiled back. “Because I love him,” he said simply, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “Because he is a good man, a good husband, a good father. He loves me, more than anything in the whole world. He loves me for me. I could go on but then we would be here forever. There are too many reasons to list them all.”

Solarin smiled at him.

“You’re a faggot, Severus? A nancy boy? Tell me, does he take it up the arse or do you?” Tobias spat at his son and Solarin laughed. “What the fuck are you laughing about?”

“Harry, tell him how you are special,” she instructed and Severus grinned at her. Harry wasn’t just the bait, he was the weapon.

Harry blushed but a reassuring nod from Severus had his courage returning. 

“I’m the youngest Seeker in a century. I killed acromantula’s and a basilisk when I was twelve, and I beat a dragon when I was fourteen. I saved the world when I was fifteen, with help from my friends. I saved your arse,” Harry said cheekily to Tobias, his confidence returning. “Oh, and I’m a magical hermaphrodite.”

It was almost an afterthought, and they all chuckled at him. Tobias opened his mouth to speak but Harry got in there first.

“In case you’re confused, a Seeker is a sportsman, I guess that’s the best way to explain it to you. A basilisk is a giant snake, an acromantula is a giant spider. And a magical hermaphrodite is a being that is defined as neither male nor female because I am both. I’m a gender all on my own. I am both male and female, because I have a full set of both. I have boy bits and girl bits. I prefer to be referred to as a male, though.”

He paused, moving to Remus and retrieving Miri before settling himself on the arm of her chair once more. He was silent, and Solarin opened her mouth to prompt him again, when he spoke.

“Oh! I almost forgot! I’m the first magical hermaphrodite to have a girl as my first child, but she’s special all on her own so we don’t really count that one properly.” Harry reeled off, offhandedly.

“Harry, why is Miri special?” Solarin asked innocently, smiling in a satisfied sort of way at Tobias. Miri was squealing in delight at Harry’s amusement of the dumbstruck expression on Tobias’ face.

“My daughter is like you. She’s an augur, just like you. She can do what you do.”

Tobias looked like he was about to have a heart attack as the words sunk in and he stared at the little girl. No one was sure how he managed to do it, but he stood suddenly and made a lunge for Miri, Solarin moving in front of Harry to shield them both from the muggle. Harry and Miri were pushed back to Severus’ arms by Bill, and Severus secured them in Remus’ arms before turning to look at his sister and his father facing off.

“Get them out of here, now,” she ordered and Bill herded them all out of the room, Sirius and Remus guiding them to the kitchen.

“You son of a bitch. How dare you? You pathetic bastard,” Solarin snarled. Bill returned and Severus told him to call Mad-Eye and Dumbledore. “You did enough damage to me, I won’t let you touch that little miracle.”

Severus saw it coming but he couldn’t stop it. 

Tobias punched Solarin in the face, putting his whole weight behind the blow. She went flying, rolling as she hit the floor. And then Tobias was lying on the floor, his eyes wide and lifeless, empty.

Solarin had ended the game.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Harry left Miri with Sirius and took Severus by the hand, leading him to the bathroom. He ran a hot steamy bath and stripped the two of them, pushing Severus towards the tub. He eased himself in after him and leant back against his chest, slightly tilted so he could see his husbands face.

“Are you all right?” Harry asked as Severus wrapped his arms around him.

Severus didn’t answer him and Harry didn’t push it. Instead, he reached for the soap and turned so he was facing him, kneeling between the long legs. He ran the bar over the pale flesh, bathing his lover. When he was done, when there was not an inch of skin he had left untouched, he reached for the shampoo, straddling Severus’ thighs to get better access to the long hair. Severus’ hands gripped his hips as he massaged his scalp, Severus’ eyes closed and his lips parted to let out breathless moans of enjoyment. Harry grinned and dumped a jug of water over Severus’ head, making him splutter in shock.

Severus spat out the water that had slipped into his mouth and blinked to get it out of his eyes. He managed to get in a quick breath before Harry poured another jug of water over his head. He opened his eyes to find Harry grinning at him, trying not to laugh.

Severus didn’t say anything, he couldn’t. How could he possibly say it? How could he say he was grieving the loss of a man he hated? It didn’t make sense to him, so instead of trying to explain it, he splashed his lover, smirking. He grabbed the jug and doused Harry, smiling at the spluttering laughs.

Severus grabbed the soap and bathed his husband, taking his time, making sure he didn’t miss any of that pale skin. He shampooed his messy hair, which had finally received the long overdue trim from Molly, and carefully rinsed the suds from it.

When he was sure Harry was as clean as he was going to get, he pulled him in for a kiss, Harry wrapping his slick wet arms around his neck. He lost himself, let himself get pulled in by the gentle nipping of Harry’s teeth on his lower lip, by the tentative exploration of his tongue, of his slim warm weight in his arms. 

It was all suddenly too much, the events of the past few days hitting him all at once. He pulled away and buried his head in Harry’s neck, crushing him to his chest, sobbing for all he was worth. Harry stroked his hair, his neck, his back. Those slim fingers trailed across his shoulders, and Severus felt the touch sweep away all the pain, all the hurt.

“It’s over,” Severus whispered. “It’s finally over.”

Harry kissed his neck and Severus pulled back to look into those bright green eyes.

“I’m not like him,” Severus admitted. “That’s what I needed to learn, I needed to see it. I had to know that I wasn’t like him. Harry…oh God…Harry, I swear I will never hurt you. I will never hurt Miri. Never. I would rather be struck down right now than ever do that.”

Harry smiled softly at him. “I told you,” Harry whispered, cupping his face. “I told you that you were not like him. You are nothing like him. And I know you would never ever hurt me or Miri. You, Severus Potter-Snape, are the best man in my life and I love you more than anything else in the whole world. And I know that you feel the same about me.”

“I do, I love you, Harry, more than anything. You told him so. I am so proud of you for the way you handled him,” Severus whispered, running his thumb over the full lower lip.

“I wanted him to know. I wanted to tell him what a wonderful man you are, and how happy you make me. He had to be told what a good husband you are, and he definitely had to know what good a father you are,” Harry stated simply.

“I couldn’t stop him hitting Solarin,” Severus admitted, his gaze dropping to the bite shaped scars on Harry’s shoulder.

“It was too fast. And she’s all right. You healed her, it’s just bruising now, and that fades.”

“A broken jaw, a broken cheekbone and a broken nose, all from one punch. Sweet Merlin, how the hell didn’t he end up killing her when she was small?” Severus asked angrily.

“Because she is tougher than she looks,” Harry stated, forcing Severus to look at him. “So are you.”

Severus snorted. “You are biased.”

Harry tilted his head to the side and pouted in consideration. “Yeah, I am. And I like it.”

Severus chuckled, bringing him in for another kiss, sweet and slow. Severus felt all his feelings of his father fade, felt Harry’s lips and hands, his beautiful body and tender heart drive them all away. He didn’t care anymore. It mattered nothing to him what his father had done, not now he had Harry. When Harry touched him, kissed him, even looked at him, his past disappeared. When Harry kissed him, nothing else mattered.

“Severus?”

“Yes?”

“I wanted to ask about when you claim me again, when I’m not sore anymore,” Harry began.

“What about it, love?” Severus asked, running his thumb over a scar on Harry’s collarbone. He felt it was a shame he could do nothing about the scars Lucius had inflicted. Harry shouldn’t have to live with them. But they were different to his curse scar, they had been made by hand, not magic. There was no magical way to remove the scars on Harry’s pale body. Severus had asked Harry if he wanted to try a muggle surgery to remove them, but Harry had refused. Harry had claimed that the scars reminded him of how lucky he was now and Severus had let the subject drop. It was Harry’s body, Harry’s choice.

“Well, I don’t want anymore children yet. I want them eventually, but not yet. I want to be with you, though. I’m not quite sure how to do one without getting the other,” Harry said with a shy grin and Severus smiled.

“There are several methods you can use to prevent an unplanned pregnancy,” Severus reassured, choosing his words carefully.

“Like what?” Harry asked, using the sponge to trickle water down Severus’ chest.

“Well, there is a charm you can use, there are potions you can take, or there are muggle methods of contraception, such as condoms and the contraceptive Pill. Though, I am unsure how well the Pill would work with your anatomy. The reliability of condoms is a factor also. They can break.”

Harry tilted his head, considering the options. “I don’t think muggle methods are right for us. How do we use the charm?” Harry asked, running a comb through Severus’ wet hair.

“We cast it before we enjoy each other. You will glow blue briefly. It will protect you for twelve hours,” Severus explained, tilting his head so that Harry could get a better angle on his long dark strands.

“But we could forget it.” 

Severus tried to suppress his shudder and failed. “Solarin and Bill use it. They have not forgotten.” He paused. “Yet.”

“I really don’t ever want to know anything like that again. That is way too much information about your sister, even if it is reassuring,” Harry said, pulling a face.

“Agreed. I just felt it would be appropriate for you to be aware. I will never bring that up again,” Severus concurred, sighing gratefully. “Sometimes I wish she and Bill did not tell me these things. It is reassuring to know I am not about to become an uncle anytime soon, though.”

“What about the potions?” Harry asked, changing the subject. He chucked the comb over his shoulder and started twirling the hair in his fingers.

Severus chuckled at Harry playing with his hair. He knew Harry would grow his long enough to fiddle with if it didn’t annoy him so much. As a result, Severus had come to enjoy the slim fingers toying with his.

“There are two contraceptive potions that I can brew for you. The first is one that you take daily, usually with breakfast though the timing is a personal choice. It protects for the full 24 hours. Though, if a dose is forgotten, you are unprotected. The second is one that you take biannually. You consume one dose every six months and you will be defended against unplanned pregnancy for the full six months,” Severus described, Harry smiling at the explanation.

“I like the sound of the six months one. Can I use that one, will it work for me?”

“It will work. I asked Poppy Pomfrey of suitable contraceptives for you to use, for when the time came for you to ask me of them. She assures me that the potion will be effective. I will begin preparing it for you tomorrow. It will take a week to brew,” Severus clarified. Harry was used to Severus having gone to Pomfrey or Dumbledore, asking the relevant information before Harry asked. Harry loved him for it.

Harry smiled and kissed him, gently taking his hand and guiding it down between them, pushing Severus’ hand between his thighs. “Check,” Harry instructed and Severus nibbled his neck as he slipped a gentle finger into him. Harry sighed at it, nodding, and then hissed in pain as Severus tried to add a second one, pulling away from the tender hand instinctively.

“Damn it!” Harry growled as the fingers were removed. “How long is this going to take? I want you to claim me. It’s not fair.”

Severus smiled softly and kissed him, running his fingers along his spine. “Not much longer, love. Just have a little more patience. I promise, when you are back to your old self, I will make it worth your while,” Severus whispered in his ear, sucking the lobe into his mouth and toying with it with his tongue.

Harry moaned, running his hands up the trimly muscled arms and grabbing the broad shoulders, pulling himself closer. His blood rushed to his groin and he felt himself harden. He cried out in surprise as his penis rubbed against Severus’. He thrust experimentally and moaned at the pleasure that shot up his spine.

“This is new,” Harry breathed and Severus chuckled.

“Would you like to see if I can get us there like this?” Severus asked, licking his Adam’s apple. “I bet I can get us there using only my hands. I bet I won’t move my hips at all.”

“I bet you won’t be able to do it. You can’t keep still, you never can. What are we betting for?” Harry asked as Severus reclined against the side of the tub, smirking, his hands holding Harry’s slim hips.

“Hmmmm. How about washing up duty the next time Molly asks one of us to do it? If I move my hips, I do it. If I do not, you do it,” Severus said with a grin.

“Deal.”

Severus pulled Harry’s hips a little closer, aligning their members properly. He wrapped his hand around both of them and began to stroke, slowly. Harry gasped and latched his lips to his husbands, moaning into his mouth, gripping the sides of the tub. Severus kept to his slow pace, building their pleasure gradually, letting Harry savour it. His plan was going well, and he was feeling very confident of his ability to keep still. That was, until Harry trailed his hands down, his fingertips grazing over his nipples. He clenched his thighs and Harry smiled mischievously at him.

“You’re going to lose,” Harry taunted, circling the rosy nubs with his fingers before smirking and ducking his head to lick one.

Severus knew right then and there that he had made a very bad move. Damn it, he had been outsmarted by a Gryffindor. How had that happened?

“Harry,” Severus moaned as Harry worried his nipple between his teeth. He took a deep breath, trying to regain control. That plan was shattered when Harry slipped a hand down to join his around their members. He hissed as Harry’s fingertips tickled along his length, his knees trembling.

“I know you want to move,” Harry taunted. “Give up now.”

“I will not. I am Severus Snape, I do not give up,” he ground out between clenched teeth. He let out a strangled moan as Harry somehow managed to work his free hand down between them to play with his balls. “That is an unfair advantage.”

“So do something about it,” Harry replied cheekily, licking his nipple again. Severus bucked his hips, sending a wave of water across the tiled floor. Harry smiled in triumph at him and Severus groaned. “You lost. You have to do the dishes.”

Severus stilled their hands and forced Harry to look at him. “How are you not losing control?” he asked suspiciously and Harry smirked. Severus looked down to find that he was not stroking both of them. He was only stroking himself. Harry had used a spell on him, his wand was lying innocently on the side of the tub. “That is cheating. I demand a rematch.”

“Nope. You said nothing about using magic to win,” Harry chuckled. “I won.”

“Why that blasted hat didn’t go against you and put you in Slytherin anyway is beyond me,” Severus grumbled.

Harry shrugged and laughed. “You didn’t even notice I had moved back. That spell is wicked.”

“Who taught you that spell?”

“Fred and George. They said the spell was for when I got up in the middle of the night, so you could sleep. I adapted its usage.”

“I am going to kill them both and you are misusing your magic. That was sneaky. I will punish you and execute them later. First, you come closer so I can finish what I started,” Severus said, curling his hands around Harry’s hips and trying to pull him closer but Harry resisted.

“Not until you admit that you just got out Slytherined by a Gryffindor,” Harry bargained. “And admit that you lost.”

“I did not get out Slytherined. That is not even a word anyway,” Severus insisted stubbornly.

“Fine, but at least admit that you lost,” Harry insisted.

Severus huffed in annoyance, but Harry was smiling at him, his beautiful wet body practically glowing in the candlelight. Those green eyes were shining so brightly, Severus just couldn’t stay mad at him. Where had his control around Harry gone? Had he ever really had any? He seemed to asking himself that quite a lot. 

“All right, you won. I have to do the dishes. And yes, I got out Slytherined by a Gryffindor. Just do not tell anyone and I will let you have this one,” he admitted, Harry nodding before he slid closer. 

Severus grabbed Harry’s wand and chucked it across the room. “No more tricks from you and no wandless or nonverbal magic,” he warned and Harry blushed. “Now, shall we enjoy each other or would you like to trick me some more?”

Harry leaned in and kissed him, deep and heated, his tongue toying with Severus’. Severus wrapped his arms around him, sliding his hands along the smooth skin, laying one on the base of his spine and pulling his hips forwards. He was rewarded with Harry throwing his head back and moaning in pleasure. He kept his hand on his back as he moved his other one to grasp them both, glancing down to be sure it was not a trick.

He stroked them once more, slow, torturously slow. He watched Harry’s face, staring in wonder as the head was tilted back down, those green eyes fluttering open to lock with his own black orbs. Harry’s hands came up to grip his shoulders and Harry cried out when Severus stroked the head of only Harry’s member with his thumb.

“Severus,” Harry gasped, tangling his fingers in the long hair and forcing him forwards for a kiss as Severus resumed stroking them both. It was demanding and needy and Severus knew Harry was close. He was just waiting for that one little sentence, holding himself back so they could come together. Severus refused to increase the speed of his stroking, he was determined to make Harry dissolve into that puddle of pure need.

Harry whined and shifted his hips, determined not to say it. But he could feel it in his throat, on the tip of his tongue. He knew it was coming, and he was powerless to stop it. He needed it, and he was fully aware that Severus would not give it to him unless he said it. Severus loved that one little sentence, and Harry couldn’t really say he wanted to deny Severus something so small, even if he did cringe afterwards.

“Severus…please…I need it…” Harry gasped out, the pleasure coursing through his every cell, just waiting for one little thing.

Severus smiled and let out his own groan of pleasure and relief. It had been torture to hold himself back, but it had been worth it. He raised his knees slightly, spreading his thighs so he could reach down, work his hand between his lovers thighs and stroke that little nub, the centre of Harry’s pleasure.

Harry crashed their lips together as he screamed, shaking as he was swept up in the hurricane of bliss, Severus screaming with him, stiffening below him. 

Pleasure, pure pleasure, coursed through both of them, sweeping away everything else, leaving them breathless.

Harry collapsed on Severus’ chest, dimly aware of his husband casting a charm to clean the water of their emissions before his arms came around him. Harry closed his eyes and basked in the afterglow, loving the feel of those smooth hands on his back, his curves, his thighs. “Love you,” Harry mumbled when his mouth decided to work again. 

“I love you,” Severus replied.

“What is that called, what we just did?” Harry asked, humming his agreement when Severus trickled water down his back from the sponge.

“I am unsure of its name. I believe it is a form of masturbation. Did you enjoy it?”

“Yes. I like that one. I like it more than the oral sex but less than when you claim me. You claiming me is my favourite. Is it okay that I have favourite things to do when we enjoy each other?” Harry asked, sitting up and turning around to lean against Severus’ chest, stretching out his stiff legs.

“It is perfectly all right. It is good for you to know what you like and what you are not so fond of,” Severus reassured, kissing the dark hair under his chin, wrapping his arms around the slender frame. “I find it very satisfying to know what will give you the greatest pleasure at the right moment. That is why I love your little sentence of need.” Severus chuckled as Harry squirmed slightly. “And I like knowing that I am the only one who gets to hear it.”

“I always forget that you like watching me enjoy myself,” Harry commented, stroking the strong slim arms.

“I consider it a good thing that you do not remember, you may get self conscious about being watched,” Severus admitted. “You may hold back, try and stop yourself. You would not enjoy it as much if you held back through embarrassment.”

Harry giggled. “I don’t think I could. You’re just too good at making me lose all ability to think. Anyways, I don’t mind you watching me. You think I’m beautiful, so I don’t mind.”

“I do. To me, you are the most beautiful creature in the world,” Severus confirmed, stroking his hair away from his forehead.

“Besides, I don’t get embarrassed with you. Well, all except my little sentence.”

Severus chuckled and nibbled his neck, running his hands along the slight curves. He hugged his lover and sighed. He didn’t want to ask, but it was playing on his mind once more. Harry was the only one he would ever ask something so private. His petite lover had shown him that it was all right to be vulnerable on occasion, but Severus would never let anyone but Harry see his insecurities.

“Harry?”

“Hmmmm?”

“Is it wrong that I am mourning him?” Severus asked quietly. Harry was silent and still for a moment, before he ran his hands along the thighs either side of his body.

“I don’t think so. He was your father. Even if he sucked at the job, he was your father. I think it’s only natural that you will mourn him, even if he was evil.”

“You really believe that?”

“Yes. I mean, I can’t think of anyone sane who mourned Voldemort,” Harry said and they both laughed. “But I think that it is absolutely all right for you to mourn Tobias, even if he was an evil son of a bitch who should have been castrated and made to eat it.” Harry took a deep breath, Severus chuckling slightly at his idea and his anger. “It’s all right with me, anyway.”

Severus smiled and hugged him a little tighter. “That is all I need. You are all I need.”

“Well, maybe not all,” Harry said logically. “You need food and sleep and outside interests and you would get…”

Severus cut him off with a kiss, silencing him from further mentions of what Severus did or didn’t need.

Severus knew what he needed. He needed Harry, Harry and all that came with him. 

Harry was all he needed.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Solarin slipped from the warm comforting embrace of Bill and made her way from the room. She padded her way along the hallways, her mind in turmoil. Bill had been doing his best to comfort her. To that end, their lovemaking earlier had been sweet, slow, gentle. 

But Bill couldn’t help her on this one. This was something she had to deal with on her own.

She found herself in the room Tobias had occupied. Moody had taken the body, the Minister would see to it that it was disposed of. Solarin would receive no punishment for her treatment of Tobias, and no action would be taken towards her for his death. He had hit her first, she had been within her rights to kill him.

The room was dark and still. The space would be stripped in the morning, all the things that man had touched were to be burnt or otherwise destroyed. Give it 24 hours and there would be no trace that he had ever been in the house. But Solarin knew he had been there, she had the bruises to prove it.

She crossed to the window and perched on the windowsill, glancing around. She was so lost in her own thoughts she didn’t notice someone else approaching the room until she heard the gasp from the doorway.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be here,” Narcissa said, turning to leave.

“It’s all right. Why are you here anyway?” Solarin asked, beckoning her in. She entered and hovered uncertainly by the door. 

“I couldn’t sleep and I was going to start stripping the room, make myself useful,” the blonde admitted. 

Solarin nodded and let her head drop, staring at her pale knees. 

“I’ll go and leave you alone,” Narcissa said.

“No, stay. Strip the room, it’s all right.”

Narcissa stared at her for a moment, her mouth open as if she wanted to say something but she thought better of it and nodded, moving to the bed and beginning to pull off the sheets, setting them in a neat pile in the centre of the mattress.

Narcissa seemed to regain her courage as she reached for the bag Tobias had arrived with.

“Do you want anything from it?” she asked the augur.

Solarin looked up, noticing the bag for the first time. She hadn’t realized that Tobias had arrived with anything. Maybe she had been too caught up in keeping her cool. She snorted. She hadn’t managed to keep her cool in the end. She had manipulated him, all to get answers that didn’t mean anything.

“I don’t know. I hadn’t thought of it,” Solarin admitted as Narcissa set the bag at her feet. “Sit down, I don’t bite.” She motioned to the chair she had sat on when she had first spoken to Tobias and Narcissa took it uncertainly.

“Why are you in here?” Narcissa asked.

“Not sure, really. I guess…I guess I wondered if I should feel something. Like maybe I should feel free, or hurt, or guilty even. But I don’t. I just feel numb. There’s nothing, not even anger anymore.” 

She looked at the blonde, measuring her up. It was the first time the two of them had been alone together. Narcissa had seen how mothering Solarin was of Phoenix, the way Phoenix had accepted her as a mother figure in a way she had never accepted Narcissa. Solarin knew Narcissa was nervous of her, that she made her uneasy. It made for a tense silence between the two Slytherin women.

“I know she will never forgive me,” Narcissa admitted. “But I will continue to try.”

“How long will you stay here?”

“Until I figure out what to do with my life. I have no money, no job, nothing. I gave it all up when I left Lucius,” Narcissa confessed. “I do not know what to do.”

“The trick is to live for yourself, to be happy in yourself,” Solarin advised and Narcissa smiled at her.

“She adores you.”

Solarin snorted. “Yeah, especially my wardrobe. I swear, she wears my clothes more than I do.”

They were silent, each trying to figure out what they wanted to say. 

“You know, when I was about three, I got up very early and spent an hour making breakfast for my father,” Solarin revealed. “I burnt the toast, the eggs were like rubber, the sausages were frozen in the middle.” She laughed. “It was such a mess. But I did it all by hand, no magic. When I was done I took it up to him in bed. He took the tray and I said to him, ‘Look, daddy, I made you breakfast. I did it all by hand, I didn’t use any magic.’ He looked at me so strangely, and my mother beside him was so still.” She paused, remembering. “He told me to stop being silly, that I would always be a freak. That I had wasted food. When I got upset he gave me a black eye.”

Narcissa made a noise of protest in the back of her throat but Solarin just looked at her, smiling slightly. 

“You didn’t think that this is the first set of bruises he’s ever given me, did you?” she asked the blonde, indicating her black and blue face, and Narcissa shook her head.

“I just didn’t expect you to reveal a story like that to me. Why are you telling me?” Narcissa enquired cautiously.

“I was just remembering and you happen to be here with me.”

“Oh.”

The augur smiled sadly and finished her tale.

“Severus came home for the holidays, and my mother told him of the breakfast incident. Spinners End was near an old factory, I think it made chairs or something. Severus used to spend a lot of time there. When he heard of the breakfast disaster, he took me there and said that I could do any magic that I wanted.” She looked directly into Narcissa’s eyes, finding the blue ones fixed on her. “We spent most of the summer there, me doing all these weird and wonderful things. Severus praised me for every single act of magic I did.”

She reached for the bag, pulling it closer to her. 

“I think that’s why I don’t feel anything about Tobias anymore. I had Severus. I never needed anyone else,” she reasoned, opening the bag. 

She pulled out clothes, chucking them at the bed. Toiletries were added to it. But at the bottom of the bag she found two items that made her stop in her tracks.

She picked them up and left the room without a single word, making her way to the kitchen and sitting at the table. She lay the objects on the scarred wood and stared at them. The first object was a book that had belonged to their mother. It had pictures of the Prince family members, it was a scrapbook of memories. But the box made Solarin’s blood boil, made fire dance along her fingertips. She was leaving scorch marks on the table but she couldn’t stop. 

The sun was rising before she was joined by another. Two others. 

“Solarin?”

She couldn’t answer, couldn’t speak. What could she possibly say?

“Sol, are you all right?”

How could he have kept them all these years? All that time she and Severus had spent looking for them, and he had them all along. What was there to say?

“Go get Bill and Severus.”

All the years she had spent questioning herself, all the times she had hated herself, hated what she was. All of it was wrapped up in that one little box. All the missing pieces of her life were in that one book. All along, he had them all along.

“Solarin? Sol, sweetheart, talk to me.”

She looked up into dark eyes, feeling warm strong hands on her shoulders. 

“Sevus,” she whispered. A flash of red hair over his shoulder. Bill. Her boys. Her heroes.

“What is it, sweetheart? Come on, tell me,” Severus urged.

She grabbed the box and pushed it to him. He took one look at it and pulled her onto his lap, rocking her. Bill came forwards and she was passed to him, Severus sighing as he pulled the lid off of the battered metal box.

“Serena,” Severus muttered.

It was a trigger, a catalyst for her anger. That one little word sparked an anger in her that she couldn’t stop, couldn’t control. It filled her, searing through her veins, making her blood boil. It was more than she had ever felt before, and that girl had been the reason for all of it. If Serena hadn’t been the way she was, Solarin never would have hated herself. It was all her fault. Blue electricity began to dance over her skin as she began to lose herself in her fury.

“Severus,” Bill said uncertainly, feeling something rise in his girl, something so strong it was overwhelming. He couldn’t even identify what it was, it was too strong. He had never felt something so powerful.

Severus looked up to see Solarin shaking in pure unadulterated rage. Severus had never seen her so angry and he knew that this was not good. He turned to Sirius, who had come and woken him and Bill, and ordered him to unlock the door to the garden, the only space that could possibly handle whatever she was about to throw out. Sirius ran from the room and Severus ordered Remus to call Moody and Dumbledore immediately. He took a slim arm and Bill took the other, the two of them guiding her to the door Sirius was holding open. 

They set her down in the middle of the overgrown field sized garden and retreated back inside, closing the door behind them. They watched her from the window.

She was still for a moment and then she exploded. 

Literally. 

The whole house shook with the force of it, and all the plants in the garden were incinerated. Her cry, amplified by her magic, woke everyone in the house, and they all came barrelling down the stairs to investigate. They watched her eruption in shock, and Mad-Eye placed a hand on Severus’ shoulder.

“It’s been a long time coming, Severus. You did the right thing by putting her in the garden,” Moody praised.

Severus pulled Harry into his arms and held him as she collapsed, screaming for all she was worth. Small areas of dirt were thrown up in the air as she continued to meltdown, and her whole body was engulfed by bright blue flames.

“Why is she like that?” Harry asked nervously, Miri silent in his arms. The rage was far too big for the baby to comprehend, so she snuggled against her carrier, yawning sleepily. Harry had grabbed her in his panic, so she was still half asleep.

Severus held up a battered photo for Harry to see. It was of Severus, baby Solarin and another girl. The Severus in the photo could not have been more than fourteen, Solarin no more than a year, and the girl was, in Harry’s estimate, about sixteen.

“The girl, her name is Serena. Was Serena. She was my older sister. She was a Squib…or maybe a Muggle, I never found out,” Severus explained. “She died a week after this was taken, car accident. My father never hit Serena, never yelled at her. Serena was his angel because she had no magic. After she died, Tobias never let me and Sol forget her. Sol has always felt that, if she was like Serena, Tobias would have loved her too. In her mind, she has lived in Serena’s shadow her whole life, that one girl making Sol hate everything about her abilities. She has been angry about Serena her whole life, bottling it up.”

“So, she’s getting it all out?” Harry asked, Bill peering at the photo briefly before he returned to watching the elder augur.

“Yes. She will feel much better when she is done. We just wait, let her vent it all.”

They watched her for a while before Remus spoke.

“Now we can have your birthday in the garden, Harry. Sol has cleared it for us.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Severus propped himself up on one elbow and watched Harry sleep, the brunet snuggled against his chest. Harry shifted in his slumber and Severus ran a hand down his back, soothing him. Harry rubbed his nose along the chest and then settled once more, his hand coming to lay on Severus’ ribs.

It had been a calm week for the family after Solarin had exploded. They had spent the week enjoying each others company, talking more than anything. Arthur and Molly had spent the week doing up the demolished garden, and it was now an Eden.

Solarin had remained her old self, but she was somehow lighter now. Her smiles were no longer faked and her temper seemed to have settled somewhat, though she still had her moments. 

The only major change was Narcissa’s absence from the house. Albus had finally admitted defeat in trying to get Phoenix to talk with her mother, and he had employed her at Hogwarts as his secretary. It was the best he could do at such short notice, but no one was complaining, not even Narcissa. The job came with lodgings in Hogwarts itself. No one had been sad to see her go.

Severus caressed the soft skin under his hands, Harry moaning in his sleep and trying to get closer. An impossibility as there was no space left between them, but to Severus it seemed as if Harry was trying to burrow under his skin, so close that they could never be separated. He liked it. He leaned down and kissed the lightening bolt scar, Harry humming in contentment. Severus called his name softly, waking him.

“Morning,” Harry mumbled sleepily.

“Good morning,” Severus said, the green eyes blinking open to look up at him.

“What time is it?”

“A little before five.”

Harry glanced confusedly at the clock and then at the baby monitor. “Why are you waking me so early if Miri isn’t asking to be fed?” Harry asked in concern. “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine. I just wanted to give you a birthday gift before everyone else awoke.”

Harry sat up and rubbed his eyes as Severus placed a box on his lap. He grinned at it and kissed his husband. “What is it?” Harry asked excitedly, running his fingers along the red ribbon.

“Open it and see,” Severus teased, plucking a smaller box from his nightstand.

Harry pulled at the ribbon and ripped off the green paper, opening the box he found.

“A Pensieve?” Harry asked, tracing the runic engravings on the bowl with his thumb. 

“Yes. This goes with it,” Severus said, handing him the smaller box. Harry opened it to find a tiny vial of swirling white memory.

“Who’s memory is it?”

“Mine. It is something I want you to see, something you deserve to see.”

Harry stared at the tiny bottle, rubbing the smooth glass with his thumb. Severus was going to show him one of his memories? Why? What was it of?

“Why?” Harry asked. “Why do you want me to see it?”

“Because you asked for it,” Severus said simply. “You asked for your parents for your birthday. This is the closest I could get.”

Harry’s jaw dropped and he held the vial up to the faint morning light. It was such a tiny bottle, it could only contain one memory.

“Will you come with me to look at it?” Harry asked, picking at the sealing wax.

“If you want me to.”

“I do.”

Severus kissed him and uncorked the bottle, pouring the contents into the Pensieve where they swirled, not quite liquid, but not quite gas either. Severus sat patiently, waiting for Harry to enter the memory. It was Harry’s choice to look at it. No matter how much Severus wanted him to see it, he would not force Harry to view it.

Harry took a deep breath and leaned forwards, the tip of his nose dipping into the cold substance. He felt himself pulled in, and then he was falling, tumbling down into the past.

He landed on his feet in a tiny living room. The room was well kept and had the appearance of being loved. It was painted Slytherin green. There was a teddy bear lying on the sofa, and a tiny pair of socks lying on the coffee table. A blue pair of child’s shoes were lying beside the sofa. Harry could see the kitchen from where he stood, it was part of the living room, separated by only a breakfast bar. 

Severus landed beside him and Harry slipped his hand into the larger one, feeling the slim fingers entwine with his.

“Where are we?” Harry asked.

“We are in Hogsmeade. This is where me and Solarin lived when we were younger, after I gained custody of her. Before this we lived in a little bed-sit for a few months. Albus helped us to sort out the lease of this cottage,” Severus clarified and Harry peered around, taking in the child’s drawings framed and mounted on the walls, the potion ingredients sitting on a section of the kitchen counter. Through the glass kitchen door he could see a garden gone wild, magical and muggle plants all twining together. To Harry’s right was an open wooden door, which he assumed led to the other rooms, and behind him was the front door. There were small windows letting in warm summer sunshine. To Harry’s left was a fireplace, small framed photos placed on the mantle.

As Harry opened his mouth to speak, a tiny Solarin in nothing but her knickers scampered in and hid behind the sofa, giggling. In her arms was the doll the older Solarin had showed him. It was wearing a yellow dress and someone had put its black hair in pigtails. A moment later, a young Severus entered, carrying a blue sleeveless summer dress. He could not have been more than twenty. He looked irritated but he was smiling, so Harry supposed she must have done this often. Harry and adult Severus stepped back to watch the scene play out.

“Solarin, come out. If you do not get dressed, we will be late,” Severus said, hands on hips. He sighed. “Well, if you do not want to go, I suppose I shall call Albus and cancel.”

She came hurtling out, throwing herself at him. He grabbed her and swung her high, tickling her. The two of them looked so relaxed. 

Severus sat down on the sofa and Solarin stood before him, letting him wriggle her into the dress. She sat on his lap obediently as he slipped on her socks and shoes, and then brushed and braided her hair. She was wriggling in excitement, twiddling the pigtails of her doll. Harry noticed it was almost as big as she was.

“You take too long, Sevus,” she complained, poking the end of his nose, and Harry giggled at her baby voice.

“Well, we would be ready by now if you hadn’t decided to play hide and seek,” Severus reasoned.

Harry turned to his Severus. “Solarin really has always been short, hasn’t she?” he asked, and Severus smiled at him.

“Yes, she has. Don’t say that to her, though. She takes great offence at only being five feet tall,” Severus advised and they turned their attention back to the memory.

Solarin had scampered to the window, walking right through Harry, and was peering out, waiting for something. The something arrived moments later and she began to jump up and down excitedly.

“He’s here! He’s here!” she called and Severus threw down the copy of the Daily Prophet he was reading. He scooped her up, grabbing her doll as it slipped from her arms, and left the room, Harry and adult Severus following.

Severus and Solarin made their way to the carriage waiting outside their front gate and climbed in, Solarin clambering into Hagrid’s huge lap. Hagrid chuckled and let her grip the reins of the thestral pulling it. 

Harry and adult Severus climbed in the back, and all of them were transported up to Hogwarts. Harry followed, his hand still clutching his husbands, as Severus and Solarin made their way through the castle and up to Dumbledore’s office.

Severus set Solarin on her feet and gave her the once over, fastening a button on her dress that had managed to escape his notice. He took her hand and knocked. 

Harry watched in amazement as Severus and Solarin entered, Severus going forwards to meet a woman holding a baby. Harry’s jaw dropped as he realized he was looking at his mother. It was him she was holding.

“You’re showing me this?” Harry breathed, Severus’ arms coming around him from behind.

“Yes. I wanted you to see it. You have no memory of her. I felt that you should see her at least, that you should get to see the last time I saw her. I have no good memories of your father, so this was the best I could do,” Severus explained.

Harry pulled him in for a kiss before he turned to watch the memory play out.

Solarin ran forwards to barrel into Albus’ arms, the old wizard lifting her miniscule weight easily and asking her how she was that morning. 

Severus approached Lily and stood awkwardly for a moment before she adjusted baby Harry on her hip and leaned in to hug him. He hugged her back, careful not to crush the infant gazing around curiously.

“Hello, Sev. How are you?” she asked. Her voice had been soft, gentle. She smiled gently at Severus.

“I am very well. How are you?” he asked, smiling back at her, glancing at baby Harry.

She laughed and, to Harry, it was beautiful. It was light and sweet. “Tired. A baby is no easy job,” she joked, bringing baby Harry forwards so his green eyes could catch sight of Severus. “Sev, this is my son, Harry.” She looked at Harry. “Harry, this is Severus, mummy’s friend. Say hello.”

Harry stared at Severus for a moment before he reached out his arms to him, asking to be held. Severus glanced to Lily for permission and, on her nod, he took Harry into his arms.

“Hello, Harry,” Severus said and Harry uttered a true baby ‘haro’, waving his little hand. He reached up and grabbed Severus’ hair, yanking on it, giggling.

“Some things never change,” adult Severus muttered in his ear and Harry grinned.

Younger Severus expertly freed his hair and smiled at Harry, looking down as Solarin tugged on his trouser leg. She was tugging at her braid and appeared nervous. 

“Can I play with the dolly? It would look pretty in my dolly clothes. I’ll swap you,” she asked quietly, holding up her doll to Severus. 

Severus bit his lip to keep from laughing and handed Harry back to Lily, crouching down so he was closer to Solarin’s level.

“Sol, this is not a dolly. This is a baby, a real person, like you and me,” Severus explained and she peered at Harry interestedly, hugging her doll. It hugged her back.

“So I can’t play with him?” Solarin asked.

“No, you can play with him, but you have to be gentle with him. He is a lot more easy to break than your doll.”

Severus stood as she nodded. She hid behind Severus leg as she noticed who was holding Harry. Lily smiled at her and she hid her face.

“Why is she doing that?” older Harry asked his Severus. “Sol isn’t like that now.”

“No, she is not. You are seeing Sol at seven years old. She was not yet broken of all her timid behaviour. She still had some lingering effects of Tobias at this point. She had only met Lily once before, she was unsure of her this time,” Severus explained and Harry nodded, watching the tiny augur chew her lip and scuff the floor with the toe of her shoe as Lily set Harry on his feet.

Baby Harry began to toddle away as Lily crouched down to talk to Solarin.

“Hello, Sol. Do you remember me?” she asked and Solarin nodded, still tugging at her hair. “That’s good, because I remember you. You’re the special little girl and you like things to be blue. I like your dress.”

It seemed to be some kind of trigger, because Solarin grinned and, suddenly, Lily’s hair was blue. Severus paled as Lily peered at her hair before laughing.

“I see you do remember me,” Lily joked. “That is a very clever trick. What a clever little witch you are. Can you change it back? Are you clever enough to do that?”

A blink from Solarin and her hair was auburn again. “I like it blue. It looks pretty,” Solarin stated.

“Well, it is very pretty blue, but I think my husband would much prefer it to be red. He likes it that way,” Lily explained.

“Oh. I suppose that’s all right then. I’ll leave it the way it is.”

Lily smiled and glanced around, leaping up and grabbing Harry as he made an attempt to reach for Fawkes the phoenix, who had been strutting around on the floor. Fawkes cried out, flying up to his perch and looking offended, and Lily carried Harry over to the two brunettes. She knelt down, holding Harry to her even though he was on his own two tiny feet. Older Harry noticed that he and Solarin had been roughly the same size despite the six year age gap, she had been that small.

“Solarin, this is Harry. He’s my little boy,” Lily introduced and Solarin stared at Harry for a moment, her mind working. 

“You’re his mummy?” she asked.

“Yes, I am.”

“And you take care of him, like Sevus takes care of me?”

“Yes.”

Solarin tilted her head to the side, staring at the baby boy, before she took Harry’s little hand in her own and shook it.

“Hello, Harry. I’m Sarin,” she said, mangling her own name.

Harry shrieked and pushed forwards, grabbing her hair. She grinned and pulled gently at his and he laughed.

“Shall we go outside?” Severus asked, picking up his little brunette as Lily grabbed hers.

“Good idea. They can break far too many things in here. Albus had the house elves set up a picnic by the Quidditch pitch for us,” she said and the two of them waved to Dumbledore before making their way from the room.

The two adults made their way through the hallways in silence, the two little ones wriggling to try and get down.

Harry and Severus followed them, Harry impressed by the two managing to keep hold of the little ones through their squirming.

“Sol was so sweet,” Harry commented and Severus snorted.

“She had her moments,” he agreed.

“It’s a shame I can’t remember this. It looks like a fun day,” Harry said.

“A shame. That is why I am showing it you. Are you enjoying it?”

Harry nodded and returned to his gift as the four reached the blanket. Solarin and Harry began to toddle off together, before they were grabbed by Severus. Older Harry sat down a little way from the blanket and watched, older Severus sitting behind him and pulling him to lean against his chest.

“Sol, what did I tell you about Harry?” Severus asked, holding a child in each arm.

“He’s not a doll and he breaks real easy so I have to be gentle,” she recited.

“Good girl. Now, don’t wander too far from the blanket, stay where we can see you.”

“We will. Can we go play now?”

“Yes.”

Severus released them and Solarin took Harry’s hand, the little girl going slow so Harry could keep up with her on his unsteady little legs. They stopped a few metres away from their guardians and Solarin glanced at Severus, who nodded. Lily laughed beside him. 

Solarin sat Harry down and moved a little way from him, conjuring a ball of light that changed colour. She sat down and rolled it to him. He squealed in delight and pushed it back, the little augur smiling from ear to ear at having someone to play her games with her.

“You worry too much, Sev. What trouble could they possibly get into?” Lily asked, sniggering.

“You have only ever seen Sol in a good mood. Trust me, you will want to keep an eye on her,” Severus said evasively, avoiding her gaze.

Lily sighed. “He’s not coming to take her from you, Severus. You can relax once in a while, you know,” she soothed and he hung his head.

He rubbed the back of his neck and picked up Solarin’s doll. He ran his fingers over the dress and stared at his sister, who was making twigs dance for Harry’s amusement.

“I worry about her. What kind of life is it for her, being what she is? I was perhaps wrong in letting her run wild with it. What if she cannot be reigned in?” Severus questioned. Lily stayed silent, smiling gently at him as he reeled off his worries. “What if she never learns to control it? And what if she never learns to appreciate it for what it is? It is a gift but because of that fucking man she doesn’t see it that way. She refuses to do her clairvoyance lessons, and Mad-Eye is the only one who can truly control her, she even plays up for Albus. What if I am doing it wrong?”

Lily pulled him in for a hug as he finished. “You know what I think? I think that you worry too much. Remember last time? She couldn’t, or wouldn’t, change my hair back. You had to do it,” Lily reassured. “Look at what she’s doing, Sev. She has a lot of control already. She couldn’t control herself that way when I saw her last.”

Severus glanced at his friend before letting his eyes land on the two children. Solarin was floating flowers, making them dance around Harry, who kept trying to grab them.

“She will learn to love what she is, truly love it. And it is only natural that she would have her rough moments, considering her experiences. Just give her time, she’ll come into her own. And as for the lessons, she is just stubborn. Reminds me of another Snape I know,” she teased and he snorted.

“Well, what of Harry? That child looks suspiciously like an arrogant Gryffindor that I love to loathe,” he teased and she chuckled at him. “I cannot believe you not only married that swine, but you had offspring with him. Are you sure Harry even qualifies as human life?”

She slapped his arm as he grinned at her shocked expression. “I’ll thank you to not call my son ‘offspring’, and James is a good man.”

Severus pointed to the clear blue sky. “Oh look, a flying pig,” he said sarcastically and she huffed in annoyance.

“Are we going to spend the rest of the afternoon bickering about James? Because if we are I don’t see the point in me coming to see you,” she mumbled and he pulled her in for a hug.

“I don’t mean it. It’s just me and James, you know we’ll never get along. Just tell me he makes you happy,” he said and she smiled, relaxing into the hug. 

“He makes me very happy, Sev. I am very happy with him.”

“And is he a good father?”

“Very good. Almost as good a parent as you are,” she praised. “I don’t think any of us could truly handle that girl. I’m impressed by your parenting skills.”

He smiled. “Thank you. I will admit I have help with her, though.”

“I’m not surprised. I’m just glad James hasn’t met her. Glad for you, I mean. Can you imagine the pranks she’d be pulling if they met?” she said, horrified. “Now that would be a problem child.”

They laughed, grimacing at thoughts of what James could teach the little mischief maker.

“She did make a very strange prediction the other day, when Mad-Eye actually managed to get her to do her lesson,” Severus admitted.

“What did she tell you?” Lily asked, nibbling on a sandwich.

“She told me that I would be very happy if I was married to James Potter.”

Severus shuddered while Lily choked on her bite of ham sandwich. “You’re pulling my leg,” she insisted, taking a sip of pumpkin juice.

“I wish.”

Lily looked thoughtful and then grinned wickedly. “Maybe she was merely off by a generation. Maybe she meant Harry.”

This time it was Severus’ turn to choke on the bite of cucumber he had just taken and Lily had to clap him on the back. He gasped in much needed air and looked at her, horrified.

“Not to divulge too much, but I would like to get laid sometime this decade, thank you,” he said and she dissolved into a fit of giggles. “You are a horrific woman, do you know that? Me and Harry? You’re barking mad. He’s a baby. And he’s related to James bloody Potter. Not a good combination. He’ll probably end up a Gryffindor to boot. No way, not in a million years.”

She was still laughing, tears rolling down her face, and Solarin glanced up at her, her distracted attention causing the ball of light to bonk Harry on the head. He blinked in surprise before screeching at her in protest. She looked back to the game and tottered over to him, rubbing his head and apologising. She conjured a smaller ball of light, a bright Gryffindor red, and passed it to him, Harry waving it about in delight.

Severus glared at her as she stopped laughing.

“It was only a suggestion,” Lily offered and he took a bite of carrot stick to keep himself from saying something he would regret.

“How is James? And his miscreant acquaintances? Let’s pretend I care,” Severus asked after a moment, changing the subject. It was probably not the best subject to choose, though.

“James is pissed off that I would come to see you. Sirius and Remus are dong very well, they just got themselves a little flat in London. They’re loving being out from living with Remus’ parents. All three think I’m mad to bring Harry to meet you. Peter’s too busy working all the time to pass comment, which I’m thankful for. Three of them is bad enough. Honestly, you boys never change. James told me this morning that you probably spend your time warming the Dark Lord’s bed, little sod,” she said angrily and Severus paled, looking away in shame. Her eyes narrowed in suspicion and disbelief. “Is it true? Are you sleeping with him?”

Her question was quiet, he could have ignored it if he had chosen, but he answered her.

“Not out of choice,” he mumbled and she looked horrified at what he was implying.

Older Harry turned his head and captured his husbands lips, the kiss sweet and gentle. Severus kissed him back and hugged him tighter.

“I’m sorry,” Harry said softly. “I’m sorry you had to go through that.”

“Don’t be. It is not your fault. It was not mine either. Both of us have been the playthings of evil men, so I consider it to be a blessing that we have each other now. Besides, my experiences allow me to understand yours better. We are together, that is all that matters now,” Severus said, brushing Harry’s fringe from his forehead and kissing his scar. Harry grinned.

“I thought you didn’t want to be with me?” he asked innocently and Severus laughed.

“I did not know you then. And you must admit there is a rather large age gap between us. I was younger then, and you were a baby. Also, my own prejudices against your father may have been clouding my judgement,” Severus reasoned. “It did seem like an insane prediction at the time.”

Harry kissed him once more before returning to his birthday present.

“Why would you stay if he does that to you, Severus? Why would you put yourself through that? I know you have your reasons for becoming a Death Eater in the first place, even if you won’t tell me what they are, but there is no reason on earth for you to go through that,” Lily questioned.

“I joined so he would stay away from Sol,” Severus admitted. “If I am his slave, he will stay away from her. Can you imagine what his mind would do to her? And how much he would use her? Can you picture how much sway he would have were he to have her in his grasp, how he would manipulate her? I joined to protect her. It is also the reason I put up with it. I remain a slave, and a spy for the Order, to protect her. I would not do it for any other reason.”

Lily’s mouth worked soundlessly as she stared at the tiny girl playing with her son. “She really does mean everything to you, doesn’t she?”

He looked at her, his black eyes boring into her green ones. “Doesn’t Harry mean everything to you? What would you do to keep him safe?” Severus asked and she froze. 

Harry knew his mother was realizing that her hiding under the Fidelius Charm was no different to Severus being a slave to Voldemort. They were both doing what they had to.

“She is safe, that is all that matters to me. When I cannot be with her, when I am summoned, Albus cares for her, she stays with him. It is not perfect, but I must consider what she is. A being like Sol needs a certain type of care. She must be protected. She has been done too much damage already. I will not let it happen again. I will do what I must to care for her,” Severus said firmly and Lily nodded, rubbing his shoulder in a show of understanding and support.

Lily took a deep breath; she seemed to be dredging up all of her Gryffindor courage. “Severus, you are my best friend. It’s for that reason I am about to ask you for a very big favour,” she said and he nodded for her to continue, munching on a stick of celery.

“If something should happen to me and James…if Harry arrives here at eleven and we are not around…will you watch over him?”

“What do you mean watch over him?” Severus asked. It was obvious that he did not need to question her not being around. It was clear to both of them that there was the real risk of baby Harry growing up without his parents.

Older Harry snuggled further into his husbands embrace, watching his mother ask the hardest question she had ever asked in her life.

“I mean, he does not just look like James, he has his moments when I am sure he is James’ clone. Can you imagine him being raised by Sirius and Remus? I love Sirius, I think he is a wonderful man, but he does like his pranks.”

“I remember all too well,” Severus snarled.

“I know you do.” She sighed, worrying her lower lip. “I want my son to be safe, Severus. He is a special little boy, more special than you could imagine. He needs watching over, he needs protecting. Protecting from himself, protecting from others. I know you will do that. I know I can trust you to keep him safe,” Lily said firmly and Severus peered at her.

“What do you mean, special?” Severus asked and she swallowed. 

Older Harry realized that she had been about to tell her friend what he was. Harry held his breath, but she never revealed it, she merely covered her tracks.

“I mean the prophecy,” Lily said quietly and Severus looked guilty.

“I am so sorry, Lily. If I could have stopped him…”

“I know. It is not your fault, Sev. I don’t see how you could have stopped him ripping it out of your head. Albus told us what a state you were in when you returned from that meeting. I don’t blame you. And it cannot be changed now, so don’t feel so guilty about it,” she soothed. She hugged him and the two fell silent for a while.

Older Harry turned to peer at his husband. He found him staring sadly at the redhead of his past.

“I did not want to tell him, Harry. I overheard Sybil make the prophecy to Albus. Once the Dark Lord discovered I knew something, he ripped it from my mind. I tried to stop him, I really did…” Severus explained quietly.

Harry cut him off with a kiss. “I know. You had no choice. I understand. It was not your fault,” Harry reassured. He paused. “She was talking about me being a hermaphrodite, wasn’t she?”

“I believe so. I believe she lost her nerve at the last moment. I do not blame her. I am glad she did not tell me. The Dark Lord could have ripped that information out of my head also. I am thankful he never discovered your special status.”

Harry shuddered and kissed his husband. “I’m yours,” Harry said firmly. “Always yours.”

Severus smiled at him and kissed his neck, motioning to the memory. Harry returned to it, safe in his lovers embrace.

Lily pulled back and forced Severus to look her in the eye.

“Severus, if he arrives for his time at Hogwarts and we are not around, it is likely he will get himself into trouble. I just want to be able to relax, to know that he will not get himself killed. Will you watch over him and make sure he does not drown in the lake or blow himself up in potions? Will you make sure he does not accidentally kill himself playing some foolish prank?” she asked and Severus smiled at her.

“I will watch over him. I will not coddle him, he is, after all, James’ son. Let us not hope for a miracle. But I will make sure he does not meet a sticky end pulling some prank or through lack of concentration in potions. I will watch over him for you,” Severus promised and she smiled, Severus pulling her into his arms for a hug of reassurance. When they pulled back, both of their eyes were swimming with tears. “Those children should eat something.”

Severus called for Harry and Solarin and the two of them came toddling over, hand in hand. Lily burst into peals of laughter as she caught sight of her son and Severus groaned.

Harry’s hair was blue, and his skin was red and green striped. Solarin had even changed his clothes to a bright pink.

“Sol, change him back right now,” Severus ordered as soon as they stepped onto the blanket, Harry walking over to plop down in his mothers lap, babbling away to her.

“But I was gentle with him,” Solarin said, sitting in Severus’ lap and taking the sandwich Lily offered to her. “And he looks pretty like this.”

“Yes, I know you were, and he does look very…colourful, but I’m sure Lily would like to take him home looking the same way he did when he arrived here,” Severus explained.

“But she’s smiling. She doesn’t look mad,” Solarin reasoned, slightly muffled through her bite of sandwich.

“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” Severus instructed automatically. He sighed. “Sol, I know that you changing the way he looks is a very clever trick. You are very special to be able to do that. But it is time to change him back.”

Solarin stared at Harry for a moment before she nodded. A moment later and he was back to his original appearance, gnawing happily on a carrot stick that Lily had given him.

“Good girl,” Severus praised. 

The afternoon passed smoothly, and as the sun began to set Dumbledore made his way over to the four on the blanket, holding a camera. 

Older Harry watched as the four stood for the picture, as Dumbledore assured them he would get them both a copy. All too soon, Harry and Severus were following the memory figures back to Dumbledore’s office. Lily gave Solarin the blue dress for her doll, the little girl practically glowing as she immediately began to change the toy, and promised Severus that she and Harry would visit just before Christmas. Harry watched sadly as his mother said goodbye to Severus and Solarin, the two Snape’s saying their own farewells. And then she was gone.

Harry found himself sitting in bed, Severus sitting beside him and pulling the memory back into its bottle. Harry sat silently as Severus placed the Pensieve on the dresser, the vial beside it, before he climbed back into bed. Harry glanced at the clock. It was half five. They had been gone only half an hour, but to Harry it felt like a lifetime.

“Are you all right, Harry? Should I not have shown it to you?” Severus asked quietly and Harry shook his head.

“No, I love it. It was a wonderful gift. It’s just sad that she made plans to see you again and she never got to do them,” Harry mumbled. Severus pulled him into his arms and lay them down, cradling Harry against his chest. “I understand why you wanted me to have it in private. Can I look at it again some other time?”

“You can look at it whenever you want, love. It is yours to keep,” Severus said and Harry smiled.

Harry sniggered. “You were right, you were a neurotic parent back then. You had the same worries that I do,” Harry said. “I like knowing that.” Harry snuggled closer, resting his head against the strong chest to hear the steady beat of Severus’ heart. “She asked you to watch over me. You never told me that you watched me because she asked.”

“Well, now you know. I saved you in your first year because of the debt I owed your father, but I continued to protect you because your mother asked me to. Does our past make sense to you now?” Severus asked.

“Yes. I like knowing that you’ve always been there, making sure I didn’t get myself killed. Nothing has really changed, you’re still protecting me. You seem to be very good at it. Must be years of practice.”

Severus hummed in agreement and Harry slipped his hand under the t-shirt Severus had slept in, circling a nipple. Severus gasped in surprise and Harry took the opportunity to kiss him, snaking his tongue inside.

“I want to thank you for your gift. I love it,” Harry said suggestively against his lips and Severus smiled. Harry grabbed his wand and spelled away their clothes.

“You are getting very good at misusing your magic,” Severus commented as Harry placed his wand on his bedside cabinet.

“I am, aren’t I? But you have to admit, I do it to get very good effects,” Harry said as he reached down and cupped Severus’ hardening member.

“Oh, I like the effects,” Severus moaned, clutching Harry’s hip.

They were on their sides, facing one another, and Harry stole another kiss, taking Severus’ hand and bringing it down between his thighs. He hooked one leg over Severus’ hip and ran his fingers through his hair.

“Check,” Harry instructed and Severus wandlessly summoned the lube, coating his fingers with it before dropping the tube between them. He slipped his hand down and kissed his husband as he stroked him, making Harry moan and thrust into his hand. He nibbled his neck as he slipped a finger into him, finding him wet with anticipation, Harry groaning. He eased in another and felt a grin break across his face as Harry pushed down for more. He moved, stroking the inside of Harry’s body and Harry smiled at him.

“I think you’re ready, love,” Severus said and Harry sighed in relief.

“Finally. Can you claim me now?”

“Yes, I can claim you now.”

“At long last,” Harry said and pulled Severus into a kiss, fiery and possessive. He pushed Severus onto his back and straddled his hips, leaning down to keep the kiss going, their tongues duelling.

Severus grabbed the lube and coated his tumescent shaft. It had been a long time since they had joined and he didn’t want there to be any pain on Harry’s part. He slipped gentle fingers into him, stroking the tender flesh, spreading the slick gel as he teased his lover. He moved himself into position and froze. He managed to catch himself from sinking into that tight heat as he remembered that Harry’s potion would not be ready until tomorrow. Harry was still unprotected. He broke the kiss and reached for his wand, Harry looking at him in surprise.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked, his hands splayed across Severus’ chest. He could feel Severus poised below him, why hadn’t Severus told him he was ready? Why was Severus holding his wand? Why was he still waiting, damn it?

“Contraceptive charm,” Severus said and Harry nodded, chewing his lip to keep himself patient. Severus cast the spell and watched as Harry glowed blue briefly. Harry giggled.

“It tickles,” Harry explained and Severus smiled at him, chucking his wand away to land somewhere across the room. He kissed Harry’s wrist.

“I’m ready for you now, love.”

Harry grinned and sunk down slowly, the two of them moaning. Harry lay down on Severus chest as he waited for his body to adjust, Severus stroking his spine with one hand and gripping his thigh with the other. It was heaven, the feel of Severus inside him once again, knowing that there was nothing in the whole world that felt as good as being claimed by his lover. He wriggled experimentally and found no discomfort, so he kissed the broad chest and sat up, smiling at his lover. He began to move, slowly at first, taking his time. He sighed as Severus’ hands gripped his hips, guiding him.

“Too long,” Harry moaned, his eyes fluttering shut. “I’ve missed this.”

“Me too, love,” Severus agreed, his knees coming up as the green eyes opened to lock with his onyx ones. Oh God, the heat, the pressure, the sinful feel of Harry moving on him, around him. It was practically too much, and he almost lost it right there and then. The sight of Harry’s fluid arching, the feel of his hands gripping Severus’ shoulders, the sound of his breathy moans. God, Severus had missed it so much, he could barely contain himself. Neither of them would last very long, he knew that, they were much too desperate for that. But it was enough for now just to be able to join. Severus began to thrust up to meet him, Harry’s cries getting louder at the movement. Thank Merlin for one way Silencing Charms. They could hear noises from outside the room, but no one could hear them. A blessing, with Harry’s ex-con and werewolf fathers within hearing distance.

Harry gasped, trying to make it last, to hold himself back. But it had been too long, he couldn’t. The other things they had done, the oral sex, the bathtub, the touches and caresses, they had been good. Not good enough, though. Nothing was good enough to match this. This was a whole other level of pleasure and Harry loved it, loved the feel of Severus inside him, of those hands on his hips. 

Severus grit his teeth, forcing himself to hold back. Harry needed this, needed him. Oh Merlin, that pale skin under his hands, that tight heat. No. He would wait, hold back until Harry was there with him, until Harry was shaking and screaming with the force of it. Oh, those moans, those fingers tangled in his hair. No. He would restrain himself from getting there before him. They had waited so long for it, he would not waste it with his neglected libido. His pleasure belonged to Harry, he would hang on. But when Harry kissed him, he was sorely tested.

Harry moaned and pulled Severus in for a kiss, the two of them moving faster, harder, more desperate. Harry shifted, trying to make it last. All he managed to do was drive Severus deeper, making him throw his head back and call his lovers name in delight. He didn’t even care about his embarrassment, not now, not this time.

“Severus, please, I need it,” Harry cried out, Severus moaning in agreement. He felt the mans hand move, grab his own and wrap it around himself. Harry knew the way to do it now, Severus had guided him in it many times. He stroked himself, rubbing his thumb over the head the way Severus had shown him. And then there was Severus’ finger, rubbing him, his balls cradled in Severus’ palm. And that was it, he lost himself, swept away in the tidal wave of bliss that only his husband could bring, only with his gentle claiming.

Severus screamed at the tight clenching of Harry around him, the sound of his lover crying out his name in pleasure, the sight of Harry losing himself. Severus let himself go, let himself get pulled into it. He felt his seed erupt, filling his sweet Harry, and he gasped, trying to remember how to breathe. Harry collapsed on his chest and Severus wrapped his own shaking arms around the trembling frame, his body trying to pull in oxygen.

Later, much later, they finally regained some margin of competency and Harry shifted, causing Severus to slip from his body. Harry moaned at the loss, suddenly feeling empty. 

“That was wicked,” Harry said.

“Exquisite. It was well worth the wait, in my opinion,” Severus agreed, rolling them to their sides, not willing to let go of Harry just yet. Harry had his fingers tangled in Severus’ hair, one of his legs thrown over Severus’ hip. Severus couldn’t stop running his hand along the bare curve of his side, accentuated by the rise of Harry’s hip. His other hand was trapped under Harry’s head, and he let his fingers toy with the soft raven tresses.

“Definitely worth it.” Harry glanced at the clock. Damn, they had been at it for an hour and a half. How had they managed to make it last that long? He wasn‘t sure how long they had lain there, basking in the afterglow. “We should get up and get dressed. Well, after a shower. Miri will want feeding in twenty minutes. I swear, that girl has better timekeeping than you do,” Harry said, sliding his hand down Severus’ sweaty back.

Severus chuckled. “We can shower together,” he said suggestively and Harry kissed him. 

‘Best birthday morning I’ve ever had,’ Harry thought to himself as they eased themselves under the hot water.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Harry found himself sat at the breakfast table surrounded by more gifts than he had ever been given before. He felt for sure that they would outnumber all the other gifts he had ever received and then some. He stared in disbelief at them, Severus smiling at his shock. The whole of their odd family were gathered around the breakfast table, Arthur and Bill had even taken the day off work. Harry felt himself grow uncomfortable, so many people, so many gifts.

“They can’t all be for me,” Harry said quietly, feeling a blush rise. 

“They are, love. They are all for you. Keep in mind you have a very large family now,” Severus said gently, watching him carefully.

“But I said I didn’t want a fuss. It’s too much just for me,” Harry mumbled and Severus pulled him onto his lap.

“Did you really think that anyone would listen when you said that? Harry, it is your seventeenth. Everyone wanted to make a fuss. We did not get to spend Christmas with you, we are making up for it. Will you, for once, let us make a huge commotion over you?” Severus reasoned and Harry shrugged, laying his head on his shoulder. “Harry, look at Sirius and Remus.” Harry glanced over to find them looking every inch the proud parents, even if Remus did still look sickly. “They want to make a big celebration of their boy on his coming of age.”

“I know but…”

Severus waited silently, the rest of their family talking amongst themselves to give Severus the time to soothe the Gryffindor with some semblance of privacy. Severus knew that Harry had low self esteem issues, years of living with the Dursley’s had seen to that. Harry honestly didn’t think he was worth all the trouble his family had gone to, no matter what Severus said to change his thinking. Severus wondered how he would handle the dinner.

Harry huffed. “I’ve never had a big birthday, I don’t know how to handle this,” Harry whispered.

“The trick is to sit back and enjoy it. You are the birthday boy, today is your day. Let Remus and Sirius do this, just allow them this one day. They will make the same fuss over Nixie’s seventeenth, it is not just you who is receiving this treatment. Just try to relax into it. And I am right here with you,” Severus instructed. Harry huffed and Severus grinned, moving down a different path. “You and I could celebrate something different.” Harry locked eyes with him and he leaned in to whisper in his ear. “We could celebrate that you are no longer jailbait.”

A moment of still silence and then Harry laughed. “All right, I will celebrate today,” Harry finally agreed. “But I don’t guarantee that I won’t find it too much at some point.”

Severus kissed him, letting him know that he could slip out at any time and compose himself. Harry smiled gently at him, choosing to stay in Severus’ lap. Severus felt it was acceptable that morning, it seemed to be the only way Harry would feel comfortable enough to deal with all the attention.

They turned to the rest of the room and Severus gave them all a nod. 

Miri babbled away in Remus’ arms, her green eyes darting around at all the people, and she kept making an attempt to get to the bright packages on the table without success. Remus sipped his water and considered his own feelings as Harry chose to eat his breakfast before opening his gifts. He had been angry about Severus caring for Harry when he was first rescued, his inner wolf protesting wildly at the notion of someone else caring for his cub. And then the punch that Sirius had landed on Severus the morning after That Night. Remus couldn’t in all honesty say that he had acted well either. He could have stopped Sirius, he was faster and stronger than him, his senses were sharper, but he had chosen to allow Sirius to hit the Potions Master. His wolf flaring again.

Over the months, Remus had felt left out, abandoned, betrayed, angry, unsure, conflicted and possessive. But now he was feeling something else, something he hadn’t been able to give a name to before now.

Acceptance.

He finally accepted the situation, accepted Harry and Severus together. He, at long last, fully accepted that Severus was one of his pack, that Miri was. He found it was quite a nice feeling really, almost soothing. His wolf was calmer, at least. That was better than having it growling at him all the time. Now, if he could only get rid of the nausea, fatigue, short temper and sore abdomen, he would be absolutely peachy. His appointment with his healer was tomorrow morning, he just hoped he managed to keep his slice of birthday cake down later.

He returned his attentions to his cub as he finished his breakfast and took in a deep breath, staring at the huge pile, Severus whispering something to him that made him giggle.

“That one is from me and Remus, Harry,” Sirius said as Harry reached for the small box on top of the enormous stack. Harry opened it to find a gold wizarding wristwatch. “It is traditional for a wizard to receive a watch on his seventeenth. That one was your dads.”

Harry grinned and stood up, making his way around the table to hug the two men, muttering his thanks. He let Sirius fasten it around his wrist before he attacked the next gift. It took him quite a while to get through them all.

As well as the wristwatch, Harry received a huge box of Weasley Wizard Wheezes from Fred and George. They had also slipped some cherry flavoured lube into the box, which made Harry and Severus blush and bury it under some Skiving Snackboxes. Harry planned to thank the twins, somehow, when they arrived later.

From Ron and Hermione, he got a large selection of Honeydukes sweets and a muggle novel about a young woman who had been cursed with constant obedience. Harry found the strawberry fudge went quite well with his breakfast, even if Severus muttered about rotting his teeth.

Arthur and Molly gave him a Weasley jumper, seeing as he had forgotten his and it had been incinerated in the blaze of Spinners End, and a set of Quidditch balls, which must have cost them a fortune, but Arthur revealed that he had finally been promoted, so they had some extra money. Ron, Hermione and Ginny promised to break them in with him at the first opportunity they got. It would probably be a while, as Harry and the married Weasley’s had children that needed their attention.

Charlie gave him a set of dragon figurines that moved. It was like a mini dragon zoo. Harry thoroughly enjoyed watching the little Horntail chase the Swedish Shortsnout across the table. Ginny had included the little farm set to go with them and Harry couldn’t stop arranging the little dragons in their pens, though they kept escaping. How, he didn’t know, but they put up a fight when returned to their pens. It was funny, the tiny dragons trying to prove how tough they were, when all it did was make them look cuter.

Phoenix gave him a gift certificate to Florean Fortescues. Severus promised to take Harry one day soon, and Harry began to plan what he was going to order.

Severus gave him yet more gifts, as did Sirius and Remus. These ranged from a pram for Miri to a full set of new text books and potions equipment for his N.E.W.T.’s, an expensive set of quills and inks to a new journal. There was jewellery, a new broomstick maintenance set, books, clothes, things for Miri, sweets, and all manner of other things. 

Miri thoroughly enjoyed the bright paper Sirius waved in front of her, flourishing it so it caught the light. She kept making grabs for it, trying to eat it.

Harry had thought he was done with all the gifts, until Bill and Solarin announced that theirs wasn’t ready yet and they would pick it up later. He had just begun to relax once more, when Tonks arrived with the twins, who grinned at his renewed blush. Tonks gave him a book on spells that changed a persons appearance. Mad-Eye and Dumbledore followed the three soon after, Mad-Eye giving him a new Sneakoscope. Dumbledore gave him a huge bag of Sherbet Lemons, a lion shaped gold pendant and a pair of socks, made by Dobby the house elf. Then Hedwig arrived with Hagrid’s gift of a new perch for Hedwig and Dumbledore announced that Harry’s fans had sent gifts for him to Hogwarts. Dumbledore assured him that he would sort through them, so he didn’t end up with two of anything, and find good homes for the excess. Harry couldn’t quite get his face to stop burning, and couldn’t dispel the urge to bolt from the room. 

The only thing that helped was Severus. Every time Harry thought he might get up and walk out, having had enough, Severus would lean in and whisper ‘jailbait’ in his ear and Harry would laugh, able to endure all the attention for a little longer.

Harry tore his attention away from the tiny Chinese Fireball trying to catch its own tail to the owl that had just swooped in for him. It looked official, as if it had come from a post office. Harry removed the small box and thanked the owl with a piece of bacon. It was probably from Seamus and Dean, or maybe some member of Dumbledore’s Army. It was a rather small box, so he had no clue as to what it could possibly be.

He opened the box and his chest constricted, stopping the flow of air. His head started to spin, his heart pounded and he felt himself break out in a cold sweat. He stood shakily from the table and backed up, everyone watching him worriedly. He felt himself back into someone and flinched, fighting against the hands that had come up to steady him. 

Severus looked up from his conversation with Moody to see Harry backing away from the table, fighting to breathe. Harry backed into Arthur and began to fight against him, panicking. What on earth was going on, Harry didn’t panic anymore. He hadn’t done so in weeks, months, not since Miri had arrived. And why was Harry rubbing at his wrists?

Severus was there in an instant, but Harry fought against him, too far gone in his panic to register who it was that was touching him. Severus moved back to the table, grabbing the box. 

Lying inside were the manacles Lucius had used to restrain Harry and a note in his cursive scroll.

‘I’ll be seeing you, my little legend. Happy birthday.’

He quelled his own rising anger and passed the box to Sirius, muttering an explanation of what the manacles were used for, and the Animagus paled before he explained to the rest of the family. Severus crossed to his panicking husband, who had backed himself into the corner nearest the stove. He was curled up in a ball on the floor, hugging his knees. He was shaking, tears pouring from his terrified green eyes. Harry had not had a panic attack like this in months, not since Solarin had taken Lucius on in Enchantment. Harry had stopped having fits of terror like this. Damn Lucius.

“Harry? Harry, love, it’s Severus,” he said softly, Harry’s attention caught by his lovers name.

“Severus?” Harry gasped out, though he couldn‘t actually see him through his tears.

“Yes, love. It’s me. Come on, come and cuddle.”

Harry reached out a shaking hand and grabbed the front of Severus’ shirt, curling his fingers in the fabric. Slowly, Severus eased him out of his corner and pulled him into his arms, carrying him to the table and rocking him, breathing slow and deep so Harry would copy him.

“Why?” Harry whispered.

“To induce this panic, to ruin your day,” Severus said simply, stroking the dark hair.

“Bastard.”

“Yes, he is.” Severus turned to Dumbledore. “We need to stop this. That man has figured out a way to get to Harry, even if he can’t actually find him. We need to stop anonymous owls coming here.”

Dumbledore nodded, Moody mentioning that he would speak to the Auror’s about their search for the blond aristocrat. 

Severus looked at Remus. “Harry opens no more post. Someone else opens it for him, I don’t care who, but someone else opens it before he reads it,” he instructed and Remus nodded.

Harry curled into Severus’ embrace, clutching at his shirt. Severus was holding him, rocking him, whispering soothing words in his ear between orders to other people, breathing slow and deep. Harry knew what he was trying to do, but it wasn’t working. Harry pulled back and latched his lips onto Severus’, his husband responding immediately. The kiss was everything he needed. It was soft and gentle, and yet it was deep and possessive. He was Severus’, always Severus’. He could breathe again, his heart had slowed. He felt rather proud of how well he had managed to make it go away this time.

“Lucius can’t have me,” Harry said angrily, his panic fading. “I’m yours, I belong to you. He can’t have me, you won’t let him.”

“Exactly, Harry. I will never let him take you from me. You are mine, always mine,” Severus agreed, impressed that Harry had regained his calm so quickly. There were no odd unconnected statements or questions this time. Quite the improvement.

Harry took a deep breath and glanced around the room, searching for his baby. She was safe in Remus’ arms, happily sucking on her thumb, a piece of shiny yellow ribbon in her free fist. She was safe, Remus wouldn’t let anything happen to her. Remus wouldn’t let anyone but Harry take her from him, Miri was safe.

“Give me the box,” Harry demanded, placing a hand over Severus’ mouth when he started to protest. “I’m all right. I need to do this. Give me the box.”

Harry wasn’t quite sure why he wanted to see it, but he knew he needed to. He couldn’t figure out why, but he was determined. Severus had taught him to follow his instincts.

Sirius cautiously handed the box to him and Harry put it on the table. He reached inside and picked up the note, running his fingers over the neat writing. 

“I am a legend, but I’m not his,” Harry said firmly. “Sol, will you incinerate this for me?”

She nodded and conjured a bright blue flame in the palm of her hand, holding it out so he could feed the parchment into it. It blazed in an instant and Harry felt himself smile.

He reached for the manacles. He was surprised by the weight, he had forgotten how heavy they were. He glanced at the scars on his wrists, scars Lucius had caused with these restraints. The chain between the two circles of metal was thick, and there was a piece of brick attached to part of it. Lucius had probably ripped it off the wall when he discovered he was missing. Harry ran his fingers over the cold iron of the cuffs. The outside was rather smooth, but the inside was rough. Harry tilted it to get a better look and found that there were serrated ridges along the inside. Lucius had purposely chosen them to cause Harry pain, to cause the scars. Harry turned them over and over in his hands, looking at them from every angle. The room was silent and still, the whole family watching him.

“These are the restraints that Lucius used to keep me his prisoner,” Harry announced to the room, his voice calm and steady. “It took Draco an hour to figure out that they were magically sealed, even though he used his bare hands to try and yank them open, and it took Severus so many spells to break them, I thought he would run out of ideas. I wore these for almost five months straight while he tortured me, and he raped me, and he tried to break me.” He stroked the thick chain. “But I’m safe now. I’m home. Lucius is just a sick pathetic sadistic son of a bitch, and he is no more than a child playing games with me.” 

He looked up to see everyone looking proudly at him. “Mad-Eye, when you catch him, can you make sure that he wears these?” Harry asked, passing him the shackles. Moody nodded and Harry fixed his attention on his parents. “Is it too late for me to have a party tonight?”

Remus and Sirius glanced at each other in surprise. “I don’t know, pup,” Remus said. 

“I will arrange for Harry’s friends from school to come tonight,” Albus offered. “Give me a list of the guests you want, Harry, and I will contact them for you.”

“Molly’s cooked enough to feed an army,” Arthur put in. “There is enough food to feed all of Gryffindor tower.”

“I can supply the entertainment, provided I can be let loose on all those unused musical instruments in the attic,” Solarin said, and then her gaze fixed on Bill. “Would you and your wonderful brothers play them for me?” She was toying with his hair, running her fingertips along his neck and Harry realized that he didn’t stand a chance against her. Bill nodded and she kissed him in thanks, the curse breaker having to excuse himself from the room. Solarin grinned. “Music sorted.” Severus shuddered as they all realized she had been whispering naughty somethings into his head through the connection.

“We can deal with the decorations,” Fred said firmly, George nodding.

Harry smiled at them. “I want to celebrate today. I have a lot to celebrate, and I want to do it in style,” Harry said firmly and they all smiled at him. He turned to look at Severus. “I think I’d like to lie down first though, I feel a little lightheaded.”

Remus assured them that Miri would be fine with him for an hour or two, and Severus led him from the room, up to their bedroom, lying with him and holding him safe in his warm arms. 

“Tell me again,” Harry whispered.

“You are mine, and I refuse to give you up. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. Even if I do not deserve you, or the happiness you bring me, I will not let anyone take you from me. Especially Lucius,” Severus said firmly.

Harry smiled, sighing in contentment.

“You are mine,” Severus said possessively.

“I am yours.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Solarin slipped into the living room, finding the redhead she was searching for. 

“Arthur, I wonder if you could charm this to work without electricity,” she said, setting the heavy box she carried on the floor.

Arthur glanced up from the piano he was retuning to peer at the strange picture on the packaging. 

Arthur hadn’t been able to give his children very much in the way of money or possessions when they were young, but he had taught them all to play a musical instrument of their choosing. It was something he felt was important, for his sons and daughter to appreciate the beauty of music. It was an education that they would never receive at Hogwarts, and it was best learned young. Arthur’s father had taught him the piano and the violin, he felt music to be an appropriate family tradition. Bill and Percy played the piano, Charlie and Ron the guitar, Fred and George the drums, and Ginny the violin. It was quite the sound to behold when they all got together to play.

“What is it?” he asked, tilting the box to get a better look.

“It is a muggle karaoke machine. It plays muggle music that you can sing along with, it has a screen so you can see the words. I thought Harry might enjoy having muggle music at his party and I just know that you are the wizard with the know how to make it work,” she said, Arthur’s eyes lighting up at the word ‘muggle’.

“Don’t tell Molly,” he said, reaching for the box excitedly. He pulled out his muggle tools from his back pocket. He had taken to carrying them around with him, eager for any muggle paraphernalia that he might have the chance to dismantle.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.”

She settled in an armchair to watch him work, marvelling at his skill with it. They were all well aware that Molly didn’t like her husband tinkering with muggle devices, but Solarin loved it. There were many great things in the Muggle World, it seemed a shame to her that wizards could not enjoy them. She grinned at Arthur’s expression of sheer delight as he pulled out a microphone. She rather liked Arthur, he was a good man and smiled an awful lot. She found his obsession with muggles quite endearing.

“I know that your boys will be playing tonight but I thought it might be a nice addition. I got it while I was out getting Harry’s gift. Think I can convince Charlie to sing with me?” she asked as he started to dismantle the plug.

“Oh, I think you’ll manage it,” he said, glancing up at her. “I think you could even convince Bill to get over his stage fright.”

Arthur had always liked the strange little witch, ever since Bill had brought her to the Burrow one summer and she had proudly announced that she was half-blood when questioned. Arthur had spent that day restraining himself from monopolising her attentions, his brain buzzing with questions. Since they had all begun living in the same house, Solarin had patiently answered all of his questions, offering a few nuggets of information he hadn’t even considered.

She was a good match for his son, a perfect one, in his opinion. She managed to bring out a different side of him, a sweet, playful side that Arthur quite enjoyed. Bill had been so serious and quiet for the last few years, the years she had not been with him. There was a new fire in his son, and he knew that the augur was responsible. They seemed to be the golden couple. There was just one question Arthur had.

“Why have you and Bill never married?” he asked suddenly and her jaw dropped. 

She took a few minutes to compose herself and then answered. “I love Bill, very much, but I have a thing about marriage. Severus has always said it would take a dragon on my tail to get me down the aisle. The idea of marriage makes me nervous. I didn’t even go to Severus and Harry’s wedding,” she revealed.

“Why?”

“My parents were married. I guess their idea of marriage has always stuck with me. I know that Bill would never hurt me, if anything he would forever treat me to roses and chocolates. But I’ve never really got my head around the whole idea.” She smiled at him. “Maybe one day I will marry your son, but not anytime soon. Maybe someday.”

He nodded and let the subject drop. He giggled at the fuse he had uncovered in the plug. Maybe he could start a new collection of them. There were plenty of places in Number Twelve he could hide it from Molly. His head snapped up as Solarin sat down at the piano and began to play Beethoven, tuning it as she went.

He smiled. Yes, she was the perfect witch for his son.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

The family sat down to a quiet dinner at five that evening, and Harry found himself presented with Solarin and Bill’s gift. He set down his knife and fork and pulled off the shiny blue wrapping paper, Miri making a grab for it from where she was cradled in Severus’ arms. Severus picked up the paper and twirled it, making Miri giggle.

Inside the paper was a photograph in a black wooden frame. It brought tears to his eyes.

In the photo was him and Severus and Miri, but there was Remus and Sirius too. There was Phoenix, the Weasley’s, Solarin, Tonks, Dumbledore, Moody. 

And his parents.

It was a photograph of his whole family, all interacting with each other as if the photo had been taken that morning. But it could not have possibly been taken.

“How did you do this?” Harry whispered, running his fingers over the image of his parents, his mother proudly tickling Miri.

“I have a friend who has combined muggle photo manipulation technology with magic. She took a load of photos of the people in your family and combined them. Then she charmed them to move and interact with each other,” Solarin explained. “You asked for your parents for your birthday. It was the closest I could get. Do you like it?”

“You two are so alike,” Harry said to Severus and Solarin. “I love it. Thank you.”

He hugged her firmly and set the picture in the middle of the table, in pride of place. His whole family was in it. It was perfect.

The rest of the meal was calm and quiet, the family talking about anything that happened to come to mind. At the end of it, Molly brought out his cake, which was in the form of a huge beach ball sized Snitch. Under the golden icing, Harry found the cake to be chocolate.

In Harry’s opinion, his birthday had been pretty much perfect, barring the ‘gift’ from Lucius. It was such a shame, in Harry’s view, that Remus hadn’t managed to keep his slice of cake down.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Severus watched his lover from across the garden, the sprite smiling and laughing with his friends. Harry was surrounded by them. Seamus and Dean, who had joined hands constantly; Luna and Neville, who seemed to be dating, though no one could be quite sure about that one; the little Creevy brothers, who each had a camera dangling from their necks; Ron and Hermione, holding a twin each; Lavender, who kept making eyes at Ron, and Parvati, who was staring enviously at Phoenix’ long blonde hair. 

Harry had opted to only have a few of his friends at his party, not wanting to test himself too much by having too many people. Severus suspected that Lavender and Parvati were just invited so Harry could add to the numbers, push his boundaries slightly. The girls made Severus shudder and Ron and Hermione didn’t seem to be appreciating their presence either. But, it was Harry’s party, so they all kept their mouths closed.

‘Merlin, Harry is beautiful tonight’, Severus thought to himself. Harry was dressed in a tailored sea green shirt, the colour bringing out his eyes, and tight fitting black jeans. He was definitely looking good tonight. He had regained his slim figure almost immediately after delivering Miri. Ah, the joys of being young. But it wasn’t his body, it was his smile that caused Severus’ admiration. His little elfin beauty was breathtaking when he laughed, and he seemed to be doing quite a lot of it tonight. 

The sun was just beginning to set and the party would soon get underway, if Solarin could ever get the music set up. Miri was falling asleep in Severus’ arms, the tiny girl still clutching the shiny blue paper from Harry’s photograph, sucking the thumb of her free hand, rubbing her nose with her free fingers. She was fighting it, too much going on for her to want to miss any of it, but Severus knew it was a losing battle. The baby augur had managed to stay awake all day, though he was baffled as to how, and now she was exhausted. She was fed, dry and happy. Her chances of lasting another five minutes were slim to none.

Severus let his eyes rake over the whole garden, taking in the odd pairings and unusual groupings.

Fred and George were standing with Tonks, the three of them talking animatedly with Minerva McGonagall, the old witch laughing. Three pranksters and a teacher, wonders would never cease.

On the conjured stage, Bill and Charlie were setting up instruments, Solarin and Arthur fiddling with an odd muggle looking square thing while Molly berated the two of them for bewitching it. Bill and Charlie were trying to hide sniggers of amusement at the guilty looks on Arthur and Solarin’s faces.

Dumbledore and Pomona Sprout were discussing Quidditch with Phoenix and Ginny, the blonde witch smiling at the descriptions of the last Slytherin game that she had missed.

Sirius and Remus were in deep discussion with Filius Flitwick and Moody, Remus looking ill but still smiling, Sirius keeping a close eye on his husband. The discussion seemed to be on household charms, but Severus couldn’t see the point as neither Sirius nor Remus performed many of those.

Severus himself was in discussion with Hagrid and Horace Slughorn, his replacement as Potions Master at Hogwarts and his old head of house. The two men were admiring Miri, proclaiming what an adorable little witch she was, and Severus hid his smirk. One little baby girl and grown men went to pieces. He dreaded to think of how much of a heartbreaker she would be at sixteen. 

“She is adorable, isn’t she?” asked Harry, coming over to the three men and a baby.

“Absolutely, Harry. She’s the spit of you,” Hagrid proclaimed and Harry grinned.

“Thank you. I should go and put her to bed,” Harry said, Severus easing the slumbering girl to her carriers arms and kissing Harry on the cheek. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

He slipped into the house and up to Miri’s nursery, slipping her into her crib and adjusting the window so she had a cool breeze fluttering over her. He stroked her hair, plucked the wrapping paper from her tiny fist, and grabbed the baby monitor, turning it on. He slipped into his bedroom and grabbed the other one, activating it and clipping it to his belt. It wouldn’t do to miss her whimpers through the noise of the party. 

He cast a silencing spell on the nursery before he slipped from it once more, grinning at the sound of music that drifted up to him. He stole back into the garden, watching it for a moment before anyone noticed him. 

The joys of living in a magical house was that things were never really what they appeared to be. Number Twelve appeared to be no bigger than Number Eleven or Number Thirteen, but that was deceiving. Outside, the house appeared just like all the others in the street. Inside was a different story. There were masses of rooms, dozens of bedrooms, many bathrooms, and a very large garden. The garden was roughly the size of a field, and Harry considered it to be near the size of the Quidditch pitch at Hogwarts, but he was appalling at judging things like size, so he didn’t consider his assessment to be accurate. Either way, it was big enough for Hagrid to have attended without breaking anything.

Fred and George had hung hundreds of lime green lanterns and scarlet balloons over the space, hovering above them all, casting a warm glow. Molly and Arthur had managed to turn the bombsite that used to be the garden into a paradise, full of beautiful flowers, a full green lawn and even a huge oak tree at the end, the leaves of which Hermione had charmed gold. Solarin had dragged Charlie into singing with her up on the conjured stage, and Harry found that the dragon tamer was actually very good. The music was a mix of wizarding songs, which were played by the Weasley boys, and muggle tunes, which came from the karaoke machine. Some of them Harry knew, most he didn’t, but he enjoyed it all the same. Harry’s friends and family were gathered here and he smiled. He had expected to panic at the increased numbers, but he was very calm. He was safe, surrounded by people who loved and cared for him. And Severus was with him. It was all he needed.

“Harry, are you all right?” Ginny asked as she carried out a tray of drinks for everyone, placing them on the table by the door.

“I’m fine. Just thinking,” he said.

“Are you having a good time?” she asked as she handed him a drink.

“I’m having a great time.”

“Come on, Harry! Come dance!” Neville called as Ron and Hermione slipped past him to put Catherine and Joseph into their cribs. Harry smiled and made his way over, letting Seamus and Dean pull him into the group of friends madly jumping around to the beat of the music.

The next hour passed in a haze of music and laughter as he danced with his friends, even relaxing enough to let Dean hold him as they danced to a slower number. Seamus had chuckled, wagging a teasing warning finger at Harry and claiming he wanted his boyfriend back at the end of the night with his virtue intact. Harry had replied ‘What virtue? You took that already’. His friends had dissolved into shocked laughter. Dean had chuckled in Harry’s ear, wrapping his arms around his waist from where he stood behind him, the two of them swaying to the music. Harry could see Severus watching them like a hawk and he smiled, waving at his husband, Dean paling slightly and determinedly keeping his hands solely on Harry’s waist. 

Seamus and Neville were debating, as they danced together, on whether or not Harry would be considered a gay wizard or a straight one. They had looked to Harry for his comfort of them talking about this and he had waved away their concerns, telling them to go right ahead, it might help him to figure it out himself. 

Neville mused that Harry’s female anatomy made him straight. It was a fair point, considering that Harry had been pregnant not so very long ago.

Lavender reasoned that Harry was both male and female, so either everyone was the same gender as he was or no one was, so he would be considered straight. That one didn’t make sense to anyone, not even Harry. 

Maybe it had been a bad idea to invite Lavender? She kept trying to get Ron to let go of Hermione and dance with her. Hermione kept a death grip on her husband and he didn’t complain, clutching at her just as tightly. After Lavender’s fifth attempt, Sirius came over and rescued the young Weasley couple by asking Lavender to dance, Remus sitting on the edge of the stage, surveying the gathered teens with a wicked wolfish grin. Sirius had used his full Pureblood charm on her and she had melted, letting him lead her away. As they left, Sirius added that he considered Harry to be in love, and did it count as a preference. Harry beamed at his winking godfather.

Seamus argued that Harry considered himself male, so he was gay, and proclaimed that he had always known Harry batted for his team. Everyone rolled their eyes at this.

Neither Neville nor Seamus wanted to relent, and they managed to twist themselves around so much that neither argument made sense anymore, but they did end up in a fit of laughter, so it was a good conversation.

Harry was about to comment that he liked Sirius’ suggestion when Bill came rushing up to him, shielding himself behind Harry and Dean, though they didn’t make very good cover for the much taller wizard.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked.

“Hiding from your sister-in-law. That witch is nuts,” Bill said, crouching down.

“Why are you hiding?” Dean asked, chuckling as Bill grabbed the back of his shirt and maneuvered the two younger Gryffindor’s to shield him from the augur moving towards him. Tonks had taken over Solarin’s place on the stage and Harry considered the pink haired witch to be a better Auror than singer, but he gave her points for trying.

“She wants me to get up there and sing with her. I’ve told her a million times, I don’t get up on a bloody stage,” Bill said, his voice rising as Solarin stopped in front of Harry, grinning. She folded her arms over her chest and tapped her foot, leaning to the left so she could peer at her boyfriend.

“William Weasley, it is so cowardly of you to hide behind children,” she scolded, winking at Harry and Dean.

Dean was making faint spluttering noises in Harry’s ear and Harry smirked. Dean was bisexual, of course the beautiful curvy woman in the little black dress would catch his attention, even if his long term boyfriend was within arms reach.

“Harry is legal now, he’s not a child,” Bill argued.

“No, but Dean is, aren’t you, Dean?” she said, pulling Harry away from the staring Gryffindor, removing one of Bill’s shields.

“Nope, he’s all man, a legal man,” said Seamus, grinning from Harry’s left. Seamus leaned into Harry. “I bet you ten sickles he faints before she moves away,” Seamus whispered in his ear, making Harry laugh and disagree. Harry bet that Dean would make a pass at her.

Solarin moved closer to the two males, smiling at Dean. “Well, I suppose if you’re not man enough to get up there, I’ll just have to amuse myself with your little friend,” she said, wrapping her arms around Dean’s neck, who seemed to be unable to breathe, though he did slide his hand down as if to cup her backside. Something her next comment put a stop to. “After all, he is much more manly than you.”

It did the trick, as Bill popped up and grabbed her hand, pulling her away from Dean and kissing her possessively. “Slytherin,” Bill muttered.

“You love it.”

Harry burst out laughing as Dean blinked in surprise, Seamus handing Harry his winnings and moving to console his boyfriend. 

Harry had the suspicion that the Irishman and his lover were not entirely exclusive. Harry considered it a scary thought, the two of them unleashed on the unsuspecting magical population, gay, straight, and any variation in-between. Harry was suddenly very thankful for Severus’ clear possessiveness. He wasn’t sure he would handle being hit on by his friends very well. He didn’t have to worry about it though; Severus had made it very clear that he did not share.

“That is not fair, you manipulated me,” Bill complained.

“Well, you are very easy to manipulate,” Solarin teased, smiling.

“You know, sometimes, you are too much of a Slytherin for your own good.”

“I think Harry could out Slytherin her any day,” Severus said, coming up to the group, making Neville jump about a foot in the air.

Harry grinned and allowed Severus to pull him possessively into his hold. Harry choked back his laughter as his friends eyes nearly popped out of their heads. He had forgotten that Dean, Seamus, the Creevy’s, Parvati and Lavender had never seen him and Severus together. 

Sirius had abandoned Lavender, returning to Remus. Sirius seemed mortified and Remus was consoling him. Remus was glaring at Lavender, running his hands along Sirius’ back and chest, kissing him desperately every few moments. He was remarking his territory while soothing his husband and Harry realized that Lavender had made a pass at his married gay godfather. Poor Sirius. Then again, poor Lavender if Remus got hold of her.

Solarin grinned. “Come on, Bill. It’s just one song and I’ll be right up there with you,” she pleaded and Harry could see his resolve wavering.

“Please, don’t make me get up on that stage,” he begged.

“But you have a wonderful voice. Come on, it’s Harry’s birthday. Consider it a gift to him.”

“We already gave him a gift.”

She sighed and tilted her head to the side, surveying him with a calculating gaze and sweeping her hair away from her neck, stroking her own hand down the smooth pale column. He looked very nervous.

“I’ll make it worth your while…” she teased, her gaze seductive.

Severus shuddered and Dean looked put out, but Bill sighed, nodding. “You owe me big for this one,” Bill said, letting her grab his hand and pull him towards the stage.

Severus led Harry away from his friends, pulling him in to wrap his arms around him, laying his hands on the base of Harry’s spine.

“Dance with me, love,” Severus said, kissing his neck. Harry smiled and nodded, resting his hands on the strong shoulders. Severus chuckled at the terrified looks from Dean and Seamus. Severus would not be sharing his petite companion. With anyone.

Bill and Solarin took a microphone each, Solarin starting off the slow romantic muggle duet, and Severus began to sway with his lover, Harry resting his head against his chest. Solarin had been right, Bill was good and their voices worked well together.

“Are you enjoying your party?” Severus asked, Harry pulling back to look at him, his smile wide.

“Yes. I didn’t think I would, not with this many people here, but I really am enjoying myself,” Harry said, laughing as Severus spun him. “Seamus made an interesting suggestion earlier.”

Severus kissed the dark messy hair. “What suggestion?”

“He suggested I go to Hogwarts to play in the Quidditch matches. I’m not going back for lessons, I couldn’t handle that and Miri needs me here, but I could still play. I am still a Gryffindor, and I am still a member of the team,” Harry explained, Severus considering the idea.

“Would you be comfortable with it? The stands would be full of people. Are you sure you want to?” 

“I think so, I’ll be in the air, away from all the crowds, and I know you won’t let me go without you, so you’ll be right there with me. Seamus says that the first Gryffindor game is against Hufflepuff. It’s a nice easy game, more fun than actual competition. They lost all their competition when…when Cedric was killed,” Harry reasoned, glossing over the death of Cedric Diggory. It was his birthday, he didn’t want to dwell on the losses of his past.

Severus swooped in and kissed him, soft and sweet. “I will talk to Albus, see if it is permissible for you to still play,” Severus agreed and Harry bestowed him with a huge smile, pulling him into a passionate kiss.

“I love you, did you know that?” Harry asked as he pulled back.

Severus chuckled. “Yes, I knew that. I love you too.”

Harry smiled and let his husband lead him around, the two of them losing themselves in their own little world.

The night went on like that, Severus letting Harry go to dance with others before letting his possessive streak overtake once more, pulling Harry back to him for a song or two. It was a good system. It let Harry keep his cool with so many people and allowed Severus to be overprotective without it being too obvious.

At one point, Sirius brought out a few bottles of champagne. This was no ordinary muggle champagne, this was wizards champagne. As you popped off the cork, it turned into a little dancing leprechaun, something Seamus greatly enjoyed. The drink itself changed colour according to the inebriation of the drinker, and let off glimmering bubbles as it was poured. Sirius, Arthur, the Twins, Seamus, Dean, Ron, and Charlie ended up with bright green glasses of alcohol, their consumption the highest. They would have very sore heads in the morning. Severus had a few glasses, his glass only reaching a warm orange. Harry had a sip of Severus’, not considering it a good idea to drink properly whilst he was still nursing Miri, even if he did like the way the bubbles tickled. Severus’ glass turned red as Harry held it, indicating total sobriety.

Harry stuck to soft drinks, along with Hermione, Remus, Molly, Bill, and Solarin, though the augur did seem awfully merry. The other guests had varying amounts of champagne, each of them thoroughly enjoying Harry’s party.

Oh dear, maybe it had not been the best idea to let Lavender drink. She had moved on from Ron and was making a pass for Bill. Solarin could barely contain her laughter at his futile attempts to save himself, and she finally took pity on him, moving over to bail him out. Bill cast a wary glance at Lavender as he led Solarin away, clutching her like a security blanket. Lavender went on to make a move on Charlie, something Phoenix soon put an end to. Eventually, Sirius put an end to it all as she fixed her eye on Harry and Lavender was collected by her parents, the two of them scolding her all the way to the floo.

No one seemed to miss her, or Parvati who left soon after her friend.

It was past midnight and the party was still in full swing when it all went a bit pear shaped. 

Harry sat down with Remus, the two of them watching Severus and Sirius trying to beat each other at some game involving downing shots of something green. 

“They are going to be so ill in the morning,” Harry commented and Remus grinned.

“I say we wake them up at the crack of dawn,” Remus suggested. “It would serve them right. Maybe it’ll teach them to stop trying to outdo each other.”

“I like it. Maybe we should hide the hangover potions, too.” 

Remus stared at his cub and then let out a bark of laughter. “Severus is right, you are a little Slytherin in Gryffindor skin,” he sniggered, Harry smiling. “I like it, worthy of the Marauders. It’ll teach them.”

Charlie took over the music, Solarin moving through the milling people to grab a fresh drink and then to observe the two men making fools of themselves. She had a very mischievous smirk on her face and Harry ran his wand over his drink just to be sure it was still pineapple juice. Tonks had told him that it was a given circumstance for the Odd Trio to switch peoples drinks.

Their two spouses continued to try and win, years of petty rivalry taking over their common sense at that particular moment. Seamus was pouring, Dean keeping score and Solarin came over from watching the contest to discreetly whisper that the booze in the bottle was fake. It had no alcoholic content at all, it just tasted that way. Solarin, Bill and Tonks had thought it wise to make the switch. Harry laughed. Still pranksters. He and Remus mused on who would be more upset to discover the deception, the Animagus or the Potions Master?

“I’m going for another drink, do you want one?” Remus asked. Harry shook his head and Remus got to his feet, suddenly feeling the garden spin.

“Remus?” Harry asked, standing up to grab the werewolf’s arm as he swayed on his feet. “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine, I just stood up too fast,” Remus said, smiling at him. He made to walk away, but didn’t get very far.

Harry never managed to say anything else as Remus collapsed before he got the chance.

“Sirius!” Harry screamed, ending the game.

Sirius spun around to find Remus on the floor, Harry cradling his head in his lap. He bolted over, skidding to his knees as he reached his lover. The party ground to a halt, the music cutting out immediately. Everyone peered over concernedly, a few people moving closer to Remus.

“What happened?” Sirius asked his godson, checking Remus’ pulse and finding it strong and steady. No fever, no trouble breathing. Remus seemed fine, just unconscious. 

“I don’t know. He said he was going for another drink and then he stood up, but he looked like he was about to fall over. He said he stood up too fast, and then he just went down, no warning or anything,” Harry described, Severus kissing his temple to keep him calm.

“Remus? Remus, can you hear me?” Sirius asked, stroking his hair, trying to rouse the man. “Remus, come on, honey, wake up for me.”

Remus groaned and opened his eyes, staring up at the bright crescent moon and scattering of stars. He glanced around, finding green eyes, blue eyes and black eyes staring down on him worriedly. “Ugh, what happened? Why am I on the grass?” he asked groggily.

“You passed out. How do you feel?” Severus asked as Sirius helped Remus sit up, leaning him against his chest.

“Fine, I think. It was all very dizzy all of a sudden,” Remus said, Sirius stroking his hair. “I’m all right.”

“You fainted,” Sirius argued, helping Remus into a chair.

“Please, can we make it sound more manly than that?” Remus begged and Severus smirked.

“Fine, passed out, collapsed, blacked out, whatever. Point is, you ended up unconscious. I’m taking you to see a healer right now,” Sirius commanded.

“Sirius, come on,” Remus complained. “It can wait until morning. My appointment is tomorrow anyway. I feel fine now. I promise I will sit here like a good boy, just let me have tonight before you have that bloody man start poking and prodding me. Leave it until the morning, Padfoot.”

“Remus…”

“No. I want to stay for the rest of Harry’s party, it’s his seventeenth. Whatever this is, it has been going on for weeks, months. It will still be there in the morning. Leave me be for tonight and tomorrow, I will go to my healer and you can fuss all you like. Please, Siri?” Remus persuaded.

“Are you sure you feel all right?” Sirius asked. 

“I feel fine now,” Remus insisted.

“Have you managed to eat anything since you lost your dinner?”

“No, I haven’t eaten anything. That’s probably why I collapsed.” 

Harry made to stand up to get Remus something to eat when Solarin stepped into the group, holding a plate of party nibbles.

“Here, eat this. It’s all plain, it should stay down,” she said, handing him the plate and a glass of water. He smiled at her and accepted it, beginning to eat at Sirius commanding gaze. Harry realized that there was another woman standing beside Solarin. She had dyed red hair and three spikes through her lower lip. There were also about a dozen hoops through her right ear, her left hidden by her hair.

“Who is your friend, Sol?” Remus asked, trying to move the attention away from his poor health.

“This is Maab. She is one of the other witches who sings regularly at Enchantment. I had Albus get her for me, to take over. My throat is raw, I can’t keep it up on that stage much longer, so she’s going to entertain us,” Solarin explained and Maab nodded a greeting to all of them, her hazel eyes lingering for a moment on Harry’s scar before she excused herself and moved to the stage.

“Are you sure you’re all right?” Sirius asked, undeterred.

“I am fine. I am going to sit here and enjoy the party,” Remus insisted. “Stop fussing, Padfoot.”

Sirius huffed in annoyance but he let it be. At Remus’ gentle persuading he moved away, Arthur engaging him in discussion of his flying motorbike. Remus convinced them all to continue with the party and they all eventually agreed, though Neville and Luna opted to sit with Remus and talk weird magical creatures, the lycanthrope laughing at some of Luna’s more bizarre animal descriptions.

Maab was not as good as Solarin, her voice was a little thin, but she was good enough. She kept up with the muggle music and Solarin revealed to them all that Maab was Muggleborn, something that made Hermione smile. 

The night was perfect, Seamus even managing to get Sirius to dance with him. He had been angling for a turn around the dance floor with the tall, willowy, gorgeous Pureblood all night, but he had been too embarrassed to actually ask Sirius for a turn. Remus had finally taken pity on the little wizard and whispered in Sirius’ ear something about the wonders of his allure, pointing at Seamus. Sirius had grinned, kissed his husband and then blasted Seamus with his magnetism, not that it was needed by that point. Harry wasn’t quite sure who had melted faster, Lavender or Seamus. The Irishman had been practically floating on a cloud when Sirius finally released him with a cheeky peck to his cheek. Dean and Remus had just shaken their heads, smiling in amusement. Sirius and his bloody charm. Got them every time. 

The night finally drew to a close at four am, and Harry saw off the last of his guests through the floo before Severus led him to bed.

As Harry drifted off to sleep, safe in Severus’ arms, he smiled. 

‘Best birthday ever.’

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	5. Chapter 5

Remus shifted in his seat, hating the hard plastic of his chair. In fact, he hated the whole room, the whole building, but he couldn’t say that out loud. Not when he was about to be thrown to the lions. Best to act like he was fine with it, not show a weakness. That plan was, of course, not going to work.

“This is ridiculous,” Remus mumbled and Sirius smiled at him.

“You promised, Moony. You promised that if I let you have the rest of the party, I could fuss all I liked. So here I am, fussing all I like. And my fussing includes you seeing your healer,” Sirius said firmly, slipping his hand into Remus’ and rubbing the soft skin with his thumb. 

“I know,” Remus grumbled. “I know I promised. But it hate this. He’s just going to poke and prod and ask obscenely intimate questions about our sex life. I swear, it would be easier just to go to bloody Greyback, at least he’s open about his enjoyment of torturing people.”

Sirius sniggered. “It won’t be that bad. And I will be right there with you.”

“When did you become so flipping sensible? I thought I was supposed to be the calm responsible one and you were the hot head,” Remus asked crabbily.

“When you started getting sick every morning,” Sirius replied easily. He nibbled his lower lip. “You know, believe it or not, I love you. I love you more than anyone else. I have worked too hard to be with you, I’m not about to let some nasty flu strike you down. You mean everything to me. So I’m going to get you the best possible care to make you better again.”

Remus stared at him. It was rare that Sirius was this open about his feelings for Remus, not that Remus wasn’t fully aware of his love, it was just, usually, they expressed themselves in bed. The last time Sirius had been so vocal, Harry had just gotten his name cleared. Harry giving Sirius his freedom had finally allowed the Animagus to enjoy his life with his husband. It had induced Sirius into proclaiming his love and adoration. It was the last time he had said it out loud and that was over a year ago.

This declaration was unexpected, but Remus wasn’t about to question it. 

“I love you too,” Remus said, pulling him in for a kiss. “I suppose I can endure one little examination. But don’t leave me alone with that man.”

“I wouldn’t endanger the good healer,” Sirius said with a grin as the nurse came to collect them.

Remus groaned and allowed Sirius to pull him to his feet, calling him a scared little puppy when he moved at a snail’s pace towards the healers door. But Sirius didn’t let go of his hand, and he leaned in to stroke Remus’ cheek, kissing him gently.

Remus could do this, as long as Sirius was with him.

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Harry gulped down a pepper-up potion, feeling his fatigue dissipate. Miri was cooing happily in his arms and he snorted in amusement. He felt like the crypt keeper and she was all sunshine and smiles. Typical.

But it had been worth it. His birthday had been brilliant. Even if he had only ended up with three hours sleep.

“Where’s Remus?” Charlie asked from the table, shielding his eyes. He wasn’t the only one with a hangover, and Harry had hidden the potions, just like he said he would. He was receiving several glares along with many pleading looks, but he refused to relent. Well, he had relented for Sirius so he could be competent when he went off with Remus. Harry wasn’t that much of a Slytherin.

“Gone to see his healer. He and Sirius left a little while ago,” Severus said as he entered the kitchen carrying a shot glass of bright violet liquid. He leaned in and kissed Harry before he handed him the glass.

“What is it?” Harry asked, holding it away from Miri’s reaching grasp.

“Your contraceptive potion,” Severus replied, plucking Miri from Harry’s hold.

“One shot? I thought there would be more of it.”

Severus smiled and held Miri’s hands as she made a fresh attempt to get to the pretty purple potion. “One shot is enough. It will protect you for six months”

Harry nodded and downed it. It felt like ice hitting his stomach and he gasped, letting out a cloud of frost. He hiccupped and a small snowflake drifted out, melting instantly in the summer air.

“Is it supposed to turn me into Frosty the Snowman?” Harry asked as he gulped down some warm tea from Molly, trying to dispel the chill.

“It is supposed to do that, yes.”

“Good to know,” Harry muttered, the two of them making their way over to the table.

“Please, Harry. Just one,” Charlie begged.

“Nope. You should have restrained yourself,” Harry said cheerfully, Charlie wincing at his volume.

“It was a party,” Arthur put in. “We were only enjoying ourselves. Be a dear and give us the potions.”

“What potions?” Severus asked, holding his bright green coffee cup away from Miri’s questing hands. “I swear this child will be a Seeker just like her carrier. Look at her, not even three months old and she is already trying to get at shiny things.”

“Three months old on the fifth,” Harry stated, making Severus smile. Harry grabbed an apple. “And they’re asking for the hangover potions I’ve hidden.” Severus chuckled.

“Miri only wants them because she’s reading you,” Solarin offered. “You’re thinking that she can’t have your cup, which is why she keeps making grabs for it.”

Surprisingly, Solarin had no hangover. Harry had discovered that she had restrained herself from indulging in inebriated minds too much last night, so all she had was a mild headache. She easily chased it away it with a spell, though she refused to tell Charlie the charm.

Harry swallowed his bite of apple and retrieved his daughter, settling her on his lap. He plucked a plum from the fruit bowl and pulled a sheet of gold wrapping paper from his pocket. He wrapped the plum in it and cast a spell to make it baby proof before he handed it to Miri. It looked like a snitch. She stared at it before she proceeded to chew on it. Well, she tried to at least. All she managed to do was suck at it.

“Why did you ask about Remus?” Harry asked as Miri waved the fake snitch at Severus, the Potions Master smiling through his mouthful of strawberry.

“There’s a letter for him, some publishing house. Sol got one too,” Charlie said, handing Solarin her envelope and shuffling the rest of the morning post.

It was a plain blue packet, and had the Midnight Books name and logo stamped on the top left hand corner. She opened it and scanned the letter before passing it to Severus. Bill, who had read it over her head, kissed her neck, making her smile.

“Well done,” Severus praised after a quick glance at it. He looked up to see everyone staring in question. “Sol has landed herself a publishing contract. A ten book deal.”

“Way to go,” Harry congratulated. “What are you going to write about?”

“Mostly the intricacies of the Muggle World. Albus mentioned that the text books for Muggle Studies were horribly out of date. I was also considering writing a book on augurs. Most of the publications out there are really biased. They seem to have all been written with the sole purpose of making me and my kind out to be homicidal maniacs,” Solarin said brightly. She toyed with one of Miri’s curls. “I think it is high time we had a good book on augurs.”

“Here here,” Severus said, tickling Miri under the chin.

“This contract means I can work from home,” Solarin added and Harry’s eyes brightened.

“Work from home? That’s possible?” Harry asked.

Severus smiled. “Entirely. Remus does it, he writes books on defence. I was also considering working from home myself.”

“Writing about potions?” Bill asked.

“Not just writing. I know of several potential clients who can’t even brew a simple pain potion. I could make a small fortune.”

“What, you mean like an owl order service? Potions to order?” Phoenix asked as Charlie poured her more apple juice.

“Exactly. Mad-Eye mentioned something about him helping me set it all up.”

“I like it. It means you can be home with me all the time and keep yourself from going nuts,” Harry mused. He had begun to wonder what Severus would do now he was no longer a teacher. The Slytherin didn’t seem the type to be a ‘kept man’ and Harry had no intentions of letting his husband sitting idle, not when he had such a skill.

“I knew you would,” Severus said, kissing him. “This way I can tutor you and Nixie for your N.E.W.T.’s, along with your parents and a few others, and keep myself from going stir crazy. I need something to occupy my time, I may as well make some money from it.”

Harry beamed at him. “You think of everything,” Harry said and Severus blushed slightly, remembering their first time.

“One does what one can to ensure ones husbands satisfaction in all areas of his life,” Severus said, trying to regain his cool.

“I have no complaints,” Harry said, winking at him.

Everyone chuckled and Solarin shuddered. 

“Way too much info,” she said, giving them a glare that clearly meant ‘you two are twisted’.

“Makes up for all the things I know about you that I wish I didn’t,” Severus said reasonably. 

Solarin spluttered for a few moments, Bill going bright red, before she got a mischievous glint in her eyes. 

“What was his name again?” she asked lightly.

“Who?” Severus said, having missed the sparkle.

“That guy you had that fling with a few years after we moved to Hogsmeade. I should remember, you did scream his name all night,” she replied and Severus choked on his sip of coffee. Harry dissolved into a fit of hilarity, tears streaming down his face, Miri giggling with him.

“Shut up,” Severus snapped. The whole kitchen was laughing at him, so he plucked up Miri and moved towards the door.

“Me and my daughter are going to the library, where there are no people to mock me,” Severus said firmly, just in time for Solarin to make a declaration.

“I remember now. His name was Raul. He left that hickey on your wrist, didn’t he?”

Severus gaped at her before sweeping from the room, laughter following him.

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Remus growled. ‘Bloody healers and their flipping insistence to poke and prod me,’ he muttered, his healer chuckling.

He had allowed Sirius to drag him into the office of Healer Samuel Jones, who was a werewolf himself. He had been Remus’ primary healer for over a decade. He was good at his job and had no prejudices against Remus, a rarity amongst werewolves, as the two of them had both been turned by Greyback when they were young. Samuel was a rather thin man in his mid forties with a baby face and a boyish grin. He smiled more often than anything else, and treated all his regular patients like old friends, insisting that they call him Sam. He asked, never ordered, and was always honest. It made him a very popular choice for witches and wizards who were wary of healers, despite his condition. He was marvellous with children as well, so many werewolves brought their children to him, finding him easier than a regular healer. It was for these reasons, and that his father was on the Board of Directors, that made St. Mungo’s keep him on despite his ‘monthlies’. He still received his fair share of abuse and prejudice, but Sam seemed to take it all in his stride. He was single and still looking, and he cheekily said he was happy staying that way, that it was too much fun going on the pull to give it up. He made Remus smile.

Sam had asked a series of questions after Remus had explained his symptoms. These questions were easy to answer: how long had it been going on? Was there any particular trigger for the symptoms? Had he eaten anything unusual? Who made his last batch of Wolfsbane? It was easy, it was expected. Remus found it to be quite a nice meeting really.

The next bit was not so pleasant. Sam had asked to examine Remus, something the werewolf would have refused flat out had Sirius not been with him. Remus found himself shirtless, lying on a padded bench, his abdomen being felt by Sam. At least his hands were warm. He was at the brink of ripping the nice healer to pieces in an attempt to protect himself when Sirius bent down and kissed his forehead. 

Remus groaned in pain.

“That’s the part that’s tender?” Sam asked, his honey eyes kind.

“Bloody painful is a more accurate description, but yes, the majority of the pain is there,” Remus grit out. To his immense relief, Sam’s hands moved away from it. Sam listened to his heart, took his blood pressure, recorded his temperature. He did it all the muggle way. He checked his ears, eyes, nose and throat. The man didn’t miss a thing. Well, a thing from the waist up. Sam had not requested that Remus expose his lower half and Remus was grateful for that, though he had been asked to open his trousers so Sam could fully get to his abdomen.

Remus liked Sam. The man understood that a muggle approach was better than a wizarding one with an ailing werewolf. It was, perhaps, a little unorthodox, but it was what made Remus relaxed enough to actually let the man near him. All the spells other healers used without a second thought played havoc with his system and he didn’t need anymore reason to reject his breakfast. He had actually managed to keep it down for a whole hour and a half so far, and he felt rather proud of himself for it.

“All right, sit up for me, Remus,” Sam said and Remus complied, Sam’s hands going to his throat to press at it. “I’m just checking your glands. It could be something very simple. With people like us it is all too easy to upset our internal balance.”

Sam smiled at him and Remus smiled back. Sam never referred to Remus as ‘animal’ or ‘creature’ or ‘beast’. He always said ‘us’ and ‘our’ and ‘people’. It made Remus feel fairly relaxed. He felt very comfortable with this healer. He kept his mind away from the trouble he had gone to finding one he didn’t want to murder. It had taken him until his mid-twenties. Remus made a metal note to call his mother.

“How are your children getting on?” Sam asked as he felt the protrusions of Remus’ ribs and then his spine.

Remus hissed in discomfort but smiled through it. “Harry is doing very well, he had a wonderful time at his birthday party. Nixie is fine, becoming more and more like Sirius by the minute,” Remus replied fondly as Sam pulled out a syringe.

“Are you comfortable with me drawing a little blood? It will be kinder on your system if I cast my spells on the sample rather than you.” Remus nodded and squeaked at the cold alcohol pad. “How is Harry’s little girl?”

“Miri? Ouch! She’s fine, getting bigger every day. She is a very happy little girl,” Remus said as the needle was plunged into his arm. Remus was always impressed when Sam managed to keep up a conversation and still do his job. He forever remembered what you had told him about your family, too. Sam remembered that he and Sirius had been together since they were fifteen, that Harry loved chocolate, that Sirius was allergic to unicorns, that Phoenix adored cats. Remus took it as a sign that the man truly cared about his patients. 

Remus had last been to see Sam a few days after Draco had been changed into Phoenix, just a simple check up where Sam had proclaimed him in perfect health, if a little run down from the last moon. The time before had been just after Miri was born, a visit to make sure he wasn’t going mad. He had been convinced that his aversion to the baby had been something affecting him. Sam was the one who had convinced him to seek Albus’ guidance.

“How are her barriers developing?” Sam asked as he withdrew the needle. “It must be quite a challenge for Harry to raise such a special little girl, being so young himself.”

“He does find it challenging but he seems to be doing very well with it, we all help out and he asks one of us if he has a parenting question. He’s very good at asking for the help he needs. And Mad-Eye says her barriers are developing nicely.”

“Good to hear. Let me know how Harry handles it when she starts walking. Solarin Snape lives with you doesn’t she?”

“Severus’ sister? Yes, she lives with us,” Sirius confirmed.

“Will you remind her that she needs to come in for a check up sometime soon? She hasn’t been to see me for a few years, I sent her a letter, but she hasn’t made an appointment yet,” Sam said, securing the cotton ball he placed against Remus’ arm with a piece of tape.

“We’ll remind her when we get home,” Remus assured.

“Thank you. You remember the drawings I used to have pinned up in here?” Remus nodded. “Solarin was the one who drew them for me.”

“My mother used to love those drawings,” Remus said affectionately as Sam measured his pulse.

“It’s been quite a few years since Sol last did me one,” Sam said with a smile. “You can get dressed now. I don’t see the need for an internal at this point. I’d like to ask a few more questions before I consider an invasive examination.”

Remus sighed in relief, pulled on his shirt and buttoned his trousers as Sam performed a few charms on his blood sample, beckoning them over to his desk after a few minutes. They sat down and Sam smiled at them

“The blood looks fine, it just seems to be a hormonal imbalance as far as I can tell. I’d like to find the cause though.” He smiled at his patient. “Now, the part you don’t like, Remus. The personal questions. I wouldn’t ask unless I needed to know,” Sam said and Remus growled. Sirius entwined their fingers.

“If you must,” Remus said and Sam pulled out a muggle pad of paper. He poured out the tea that he had set to brew as they had entered his office and motioned for them to help themselves to biscuits as he reclined in his chair. Sam always liked to make this part of the examination seem like friends talking, he felt it was the best way to handle gathering information as personal as a patients sex life.

“So, how many times a week are the two of you intimate?” Sam asked as Sirius handed Remus his tea.

“Five or six on average. Depending on the week, it’s sometimes more, sometimes less,” Sirius said as Remus blushed. It was probably best for the insatiable Sirius Black to answer these questions. Remus was not the type to go into details of their sex life without Veritaserum. 

“And are you careful of infection?”

“Yes. Remus and I never bite too hard, no matter how wild it gets.” He sniggered. “Very wild, but no breaking the skin.”

Sam chuckled. He decided right there and then he quite liked Remus’ mate. “What about scratching, do you indulge in that?”

“Yes. Should we not scratch?” Sirius asked worriedly.

“No, it’s fine. I just need to be clear on the details. Most people like me and Remus are fond of scratching, it allows us to mark our partners without the risk of infecting them. Part of the wolf rising. It’s very common during mating,” Sam said calmly. He tried not to think of the latest partner he had marked the night before. A pretty little thing. She had not been a natural blonde, he could vouch for that.

“Oh. All right,” Sirius said with a smile, sipping his tea and glancing at his husband. Remus was silent beside him and seemed to be fascinated with the floor tiles. He leaned over and kissed his cheek.

“I just cannot answer these, Siri,” Remus muttered.

“It’s all right. I have it covered. Have a biscuit, one of the ginger ones might settle your stomach.” Sirius returned to the healer as Remus began to nibble on a gingersnap. “Next question?”

“Do the two of you still take precautions against pregnancy?” Sam asked.

“Yes.”

“What do you use? Are you still using the Daily Potion?”

“Yes, still the Daily Potion.”

“And which one of you takes it?”

“Both of us. We like to be completely safe.”

Sam smiled. “I wish all my patients said that,” he joked. “Which one of you is the alpha?” It was a discreet question, a very polite way of asking who was the top in the bedroom. Sirius, however, didn’t see it quite the right way.

“Remus. He’s the alpha of the pack. He is definitely the head of the family.”

Remus sniggered. “He means in the bedroom, Siri,” he mumbled and Sirius laughed. “He already knows I’m an alpha wolf. He wants to know about our mating.”

“Sorry, got mixed up in that one,” Sirius admitted with an embarrassed smile and Sam chuckled.

“It’s all right, easy mistake to make. I should have been more clear perhaps. I just find it’s easier for the one answering the questions if I phrase it that way. I apologise. Shall we try that one again?” he suggested and Sirius nodded.

“We don’t really have an alpha. I suppose Remus is, closer to the moon. But we both…umm…dominate,” he said, finding it a little difficult to find the right word to describe it.

Remus peeked up from the floor to find Sam making a few notes on his paper. He used a muggle ballpoint pen. 

“Now, is there any incidence where you might have missed a dose of your potion, Remus? Maybe, things got a little hectic, or it slipped your mind?” Sam asked, making Remus cringe. 

“We have never forgotten the potion and we’ve been using it for twenty years, on and off,” Remus said quietly.

“Every day at midday,” Sirius added.

Sam considered it. There was a slim chance that it could have failed working for them. Sam had heard, from one of his colleagues, of the Daily Potion losing its effectiveness with prolonged usage. It was rare, but it had happened. It didn’t seem likely, though, not with Severus living in the same house as the couple.

“Well, in that case, the only thing I can suggest is an internal examination,” Sam said finally, after a pause and a sip of tea. “I can’t figure out what this is, and the only thing left is an internal. I know you don’t like them, Remus, but I really wouldn’t like to send you away without answers. This isn’t adding up for me, I need a clearer illustration of what is going on inside you, and this is the best way.”

“Do we have to?” Remus groaned.

“I’m afraid so. I’d like a full picture of what is going on, and I’m reluctant to use spells on you while you feel so ill, so I really need to do one. Sirius can stay if you want him to, of course.”

Remus sighed at the look his husband gave him. “I’m not getting out of this, am I?” Remus asked him.

“Nope,” Sirius said. “Let me fuss, Moony. Let the good healer take a look. Think of it this way, it’ll all be worth it if it means you feel better.”

“You will stay, right?”

“Try and stop me.”

Remus huffed. “Fine. You and your bloody charm.” Sirius grinned, looking suspiciously like Snuffles the dog, as they called his Animagus form.

“Good man. Slip behind the screen and get undressed. There’s a gown behind there for you. Put it on and call us when you’re ready,” Sam said cheerfully and Remus wanted to throttle him. Damn short temper.

Sirius smirked at his husbands murderous expression as Remus slipped behind the screen.

“So, how are the two of you handling parenthood? It can’t be easy, what with Harry being married so soon after the adoption,” Sam said, offering the Animagus a chocolate truffle.

Sirius chuckled around his mouthful of confection. “We’re getting by. It’s odd, seeing Harry with Severus, but I think we’re finally used to it. At least, as used to it as we are likely to get at this point.”

“You and Severus were never very friendly in school, were you? Remus told me years ago about you trying to feed Severus to him once when you were younger.”

Sirius grinned sheepishly. “No, we never got along. But we seem to have come to some sort of equilibrium now. Though, at the party last night, we managed to end up trying to out drink each other. I suppose we’ll never really be best buds, but we’re managing not to kill each other for the moment.”

“Just so you know, Siri, that booze was a fake. The green stuff? It was switched by the Odd Trio. You were had, Padfoot,” Remus said, poking his head around the screen, smirking at the dumbfounded look on his lovers face. “And you were complaining about being left out. I’m ready, by the way.”

Sam and Sirius made their way over, Sirius shaking his head and laughing quietly to himself. Sam patted the bench and Remus found himself staring at the ceiling once more as he lay back. Sirius gripped his hands, holding them by his head, and leaned in to give him an upside down kiss.

“I’m right here,” Sirius murmured, making Remus smile shakily.

“All right, Remus. Knees up and apart for me,” Sam said as he slipped on a pair of latex gloves. Remus did as he was told and tried to relax. It wasn’t easy when all he wanted to do was behave like his inner wolf and snarl at the man popping open a tube of lubricant.

“I hate this,” Remus muttered and Sirius smiled.

“I know, but it’s only for a moment,” Sirius soothed.

Remus sighed and fidgeted, feeling exposed. Maybe he should have demanded the spells? Really, how much worse could they make him feel?

“Try and relax for me, Remus,” Sam instructed as he placed his dry hand on Remus’ lower abdomen, very gently. It was right over his sore spot so Sam was very careful to keep his touch as light as possible.

Remus took a deep breath and flinched as the fingers touched him. “Cold,” he muttered and made the effort to relax. He bore down as Sam instructed and gritted his teeth against the feeling of being breached. He moaned in discomfort at the two fingers in his rectum, but kept still. He kept fighting the urge to pull away, to protest at someone else other than his mate touching him so intimately. He managed it, but only because Sirius was holding his hands, rubbing his nose along his forehead and kissing it every few moments.

“I can’t believe I was had,” Sirius said.

“Believe it. Sol told me and Harry just before I passed out,” Remus confirmed, squirming slightly at the feel of the slick fingers moving inside him. He really hoped Sam was straight, because his technique left a lot to be desired. “Besides, Severus is a given target for Sol. You were had because you were competing with the ringleaders brother.”

“Solarin still pulling pranks then?” Sam asked, his eyes fixed on the wall as he tried to figure out what he was feeling.

“I don’t think she’ll ever kick the habit,” Sirius said with a smile, looking at the grinning healer.

“Severus used to complain about it all the time when he used to bring her to see me when she was younger. How are the two of you handling Nixie and her boyfriend living in the same house?” Sam enquired. 

The two shared a chuckle. “Sirius threatened to kill him,” Remus revealed.

“I did not. I just told him firmly that he was to sleep in his own bed,” Sirius corrected, but his next statement faltered in his throat at the confused look on Sam’s face. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m not sure, it’s probably nothing. I’m sorry, just a little longer,” Sam said, his tone neutral to keep his patient from attacking him. A sick werewolf was best handled with caution. “Remus, I need you to keep very still for me. I apologise but I need to press down on your abdomen.”

Remus took a deep breath and nodded, crushing Sirius’ hands and fair near screaming as his sore front was pushed. The pressure disappeared and so did Sam’s fingers, Remus sighing in relief.

“Get yourself cleaned up and then come and join me,” Sam said as he stripped off his gloves and chucked them into the bin, giving nothing away.

A few minutes later, after a quick detour to the bathroom so Remus could be sick, Remus and Sirius were once again sat in their seats, their hands joined as Sam performed a few more spells on Remus’ blood sample. 

Sam sat back and sighed. “Well, I can tell you what is going on,” he assured. “Remus, you are twelve weeks pregnant.”

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Harry peaked his head around the library door to find Severus lying on the carpet with his head propped up on one elbow, facing the door, Miri wriggling on her back on the floor in front of him. He was dangling one of her shiny fairy toys above her, talking to her about what a clever girl she was as she summoned it with her magic from his hand, seemingly talking back to him with her babbles. 

Harry pulled out his wand and summoned his camera. As he snapped the photo, Severus spoke.

“I am going to remove that girls vocal cords.”

Harry smiled. “She was only teasing,” Harry said as he made his way over, Miri squealing in delight as she caught sight of him. He lay down on his side, his back to Severus’ front, and lay his head on his outstretched arm as she waved her soft shiny fairy at him. He and Miri were almost eye level with each other and she giggled at him as he stuck his tongue out at her. She copied him and Harry laughed.

“It was not funny,” Severus insisted.

“It was.”

“For you, maybe. I, on the other hand, do not enjoy having my sexual history brought up in polite company.”

Harry turned his head to look at him, only to find Severus smirking down at him. “Why are you smirking?” Harry asked, nervous.

“Tell me about your past. I do not mean that man. I mean, who else did you date in Hogwarts, apart from Miss Chang? Did you see anyone but her?” Severus asked. “I will tell you mine, if you tell me yours.”

Harry stared at Miri, watching her face scrunch up as she began to whimper. He placed his hand on her belly. “No, sweetheart. No look, no see,” he instructed. It was something Moody had taught them, a way to tell Miri when not to use her abilities. It was the first exercise for her to try and use her barriers. So far, she was doing pretty well with it. After a few minutes, she settled and Harry gave her the green stuffed dragon that was lying near her head as a reward. She immediately began to suck on its tail.

Harry sighed. How to explain it? It was hard enough to think about it, let alone put it into words. He needed time to figure it out.

“You first,” Harry said and Severus hummed in agreement.

“Well, when I was a student, I had a brief encounter with a girl called Theresa Michaels. She was a year above me. We slept together once and then she dumped me for Walden Macnair, who she later married. It was for the best, she lacked a piece of anatomy I rather enjoy,” Severus revealed, sliding his hand briefly across Harry’s crotch. Harry chuckled. “Then there was the aforementioned Raul. I dated him for about two weeks. I was about…twenty one, twenty two maybe. I hadn’t realized Solarin would remember him in the house. I made sure that he was gone before she got up in the morning. How that blasted girl heard us is beyond me. We did use silencing charms.”

“Maybe she was peeking into your head,” Harry offered. “You said she tends to wander through minds when she sleeps.”

“That must be it,” Severus agreed. “So, there was Theresa Michaels, Raul and the Dark Lord.”

“That’s it?”

“There was one other, but you will not want to know.” He didn’t want Harry to know, but he had promised to be honest with him. It was up to Harry now if he wanted to know or not.

“Why not? Come on, tell me,” Harry asked, seeing the uncertainty in his husbands eyes.

“I slept with Lucius once,” Severus admitted quietly after a long pause. “It was in Hogwarts, I was experimenting with my sexuality and he was the one I messed around with.”

Harry was still for a moment, before he burst into a fit of giggles. “Oh God!” he gasped out. “I guess we have more in common than we thought!”

Severus laughed with him, and kissed his exposed neck. “I guess so. He was a lousy lay, I’ll tell you. All wand, no skill.” Severus nibbled his neck, making Harry’s hysterical giggles turn into moans. 

“Nothing changed for him then,” Harry joked and Severus snorted.

“So, I have dated Theresa, and Raul. Been the plaything of the Dark Lord, and had a one night stand with the blond bastard. I think that about covers my past. You know, now I think about my past, I am much more thankful to have you in my life.”

“Why?” 

“Because you are the best thing to ever happen to me. I have never and will never love anyone as much as I love you,” Severus declared firmly. Harry smiled and kissed him. “And I have never had better joinings in my life. I adore claiming you.”

Harry grinned. “I definitely enjoy that bit of our marriage. And I love you too, more than anyone.” Miri shrieked as she lost hold of her dragon and Harry retrieved it for her. “Well, you’re a joint first,” Harry said. “The two of you have a half of my heart each.”

“I like that. I will share you with Miri. But no one else,” Severus said possessively, draping his arm further around Harry’s waist. “Bloody Gryffindor mauling you last night. I swear, if he wasn’t a friend of yours I would annihilate him for touching you.”

Harry sniggered. “I think he got the message that you own me. I think they all did,” Harry soothed.

“So…what of your history? I told you mine.”

Harry sighed. It was now or never. “Cedric,” Harry said softly.

“Excuse me?”

“Cedric Diggory. We never did anything more than kiss, we mostly just spent time together. But we were dating when…when he…he died,” Harry finished quietly, picking at the carpet.

Severus was stunned. He had not imagined that there was anything like that. “I’m sorry, love. I didn’t know,” Severus said, hugging him close.

“No one did, not even our friends. Back then, I still hated what I am, and he was sweet, he said he would wait for me to be ready for him to touch me, even if he didn’t know my reasons for pulling away. We were never ready to tell anyone. We never got further than a few kisses, it was no great romance. But when we were in that maze, it was all right, because he was with me. I wasn’t alone. I didn’t love him, it was more a friendship than anything. But it still hurt when Voldemort killed him,” Harry explained. He smiled. “I guess that’s how I know I love you.”

Severus gazed down on him as he rolled to his back, half lying under Severus as he turned.

“What I feel for you is so strong, so powerful, that everything else pales in comparison. I know now that me and Cedric weren’t anything more than friends who had kissed a few times. I know now that Cho was just using me. She has a thing for famous wizards. Plus, I didn’t enjoy kissing her that much, probably because she’s female. And I know that I love you. I love you so much I don’t know how not to,” Harry declared and pulled Severus down for a kiss.

“So, I dated Cedric, got used by Cho, was the plaything of the blonde bastard, and love you more than life. I think that covers me,” Harry said, smiling as Severus kissed him again, deep and fiery, like a brand.

“I love you,” Severus whispered against his lips. “Forever.”

“Forever.”

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Sam left a stunned Remus and Sirius in his office and made his way over to his secretary.

“Polly, can you reschedule all my other appointments for today?” he asked as she smiled at him.

“Of course, Healer Jones. Is there anything else I can do for you?” 

Sam smiled. She was a nice little witch, fresh from Hogwarts. He had not yet managed to convince her to call him Sam, but he was determined.

“Yes, can I have the documents on male pregnancy in lycanthropes?”

She reached into her desk and handed him the pack she retrieved.

“Thank you. I don’t want to be disturbed,” he said as he made his way back to his office. The pair were still sitting in their seats, matching expressions of shock on their faces.

He reclaimed his chair and sat back, waiting for them to regain themselves. He sighed and rubbed his hands through his droopy brown hair. This was not what he had envisioned when he had seen Remus’ name on the top of his appointment schedule for the day. He had assumed it to be a simple check up, like the visit a few weeks ago, or maybe a small concern, like the visit before that. He had never imagined that Remus would end up showing symptoms like this.

As he waited patiently, he remembered the first time he had seen Remus. He had been twenty five, and had hated healers so much that he had brought his mother with him. Sam had been thirty four, and had been treating patients for five years. Remus had been a patient that he had clicked with, and he had never had to treat the man for anything worse than a cold or a few after effects of the full moon. The first time he had seen Remus, it had been a simple check up, just to establish his all round health. Eleven years was a long time to be treating a patient, and over the years Sam had learned a great deal of the ex-teacher. He knew a hell of a lot more than just Remus’ physical side.

Over the duration of his care, Remus had seen Sam for a chance to talk in confidentiality with someone who wouldn’t hold any prejudices against him more than anything else. Most of the concerns the younger man had brought to him were over his longing for Sirius, his feelings of hurt over the apparent betrayal of their friends. Sam had rather enjoyed the appointment where Remus had told him of Sirius’ innocence and freedom. The two of them had married a mere three weeks out of Hogwarts, so the separation and Sirius’ apparent guilt had been hard on Remus, therefore Sam had been relieved to see the man smile genuinely. It was a nice surprise for Sam to have actually met the much discussed Sirius Black this morning.

Sam returned his attentions to the couple as Sirius came out of his stupor.

“How does a male pregnancy actually happen? We never thought it would happen to us, so I think we need some explanations,” Sirius said, deciding to go with hard facts before they addressed this new situation.

It was a common question, something most males who found themselves pregnant asked. Usually, it wasn’t the first question, but the healer wasn’t going to push it. He was lucky one of them was actually talking so soon. Sam pulled out a diagram of the inside of a males body during early pregnancy from the pile of papers and held it up so they could see it as he began to explain. 

“Right, I’m going to explain this in terms of you and Remus,” he clarified, waiting for the nod from the Pureblood before he began. “What’s happened is, as your semen has entered Remus, his magic has latched onto it. Remus’ magic has recognised the attempt to create a child. In biological terms, that is the main purpose of sex. His magic has taken your seed, which contains an echo of your magic, and fused it with Remus’ magic and genetic material, creating what we call a blastocyst. It’s a fancy word for a cluster of cells that are the beginnings of an embryo, and eventually a foetus.” Sam scanned their faces, making sure he hadn’t lost them along the way. He grabbed his pen and motioned to what appeared to be a bubble attached to the outside of the rectum that was displayed in the diagram. “Remus’ magic then created what is, in essence, a uterus. There are no fallopian tubes, no ovaries, but it is a home for the child to develop. That is what this bubble is,” Sam said, circling it with the end of his pen. “Are you with me so far?”

Sirius nodded and, to Sam’s surprise, so did Remus. He hadn’t thought Remus was listening to him, he seemed too stunned to take anything in.

“Good. Right, now this little ring,” he said, pointing to the place the bubble joined the intestine. “This is, in effect, a cervix. This will remain closed until the time of delivery. There’s a little more to it than that, but that’s the basics of how a male pregnancy occurs.”

“How long are male pregnancies and how does delivery of the child work?” Sirius questioned.

“Male pregnancies are the same length as a female, nine months. As for delivery, this temporary uterus begins to contract, which will open the acting cervix wide enough to allow the child passage. Remus would, theoretically, deliver anally. As with all births, it comes out the same way it went in. However, the anus was not intended to stretch that much, so I always opt for a caesarean in the case of a male pregnancy,” Sam described, glossing over the finer details.

He had been present at only one male natural anal birth, and it was not an enjoyable experience. It was back in his days as a student, when they were still letting all men deliver naturally as a rule. The poor man had laboured hard for four days straight and torn himself in half actually pushing the child out. The pushing had been what Sam had witnessed, and it had been horrific to observe. After the birth, the man had required extensive surgery to repair his damaged anus, and he had never been able to function properly after that. To this day, he was still the wearer of a colostomy bag. It was much safer, and kinder, for the carrying male to go through a caesarean than natural anal birth. Sam always opted for surgery as the method of delivery for his patients, though he did know of a select few healers who were traditionalists, who still let men kill themselves trying to push out a baby.

“How did this happen? We’ve always been careful,” Sirius asked.

“Usually, the Daily Potion suppresses your magic’s natural urge to create life. Do the two of you use the same brand of potion that you have always used?”

“No. We changed it recently. Could I be pregnant?” Sirius asked, his voice shaky.

“Can I run a charm on you?” Sam asked and Sirius nodded. He performed a simple diagnostic charm and shook his head. “No, you are not pregnant. How long ago did you change brands?”

“About four months, roughly.”

“And you and Remus have been taking the same one?”

“No,” Remus said, his voice weak. “I take a different one. It’s new.”

“Do you know the name of it?” Sam asked and both Sirius and Remus pulled out small vials of potion.

“We didn’t know how long we would be here so we brought today’s dose with us. We didn’t want to miss it,” Remus explained as they handed them over.

Sam glanced at Sirius’ vial and handed it back. It was the standard potion, brewed by the same company that had been brewing it for several decades. The only thing new was the packaging. It was common practice, changing the packaging to entice new customers. 

But Remus’ vial held the solution as to how this had happened.

“Why do you take this one, Remus? Why not the same as Sirius?” Sam asked, keeping his voice calm to control the situation.

“This one was marketed as containing monkshood. The box said it was designed for werewolves,” Remus said warily. He had a feeling that Sam was about to tell him something he wasn’t going to like.

“And where did you purchase it?”

“Diagon Alley. It’s a new place, it’s near Ollivander’s.”

“Madame Mystic’s Apothecary?”

“That’s it. Why?”

Sam sighed. “That place has just been shut down by the Ministry. Everything sold there has been proved to be a fake.” He held up the vial. “This has been tested and proven to be nothing more than flavoured coloured water. Madame Mystic is being prosecuted for fraud and endangering the public,” Sam explained, watching Remus’ face drop.

“Why would someone do that?” Sirius asked angrily.

“To make money. I can’t tell you how many people I have seen over the last two weeks who have suffered bad reactions to fake products from her. You’re not the only ones to be taken in.”

“So, what happens now?” Remus asked, skimming over his being conned. “What are the options?”

Sam pulled out a few pamphlets and handed them to the couple. “Well, there are two options open to you. Option one is that you go ahead with the pregnancy, though I don’t recommend it. Option two is a termination, which is what I would advise.”

“Why?” Remus asked. “Why should we terminate?”

Sam leaned forwards, resting his elbows on his knees and looked them in the eyes, darting from one to the other. 

“You need to understand that the risks for you if you go ahead with this pregnancy are extremely high. Within a male pregnancy, there are always high risks. With a male pregnancy in someone like us, it is very dangerous.”

“What kind of risks?” Sirius asked.

Sam decided that honesty was the best policy. They had to understand just what they were dealing with, even if the honest truth was not pleasant. “Risks like miscarriage. It is the most common complication within a male gestation. The male body is not designed to carry a child, so the body usually rejects it. To give you an idea of what you’re dealing with, in a normal male gestation, someone who is not a werewolf, the chance of miscarriage is sixty to seventy percent. Within that, the chance of death of the one carrying the child is fifty percent. In example, take one hundred pregnant males. Sixty of those will miscarry, and of those sixty, thirty of them will die losing the baby.”

Remus reached for his tea, taking a shaky sip and Sam felt it best to pause so they could take in what he had said. Plus, he didn’t fancy Remus spilling his tea all over himself. A scalding would not be a good thing for the younger man right now.

“What about in men like us?” Remus asked.

“The numbers are higher. Take one hundred pregnant male lycanthropes. Eighty of those will miscarry, and of those eighty, seventy of them will die losing the baby,” Sam answered frankly. 

He talked them through the other risks, such as blood clots, heart attacks and respiratory difficulties, and they listened to all of them, thumbing through the pamphlets as he pointed out certain passages. They seemed to be taking it well, considering he had just told them Remus’ life was currently at risk.

“What if I decided to go through with this?” Remus asked. “What if I decided to go ahead with the pregnancy?”

Sam sighed. He hated it when they said that, and he knew Remus could be stubborn. Remus had wanted children for so long. It wasn’t enough for him to have adopted two, he wanted more.

“I’m going to be blunt. Theoretically, if you were to do this, you would not be able to use any magic, nor have any spells cast on you for the rest of the pregnancy. You would have to be rendered unconscious for the full three days of the full moon. If it were up to me, I would admit you for the next six months, but that’s not practical and it’s against hospital regulations, so you would have to be on almost complete bed rest at home. You would have to refrain from any sexual activity until delivery. I would need to see you twice a week every week until you deliver. The nausea, fatigue, irritability and abdominal pain would get worse as you progressed,” he reeled off. “You would also require a caesarean to deliver. You are just not built to give birth naturally.”

“Why no magic?” Sirius asked.

“This pregnancy is being sustained by Remus’ magic. However, if his magic is stimulated too much then his body will recognise that this pregnancy is not supposed to be there. His magic will react accordingly and destroy the foetus.”

They fell into stunned silence, and Sam could just see the gears in Remus’ head working. He was, therefore, surprised by Remus’ next question.

“What’s involved with a termination?” Remus asked quietly. Sirius reached out and grabbed his hand, gratified when Remus returned the grip.

Sam sighed and hung his head, centring himself before he looked Remus in the eye. He really hated delivering news of a male pregnancy. It was not a pleasant way to see a patient, especially when said patient was someone he considered a friend.

“We would admit you for the procedure. You would be dosed with a potion to stimulate your magic, terminating the pregnancy. We would then surgically remove the foetus and the uterus, which you would be unconscious for. It is a relatively quick and painless procedure, but we would need to keep you in for a few days, just to keep an eye on you, make sure there are no complications,” Sam explained.

Sirius and Remus looked at each other, each trying to decide what they wanted to do.

“I’ll go and get something to eat, so you two can use this room to talk in private. I’ll be back in about an hour,” Sam said, standing up and moving towards the door. They nodded at him and he let himself out into the hall, closing the door.

“Polly, please do not let anyone into my office. It is occupied at the moment,” Sam instructed and made his way down the hall to the stairs at her nod. 

He made his way to the canteen and selected a simple salad and a water. His stomach was roiling at the thought of the conversation occurring in his absence, so he kept his choice light.

“Jones, did you see the werewolf yet?” 

He spun around to find Healer Thompson was the one talking to him. He was not fond of Thompson. He found the man to be a pompous arrogant extrovert. Thompson was more interested in looking good than his patients wellbeing. He was a traditionalist healer, which meant that he was a healer who still allowed natural anal deliveries. All that, and his prejudice against werewolves, grated on Sam.

“Are you referring to Mr. Lupin-Black?” Sam said, his tone frosty. He really hated it when other healers referred to patients by their conditions or their symptoms. They were here to treat people, not simply their illnesses.

“Yes, that one. Have you seen him yet?”

“Yes, I have.”

“Well, when you have a free moment, there’s someone from the Ministry who would like to discuss his case with you.”

Sam stared at the man, his temper bubbling. “Not another fucking official on about legislation,” he mumbled to himself.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that,” Thompson said.

Sam waved it away with his hand. “Nothing, nothing, I was just musing to myself. Any idea what this official wants to talk about?”

“Something about his mated status,” Thompson said dismissively. “I told her to make an appointment with your secretary, but she is still floating around.”

“Thank you for informing me.”

Thompson moved away and Sam sat down to eat his lunch. Ministry officials were always interfering with his lycanthropic patients, low level idiots trying to get themselves promoted. Usually, they were easy to get rid of. There were the odd one or two that were persistent, but they too were easily dealt with. If Remus decided to go ahead with the pregnancy, there would be legal problems for him as well as health issues.

In Sam’s opinion, Remus was a nice man. He had been through so much already. He didn’t need this added strain. Sam found himself suddenly determined to protect him. They had both been turned by Greyback, biologically, they were both in the same pack. And a pack did what it had to, to protect its own.

“Sammy, are you all right?”

Sam looked up to find his father, Jack, sitting opposite him, chuckling. Sam was his fathers double, but younger. Jack, a Muggleborn, had ensured that Sam had received an education in muggle and magical medicine, reasoning that he wanted his son to have the best of both worlds. Sam knew that his father hated that he was a werewolf. Not that he hated it because of his son exhibiting slight wolf traits, those amused him for the most part. No, he hated it because of the prejudice his son faced. Jack was one of the biggest supporters of werewolf rights, and he was very good at dealing with the Ministry.

“Sorry, dad, I didn’t see you. I was miles away.”

His father smiled fondly at him. “Always away with your head in the clouds, wool-gathering. You’ve always been the same, I’m used to it. I asked you how your day was going,” he said affectionately. 

Sam blushed, grinning. “My day? It’s fine. Unexpected, but fine. Yours?”

“Same old thing, a witch with a head cold and a wizard with dragon flu,” Jack reeled off. “Unexpected? I was under the impression that you were seeing Remus Lupin-Black this morning.”

Sam sighed. “I did. Well, I still am. I left him and his mate in my office to talk. Remus is yet another poor unfortunate who fell victim to Madame Mystic,” he explained and his father frowned.

“Poor man. What has he fallen victim of?”

“The Daily Potion.”

Jack paled. “Is he…?”

“Yes.”

“And will he…?”

“I don’t know yet. Plus, now there’s some bloody Ministry twat sniffing around, wanting to talk about Remus.” Sam growled. “Remus is a nice man, he doesn’t need some pumped up little twit poking around, especially not now,” he complained.

Jack smiled. “I’ll see what I can do. You take care of Remus, and I will deal with the pumped up little twit.” 

Jack stood and patted his son on the shoulder before he moved away, off to fight the battle.

Sam picked at his salad, his appetite a distant memory. He hated that he was hoping Remus would opt for the termination, but he was acting in the best interests of his patient. In all likelihood, Remus would not carry the child to term. In fact, he would be lucky to make it through another month. And if he were to miscarry, it would probably kill him. It would take divine intervention to allow Remus to deliver a healthy baby.

Sam found himself hoping for a miracle.

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Solarin made her way down the sterile hallways and shuddered. Why oh why couldn’t hospitals be a more welcoming place? She was convinced that she wouldn’t hate seeing her healer so much if the building was more friendly.

“Healer Samuel Jones’ office, can I help you?”

Solarin grimaced. That girl was much too cheerful. What had happened to the old secretary?

“Yes, I need to make an appointment to see Healer Jones for a check up,” Solarin said calmly.

“I’ll see what’s open,” she said as she twiddled her hair. Definitely a Hufflepuff.

“Don’t bother, I’ll see her this afternoon.”

Solarin spun round to see Sam walking towards them, a smile on his face.

“Hello, Sam. It’s good to see you,” Solarin said as he hugged her briefly.

“It’s good to see you too. I was talking about you with Sirius and Remus, wondering when I would actually see you,” Sam said and she smiled guiltily.

“Well, I decided to get all my errands out of the way and making an appointment to see you was top of my list. Are you sure you can fit me in today?”

“I can if you don’t mind waiting for me to finish with Remus,” Sam said cheerfully and she nodded.

She made her way to his waiting area and watched the scene. Sam was not as cheerful as he seemed. He was worried and it made her nervous. Sam rarely worried about anything, not to this degree, so whatever was wrong with Remus was something serious. She sighed and chose to stay out of it. It was a strict code of conduct she lived by regarding her abilities, and one of them was to leave things be if they were not her business. To that end, she did not pry into peoples thoughts regarding medical problems, relationships or touchy subjects.

She pulled a textbook from her bag and opened it, flipping to the right page, reading the passage for what seemed to be the millionth time. It couldn’t be right. Bill would be devastated if it was. When she had begun the research for her book on augurs, she had not expected to find something so bad.

She found herself praying that Sam could ease her worries.

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Sam slipped into his office and regained his seat once more. The two men across from him looked determined, and Sam once again hoped for a miracle.

“Have you reached a decision?” Sam asked, pouring himself a fresh cup of tea from the self heating, self refilling pot.

“We’re going to go ahead with the pregnancy,” Remus said. 

Sirius looked unsure of himself but said nothing. Sam just knew that this was Remus’ choice, not his husbands. It was uncommon for a werewolf to mate with a human, and Remus and Sirius being together so long was a unique phenomenon. Sam had never heard of such a relationship going the distance, but the two of them seemed more solid than any other mated couple he knew of. Sirius and Remus had obviously debated what to do, and Remus had won. Not a surprise. Sirius had said that Remus was the alpha of their pack. The alpha typically got his way.

“Remus, I want you to be absolutely clear of what you’re saying, what you’re choosing,” Sam cautioned.

“I am clear,” Remus insisted, cutting him off. “I’m going to have this baby.”

Sirius rubbed at his eyes. “Remy, let the man finish,” he said, stroking the back of his hand with his thumb. Remus looked at him. “Let him give you his speech.”

“I know this makes you worry, Siri. But I want this.”

“I know that. Which is why I’m with you all the way, even if you won’t tell me why this is so important to you. If this is what you really want to do, then so be it. But I swear to you, Remus, you will do as you are told during this. I will not let you talk your way out of obedience. I will find a way to get it from you, and don’t think I won’t sink to unthinkable levels for it. I spent twelve years in Azkaban, I will do what is needed so you can have this. Remus, I love you. I will not lose you because you’re asking the gods for more than we have already fought so hard for,” Sirius said firmly and Remus nodded. Sirius leaned in and kissed him before they turned to Sam once more. “Go on.”

“All right, if you are sure this is the road you want to go down, you need to follow my instructions to the letter, do you understand me? These are non negotiable, so don’t even think about arguing with me about them,” Sam demanded and Remus nodded. 

“He’ll follow them,” Sirius confirmed. Sirius was obviously taking Sam’s demands seriously. Remus had probably told him that Sam always asked, never ordered so this determination was helping to drive home the seriousness of the situation. 

Sam suppressed a smile as Sirius pulled out a small notebook and a self inking quill from his pocket. He was poised, ready to take notes. 

Sam sighed despite his amusement. That miracle would be nice right about now. 

“You have to refrain from magic. No floo, no Apperation, no spells, nothing, not even food prepared with magic. Nothing performed on you or cast by you. And you will give up your wand to avoid unconscious use. Potions are the only exceptions, but only ones that I or Severus give you. You need to take a nutrient potion every morning, and if you throw it up, you will take a second dose,” Sam said firmly. “No stress, you will keep as calm as possible, no exceptions. You must stay off your feet as much as possible. Set up a comfortable armchair in the living room, and a chair in the kitchen. You are only to walk from chair to chair, or chair to bed. The only exception is trips to the bathroom. I want you stationary as much as werewolfly possible.”

“I’ll see that he gets anything he might need to get up for,” Sirius reassured and Sam nodded.

“Absolutely no sex at all until you deliver. Any sexual activity is strictly prohibited beyond this point, and that includes solo activities. Absolutely nothing. I will allow kissing and embracing, but that is it. Nothing more than that. For the moon, you have to be rendered unconscious for the full three days, starting at dawn on the first day. I will not have you endangering yourself because of a monthly change. I need to have the address of your home. I know you are under the Fidelius, and I know why, so I will call Dumbledore and have him give me the information so it cannot be taken from me. I will be coming by twice a week either before or after I see my appointment patients here. I will be keeping a very close eye on you. Remus, I swear to almighty Merlin, if I find you have not been following this to the letter, I will break the regulations to admit you and have you strapped to a bed, do you hear me?”

“I hear. I will do everything you ask, I swear,” Remus promised.

Sam peered at him, measuring his honesty, and when he found no evidence of falsehood he sighed wearily. 

“Remus, I am not going to lie to you. I have never done so and I don’t intend to start now. What you are doing is incredibly dangerous. Take into consideration your gender, the amount of time that has passed since you were infected and your age and it is all a recipe for disaster. I do not like this one bit. But you are the patient, it is your body, so I will respect your decision.” 

Remus smiled momentarily at him, before his next declaration made his face drop. 

“Saying that, however, I am going to ensure that your life is not put in anymore danger than it has to be. If it comes down to a choice between saving you or the baby, I will choose to save you. I will do my best, but you are on thin ice already. There is a very high chance you will miscarry. If that happens, there will be no option of saving the child. If you begin to bleed, the child has already died. If you haemorrhage, we will need to fight to save you,” Sam clarified. “Now, are you absolutely, one hundred percent positive that this is what you want to do?”

Remus considered it for a moment before he answered. “Yes. I want to try.”

Sam sighed and handed Sirius the booklet of guidelines for a lycanthropic male gestation. “You need to read that cover to cover, learn it so you can recite it backwards. I will see you every Monday and Friday, so I will come to your house on the 3rd. For now, you are free from my clutches,” Sam said tiredly and the two shook his hand before making their way to the door, Sirius hovering over Remus as if he were spun glass. Where was that flipping miracle?

“Remus?” Sam called out as they opened the door. They looked at him. “Congratulations.”

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Harry watched as Molly mashed up a quarter of a banana, beating it with the fork until it was a smooth paste. She then proceeded to pass it through a sieve, ensuring that there were no lumps whatsoever.

“Are you sure it’s not too soon for this?” Harry asked as she poured the mixture into a small bowl. Molly glanced at Severus as she turned to face Harry, and Severus nodded in encouragement.

Severus was hovering in the shadows by the door, thinking Harry had not seen him come in as Harry had his back to him. But Harry had, and he was glad the man was there, keeping an eye on everything. He knew that Severus was hanging back so Harry could handle this on his own, but it was clear to all that Harry was not very confident with his parenting skills. For him to try this without Severus there was not a good idea at this point.

“Not at all. It’s just a taster for her. She’s still being fed by you. This is just so she can get a feel for actual foods,” Molly reassured, placing it on the table in front of him with the four others.

Molly had suggested trying Miri on a few testers of solid food, though Harry didn’t see how it could be considered solid as Molly had pureed it to within an inch of its life. On the table in front of him was an assortment of mashed fruits, all in individual bowls. Banana, orange, plum, melon, and peach. Miri was gazing up at him, her mouth fastened against him as she was nursed.

“So, explain this to me again, how it works,” Harry said, detaching Miri to wind her and pulling down his shirt as Molly sat down next to him.

“You start her off with a normal nursing. Then, just before she’s finished, you stop and offer her some fruit. It’s just an introduction, not an actual feed.”

“This is just a taste, so she gets a feel for it. When do I actually start weaning her?” Harry asked.

“Four months, so now is a good time to try this. You start the actual weaning in four weeks. At this point, she’s starting to realize that there is actual food. You can see it by the way she keeps trying to get to your meals. If you start now, it’ll be easier to wean her when you try.”

Harry nodded and set Miri to his other breast. He fed her until she was almost finished and then detached her. She voiced a complaint, but she soon became interested in the brightly coloured bowls in front of her.

“Which one do I try first?” Harry asked, taking a plastic spoon from Molly.

“Up to you.”

He decided on the peach. He scooped up a tiny amount and fed it to her, her tiny tongue licking at it. She was still for a moment, sucking at the mush on her tongue before she babbled.

“I do it like that?” Harry asked. 

“Just like that. She probably won’t take more than a taste of each,” Molly advised and he reached for a clean spoon and the banana.

They went on, trying her on each of the fruits. She enjoyed the peach, plum and melon, but spit back the orange and banana, pulling a face. She only took a taste of each before she got bored and began to try and reach for the spoons. Molly praised him profusely as she cleaned up, Severus slipping from the room as silently as he had entered. Harry felt it had gone exceptionally well, so he rewarded himself with a chocolate bar and Miri with her favourite shiny gold stuffed snitch.

“You know what, baby?” Harry said to his daughter, holding her up so their eyes were level. “I think I’m getting the hang of this parenting stuff.”

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Sirius was terrified, Sam was on edge, but Remus was ecstatic. He had always wanted to carry his and Sirius’ child. In his mind, it was a miracle for him to have gotten pregnant. No one got half a miracle. He knew there were risks, but they were worth it if he got his baby.

He loved Harry, and adored Phoenix. He wouldn’t give them up for all the world, Wizarding or Muggle. But he wanted more. This baby was a blessing, and he intended to carry it through. 

Remus looked up to see Solarin sitting in one of the hard plastic chairs in the waiting area, thumbing worriedly through an old book he recognised as one from the library at home.

“Sol?” Remus called out and her head snapped up.

“Hi,” she said, slipping the book into her bag and moving towards them. “You all done then?”

“Yes. Were you waiting for us?” Sirius asked, confused as to why she was there.

“No, I’m waiting for Sam. I decided to make an appointment with him and he said he could fit me in today.”

“Ah. We could wait for you, if you like,” Remus offered and Sirius shot him a dirty look.

“We are going straight home, Remus, and don’t even think of arguing with me,” Sirius commanded and Remus sighed, nodding. 

“Are you all right?” Solarin asked.

“I’m fine,” Remus said, smiling.

“That is a matter of opinion,” Sirius added.

“I’m pregnant,” Remus said quickly, glaring at his husband.

Solarin looked stunned and was silent for a minute before she smiled at them. “Congratulations,” she said, her tone surprised. “When are you due?”

“February.”

“Well, that is big news.”

“Yes, it is, but he has to go home now,” Sirius said, shooting her a look that spoke volumes. Everything was not sunshine and roses with this happy news. “Only thing is, I’m not quite sure how we do that. We can’t use the floo or Apparate.”

“I suggest a taxi,” Sam said, making them jump. “Maybe Solarin would be kind enough to put you in one while I set up to see her?”

“Of course,” Solarin said, depositing her bag with Sam before she led them to the outside world, putting them in a black cab and telling the driver the street name. She even paid him upfront with some muggle money she had in her pocket.

Remus leaned against Sirius as the cab drove away, his hands resting on his sore abdomen.

“Siri, I want this,” Remus whispered. “I want this more than anything.”

“I know, honey. And I’m going to do everything in my power to get it for you.”

Sirius kissed the top of his head and slipped an arm around his shoulders, rubbing the top of his arm. His other hand came down to rest atop Remus’, their fingers entwining.

Sirius was his mate, his match in every way. Sirius would take care of him.

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Solarin made her way into Sam’s office and sighed in relief. The place looked more like a living room than a healers office. It was nice and comfortable. Sam smiled at her and she smirked. He was faking it. Sam always had projected. She blocked his thoughts. She didn’t need to hear how worried he was about Remus.

“Have a seat, Sol,” he said, motioning to a chair opposite him. She did as she was told and steeled herself for the interrogation. “So, what brings you here today? Is it just the check up, or is it some specific worry?”

“There is a specific something, but mostly just a check up. You’ve been sending me letters for months, I thought it was time I answered one,” she answered honestly.

“All right then. We’ll do the check, and then get down to the problem.” He pulled out a fresh pad of paper and reclined in his chair, watching her do the same. “So, how do you feel overall?”

“I feel pretty good. Mad-Eye sent you the reports of what’s been happening to me the last few months, right?”

“Yes, he did. I am fully aware of the whole picture,” Sam replied, making a note on his pad to look through those reports once more.

It was a tacit understanding that Moody kept him informed of everything new that Solarin developed. Any new behaviour or abilities, and anything out of the ordinary was reported to Sam. With a being like her, the slightest thing could cause problems. There was no record of any augur making it to their twenties, so she was a rarity to be kept a close eye on. That close eye required Moody, Dumbledore and Sam all being in close correspondence. Telling one of them something about her was as good as telling all three.

“How are you feeling now, what with the damage from the Ministry? Any lingering effects?” he asked as she shrugged off the tartan mans shirt she wore, revealing the black camisole underneath. His eyes lingered on her Brand. He had always considered it a barbaric practice, ever since she had come to him for pain relief after it had been burned into her skin and made permanent by magic, so it could never be removed, by any means.

“Nope, none. I feel just fine now.”

“Good, that’s very good. How are you handling Miri and her abilities? Is she interfering with yours at all?”

“Not really. She hitchhikes sometimes, but she seems to be growing out of doing that. She’s still a fledgling with it, so I’m not finding any problems.”

“And the connection with Bill, how is that?”

Sam had been the one Solarin had gone to in her early teens about sex. It had been a mortifying experience for Sam, having someone so young ask him about contraception, but he had admired her cool approach to that visit. She had handled it all like an adult, even making the appointment and arriving alone, and Sam had not seen a problem with helping her to protect herself. She was his patient and he had a duty to her care. Preventing pregnancy and infections was all part of that care. He just hoped Severus never found out about his involvement in it. Thank Merlin for confidentiality clauses.

“Normal.”

He smiled at her. “That is all very good to hear. Now, physically how do you feel?” he asked, noticing the tattoo on her abdomen as she reached for a biscuit. He briefly wondered what Severus made of it, and the nose ring. Severus had never seemed the type to take those kinds of things well.

He sniggered. She had always helped herself to his biscuits without him having to offer them, and he had been treating her for thirteen years. She had been a spunky little witch when she was younger, as far as he had seen, and he had enjoyed being her healer. She was one of the more easy to handle patients he had, despite her unique status. Well, formerly unique.

“I’m still not much of a sleeper, but it doesn’t cause any problems for me. Apart from that, all normal.”

“Boy, I wish all my patients said that,” he joked. “Makes my job so much easier.”

“Well, I like to be unusual. Keeps you on your toes,” she said, nibbling a chocolate chip cookie.

“And keep me on my toes you do. Now, are you all right with me doing an exam?”

“Yup. Just don’t tell Bill, he might get possessive,” she joked. Well, he assumed she was joking.

He laughed and followed her over to the bench, where she had to pull out the stool to actually make it up. He sniggered and she glared at him.

He completed the examination quickly, finding her a lot easier than Remus had been. She was a little fussy over her Brand, but she had always been, so he avoided it.

Solarin liked Sam’s method of healing. It was simple, muggle, and it was nice on her system. She had so much magic running through her body already, she didn’t need to be bombarded with a bunch of spells. Blowing something up was not on her agenda.

“Have you been attacked lately?” Sam asked as he drew blood. She had not even flinched at the needle stick. Definitely easier than Remus.

“No, why?”

“The marks,” he said, indicating her wounded shoulders with a nod as he taped down the cotton bud at her arm. 

She giggled. “Bill.”

“Ah, I see. All right, hop down and come join me, we’ll have some tea and a chat.”

She found herself sipping tea and trying not to laugh at how red Sam had gone. He had never been good at dealing with her sex life, but she found it charming. Not many healers could still blush.

“So, Bill remains the only sexual partner you’ve had, am I correct?” Sam asked, diving in headfirst. He had been a Gryffindor, that courage came in handy in his line of work.

“Yes. He’s my only one and I’m his. We never found anyone else we wanted to kiss, let alone screw.”

He laughed. “Good to know. And you are still using the Charm?”

“Yup. Still working, no babies.”

“And how many times a week are the two of you intimate?”

“Two or three. We get a little rough, as you’ve seen evidence of, so we need recovery days,” she said and he smiled.

Sam had never met Bill, but her descriptions of him over the years had put him firmly in Sam’s ‘good’ pile. Solarin needed a good man, someone who could fully appreciate her. Bill seemed to fit that description. Sam knew what Solarin’s father had done, Severus had informed him on her first visit, when his old secretary had amused her with dolls and colouring books. She had still been young enough to get some enjoyment out of them. She needed someone who adored her. Bill worshiped her and he brought out the best in her. He was firmly in Sam’s ‘good’ pile.

“How rough do you get?”

“Define that one,” she said.

“Bruising? Blood drawn? Broken bones?”

“Yes, yes and no.”

“What about internally? Have you ever…been…umm…damaged?” he said, his embarrassment of asking such a thing of the girl who used to draw him pictures of fairies for his office reaching a peak.

She laughed. “No, we’ve never gotten that rough. It’s more that we try to mark each other. You understand about the marking, right?”

He grinned, that not-so-blonde coming to his mind once more. “Yes, I understand marking perfectly. Bill seems to enjoy it thoroughly.”

“We both do. I usually end up looking worse, because I’m so pale.”

“You don’t cover the marks?” he asked out curiosity more than anything.

“No. I don’t see the need. It’s just a part of me and him, it’s what we do. Everyone in the house seems to be used to them. Severus is the only one still pretending that they don’t exist,” she said and he sniggered. “Bill’s brothers keep teasing me about them, so I think they’re cool with them.”

He nodded and put the pad aside, sipping at his tea and nibbling a custard cream. He performed a few diagnostic spells on her blood and smiled. “I can proclaim that you are in perfect health,” he said with a smile. “So, what’s your concern?”

She chewed her lower lip and Sam knew immediately that her concern was something big. So much for his theory of her visits being easy.

“I’m writing a book,” she began and then paused.

“That sounds like a good way to occupy your time. What are you writing about?” he prompted.

“Augurs.”

“I see.”

“Well, the thing is, I was doing research and I found this thing in one of the books I’m reading.”

“What did you find?”

“It says that no augur has ever had children.”

The silence hung between them. Sam had expected her concern to be about headaches, or a new facet of her abilities, or maybe even a problem in her sexual activities with Bill. He had not anticipated the question of children to come from her. 

He had assumed that he was done with talking about babies for the day. Why the hell did this family keep proving him wrong? It must just be something about the day.

“Is it something you and Bill are considering, having children?” Sam asked cautiously.

“We’ve talked about it. We want them, some day. Maybe not now, but we do want them. I just want to know if I can actually have them. I mean, I know that I’m the first augur to live past my teens, all the others before me have been killed. But they all reached ages where their periods would have started. They have all reached an age where they would be able to have children, yet there is no explanation as to why none of them ever did. They can’t all have died virgins,” she explained slowly, Sam watching her carefully, waiting for some kind of sign that she was not handling this subject well. “I just wondered if there was some physical reason why they didn’t have children. If maybe I might have problems.”

“Well, it is a consideration. I’ll tell you what, I could run some tests for you. I’ll be coming to your place twice a week during Remus’ pregnancy, I could bring you the results when I have them,” Sam suggested after a few moments careful thought.

She smiled, and it was like the sun breaking through the clouds.

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Remus tried so very hard not to laugh at the expressions of shock and disbelief on the faces of his family, but it wasn’t an easy task. Even Phoenix, who usually took things in her stride, was stunned. No one had said anything for a good twenty minutes now. He wondered how long they could stay that way.

“Ten sickles says they make it a full hour of silence,” Sirius whispered to him, leaning close.

“Twenty says less than ten minutes more and Molly speaks first,” Remus offered and Sirius smiled.

“How are you feeling?” 

It was the first time Sirius had asked that question since Sam had told them about the baby, but Remus knew it would not be the last time today he would be asked it.

“Fine. A little nauseated, but fine. I’m just glad Sam has stopped pressing on my stomach. I wasn’t quite sure what I wanted more, to rip him to shreds or to back myself into a corner,” Remus described honestly and Sirius pulled him in for a kiss.

“See? That is why I didn’t leave you alone in there. We’ll ask Severus for a potion for your nausea when he regains himself,” Sirius assured and Remus smiled.

They had arrived home and Sirius had all but shoved Remus into a chair at the table, fixing him with a glare and a barked order to stay there. They had then waited until everyone but Solarin had entered the room before delivering their news. 

“When they regain themselves, I need to go out and get something,” Sirius said.

“What do you need?”

“Just a book that’s mentioned in the booklet Sam gave me.”

“All right. Sirius, can I have some tea?” Remus asked, being a good boy and staying seated. Sam may not have been able to strap him to a bed without breaking regulations at this point, but Sirius was not above it. Sirius could, and would, strap him down for the next six months if he had to. Remus would be good. For now.

“Of course. Which one?” Sirius asked as he moved to the selection of teas they kept.

“Ginger, please.”

Remus considered all the orders Sam had given them and decided that the no sex rule was going to be the hardest one to follow as Sirius’ arse wiggled past him. Damn, he was not even allowed to jerk off. That was a bloody unfair rule. Maybe there was a loophole he could find. 

“That’s wonderful news for the two of you,” Molly said, dazed.

“Pay up,” Remus called across the kitchen and Sirius sniggered, paying Remus as he handed him his tea and reclaimed his seat.

“So, this is rare, right?” Harry asked.

“Very,” Sirius confirmed. He handed Harry the booklet Sam had given him and Harry began to thumb through it, Phoenix sliding closer to him so she could read it too.

“This is rather unexpected but congratulations to you,” Severus said. “Is there anything any of us can do to make this easier for you, Remus? I have heard that male gestations can be rather trying.”

“Well, the healer gave us a whole list of rules that I have to follow,” Remus offered, not realizing what he was unleashing with that simple statement.

“I’m going to nip out and get this book,” Sirius said and Remus nodded. Sirius kissed him on the cheek and made his way to the floo, pausing to hand Severus his notebook and showing him the page of rules.

“He has to follow them all without exception. I trust you to make sure of that while I’m gone, Severus,” Sirius said and Severus agreed immediately, peering at the page intently as he moved towards the glowering werewolf.

“Sirius, you are mean,” Remus called as he grabbed a handful of floo powder.

“I am, aren’t I? Even if he and I don’t get along, I know Severus won’t put up with you disobeying anymore than I will. I warned you I would do what it takes, Moony. You should learn to believe me.”

Remus made to stand up to argue with him, but Severus placed a hand on his shoulder and swiftly pushed him back into his seat.

“Sitting,” Severus said calmly, not taking his eyes off of the page.

Remus growled at Sirius’ smirk as he flooed out. It was going to be a very long pregnancy.

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Harry smirked as Severus pushed Remus back into his chair for the fourteenth time in twenty minutes. Remus looked like he wanted to hit him, but he restrained himself.

“Are you sure about this? This booklet makes it sound really dangerous,” Phoenix asked and Harry silently agreed.

“I am sure. I have the best possible care. Don’t worry so much, sweetie,” Remus reassured.

Solarin smirked as she entered the kitchen. “Telling her not to worry about the people she loves is like telling Voldemort not to hate muggles,” she put in, Phoenix blushing. Solarin stroked her hair, kissing the top of her head in greeting.

“How did your appointment go?” Remus asked as Bill kissed Solarin.

“Fine. It was just a check up. Sam’s just waiting on a few tests, so he’s going to bring them to me here when he has them,” she said, settling in a chair.

“Tests?” Severus asked worriedly, tearing his eyes from the page of rules. “What kind of tests?”

“Just routine. I haven’t been to see Sam for a few years, he’s just being thorough,” she reassured and Severus nodded, returning to his study. “So, why are you pinning Remus to the chair?”

Remus smiled at her hopefully, as if she could save him from her brothers clutches.

“Because of The Rules,” Harry supplied.

“What rules?”

Severus passed her the notebook and she read through the page. “I see,” she said, handing it back. “Did Sam set these?” Severus nodded. “Good luck, Remus. You’re going to need it.”

“I’m beginning to get that impression,” Remus grumbled, glaring at Severus as he sat down next to him with a hand lingering on Remus’ shoulder. “This is ridiculous. Sirius is overreacting.”

“Sirius is a smart wizard, and he paid very close attention to what your healer specified. He may not like rules but he will make you follow these ones. They are for your good and the good of your baby,” Arthur put in. Remus sighed and nodded, admitting defeat for the time being.

Sirius proved just how smart he was when he returned. 

Harry had known that his godfather was resourceful, the man had escaped Azkaban. He knew Sirius was very intelligent, he had to be, being married to Remus. He also knew full well that Sirius loved Remus and would do whatever it took to give Remus what he wanted. Sirius and Remus were the pair that would do anything for each other, and it was clear that Remus wanted this baby more than anything else.

So it shouldn’t really have surprised Harry when Sirius returned with more than just a book. Sirius Apparated into the hallway and lingered in the shadowy doorway, watching the scene with a raised eyebrow and a smirk. He shifted and Harry could see that his godfather was not alone.

Sirius returned with a woman. She was…squishy, it was the only way to describe her. She was about Harry’s height, which made her short, and had once been thin, but age had filled her out so now she looked like she was made of marshmallow. She had to have been in her sixties, Harry was pretty sure of that. She had grey hair, amber eyes, a wide kind smile and just had to be related to one grumpy werewolf currently bickering with Severus over The Rules.

“I told you, that rule is stupid! I’m not giving it up,” Remus insisted loudly, folding his arms over his chest for good measure. He looked more Harry’s age than his own, and Harry was hard pressed to stop his giggle, but he managed it.

“It is for your own good,” Severus persisted.

“I will not give in. You cannot have it.”

Severus huffed in annoyance. “If he does not give in, I am going to do something drastic,” Severus spat at no one in particular. Remus pulled a childish face at Severus and Harry thought he might die if he didn’t laugh soon.

“No drastic measures necessary. I brought reinforcements,” Sirius said smugly, moving into the room fully. He crossed his arms over his chest and sighed at his husband, shaking his head. “I’m gone less than an hour and you’re already pushing it.”

“What did you do?” Remus asked apprehensively. Sirius stepped aside and Remus gaped, the woman smiling at his surprise. Remus hung his head in his hands, hiding whatever he was feeling. “Hello, mum,” he said, looking up and smiling at her, a sudden excitement in his eyes.

“Hello, darling,” she said, and Severus pushed Remus back into his chair once more as he attempted to stand so he could hug her. Remus snarled at him in anger.

“Why have you brought me my mother, Sirius?” Remus asked as his mother moved over to him for the desired hug. He let himself lean against her, smiling at the way she smoothed his hair as his head rested against her stomach.

“Remus, I’m your mother. I’m going to come and help out when my child is having a baby. Besides, I couldn’t come and help when you adopted Harry and Phoenix, you wouldn’t let me, I want to help with this one and get to know the others in the process.” She beamed down at him. “Congratulations, darling,” Remus’ mother said and Remus smiled up at her.

“I brought her because you need to do as you are told. The best person I know for that job is your mother,” Sirius stated simply. “Besides, it saves you calling her and worrying about when she’ll arrive to fuss over you. She’s already descended. Now, which rule are we arguing about?” He dropped the heavy bag he had dragged in from the hallway. Mother Lupin would apparently be staying.

“He won’t surrender his wand,” Harry sniggered and Remus glared at him. Phoenix was red in the face from holding in her laughter and it didn’t help Harry to keep in his own.

“Remus John Lupin-Black, give it to me,” said Remus’ mother firmly and Remus actually pouted. She held out her hand, the other perched on her hip, and he hid his wand behind his back.

“Mum, I won’t use it, I promise. Just let me keep it,” Remus argued, his eyes pleading.

“No, give it to me.”

“But mum…”

“Don’t you ‘but mum’ me. You will give it to me or I will wrestle it from you, and don’t think I won’t wrestle a pregnant man.”

At this, Harry lost his battle, dissolving into peals of laughter, he and Phoenix collapsing onto each other as Remus glared at them.

“I find it very rude for you to laugh at your father,” he said crossly, but it only made them laugh harder.

“They laugh at Sirius all the time,” Ron put in, winding Joseph.

“Ha ha, very funny,” Sirius said. “Give it to her, Remus.”

“Give it up, Remus. She’s going to take it, whether you like it or not,” Ginny put in and Remus gave one last futile pleading look to Sirius before he surrendered his wand, hanging his head.

“Good boy. Now, are you going to introduce me to your family, or do I have to do it myself?” she said as she pocketed his wand and Sirius grinned, taking the chair Severus vacated. Harry excused himself as the baby monitor flared to life and by the time he returned to the kitchen with Miri, he was the only one left to be introduced.

“Harry, this is my mother, Mrs. Anne Lupin,” Remus introduced and Harry found himself suddenly wary of the new face. “Mum, this is Harry.”

“Hello, Harry. Remus and Sirius have told me so much about you,” she said kindly and Harry chewed his lower lip.

He nodded to her, trying not to be rude, and Severus pulled him into his lap, stroking his back.

“Did I say something wrong?” Anne asked quietly and Sirius shook his head. “Is this one of the reasons I had to stay away?”

“Yes, mum. Harry has a few…lingering quirks,” Remus explained softly and she nodded in understanding.

Harry buried his head in Severus’ shoulder and clutched Miri tighter to him as Sirius offered to take her while he settled himself. This was new, this reluctance to let go of her. He had never felt this before. What was going on?

Severus looked from Anne to Harry in confusion. Harry wasn’t like this anymore, he hadn’t been this unsure of himself for months. It didn’t seem to be Anne that was the problem, she had done nothing to have caused this, it was something else. Harry had been fine with Anne before he went to get Miri.

“Severus?” Remus questioned.

Severus waved him off and pulled Harry away from him slightly, enough to see his face. Harry’s green eyes were watering, and his face was bloodless. He was gnawing on his lower lip so hard he had drawn blood and he was drenched in a cold sweat. He was gripping Miri tightly to him, the little girl flush against his chest. She was whimpering for him, expressing what he couldn’t while he shook uncontrollably.

“What’s wrong, love?” Severus asked softly.

“Nothing. I’m just feeling a little nervous, like I did in the beginning,” Harry whispered.

“Do you know why?” Severus requested. He approached this sudden regression with caution, and Harry marvelled at him knowing exactly what to ask, exactly what to say.

“No. It just happened. But…it…I…it’s the…Severus…I…Monday is…it’s August,” he mumbled, struggling to find a way to explain it. He was just grateful that Severus could always figure out what Harry was getting at, and he wasn’t disappointed this time.

Severus nodded and smiled, smoothing his hair away from his forehead and kissing his scar. “I understand now, Harry. We knew this month was going to be difficult for you. It’s all right, I’ll explain it for you,” Severus reassured.

Harry nodded. “I just need a minute to get back on track. I didn’t mean to be rude to Mrs. Lupin,” Harry said softly, embarrassed.

“You weren’t rude, love. Anne understands. Just take the time you need. You can give her a proper greeting when you are ready.”

Harry nodded and nestled against Severus’ chest, taking slow deep breaths.

Severus looked up at the rest of the room. “It is August. On the third, it will be the first anniversary of the bad things,” he explained diplomatically, and they nodded. They talked amongst themselves as Harry regained his calm.

The conversation started up around him, mostly Anne laying down the law to Remus, but Harry tuned it all out. He focussed on Severus’ heartbeat in his ear, the feel of Severus stroking his back, Miri’s tiny weight in his arms. He was safe, he was home.

“It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Lupin,” Harry mumbled, looking at the cheery witch. Well, he assumed she was a witch. It hit him that he knew nothing of Remus’ parents. This was legally his grandmother, and he knew nothing of her.

“It’s very nice to meet you too, Harry, but please, call me Anne. We’re family now,” she insisted and he smiled shakily at her. She nodded at Miri. “She is precious.”

Harry looked down to find Miri had somehow been turned around to face the room and she was gazing around with big green eyes, sucking on her thumb.

“Such a beautiful baby,” Anne cooed.

“Thank you. Her name is Miri.”

“A remarkable name, but I like unusual names, as you may have noticed,” she joked, stroking Remus’ arm. “I always found Anne to be such a boring name, so many women are called Anne. I like a name that’s rare.”

“It means mine,” Harry supplied, trying to be polite and make up for his paltry first greeting. “Miri is mine, so she has a name that means mine.”

“How clever,” she praised, smiling at Miri. 

“Her full name is quite a mouthful,” Sirius supplied, helping Harry out of his nervousness by pitching in.

“What is it?” Anne asked enthusiastically. Obviously, Remus had inherited his thirst for knowledge from his mother. It was kind of like talking to an older version of Hermione.

“Miri Solarin Lily Potter-Snape,” Severus reeled off, Miri turning her head towards him at the sound of her name from her daddy. He smiled at her, and pulled one of her stuffed mermaids out of his pocket, transferring it to her tiny fist. “Solarin is after my sister, and Lily is after Harry’s mother. Double barrel surname, like your son has.”

“Quite a mouthful, but very pretty. How old is she?”

“She will be three months on the fifth,” Harry provided. Miri gurgled and waved the tiny toy around, showing it off to them all, before she shoved it to her mouth, gumming it to death.

Anne nodded and smiled, Harry feeling himself begin to relax. By the time conversation about dinner started he felt relaxed enough to give Miri to Severus, but only for a few minutes as he went to the bathroom.

“Why is there such a disagreement over dinner?” Remus asked, Anne attempting to flatten his wavy hair.

“Because you cannot eat anything that has been prepared magically. It must be prepared the muggle way, and Molly, our primary chef, has never been taught to cook in such a manner,” Severus explained.

Anne offered to cook, but everyone shot down that idea. It was her first night in the house, they didn’t feel right about it. Solarin offered, but no one heard her over Remus and Sirius bickering about why the no sex rule was needed, mortifying their children in the process. Everyone else drowned them out, trying to figure out what to do. They argued back and forth before Solarin lost her temper.

“Enough! I will cook,” she said firmly.

“For all of us? That’s a lot of people, Sol,” Sirius said, trying to be nice, and she shot him a look that could kill.

“Are you implying that I can’t handle one meal?” she asked, her voice like ice. He began to shake under her accusing stare.

“N-no, of course not…I was just…I…” he stuttered, grabbing Remus’ hand. He never had gotten over being the target of her temper.

Bill laughed. “Relax, everyone. She’s not going to Force Recall on Sirius,” he said, smiling at his seething girlfriend. “She’s picking up anger from someone else, it’s clouding her.”

“Who?” Remus asked, looking around at all the apparently calm, if a little confused, people. “No one seems that angry.”

“Put your barriers up, Arin,” Bill said and she went unnaturally still for a moment before she smiled, her thundercloud expression fading immediately.

“Sorry, everyone. I didn’t even realize they were down,” she apologised.

“Do you know who the anger was coming from?” Severus asked.

“It wasn’t anger. It was worry,” she clarified lightly.

“Who from?” Bill asked.

“That is not my place to say,” she replied diplomatically and Harry wondered who’s it could have been. He missed the guilty look on Sirius’ face and the glance Solarin gave the Animagus.

Harry looked around the table as Solarin asked for volunteers to help with dinner, something Remus jumped at, but he was outvoted by everyone so he remained at the table. Harry couldn’t figure out who’s worry it was that she had displayed. It must have been pretty powerful for her to react so strongly to it. It had been too powerful for Miri to deal with, the tiny girl simply gurgling at Severus teasing her with her stuffed dragon.

Harry stroked Miri’s dark corkscrew curls as Anne relented a little and allowed Remus to peel potatoes. While he sat at the table. With the constant watch of Harry.

“This is silly, mum,” Remus complained as she set the vegetables and a saucepan in front of him.

“No, this is following The Rules,” she countered, setting down a peeler and a bag for the waste. He rested his head on his hand, his elbow on the table as he picked at the wood. She sighed and sat down next to him. “Remus, darling, are you sure that this is what you want? You have two beautiful children already, and this strictness over your daily life is only going to get worse as you go on,” she asked, her hand on his arm. He looked at her, putting everything he was feeling into his gaze.

“I know, mum. I know I have Harry and Nixie, and I wouldn’t give them up for all the world. I love my children. But I want this baby too. Mum, I’ve never wanted anything so badly,” he admitted in a whisper. Everyone else was bustling around the kitchen, being ordered about by Solarin. Harry was the only one still sitting at the table, and that was only because Miri had demanded to be fed and because someone was needed to keep an eye on Remus. Anne and Sirius had insisted on someone watching him. Harry pretended not to hear his father as he poured out his heart. It was a private moment, like when he talked to Severus.

She took a deep breath and rubbed his back, smoothing his hair and forcing him to look at her with her free hand, stroking his cheekbone with her thumb. 

“Then you must do as you are told. If you want this, and I don’t doubt that you do, you need to take care of yourself. Sam wouldn’t have set these restrictions on you if they weren’t necessary,” she said firmly, but her tone was soft. “Baby, I know that you have this belief that this will all go smoothly. But you need to realize that there are real risks.”

“I do realize,” he confirmed.

“Then be a good boy and follow The Rules.”

He smiled at her. “I will, mum. I’m just going to have a little trouble adjusting to living like this. I’ve been independent for a while now, this is going to take some fine-tuning.”

“All right, I will let you be pernickety with them for a day or two, while you fine-tune. Now, those potatoes are not going to peel themselves, young man,” she said, raising her volume as she stood up.

“I’m not a young man anymore, mum,” Remus said, smiling at her retreating back.

“You will always be my baby, darling, young man and anything else I choose to call you, no matter how old you get or how many children you have. You are still my sweet little wolf,” she called over her shoulder and Remus grinned as he set about the potatoes, chatting contentedly with Harry.

Sirius leaned close to his mother-in-law, smiling at her. “Thank you again for coming, Anne. He may be acting difficult, but he really is glad you’re here,” he said quietly, a hand on her back, but she silenced him with a hand to his chest.

“Nonsense, Sirius. My boy is having a baby, I’m going to be here. And I know how much my son loves to be mothered, even if he won’t admit it. But I hope you realize that the two of you only managed to keep me away for so long because of Harry’s troubles. I have grandchildren now, I’m not missing out on another minute. I waited a long time to be a nana, I want to know your children,” she insisted and he rubbed her back in acceptance, smiling. “Though, I will leave you two in peace when this is over,” she added in a whisper with a sly wink and Sirius blushed.

Harry decided that he quite liked Anne Lupin. Not only had she convinced Remus to follow The Rules, she had made Sirius blush.

And if her being here meant that Remus got the baby he had always wanted, Harry loved having a grandmother.

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Life became very settled by the following morning. Anne seemed to bring with her a calm atmosphere to the house that not even Fred and George could dispel when they had arrived for dinner the first night of her stay. She soon allied herself with Molly and Solarin, the matriarchs of the family, and together they set about implementing changes in the house.

All meals were now done by hand, Anne and Solarin showing Molly how to do it without magic. All laundry was done by hand as well, the three women determined to make the transition as easy as possible for Remus. Nothing washed using magic could touch his skin, and he could not eat or drink anything prepared by magic. It was rather like caring for the family as a muggle, and Solarin enjoyed herself tremendously. 

Remus had an armchair in the living room and a padded chair in the kitchen, all set up so he knew exactly where to sit. 

Severus set about brewing him nutrient potion by the cauldron full, and an anti nausea potion he made to the instructions that were specified in the booklet Sam had given Sirius.

The booklet became the bible of the house. Everything was done to the specifications of the book, and it was referenced by everyone in the house on how to ensure Remus was within The Rules. Phoenix spent her Saturday evening writing out The Rules on a large sheet of paper, which was then pinned up in the kitchen so it was a quick reference for all the family. She decorated it with an illustration for each of The Rules. For the rule of Remus sitting as much as possible, she drew a picture of a chair that wriggled across the parchment. For the one of no magic, she drew a picture of Remus being relieved of his wand by Anne. Everyone found the drawings amusing, even Remus.

Sirius did add his own rule to all the ones Sam had given them. He insisted that Remus was escorted everywhere, just so he could be kept an eye on. Remus didn’t argue with this one. In Remus’ mind, it was the only thing Sirius was really demanding for himself in all this. Sirius was letting him go ahead with the pregnancy, and Remus couldn’t thank him in bed, the least he could do was give him his own rules.

By the time Remus actually woke at nine on Sunday morning, all the changes had been made. 

His breakfast and potions were brought to him in bed by Phoenix, who had insisted on being the one to deliver them. 

He was then escorted to the bathroom by Sirius, who sat on the closed lid of the toilet and talked to him while he took a bath. Sirius refused to let him have his usual shower, claiming he was sitting in a bath so he would damn well live with it or go without. Remus had not complained about the bath after that, but the no sex rule got that much harder to obey as Sirius followed his suggestion and took a shower while he bathed. He had been forced to picture Harry and Severus having sex to dispel his fierce hard-on, and subsequently brought on a bout of vomiting. 

He was then allowed to go downstairs to the kitchen, where Anne made him tea and Sirius brought him his papers for his new book. Remus spent his Sunday working on his book and talking with people who drifted in and out of the room. Lunch and dinner were family affairs, all the members of the house sitting down together to eat. After dinner, they all retired to the living room, where Remus was sat in his armchair. 

He stopped complaining and testing the bonds and Sirius seemed to relax. As they slipped into bed that night, Remus found he had no trouble at all drifting off, something of a rarity for him. Remus found this new way of life was, strangely, like being a little boy again, and he revelled in it. Sirius adored it too, his own mother had never cared about him.

It was quite a pleasant day, really. Well, mostly.

Phoenix had taken to Anne like a duck to water, the older woman loving being a grandmother to the littlest witch of the Lupin line. Phoenix had helped Anne clean, cook, wash and dry, taking it all in, glued to Anne like a limpet. Solarin had seemed a little put out by being tossed aside as the girls teacher, but Bill had soon smoothed her ruffled feathers. Phoenix had never had a grandmother before, it was only natural that she would take the experience and milk it for all it was worth.

Harry, however, had not warmed to Anne. He liked her, but it was just not the right time for him to deal with a new face. He was anxious and jumpy the whole day, refusing to let anyone near Miri, even Severus. It was the day before the anniversary and Harry could not eat, his stomach was too tied in knots. Harry withdrew almost completely from all interactions with everyone, including Severus. 

This, unfortunately, led to Sirius losing his temper during dinner.

“If you can’t take care of my godson, Severus, then leave!” Sirius snapped as Harry once again refused to eat. As far as anyone was aware, Harry had not eaten anything all day, no matter who had tried persuading him.

“I will thank you to keep your nose out,” Severus replied calmly, but his voice held bite, enough to warn Sirius that he was on dangerous ground. Sirius ignored the warning and ploughed on.

“This is my godson we’re talking about! I care about him a damn sight more than you do, Snivellus!”

“Sirius, sit down,” Remus said, tugging at Sirius’ shirt. He was ignored and Anne was quick to placate him when he tried to stand to deal with his husband. “This withdrawal is not Severus’ fault, you know that.”

“Really? Then who is to blame?” Sirius snarled, his eyes fixed on the Potions Master. 

Severus remained calm, even through the use of his hated nickname from school. Harry was not doing well with the confrontation, and he would do even worse if Severus were to rise to the bait. Harry was completely withdrawn now, not allowing anyone to touch him. He would not make eye contact and he had stopped talking all together. He was sitting in the chair closest the door, staring at the table and clutching a sleeping Miri to him. He had not even put her in her crib for her naps, and had somehow managed to go the whole day holding her, including his trips to the bathroom, though no one was quite sure how he had managed those.

“Think about what you say next, Black. Think about the consequences of it before you open your mouth,” Severus warned, trying to protect his fragile husband from the inevitable. His venomous reply was on the tip of his tongue, but he refrained. Now was not the time.

“I do bloody think! I think every single fucking day about how that bastard Lucius Malfoy raped and tortured my godson! He doesn’t seem much better right now than when we first got him back, so what was the point in you claiming him?” Sirius hissed angrily.

It was a red flag for Harry. He clutched Miri closer to him and bolted from the room, half running to the garden. It was a sweltering evening, but there was a light breeze and it was instantly easier to breathe. He could hear the yelling from the open kitchen window and gasped at the insults being thrown by his godfather and his husband.

He should have known that their truce wouldn’t last forever. Six months had been a long time, he supposed as he sat down on the grass. He lay Miri down and curled around her, watching her squirm and whine, not understanding the emotions she was picking up from him. 

“No, sweetheart. No look, no see,” Harry murmured to her and she obeyed, upping her fragile barriers. They were getting stronger every time she used them, and it was much easier for her to block things now. She was still having trouble with a lot, but she was getting there. It helped that she was obedient to the command. He rewarded her with a kiss on her cheek and lay there, watching her drift back to sleep.

Why couldn’t Sirius understand? It wasn’t Severus, it was Harry. These were Harry’s issues, and nothing anyone said could help him now.

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Remus sighed as his husband carried on trading verbal abuse with his son-in-law. Severus was retaliating now that Harry had left the room, and it had gotten really spiteful between the two. Remus didn’t care, at this point, if Sirius realized he was being unreasonable. Actually, downright irrational was a better description. All Remus cared about was that his cub had just sped from the room, pale and shaking, holding Miri as if his life depended upon it.

Remus turned to his mother, who was sitting to his left. Sirius had been on his right, but now he was chest to chest with Severus in front of the sink, both of them oblivious to everything now. Everyone else was staring at them, some managing to still eat their pie and mash while watching the showdown.

“Mum, could you cast a locator charm for Harry, find out where in the house he is hiding?” Remus asked. She nodded and pulled out her wand, casting the requested spell. The result showed Harry was in the garden.

“Do you want me to try and break them up?” Anne asked, motioning to the warring pair.

“No. I want you to take me to Harry seeing as I can’t go on my own. They’ll burn themselves out before too long and I need to see if my son is all right.”

Anne escorted her son to the open garden door, where Remus paused. Harry was lying on his side on the grass, curled around Miri. She heard Remus sigh sadly before he had her walk him over. He sat down on the grass on Miri’s other side.

“Thank you, mum.”

Harry didn’t look up as Remus joined him. Anne moved off to the stage at the end of the garden and sat down, waiting. They hadn’t gotten around to removing the stage yet, or bringing the instruments inside. There was silence in the garden for a long time. Remus didn’t say anything, nothing at all, and Harry peeked up to find Remus looking up at the stars.

Remus looked up and sighed. He could see the constellation Orion, his idiot husbands middle name. Remus wasn’t quite sure how to handle Harry when he was like this. Unlike Severus, Remus had never witnessed behaviour like this from the Gryffindor, not to this extent. Plus, it was usually Sirius who parented Harry, if he needed parenting. Remus was better at handling Phoenix. However, Sirius seemed to be…occupied so Remus would be the one to step in. This withdrawal from Harry made Remus hate Lucius for what he had done to his formerly fearless, slightly awkward, cub. But hatred of Lucius was not going to help just now. Remus decided to talk about something neutral. Harry would talk back when he was ready.

Silence fell from the open kitchen window. It seemed they were done tearing chunks out of each other. Time for apologies then.

“Prat,” Remus muttered.

Harry remained silent, but gave the werewolf a glance of question.

“I’m talking about my husband, not yours,” Remus clarified. “He’s always been the same, shoots off with his mouth and then has to grovel later. He is very good at his grovelling now, so much practice.”

Remus laid back in an apparent move to get a better look at the constellations, putting one arm under his head. 

“That one is Sirius,” Remus said, pointing upwards. Harry shifted and looked up at the sky, locating the star he was referring to. “The Dog Star. Rather appropriate for an Animagus that looks like a Grim.”

As he said it, a certain canine came out to them, his tail between his legs. He licked at Remus’ pointing hand and Remus shoved him off.

“Coward,” Remus said, Snuffles whining and covering his snout with his paw. “Have you apologised to Severus in human form?”

Snuffles bowed his head. It was obviously the signal for yes, because Remus sighed. 

“You were completely out of line. Go sit with mum.” Snuffles whined in complaint but Remus did not relent, shoving his flank. “Go. You obviously cannot talk to a human being without cocking it up. Go.”

Snuffles went off, his tail between his legs, his head downcast. He laid at Anne’s feet, the woman glaring disapprovingly at him, and rested his head on his front paws.

“Is your mum a witch?” Harry whispered after another interval of lengthy silence. “I haven’t seen her cast a spell, and I haven’t seen her with a wand.”

“Yes. She’s Muggleborn, much like your own mother,” Remus answered, playing along with Harry’s line of questioning.

It took quite a while, their conversation. It was still early enough that Remus was able to ignore his fatigue for the time being, but he could only last so long. He prayed that this was Harry opening up. He didn’t want to fall asleep on him.

“How long until they catch him?” Harry mumbled eventually.

Remus didn’t need to ask who Harry was talking about. “I don’t know, pup. I wish I could tell you.”

“Sirius is a prat. He shouldn’t have said those things to Severus.”

Remus sighed. “I know, and so does he. He’s worried, Harry, so he took it out on the first target that caught his eye. That happened to be Severus,” Remus explained.

“I don’t mean to worry anyone,” Harry said. “It’s just…it’s hard…right now…for me to…to…be me.”

“He’s not just worried about you, cub. He’s worried about me, too. Sam didn’t do much to sing the virtues of male pregnancy,” Remus admitted.

“So there are big risks?”

“Yes, there are. Which is why I have The Rules. It’s why Sam is going to check on me twice a week. I have the best possible care.”

Harry actually looked him in the eye, and Remus took it as a very very good sign. Someone was shifting in the doorway above their resting heads and Remus had a suspicion it was Severus. He wondered how long he had been there. Probably since Snuffles came out. The man kept his distance for the time being. Remus marvelled at his ability to handle Harry so well, silently reminding himself that Severus had been handling things like this for eight months now.

Harry peered at his adoptive father, measuring him. With all that was going on, his parents probably would not handle the anniversary of his abduction well. But he had to give them the chance to try. He summoned all his Gryffindor courage and took a deep breath.

“I’m not going to be good, and I don’t know how long it will last,” Harry warned, his voice shaky but he didn’t stutter, which he felt very pleased about. It was better than the first time he had been this bad. “It won’t be nice for you to watch. Severus will probably get strict with me again, he’ll have to. If you can’t handle me like this, I’ll stay in my room until it passes.”

“I can handle it, pup. Just tell me what to do,” Remus assured.

Harry considered it, thinking back to what was essential the last time he was like this. 

“Don’t touch me. Or Miri. I probably won’t let anyone else hold her but me, so no one should ask or try and take her from me. The last time, she was still inside me, no one could touch her without my permission. Think of her like that while I’m like this, think of her as my baby bump again. I won’t talk very much, if I talk at all. It’s not likely that I’ll look anyone in the eye, so don’t take it personally. I’ll probably bolt when your healer arrives, but I don’t know for sure on that one. I’ll cry a lot, so it’s best if Sol doesn’t drop her barriers. And the last time I was like this I was verbally self-abusive. I said a lot of nasty things about myself that will be horrible to listen to if I start up with it again. My advice is to let Severus handle it all, he’s good at it.” He paused. “I’m sorry it won’t be you I turn to first. I love you guys, I do. But I need Severus at times like this.”

Remus was impressed by how well Harry had reeled it all off. He was startlingly honest about what they should expect. Maybe the fearless boy Lucius had almost destroyed was still in there.

“Is there anything else I should know?” Remus asked.

“It’s probably best if all the Silencing Charms in the house come down while I’m bad. I used to shatter the ones at Spinners End when I had the dreams, the really bad ones in the beginning.” Harry remembered all too well how often Severus had to recast those spells. It had been pretty pointless, but Severus had insisted on them though he hadn’t revealed why. “Don’t mention his name, the blonde bastard. It’ll be like the first visit you had with me, but more extreme, just try and think back to that and you’ll get a rough idea of this. What I was like today is just the beginning. I’m going to get worse before I get better,” Harry cautioned.

Remus sighed, taking it all in. He glanced at his mother, to find that she was taking notes. Oh, she really was loving being able to do her grandmother bit. “I hope you’re getting all this,” he called to her and she grinned sheepishly.

He stared at Harry. Harry was wearing a long sleeved turtleneck shirt, so Remus couldn’t see the scars on his wrists, on his arms, his hands, his neck. He knew there were more, that Harry was covered in them, that there was barely an inch of skin, apart from his face, that was clear of scarring. He had seen them when Harry had given birth, and Harry had let him have a closer look at them. They were pretty extreme, as scars went, but they didn’t worry him as much as the emotional ones Harry had. They were the ones that were still causing problems.

“I can handle it, Harry. And I will make Sirius shut his trap. By the time breakfast rolls around, everyone in the house will be warned. If there’s anything else you need, or want, or think I should know about, tell me,” Remus offered and Harry sucked at his lower lip, thinking.

“I’m happy for you about the baby,” Harry said eventually. “I wanted you to know now, so you know that I don’t feel like you’re pushing me out or anything like that. I might not show it while I get worse, but I am happy for you. I don’t feel like I’m being replaced, or that I was just a substitute for this kid. You worked too hard to adopt me for it to be like that. You love me and Nixie and this baby all the same. I’m your boy, I know that. So, no matter how nasty I get about myself, I don’t have any of that sibling rivalry crap. I just want you to be clear on that.”

Remus smiled. He had worried that his children would become defensive at the news of the baby, that they would feel like he was replacing them or something along those lines. Nixie had displayed nothing but excitement, plying he and Sirius with questions, but Harry had been troubling him. Harry was the more fragile of the two, he was the one most likely to pull away during this pregnancy. He felt himself relax as Harry made his little assurance. He wanted to hug Harry, but if it was like the first visit, it would not be welcome. So he stretched out his hand over Miri, smiling at his cub as Harry grasped his fingers lightly for a moment.

“I know that, pup. All right, I’ll leave you be now,” Remus said. “Just one more thing. Sirius Orion Lupin-Black! Get your arse over here right this instant! And come as a human, you mangy mutt!”

Harry watched as Snuffles transformed into Sirius and walked over, sitting down by Remus’ feet. He looked incredibly guilty, and Harry didn’t blame him. But Harry loved the way Remus was scolding him like a child. It was nice and normal. It made him feel a bit better.

“I know you were listening, Sirius,” Remus said firmly, remaining on his back as he glared at his husband. “Is there anything you missed?”

“No. I got it all, and Anne took lots of notes,” Sirius said contritely.

“Good. Now, you are going to apologise to Harry, and make it a good one. No half arsed attempts. A full apology, Sirius, you owe him one.”

Sirius sighed and made to touch Harry’s leg but a warning cough from Remus had him stopping. He folded his hands to keep them busy and looked at Harry with earnest eyes.

“I’m so very sorry, Harry. I was way out of line. I shouldn’t have said what I did. I was wrong, and I shouldn’t have done it. I understand why you’re like this, and I shouldn’t have blamed Severus for it. I didn’t mean it, pup. Severus takes wonderful care of you, I’m just being a prat, as usual,” Sirius said slowly, pleadingly. “Forgive me?”

Harry stared at him for the longest thirty seconds of Sirius’ life before he stretched out his hand, letting Sirius tickle his fingers briefly before he pulled his hand back, resting it on Miri’s belly. 

“What am I forgiving you for, the fight or being a prat?” Harry whispered and Sirius smiled his decidedly doggy smile.

“The fight. I have no chance of ever being forgiven for being an insufferable prat,” Sirius joked and Harry gave him a shaky half smile.

“Right then. Do you want to be alone now, Harry? Do you want us to go away?” Harry nodded. “Mum, we’re going in, Harry needs time alone,” Remus said, sitting up, Anne walking over to them. Sirius helped him to his feet and cast Harry a worried glance before the three of them made their way inside, Severus leaning back to let them pass.

Harry lay there with Miri as he heard Severus make his way over. He claimed Remus’ place on the grass and laid down on his side, his eyes level with the bright green ones of his husband. Harry didn’t look at him, his eyes fixed on the sleeping child between them, and Severus sighed.

Severus had been aware that this time of year would be difficult for Harry, but he hadn’t anticipated the change in him being this rapid. It had taken Harry less than a day to start regressing, and less than two to almost reach the place he began from. Harry wasn’t yet as bad as he had been in the early weeks, but he would be by the morning, Severus could see that now. And he knew exactly how to handle Harry when he was like this.

“Look at me, Potter,” Severus said firmly and the emerald orbs met his stare immediately. “Harry, we are going to go back to some of my rules, the ones you had at the beginning and some new ones. I will not be argued with on these, just like last time.”

“What rules do I have?” Harry asked eagerly, latching onto this immediately, though his voice was still shaky.

Severus suppressed his smile. Harry needed him to be firm right now, he needed Severus to take control once more. Time for a little of Scary Professor Snape to come forth, but only a little. He didn’t want to terrify Harry, that would be counterproductive.

“Rule one, you will attend and attempt to eat all three meals,” Severus said and Harry nodded. It was one Harry was most used to. In the early weeks, Severus had been forced to keep repeating this rule to Harry at virtually every meal. Harry knew it by heart.

“Okay, I’ll try to eat.”

“Rule two, I am going to put you back on potions with breakfast. You are going to take a nutrient potion, like Remus, and a dose of your calming draught. You will take these for as long as I deem it compulsory. You will start taking them tomorrow morning, plus any additional potions I see fit during the day. I will not have you waste away or suffer unnecessarily.”

“I’ll be good, I’ll take them.”

“Rule three, you will give me Miri during your trips to the bathroom. I know you do not want to, but you cannot relieve yourself and hold her, she is no longer your bump. How on earth you managed it today, I have no idea, but it will not continue. You will give her to me when you go to the bathroom, and I will hold her. I will not give her to anyone, nor allow anyone to take her. When you return, I will give her back to you. Am I understood, Harry?”

Harry could see the reasoning behind this rule, and the logic of it. He didn’t like it, but his husband was giving him rules, giving him what he needed right now. He could give him Miri while he peed. 

“I understand,” Harry said. “I’ll give her to you while I pee.”

“Finally, rule four. You must talk to me. It is the rule you disliked the most in the beginning but it is needed. You will talk to me, just like when we started. You do not have to talk to anyone else if you do not want to, but you will talk to me,” Severus instructed and Harry sighed, but he did nod.

“How long will I be like this?” Harry asked.

“I do not think you will suffer like this for more than a few days, Harry, if that,” Severus answered honestly. “In my reasoning, I do not believe you will be like this much past tomorrow, but I will not guarantee that as I cannot be sure, so we will say a few days, just to be on the safe side. If we are lucky, this will burn itself out before lunch tomorrow.” Harry nodded, gnawing at his thumbnail.

Severus sighed. He really did not want to ask his next question, but with Harry changing so rapidly, he had to be clear on everything before Harry dissolved completely. Harry had told Remus not to touch him. How far did that go? “If you want, I can sleep in one of the spare rooms for the time being, while you deal with this.”

“No! Please, Severus, I don’t want that. Please?” Harry begged, panicked.

“All right, I will sleep with you. It was only a suggestion, love. Now, what do you want from me for the duration of this bad period?”

“What do you mean?”

“Do you want me to refrain from touching you like the others? Or would you rather I was your anchor again?”

Harry considered it. “I don’t know. Right now, I want my anchor. But I don’t know how bad I’m going to be tomorrow, I don’t know what I’ll want then,” Harry admitted.

Severus reached out his hand and felt Harry grasp it, bringing it to the crook of his neck. Severus rubbed soothing circles with his fingertips, stroking Harry’s throat with his thumb, and Harry’s eyes fluttered closed with a sigh. 

Harry reached out his own arm, settling his hand on Severus’ ribs. “This is going to be bad, isn’t it?” Harry whispered, keeping his eyes closed as he basked in the gentle touch that could sweep away anything difficult to handle.

“Yes, love, it is. But I am right here. You can fall apart. I will catch you and put you back together, just like last time,” Severus reassured.

Harry smiled. 

His husband, his lover, his friend. Severus, Harry’s hero.

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Harry rolled over in his sleep, wincing at the pain that shot through his lower abdomen. He swam into consciousness and immediately had the desire to be sick. He cracked open his eyes and groaned at the pain. He sat up and put on his glasses, glancing at his watch which he had forgotten to take off. 

It was two in the bloody morning.

And bloody was right.

Harry pulled away the sheet to get up and pee, and found himself sitting in a pool of blood. What the hell was happening? Where was it all coming from? Harry gasped at the pain, trying not to make any noise. He stayed calm. He couldn’t be dying, could he? He didn’t feel faint, so he probably wasn’t dying, but he still felt fear grip at him. He groaned at the pain as it hit him again.

Oh God, what would his friends think? Suddenly haemorrhaging without reason in the middle of the night was not normal. What if someone looked closer at him? What if they figured it out?

He wasn’t sure what was worse, the nausea or the pain. He had to do something, he knew that one clear enough, but what? How the hell did he deal with this, whatever this was?

“Harry?”

Oh God, he had woken Ron. He should have known that Ron wouldn’t sleep through him groaning and gasping in pain. How long had he been making noise? Had he been doing it in his sleep? Ron woke with him for every nightmare, sitting with him while he calmed himself. None of the other boys woke to him any more, but Ron did. But he couldn’t let Ron see all this blood. It wasn’t normal, Ron would go and get a teacher, Harry would have to deal with being different than other boys, with everyone knowing. They’d all hate him, they’d think he was disgusting, just a freak, like Aunt Petunia had always said he was.

The curtains of his four poster bed were cautiously drawn back and Harry yanked the sheet up to hide the mess, but it was too late, Ron had already seen it. Ron looked shocked and worried for a moment, before he realized that Harry was conscious, so he wasn’t bleeding to death.

Ron didn’t say anything, he just pulled the sheet down again, gazing at the pool Harry was sitting in.

“Where’s it coming from?” Ron asked firmly, pulling his wand and spelling the mess away. 

Harry shrugged. 

“Have you hurt yourself? Harry, have you done something silly?” Ron demanded, shaking Harry’s shoulder.

“I…I don’t…don’t know where it’s coming from,” Harry whispered, feeling more ashamed than he had ever felt. “I haven’t hurt myself, Ron. I wouldn’t do that, I swear.”

Ron nodded, accepting. “I can go and get a teacher if you want, maybe Lupin, you get on with him and he seems nice enough. He could help,” Ron suggested and Harry shook his head. “Madame Pomfrey?” 

“No, no one . Please, Ron. You help me,” Harry begged and Ron’s eyes widened in shock at his request before he rubbed the back of his neck, perching on the edge of Harry’s bed.

Harry could feel himself bleeding now that Ron had spelled away the puddle. Oh God, it was from the other bit, the bit the other boys didn’t have. Damn it, why the hell was this happening? What was happening? Why was he bleeding?

“Okay, Harry. I’ll help you. You want to keep this a secret, right?”

“Please, Ron, I’m already a freak, please don’t give them any more ammunition.”

“All right, I won’t tell anyone, just like your bad dreams.” Ron sighed, thinking hard. “I don’t know how to stop the bleeding, whatever it is. But I have an idea on how to hide it.”

“How?”

Ron raised his wand and pointed it at the ajar door of the dorm. “Accio Hermione’s sanitary towels,” he said. After a few moments, a squashy purple pack came zooming in, landing in Ron’s hand.

“Hermione’ll think one of the other girls nicked them. She’ll never think of us. Mum uses things like this when she gets her monthlies, as dad calls them. Whatever this bleeding is, these will probably soak it up. If you wear them you can hide this,” Ron explained. The redhead looked unsure of himself, staring at Harry.

“Thank you, Ron,” Harry said, reaching for the pack, but Ron held it out of his reach.

“You’re not quite a boy, are you?” Ron asked and Harry gaped at him. “This bleeding, it’s what girls do. So, either you’ve been attacked, hurt yourself or you’re having a monthly like a girl.”

“How do I know? I haven’t been attacked or hurt myself but how do I know if this is like a girls?” Harry asked timidly, knowing that it was pointless to try and hide it from Ron now. It was too late, much too late. Ron knew now. Besides, Ron had promised never to tell and Harry trusted him in that. Ron had never told anyone about his nightmares, why would he tell about this? 

“Is this the first time this has happened?” Harry nodded. “If it happens again next month, then it is like a girls monthly.”

“Oh.”

“What are you, Harry?” Ron asked and Harry shied away from him, making Ron curse at his bad conversation skills. “I didn’t mean it like that. I mean are you a boy or a girl? Because we’ve taken showers and they’re all open, so we can all see each other. I’ve seen you. You look like a boy to me, but boys don’t bleed like this, only girls.”

“I don’t know what I am,” Harry whispered, hanging his head. “I don’t know why I’m bleeding. I don’t know any of it, so I can’t answer your questions.”

Harry began to cry, hiding his face with his hands. He had hidden it so well, and now Ron knew he wasn’t right. Ron would hate him now, he would walk away. Harry was about to lose his best friend because of something he didn’t even have a name for.

“Your dick is real, isn’t it?”

Harry’s head shot up, staring at his softly grinning slightly red friend. “It’s real,” he muttered, going crimson, not quite sure where Ron was going with this.

“And you have nuts, right? I didn’t imagine those?”

“No, I have those.”

“Do you have something else as well, or is that it?”

Harry gaped at him in shock. Ron was helping him figure it out. These questions weren’t there to humiliate him, Ron was trying to help him. People may think Ron thick, but Harry knew better. Ron was a brilliant friend, and he usually figured things out, it just took him longer than others. Ron’s brains lay more with his common sense than his academics.

“Yes, I have something else,” Harry whispered. “I have…a…a…hole.” Merlin, he wanted to die right there and then, Sirius Black could kill him right that instant, he would actually be grateful for it. But he had to know if Ron could help, so he kept answering the questions as honestly as he could.

“A hole? You mean your arse?”

“No, another one, one that other boys don’t have.”

Ron looked utterly baffled. “I’ve never heard of anything like that.” He was squirming and his ears were going red. “Where are you bleeding from, do you know?” he asked, looking like he’d rather be having his teeth pulled, but his voice remained steady, determined.

Harry squirmed himself. “The other one,” he mumbled, his face absolutely roasting. He gasped, holding his stomach in pain. He had forgotten about that, his embarrassment clouding his mind, pushing the pain from it.

“Right, I’m going to push aside how gross I find this all,” Ron said, making Harry snigger despite everything. “Don’t laugh,” Ron said, laughing himself. “I’m not good with body things, I just about manage my own. Have a little patience with me, I’m doing my best.”

“I know. Thank you for helping me, Ron. I know I had no right to ask you to help me with this, and you’re no expert and hate body issues, but I trust you. I can’t tell anyone about this, everyone would hate me. It’s not normal, and I’m already freak enough.”

Ron stared at him. “I don’t hate you. You’re not a freak, don’t call yourself that. You’re my best mate. I promise I won’t ever tell anyone unless you’re dying or something and they need to know.” Harry nodded at the promise, the conditions of it. “This is just…so flipping weird,” Ron said simply.

“You have no idea.”

“So, I have a theory,” Ron said, launching away from how weird they both found this. “My theory is that this…other bit you have is a girl bit. Which makes you not quite a boy, but close enough.”

“I’ve always been called a boy,” Harry put in. “I think of myself as a boy.”

“Well, yeah, so does everyone else, me included. You’re in the boys dorm, not the girls. And you’re still just Harry to me. It doesn’t matter to me. You’re Harry, and you happen to have an extra girl bit,” Ron said honestly, rubbing Harry’s thin shoulder.

“Thanks,” Harry said, smiling shyly at him, and then crying out as his insides attacked him again, gripping at the sheet.

“Hermione could probably figure this out better than me,” Ron offered, worried by the pain, and Harry paled.

“No!” he hissed in a whisper. “She’ll just turn this into some blooming project, with me as the flipping specimen she dissects.” Ron sniggered.

“True. She would as well. But she’s your friend too, she’ll want to help, and we know she can keep a secret. Are you sure you don’t want her to know?”

“No. No one but you.”

“Okay then. Well, the pain must be cramps ‘cause of the bleeding. You’ve probably got more girl bits inside, but I am not helping you figure out that one, I draw a line,” Ron said firmly, making a slicing motion with his hand.

“I wouldn’t let you try anyways. That is beyond the call of best friendship,” Harry said, pulling a face at the thought of Ron, well, anyone at all, trying to see what other bits he might have. “How do I deal with the cramps, is there a spell?”

“Mum gets them, but I don’t know how she deals with it. Sorry, mate, I have no clue how to handle them.”

“It’s okay, you’ve done loads already. I’ll just grit my teeth and get on with it.” 

“Here,” he said, passing the pack to Harry. “I think you stick them in your undies, but I’m not sure, it’s not like I use them so I’m guessing here.”

Harry took it and peered at the outer plastic. Ah ha, there were instructions. Little pictures to show him what to do. He would need a pair of briefs from his trunk and a trip to the bathroom.

“I can handle it now, Ron. There are instructions,” Harry said, pointing to them.

“Okay, I’ll wait in my bed for you to come back,” Ron said and Harry nodded, slipping from his bed, grabbing the underwear and a fresh pair of pyjamas from his trunk before slipping into the bathroom.

Harry took a quick shower, washing away as much of the blood as he could, and then sat on the loo to try and put the pad on. It took him quite a while to figure it all out, and three attempts to actually get the thing to stay in place. When he pulled up the underwear, he felt like he was wearing a big pillow, but he wasn’t bleeding through it, so he would suffer it. He slipped into the fresh pyjamas and rinsed the bloodstained ones in the sink before he hid them in the bottom of the laundry. It would not be good if the house elves saw them and told a teacher, but he didn’t know what spell Ron had used. Ron had done so much already, he would not ask him to do this for him. He managed to get most of it out, they wouldn’t notice a few small specks of blood. It kind of looked like red ink, which was a bonus.

When he made his way back to bed, he found that Ron had cleaned his sheets for him again, and he had pulled them back so his bed looked inviting.

“All right?” Ron asked as Harry slipped between the sheets, setting his glasses on his nightstand.

“Yeah. Thanks, Ron,” Harry said and then buried his head in his pillow, crying out. His insides felt like they were being shredded.

A hand grasped his and Harry looked up to find Ron sitting next to him, holding his hand. As he groaned again, Ron rubbed his back, muttering to him that it would all be all right.

Ron stayed like that with him until he fell asleep, exhausted, and in the morning he left him to dream on until the other three boys left the Tower so Harry could use the bathroom in peace.

Harry’s eyes shot open and he writhed in pain, realizing he had been screaming in his sleep. Severus was holding him steady, and he was murmuring soothing words to him, urging Harry to tell him what was wrong, to talk to him. He managed to glance the clock. It was half eleven. Oh well, earlier than the first time.

He wanted to tell him, needed to explain it. He had nothing for this period, no pads, nothing. He needed Severus’ help to deal with it. But he couldn’t get the words out through the screams and gasps his body was forcing from him. Severus obviously had not noticed the blood yet. Harry screaming must have distracted him, he must have thought Harry was having a nightmare.

He curled into a ball on his side, gripping his pillow with one hand and his lower abdomen with the other. The screams could not be stopped, it was too painful this time. Harry had only had one other period like this, the middle of his fifth year. He hadn’t been able to talk during those cramps either, or move. Ron had cast silencing charms on the drapes of Dean, Seamus and Neville’s beds, and then sat with him until it eased slightly. 

The pain was beyond anything else, even when he had birthed Miri, though he wasn’t sure how that could even be possible.

Harry didn’t know what else to do. He screamed for help, for the one who could get it for him, who could explain to Severus, forcing the agonised wails to form a word.

“RON!”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Ron lay there listening to the screams from his friend, his wife lying next to him, wide awake. Hermione was snuggled up to him, the screams from Harry terrifying her, but Ron was calm. Those were not screams of panic, those were pain.

He had woken to Harry too many times not to be able to tell the difference. Ever since their second year, Harry had woken at least once a week, crying because of what his mind was forcing on him in his sleep. Ron had gotten up with him after the third time, and sat with him until he settled himself back into a peaceful slumber. The different screams had begun in their third year, by which time Ron had evolved into being a scarily light sleeper. Ron knew all too well what he was hearing, and vowed to leave it to Severus unless he was needed.

Ron knew all about Harry’s periods. He could recite that Harry bled for no longer than three days, that Harry suffered excruciating cramps and violent nausea which had him spending those sleepless nights in Myrtle’s bathroom, and that Harry frequently ran out of protection, the flooding of his period tearing through his supplies.

“I hope he’s all right,” Hermione whispered, easing from the bed to scoop up Joseph. The little boy had been woken by the agonised shrieks, though Catherine slept on. Hermione paced with him, and Ron propped himself up on his elbows to watch her.

“He’s fine,” Ron said and she looked at him in question. “That’s not a nightmare scream, it’s pain.”

“Pain?”

“Cramps,” Ron said simply and her eyes widened for a moment before she nodded in comprehension.

“How do you know?”

“Five years of sharing a room with my best friend, I learnt to tell the difference.”

Hermione perched on the bed and Ron took Joseph from her, cuddling him close as Harry reached a higher pitch.

“It was you, wasn’t it?” Hermione asked and he raised an eyebrow, waiting for her to elaborate. “My pads kept going missing. It was you who took them, wasn’t it? You took them for Harry, didn’t you?”

“Yes. He didn’t have anything the first time, and I overheard you talking to Parvati, I knew you had things for it. The other times, he ran out ‘cause he’s bleeds so heavy. I summoned yours for him,” Ron said, stroking his sons red hair as he cried his distress at being woken.

“And you’re the one who got up with him in the night?” He nodded. “Every single time?” He nodded again, his eyes meeting hers. She was smiling, and she leaned in to kiss him.

“What was that for?” he asked as Joseph began to settle.

“For being a wonderful man. You took care of him, and that makes me very happy,” she said simply, stroking his hair.

“RON!”

Their heads jerked towards the door as the cry hit them and Ron knew immediately what was wrong.

“Can I nick your pads for him again, in case he doesn’t have any?” he asked.

“Sure. They’re in the bathroom,” she said, taking Joseph and pacing once more as Ron moved from the bed. 

“Thanks. I don’t know how long I’ll be, go back to sleep if you can,” he advised and waited for her nod before he slipped from the room. He grabbed the squashy package from the bathroom he and Hermione used and made his way up to Harry’s room on the floor above. He knocked on Harry’s door.

“He’s fine,” came Severus’ voice. Obviously the ex-professor was expecting someone to come and check on his husband.

Ron ignored him and knocked again, louder. There were footsteps and then the door opened a crack, Severus peering out at him.

“He is fine, Ron. I have everything under control,” Severus said, Harry screaming behind him.

“I know you do, but he called for me,” Ron said and Severus nodded. “He’s not panicking, it’s not a nightmare. It’s his monthly…his period.”

Severus gaped for a moment before he allowed Ron inside. 

“Ron,” Harry gasped as he caught sight of the redhead.

“Don’t worry, I’ve got it, Harry, I’ll explain,” Ron said.

The Gryffindor crossed to the bed, plonked the pack on the nightstand and pulled back the sheet. The sheet under Harry was soaked with blood, like a poppy blooming out from his hips. His pyjama bottoms were drenched too, though they were dry below the knee.

“See?” Ron asked Severus and the Potions Master nodded. Ron noticed that he was blood free, Harry had obviously writhed too much for him to get close. “He called for me because he can’t tell you what he needs through the screams. It’s too painful for him to speak. I can tell you what he needs, how to help him. That’s why he called for me, we agreed on it months ago, when I first came to live here.”

“What do I do?” Severus asked. He marvelled at the ingenuity of his husband.

“Get him a pain potion for the cramps and something for nausea, he feels sick during these. I wasn’t sure if he had pads or not, so I brought Hermione’s. We’ve nicked hers before, he’s comfortable with this kind,” Ron explained, motioning to the pack. “I’ll stay with him while you get what he needs. I’d go but I don’t know one potion from the other and I’d really rather not poison my best mate.”

Severus nodded and sped from the room. Ron sat down beside Harry, careful to avoid the wetness, and grabbed his hand, Harry’s grip close to breaking bone. The Seeker screamed and gasped, sobbing in pain and Ron found it saddening that he was used to it. He rubbed Harry’s back and wondered how they were going to deal with the soiled bedding and sleepwear. They couldn’t use magic on them like before, not now. All bedding, clothes, towels and other fabric items in the house had to be cleaned by hand, in case they were mixed up and given to Remus by mistake.

“It’s all right, Harry. Severus is going to make it all better,” Ron soothed as Harry let out a particularly high pitched scream, shaking in agony. “We’re going to take care of you. Look on the bright side, you don’t have to hide it anymore.”

Harry loosened his grip slightly, a sign of agreement.

“Help me get these down him,” Severus commanded as he returned, crossing to the bed and sliding onto the mattress. 

Ron freed his hand and grabbed the tiny bottles as Severus pulled Harry into a sitting position. Harry was in too much pain to take them himself, or understand what he was being given would help. It was necessary to force them down him, Severus holding him, stopping him from fighting them while Ron administered the remedies. Ron waited until Harry settled a little and poured in the first between gasps. He held his hand over Harry’s mouth and Severus stroked his throat, making it go down. He had to wait for Harry to settle again before he administered the next liquid remedy, Harry screaming and drawing up his knees to his chest, his arms wrapped around his abdomen. Eventually, he gasped again and they were able to give him the second potion.

It took a while for Harry to settle fully, for his screams to die down, but he did calm in the end. He blinked at Ron as he curled against Severus.

“Thanks,” Harry whispered.

“No problem, don’t worry about it. You need anything else?” Ron said, reassuring Harry with his dismissal of his appreciation. Ron didn’t need it. Harry was more than just his friend at this point, they were family. He was just glad he could help.

“I don’t have anything,” Harry admitted, embarrassed, and Ron grabbed the pack of pads.

“Hermione’s given them to you. She knows it was us now. She doesn’t seem mad, but you might want to replace them this time.”

Harry nodded and took the pack from his friend.

“Thank you, Ron,” Severus said.

“Like I said, no problem. I’m going to go and leave you to it,” Ron said and left them alone.

“Sorry, Severus,” Harry mumbled, snuggled against Severus’ chest.

“For what?” Severus asked, stroking the dark, sweat soaked hair.

“I broke the rule, I didn’t talk.”

Severus kissed the top of his head. “It’s all right, Harry. There was a reason you didn’t talk, but you called for someone who could explain it all to me. It’s fine, don’t apologise, you did the right thing by calling Ron. He talked for you, so you did not break the rule,” Severus reassured and Harry nodded against his chest.

“But how do I deal with the sheets? And my pyjamas? Me and Ron always used a spell.”

Severus slipped from the bed, pulling out a fresh pair of pyjamas and a pair of briefs. He handed them to Harry.

“You go and clean yourself up, and I will deal with this. I’m sure one of the women in the house will know what to do, if not all of them,” Severus instructed and Harry went crimson. “What’s wrong, love?”

“It’s disgusting. I can’t leave you to deal with this and they shouldn’t have to. Just tell me what to do, I’ll do it,” Harry whispered.

Severus knelt down in front of him, looking up into the shame-filled green eyes. “Harry, it is no more disgusting than when you birthed Miri. It’s all right, I will deal with this, it is no problem. Remember, I am the man who disembowels toads for potion ingredients. Not a lot makes me squeamish. And the ladies of the house have all bled themselves. They know how to deal with this, and they will take it in their strides. Go and clean yourself up,” Severus reassured, stroking his cheek. Harry chewed his lower lip for a moment before he nodded. He kissed Severus and slipped from the room, jumping in fright as Sirius appeared in the doorway as he reached it. Harry stood motionless in the doorway, silently staring between Severus and Sirius.

“Go on, Harry,” Severus instructed and sighed when Harry did as he was told.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle him,” Sirius said, hovering in the doorway, staring at the bloody sheets. “Remus was worried by the screams.”

“It’s all right, he’s having a rough night anyway,” Severus said, standing up from where he had kneeled in front of his husband. “His period started. The screaming was cramps.”

“Oh,” Sirius said, going red but looking relieved. “Is he all right?”

“He’s fine, just a little embarrassed. Ron was kind enough to come and explain what was happening and how to deal with it.”

Sirius nodded and disappeared, returning a few moments later with clean bed linens, the dark blue ones that were just for Harry’s room. Phoenix’s bedding was lilac, Solarin and Bill’s was a garish pattern of stars and planets. Remus and Sirius had Gryffindor red. It helped everyone to keep track with so many people in one house to have a different colour or pattern for each room, but there was the occasional mistake, something that could not afford to happen with Remus being so delicate. No linens could be cleaned with magic, it was just too risky for Remus if they got mixed up or borrowed. He set the bundle down on the dresser and began to strip off the pillows.

“You do not have to help. I can manage,” Severus said and Sirius shook his head.

“It’s the least I can do after verbally attacking you last night. Besides, don’t fathers help out when their son is in need?” Sirius said, and Severus smiled at him. “Don’t know of any other fathers who have a son that has periods, but I take it as a good thing. A sign he isn’t pregnant again.”

“He is on the Biannual Potion,” Severus supplied at the suspicious look thrown his way. “He took it Saturday morning, while you were with Sam. I did notice the glare, you know. And Harry has no desires to be a carrier again so soon.”

“Good to know. You brewed the potion, right?”

“I would not let him take anything I had not brewed. I do not trust other brewers. I am a Potions Master for a reason and I will not have my husband put at risk.”

“That is very reassuring.” He growled. “Bloody con men with their flipping greed, all scaring people and shit, making a man have to escort his husband to the bathroom. Bloody fraudsters throwing out surprises,” Sirius muttered as he reached for the duvet. Severus ignored his rantings. He knew Sirius was excited about the baby, but his worry over the very real possibility of losing Remus overruled anything else he might have felt about the situation at this point in time. Severus did not offer any comfort or contradiction and soon Sirius fell silent, determinedly attacking the stained bedding.

They stripped the bed together, bundling up the stained bedding and putting it by the door before casting a cleaning charm on the mattress and padded duvet. Those did not have any chance of going near Remus, so it was safe to use magic on them. They had finished smoothing down the sheet and shaking a new cover onto the duvet before either one spoke again.

“I shouldn’t have said what I did,” Sirius said, wriggling a pillow into its case. “I was out of line.”

“You have apologised already, you know,” Severus said, wrestling with his own pillow.

“I know, but I wanted you to be aware of the fact that I trust you with him,” Sirius said. 

The two of them stared at each other. It was the closest they had ever come to a shaky acceptance of Severus caring for Harry. Sirius had retained a reluctance of it before now. It was their old petty childhood issues that had kept Sirius questioning Severus’ competence in caring for his godson. Remus had seemed to handle it better than he had, but Sirius knew that Remus had been playing the situation. Remus remaining seemingly accepting of the cub and the ex-Slytherin meant that Harry had been more relaxed with Remus than with Sirius. Remus had been manipulative, and it had worked.

But now Sirius saw just how bad Harry had been, what Severus had dealt with, broken him of. Severus had cared for his godson, returned him to something resembling what he used to be. This regression was just the timing, it was not Severus failing. Sirius knew that now, along with the love Severus and Harry had. His godson was, usually, happy, and Severus caused that happiness. It was enough.

“I trust you to take care of him. I know I’m a prat, I proved that at dinner, but I was only doing it because I care about him. I got worried by this regression he’s in, and I lashed out,” Sirius said. “I guess I didn’t realize just how bad he’d been, how far he’d come. Because of you. I’m not saying I’m going to be your best friend. But I’ll stop this anger over your handling of him. It’s pointless and irrational, caused by all the things that happened between you and I. I’m sorry, Severus.”

“Thank you for the apology,” Severus said. Sirius nodded and they completed making up the bed.

“Oh, and I’m sorry for trying to feed you to Remus that one time,” Sirius said and Severus snorted.

“Just promise you won’t do it again and you’re forgiven,” Severus bargained and Sirius sniggered.

“I don’t think you’d sit very well with his palate.”

Sirius left him, slipping downstairs to his room to reassure his husband, and Severus moved to the bathroom. 

“Harry, it’s Severus. I’m coming in,” he called before he let himself in, leaving the door open as he moved forwards.

Harry had taken a shower and dealt with his bleeding, but now he was hunched over the toilet, vomiting for all he was worth. Severus knelt beside him and rubbed his back, murmuring soothing nonsense.

Harry pulled back, sobbing. He flinched as Severus tried to pull him into his hold and then relaxed, remembering who he was with, curling into the arms. He curled his knees into his chest and wrapped his arms around them, his head resting against Severus’ chest. Severus had a leg either side of him and the long legs curled around him to make him feel more secure. The strong arms wrapped around him and stroked his back, smoothed his hair.

“He asked,” Harry whispered.

Severus was confused. He knew who ‘he’ was, but how had Harry reached a point of remembering what had happened to him? There was seemingly no trigger for this one, where had it come from? Sirius appeared in the doorway, clutching a pain potion and an anti nausea solution. Sirius had obviously heard Harry throwing up and Ron must have told him what Harry had taken. They had taken down all silencing charms, and Harry had apparently woken the whole house, if the noises from below them were any indicator.

Severus held up a hand briefly, warning him to stay in the doorway. Harry needed to talk, but he had never talked about his abduction and rape with other people in the room. Sirius nodded and stayed where he was, watching the scene. Severus reasoned it would probably be a good idea for Sirius to see this, to know how fragile Harry had once been. It would be a test of how well he would handle Harry’s full regression. If it got too much for Sirius, he could simply walk away. Harry’s back was to him, he would not know that Sirius had pulled away from the horrific remembrance, whatever it was going to be.

Harry gasped in air between sobs, finding the strength to say what he wanted to. The rule was to talk, he would talk.

“Lu…Lucius asked…about my p-periods…” He sobbed again, trying to block out the memory of that conversation, but he couldn’t, it would always be there. “He asked…when my…la-last one w-was and…and when m-my next one was.”

Severus rocked him and Harry managed to calm himself enough to talk without sobbing. His dry eyes stared out at the tiled wall, seeing that room, that man.

Severus understood what had triggered this now. This was the first menstruation since his abduction. Severus should have figured it out, but he had been too busy trying to deal with Harry’s screams of pain. But he would deal with it now. Harry would follow the rules, he would talk. And, like always, Severus would listen.

“I was going to meet Hermione and Ron, they were getting married, we were going to pick out robes, me and Ron. I was going to be his best man. I took the bus. The traffic was bad, I was running late. He grabbed me and I dropped my wand. He pulled me back into a dark alley. I could see Hermione, she was standing at the door, looking for me. There were Aurors with her. He put an arm around my waist and a hand over my mouth. I couldn’t call out for help, but I tried. He Apparated us to his house.” He released one hand from his knees and latched it onto Severus arm, holding tight. “I tried to figure out who had me, to think first, like you taught me. I tried to list all the Death Eaters who had stayed out of Azkaban in my head, but I only managed to think of you and Lu-Lucius before he threw me into th-that…that r-room.”

Severus was fighting his own tears. Harry had not told him of the very first time, not like this. He had described some moments of it, like the use of Lucius’ cane and the meal of toast, but he had not described this, the first few hours of his kidnap. Severus remained silent. Harry was just gathering himself, he wasn’t struggling to find the words. 

“I hit my head. When I came to, I was…was…chained and naked. It was dark, I had been there for a few hours, and I tried to look around, to see where I was. But it was hard without my glasses, and my head hurt. I could only see the bed I was on and the chains. Then…h-he came in.”

Sirius stood stock still in the doorway, his mouth hanging open. This was Harry’s full regression, recounting memories too horrific to imagine? Stuttering, sobbing, clinging to Severus in fear? This was what had happened to his special boy, what that son of a bitch had put him through? The only thing that he could think of that even came close to what he was seeing was Harry’s panic attack when he hit Severus the morning of their wedding. That was a picnic compared to this. This was already getting to him, his mind supplying him with images too clear to be easily dismissed. He wanted to walk away, curl up in a corner and pretend he had not heard a single thing, but he didn’t. Something forced him to stay. Severus’ eyes were clamped shut, and Sirius realized that Severus, who loved Harry more than anything else, who worshiped Harry, had listened to things like this from day one and managed not to go Lucius Hunting. His respect for the man grew.

“I tried to cover myself, so he wouldn’t see, but it was too late. He said something about…about the m-matter at ha-hand…he gave me th-the t-t-toast. He ate some…no poison…he fed me…my hands…pinned up…couldn’t…wiped crumbs.” Harry gasped, regaining himself. “Then he said that w-word. He t-told me what I was.”

“A hermaphrodite,” Severus supplied gently and Harry nodded. Harry was stuttering again, and he was having a hard time breathing. He was missing out words in his struggle to get it out, but Severus allowed it, he knew what Harry was saying, and he was sure that Sirius did as well. He considered telling Sirius to leave if he wanted to, that he didn‘t have to witness this if it was too much, but Harry stopped him, surprising him again.

“S-Sirius c-can come and…and s-sit with us…if…if h-he wants t-to…if he w-wants to…listen to this…he d-doesn’t have to…but I…I don’t m-mind,” Harry forced out and Sirius looked at Severus questioningly. On seeing the nod from the man, he made his way in and settled himself, leaning against the bathtub, his knees drawn up. He hadn’t realized Harry had known he was there, and Severus obviously hadn’t either.

“I brought you some more potions, pup,” Sirius said, his voice barely above a whisper. He set them on the floor between them and settled back, following Severus’ lead and staying silent. He would let Harry do this, and he would stay silent if it killed him.

Harry swallowed, trying to stay calm enough to carry on. Severus needed to know why he was this bad right now, what was going through his head.

“He was smiling…I hadn’t told anyone and he smiled about it…I didn’t know w-what I w-was called…and…and I was…was interested. No one h-had ev-ever e-explained it be-before. He e-explained what I was…e-explained it all. I told h-him only Ron knew, but I had n-never talked about…about it. He wanted…t-to know how Ron knew and…and I…I told him…Ron was there the first time, Ron helped me d-deal with it. And he asked ab-about the…the bleed-bleeding…when my l-last one was…when my n-next one was. He asked more…erections…female a-arousal. He asked if I…I en-enjoyed it. He s-smirked at m-me when I s-said I d-didn’t know h-how.”

Sirius was sickened. Lucius had ensured Harry was ovulating when he raped him, ensured he would fall pregnant. Miri was not some accident as Sirius had thought she was. Sirius had assumed that Miri was an unplanned by-product of Harry’s ordeal. Lucius had also purposely made sure that Harry had no idea what the hell was coming, that Harry had been at his most terrified when he violated him. Sirius would happily go back to Azkaban if he was just allowed ten minutes alone with a wandless Lucius.

Mind you, Severus didn’t look much better than Sirius felt. Sirius was convinced that if Severus bit any harder on his lower lip he would gnaw clean through it. But it was probably the best way to handle staying silent. Sirius was surprised to feel his own lip between his teeth, sore and swollen. He hadn’t noticed himself biting it.

“He…he t-took off…his…his clothes…talking ab-about l-leg-legends…and the l-law. He tal-talked about maid-maidenhead…about mine. If…if he t-took it…he owned m-me.” Harry let out a hollow laugh. “I begged,” he whispered, his nails digging in to Severus’ arm as anger replaced his panic.

Severus saw the Animagus wipe away his tears but Severus didn’t have to, his had not fallen. He knew what was coming next and he braced himself for it. He felt Harry tense. He was not going to stutter anymore, or skip out words, not for this bit. No, Harry was angry now. He vaguely wondered if Sirius could handle what was coming next.

“Fucking bastard! I didn’t know, how was I supposed to! I knew how Seamus and Dean had sex, and how a boy and girl had sex, the boys talked enough for me to know that! But how the hell was I supposed to do it!” Harry snarled, and Severus saw Sirius’ eyes widen at how open and honest it was, at how sudden a change there was. He shook his head slightly and Sirius nodded, he would remain the silent observer until shown otherwise by Harry.

“You were not to know. No one would have expected you to,” Severus said and Harry nodded before he snorted.

“I didn’t even know how babies were made! The guys never talked about that little detail! No one ever told me! How was I supposed to know I could get pregnant! I didn’t even know what fucking girl bits I had! He kept on about ‘bear the male child’, what the fuck was bearing a child! Hogwarts doesn’t exactly have a class on it, you know! Hermaphrodite baby making 101! Fucking prick!” Harry fumed, kicking the wall briefly, Severus biting back his smirk, Sirius still staring in amazement.

“That he is,” Severus agreed.

“I couldn’t tell anyone, I was convinced they’d hate me! And the talk you gave me the summer before my fifth year didn’t help any, Sirius,” Harry said, fixing his eyes on his godfather as he curled his leg back into his chest. “It was good advice, but it didn’t quite apply, not when I was lost about it all. ‘Use protection’ without explanation didn’t help.”

“I’m sorry, pup. If I’d have known, I would have told you more than just ‘use protection’,” Sirius admitted and Harry nodded before he stared angrily at the wall again. 

Severus was shaking in silent laughter, and Sirius resolved to explain that little statement later. He had tried to give Harry the talk on the birds and the bees, but Harry hadn’t let him. Harry had just walked away, stating he didn’t need it. Sirius only managed to get out ‘use protection’, his badly decided upon opening line, before Harry shot him down. He should have pushed it. He didn’t and now he wished he had. Not that there was anything left for him to tell Harry at this point, but he still should have educated his son.

“I begged him,” Harry whispered, depression setting in with the memories. “I told him I wasn’t ready to have sex with anyone, that I barely knew him. I asked him not to do it.”

Severus stroked the dark hair, waiting for Harry to get to the heart of it. He hoped Sirius could handle this, Harry would be devastated if Sirius pulled away now.

“I said that no one would let him keep me, but he talked about the law and Azkaban. Then, as he began to touch me, I promised to keep it a secret. If he let me go, I’d never tell anyone. He ignored it, said he wasn’t going to let me go. I started to panic…he kissed my face and neck, pinned my legs as I tried to kick him.”

It was like watching a movie on the insides of his eyes, Harry couldn’t stop talking now, even if he wanted to. It was all spilling forth now, and his mind slipped back to that room, that man, that day.

“I shattered the glass and the plate and he said he’d render me unconscious if I panicked too much. So I stayed calm. He promised to be gentle.” Harry began to cry again, thinking back. “He lied. There’s only one Death Eater who doesn’t like causing pain…but I…I didn’t let myself think of you…I couldn’t…not while he did that.” 

He sniffed and Severus handed him a length of tissue. He blew his nose and gripped the tissue in his free hand, his other was busy tracing Severus’ Dark Mark.

“I asked…him to…to tell me…when he was going to…to…do it…after that I just lay there. I screamed….and cried. He touched me…and did things to me…the cane…and the leather tied tight…and then…then…he…he…” Harry shook his head, unable to say it.

“It’s all right, love. You don’t have to say that word, you don’t have to say what he did next, we know,” Severus soothed and Harry nodded.

“He bit…and scratched…and broke…” At the mention of each injury, Harry subconsciously ran his fingers over a body part. For ‘bit’ he touched his shoulder; for ‘scratched’ he touched his side; for ‘broke’ he touched his wrist. “When it was over…he put that…that thing in…in me. Don’t say it! He said it was ‘to ensure conception’…I didn’t know what that was…I didn’t know it meant getting pregnant…I didn’t know it would lead to Miri. He got up…and got dressed…and left. And I curled up…and I cried…and I panicked.”

Sirius appeared to be fighting rising vomit, but Severus admired the way he stayed where he was, not saying a word, not doing anything but waiting. It was a good sign. Severus pulled Harry in for a tight hug, the kind Harry used to like after a revelation last time he was like this. But Harry pulled away, scrambling away from him. He curled up in the corner behind the door, hugging his knees.

“I talked, I followed the rule. I want to be alone now,” Harry said calmly, staring at the floor.

“Take the potions and we will go,” Severus said immediately. Harry had done this before, pulled away, isolated himself. Severus knew from experience that if he pushed him, Harry would only withdraw from him further.

Harry grabbed the potions and gulped them down, passing the empty bottles to Severus. He buried his head against his knees and let himself fall apart, sobbing the way he had in the beginning, when he couldn’t even look at himself in the mirror.

Severus got to his feet and threw the stained pyjamas into the hallway before he pulled Sirius to his feet. The Animagus opened his mouth to protest but Severus clapped a hand over it, shaking his head. The blue eyes blazed and Severus shook his head a little more firmly, grabbing both of his wrists in his one free hand. Sirius looked shocked that he could be restrained so easily. 

“How long?” Severus asked, his hand still clamped over Sirius’ mouth. The thin shoulders shrugged and Severus sighed. “Very well. I shall be in the kitchen, come and find me when you are ready.”

He dragged Sirius from the room, Harry slamming the door behind them, and pinned Sirius to the wall. He kept his hands in place, silencing the Animagus.

“Listen to me. If you push him, he will pull away and it will take much longer to pull him back from this,” Severus hissed decisively. “We will leave him be, and it may only be today that he is like this.”

Eventually, Sirius nodded and Severus pulled his hand away. 

“Are all his memories of it like that?” Sirius asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Yes. He has never gone into detail like that about the first time before, but they are all like that. Are you all right?” Severus asked.

“I’m fine. I want to murder that son of a bitch, but I will deal with that. Will he be all right?”

“Yes. He has done this before, isolated himself like this after a memory. It does not last more than an hour, usually. He will come and find me when it is over,” Severus said, ending the conversation.

He checked on Miri, finding her fast asleep, though he didn’t know how. Thank Merlin for small miracles. Harry was not in a position to deal with her right now, yet Harry would not let anyone hold her at this point, not while he was hurting like this. Severus grabbed the stained bedding and pyjamas, making his way down to the kitchen, Sirius following.

The kitchen was full of people, the whole household except Solarin. They all looked at the two men expectantly but Severus ignored them. He dumped the laundry on the draining board, unsure of what else to do with it, and grabbed the jug of milk sitting on the table. He hurled it at the wall, shattering it, sending milk and glass flying. He strode across the room to a clear wall and punched it as hard as he could, feeling the bones in his hand snap at the impact. He leant against the wall, breathing deep, before he slid down it. He drew up his knees and rested his elbows on them, holding his head in his hands. His fingers threaded through his hair and he pulled at it, using the pain to snap him back to sense.

He looked up and examined his hand, watching the blood trickle down from the broken skin.

“Can someone heal my hand for me, please?” he mumbled. “I do not trust myself with a wand right now.”

Arthur came forwards and healed it before Anne rubbed a healing balm into it. Molly set to the laundry he had brought down, soaking it in a large pail of cold water.

“What happened?” Hermione asked and Severus looked away from her, studying the grey stone tiles of the floor. What the hell could he tell them? ‘Oh, I’m sorry, my husband just went into excruciating detail about the first time Lucius Malfoy violated him, I just needed to relieve some anger so I don’t kill someone’? He didn’t think that would cut it.

“Harry shared a memory with us,” Sirius answered for him, sweeping up the destroyed jug. “Don’t ask what it was, we’re not telling you. All you need to know is that it was bad and Harry needs to be alone right now. He’s in his bathroom. We will all stay down here or go back to bed. We will leave him be.”

“Is he all right?” Remus enquired worriedly.

“He is fine. He just needs some time alone. He will come out when he is ready,” Sirius assured and Remus nodded.

“Are you all right, Severus?” Ron asked and Severus stared at him.

Was he all right? Yes, he was. Harry had just caught him off guard with his recollections. He used to be hardened to them, dealing with them by swearing himself silly in a silenced room so Harry could not hear him. Smashing the jug and breaking his hand were not the most mature actions to have undertaken, but he had required them.

“I am all right now. I just needed to vent, hence the jug. It is not easy to listen to Harry’s memories,” Severus assured. He sighed. “Thank you for helping him, Ron.”

“I told you, it’s no problem,” Ron said. He and Hermione were holding a sleepy baby each, Hermione cuddling Joseph and Ron snuggling Catherine. The infants were a breath away from sleep, and their parents looked that way too.

“You misunderstand. Not just for tonight, thank you for all the times you helped him in school, when he would not go to a teacher.”

Ron gaped and his ears went bright red. “He’s my friend. He needed help, I couldn’t say no,” Ron mumbled.

“You could have,” Sirius put in. 

Remus was staring at his husband in amazement of how well he was interacting with Severus, even helping the man put across what he wanted to. What the hell happened up there? What the hell had Sirius seen? Heard? He was never this calm, this resigned. This was new, but it was a good new. He refrained from passing comment. He could grill him later, if Sirius would tell him.

“Yes, you could have turned away. Not many thirteen year old boys would deal very well with a period from their apparently male friend,” Anne agreed. “You sticking by him was a very noble thing to do. It shows wonderful moral fibre.”

Ron was practically glowing like a traffic light, he was that red.

“Thank you for taking care of him, Ron,” Remus said and the redhead nodded, hiding his face by gazing down at Catherine.

Severus took a deep breath and got to his feet, settling wearily at the table. Charlie pushed a brandy into his hand and he nodded his thanks, downing it in one gulp. 

“Just out of sheer curiosity, when did he start these?” Severus asked. “Was it before or after the Shrieking Shack?”

“Before. He bled for three days, and on the fourth the Shrieking Shack happened,” Ron supplied, free with the information because Severus was the one asking. Harry was not in a position to tell Severus what he wanted to know, but he had called for Ron, who was. Ron knew that Harry wanted him to tell all, it was why Harry had screamed for him. Ron knew his friend incredibly well after seven years.

“Does he scream like that every month?” Sirius requested.

“Not always that severe, but his cramps are painful every time,” Ron said. “I can only remember one other this bad. It was in fifth year, in November.”

“How the hell did the two of you hide this?” Remus asked, his brow furrowed in concentration, trying to remember being Harry’s teacher. “None of us ever had a clue, and Harry was kept a very close eye on by all the teachers in his third year.”

“Yes, we kept a very close eye on him that year because of the rumours about Sirius wanting to kill him,” Severus agreed, and Sirius snorted. “All five years we were instructed by Albus to watch him. With all that was happening, and the events of his past, it would have been all too easy for him to slip into depression, which could have led to him becoming suicidal. Thankfully, he has never had any such urges, even after the bad things.”

“I asked him that,” Ron put in. “I could see how closely everyone was keeping an eye on him, and McGonagall took me aside and explained what you were worried about. When I woke up with him and saw all the blood, I asked him if he’d done something silly, if he had hurt himself. He swore to me that he’d never do anything like that, and I believed him. Harry wouldn’t physically abuse himself, it’s more verbal when he gets down.”

“So, how did you hide this?” Bill requested, changing the subject.

“I cast silencing charms on the drapes of Dean, Seamus and Neville’s beds so they didn’t hear. It worked because all five of use slept with the drapes closed, we were teenage boys after all, things were going to get a little…private.” They all smiled, knowing exactly what ‘private’ was. “I was always the one to wake Harry in the mornings, the others were too scared to, so during his periods I left him to sleep until everyone else had left the dorm. I perfected my use of cleaning charms on his sheets when he marked them. As for the pain, he grit his teeth and got through it on sheer determination. The protection he used, well, he used to buy that in bulk in the summers, but he bleeds really badly, he used to run out before he had a chance to buy more, no matter how well he calculated. He wouldn’t go to Madame Pomfrey for more, and I knew it was pointless to try and persuade him to go to anyone, so I summoned Hermione’s,” Ron explained.

“I assumed it was Lavender or someone else in my dorm,” Hermione said. “I had no idea it was Harry who was using them. But I’m glad he did. Even if I didn’t know, I was still helping in some way.”

“That’s why I summoned yours. He wouldn’t let me tell you, but you’re his friend. You would’ve wanted to help him too. This way, you were,” Ron said and she kissed him, the two of them swapping twins in an effort to get them to settle.

“What about his trips to the hospital wing? How did Poppy never see what he was?” Arthur questioned.

“You can’t see that bit of him unless he shows you. He’s never shown me, by the way, I’m just telling you what he told me,” Ron said, getting flustered. He took a deep breath to fight his embarrassment. “Harry told me that his…boy bits kind of…well…they hide it…the girl bits.”

They all waited patiently as he gathered himself. It was not easy for Ron to talk about this, he barely managed to deal with his own bits.

“Right, I’m just going to reel this all off, don’t interrupt, this is hard enough as it is,” Ron announced and they remained silent. “I’ve seen Harry in the showers at Hogwarts and I’ve shared a room with him. When he’s standing you see nothing girly. When he’s standing up, it’s all hidden. I never spied on him or anything, but it’s a fact of life that we’re going to see each others bits, it’s a boarding school, it happens. Get it? Got it? Good.”

Charlie burst into a fit of laughter, Bill joining him, and Ginny, then Hermione and Phoenix. Before long, the whole table was laughing. Severus decided to take pity on the Gryffindor who’s face now matched his hair.

“Harry appears male. To the untrained eye, or one who is uninformed of his true anatomy, he appears to be nothing more than a young man. Poppy would have had no reason to examine his genitals, he did not display any grounds for an examination there, thus she was unaware,” Severus revealed. 

He had discussed this with Poppy Pomfrey, he knew why she had not seen it. She had treated Harry for unconsciousness, having the bones of his arm removed, duelling the Dark Lord several times, but nothing that would require a look between his legs. She may have changed him into pyjamas, but the matron used a spell to do that. Harry growing up so painfully shy of his body had caused him to hide himself, and Poppy had respected that.

“Why were they scared to wake him?” Phoenix asked.

Ron looked uncomfortable with this question, unsure of how well Harry would take him revealing it. He promised he wouldn’t. 

“He had nightmares,” Severus revealed. Ron sighed and smiled gratefully at him, to which he nodded. “That is how you knew the difference tonight, is it not?”

“Yes. I’ve been getting up with him since our second year. By the time we started our fourth year, I knew the difference without fail. Even when we didn’t talk, I still lay awake, incase he needed me,” Ron confessed. “The others used to get scared of his nightmare screams, which made them terrified of trying to wake him. They never figured out the difference, so they all assumed he was just having another nightmare. They learned to sleep through it, mostly. It was always me that woke him in the morning, always me that sat up with him at night. I couldn’t just leave him, he’s my best friend, he needed me.”

Molly moved in and hugged her son, telling him how proud he made them all.

Severus had Phoenix pull a fresh sheet of paper, and outlined Harry’s rules for her. She wrote them all down, decorating them with little moving pictures, and then Sirius stuck it up for them, right next to Remus’ rules. Harry’s sheet was divided into two halves. The top set of rules were ones that Harry had to follow. The bottom set were rules to follow when dealing with him.

“Everyone will follow them without exception,” Severus commanded. “The ones on the bottom are for you all to be clear on what to do. The top four are for him to follow, and he will obey without exclusion.”

They all nodded and sat there talking about the upcoming days events, all of them managing to remain coherent even though it had just gone one in the morning. 

Severus suggested that they spend the day in the garden, surmising that Harry might do better with open space rather than four walls. It was agreed and Sirius suggested a picnic for lunch, that they lay out a large blanket. Remus jumped at the idea, becoming tired of sitting in chairs all day. He could lounge on the blanket, feeling a little like his old self. 

At Severus’ questioning, Bill revealed that Solarin had dosed herself with a sleeping draught to allow herself some rest during Harry’s bad days, thus she had slept through all the screaming.

One by one, people began to drift off back to bed, until only Severus, Sirius and Remus remained at the table. Remus was exhausted but he insisted on waiting up for Harry to emerge and Sirius let him, provided he remained calm. Remus actually managed it, with Sirius distracting him by talking about Sam’s impending visit.

Severus sipped his tea, waiting. Harry would come out eventually, but it didn’t make it any easier for him to sit twiddling his thumbs until that happened. He chatted about everything and anything with the other two men, occupying himself, ignoring the desire to run upstairs and check on his lover. It was just gone two when Harry finally surfaced.

Harry wiped his eyes and sighed. He felt a little better after his cry. He wanted to stay in the bathroom forever, but that was not part of the deal. He couldn’t shut himself away, Miri probably would not like her carrier becoming a bathroom recluse and Severus would never let him do it. 

He hoisted himself to his feet, having to take four attempts to actually do it with his shaky legs. He washed his face, brushed his teeth and took a deep breath before he opened the door. He walked into the nursery and watched Miri sleep for a few minutes, clinging to the crib to keep himself upright, before he slowly made his way down the stairs. He was still in a state of barely controlled panic, and he wanted his anchor. His knees were like jelly, and he was shaking uncontrollably, the way he had all the way back in January. His heart was pounding and he was covered in a cold sweat. Maybe it had not been a good idea to recite the whole memory to Severus and Sirius. But he had been following rule number four, he had talked.

He peeked into the kitchen, relieved to find only his parents sitting with his husband. 

“Hi,” Harry mumbled quietly and they all smiled as they laid eyes on him. “Can I h-have some t-tea, please?”

“Of course, pup,” Remus said and Sirius moved to make it, choosing the peppermint one Harry liked.

Harry made his way into the room and gnawed at his thumbnail as he hovered uncertainly near Severus. He had practically shoved the man away. He wasn’t sure if Severus would let him curl up in his lap. But he needn’t have worried. Severus held his hand out, waiting for Harry to take it before he spoke.

“Do you want to cuddle, love?” Severus asked gently, smiling.

Harry nodded and let Severus pull him into his hold, his arms securely around Harry’s slender frame. He curled his fingers in Severus’ shirt and sighed at the tender kiss that was pressed to his scar as he rested his feet in the free chair next to Severus.

“How are you feeling?” Severus asked, motioning silently to Sirius for one of Harry’s bottles of pearlescent blue calming draught.

“Bad,” Harry whispered.

“It’s all right, love. This won’t last too long, I promise,” Severus reassured as Sirius gave them Harry’s tea and the potion in a small glass. “Harry, you have to take this.”

Harry eyed it. He knew what it was, but he didn’t want to take it.

“I d-don’t w-want it,” Harry argued. 

Severus sighed. They were going to play this game, were they? Harry was going to lose, Severus always won this game.

“Harry, look at The Rules,” Severus instructed, pointing to them. “Look next to them.”

Harry looked and found another piece of paper hung up. That hadn’t been there when he went to bed. When had that gone up?

“What’s t-that?”

“Those are Harry’s Rules. One of them says you will take any potions I deem necessary. You agreed to it during dinner. You will take this potion, Harry.”

“N-no,” Harry said stubbornly.

“Please?”

“N-no.”

“Either you take it or I force it down you,” Severus threatened.

Harry knew he was serious. He had done it before, restrained him and forced his potions down his throat the one time he had refused. Harry had understood that he had needed the nutrient potion, and all the others, and he had been foolish to refuse them. Severus had not pinned him beneath him, he had pinned him with Harry’s back to his chest and pulled open his mouth so Draco could just pour it in. Harry had been forced to swallow, or choke as Severus had held his hand over his mouth. Sneaky sod. Afterwards, Severus had soothed him with a slice of chocolate cake. 

Harry sighed. “C-can I have ch-chocolate if I t-take it?”

Severus smirked. “Yes, you can. You can have a treat every time you ingest the potions I give you. But you will take this one now, and take the others later.”

Harry nodded and reached out to grab the glass, but he merely managed to send it flying as his hand was shaking so badly. At least the glass stayed in one piece even if the potion was spilled all over the table in front of Remus. He pulled back his hand, letting out a small sob into Severus’ shoulder as he buried his head.

“S-sorry, I d-didn’t mean to…to do th-that,” Harry said and Severus kissed his trembling hand.

“It’s all right, it was an accident,” Severus soothed as Sirius chucked a cloth at Remus.

Remus mopped up the mess, staying seated, and Sirius brought him another one, along with a bar of Honeydukes milk chocolate, Harry’s favourite, as an enticement. 

“Th-thank y-you,” Harry mumbled, not able to look either of his fathers in the eye as Sirius reclaimed his seat.

Severus reached out and picked up the glass, bringing it to Harry’s hand. The sprite took it and Severus held him steady as he drank it, stroking his back as it was gulped down. Harry drank it all and released the glass to Severus, who set it down and broke Harry’s chocolate into pieces for him as the potion began to work. By the time Harry reached for a piece, his hand was steady, his breathing was slower and he had stopped shaking.

“Did Ron answer all of your questions?” Harry asked quietly, washing down his treat with a sip of tea.

Sirius chuckled. “How did you know he would?” he asked, relieved by the lack of stutter. He found it horrible for Harry to talk like that.

“I called for him. He knew that if I called for him then I wasn’t able to explain, so he could tell you all everything. Well, tell Severus everything,” Harry explained. “Me and him discussed it just after he moved in here, we agreed to that plan just in case.”

“He did inform us, love,” Severus said. “Why didn’t you ever tell one of us?”

“I thought you’d all hate me,” Harry mumbled, picking at the hem of his top.

“No one hates you, pup,” Remus said. “We would have helped you, shed light on what you are, what was happening to you. We would have helped you cope with this.”

“I know that now. But I didn’t then. I had to tell Ron, he saw the blood, I didn’t choose to tell him,” Harry said, gaining confidence.

“How are you feeling now?” Severus enquired, laying a careful hand on his belly to clarify what he was asking.

“Sore, but I’m not screaming anymore, so it’s much better,” Harry admitted.

“And the panic?”

“Better. I’m sorry I argued about the rule.”

“You obeyed in the end. Now, do you want to go back to bed?”

“No,” Harry said, snuggling into the broad chest. “Not yet. Can we just sit here for a while?”

“Of course. Remus, you and Sirius can go back to bed now if you wish,” Severus offered and Remus looked murderous.

“I’m not going anywhere, not until Harry does,” he demanded and Sirius rolled his eyes. 

“Mood swings,” Sirius muttered and Harry giggled. It was more of a titter but he did laugh. Remus glared at Sirius.

“I am not having a mood swing, I am ensuring the health and well being of our son,” Remus said angrily.

“Remain calm, one of The Rules,” Sirius said quickly and Remus craned round to see The Rules.

“Blasted things,” he muttered, huffing in his chair and crossing his arms. “Harry, can I have some of your fudge?” he asked hopefully.

Harry chewed his lip and looked up at Severus. “Is he allowed it?” Harry asked.

“Yes, he can have it. Honeydukes makes all of their traditional sweets, such as fudge and marzipan, the muggle way, with no magic involved. They claim it gives them a better flavour,” Severus explained.

“Then yes, you can have some fudge. I think there’s some vanilla left, I don’t think I’ve eaten all of that one. You like the vanilla one, right?” Harry offered as Sirius retrieved it for him.

“Thanks, pup. I love vanilla fudge, it’s my favourite,” Remus said, smiling as he was given the candy. He looked up sheepishly as he tucked into a big chewy piece. “Sorry, Sirius. I am having mood swings aren’t I?”

“Yes. Don’t fret, keeps me on my toes. But I know the trick now. Vanilla fudge. I’m going to buy it in bulk,” Sirius joked, making Remus blush.

They sat like that, soothing Harry with their banter until Remus glanced up to find Harry sleeping against Severus’ chest. 

He looked so much younger in sleep, looking scarily like the baby boy Lily had adored, the one she had proudly shown them toddling around her living room, the one James had said would be a brilliant Quidditch player after Sirius had given Harry a toy broom for his first birthday. Remus watched him sleep for a while, Severus and Sirius busy talking about the way they had fought in school. He still cuddled up in his sleep, he had done that to James, cuddling to him as James carried him to his crib or fell asleep on the sofa with Harry on his chest. He still played with his nose too, he had forever rubbed his nose in sleep as he sucked his thumb. Miri had obviously inherited it. He wondered what Lily and James would make of their baby boy now, and he realized that they would be incredibly proud of him, just like he was. 

Harry was everything his parents had hoped he would be. He was kind, comforting Hermione when she had wanted to give up, lending her his strength. He was brave, risking his life for everyone else when he could have been killed in the process. A true Gryffindor. He was gentle, so very loving. He was a gifted Seeker, James had wanted that, wanted his son to enjoy the sport as much as he had. Harry was intelligent, he got that from Lily. He was a wonderful carrier, if a little unsure of himself, and a devoted husband. He could be stubborn and manipulative, teasing and mocking, fragile and unstable, but most of all, he loved with all his heart.

That was what Lily and James had worried about the most, that if something happened to them, Harry would be all alone, with no one to love, no one to love him. Not the case. Harry had a whole family around him who had just dragged themselves out of bed to see if he was all right, even if they couldn’t help, couldn’t even see him. Harry was loved. Harry had found a true love with Severus, though James would have had a problem with it, just like Sirius had, but he would have come to see that Severus was the best possible match for Harry. Soul mates. 

Remus missed his friends and could wish forever and a day that they were here, watching their son with him, but it wasn’t going to happen. So he took comfort in the fact that Harry was safe, and he was home. He was home where they could all take care of him.

And because of Lily and James sacrificing themselves, Remus and Sirius had gotten their son, their chance to be parents, finally. If Remus had the choice, he would have his friends back in a heartbeat, giving up Harry to them without a second thought. But they were not here, and they were not coming back. Remus took comfort in the way things were now. Harry was theirs now, their boy, their son.

Harry, their little boy who snuffled in his sleep, who still sucked his thumb at seventeen.

“Severus, Harry’s fallen asleep,” Sirius said, snapping Remus out of his thoughts.

Severus looked down, stroking back the wayward fringe. Harry turned towards his touch as it moved down to cup his cheek.

“Severus?” Remus asked as Severus made to carry Harry back to bed.

“Yes, Remus.”

“Can you just sit there for a while? Leave it a bit longer before you take him back to bed?”

“Of course, but why?” Severus asked, confused by the request but he settled in his chair once more.

“I want to watch him sleep for a little longer. I haven’t been able to do it since he was a baby,” Remus explained as Harry stroked his nose once more, Severus tilting him back a little further so he was firmly cradled in Severus’ arms and Remus could see him better.

“I see. Just tell me when you’ve watched your fill,” Severus said sympathetically and Remus went back to his staring, hardly feeling the hand Sirius stroked down his back.

Doubt began to fill him. What if this pregnancy did not go to plan? What if it did kill him, as Sam had pointed out could so easily happen? He would be leaving Harry. Harry would not be alone, he would still have the rest of the family if something were to happen to Remus, but was Harry ready to have the threat of another parent being taken from him?

‘No,’ Remus thought firmly. ‘I will not die. This will all go to plan.’

After another twenty minutes, Remus allowed Sirius to take him back to bed and Severus to take Harry to his. They all slipped into bed at three and prayed that Harry would be able to sleep through peacefully until seven.

Remus curled into Sirius and wondered why Harry could not be as blessed as James had been. James had seemed to glide through life, avoiding trouble and heartache until the day he died. He had led a charmed life. Why did Harry have to be the one to suffer?

Maybe Harry was not only James’ son after all. 

He had James’ talent for trouble making, he could be cheeky like Sirius, he had his moments when he had Lily’s personality. And he rather resembled Remus’ knack for falling into the wrong situations.

Harry belonged to all of them.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Severus peered, bleary eyed, at the clock. In the four hours since they had gone back to bed, Harry had woken with nightmares twelve times. Each time, Severus had woken with him, finding Harry howling in his sleep. He had woken him and soothed him back to more pleasant dreams, but that had not lasted very long. It was less than twenty minutes before Harry was crying again. He suspected that he would need to brew a whole new batch of pepper up potion. Harry would have woken the rest of the house with his cries, they would all need something for the fatigue of a sleepless night.

Severus realized Harry was sobbing into his chest once more, and stroked his back, steeling himself for a very long day ahead. Harry was right, this was going to be bad.

“Harry, come on, wake up for me,” Severus urged, rocking him instead of shaking him awake. “Come on, love. It’s just a dream, just a bad dream. It’s all right, you’re safe.”

Harry blinked up at him, before burying his head and weeping into his chest again. Severus held him, letting him cry. It was better out than in.

After a few minutes Harry calmed and looked up at him tiredly. “What t-time is i-it?” Harry croaked, his voice hoarse from a whole night of panic.

“Seven. It’s time to get up, love.”

“I’ll g-go and…and sh-shower,” Harry mumbled, slipping from the bed and padding from the room, hugging himself.

Severus sighed. Back to this Harry then. This Harry was difficult to deal with, this Harry was scarily unpredictable with his behaviour. He could go from tears to panic to anger to isolation to clingy and everything in between in a heartbeat. There was seemingly no rhyme nor reason for Harry’s behaviour changes when he was like this, none whatsoever. They could be triggered by the tiniest thing. It reminded Severus of the rollercoaster he had gone on once with Solarin. He had not enjoyed it, and he did not enjoy this. But he would do it, and hope this did not last more than a few days. If he was lucky, Harry would snap out of it before lunch, or maybe dinner. If he was lucky, this would only last a few hours. Harry had done that before, regressed for a few hours and then it burnt itself out, leaving a happy Harry once more.

He eased himself from the bed and began to make it, glancing at Harry’s side to ensure he had not marked this set. There was no trace of blood, so he smoothed the sheet, fluffed the duvet and plumped pillows, busying himself while Harry dealt with himself in the bathroom.

“Severus?”

He glanced at the door, where Ron was standing holding a potion. 

“Good morning, Ron,” Severus said tiredly.

“Morning. Sirius sent you a pepper up,” Ron said, holding out the bottle. “We’re going to need more, all of us have had some. Harry even managed to break through Sol’s sleeping draught. Though, how the hell does she look so good on so little sleep? It’s not fair.”

Severus received it with a smile and gulped it down, feeling his fatigue dissolve as it took effect.

“Thank you,” Severus said, moving to the dresser to find Harry some clothes. “And Solarin looks good on so little sleep because she rarely sleeps. She always looks like that.”

“Ah. Ummm….there’s something I forgot to tell you last night,” Ron said quietly and Severus turned to look at him, arching an eyebrow in question. “When Harry bleeds, he sometimes likes big baggy clothes. He says that it feels better to hide himself when he bleeds. He doesn’t always wear that kind of thing, but he might prefer it at the moment, what with everything that’s going on with him today.”

“Thank you, Ron. You are a very good friend,” Severus said, pulling a pair of his own trousers and one of his own shirts for Harry. He grabbed a belt, his trousers would not stay up on Harry without one.

“Anne said to tell you that breakfast is ready, and it’s out in the garden. Bill and Charlie set up the tables, it’s all ready for Harry.”

“We’ll be down soon, once I persuade him to actually attend the meal,” Severus said. “Could I have a calming draught, a pain potion, one for nausea, a pepper up and a nutrient potion set up on the table ready for him? Though, it would be best if he was not able to see them at first. He will probably be reluctant to take them, so it will be best to get some food into him first, before we attempt it.”

“I’ll get it done for you. Anything else?”

“There is no toast on the table, is there?”

“No, Remus explained that one to Anne this morning when she tried to make it. There’s no pumpkin juice either, just in case,” Ron assured and Severus sighed in relief. One hurdle cleared. 

The dark haired man nodded and Ron left him. Severus grabbed clothes for himself and underwear and shoes for them both before he slipped into the bathroom.

“Harry, I’ve brought you some clothes,” Severus said, seeing Harry nod through the frosted glass door of the shower cubicle. “They’re on the toilet tank.”

Severus relieved himself, brushed his teeth and shaved while he waited for Harry to emerge. Harry turned his back on him as he stepped out and Severus showered quickly, moving as fast as he could.

When he stepped out, he found Harry sitting on the floor, his knees drawn up. He had managed to dress his lower half, apparently not even his panic could make him despondent enough to go unprotected during his period, but the shirt was lying across his bare feet. 

“Harry?”

He was ignored and he dressed quickly before he knelt down and stroked Harry’s wet hair. Harry sniffed, and Severus noticed that he was picking at the scars across his stomach.

“Talk to me, love. Tell me what’s going through your head,” Severus urged.

“I…I l-looked in…in the…the m-mirror,” Harry said. “L-look at me. I’m c-covered in them.”

Harry had not been fussy about his scars since the first week of his rescue. He had experienced a few moments of lingering shame over them, but it had not happened for six months.

The shame filled eyes broke Severus’ heart. Damn Lucius Malfoy to the nine hells. “I am looking at you. And I see my beautiful husband. I do not care about the scars. Remember what they are? You told me that they were reminders of how lucky you are now. They are medals of honour and bravery, a symbol of how strong you are to have survived it,” Severus said firmly, reciting Harry’s own words back to him. 

“I hurt,” Harry whispered, clutching his stomach.

“We’ll get you something for it. But you have to finish getting dressed first so we can go downstairs.”

“Th-they can’t see! They c-can’t s-see them!” Harry panicked, covering his chest with his arms, and Severus held up the shirt and socks.

“Socks to cover your feet, even if you do not wear shoes, and a long sleeved shirt. You will be concealed. The shirt closes with buttons, so you can feed Miri and remain covered. No one will see, not today,” Severus assured and Harry nodded. Severus dressed him, Harry shaking too badly to do it unaided. Harry even let him push his feet into his favourite red Doctor Martins.

“I’m a…a f-freak,” Harry whispered brokenly. “No other b-boys b-bleed…like th-this. I’m a f-freak, just…just l-like Aunt Pet-Petunia always s-said I w-was.”

Severus fought the urge to kill Petunia. Landing himself in Azkaban would not be beneficial. “You are not a freak,” he argued. “You are special, you know that. You are my special Harry. You are not a freak.”

Harry stared at him and then nodded. He pulled Severus in for a kiss, clutching at him desperately. He pulled back and looked at his husband in horror.

“W-why isn’t i-it w-working? Why is-isn’t it h-help-helping?” Harry asked frantically.

“Because you are too panicked, love. My kisses can’t help, not right now, not while you are this bad. A potion will help though. Come on, let’s go and get Miri and we can get you one.”

“You d-do it. I c-can’t, I…I’ll drop h-her,” Harry insisted and Severus realized he was right. Harry was shaking too hard, it was impossible for him to hold Miri like this. Handling this fragile Harry had been so much easier when Miri was still a bump. He only had to care for one of them then. He would not complain, Harry and Miri were his all, his everything. It had just been simpler to handle this when Harry was pregnant.

Thank Merlin for Ron Weasley. The redhead appeared in the doorway, holding the now clean sheets from last night.

“Anne insisted these get put away now, while they’re still fresh or something like that. Where do I put them?” Ron asked, unable to see Harry where he was sitting.

“On the dresser and then come back here, I need your help,” Severus instructed and Ron sped from them, returning a moment later. Severus grabbed his hand and pulled him in, forcing him to crouch down so Harry could see him.

“Hi, Harry,” Ron said, and Severus was thoroughly impressed by how relaxed he sounded, by his gentle smile. It was as if Ron saw his friend falling apart every day and Severus was thankful that Ron was so good at dealing with Harry after almost seven years of Harry being put through the wringer by one madman or another.

“H-hi,” Harry whispered, staring at the floor.

“Harry, Ron is going to stay with you and I am going to go and get Miri,” Severus instructed and Harry nodded at him. He glanced at Ron and the redhead nodded, motioning to him that he would be fine with Harry while he was gone.

He moved to the nursery, where Miri was wide awake and babbling, waiting for him. He picked her up, bathed her in the baby bath he conjured and dressed her in a little pink summer dress before he carried her to the bathroom. He knelt down once more, and Harry stared at Miri, reaching out a shaking hand to hold one of hers. She began to scream and Harry snatched his hand back, gasping for breath.

“No, sweetheart. No look, no see,” Severus instructed her and she snuggled against him as she settled, looking for her reward. He kissed her curly head, pulling a toy for her from his pocket, and focussed on his husband.

“Harry, is it all right if Ron carries Miri for you?” Severus asked and Harry glanced between the three of them before he nodded slowly. 

“Only…only R-Ron,” Harry mumbled. “N-no one else t-touches her.”

“Only me, Harry,” Ron said, taking the tiny girl and tickling her under the chin. “I’ll hold her until you’re a bit calmer, until you can feed her.”

Ron stepped out of the room, Harry frantically scrambling around so he could watch him, refusing to let Miri out of his sight now he had seen her. Severus gently pulled Harry to his feet, leading him out and to the top of the stairs.

“Very good, you’re doing so well. Now, we’re going down to breakfast,” Severus said and Harry pulled away, backing up against the wall and shaking his head. Severus sighed and pulled him away, rubbing his back. “The rules, Harry. You have to attend breakfast.”

Harry held him in a death grip and let him lead him down the stairs. Ron placed Miri so she could see Harry over his shoulder and went down first, urging Harry to follow by walking away with his daughter. Miri did her part by waving her snitch at her carrier. Harry had to be half carried down, his legs would not work properly. They made their way out to the garden and Harry tried to scramble back into the house at the sight of the whole family sitting at the table.

Almost everyone looked petrified by his behaviour, but there were a select few who had seen something like this before and took it in their strides. Phoenix had witnessed all this the first time, and continued to eat her breakfast, ignoring Harry like Severus had taught her when she was Draco. Sirius chewed his lower lip and fixed his eyes on his plate, refusing to look. Solarin made herself busy by accepting the post from the owls that had just swooped in and landed on the backs of chairs. Everyone else stared at the terrifying image of Harry being restrained by Severus as he tried to back up from them, before Solarin reminded them to return to their breakfasts.

“Harry, we have the rule of you attending because you need to see that they all still love you. Come on, you are going to sit at the table next to Nixie, just like you used to sit next to Draco,” Severus urged, half dragging him to the table. He sat him down and immediately sat next to him, taking the free end of the table. Harry gripped his hand.

“I…I w-want to…to f-feed M-Miri be-before I…I eat,” Harry whispered and Ron came forwards, handing her over before he sat down next to Hermione and took Catherine from his mother, reassuring the two women. 

Severus knelt beside the shaking sprite and held him steady as he latched Miri, keeping him stable as he nursed her. Miri didn’t voice complaint on how turbulent her meal was, and Severus was thankful for having a placid daughter. Harry managed to calm down enough to not drop her as he winded her.

“S-Sirius can…can h-hold her,” Harry whispered and Severus motioned the Animagus over. Harry was still working on the fact that Sirius had not pulled away last night when he had heard what Harry had gone through, and Ron had never pulled away from him over what he was. He would only let them and Severus touch her, they were safe. Sirius crouched down, waiting patiently for instruction. It took Harry nearly ten minutes to breathe enough to speak again. “Y-you h-hold her…no one else…not R-Remus…no one…j-just you. N-no one t-touches…touches h-her,” Harry instructed and Sirius nodded.

“Only I hold her and no one touches her, not even Remus,” Sirius recited loud enough for the rest of the table to hear. Harry nodded and shakily handed her over, gripping Sirius’ wrists as he made sure she was safe. He let go and watched his godfather like a hawk as he returned to his seat. Sirius cradled the tiny girl, teasing her with the soft mermaid toy Severus had handed him. No one dared to even look at Miri, trying to help.

“That was very good, Harry,” Severus praised as Harry’s gaze moved to him once more. He eased himself back into his chair. “Now, you are going to eat. You cannot take potions on an empty stomach, not this many.”

“I’m n-not hungry,” Harry mumbled and Severus smirked. Harry had tried that one before, several times. It never worked.

“I do not care if you are hungry or not, you will eat. Rule number one, you will attempt to eat. You need to,” Severus argued as Anne fixed Harry a plate of scrambled eggs. Harry would not make a decision on what he wanted to eat, so it was better to decide for him.

“I d-don’t w-want to,” Harry insisted, but it was clear he already knew he was going to lose.

“Tough. You will try, at the very least.”

Harry huffed and crossed his arms, but he eventually nodded and was presented with his plate and a plastic cup of orange juice. Remus had filled the cup and, working on his experiences of the spilled calming draught last night, it was only half full. Less chance of Harry spilling it before someone caught the cup and no chance of the cup breaking if Harry accidentally sent it flying.

Harry began to eat, taking a tiny amount, and Severus accepted a coffee and a croissant. Harry was picking at his food more than eating it, but he did eat a bite or two, so Severus let it lie.

“Good morning, all,” Severus said and they jumped. Solarin smirked at him. “What are everyone’s plans for the day?”

They chatted quite pleasantly for the next half an hour, until Harry tugged on Severus’ sleeve.

“I…I c-can’t eat any…anymore,” Harry stuttered and Severus perused the plate. Harry had barely managed a quarter of it, and he suspected that Harry had merely moved his food around to make it look like he had eaten that much. Severus grabbed a roll and folded some bacon into it.

“Eat this roll and I will let you leave it,” Severus bargained and Harry glared at him before he took it, eating it as fast as he possibly could. It was gone in under a minute and Severus smiled as Harry sipped his juice, holding the cup with both quivering hands.

“C-can I l-leave it n-now?” Harry asked and Severus nodded.

“You can leave it, you did very well. Now you will take your potions,” Severus commanded and Harry shrank back into his chair, tugging the sleeves of his shirt down to cover his hands.

“I d-don’t want th-them,” Harry argued.

“I do not care. You will have them. You need them.”

“W-what are they?”

Harry was stalling, Severus knew that, but he played along. He motioned to Ron that this may get ugly, and Ron gave him an almost imperceptible nod. Harry would do better with Ron rather than Phoenix aiding Severus to administer them.

“A calming draught to ease the panic, a pain potion for the cramps, a nutrient potion for your lack of food yesterday, an anti nausea one for the sickness your period brings and a pepper up for the fatigue of your sleepless night,” he reeled off, pulling each one out from their hiding place behind the stack of pancakes.

Harry eyed them and started to slide around in his chair. Severus knew he thought he was being covert, that Severus didn’t see him do it, but Severus knew exactly what he was planning. 

“I d-don’t need th-them,” Harry assured. It wasn’t very convincing, he was as pale as a sheet and covered in a cold sweat despite the heat of the day. Another heat wave reaching its peak.

“Potter, you will take these much needed potions, every last one. You will take them willingly or I will administer them,” Severus warned.

“I…I’m f-fine. I d-don’t n-need them.”

“Hold out your hand and tell me again that you are fine,” Severus suggested and Harry put his hands in his lap. “You will take them.”

“No!” Harry yelled, shooting from his chair and heading for the door. He didn’t get very far, he hadn’t even taken one step away from his chair before Severus grabbed his arm.

Harry pulled and thrashed, trying to free himself but Severus was much bigger and stronger than him. Severus wrestled with him, turning him around so his back was to Severus’ chest. The Potions Master sat down on the grass and secured Harry’s kicking legs with one of his own, trapping them with it. Harry was screaming at him, fighting against it and everyone looked terrified by how wild he had gone suddenly.

“Let g-go! I d-don’t want th-them! L-let go!” Harry screeched and Severus made a grab for his hands.

Sirius stood up and moved off to the oak tree, showing Miri the leaves that were still enchanted gold. He didn’t think Miri should see this, and, quite frankly, he couldn’t bear to watch either. It was horrible, watching his godson being pinned to take his potions, but it was necessary. He trusted Severus to help Harry, he would stay out of it, suppress his urge to snatch Harry from Severus. Harry needed the potions. He kept reminding himself that this was necessary.

“I h-hate y-you! G-get off m-me! You c-can’t do th-this, you…you fu-fucking D-death Eater!” Harry screamed, but Severus merely sniggered. Harry had called him far worse, this was nothing and it was only a last desperate attempt at fighting him. Severus managed to grab both of the hands trying to take a swing at him and pinned them against Harry’s stomach with one of his own clasped tight around Harry’s wrists.

“Ron, now please,” Severus called calmly and Ron came forwards, Solarin following with the potions.

Ron knelt down and Harry glared at him, his mouth clamped shut. Harry knew what was about to happen, and the only defence he had left was to keep his mouth shut. Logical idea, they couldn’t give him potions if they couldn’t get them down his throat, but it would not work. Harry had been in too much pain last night to cooperate, so they had forced them down then. Harry did not stand a chance, not against Severus and Ron.

“Harry, this is your last chance. Take them willingly, or we make you,” Severus offered clearly and Harry went still, considering it.

“F-fuck y-you!” Harry snarled at him and Severus chuckled.

“Not right now, love, maybe later. Potions now,” Severus said and Solarin snorted. She handed Ron the calming draught and Harry shut his mouth once more.

“I’m ready, Severus,” Ron said and Severus grabbed Harry’s jaw, holding his head still by wedging it between his own head and his shoulder. He slowly increased pressure until Harry’s mouth was open and Ron shoved it in, pouring it as fast as he could and then holding his hand over his mouth so he could not spit it out.

Severus stroked his throat, inducing his swallowing reflex and Harry gulped it down. Before Harry could voice anymore protest, they forced the other four potions down him and then Ron and Solarin backed off, leaving Severus to deal with a hysterical Harry.

Severus cautiously released the wrists and then freed Harry from his hold when he decided Harry would not attack him again. He turned him around and held him as he shrieked, tears pouring down his face, the force of it making it damn near impossible for him to breathe. Severus picked him up and carried him to the table, settling him in his lap and stroking his hair and back, rocking him.

“I’m sorry, love, but you left us with no choice. I apologise for how distressed you got, but I will not apologise for pinning you. You know the rules, you disobeyed. You were well aware of the consequences of refusing the potions. I will not apologise for that, but I am sorry you got so worked up, that it came to that,” Severus soothed as Harry tried to burrow into his chest. 

Phoenix and Anne had disappeared and Severus wondered where they had gone. Remus appeared close to tears, Bill and Charlie were slack jawed and Ron was cradling a shaking Hermione. Sirius was hiding under the oak tree with Miri, and Severus considered him a very clever man for walking away from what he could not handle. Ginny was staring at her plate, Arthur and Molly were gripping at each other, and Solarin was calmly eating her fruit salad.

“I’m s-sorry, S-Severus,” Harry forced out between sobs.

“It’s all right. We have done this before, though I find it slightly amusing that you think you can get away with it,” Severus reassured and Harry shook his head.

“Not j-just that…I…I c-called you…things,” Harry clarified.

“You have called me worse. Did you mean it?” Harry shook his head so hard Severus was amazed it didn’t fly off. “Then it does not matter. You were angry at me, I understand where it came from. It is all right, love,” Severus soothed and Harry seemed to calm somewhat in his hysteria.

Phoenix and Anne returned and Severus was highly amused. Phoenix set down a mug of peppermint tea and a bar of chocolate, and Anne set down a box of tissues. Neither female seemed phased by the whole situation. In fact, they started to clear away some of the empty plates, making more room.

“Harry, you can have some chocolate now. You consumed the potions, you can have a treat,” Severus said, snatching up a tissue and mopping up the tears. Harry turned his head to the table and spotted the bar.

“Who got it for me?” Harry asked, and Severus sighed in relief at the lack of stutter.

“Nixie got you the chocolate and the tea, and Anne got you the tissues,” Severus said.

“Thank you,” Harry said to Phoenix.

“No problem,” Phoenix said, nibbling on her own bar. “I nicked one. You don’t eat the dark chocolate anyways.”

Harry peered around catching sight of Anne. “Thank you, nana.”

Anne practically glowed. She had offered the pet name to both Phoenix and Harry, but only Phoenix had taken her up on it. Phoenix had actually taken to calling Remus ‘papa’ and Sirius ‘dad’, something they rejoiced in, but Harry would not reach that point with the two men. Harry had called her Anne or Mrs. Lupin before now. Severus took it as a sign that the calming draught was working.

“Oh! It’s all right, dear, no trouble, no trouble at all,” Anne gushed. “Are you feeling better now?”

Harry nodded as Severus began to break up the chocolate for him and Harry slowly picked up the mug of tea, sighing when his hands were steady.

“I should have just taken them,” Harry muttered.

“You have taken them. It was simply a little troublesome to do so,” Severus dismissed and Harry smiled, his eyes darting around for his baby.

“Where’s Miri?” he asked worriedly.

“Sirius is sitting with her under the oak tree.”

Harry peered over to see his godfather cuddling his daughter, tickling her nose with a pansy from the flower bed, which she was trying to grab and eat. Harry left them to it as he drank his tea and consumed his chocolate. 

Arthur and Bill left for work, kissing their respective ladies goodbye, and Anne carried out a huge blanket, Remus’ eyes lighting up. Solarin, Hermione, Anne and Phoenix grabbed a corner each, spreading it out on the grass. It was big enough to carpet the living room, though it covered barely a tenth of the huge garden, and Harry wondered what it was for.

“We’re going to have a picnic for lunch,” Ron explained as he gathered up plates to take to the kitchen, seeing Harry’s confused expression. “Remus is getting sick of sitting in chairs all day, so Sirius suggested the picnic. We’re all going to lounge on the blanket for the day.”

Harry smiled. “Sounds good,” he said and Ron grinned at him, moving away. “Severus, I feel much better. I think it’s burnt itself out now.”

“That is very good, love. Do you know why? Is it simply the calming draught?” Severus queried, stealing a piece of chocolate.

“The time,” Harry said simply, putting his empty mug on the table.

“I don’t understand,” Severus said, glancing at his watch. It was just gone ten. What did the time have to do with anything?

“He took me at nine. I was meant to meet Ron and Hermione at nine, but there was traffic so I was running late. I looked at my watch just before he grabbed me. He took me at quarter past nine,” Harry explained, sitting up fully and turning to face Severus. “It’s gone ten, and I’m still here, I’m still safe. He hasn’t taken me today. I feel much better now.”

Severus smiled and leaned in, cautiously kissing him. He was rewarded with an enthusiastic kiss, Harry’s hands stealing into his hair, the gentle tongue duelling with his own. When they pulled back, Harry was smiling at him, one of his megawatt smiles.

“Thank Merlin,” Severus breathed. It wasn’t even lunchtime and Harry’s bad phase had burnt itself out. “I was worried this may carry on all day, that you would do yourself some damage if it went on much longer.”

“I know, and I’m sorry I kept you up all night,” Harry said, his arms wrapped around his lovers neck.

“It is perfectly all right. I understand why it happened. Do not feel the need to apologise for any of this, to anyone,” Severus reassured and Harry kissed him again.

Charlie escorted Remus to the blanket and Harry sniggered at how fast he moved. Solarin brought out Remus’ papers, the werewolf eagerly setting down to work, propped up on his side by some pillows Ginny chucked out of one of the upstairs windows. They appeared to be the masses of cushions that adorned the living room. Solarin retrieved her own research and settled down near Remus, the two of them throwing theories around.

Harry stood up and kissed Severus. “I’m going to the bathroom. I will not take Miri,” Harry said. “I’ll be good now, I’ll follow the rules.”

“Only for the rest of today, Harry, just to be sure that you are back to your old self,” Severus guaranteed.

“I see the point of that, this could just be a good moment, I could get bad again. Besides, I don’t think I could hold Miri and go to the bathroom now I’m bleeding,” Harry admitted. “I kind of need both hands for it now.”

Severus chuckled and Harry grinned. Harry moved away a few paces and then spun on his heel, returning. 

“Can Sol still conjure balls of light?” Harry asked.

“I have no idea. We could ask her.”

Harry nodded and slipped into the house.

Severus scrubbed his face with his hands and made his way over to the blanket, where the family was gathered, making themselves comfortable. Sirius had come out from his hiding place and was setting up a canopy over Miri, so she was not directly in the hot August sun. Ginny had grabbed oodles of toys from Miri’s nursery, enough to amuse her for days on end, and Ron was using some of them to entertain his twins.

“He’s fine now, it’s passed,” Severus said, and Remus actually rolled onto his back in relief.

“Thank Circe,” Remus mumbled. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, he is his old self. However, he stays on the rules for the rest of the day, just to ensure he is as he appears to be.”

“What changed?” Hermione asked. “Why did it suddenly burn out?”

“Lucius abducted him at quarter past nine. It is now twenty past ten. This was all brought on by the fear of being snatched from us once more,” Severus explained and they all voiced their understanding. 

Harry slipped back into the garden as Phoenix made her way to the kitchen to help Anne and Molly, and Solarin went to get some fresh quills and ink. He made his way over to the blanket and plonked himself down, tickling Miri and teasing Sirius about his need of a haircut. They all stared at him for a few seconds before a few of them shrugged and they carried on with what they were doing.

Hermione took to helping Remus and Solarin with their research, finding the whole thing fascinating, which left Ron and Ginny amusing the four week old twins, something Ron seemed to enjoy tremendously. The youngest Weasley son had taken to fatherhood like a duck to water. Harry and Sirius entertained Miri, encouraging her to use her magic as one of the exercises Moody had set to strengthen her. Severus settled into easy conversation with Charlie, the two of them talking about possible careers for the former dragon tamer.

“Hey, Harry, can I play with your dragon set?” Ginny asked, bored with tickling Catherine and Joseph.

“Of…” Harry was cut off by a scream and the tinkle of breaking glass from the house, followed by a string of colourful swear words from Solarin.

“What on earth?” Hermione questioned.

“No idea, maybe Nix accidentally splashed her with cold water or something,” Harry suggested. “What was I saying?”

“Dragon set,” Ron supplied.

“Oh, right. Yes, Ginny, of course you can. It’s in my room, on the table under the window. Help yourself.”

“Thanks, Harry,” she said and scrambled to her feet, heading towards the back door. She had just disappeared through it when a fuming Solarin came storming out, berating a man Harry had never seen before. 

He looked younger than Severus, which didn’t really help Harry much. He appeared to be in his twenties, but appearances could be deceiving. His boyish grin and baby face made him seem much younger than Harry suspected he really was. He had honey eyes and floppy brown hair, and was very thin. He was good looking though. He looked very attractive in his dark trousers and orange shirt, which was rolled up at the sleeves to his elbows and unbuttoned to the middle button, revealing a tanned hairless chest. Harry wondered who he was. Solarin must know him, she never told off people she had just met. Well, not like this.

“I mean, of all the fucking stupid, irresponsible, dangerous things to do! Use the floo, man! Do not just Apparate into a persons kitchen! What are you trying to do? Kill me! You’re a healer, you’re meant to save lives, not end them!” she fumed. She walked as she spoke, reaching the blanket and shoving the quills and ink she was carrying into Remus’ hands before she really rounded on the man.

He was smiling sheepishly and Harry took an instant liking to him, whoever he was.

“What if it had been Remus you had scared shitless? Your rule, not ours! He has to stay calm! Fine job, you popping up like that!” she scolded, advancing on him until he was standing in one of the flowerbeds. “I could have killed you! My magic could have exploded and I could have killed you!”

“I’m sorry, I should have thought. I did intend to end up in the hallway, but I’ve never been here before so I got a little…misplaced,” he said quickly.

She took a few deep breaths before she slapped him on the arm. “I’ll forgive you this time, but don’t you ever do that again. I won’t be held responsible for my actions next time.”

He nodded and grinned as she allowed him to move towards the blanket. 

“Einstein here decided to Apparate in unannounced,” she said, jerking a thumb at the man as she threw herself onto the blanket, savagely grabbing some papers. 

“Hello, Sam,” Severus said and Harry stared at the man. 

This was Sam? This was Remus’ healer? He hadn’t expected him to be so young, or happy. He had imagined someone old and grumpy, like Madame Pomfrey. She was strict and Harry had assumed the much talked about Sam to be the same, what with The Rules. But he looked like a nice man. He certainly seemed to smile a lot. 

“Hello,” Sam said, dropping his black leather bag at the edge of the blanket and moving forwards to shake hands with Severus.

“You finished with patients already?” Sirius asked.

“I have no appointment patients for today. I had Polly clear my schedule so I could come and spend the day with Remus,” Sam explained, his hands in his pockets.

“Why? What are you going to do to me?” Remus demanded nervously, trying to shrink into his pillows, and Sam laughed.

“Nothing, I swear. Well, I will need to examine you, but it can wait until later. No, I came to spend the day to see how you’re getting on. I felt it important to observe your daily life now the restrictions are in place, see how you’re getting on with them, answer any questions you and your family might have about them. That is, if you feel comfortable with me being here for the day,” Sam explained.

“Oh,” Remus said. He glanced at Harry and then Severus, the Potions Master nodding. “Then by all means, pull up a patch. I’ll introduce you to the pack.” He motioned to the blanket and Sam smiled, taking a cross-legged seat.

“I already know Severus, Solarin and Sirius, so that saves you three of them.”

“The redhead with Severus is Charlie, Nixie’s boyfriend, and the other one with the twin babies is Ron, Harry’s friend,” Remus said, motioning to the two. Sam nodded at them, smiling.

“This is Hermione, Ron’s wife and the mother of those beautiful twins, who’s names are Catherine and Joseph,” Solarin said, stroking a curl away from Hermione’s face.

“Are you the witch who managed to surprise a midwife who had been delivering babies for fourty years?” Sam asked with a wicked wolfish grin and Hermione blushed.

“Yes, I am. We didn’t know it was going to be twins,” she admitted.

“And beautiful twins they are too, just like their mother.” Hermione did a very good impression of a light bulb and Remus rubbed her shoulder.

“Don’t flirt with a married woman young enough to be your daughter,” Remus joked and Sam gave a start of mock offence.

“Me? I wouldn’t do such a thing. Frankly, I’m appalled you would even think such a thing,” Sam argued, but his infectious grin won through and he laughed. “All right, I’m guilty. But I flirt with all beautiful women, it’s a given.”

“You don’t flirt with me. Am I not beautiful enough for you, Sam?” Solarin teased.

“You are a gorgeous woman, but you have many men in your life who would not hesitate to do me damage if I made a move on you. Besides, it is just wrong for me to flirt with the girl who once brought me a frog she had grown from a tadpole and said it was because I was a funny doggy,” Sam said with an expression of remembrance. “You said he would keep me company.”

Solarin was giggling, twirling a quill between her fingertips. “What ever happened to that frog?”

“My neighbours dog ate it. He decided it was a chew toy. Poor Taddy,” Sam said with a hand over his heart, making them all laugh.

“Have you met Molly yet?” Remus asked.

“I have, she’s folding laundry with Anne and a little blonde who was half buried by a sheet,” Sam said. “I got a muffled hello.”

“Nixie. Before I forget, any news on my test results?” Solarin asked.

“Not yet. The lab is having a little trouble getting through your magic to analyse the findings, but they’re working on it. We should have them soon,” Sam assured and she nodded. “So, who’s left for me to be acquainted with?”

“The ones who are here who you have yet to be introduced to are the little one and the baby laying beside Sirius,” Remus said and Sam peered at the boy, who was lying on his back, head on a pile of pillows, with a tiny baby girl sitting on his chest. 

The boy didn’t appear to be much older than his mid-teens. He had messy black hair and the brightest green eyes Sam had ever seen. He was covered from the neck down, and Sam wondered if he was a werewolf like he was. It could be possible, Remus’ pack contained a lot of different people, this one could be a stray they had taken in. Then it hit him that this might be Harry. Which would make the baby Miri. He would wait for confirmation of that though. The baby girl was the boys double, she had the same dark hair, though hers was corkscrew curls instead of a birds nest. They had the same eyes, and they were both very pale. 

“This is Harry,” Sirius said and Sam grinned.

“Harry? I finally get to meet your son?” he asked Remus.

“Yes, you finally get to meet him, and his daughter, Miri. And, if she ever comes up for air, you can meet Nixie too, the little blonde half buried by the sheet,” Remus said and Sam patted his leg in thanks.

Sam had wanted to meet the children who had finally given Remus his dream of being a father. He was getting his chance, at long last.

“Hello, Harry,” Sam said. “It is a pleasure to finally meet you. Remus has told me so much about you and Miri. Such a special little girl, but Remus didn’t do her justice when he was telling me what she looks like. She is absolutely gorgeous.”

Harry beamed, sitting up and turning Miri so Sam could see her properly. 

“Thank you. Would you like to hold her?” Harry offered. Severus took it as a sign of Harry fully emerging from his regression, and breathed a sigh of relief. Charlie rubbed his shoulder to comfort him. They all knew how hard it was to see Harry so bad again, and couldn’t imagine how Severus was able to deal with it so well.

“I would love to, if you’re okay with it.”

“Sure.”

Sam scooted closer and accepted the tiny girl, sitting her on his knee and smiling at her. She gurgled at him and tried to make a grab for the gold pendant he wore. 

“Hello, Miri.” He chuckled as she stuck her thumb in her mouth, looking at him with her searching emerald orbs, waving her free fist in apparent excitement. 

She stared at him, and then looked around at all the others, her gaze landing on Remus. She looked between the two as if she couldn’t understand why it wasn’t Remus holding her. She giggled and patted Sam’s hands, making sure he was not going to drop her. She stared at his honey eyes and kicked in excitement.

“Are you measuring me up, angel?” Sam said, a knowing look passing between he and Severus. 

Solarin had picked up what he was too and Severus had explained it to her as best he could. She called him a funny doggy and worried that no one would play with him because they didn’t like funny doggies. Severus had brought her for a check up a few weeks before she started Hogwarts and she had arrived with Taddy the frog, saying that he would be Sam’s friend and keep him company.

“Her barriers!” Harry said, looking apologetic. “Her barriers are down, she’s reading you.”

Sam nodded in understanding and handed her back, watching with fascination as Harry lifted her up to look her in the eye.

“No, sweetheart. No look, no see,” Harry commanded and she waved her fist for a moment more before she fell still, leaning towards him. He sat her securely in his lap before he gave her the green stuffed dragon, the tail of which she began to suck on.

“Impressive,” Sam appraised. “Does she do it every time?”

“No, sometimes she has a little trouble with it, but she’s getting better,” Harry replied.

“Can she do any of the things Solarin can yet?”

“I don’t know,” Harry said, looking at his sister-in-law. “Can she?”

Solarin smiled at the baby girl, assessing her. Sam had accepted Joseph from Ron and Ginny had returned with the toy dragons before she spoke.

“We could test it,” she offered.

“What do you mean, test it?” Charlie asked.

“Well, I would do some of my tricks and we could see if she copies them. She learnt to summon by watching Harry do it, and learnt the barriers by watching me do it. It’s a fair assumption to think she would copy my tricks,” she explained.

Sam couldn’t believe it. Not only was he meeting Remus’ much talked about family, he would get a chance to see Solarin’s range of abilities and Miri’s. He had only ever heard of Solarin’s so called tricks from Moody, Dumbledore and Severus. He had never actually seen them. He was thrilled.

Severus sniggered at Sam’s excitement and wondered if he would actually burst with it if Harry agreed.

Harry glanced over at Severus. “Is it all right? Is it okay for her to do that, for Miri to push herself like that?” he asked and Severus nodded.

“If she is unable to do it, she will not try because they are new to her. There will be no nosebleeds from these, if she can do it. If she is not yet developed enough, she will simply sit there looking confused,” Severus reassured. “Do you want to try it, love?”

Harry tilted his head, glancing between the two augurs. “Yes,” he said finally. “But I want you over here with me while she tries.”

Severus stood up and made his way over the expanse of fabric, sitting down and pulling Harry to lean against him, secure between his legs.

“Ready?” Solarin asked.

“Yes,” Harry said.

“All right then. Remus, do not touch anything Miri or I may produce. It will be made of pure magic, so don’t even go there,” she advised and Remus nodded, propping up a wall of cushions as protection against anything that might get loose. “Right, what am I doing first?”

“Can you still conjure balls of light?” Severus asked and she giggled. 

“I haven’t done one of those in years! What made you think of those?”

“It was me,” Harry revealed. “Severus gave me the memory of the picnic the three of us had with my mum as a birthday present. You made balls of light while Severus talked with my mum. You accidentally hit me on the head with one that changed colour and gave me a small red one as an apology.”

She spluttered for a moment, and then smiled. “That was a fun afternoon. So, a ball of light?” Harry nodded. “Big, small, one colour or many colours?”

“Small red one.”

She nodded and caught Miri’s attention before she rubbed her hands together in a circular motion, gradually moving them apart to create a tennis ball sized orb of red light. She bounced it between her hands before offering it to Miri.

“Miri do it, Miri play,” she instructed and the baby stared at it for a moment, before she made her hands glow red. “Good girl, Miri.”

Sam watched open mouthed as the two augurs interacted. This was unique, the two of them should not exist at the same time. But here they both were, and it was a blessing for Miri to have someone teach her how to do all of this. Severus had told him how hard it had been for Solarin. No one wanted that for Miri. Miri voiced protest as Solarin chucked the ball at Charlie, the redhead throwing it back and forth with Ginny, but Harry soothed her with a kiss to her cheek and she gurgled at Solarin for the next game.

Miri managed to give Severus an electric shock and turn her hands blue as Solarin conjured blue electricity between her two hands, making it dance between her fingertips. The baby was able to copy the woman fully as she made a flower open and close of its own accord, and when she made some twigs dance, all without a wand. It was quite impressive that Miri could do the same as a twenty three year old Solarin at only three months.

Solarin created a ball of flames in her hand, after surmising that Miri would probably not be able to do this one, and Harry yelped as Miri grabbed his hand, her touch blazing. She had managed to heat her skin, but not to produce actual flames. She left a tiny handprint shaped burn on his skin.

“Let’s not do that one again,” Harry suggested as Sam pulled out a healing balm.

“Here, let me take a look,” Sam urged and Harry yanked his hand away from him.

“Harry will only let Severus heal him,” Remus explained at the hurt and confused expression. “It is not personal, he is not even aware of your condition.”

“What condition?” Ron asked as Sam surrendered the balm to Severus, the Potions Master smiling at the healer as he rubbed it in to Harry’s hand. Sam nodded as Remus looked to him for permission.

“Sam is a werewolf,” Remus stated. “He is biologically part of this pack, he was turned by Greyback in his youth, like I was.”

“You’re like Remus?” Hermione asked, her eyes glinting.

“Yes,” Sam said warily. 

“What pack position are you?” Hermione asked, Ron rolling his eyes.

“I’m…I’m an…an om-omega,” Sam stuttered, unsure of her intentions. Was she going to use the information against him? Was she trying to humiliate him in some way? His condition had been used to hurt him by others too many times before for him to be comfortable at this unexpected grilling.

“Isn’t that the lowest member?” she asked and Remus nodded, smiling at her. “Doesn’t that make it hard to treat Remus, what with Remus being an alpha? Biologically, isn’t Remus your alpha?”

Sirius dissolved in a fit of laughter at the terror and confusion written across Sam’s face. “Hermione is a Gryffindor, but has the mind of a Ravenclaw. She’s a very bright witch, hungry for knowledge,” Sirius explained and Sam sighed, falling back to lean on one hand in relief, holding Joseph to his chest with the other.

“I’m sorry, Hermione, I thought you were going to say something nasty,” Sam apologised as he released a hungry Joseph to her. “I should have known better, considering you’re in Remus’ pack. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologise, mate,” Ron said, as Ginny ran inside to fetch a bottle for Joseph. Hermione had chosen not to breast feed the twins. “She does this all the time, pushing for information before warning her target. She’s a blooming sponge.”

“Probably not wise to use the word ‘mate’, Ron, not to Sam,” Solarin warned. “I think that is enough of me playing these games with Miri, as impressive as she is. It might go a bit better in a few months. Sorry about your hand, Harry. I honestly didn’t think she’d be able to do anything. I couldn’t heat my hands until my early teens.”

“It’s okay, Severus healed it,” Harry said as he placed Miri under the canopy, giving her the stuffed snitch as a reward for doing so much. “Why should he not use the word mate?”

“Can we not use it anymore? Say…orange instead,” Sam requested, rolling an errant shirtsleeve once more.

Severus snorted. “Very well. It is not wise for you to mention…orange to Sam because he is a bit of a…”

“Heartbreaker?” Solarin supplied and Sam sniggered. 

“Appropriate,” Severus praised. “The good healer has not found a lasting orange yet, he is still searching. Any person he encounters is a potential orange to Sam, his wolf cannot discern who is and is not suitable. He, shall we say, tries them on for size.”

“You sleep around?” Charlie asked and Sam doubled up. “Sorry, bad word choice. Weasley family trait.”

“No, no, it’s fine. It’s probably the best way to put it,” Sam chuckled. “I do get around. The chase is too much fun to give up. But saying that word is not a good idea, it makes my wolf flare.”

“It’s not uncommon for a werewolf to have many sexual partners,” Severus said. “Remus and Sirius are an oddity. They are true oranges. It is very rare for a werewolf to find his true orange.”

“So, an omega? Does it pose problems when treating Remus?” Hermione asked, undeterred but loving all the information she was gathering.

“Not really. He’s a pretty calm alpha, he submits to my healing. He allows it, but he and I are very clear on who is the dominant. My infection developed as me being a submissive wolf, Remus’ developed into him being a dominant wolf. It means that I cannot treat him unless he allows it. We’ve managed to develop a good system of me asking instead of just barrelling ahead.”

They chatted for a while, Hermione plying Sam with questions and the healer answering them as best he could, with help from the other men around him. Sirius moved over the blanket, laid back and stroked Remus’ hair, listening to the conversation and sniggering at Hermione’s determination to dissect the inner workings of a werewolf. He knew she had not grilled Remus like this because he was someone she already knew about, her research in her third year had answered her questions to a point, but it was only a matter of time, now she had two werewolves in her sights, before Remus was the focus of her attentions as well.

“Daddy, look at what nana taught me!”

Sirius looked up to see Phoenix speeding towards them, her strawberry blonde hair flying out behind her, blackcurrant cordial staining her white top and potato salad smeared across her chin. She looked about six instead of sixteen, but Sirius was too busy grinning at her calling him ‘daddy’ once more to care. He loved it when she did that.

“Obviously she taught you to be a messy eater,” Sirius teased as she flopped down on top of him, waving a paper flower at him. He marvelled at the way she attacked him yet managed to avoid any contact at all with Remus until she was settled.

“No, she showed me how to make a rose out of a paper napkin,” she argued, holding still so Sirius could clean her face with a tissue. “Look, papa.”

Since Phoenix had been changed from being Draco, she had been forced to learn how to do everything again, the body brand new to her. She was getting the hang of it, but she had the occasional messy moment with her food.

“That top’s a goner,” Remus said as he accepted the paper rose from her, smiling at it as she peered down at the stain. “Very pretty flower though.”

“Oops. Sorry,” she mumbled and they laughed at her. 

“It happens. Admittedly, it happens to you more than anyone else in the house. But you have other clothes,” Remus said. “Be nice and say hello to Sam.”

The blonde wriggled around so she was facing the healer, but she was unwilling to give up her place on Sirius’ chest. He was playing with her hair.

Lucius had never been much of a parent. He had insisted on being called ‘father’, pushing Draco away the one time he had tried calling him ‘dad’. He had been cold and distant, always making Draco feel like he wasn’t worthy of being loved. Lucius had denied Draco any affection, physical, verbal or emotional. Since Draco had been revealed as Phoenix, she had become more child like, catching up on the childhood Lucius had denied her. He had refused to see Draco as a child, seeing him instead as a weapon that he could mould and shape. Lucius had removed all toys from Draco at the age of six, and insisted that he became a man at that point. Lucius had been a terrible parent, in Phoenix’ opinion. Narcissa, who had acted the same way, wasn’t any better.

Phoenix was really starting to fall in love with Charlie. Charlie found her reverting into childhood behaviour adorable, and indulged her in it. If she asked to play a game with him, he always agreed immediately. The days where she acted her age were the ones that he would be allowed to kiss her breathless instead of chaste kisses her childish days brought. He loved all sides of her, every single one, and it had risen Sirius and Remus’ acceptance of his relationship with their daughter to the point that they could occasionally sleep in the same bed, but only when Phoenix was having her childish days, with no risk of them getting carried away.

Phoenix thought Sirius and Remus were wicked at being parents. Sirius always tucked her in at night, and Remus always made sure she didn’t burn herself on her dinner. They told her constantly how much they adored her, how precious she was to them. They hugged and played games and patched her up when she lost concentration with a knife and cut herself, or tripped over her own feet and scraped her knee. They allowed her to act like a child when she felt like it, indulging it, and never pushed away her affections. They never yelled, never punished with physical violence or without good reason. Their punishments were usually not allowing her desert, or confiscating her gobstones.

Her daddy and papa were brilliant.

“Hello. I’m Nixie,” she said to the smiling man, holding out her hand as Anne and Molly appeared in the doorway, carrying trays of drinks. 

“Hello, Nixie. I’m Sam Jones, Remus’ healer. He has told me so many good things about you. I feel very privileged to be meeting Remus’ very beautiful daughter,” he said, kissing the back of her hand. She blazed crimson and buried her head in Sirius’ chest as everyone laughed at her.

“Stop embarrassing my granddaughter, you old flirt,” Anne scolded, setting down her tray, and Sam sniggered.

“Force of habit,” Sam defended sheepishly and she immediately began to try smoothing down his hair. Sam had lost his mother in the attack by Greyback that had infected him as a werewolf when he was twelve, and he thoroughly enjoyed being mothered. His father had never remarried, thus it was a welcome experience to be groomed by Anne. The woman had been doing it for years, ever since Remus’ first appointment with Sam, and he decided years ago that she was rather good at it.

“A habit you should be broken of by now,” she said fondly, adjusting his shirt collar so it lay flat. “Are you joining us for lunch?”

“Yes, I’m going to be here for the day, seeing how Remus is getting on with the regulations I set.”

“Oh good. You need a good meal or two, you’re much too thin. You and Remus, both too many bones and not enough padding. Mind you, the whole pack could do with feeding up,” she assessed as Hermione poured Sam a drink.

And just like that, Sam was pulled into the pack, claimed as one of their own.


	6. Chapter Six

The garden was scorching, and Miri was overheating in her sundress, Joseph and Catherine not faring much better. 

Severus kept casting cooling charms on Miri, but they were not very effective at this point. It was so hot that Sirius, Ron and Charlie had gone shirtless, Severus had stripped down to his white wife beater and Solarin had changed from her jeans into a pair of dungarees shorts and a camisole. Only Remus and Sam remained fully clothed. Molly and Anne changed into shorts and t-shirts, Ginny, Phoenix and Hermione changed into shorts and camisoles. There was not a cloud in the sky and it was roasting, even in the shade. It was only half eleven and it was already boiling.

Harry reached over and lifted a sweaty Miri from under her canopy. He carefully stripped her of her dress and fanned her with a piece of Remus’ scrap parchment. When she settled a little, he returned her to her shaded patch in nothing but her nappy and set up her baby gym over her. She squealed in delight and began to use her magic to make the toys above her dance, like she and Solarin had done with the twigs.

Harry huffed at the heat and plucked at the cotton shirt he was wearing. It was sticking to him, as were the soft wool trousers, and his feet felt like they were on fire inside his shoes.

“I’m going to go and change my clothes,” Harry said to Severus.

“Are you sure that is what you want to do?” Severus asked, taking a sip of his lemonade, crunching a piece of ice.

“Yes. I’m okay with it, and it’s too hot in your clothes,” Harry explained. “But I have a problem with it all the same.”

“What problem?”

“Sam and nana have never seen my scars. I was going to put on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. I don’t want to upset them.”

Severus considered it. The day Anne had arrived, Harry had been covered, and he had not worn anything that would have allowed her to see any of the marks, not even the ones on his wrists or neck. The woman seemed unflappable, but how would she handle seeing remnants so extreme? 

Sam was a healer, he had seen some very radical things in his sixteen years on the job. Solarin’s Brand was one of them, along with the scars she had on her back from the time Tobias had beaten her with his belt. Sam had been jarred by the scars the first time, finding it unsettling to see them on a ten year old. Harry was only seventeen and his scars were far more severe and expansive than the augur’s. Would the gentle healer handle so many barbaric scars on one so young?

“I will warn them while you change. This is your home, you should not feel uncomfortable in wearing attire of your choosing,” Severus said and Harry smiled at him. 

Severus got up with him and walked him to the foot of the stairs, before he retrieved several baby bottles of cold water from the fridge for the three overheating infants in the garden. Fred and George had brought Harry some bottles and the assorted equipment to go with them, such as a steriliser, as the weather had gotten warmer again. It was all too easy for the tiny girl to become dehydrated, it was a wise idea to have sterilised water to hand. Ron and Hermione had followed suit. The three infants each had a shelf in the door of the fridge, so no one got mixed up. The bottles were even colour coded. Miri’s were red, Catherine’s were pink and Joseph’s were blue.

Thank God for Arthur Weasley. The brilliant man had procured them some muggle appliances and charmed them to work with magic rather than electricity. It was the only exception to the rule of no magic applied to Remus, and they had referenced the booklet from cover to cover to be sure of that. The kitchen alone now had a fridge freezer and a washing machine, which made life much simpler. The man was a godsend, and even Molly had not complained with his tinkering this time.

He returned to the garden and reclaimed his place, handing Ron and Hermione some of the bottles and cuddling Miri close. She gulped at it, suckling desperately.

“Thirsty girl,” Remus said, piling up his papers. “I forfeit. It is far too hot to work.”

“Hear hear,” Solarin said, plonking her own parchments and books outside the blanket.

“Where’s Harry gone? Is he alright?” Sirius asked, looking up from his tinkering with Harry’s dragon set with Anne and Sam. The three adults had been entranced by it, and Ginny had abandoned it to help her mother with the sorting of the laundry and preparation of lunch, along with Phoenix.

“Harry has gone to change his clothes for something more suited to the hot weather. Sam, I feel it necessary to warn you and Anne of what you will see before he returns,” Severus said, the witch and wizard abandoning the toy to look at him. Severus wondered how best to phrase it, but he was saved by Sirius.

“Harry is covered in scars,” the Animagus said, putting the dragons and their farm set back in their box, the tiny horntail making a bid for freedom, before Hermione caught it for him. “Lucius was very sadistic and caused the damage to him without magic. The only part of Harry that Lucius did not mark is his face. That itself is marked by the curse scar. You need to be aware of it before you see it.”

“How severe are they?” Anne asked warily.

“Barbaric,” Severus answered honestly. “They do not bother him for the most part, and all of us are used to seeing them. But you need to be aware that he considers them proof of how strong he is to have survived Lucius’ treatment. He has been offered the choice to attempt a muggle surgery to remove them but he has opted to keep them. To Harry, they are medals of honour and courage, reminders of how lucky he is. Please, try not to show your disgust of them, if you feel that way, it may have a negative effect on him today.”

Anne nodded but Sam looked confused. 

“Sirius, take Sam to see Harry’s Rules,” Remus said and Sirius motioned to Sam to follow him. The two of them disappeared inside and returned after a few moments.

“Today is the anniversary?” Sam queried and Severus nodded, putting Miri back in her shady patch. “How is he handling it?”

“We got off to a rocky start, but he is doing very well now. He is calm and happy. The real sign of his progress is that he let you touch Miri,” Severus explained, adjusting the gym and canopy over his daughter.

“I see. I wanted to ask you if he would be comfortable with me asking him a few questions,” Sam requested.

“On what topic?”

“His anatomy, being a hermaphrodite. I was contacted by Poppy Pomfrey as a second opinion for your questions to her, and she piqued my interests in the whole legend.”

“Do not use that word in front of Harry,” Remus interrupted. “He does not like it, he won’t handle it, not today. We use the word fable instead of legend.”

Sam nodded. “If it’s not the right day, or he won’t do well with my questions, I can keep them to myself. I will only ask if he feels comfortable with it.”

Severus considered it as he heard Harry’s laughter from the open kitchen window. “I will offer it to him, see if he would handle it. I am unsure of his comfort in that area of conversation at this point, but I will enquire for you,” Severus assured as Harry appeared in the doorway, sucking on an ice lolly and carrying a box of them. 

Harry was in one of Severus’ white wife beaters and a pair of baggy jean shorts that stopped mid-thigh. He hovered in the door for a moment, before Severus nodded that he had warned them. He padded over, the grass tickling his bare feet, and curled into Severus’ embrace, cradled in those long crossed legs. It made quite a nice seat really, he fit perfectly in it, and Severus kept trailing ice cubes over the back of his neck to cool him down. Anne stared at his bare legs and arms for a moment, before she looked away embarrassedly. Sam appeared fascinated with his glass of lemonade.

“It’s okay, you can look at them. I just didn’t want you to be scared by them,” Harry said and they both sighed in relief. “I wanted you to be warned, so they didn’t upset you too much. They can be a little…shocking to people who’ve never seen them before.”

The two of them nodded and Harry passed out the ice lolly’s. Anne busied herself with refilling glasses from the jug, keeping them all hydrated. 

Harry could see Sam’s fingers twitching, as if he wanted to get a closer look. Harry considered it, the thought of Sam touching him, and found he didn’t recoil at the idea. In fact, he didn’t mind at all. Sam had explained to them that he was a submissive wolf, not a dominant. That was the decider for Harry. Remus was a dominant, and he was Sam’s alpha. Sam would only touch his alpha’s pup if the pup allowed it. Rules or no Rules, Remus would be across the blanket and attacking him if he hurt Harry or panicked him. His touch would be hesitant, Remus had revealed that he had told Sam of his abduction, that he was well aware of his lingering quirks. Besides, if he didn’t like it he could always pull away.

“Do you want a closer look at some of them?” Harry offered and Sam jumped in surprise, looking to Remus for explanation.

“Harry has allowed all of the pack a chance to look a little closer at his scars, so they can feel more at ease with them. He is saying that he is comfortable with the idea of you touching him, though he is not yet sure if he will be comfortable once you actually do it. He is offering you the choice, he is willing to try letting you touch him,” Remus clarified, biting off a chunk of his strawberry lolly. Sirius was lying on his front beside Remus, and the werewolf was trailing ice from his drink over Sirius’ bare back.

“Are you sure, Harry? I’m not a real part of the pack, it’s only biology with me,” Sam said quietly and Harry giggled.

“Yes you are. You and Remus are wolf brothers, you have the same sire. That makes you kind of my uncle. And you’ve taken care of Remus, and Sol. That’s what a pack does, it takes care of its own. You’re part of the pack, whether you like it or not. No one escapes this madhouse,” Harry said stubbornly and Sam smiled in amazement.

“When we first adopted Harry, and then Nixie, we explained it all to them, gave them books to read,” Sirius said. “They know all about werewolves. They could probably teach you a few things.”

“I don’t doubt that for a second. It’s only natural for your children to be aware of the condition, I just didn’t realize they would be so clear on it,” Sam said and looked at Harry once more, who was letting Miri suck at his dripping lolly. “Are you sure I can take a closer look?”

“Yup. Well, I might not be comfortable with it once you actually touch me, but I don’t know unless I let you try,” Harry said, taking a bite. “Do you want to?”

“If I’m allowed,” Sam said and Harry smiled at him, beckoning him to move closer to him.

“Do you want to as well, nana?” Harry asked as Sam settled beside Severus, keeping his hands to himself until Harry let him move.

“No, thank you, dear. They’re just skin to me. It’s just a part of you, like that messy hair I would love to take a pair of shears to,” she replied, her amber eyes honest. “I don’t need a closer peep now I know about them.”

“Oh. Okay. Would you like to hold Miri instead then?” Harry offered, smiling at her assessment of his wild tresses, Severus running his fingers through them.

She spluttered, her eyes filling with tears. Harry had not let her hold Miri yet, and she had respected his choice, no matter how much she wanted to cuddle her great granddaughter. “Can I?”

“Sure. Your cold hands might help cool her down,” Harry said, motioning to the icy jug she was holding. “And you haven’t held her yet. I’m sorry about that, it’s nothing personal, you just arrived at a bad time, when I wasn’t at my best. But I’m feeling much better now, so you can hold her if you want to.”

She put the jug down, walked over to him and Harry happily handed her his daughter. She stared in wonder at the tiny girl trying to grab her nose, unable to make a single sound as she wandered over to her son and son-in-law. Sirius smiled and sat up. He pulled her to lean against him as she sat down, looking to Harry for permission to touch Miri. Harry nodded and he tickled her little hands, the baby augur lapping up all the attention.

“Harry, Sam was wondering if you would be all right with a few questions about being a hermaphrodite. Would you be comfortable with that?” Severus mumbled in Harry’s ear, feeding him a bite of his orange lolly. He kissed Harry’s neck as he tilted his head to the side, considering it. “If not, he will not ask.”

“No, that’s alright. I feel fine now, not panicking or anything. But you might need to help me if I get embarrassed or he wanders into a bad topic,” Harry calculated. He giggled. “Your lips are cold.”

“Ice kisses.” He kissed his neck again. “And as for helping you, I would not have it any other way,” Severus said and Harry kissed him. Severus turned to the werewolf. “Harry is comfortable with your questions, but he may not answer all of them. If you begin to ask things he is unhappy with I will put a stop to this.”

“I understand. I’ll try not to ask things that you dislike answering, Harry,” Sam promised and Harry nodded before he uncurled his legs and offered them to the healer.

“Look and ask away,” Harry said, Severus cradling him, the two of them stealing bites of each others lolly’s.

Sam looked down at the pale legs resting on his knee and hesitantly reached out to turn one, getting a better look at one of the scars on Harry’s ankle. There were so many scars, it was incredible that Harry had lived through five months of treatment that would cause something so severe. They were everywhere, absolutely everywhere. The soles of his feet, his toes, the tops of his feet, his ankles, shins, knees, thighs, arms, throat, neck, shoulders, wrists, hands. The list was endless and he hadn’t even seen all of Harry. He had never seen anything like it. There was evidence of burning, whipping, slashing, carving, restraints, branding, scalding and everything else imaginable. There wasn’t a word Sam could think of to describe what he was seeing.

“Go on, you can say it, he won’t be upset,” Sirius said at the expression of incredulity on the healers face. 

Ron was watching the whole scene warily, anxious to protect his friend. He remembered Harry letting he and Hermione take a look, the way Harry had merely shrugged at Hermione’s tears over them, at Ron’s anger. He hoped Harry would take whatever Sam threw out as nonchalantly.

“These are…they’re…” Sam struggled to find the word. There didn’t seem to be one to cover it and he was terrified of upsetting the cub with whatever came out.

“Barbaric, sadistic, horrific, cruel, vicious, brutal, heartless, inhuman, inhumane, merciless, horrendous, appalling, all of the above. Take your pick, I don’t mind,” Harry reeled off, giggling and wriggling his toes as Sam’s elegant fingers slid over them.

“I’ll go with all of the above,” Sam breathed, running his fingers over a burn scar on Harry’s knee. “You survived five months of this?”

“Yup. Then Draco found me, and he and Severus saved me. Except, now Draco is Nix.”

“You are a very special person.”

“I fit with the pack. We’re all special in our own ways.” He laughed. “Professor McGonagall always said I had sheer dumb luck,” Harry said, smiling at Ron, who looked nervous. “Relax, Ron, I’m okay.” He was seriously undermined in that statement when he gasped in pain, grabbing his stomach. 

“Are you alright?” Sam asked worriedly, yanking his hands away from Harry’s legs in case he was the cause.

“He’s fine. Just cramps,” Severus supplied and Remus chuckled as Sam’s eyes went as big as saucers.

“Cramps? You mean he…?”

“Yes, I bleed,” Harry replied. “Severus, when can I have another potion?”

“Now, if you need one,” Severus offered and Harry nodded. Hermione clambered to her feet and ruffled Harry’s messy hair as she passed, assuring him he would not have to say thank you when she returned. Harry was very free with his expressions of gratitude and apology, even if they were not always needed.

“Next question?” Harry groaned out, trying to distract himself. “Fucking hell!” He buried his head in Severus’ chest, screaming.

“Wait until he’s had the potion,” Ron advised. “You won’t get anything until he’s had it.”

Sam nodded and watched anxiously as Harry wept against Severus’ chest, curling his knees up to his chest. 

“He never screamed like this in Hogwarts, not even when that asinine imbecile Lockhart removed his bones and he had to re-grow them,” Severus said, rubbing Harry’s back. “Gritting his teeth?”

“Yup. Never let it be said that Harry isn’t determined,” Ron joked and then winced as Harry screamed at a particularly high pitch. “He’s a better man than me. I would have given up and spilled my guts to anyone, even the Snake King, if they would just make that stop.”

“He would have killed you and found it a funny way to stop the pain of your insides shredding themselves,” Harry gasped out jokingly. “Christ!”

Hermione returned and handed the potion to Severus before she reclaimed her position next to Ron a little way away, plucking up a fussy Joseph.

It took a few moments for Harry to stop screaming enough to grab the potion and gulp it down eagerly. He wrapped his arms around Severus’ neck and buried his head in his shoulder as he waited for it to work. Severus’ strong hands stroked his back, tracing his spine, and Harry slowly relaxed as the pain passed.

“I hate being half girl,” Harry grumbled as he raised his head. 

Severus kissed him, slow and sweet. “You only hate this part of being half girl,” Severus corrected and Harry nodded as he settled in his previous position, smiling at Sam as he gave him his legs once more.

“You should have been here last night, I really screamed then,” Harry said honestly. “I’m sorry if I scared you.”

“I was worried I had caused the pain,” Sam admitted, rubbing the back of his neck.

“No, you didn’t hurt me. You can ask me more questions, if you want to,” Harry offered, poking his ribs with his toes. Sam giggled. Oh, so Sam was ticklish? Harry continued to tickle him with his toes as he pulled out his wand from his pocket and whispered a tickling charm, sniggering as Sam fell to his back, clutching his ribs and laughing hysterically.

“Sam?” Remus asked in confusion. Everyone was confused, until Solarin looked up from where she had been decorating Charlie’s bare back with a set of felt tips. 

Sirius had commented that Bill might be upset about her straddling Charlie’s backside but she had laughed, telling him that Charlie wasn’t her type and Bill found it amusing when she took his brothers on and won. She had wrestled Charlie onto his front, quite impressive when you considered the man used to wrestle dragons for a living.

“Undo it, Harry,” she said calmly. “Your signature is all over him, I can taste it. Undo it.”

Harry sniggered as he was found out and he released the spell. Most of the pack was chuckling at him, except Severus, who was sighing.

“We really need to find you some way to exorcise this love of misusing your magic,” Severus said.

“I thought you liked some of the effects? I only do it for good reasons…mostly, and it’s good for me to exercise my magic, you said so yourself,” Harry argued. “And you have to admit that my misuse has given me better control. You wanted that, you wanted me to get my control back after five months of no magic.”

“Give it up, Severus,” Anne said, cuddling a now sleeping Miri. “He’s got a very good set of points against you.”

Severus huffed in annoyance before he smiled and nodded, kissing Harry. “Alright, I’ll admit that it does serve a purpose. Now, will you let the nice healer ask questions without using him as a guinea pig for your tricks?” 

Harry nodded, shooting an apologetic glance at the still chuckling Sam.

“It’s perfectly alright. I treat a lot of little ones. That was one of the more pleasant tricks played on me,” Sam assured. “I utterly delight in a good giggle every now and again.”

“See?” Harry asked Severus.

“Pipe down,” Severus said through his smile. 

“Sol, what does my signature taste like?” Harry asked and she looked thoughtful for a minute.

“Strawberry syrup,” she said and he smiled. “It’s quite a nice one, really. Severus’ tastes like strawberry ice cream and Miri’s tastes like fresh strawberries. Quite the little family.”

“That’s so cool,” Harry appraised. He turned to Sam. “Do you have more questions?”

“Yes, I do. Harry, I noticed that you have no leg or underarm hair. Do you remove it or does it not grow?” Sam asked, cautiously running his thumb over a scar that ran the whole length of Harry’s shin.

“I don’t have any body hair at all, just…umm…a little…well…Severus, help.”

“Harry only has a light scattering of body hair on the top of his thighs and between them, which he has covered,” Severus supplied.

“Does it bother you?” Sam asked, relaxing into this freedom he had been given. He continued to throw questioning glances at Remus, ensuring his alpha was still alright with him questioning his cub.

“No. It did when I first noticed that I was different, but it’s just part of me, who I am.”

“Have you always passed as a male? I mean, have you ever had someone confuse you for being a girl, maybe when you were young?”

“No, never. I’ve been called elfin, delicate and petite, to name just a few, but I’ve never had someone think me female.” Harry glanced up at his husband. “Come to think of it, I’ve been called all of those by you since you first claimed me.”

Severus smiled and kissed his curse scar. “They are all true. I have also called you beautiful,” Severus agreed, making Harry giggle and blush.

“I slept in the boys dorm in Hogwarts, and I wore the boys uniform. I’ve always used the boys shower rooms, and the men’s room, not the ladies,” Harry said. “I consider myself male, and I prefer to be referred to that way.”

“Only natural as it’s the way you’ve always considered yourself,” Sam said, Harry offering him his arm. Sam stared at the scar on his wrist, the mutilation. “This one is worse than the others.”

“That one was a constant wound,” Harry supplied. “He…he…well…that one was caused by…umm….it was…” Harry trailed off and looked up at Severus.

“The ones on his wrists were caused by manacles with serrated ridges inside. They were worn constantly by Harry throughout his time as a captive,” Severus said diplomatically, carefully selecting his words to not upset his husband. “They were used as unremitting restraints from the very first moment of his tribulations.”

“Thank you, Severus,” Harry said and Severus kissed the top of his head. “I have a little trouble with talking about some things, especially today, so Severus fills it in for me.”

“Sign of an attentive husband.” Severus smiled at him. “Harry, I wonder, could I see the ones on your shoulders?” Sam asked cautiously, panicking slightly as Remus tensed. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked, it’s alright, forget I said anything.”

“It’s all right, I don’t mind,” Harry assured. “Why did you get upset?”

“Umm…Remus stiffened,” the honey eyed man admitted quietly.

“It was not your request that caused that. It is that particular section of marks,” Remus revealed. “Can you show him, Harry? He’ll understand if he gets a closer look.”

Harry shot him a confused glance but nodded, shifting so his shoulders were within Sam’s reach. As soon as he did, Sam growled.

“A human made these?” the healer asked Remus.

“Yes. They were made by a human,” Remus confirmed.

“They look like…”

“Yes. It does appear that way but I assure you that they are all made by the same human, the same wizard. He made every scar on my cub.”

Sirius seemed to be the only one who was not puzzled. He was stroking Remus’ shoulder, it appeared that he was soothing him, or maybe calming. Harry wondered why Sam was asking that, why Remus was saying it. What was going on? Of course they were made by a human, what else could they have been made by? Lucius made all of his scars, what was special about the bites?

“Why are his bites special? Why are they different than the other scars?” Charlie requested, and there was silence for a moment before Sirius answered.

“They look like an Infection Mark,” the Animagus said gently. Severus made a sound of understanding, and Solarin and Anne nodded, but everyone else was still baffled.

“What’s that?” Harry asked and Remus chuckled. 

“Missed that out in your reading, pup?”

“It’s not in my reading, I swear. What is it?”

“An Infection Mark is the scar of when a person was infected, when they were bitten. I have one, as does Sam. Every werewolf has one. Your marks are identical to ours.”

Remus watched his cub as he considered the information, running his fingers over his shoulders. Very few magical people had ever seen his mark. It was in a place that he could hide, and he had not chosen to show it, he kept it covered at all times. It was risky to show it, people often reacted badly to a mark, the ones who recognised it for what it was. He had not shown it to his children and they had not asked to see it. He would only show it if they asked. 

“Are you saying we match?” Harry posed eventually.

Remus and Sirius smiled. “Yes, pup, that’s right. You and Remus and Sam have the same marks, you match,” Sirius agreed.

“Where are they? Where are your marks?”

“Mine is on my stomach, and Remus’ is on his arm,” Sam supplied. “Would you like to see mine?”

Harry nodded and Sam looked to his alpha for permission. At Remus’ nod, he shed his shirt, his fingers shaking as he slipped the buttons through their holes. He left it in a pile on the blanket and reclined on his side, allowing Harry a clear view. He watched as Harry reached out a tentative hand and then pulled it back, as if he had been scolded for it.

“It’s alright, you can get a better look,” he assured and the pale hand came forth once more. Harry’s touch was ghost like as he hesitantly slid his fingers over the jagged edges of it. It almost tickled.

When Sam had received it, he had been lying on his side in the garden at home, the summer before his second year at Hogwarts. His mother had been showing him the stars and the big round moon. Greyback had come running through the bushes, startling them. They hadn’t had time to move, it had been too fast. The huge wolf had picked him up in his mouth and shaken him like a rag doll. His mother had been angry, furious. She hit Greyback and the wild creature had ripped her to pieces. 

Sam would always remember the way his father had patched him up, the way he had argued with Headmaster Dippett so he could stay at Hogwarts (an argument he lost, meaning Sam was home schooled but it was the thought that counted), the way he had bought him hundreds of toy wolves to amuse him, to raise his comfort levels with being different. His father had been both parents for him, and he had been really good at it. Harry’s gentle question brought him out of his remembrances.

“Does it hurt?” 

“No. It’s just there, like yours. People like me, we hide it. Some people don’t like seeing marks like this, it’s easier to hide them,” he clarified. “We worry about how other people will react to them, just the way you worry about yours.”

Harry peered at it. It was big, it covered most of Sam’s right side between his ribs and his hip. He had obviously been very small when it happened for Greyback to have taken that much of him in his jaws. 

“How old were you?”

“I was twelve.”

Harry pulled his hand away and tilted his head to the side, observing his sort of uncle. The man was nervous, ashamed of his mark. Harry thought it was wrong. He wasn’t ashamed of his, Sam shouldn’t be either. Remus looked ashamed too, and Harry suddenly realized that his father had never been shirtless in front of him. Remus was always covered. Was he really that ashamed of it?

“Is this why you haven’t gone shirtless?” Harry asked. “It’s hot today, and all of us have changed our clothes, or taken some off. You and Remus haven’t revealed yourselves, you‘re the only ones who are still fully clothed. And I’ve never seen Remus shirtless. Is it because of the marks?”

Sam stared down at the blanket. He hadn’t expected the young man to be so blunt, so honest, so observant. He had assumed that he would be more timid than this. He had seen evidence of that shyness, and proof of his reluctance around new people. He hadn’t considered that Harry might accept him, all of him, so quickly.

“Yes, pup. That’s why we remained covered,” Remus concurred quietly. “That’s why I’ve never walked around without a shirt, even in the middle of the night.”

Harry chuckled. “You don’t have to, you know. They’re just a bit of you, like mine are a bit of me. If you want to go shirtless, I don’t have a problem with it, and I don’t think anyone else will,” Harry stated and the other inhabitants of the blanket nodded.

Remus smiled shyly and had Sirius remove his shirt for him, his hands were shaking too fiercely for him to do it himself. At first, he put his hand over his mark, embarrassed by it. But he should have known that Harry wouldn’t let him feel that way.

Harry smiled sympathetically and stood up, walking over to Remus. He sat down in front of him and reached out, slowly easing his fingers under Remus’. His fathers mark was on his right bicep, high up, just under his shoulder. He stroked the back of his hand with his thumb as he gently edged his hand away, placing it over a bite scar he had in exactly the same place. He traced Remus’. It looked like Greyback had tried to bite his arm off. It wasn’t as big as Sam’s, their sire had not gotten as good a grip on Remus, but it was just as jagged, and had the same ridges, proving that they were made by the same wolf.

“Don’t be ashamed of it. It’s just who you are, just a part of you. I have three days a month where I’m not myself either. We match. I match my alpha. You have the same mark as me, in the same place. We’re family,” Harry whispered, green eyes meeting amber. Remus snorted in relief before he pulled Harry into a hug.

The two werewolves didn’t hide themselves again, not around their pack.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Harry grinned as the picnic was brought out. There were so many choices, so many things he loved to eat. It reminded him of the very first time he had eaten at Hogwarts, and it was made all the better by having Ron and Hermione with him.

There were sandwiches of all varieties, cold meats, mixed salad, coleslaw, potato salad, crisps, sweets, cookies, jellies, cakes, hamburgers, hotdogs, chicken, roasted peppers, corn on the cob, fruit, pork pies, sausage rolls, and all manner of other things. 

It shouldn’t have panicked him, he should have been absolutely fine. But he wasn’t. As soon as he reached for the sandwich Molly offered him, he began to shake.

“Harry?” Severus questioned, seeing the blood drain from his husbands face. He was holding him in an instant, trying to calm him enough for him to tell him what had brought this on. He motioned to Sirius, and the Animagus summoned a calming draught, pouring it into Harry’s empty glass. 

“S-Severus,” Harry stuttered, gripping at his arm.

“What happened, love? Come on, tell me what triggered this.”

“Th-the sand-sandwich…it’s…I…”

“Deep breaths, come on, in and out, nice and slow,” Severus instructed. Sam looked absolutely terrified, and the rest of the pack were watching worriedly as Harry did what he was told. Sirius came forwards and pushed the glass into Severus’ hand. Severus tilted the glass for Harry, helping him get it down.

“The…the sandwich…it’s filled w-with mar-marmalade…h-he gave me…t-toast w-with mar-marmalade,” Harry explained, and Severus kissed his temple, stroking his hair, rocking him.

“Remove the marmalade sandwiches,” Severus instructed, and Ron grabbed them, hurrying them back into the house. 

“Is he alright?” Sam asked Remus and the man nodded, setting down his glass of ice water and beckoning his healer closer so he could give reasons for his cubs panic.

“When Harry was taken, Lucius fed him toast just before he first violated him. As Harry has just revealed, he put marmalade on the toast,” Remus explained in a whisper so low, only the two werewolves could hear it. “We didn’t know of the marmalade before. If we had, those sandwiches would not have been prepared. Harry used to have very frequent panic attacks in the beginning, but they have not happened for a few months now. The anniversary has triggered them once more. Severus handles him when he’s like this, he is the only one Harry will let touch him during a panic. The potion is a specialist calming draught that Severus developed for him. It is weaker than a regular draught, but enough to help him. He will be back to his regular self in a few minutes. I know it can be a little jarring to watch, but Severus can handle this. Do not try to help, you will only make him worse.”

After a few minutes, Harry calmed and took a great gulp of air before he pulled Severus into a passionate kiss, ensuring his control over the situation. He pulled back and looked around at his family, scanning the blanket and their faces.

“I’m okay now, I’m all right. Just a wobbly moment,” Harry announced and they all heaved a sigh of relief, especially Sam. Poor man. Though he seemed to be taking his panic attack rather well for someone who had never seen one before.

They all helped themselves to the food, Anne insisting everyone take more, and Severus cradled Harry close.

“Are you going to eat willingly, love, or do I have to force feed you?” Severus asked softly, making it clear that Harry still had to follow his rules.

“I’ll eat. Umm…Severus…I didn’t eat my breakfast,” Harry admitted, picking at a loose thread on his shorts. “I just pushed it around, made it look like I ate some. I’m sorry.”

Severus chuckled. “Did you really think you got away with that?” he asked and Harry looked up at him in surprise. “I saw you, love. That is why I made you eat the bacon roll. You could not take five potions on an empty stomach, they simply would not stay down. You had to eat, and you would only do so if I used bribery.”

Harry stared at him for a moment before he laughed. “You think of everything,” he giggled. “But I really am hungry now, I’ll eat this time. I’ll clear my plate.”

“That is good to hear.”

Harry accepted the plate Solarin fixed for him and sat in Severus’ lap as he began to tuck in. He only got as far as taking a bite of his hamburger when Miri began to whimper.

Harry groaned. “Why does she insist on eating when I do?” Harry asked, setting down his plate and picking her up. “No one minds if I feed her, do they?”

“Not at all,” Anne assured.

Harry cradled her in his crossed legs as he pulled of his vest, and then latched her on.

“Is she not on a regular feeding schedule?” Sam asked, gazing at the crosshatch pattern of scars across Harry’s ribs. 

Harry noticed that Molly had ensured that there was a separate plate of rare burgers and other meats. Sam and Remus seemed to be enjoying them, but it made Harry shudder. They looked almost raw, but he knew it was part of being a werewolf to like meat done like that. It was not something that he would be eating though.

“We tried, but it didn’t take. She won’t nurse when we want her to, so I do it when she asks,” Harry replied as he managed to take a mouthful of potato salad one handed.

“Have you had any problems breastfeeding?”

Harry took a bite of cold chicken and made sure he had swallowed it before he answered. “No. There are no problems with it, except a bit of embarrassment in the beginning. Miri latches, feeds and winds all normally. I’ve never had any trouble.” Harry didn’t mention the problems with her first feed, it was not something he liked to discuss. As far as he knew, only he, Severus and Solarin knew of his initial issues.

“When was she born?”

“May 5th.”

Remus chuckled and Sam looked sheepish. “Sorry, my curiosity got the better of me,” Sam said, taking a bite of red pepper to occupy his mouth.

“It’s okay, I don’t mind. If you have questions, ask them,” Harry assured.

“It’s fine,” Remus concurred and Sam nodded. “It just amuses me how comfortable you are now. Ask your questions.”

“Was it a normal pregnancy?” Sam asked and it was Severus who answered him.

“Perfectly normal. There were a few issues in the beginning, when Harry was first liberated, but it became easier as he regained himself. We did have a slight scare just after we moved in here, but it turned out to be Braxton Hicks,” Severus said.

“If it’s not too personal…I mean if it’s alright…well…”

“Spit it out,” Sirius said.

“I was wondering about the birth,” Sam said and Ron blushed a spectacular shade of red. “I’ll understand if it’s not a topic to discuss.”

“It’s fine, though I’m sure we could cook things on Ron’s face now,” Harry joked, earning an embarrassed smile from his friend.

“I’m sorry, but the thought of you actually…you know…it’s not right in my head,” Ron defended, Hermione stroking his hair. “It was hard enough for me to deal with your monthlies. I think too hard about you…doing that…having Miri…well, my head might explode. So I’m just going to eat my lunch and ignore the conversation.”

They all laughed and he determinedly fixed his eyes on his plate, nibbling at a corn on the cob.

“Alright, we’ll just ignore you looking like a tomato then,” Harry agreed. “Miri’s birth…I’m going to need help for this one, I wasn’t exactly in a position to make solid memories at the time.”

“We’ll help,” Remus agreed, Sirius and Severus nodding as Harry detached Miri and sat her on his knee to wind.

“Right, what do you want to know?”

“How long was the labour?”

“He laboured for twenty nine hours,” Severus replied, feeding Harry a carrot stick. “The contractions began at quarter to one in the morning and Harry paced to ease his discomfort. His waters broke after twelve and a half hours, which prompted his labouring in the bathtub. He began to push at ten pm. Miri was delivered at four fourty four, the morning of May 5th, on our bedroom floor.”

“I’ll tell you this for nothing, that was not a fun way to spend a night,” Harry put in. “I delivered on all fours. Severus dealt with the business end, I won’t let anyone but Severus touch me there. Sirius, I held onto and Remus rubbed my back.”

Sam looked impressed as he gazed at Harry’s hips. “You’re telling me you had a vaginal delivery?” he asked as Harry latched Miri to his other breast.

“Yup.”

“But your hips are so narrow. That shouldn’t be physically possible,” Sam argued.

“Possible or not, I did it. I couldn’t have a caesarean, I’m too compact inside, it was too high a risk to choose to have one instead of do it naturally. If I had been in real trouble, or if I simply could not get her out, Severus would have had to do one, no matter the risk. But I managed it, and he didn’t have to intervene.”

Everyone smiled at Sam’s amazement, and Severus noticed how eagerly Hermione was listening to the conversation.

“Hermione, are there any questions you want to ask?” Severus offered and she jumped, spilling her forkful of salad.

“No thank you. I’m content to just listen,” she said, using her wand to vanish the mess.

The discussion continued for a while but Sam had noticed just how thirsty the bushy haired witch was for any knowledge. It was not just him she had been fascinated by. In fact, there didn’t seem to be a subject she didn’t attack. Maybe he could give her something to help, to quench that thirst for the time being. He wasn’t sure what, but there must be something.

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Remus was aware of what the omega had noticed. Remus had spent months in the same house as Hermione, he knew exactly how voracious she was for information. It didn’t matter the subject, Hermione was excited by it all. The young witch spent most of her free time in the library, and she had already managed to read more than half of the vast collection. He and Hermione got along swimmingly, they always had. He knew just how to satisfy her appetite.

“Sam,” Remus interrupted after they had finished the majority of the picnic and everyone was sitting around chatting, just enjoying each others company in the sweltering heat of the august afternoon. Sam had been deep in conversation with Charlie on the scales of a Welsh Green dragon, but stopped immediately at the sound of his name. Charlie actually looked quite happy to be relieved of the attention; he instantly got up and made his way over to Phoenix, dropping a light kiss on the top of her head and letting her pull him into her game of Exploding Snap with Ginny.

“Yes, Remus,” Sam said cheerfully, snagging a strawberry from a plate near his feet.

“I was wondering what kind of examination you wanted to do on me.”

“Well, I wanted to do two of them. One from the waist up, and an internal. I’ll be checking your general health with the first one, and the internal is necessary. I have to check your cervix, make sure that all is going to plan. Just let me know when you’re ready and we can go and do them,” Sam said, slipping away from his boyish omega persona and back into the role of seasoned healer.

“Would it be possible to do the waist up exam out here?”

“Out here? You mean, with the pack watching?”

“Yes. I think it might be a good idea for Harry and Nixie to see what goes on and it might be nice for Hermione to see, though it would be best if we left the blood test until you do the internal, I don’t think my cubs would enjoy watching that bit,” Remus explained. “Hermione is considering a career in healing, it might help her decide if you let her help. Though, make it seem like your idea when you suggest it. She’ll go weak at the knees. Poor girl needs something to make her giggle, she’s been awfully blue since her parents were killed. Be a lamb and flirt with her a little, indulge her in this.”

Sam grinned at him. “Remus, you old softie,” he teased. “If you’re comfortable with it, I have no objections.”

Sirius, who had been listening to the whole exchange, smiled at his husband and kissed him swiftly before he attracted everyone’s attentions.

“Sam’s going to examine me,” Remus said. “I need two examinations, one from the waist up and an internal one. I was wondering if anyone had any objections to him doing the waist up exam out here, where you can all watch if you choose.”

Hermione was practically floating in her excitement and Remus shared a sly smile with Sirius.

“No one has any objections, Remus,” Severus said, he and Harry lying on their fronts facing him, teasing Miri with her stuffed mermaids. Harry had not put his top back on and Solarin had taken to decorating his back with her pens, trying to make some kind of brightly coloured picture from his scars. So far, it looked like a paint machine had exploded over Harry’s skin. She was not straddling his backside as she had done with Charlie, Harry was too sore for her to do that, so she was kneeling by his ribs.

“Well, there is a slight request I want to make to the lovely Miss Hermione,” Sam said flirtatiously. He winked at Ron to show him he was fooling around and continued on. “I was wondering if she would like to help.”

“Me?” she squeaked.

“Yes. Remus tells me that you’ve shown an interest in my line of work. I think it might help you decide if you had a practical experience of what treating someone like me and Remus involves. And I know you’re bright enough to take in anything I show you. Would you like to help?”

Ron busied himself by taking Joseph inside to change his nappy in order to hide his smile. His wife had been so withdrawn, so sad since she had the twins. She adored them, but it was not the same for her without her parents. She needed something, and he decided that he would be forever grateful to Healer Jones for putting that spark back into her beautiful brown eyes.

Hermione nodded and Sam beckoned her over. All eyes were on them and he considered that this must be what celebrities got every time they went out of the door. No wonder Harry had hidden away.

“Right, the first thing you need to know is that I do not treat patients in the same way other healers do,” Sam began, the brown gaze intense in her attempt to not miss a single thing. “Most other healers treat patients using only magical methods.”

“Why are you different?” she asked.

“I was trained as both a muggle doctor and a magical healer,” he revealed and she practically lit up. “My Muggleborn father, who is the other Healer Jones, decided I should have a full education when I showed an interest in the field, so he arranged for me to have the resources to do both. I trained for twelve years, seven for muggle medicine and five for magical. My father helped me learn to merge the two.”

“I didn’t know that could be done.”

“It’s rare. As far as I know, me and my father are the only two healers in Britain who can do both successfully.”

“Why did you decide to do that?” Phoenix asked. “You live in the Wizarding World, so why would you need muggle methods?”

“For a lot of the people Sam treats, having diagnostic spells cast upon them is not a good idea,” Severus supplied. “For many of them, the spells can make them feel worse, or be interfered with by their magic.”

“Like Solarin? She’s a powerful magical being, would her magic interfere?” 

“Yes, like me,” Solarin said, adding a flourish to one of the dragons she had fashioned from a burn scar on Harry’s shoulder blade. “My magic makes test results go a bit off, so it’s better if I’m seen to in the muggle way.”

Harry sniggered. “Those pens tickle.”

“You look like some weird mosaic,” Anne said, peering over to them.

Severus craned his head and gazed at his sisters handiwork. “Accurate assessment. Very pretty though.”

“Does Remus being pregnant mean you have to treat him the muggle way?” Harry asked.

“It is a factor, but I treat all my werewolf patients that way. The patient often reacts badly to the spells, it makes them feel very ill, so I draw a blood sample to perform the spells on,” Sam said, opening his bag. “I won’t be drawing blood out here, that will wait until later. But there are many other things that need to be done, which is where you come in Hermione.”

Sam talked Hermione through taking Remus’ blood pressure, pulse, temperature, listening to his heart and lungs and then proclaimed that for the rest she had to watch, that it was something that he had to do. 

Remus smiled encouragingly at his children and Hermione as he sat through the whole long process. He hadn’t really appreciated how quick and painless Sam made his check ups until Hermione was allowed to do everything. His smile became genuine as Sam told her to watch, that he would take over. Thank Merlin for small mercies. Sam announced he was going to look at his ribs and spine and his smile became forced once more. He hated this part.

“For a werewolf, the first indicators that the infection is getting out of hand and requires treatment to control it are the ribs and the spine,” Sam instructed, Hermione watching him avidly. “Fenrir Greyback is an example of an infection that has gotten out of hand.”

“Have you seen him lately?” Anne asked curiously. “I heard they called in a healer to look at him when he was first sent to Azkaban.”

“It was me they called. They figured I might have more luck treating him and getting out alive. I got out alive, it’s the only good thing about that meeting. He’s still a rabid dog.”

“Horrible man.”

“I don’t think he can be considered a man,” Sirius said angrily, Remus stroking his hair to soothe him. “He’s a monster, nothing but a monster.”

“Calm down, Siri,” Remus advised. “He’s locked away now, it’s all for the best.”

Sirius sighed and nodded. Remus leaned in and kissed his cheek, making him smile.

“What do you mean about the infection getting out of control? I’ve never read about that happening,” Hermione said and Harry chuckled at her.

“I’ll lend you my books on it, Hermione, the ones Remus gave me when I was adopted,” Harry assured and she smiled at him.

“What I mean is, the infection is very aggressive, which is why there is no cure. The simplest way to approach it is to think of it like muggle HIV and AIDS,” Sam instructed, working on Hermione’s status as a Muggleborn. “It’s not as bad as those, but it’s the best comparison I can give you. A werewolf infection will not kill the sufferer, but it can become out of control of the immune system, and start creating problems. In Greyback, his infection has become extremely uncontrolled. We call cases like his over-infection. Some time ago, it spread to his brain, driving him mad. It’s the last stage of the infection, he is beyond treatment now. He’s more wolf than human, which is what makes him so dangerous.”

“He’s feral,” Phoenix put in. “He keeps biting people and attacking innocents because the infection has turned him into a feral wolf, even in his human form.”

“Exactly, Nixie,” Sam praised. “Ten points to the beautiful blonde.”

“So, why are the ribs and the spine the first indicators?” Ron asked, drawing attention away from Phoenix, who had gone bright red again.

“I’ll start with the ribs. In a lycanthrope who’s infection levels are normal the ribs feel like any normal persons. They’re rounded to the touch and they’re under the skin with no chance of being viewed unless the skin is split open. If the infection has become uncontrolled, the ribs feel very different. They develop a sharp ridge and appear through the skin, literally cutting through to lie outside the body in places,” Sam described, Ron going a little green.

“That’s why you check Remus’ ribs?” Charlie enquired.

“Yes. I’ve been infected for twenty eight years, come November. It’s wise to keep an eye on it,” Remus said. “Why don’t you check them before moving onto my spine?”

Sam nodded and knelt behind his alpha. He began in his armpit, swiftly feeling his way along every protrusion, feeling for any unusual ridges or bumps. When he reached the final one, he made his way to the other side, feeling his way. He hadn’t even needed to touch Greyback to know he was over-infected, he had seen the bloodstained bones as clear as anything. He hadn’t even needed to go into the cell with him, he had seen how bad he was through the bars. But Greyback had smelt him, known he was there. He never did have a good tongue in his head.

“It hurts?” Harry asked worriedly as Remus hissed.

“It’s a bit uncomfortable because he’s so thin,” Anne supplied. “It doesn’t hurt him, I swear. It just doesn’t feel very nice.”

Remus smiled at his cubs, reassuring them, as Sam removed his hands. “Absolutely fine, Remus. Not a single deformity in the whole bunch,” Sam assured. 

“Good to hear,” said Sirius, holding Remus’ hand. 

“I’ll explain about an over-infected spine before I check yours, Remus,” Sam said, taking a sip of water. Remus nodded and Sam began to explain it to them, though Harry and Phoenix were looking rather relaxed. Maybe this had all been in their books. “So, the spine of an over-infected werewolf is the same as the ribs, it appears on the outside of the body. When checking Remus’ spine, I look for any bumps that might have developed. Another thing I look for is that his tailbone has not begun to extend.”

“Extend?” Hermione asked.

“In an over-infection, the last bone of the spine begins to grow like a tail,” Harry supplied.

“Very good, ten points to the elfin beauty,” Sam said cheerfully. “Alright, Remus, curl forwards for me as best you can.”

Remus folded his arms on his crossed legs and rested his head on them, grimacing as fingers began to move swiftly down his back. One hand slipped into the waistband of his boxers and pressed at his tailbone and he screamed. He tried not to, but he couldn’t help it. He hated that one more than anything else, even an internal. It bloody hurt, no matter what his mother said.

“Sirius,” Remus whimpered and was rewarded by Sirius holding him, the hand disappearing, Sam proclaiming that it was all normal, there was no extension.

“I know, honey, I know. All over now,” Sirius soothed as Remus curled into his arms, breathing deep.

“That one can hurt, it’s normal for it to hurt,” Anne reassured the two worried looking cubs and Sam nodded with a sad smile.

“Don’t worry, he’ll be fine in a moment. I can’t offer an explanation as to why it hurts so much, but it’s just a part of it,” Sam said, rubbing at his own tailbone. His father had checked him over the day before. That was not pleasant, he felt Remus’ pain.

“I’m alright, pups,” Remus assured as he sat up once more. “I think that’s enough poking and prodding for now.”

“I do still need to look at your abdomen,” Sam said gently.

“Later,” Remus barked and Sam nodded immediately, going pale. Remus sighed and stroked his hair, comforting him. He hadn’t meant to snap. “Sorry, Sam. I didn’t mean to say it like that.”

Honey eyes of the omega looked up into the amber ones of his alpha and suddenly it didn’t matter. He knew where it came from, and he’d been yelled at by his patients before. 

Treating Remus had never been easy, not when the man was his alpha. Even though Remus was nine years younger than Sam, Remus had always been the one in charge, and Sam had always been fully aware that if Remus didn’t want him to do something, there was no way in hell he was going to be able to. Sam could only treat Remus when he allowed it, and he was thankful that Remus was a kind alpha. He knew of many other alphas who were not so pleasant.

“After dinner?” Sam offered.

“After dinner,” Remus agreed.

Further discussion of the rest of the examination was cut off as Miri shocked them all.

“Dada,” she said, waving her fist at Severus.

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“Did she just…?” 

“Miri is…”

“She couldn’t have…”

“Her development…”

“Is it possible?”

“It is possible, she just…”

“She’s too young to…”

“She’s not too…”

Bill stood in the open doorway watching them all debate over something or other. There was a strange man with Remus, must be Sam the healer.

[I’m home. What did I miss?] he pushed into Solarin’s head, making her jump slightly.

[Welcome back. Miri just spoke,] she said.

[She speaks all the time.]

[I’m not talking about her babbles. I’m talking about her first word,] she corrected and she let him have his shocked silence as she exchanged memories of their days with him.

[Definitely a daddy’s girl. Is that possible? Isn’t she too young for that?]

[No, that’s what I’m trying to tell them, if they’ll ever listen. Augurs are way ahead of the milestones. Miri has been hearing our voices and our minds since before birth. She began reading Harry when he was six months pregnant with her, according to Mad-Eye,] she explained, still trying to get someone’s attention so she could tell Harry this and calm him down. [She’s been hearing words and thoughts for six months. She’s months ahead in her intellectual development.]

“I’m home!” Bill yelled, making them all jump. “You know, maybe you should listen to the other augur right now.”

“I’ve been trying, but they worried me by asking all those questions about it,” Harry said, cradling Miri protectively.

They all fell quiet and Solarin sighed, walking over to Harry and stroking Miri’s cheek as she knelt in front of them.

“Daddy. Miri do it,” she instructed and the tiny girl stared at her for a moment, trying to figure out if this was another game.

“Dada,” Miri said again, waving at Severus. Her tiny voice was timid, unsure.

They all stared open-mouthed and Harry stroked Miri’s curls. “So, she is actually saying daddy? She’s not just babbling?” he asked and Solarin smiled.

“That is what I was trying to tell you. Consider what Mad-Eye told us about Miri. She’s been reading you since you were six months pregnant. She’s way ahead of her expected intellectual development because of her abilities,” she explained.

“Clever girl,” Sirius said.

Harry peered at his daughter. The baby book was useless now, it would be more use as kindling. She was way ahead of everything in it, how would he know what to look at when he needed guidance? He would have to rely on everyone else in the house even more for his parenting questions and problems. She stared up at him with eyes that matched his own and suddenly, it didn’t matter that he would have more trouble taking care of her. She was his, his little girl. 

And she had just said her first word. 

She looked worried; her lower lip was trembling, her eyes were tear filled. Harry considered their reactions to it. She probably thought she had done something wrong. He held her close and kissed her curls, grabbing her stuffed snitch.

“Go on, sweetheart,” Harry urged with a smile. “Go on, call him.”

“Dada.”

His smile grew and he handed her the snitch. She giggled and waved it at him. 

“Dada! Dada! Dada!”

“Here, Severus. You heard her, she wants her daddy,” Harry said, passing her to him. She squealed as he took her, cuddling her close and telling her what a clever girl she was.

“Do you think she knows any others?” Remus asked excitedly. He was hoping that maybe she knew his name. He wasn’t allowed to hold her while he was pregnant, her magic was too uncontrolled for it to be safe. 

“Maybe,” Solarin said. “She’s been reading her carrier for…”

She was interrupted by a tiny voice. “Caya,” Miri said, waving her snitch at Harry.

“Good girl,” Severus praised and Harry kissed her tiny hand, making her coo in pleasure. She looked thoroughly impressed with herself. Harry couldn’t stop smiling even if he tried, which he didn’t. His baby, his beautiful girl had just called him. She knew exactly who he was, she could call for him now. He didn’t even care that she was months ahead of other babies. In his opinion, the worst that could happen is that she ended up a brain box like Hermione, and that was pretty good in his view.

“Miri, where’s Sirius?” Harry asked and she peered around before she waved her snitch filled hand at the Animagus, proclaiming “Sis.” She managed to identify two more of them, the ones who held her most often, and they gathered various manglings of their names as she tried to get her tongue around them. Solarin was Sin and Remus became Rus, though she was a little befuddled by Sam and called him Rus as well. Solarin explained that Miri could pick up that they were both werewolves. Before today she had only ever met Remus, so Sam confused her slightly.

“Why does she only know the five of you? Why not us?” Phoenix asked, looking a little put out that her niece slash sister didn’t know who she was. Solarin grinned.

“Miri got bored during her birth, didn’t she, Harry?” she asked the Seeker holding his daughter in the air, nuzzling her little round belly, making her giggle and pat his head.

“Yup,” Harry confirmed as Severus plucked Miri from his hands, holding her close and stroking her nose with a feather Hedwig had dropped on the grass earlier.

“She read the ones in the room with her. Harry, Severus, Sirius and Remus. She probably knows Poppy too. Hours of being bored, she amused herself. She knows their minds better than others, and she knows mine because she hitchhikes on my abilities occasionally. She’s a very advanced little witch,” Solarin explained, and then Miri showed them just how advanced she really was.

Charlie blinked as his guitar landed in his lap. “How the hell…who did that?”

“I think…I think Miri did it,” Harry said, his voice filled with awe. “Did my three month old baby just do that?” he asked Solarin, staring at the guitar.

“Yes, she did,” Severus confirmed. They all looked at Miri, to find that she had caused a nosebleed by summoning the instrument. 

Sam looked panicked by it, and Remus and Sirius grabbed a shoulder each to keep him from rushing over. Harry and Severus were her parents, they would handle this. Severus and Harry were learning how to handle Miri and her abilities. It would become more difficult as she got older, it wasn’t easy having a child who could summon a cookie when you told her she couldn’t have one, so it was best if she was taught discipline now, when her abilities were new to her. Severus cleaned the blood with his wand and Harry cuddled her close, scolding her.

“Not again,” Harry muttered. “No, Miri, too much. Don’t do that, it’s too much,” he said firmly. “Too big, Miri. Stay small.” She made her hand glow red and waved it at him and he smiled. “Good girl. That’s it, stay small, sweetheart.” She snuggled sleepily against him and he sighed. “She’s worn herself out again. I’m going to go and put her in her crib.”

Bill smiled at Harry as he passed and focussed his blue gaze on Solarin as she persuaded Charlie to play the guitar, singing along with him.

Merlin, she looked beautiful, too beautiful for him. Mind, he always thought that, he spent his days in permanent shock that she had chosen him. She could have any man on the planet, any one at all, yet she had chosen him. He wasn’t rich, he wasn’t famous, he didn’t consider himself as handsome as she proclaimed him to be. He was not the smartest, or the funniest. He often found himself wondering just what it was that made her love him, what made him worthy of her.

[You adore me,] came her gentle voice. [I’m the most precious thing in the world to you. You have a wonderful heart and soul. And I think you are the most gorgeous man in the world.]

He hadn’t realized he was projecting to her. She was still singing along to Charlie’s guitar, yet her statements were clear and steady. It always amazed him when she did that.

[Flattery will get you everywhere with me,] he joked, choosing to remain in the doorway, watching. 

[It’s not flattery. It’s the truth,] Solarin argued, shooting him a look of honesty. [Come join us, Sam’s wondering who you are.]

[That’s your healer, right?] he asked as he pushed off of the doorframe, pulling off his heavy work robes as he went. 

[Yup.] Her light infectious mental giggle as Sirius told Sam who he was. [He’s shocked that you’re my Bill. He didn’t expect you to look quite so rock star like, didn’t expect you to dress like me. I think he was expecting a straight laced pompous twit like Percy.]

He looked down to find he was wearing a black leather shirt with black leather trousers and did look rather ‘rock star like’. Though, it was probably the long hair and the earring that did it. [Silly man,] he assessed as he stole a kiss between song lines, sat down on the blanket and uttered a verbal greeting to Sam. [Arin?]

[Yes?] she replied as she helped him peel off the leather shirt that was sticking to him, trailing ice down his back, making him sigh in relief.

[Will you…are you the one who did the drawings on Charlie and Harry?] He didn’t know what had made him change his mind, ask something else. She knew he had changed his mind at the last minute, he knew that. But she would only say no to his original question, there was no point in asking it again in any seriousness.

[Yes, that was me. They look like explosions in a greetings card factory, not quite what I was aiming for, but I’m no Michelangelo. Do you like them?]

[Very pretty.]

She was pausing, he could tell. Whatever she was about to say, he knew he would have to keep a lid on his emotions. Whatever it was, she wanted it to be private, he could feel that through the connection.

[I love you, Bill, don’t you love me too?]

He sniggered, he couldn’t help it. It caused Severus to lean in and explain the connection to Sam. The healer had never seen it in action, he had only heard about it.

[I love you, Arin. All my heart and soul.]

[So ask.]

[Ask what?]

[The question that’s buzzing around your head like a mosquito,] she mentally sniggered. [You can’t hide anything from me…] He marvelled at the way her face gave nothing away when they had these silent conversations. He had never perfected that.

[Alright, you little minx…will you marry me?] he asked, grinning, as he pulled off his dragon hide boots. It hadn’t been this hot when he had gotten dressed. 

It was a standing joke between them. He had been asking for years, and she had always said no. It was their habit for him to ask every once in a while. She always gave him some excuse. She was too tired, too young, too old, too hungry, too thirsty, too horny, too bored, or something just as ridiculous as a reason for why she couldn’t marry him. She was funny about marriage, and he accepted that. He wouldn’t push it. He had her, that was enough. He didn’t need a ring or a piece of paper to prove that. He wondered what her reason would be this time, so he was absolutely shocked speechless when she did answer.

[Yes.]

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Severus retrieved Miri’s teething ring from the freezer and handed it to her, the tiny girl gnawing on it desperately as he sat down with her and let his mind wander.

It had been a quiet month, all things considered. 

Phoenix’s birthday had been a huge success, the party had rivalled Harry’s own. She had received just as many gifts as Harry had, and she had been the ultimate birthday girl all day. Charlie’s birthday had followed a few days later, and he had opted for a quiet family dinner to celebrate.

Remus was now in his 16th week of pregnancy and his morning sickness was worse than ever. It disabled him for a full hour every morning before he could even attempt to take the potion for it and his nausea continued throughout the day, despite the potions. He found crackers helped. His other symptoms had gotten worse as well, such as his tender abdomen. He screamed every time Sam examined him, and the good healer had ended up with a fair few bruises. 

Sam continued to visit every Monday and Friday, sometimes bringing his father with him. It was a wise idea to have two healers on hand, just to be safe. It was also necessary as Sam could not attend Remus during his sedated monthly change due to his own furry little problem. Jack Jones had proven to be as big a hit with the pack as his son had. Harry and Phoenix had taken to calling him Grandpa, something which made him grin like a madman every single time they did it. 

The two Jones men had a shared bedroom in the house, neither were there overnight together often enough to warrant having one each, and Sam still lived at home anyway. He claimed that there was no point in finding his own place, he didn‘t spend enough time in his own bed anyway. Sam often arrived at Number Twelve in the evening and lost track of the time, enjoying himself too much with his pack, thus he ended up staying the night and flooing home in the morning to change his clothes, until he started keeping a supply of clothes at Number Twelve. Jack stayed the full three days that Remus was sedated, and evenings that involved him losing track of the time like his son. Their room held two single beds and they seemed to enjoy spending the time together. Sam said it reminded him of the camping trips his father had taken him on when he was young, which made Jack smile softly and launch into a long tale of one such trip where Sam got poison ivy.

Charlie had stepped into Remus’ line of work by writing books on dragons. It seemed to be becoming quite the family tradition. Remus and Solarin were the two who had started it, but now they were joined by Severus, Charlie and Sirius. Sirius’ was going to make a very interesting read. No one had any recollection of there ever being a book written on the knowledge of imprisonment in Azkaban from first hand experience.

Lucius, unfortunately, had not been quiet. He had attempted to break into Gringotts, heading for the Potter vault. No one could fathom what he had been after, but Harry suspected that he had been looking for Miri’s birth certificate, which was framed and mounted on his bedroom wall. He reasoned that there was no actual testimony that Miri existed apart from her birth certificate, no confirmation that she was actually a girl, so Lucius may have been looking for verification of what he had read in the letter he had found in Hermione’s parents house. Lucius hadn’t managed to get to the vault, though he got scarily close, but he had managed to escape being caught. 

He had also stepped up his harassment of the family. Harry was not the only one receiving anonymous post from him now. All of them were receiving untraceable letters at least once a week, and Charlie had taken it upon himself to open any post that was delivered, regardless of who it was addressed to. At least half of the mail every single day was immediately sent to Moody to aid with the search.

The most devastating event of the last month had been Lucius’ latest three murders. Jean-Claude, the owner of Enchantment, his bouncer Joe and Maab the singer had all been found butchered in Enchantment the morning after the anniversary. Solarin had cried for days over that one, not even Bill had been able to soothe her. Moody had surmised that Lucius had gone back to the last place he had seen Harry, hoping for some kind of sign as to where he was now, and found nothing. He had killed them in a fit of temper.

Severus watched as Harry said his goodbyes to a tearful Ron and Hermione, Arthur telling the two that they had to hurry or they would miss the train.

It was the 1st of September, and Harry and Phoenix would be remaining in Grimmauld Place, home schooled for their seventh year. Harry wasn’t able to handle the large numbers of people attending school brought, and Phoenix was too fragile to go back. She was still regressing into childhood, it was not a good idea to expose her to all Draco’s former friends and former fiancée. Dumbledore would be gathering lessons from their professors and sending them to Severus, who would be coordinating with Sirius and Remus to teach the two. It had been hard to reassure Harry that his friends would not forget him, but it was made easier when Dumbledore had confirmed that Harry could indeed still play on the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Harry had smiled about that one for days.

Harry had been doing well, he hadn’t had a single panic attack since the anniversary. His first period had passed with much the same screaming and writhing that the first night had brought. By the third and final day, it had no longer panicked people when he suddenly screamed in agony, the pain potion wearing off.

Harry was currently on day two of this months bleed and he was doing very well. No blood curdling screams this time, only whimpers. It was much better.

Phoenix was also doing better, she wasn‘t worrying them all so much with her behaviour. She was still very childish for days on end, and the house’s inhabitants had become used to it. Sam and Jack had surmised that it was probably a reaction to having been denied a childhood the first time, that she was making up for what she had lost, and they had all relaxed with it, reassured that she wasn’t going crazy and that this was just a phase she was going through, it would pass in time. They actually quite enjoyed indulging her childish side, especially Sirius. He delighted in the simple things, such as tucking her in at night and her curling up in his lap as he gave in to her pleadings to read her a story. Remus was the one she turned to when she got hurt. Tripping over her own feet, falling out of bed, paper cuts, all of it was dealt with by Remus. She insisted that her papa be the one to make it better, even if it was Sirius who performed the healing charm.

Severus’ attention was drawn out of his reverie as Snuffles slinked into the kitchen and curled up at his feet, his head on his paws.

“Mood swing?” Severus asked.

Snuffles yipped and he reached down to give the Animagus a reassuring pat to the head. It had become common occurrence for Remus to snap over the slightest thing. Funnily enough, he only reserved it for Sirius. This was the third time this week that Sirius had hidden as Snuffles in order to better protect himself from more outbursts from the pregnant werewolf. No one, not even a hormonal pregnant man, would kick a puppy. And the fact that Snuffles always chose Severus to hide with helped keep Remus under control, slightly.

“I’ll see you soon,” Harry promised Ron and Hermione as he eased Catherine out of Ron’s arms. “Remember, the first Gryffindor game is in November. We’ll be playing together again.”

He handed Catherine to Charlie and moved to Hermione, who was clutching Joseph. Ginny was rubbing Ron’s shoulder as he nodded, taking a deep breath to pull himself together.

“Don’t worry so much. We’ll take good care of them, and you’ll see them soon. You’re only half board now, you’ll be here every weekend,” Harry reassured as he slowly took him from her, handing him to Anne. “Now, you better get going. A whole summer with our library, the Hogwarts one will be jealous if you don’t pay it a visit soon.”

Hermione sniffed, let out a shaky laugh and hugged him. “You promise you’ll take good care of them?” she sobbed into his shoulder.

He patted her back. “I promise. We’ll take as much care of them as we do Miri. They’ll be safe with us, I swear.”

She nodded and Ron slowly led her to the door, the two of them and Ginny casting a further farewell to the room, before Arthur ushered them out, proclaiming that he and Molly would be back soon. Charlie and Anne slipped the sleepy twins into their bouncing cradles and placed them in the middle of the table, surrounded by heavy books and under Severus’ watchful gaze so they didn’t bounce their way off.

Harry sniggered as he made his way to the table. “They are so never letting go of the twins when they visit them,” he proclaimed, picking up his own baby from his husband and stroking her curls. He glanced down. “Has Remus been mean to you again, Snuffles?”

Snuffles gave a pitiful whine and Harry smiled at him, Miri squealing as she caught sight of the great big moving stuffed toy. 

“Sis! Sis!” she cried and Harry sniggered. Sirius couldn’t fool her, she knew that Snuffles was not a real dog. Apparently it was an augur trait as Snuffles had not managed to fool Solarin either.

Harry sat down with her and Snuffles crawled out of his hiding place, placing his front paws on Harry’s knees and letting Miri pat his nose. She giggled and grabbed one of his floppy ears, yanking it. Harry chuckled and pried her fingers off of the ear as Snuffles shut his eyes against it, but the Animagus remained silent. She always managed to get that ear, he was used to it.

“Miri, be nice. No pulling,” Severus instructed, and then sighed as Snuffles curled around his feet once more, hiding his vulnerable underbelly against the stone floor and covering his snout with his paws.

“Stop hiding, Sirius,” Remus said softly as he was escorted to his seat by Phoenix. “I’m sorry, all right? I didn’t mean to say that, and I never meant to yell at you. I’m sorry, sweetheart.”

Snuffles cautiously made his way over to the penitent werewolf and laid his head on his knees, his tail wagging as he was scratched behind the ears. He crawled out into an open space and changed back into Sirius.

“You were really malicious this time,” he said to his shame faced husband. “Maybe Sam can give you something to make you less unpredictable.”

“I’m sorry, Sirius. I didn’t mean it,” Remus said, sniffling. Sirius sighed and made his way over, pulling his chair close and cuddling Remus as he cried. This, too, was rather frequent to watch and everyone pretended not to notice.

Harry strapped Miri into her highchair and reclined the seat a little so she would not do herself any harm. She could hold her own head up, but she could not yet sit unaided. Her intellectual development was the only thing she was highly advanced in. Her physical development was at the right stage for her age. Her emotional development was a little above average, but that was just part of being an augur. The highchair was a blessing. She could sit in it and be supported in the right way but still look around and talk to those around her. Well, it was more babbles with the occasional real word, but she still enjoyed it. And it left everyone with both hands free while they ate.

“Caya,” she said as Harry stepped away. She held out her teething ring to him and he took it, finding it had gone warm. He rinsed it and stuck it in the freezer, retrieving a frozen water filled one that would stay cold longer.

“What do you say?” he asked as he held it out to her.

“Ta,” she replied obediently and he kissed her cheek, letting her have it. She immediately stuck it in her mouth and began gumming it. In fact, the only thing she didn’t chomp on was Harry. She was very good during her meals, she did not use him as a chew toy. 

Harry considered the teething rings to be a godsend. When she had begun to teethe a few days ago, her screams of agony had terrified him, sparking old insecurities in him when he couldn’t figure out what was wrong, but Molly and Anne soon figured out the problem. The freezer now held twelve teething rings, all of them in constant rotation as she found more relief from cold objects. She was quite good about it really, all things considered. At least she could actually call for one of them and show them what she wanted.

Harry retrieved some vanilla fudge and placed it on the table in front of Remus as he stopped crying.

“Bloody hormones,” Remus mumbled before he smiled up at his cub. “Thank you, pup.”

“You’re welcome. And don’t worry about the moods, it’s normal,” he advised, reclaiming his seat and accepting an orange juice from Severus.

“I can’t believe my pup is giving me pregnancy tips,” Remus said, utter disbelief written across his face. “It should be the other way around.”

“Believe it. Look on the bright side, you get all these free hints and tips. Speaking of which, I found evening primrose helped with the mood swings. That is the one I took, isn’t it, Severus?” Harry asked his husband, reaching for a piece of fudge and earning a growl from Remus. Harry snatched his hand away, entwining his fingers with Severus’.

“Do not growl at Harry. It is his fudge, you will share it with him,” Sirius said firmly. Remus looked sheepish and pushed the bag closer to Harry.

“Yes, evening primrose. It is a muggle homeopathic remedy. You took one capsule every morning with your potions. It helped keep the more extreme ones at bay. It did not stop them completely, but it did help. Would you like one of us to get you some, Remus?” Severus asked.

“Please. Anything that will help at this point will put me forever in your debt,” Sirius answered for him, and Remus smiled guiltily around his mouthful of fudge, Sirius absentmindedly reaching out to stroke his greying hair. “When are Solarin and Bill due back?”

“Sometime this morning,” Severus replied. “She called me when they arrived yesterday afternoon. I haven’t been called about one maiming the other or either being arrested, so I assume they are having a good time.”

“Tell me again, where have they gone and why?” Remus asked. “I missed that bit when they told us. Flipping morning sickness. Why is it called morning sickness if it happens all day?”

“Pass,” Harry said thickly through a mouthful of candy, grimacing at the memory of it.

“Don’t talk with your mouth full,” Severus instructed automatically and Harry sniggered, blushing slightly as he swallowed the sweet before muttering his apologies. “They have gone to Paris for the night. Their ten year anniversary was back in May, but they have not had the chance to commemorate the event before now. Bill has whisked her away to a very upscale hotel for the night. I expect them back any minute.” 

As he said it, Bill appeared through the floo, followed by Solarin. Bill was carrying a bag and both of them were sporting big grins that didn’t seem to be going anywhere anytime soon.

“Hello. Did you have a good time?” Anne asked, looking up from the vegetables she was chopping for lunch, Phoenix helping by passing them to her. She was far too clumsy still to be allowed to handle a sharp knife.

“Brilliant,” Solarin said. She shared a look with Bill before she crossed to Severus. “Can I talk to you in private for a moment? It’s nothing bad, it’s just something you should know before everyone else.”

To say that Severus was immediately on his guard was an understatement. Whenever she said something like that to him in her Hogwarts years, he usually ended up in Dumbledore’s office, trying to soothe one of the other professors. It was not a statement that induced happiness in him. He followed her out of the room and up to the second living room, which was bare. No one saw the point of having a second living room, thus it was undergoing renovations so it could be converted into a playroom for Miri and the twins. So far, all that had been done was the base coat of white on the walls. 

Solarin closed the door and faced her anxious brother, folding her hands behind her back and rocking on her heels. “Me and Bill kind of…well…we did something,” she began.

Severus groaned. He really hated it when she said that. “What now? What have you done? Pranked the Minister?”

“No.”

“Terrorised a muggle?”

“No.”

“Any pranks at all?”

“Not a single one.”

“You’re going to make me guess aren’t you?” he sighed and she nodded. He folded his arms and looked her up and down. “A new tattoo?” She shook her head. “A piercing in a compromising place?” 

She laughed at him. “No, no piercings or tattoos, though we did consider matching hearts on our arms. But we restrained ourselves so no, no new body art.”

He ran through a list in his head, reeling each of them off for her, and at each one she shook her head. What the hell had they done?

“Are you pregnant? Did you forget the Charm?” he asked suspiciously, running out of ideas.

“Definitely not,” she said.

“I give up, I am out of guesses. The only one left is so absurd I’m not even going to voice it,” he said wearily. And then his eyes widened at her shy grin. “Did you…?”

“Yes, we did,” she said timidly, holding out her left hand. He took it and ran his thumb over the gold wedding band on her ring finger. 

“You married him? You got married?” His voice was full of disbelief. This was the girl who had proclaimed ferverently for most of her life that she would never get married, that she would not imprison herself, she would not shackle herself to a man.

“I got married,” she mumbled. “I’m sorry we didn’t call you, but the thing is…well, me and Bill, it’s always been just that, me and him. So our wedding was the same. I’m sorry, Sevus.”

He looked up into her tear filled eyes. She thought she had hurt him by not having him there, by not having the big wedding. 

“Sweetheart, that doesn’t matter to me,” he said, pulling her into a hug. “I don’t care that you eloped. If it was what you wanted for your wedding, then so be it. I got to have what I wanted for mine, well, what Harry and I wanted. It is only right that you got what you wanted for yours. I am not angry, just in a state of shock. I thought you never wanted to marry.”

She pulled back and smiled softly. “I know. But you told me once that if I ever decided to get married, that if I ever chose to spend the rest of my life with someone, it should be someone I love unconditionally, that I would die for. You told me that he should be the one who appreciated me, who loved me for who and what I am.” She laughed. “It took me ten years to see that he was with me all along,” she said.

He smiled and pulled back fully to look at her ring once more. It was a Claddagh ring, white gold. It looked dazzling against her pale skin. Above it was a moonstone engagement ring, this one was white gold too. Moonstone…that had been her favourite gem when she was about fourteen.

“How long has he been asking you?” he asked.

“Nine years.”

“He must have been ecstatic when you said yes,” he said, smirking when she blushed. 

“I said yes the day of Harry’s regression,” she mumbled. “While me and Charlie were singing together.”

Severus snorted. “No wonder he looked so happy.” He pushed her hair off of her face and cupped her chin. “You’re happy with him, happier than I’ve ever known you to be. You’re looking for my blessing when you should know that I gave it when I accepted that the two of you are together,” he said and she lit up, her sunshine smile inducing his own megawatt grin.

“How do you always know the right thing to say?” she asked as he led her to the door and down the stairs.

“Because I know you.”

They entered the kitchen and Severus tried not to laugh at Bill’s nervousness as he approached them. 

“I’m sorry, Severus, but it…” He cut off the younger wizard with a wave of his hand.

“You do not need to explain. I understand why it was this way. Welcome to the Snape family. Good luck,” he said with a smile and he grinned once more as the curse breaker heaved a sigh of relief. He hugged the younger man briefly, whispering into his ear, “If you hurt her, I will kill you.”

“If I hurt her, I’ll help you,” Bill whispered back.

They pulled apart and Severus smiled as he examined Bill’s ring. It was a Claddagh, the same as Solarin’s, and it looked extremely pale on the freckled finger. “You should introduce them all to your wife,” Severus said and sniggered at the silly grins they both wore.

Bill turned to the rest of the room. “Everyone,” he said and they all looked at him. “It’s probably best to do this before mum and dad come home.”

He got no further as they heard the crack of Apperation in the hallway, followed by Molly and Arthur entering.

“You may want to sit down,” Severus advised before they said a single word and they did as he instructed.

Bill looked uncomfortable, probably expecting the shrieks of delight from his mother. She had been on at Bill to marry Solarin ever since she had discovered their relationship. She would be over the moon and deafen them all in the process. He went to open his mouth but then Sam and Jack flooed in, and Solarin chuckled, rubbing his back as he growled. “I’ll do it,” she said.

She motioned the two healers to seats and cleared her throat. “We got married,” she said simply, holding up her wedding ring. The whole room fell so silent, she feared she had gone deaf suddenly.

“Mum, dad, say hello to my wife, Mrs. Solarin Eileen Weasley-Snape,” Bill said as the silence stretched on. No one seemed to be able to say anything, except Miri.

“Sin Bi,” she babbled, waving her teething ring at the two. Bi was the only way she could say Bill, and the curse breaker chuckled. 

“Miri’s happy for us,” he muttered.

“Like father, like daughter,” Severus replied and it seemed to be some sort of trigger for the explosion of sound that was the happy cries from the family. Miri, Catherine and Joseph jumped and Harry moved to his daughter as she began to whimper. Anne and Sirius picked up a bawling twin each and the three of them tried to soothe the startled children while offering their own congratulations to the couple. Though, all three of them had to pause in their congratulations to remind Remus to stay in his seat.

All others were drowned out by Molly’s yelling. She rushed forwards, pulling her son into a bone crushing hug, and then inflicting the same treatment on Solarin, who choked slightly.

“Mum, you’re crushing her,” Charlie said as he hugged his brother, clapping him on the back. 

Bill couldn’t hear him, and the only reaction he had to his wife being crushed by his mother was to firmly pull Solarin out of Molly’s grasp and into his own. His eyes were fixed on his father, still sitting at the table. Bill couldn’t work out what the emotion on his face was. Was it anger? Regret? Disappointment?

“Dad?” Bill said uncertainly. The people around them went silent, all eyes on the Weasley patriarch.

[He’s numb. Give him a minute to process it,] Solarin pushed into his head and he gripped her hand a little tighter.

Arthur looked up at his son and then let his gaze fall on Solarin’s form. He seemed to be measuring her up and Bill felt her discomfort flood him. He thought his father liked her, adored her even. 

“I thought marriage made you nervous?” he asked her, his eyes searching. “This is what you wanted isn’t it, it’s not something you pushed yourself into? You didn’t do this because Molly kept on, because you felt pressured, did you, Sol?”

She smiled and walked up to him, letting him hug her to reassure himself. “I did this because I love him. I did this because I finally realized, after ten years, that the one who sees me as being worth more than all the gold in Gringotts was right there with me all the time,” she said firmly, and Arthur smiled.

“Then I say…it’s about bloody time!” Arthur said, pushing himself into the group of celebrating witches and wizards. 

Severus wasted no time at all in calling Dumbledore and Moody, who arrived with identical expressions of shock. The whole family had a celebratory lunch, which was the only kind of celebration that Bill and Solarin would allow them, and chatted about the details of the wedding, which Bill and Solarin were incredibly closed mouthed about.

Harry leaned in close to his husband. “This means that me and Ron really are related now, doesn’t it?” he asked in a low voice, Sam and Remus pretending not to be able to hear him.

“Yes…” Severus replied uncertainly. “His brother is married to your sister-in-law. I believe he would be considered your…brother-in-law. I think.”

“Good. You know, I think I did pretty well by choosing him as my friend.”

Severus grinned and pulled him in for a kiss. “Extremely well.”

Harry grinned, but his smile faded as Bill and Solarin were ushered from the room by Sam and Jack.

The two healers looked grave, and Harry wondered if this was the next test for them.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Sirius groaned as he was shaken awake, Remus gently calling his name.

“I’m awake, I’m awake,” he said scratchily as he sat up, cracking open his eyelids, which felt like lead. He glanced at the clock to find it was quarter to five in the morning. Oh well, almost time to get up.

“I’m sorry, Siri, but I’m being good, I’m following The Rules,” Remus said quickly, sitting up beside him.

Sirius sniggered. It had been a week since Bill and Solarin shocked them all by eloping, and the evening primrose was a godsend. It stabilised Remus so well, Sirius hadn’t had to hide as Snuffles for the whole seven days. And Remus was religious about following The Rules since he began taking it. The wonders of a single tiny pill every morning.

“It’s okay. What do you need?” Sirius asked, leaning in for a chaste kiss. Though, even that gave him an erection. Bloody no sex rule. At least in Azkaban he hadn’t been able to even see Remus, let alone touch him. That abstinence had been easier than this torture. He was getting tired of screwing his hand in secret rendezvous in the bathroom, all in the effort to stop him jumping his husband, The Flipping Annoying Rules be damned.

“Some water and crackers. My throat feels like the Sahara and my stomach’s preparing to revolt again.”

“All right, honey, I’ll get them in a minute, just let me get rid of it first,” Sirius said and Remus moaned in frustration.

“That’s a waste of a good hard-on. We could put it to such good use.”

Sirius chuckled darkly. “Don’t I know it. Okay, I’m good now. I’ll be right back,” he said, climbing out of bed and putting on a t-shirt. They used to sleep completely nude, until Phoenix took to climbing into bed with them when she had a bad dream. Now they both wore pyjama bottoms at the very least. Sleepwear did actually help a little with the abstinence. That and the chance of being caught by their daughter, who would most definitely tell on them.

“Thank you, angel.”

Sirius slipped from the room and smiled. Remus had taken to calling him that since he realized that Sirius never complained about waiting on him 24/7. Every time Remus had him get something for him, he called him ‘angel’. Sirius found he quite enjoyed it.

He tiredly made his way down to the kitchen, feeling at fault about the pregnancy and the happiness it brought. He and Remus already had two beautiful children and they were expecting their third. He felt greedy, and guilty, so very very guilty.

Solarin and Bill could not have children.

Sam and Jack had delivered the news to the newlyweds the day after they got married, and Bill had explained it all to them while Solarin hid herself in the bathroom. Sirius would never forget the devastation on the redheads face as he broke the news. 

Solarin’s body, because of the pressure of her considerable magic, would not accept the conception of a child. Their chances of having a baby, even with medical intervention, were one in a million, and Sam had said that was a hopeful estimate. Solarin had not said a single word to anyone all week, and her eyes were permanently bloodshot from crying. She would not stay in the same room as Molly, or Arthur, too ashamed and disappointed in herself that she would not give her new in-laws grandchildren, no matter how they had tried to reason with her that it didn’t matter.

Bill seemed to be taking it better than his wife. His exact words escaped Sirius at that moment, five in the morning did nothing to improve the memory. Bill had said something along the lines of “I have her, that’s all that matters to me”. It had thoroughly impressed Severus. Bill was the only one she would speak to, and it was limited to mindspeak that made him weep.

Bill had reassured Remus and Sirius that he and Solarin were happy for them still, that they wished them all the luck in the world for their success with the pregnancy. But Remus had taken to keeping his mouth closed around the younger couple, no matter how rough he felt or how much he needed someone to get him something. And Sirius was waiting for some sign as to how to proceed with the young augur without her blowing up his head.

Anne was pottering around, putting on coffee and tea. The witch never slept much, and was always the first one awake. Sitting at the table, reading Sirius’ notes for his book, was Solarin.

“Good morning, Sirius,” Anne said cheerfully.

“Good morning, Anne. I wonder, could you take Remus some crackers and some water? I need some coffee to actually function at this godforsaken hour,” Sirius said with a pointed nod at the augur. 

Sirius really loved his mother-in-law. She grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, the pack of crackers and a glass from the cupboards and swept from the room without a single word. Sirius fixed himself the much needed coffee and sat down at the table, wondering what to say. It occurred to him that he had never been alone with Solarin. Maybe he should go get Severus, or Bill. Merlin, even floo calling Moody or Dumbledore might be easier than this.

“Is this all true?”

He looked up from his contemplation of his coffee as she spoke. She was holding out a piece of his parchment to him. He took it and scanned it, realizing it was his description of how it felt to be around Dementors all day every day for twelve years solid.

“Yes, it’s all true,” he said.

She leant back and curled up her legs, resting her shins against the edge of the table. She tugged at her hair and stared at the paper in his hands.

“Have you ever visited Azkaban?” he asked, trying to make conversation.

“No. I wanted to once, when I was young, but Severus wouldn’t let me.” She sighed and looked up at him, her black eyes boring into him. “How’s Remus doing? What week is he in now?”

“Seventeen. He’s doing a bit better now he’s on the evening primrose tablets.”

She nodded and smiled at him. “It’s okay, you know. I’m still okay with you and Remus having this baby. Stop feeling so guilty about it.”

He spluttered for a moment. “I…umm…we…”

“Stop. I’m happy for the two of you, really. It’s fine. Besides, you have enough trouble with your own reproduction, forget about mine,” she said, standing up and grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge.

“We still feel bad.”

“I know you do, it’s coursing off both of you in waves. I understand why you feel that way.” She sighed and sat down next to him, forcing him to look at her. “Stop feeling guilty. You did your punishment. This is mine.”

He nodded and then froze. Wait. What the hell? He was so confused. What the hell was she talking about?

“I don’t understand. What are you talking about? What punishment?” he asked and she looked away, picking at the label of her water bottle. “Sol, what the hell could you be punished for? Why would anyone punish you?”

“Why not?” she whispered. “My dad punished me, because I wasn’t like Serena. At school, the other kids punished me because I was different. The Ministry punished me, because of what I am. Makes sense that the universe would punish me now, now that I deserve it.”

“Deserve it? What makes you think you deserve to be punished?” he asked.

He couldn’t believe it, it was all true. Severus had told them all that Solarin had always hated her gift because of Serena, because of Tobias. But Sirius had never seen evidence of it before, so he hadn’t believed it. Silent tears were trickling down her cheeks, but she made no move to wipe them away. So he did it for her, forcing her to look at him this time.

“What could you possibly have done to deserve this?” he asked as he wiped away her tears with the pads of his thumbs.

“I killed people,” she said, confusion etched across her face. “Don’t you get it? It wasn’t just that one little girl. There were men, women, children. Pureblood, half-blood, Muggleborn. Muggles, wizards. I can’t even tell you how many, anymore. Nine, twelve, a hundred and four! I don’t know, because I can’t remember. Sirius, I killed children. Not just children Harry’s age, children Miri’s age. I killed children. I deserve to be punished for that, can’t you see that?”

“Sol, listen to me. Those were accidents. They were all accidents. None of them were your fault, it was those bastards at the Ministry, who are in Azkaban now. They’re the ones who need punishing, not you,” he argued.

“No, you’re wrong. I’m the one letting down my husband, and my mother-in-law, and my brother, and…”

“You are not letting any of us down!” he half yelled.

She stared at him. He supposed not too many people spoke to her like that.

“Solarin, you are the most wonderful woman I have ever met. You gave me my family. You’re the one who had had enough guts to come here and tell me that I couldn’t see Harry. Merlin, I don’t think anyone else could have managed that, not even Remus. And Nixie. If it wasn’t for you, she’d still be trapped as Draco and she wouldn’t be well enough to be as happy as she is. If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have my children,” he said firmly. “Don’t you get it? You’re the glue that stuck us all together. And you will get your miracle, just like me and Remus got our miracles. Yours will come when it’s the right time for you. When it’s your turn, your miracle will happen.”

She sniffed and, after a moment, she nodded. He folded her into a hug, stroking her hair and murmuring reassurances to her. 

“It was you,” she whispered and he pulled back in confusion. 

“What was me?”

“You were the reason I wanted to visit Azkaban when I was younger.” She smiled, pushing back her long hair and moving to the kitchen counter. It seemed she needed something to do with her hands, as she began chopping fruit for breakfast. “I read Lily the last time I saw her. She thought about four men. You, Remus, James and Peter. After she died, I wanted to meet you.”

“I didn’t know that,” he said, moving to her side and chopping up apple.

“No, you wouldn’t. Severus kept putting me off. He used to tell me that you’d all gone travelling, that you’d needed to get away after Lily died. He managed to keep that lie going until my first year of Hogwarts. I never peeked into his head to see if it was true, I just accepted that it was.”

“Then what happened?”

“I was in the library, flicking through all the old Prophets. It was some project or other for a class, I can’t remember which one. Anyway, I pulled out one with you on the cover. I asked Bill about you. He told me what had happened,” she said, peeling a kiwi.

Sirius managed to slice his hand open, and she grabbed it, shoving it under the cold faucet. She ordered him to leave it there while she grabbed her wand from the table. 

“You and Nix, matched clumsy pair. Where was I? Oh, right, so I stormed into Severus’ office, stamped my little foot and demanded that he take me to meet you,” she said as she spread the thick healing gel she had poured from the tip of her wand. “He spilt a whole mug of boiling hot tea down himself.”

Sirius laughed at the image his mind conjured up and she smiled at him. 

“Well, once Poppy had finished dealing with all the scalding, he called Albus. The two of them tried all kinds of things to dissuade me. You weren’t allowed visitors, you weren’t very nice, you were a murderer. I argued with every single one. Albus could get me in to see you, you couldn’t possibly be worse than dad, you had killed to avenge Lily. Eventually, they had to tell me what Dementors would do to me,” she said as she fastened the bandage around his hand and returned to the kiwi.

“What would they do?” Sirius asked as he carefully picked up his bloody knife and dumped it into the sink. He grabbed another one, and had to put it down as she answered.

“Driven me mad. I would have blown up the whole prison and everyone in it, including myself.”

They were silent for a while, each thinking about their own issues, their own pasts, and then she spoke again.

“Do you remember being sent Christmas cards in Azkaban?”

He smiled. He still had them somewhere, he had forwarded all of them to Grimmauld Place. They had all been waiting on the mat for him when he returned all those years later.

“I remember. Highlight of my year, those were. Why? Do you know who sent them?” he asked as he carried bowls to the table.

“Yeah, I do. It was me.”

He whirled around and stared at her. “You?”

“Yup. I thought you’d be lonely all by yourself, and I got to have a Christmas, you should too. So I sent you a card every year for my whole time at Hogwarts.”

She smiled and swept from the room, leaving him standing there, stunned. She had sent them? He raced upstairs to his room, startling Remus and Anne. He muttered an apology and began tearing the room apart, frantically rummaging through drawers.

“What are you looking for?” Remus asked from the bed, not daring to get up.

“Do you remember that pile of Christmas cards that was sitting on the mat when we first moved in here?” Sirius said as he sat on the bed, tearing through his bedside cabinet though he managed to keep the contents hidden from Anne.

“Yes.”

“Where did I put them?”

“Here,” Remus said, pulling them out of his bedside cabinet. “You put them in mine because yours was…in use.” Anne smiled and slipped from the room, giving them some privacy. Remus sighed in relief. “We put the lube and toys in yours. Why do you want them? It’s not Christmas.”

Sirius pulled the seven cards out of the envelope he kept them in and opened one with a tree on the front.

“TO MR SIRIUS BLACK

MERRY CHRISTMAS

FROM SOLLY PRINCE”

“I’m such an idiot,” Sirius muttered, showing it to Remus. “Why the fuck did that name not ring a bell when Bill first mentioned it? Living in the same house with Sol for months and it never clicked.”

“Sol sent you these?”

“Yes. She thought I’d be lonely in Azkaban, and I deserved a Christmas too. She sent one every year she was in Hogwarts. Have you ever seen her sweet side?”

“No. Didn’t know she had one,” Remus admitted. “She must have, if these are anything to go by.”

Sirius didn’t hear anything else. He sat there and opened all seven cards, laying them all out on the bed. The handmade Christmas cards from some anonymous girl had helped keep him sane. He’d refused to think of Remus while he was in Azkaban, he wouldn’t let the Dementors take those memories from him. He didn’t think of Harry either, or James, or Lily. But these cards, they were different. The feeling they caused, it wasn’t quite happiness, so they couldn’t take it from him. 

It was hope. 

It was a tiny spark of hope deep down inside that there was at least one person on the outside who, even if she didn’t think him innocent, didn’t hate him. And just when he gave up that hope, Christmas would roll around again and another card would arrive. She had kept him alive. Finally, a while after they had stopped coming, he had all but given up, ready to beg for the Dementors Kiss. But then he had seen the Prophet with Scabbers on the front, and he had pulled himself back, pulled himself together, escaped and reclaimed his life.

Solarin had given him more than just his children. She had given him the energy to hold on, the spark that grew into actual strength that allowed him to escape. Her cards had sustained him long enough for him to get back to Remus, to clear his name, to put Peter behind bars. He smiled.

“Solarin gave us our life together. She’s the reason we got it all back.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

The family sat down to a quiet dinner the day after Remus’ second sedated change. The werewolf looked incredibly well rested, as opposed to Sam, who looked like he had been hit by the Knight Bus. 

Molly fixed them her chicken casserole, which went down extremely well. Jack spent the meal regaling them with tales of his more unusual patients, making them all laugh with the story of a vampire with toothache.

Solarin was enjoying her dinner immensely, when she suddenly got the taste of candyfloss. That couldn’t be right. Why could she taste that? It wasn’t in a chicken casserole. She looked up to find Fred and George strolling into the kitchen, lazy grins on their faces. 

“Why can I taste candyfloss?” she asked Bill.

“Candyfloss? Isn’t that what Tonks’ signature tastes like?” he replied.

“Yes, but she’s not here. Why can I taste it?”

Remus was sniggering, trying to hold in his grin and motioning to the twins. Solarin peered at them, trying to figure it out. And then it hit her. 

“Oh my God, did you two…? Have you two…? Were you with…?” She couldn’t quite find the right way to ask, and everyone was looking at her weirdly. Well, almost everyone. Sam and Remus were nodding at her, grinning. They could smell it. 

The augur and the two werewolves fixed identical stares on the two identical males and they blushed. It only got worse when Tonks flooed in, expecting dinner.

“You did!” Solarin cried excitedly, laughing. “Merlin, you did!”

“Did what?” Harry asked, and it just made her laugh harder, Remus joining in. Sam’s eyes were fixed on Tonks, who was grinning at them all.

“What did they do?” Molly asked worriedly.

Most of the family had asked the same thing by the time Solarin stopped laughing.

“It’s not something I can say in front of polite company,” she said, the twins sighing with relief.

“You brought up my sexual history in polite company,” Severus reminded. “Tell us.”

“I slept with the twins,” Tonks said, accepting a plate from Jack. The kitchen went so silent, a pin drop would have sounded like a cannon blast. Even Miri was silent, busy being fed, though she was trying to giggle and nurse at the same time.

Fred and George were glowing like streetlamps, and they were staring at the metamorphmagus calmly eating her dinner. Bill had to be clapped on the back by Charlie as he accidentally swallowed a whole baby carrot in his shock. The Weasley’s were all frozen in their disbelief.

“What?” Sirius asked, after a healthy gulp from his glass of water.

“I’ve never been with a matched pair, so I spent the night with Fred and George,” the pink haired witch explained calmly, nibbling on a gravy soaked roll. “Solly can taste my magical signature on them, and theirs on me. Remus can smell it.”

“Will you-” Fred began.

“Shut up,” George finished.

“Our mother-”

“And father-”

“And brothers-”

“Are all here.”

“Boys, boys, boys, it’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” Charlie said teasingly. “If you two are into incest, that’s fine.”

Bill and Arthur had to restrain the twins as they both made a move to hit their chuckling brother.

“It wasn’t like that!” Fred yelled.

“It was just a bit of fun, an experiment! It was a favour for a friend!” George shouted.

Charlie raised his hands in defeat. “I stand corrected.”

“Prick,” Fred spat at him.

“Language,” Molly admonished as she returned to bottle feeding Joseph, Severus feeding Catherine. “There are little ears present who can repeat what you say.” She motioned at Miri, who was being winded and patting the table in amusement.

“No, Miri. No look, no see,” Severus instructed and she pouted at him, voicing her newest word.

“No.” 

“Miri, do as you are told,” Harry scolded firmly, glaring at a certain sheepish blonde. Damn Phoenix for teaching her how to say that one. Miri went still for a moment, before she held out her hands for her reward. “Good girl.” Severus passed her little stuffed snitch to her and she quietly allowed Harry to latch her for the rest of her meal.

“Why did you sleep with them?” Bill asked Tonks and she shrugged.

“You know me, Bill, I’m not the most conventional of women. I like trying new things. And, come on, who else could I have gone to and said I want to have a ménage à trois?” she said, Solarin dissolving into a fresh laughing fit.

“You know what? Sometimes, I really hate your abilities, Sol,” George grumbled, Fred nodding.

“Hey, now! It wasn’t just me. Remus and Sam could both smell her on you,” Solarin defended.

“How about we change the topic and someone introduces me and my son to the interesting pink haired witch?” Jack suggested, Fred and George collapsing into empty chairs. They were receiving a few glances from their parents and brothers that clearly said this would be discussed again later.

“Sorry, Jack. This is Nymphadora Tonks, who prefers to be known by her surname only. She went to school with Bill and Sol,” Remus said and Jack shook her hand. “Tonks, this is Healer Jack Jones, and his son, Healer Samuel Jones. They’re taking care of me during the pregnancy.”

“Nice to meet you, Healer Jones and Healer Jones,” she said, shaking Sam’s hand.

“P-please, call…call me Sam.”

Bill shared a suspicious look with his wife and Solarin took a huge bite of chicken to keep her mouth busy. Now was not the time to call Sam on his behaviour with her friend. She could get him later. The twins, they were fair game, they teased her all the time. But Sam was different, Solarin’s issue with him would be handled in private.

“Are you Andromeda and Ted’s girl?” Jack asked.

“I am,” Tonks replied. “Oh! I remember you now. The two of you used to come for dinner when I was little, right?”

“That’s right. What are you up to now?”

“I’m an Auror.”

The conversation stayed on that topic for most of the meal, and as Sam slipped out of the room to go to the bathroom, Solarin followed him. She leaned against the wall and waited for him to emerge.

He stepped confidently out of the tiled room and stopped as he spied Solarin waiting for him.

“You’re missing pudding,” he said and she smirked at him.

“Nice try,” she said, placing a hand on his chest and pushing him back into the bathroom. She locked the door behind them, upped a silencing spell and turned to face him. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh, don’t give me that! You know exactly what I’m talking about! You, flirting with Tonks, all meal long. Sam, she is not just a casual conquest you can try on for size. She is one of my best friends, and young enough to be your daughter, I won’t let you use her like you do all the others,” she warned.

“I don’t plan on doing that,” he said.

“Then what do you plan on doing?”

“Sol, what does her signature taste like to you?” he asked and she was utterly confused.

“What does that have to do…”

“Just humour me. What does hers taste like?”

“Fine, I’ll go with it. Tonks tastes like candyfloss.”

“And me?”

“Popcorn, toffee popcorn. But you know that, I told you years ago.” She paused as it clicked in her head. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?” He nodded and she deflated, leaning against the sink. “Oh, Sam. I really wish you didn’t feel like that.”

He sighed, leaning against the wall. “Me too. She’s not the type, is she?” he asked, but it was crystal clear that they both knew the answer already.

“No, she’s not. Sam, find another. Following this path will only bring you heartache,” she advised.

“I can’t. I wish I could but I can’t. You understand that, right?” he asked, his honey eyes pleading. 

She wished she had the power to change his mind, to change his heart. But, alas, she didn’t. In all her abilities, she had no way to save him from inevitable pain. And it damn near broke her heart.

“I understand, Sam, I really do. I just hope you get what you should from this, and you don’t end up getting broken by it,” she said and he nodded, offering her a sad smile as she slipped from the room.

He took a deep breath, and splashed his face with cold water. He had never expected to find this, it was simply not in his nature. He was not that lucky.

But he couldn’t help but hope.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Harry suppressed his grin as Remus struggled to explain the purpose of an Inferius to Phoenix. They had been struggling with the same topic all morning. It just didn’t seem to be getting through to the blonde. Harry had gotten it immediately, but he always grasped things in Defence Against the Dark Arts. Natural talent. Phoenix wasn’t so blessed with the subject, but she excelled in Potions. They were supposed to be finished with their lesson an hour ago, but Phoenix had caused it to drag out. Harry had tried helping Remus explain it without success. It just wasn’t getting through. Ah well, at least she was acting her age today, that was a plus.

Their lessons were very ordered now they had figured out how to make it work. Remus did all the theory work with them, helping them grasp the concepts before they were allowed to attempt the spells. Sirius did most of the practical work with them, using his skill in duelling to help them learn the spells they would need to have perfected to pass their N.E.W.T.’s. Severus taught them Potions on Thursday mornings, and went through anything the other two had missed on a Friday afternoon. Monday nights were spent with Sirius the insomniac in the garden, studying Astronomy. Wednesday mornings were when Molly would cover Herbology with them, she had excelled in it at school. On a Saturday morning, the home schooled students and their teachers sat down with several others. Hermione and Ron were there every Saturday, visiting their children and helping the tutors ensure they were on track with the two home schooled teens.

Arriving with the young Weasley’s were usually Professors Dumbledore, McGonagall, Sprout, Slughorn and Flitwick. These five teachers assessed how the two teens were getting on and any kind of difficulties, which were quickly ironed out. It had only taken the first week of seventh year to get the routine in order.

The routine allowed Phoenix to have her childish moments, and Harry to care for Miri, and both of them to have their bad moments without big disruptions to their educations. It also allowed Ron and Hermione to have the whole of Saturday and Sunday with their children. The whole family found the routine to be perfect, if a little unorthodox. It suited the pack like a dream.

Remus groaned and rubbed his tired eyes. “I forfeit. I give up. Maybe Severus will be able to help you, my sweet little star, but it is beyond me,” he said with a smile. “I think that’s about it for today. The two of you are free of my clutches, but would one of you escort me to the loo before you disappear on me?”

Phoenix popped up from her cross-legged seat on the carpet and took Remus’ hand, leading him from the room. Remus called something to Harry, but he didn’t hear him.

There was blood on Remus’ chair.

He made his way to the bathroom and knocked. “Remus, are you feeling okay?” Harry called through the wood, drawing Phoenix in to whisper to her what he had seen. She nodded and sped down the stairs, intent on getting help.

There was an agonised gasp from beyond the door and Harry chewed his lower lip. 

“I’m fine, pup. Why don’t you go and find Miri? I’m sure she’s wanting her lunch by now,” Remus called, but Harry wasn’t fooled and he wasn’t going anywhere, not until Sirius told him to. 

Sirius appeared at the top of the stairs, flanked by Sam, Jack, Severus, Arthur, Bill and Charlie. The Animagus beckoned him over and Harry led them to the living room, showing them what he had found.

“Okay, Harry, it’s okay. We’ll take care of Remus. Go downstairs to the kitchen and stay there. Miri is in her highchair,” Sirius instructed and Harry cast one more glance at the bathroom door before he nodded.

Sirius tried to control his racing heart as his godson did as he was told, determinedly walking downstairs to the kitchen.

Sirius turned to the other men. “He’s going to fight us,” he whispered.

“How do you know?” Charlie asked.

“I’ve seen it before. He had appendicitis, it took four people to pin him down so Poppy could get anywhere near him,” he answered and tuned out as Sam explained.

When Remus was in pain, or scared, or angry, his wolf took over. He would become…feral. The emotions or experiences had to be extreme to cause Remus to become that bad, but it was a natural werewolf instinct to protect themselves. Remus would no longer recognise them as his pack, they were all a threat now. Well, Sirius had never seen that bit. He had seen Remus when he was pinned down, though, and it was not nice to watch.

He had been summoned to the hospital wing by Dumbledore. It had been three weeks after Remus and Sirius had first slept together, solidifying Sirius as Remus’ mate, their sixth year at Hogwarts. They needed him to force submission in Remus, needed Sirius to force himself as the alpha. Remus would not allow Madame Pomfrey to treat him until he was submissive, until Sirius was alpha. Sirius remembered how Remus had reasserted himself as alpha before his stitches had even come out.

“Right, so everyone clear on all this?” Sam asked and Sirius nodded with the rest. 

He didn’t want to do this. Doing this meant the baby was gone. It meant he could lose Remus. Merlin, why had he let him go through with this? He couldn’t lose him, not now, not after all they had gone through to be together. And their children. Harry and Phoenix couldn’t lose Remus, they just couldn’t. Neither of them were strong enough to handle it.

Sirius made his way to the bathroom door and knocked. There was a slim chance that Remus would submit without being forced. They had to try it before they challenged him.

“Remus? Come on, open the door, honey,” Sirius called.

“Go away. I’m fine. Go away, Sirius.”

“Remus, we know you’re bleeding. You have to let us in.”

“Us?”

Damn it, he was playing with him, trying to buy himself more time, to talk them out of this. They didn’t have time for these games.

“Remus! Open the fucking door, or I swear to Merlin, I am breaking it down!” Sirius yelled and was met by an angry snarl.

He took a deep breath and had the other men stand back. He backed up a few steps and kicked the door, the wood splintering as it flew off the frame. Sam went first, pushing the door out of the way. Severus propped it up against the wall and Sirius was able to get a good look at his husband.

Remus had curled up in the space under the sink. His clothes were lying in a shredded heap around him, crimson from the blood pouring from a nude Remus. The lycanthrope was eying them all warily, growling at their presence. Sirius decided right there and then that he didn’t like a feral Remus. His husband had never gotten this feral before, even with the appendicitis.

Oh God, he was so pale. He was shaking through the blood loss, the pain, the fear. Sirius took a deep breath and controlled himself. If he went to Remus now, if he tried to comfort him, his lover would tear him to pieces. But it was hard to hang back when there were tears pouring down his sweet Remus’ face.

He hovered in the doorway as Sam growled at Remus, the omega challenging his alpha. It seemed to work, because Remus growled back, a warning. A challenge to the alpha, in wolf instinct, needed to be dealt with immediately, no matter the condition of either wolf. It was a good thing this bathroom was huge, because they were going to need the space when Remus went for Sam, which he would. Jack lingered near Sirius, holding a large black leather bag. Sirius didn’t want to know what was in it. If he did, he might not be able to go through with this. 

Sam growled again and Remus made a move to attack him. He didn’t do it, but it would only be one more growl before Sam would need all the help he could get. They needed Remus to come out. None of them, not even Sam, was strong enough to fight Remus alone. To pin him down, four of them had to grab him at the same time. If it was any less, the wolf would tear them all to pieces. There just wasn’t the space for four men to grab Remus from his hiding place. 

Sam growled and Remus lunged for him. Bill and Charlie grabbed an arm each, Arthur and Severus a leg each and together they pinned him to the floor. The blood oozed across the white tile. Remus snarled and fought against them, the four men having to put their whole weight against the straining limbs. Remus was even trying to bite them, he was that far gone. The human was gone, the wolf ruled, and it would stay that way until Sirius forced it to change.

Sirius strode forwards and knelt beside his lovers arching ribs. “Remus, let Sam help you,” he said firmly.

He was met with Remus straining forwards to try and bite him. Remus never bit him, not even in the blazing fires of their passion. Human Remus never bit, period.

Sirius grabbed Remus by the hair with his right hand and placed his left on Remus’ chest. Simultaneously, he yanked Remus’ head back and forced his chest down, baring his throat which Sirius fastened his jaws around. As Remus continued to struggle, he increased the pressure of his teeth.

Though it was possible for Remus to bite him and break the skin, even if he had never done it, Sirius could not do the same. The werewolf’s skin was much tougher than it looked, his teeth could not pierce it. But he hated to do this all the same, he still worried about hurting him. It was pointless to worry about causing him pain, for Remus to become feral he was already in agony, but he still worried about hurting his sweet Remus.

After what seemed an infinity, Remus fell still. One moment of silence seemed to stretch out into eternity, before Remus whined and pushed his belly forwards in submission.

“Sirius,” he whimpered. “It hurts, Siri.”

A sick wolf turned to their alpha for help, and Remus was not the alpha anymore. He would not say it hurt if Sirius had not won the battle. Sirius removed his mouth from the pale neck, loosened his grip on the sandy brown hair shot with grey and eased his pressure on the trimly muscled chest. He captured those amber eyes with his own.

“I know, honey. I know it does. Sam is…” Remus growled at the mention of the challenging omega and Sirius yanked his hair again. “You will let him help you,” he ordered, snarling it out. 

Remus gasped, finding it hard to breathe. His eyes fixed on Sirius’ blue ones. His alpha. The alpha would help him, he always did, he would make it better. He whined and the grip on his hair eased.

“My baby…”

“Is gone,” Sirius said firmly, fighting the tears that threatened to suck him in, make him lose his control on the situation. “The baby is gone, Remus, it cannot be saved. Sam needs to save you now. Submit and let him treat you.” He watched as Remus considered it and then closed his eyes in defeat.

Sam moved forwards at Sirius’ nod and his father knelt on Remus’ free side, snapping open the bag. This was why he hated male pregnancies so much. Too many times they led to a situation like this, where he was fighting to save a perfectly healthy man because they had tried for something damn near unattainable. The male body simply was not designed to carry life. Remus was luckier than some though, this happening in his eighteenth week instead of later gave him a better chance of surviving this.

Sam had Arthur and Severus push Remus’ thighs against his torso, Remus screaming in pain. He snapped on a pair of gloves and forced two fingers into him. Remus was in too much danger for him to take his time, and he was too panicked to cooperate.

He hated the male cervix. It blended in so bloody well with the rectal wall. He frantically felt for it. He had to know how bad this really was. 

“Sam?” Jack asked as he eased an intravenous line into Remus’ arm.

“Give him oxygen,” Sam ordered, pushing down on Remus abdomen. “Found it.” He paused. “Fuck!”

“Pushing fluids,” Jack said as he secured the IV line in Remus’ arm, hanging the saline drip on the pole he resized, before he resized a tank of oxygen from his bag and placed the mask over Remus mouth and nose, securing the elastic. “What’s wrong?”

“Full dilation,” Sam said shakily. Oh God, he couldn’t lose his alpha, he just couldn’t, he refused to let it happen. He had finally found a pack, Remus had given him that, he refused to give it all up because Remus was stubborn. But this was bad, this was really really bad. Remus’ cervix was wide open, blood flowing like a river from it. This was why all doctors, no matter what world they were in, were told not to get too emotionally involved with their patients.

“Pressure, Sam. Don’t panic, apply pressure,” Jack ordered, seeing his son falter, seeing him pale. “Potion soaked packing, insert it and hold it there.”

Sam nodded and took the large rolled cotton swabs from his father. He shoved them into the shivering man and pressed them against the wound. Sam took a deep breath and forced himself to focus. “Okay, we need blood, potions are too slow. Get Anne, she’s the only one with his blood type.” Jack nodded and left the room, calling down the stairs. “Sirius, in the bag are twelve syringes in a sealed plastic box. Push them all into his drip,” Sam ordered.

Sirius shakily grabbed the specified box and opened it. “Which one first?”

“Doesn’t matter, just push them all. Insert the needle into the little branch on the clear plastic tubing and push down the end as fast as you can,” Sam instructed as he exchanged the blood-soaked packing for a clean one.

“Siri,” Remus gasped. “I can’t breathe.”

“It’s okay, just relax. We’ll take care of it all. Just relax, Remus,” the Animagus replied, grabbing the plastic tube and feeding potion after potion into it, forcing himself to focus on the tube and not his beloved Remus wheezing beneath him. He watched as Jack eased one end of a red tube into Remus’ arm. Red because it was filled with blood. The other end of it was attached to Anne, who was as pale as a sheet but stayed silent all the same, determined.

Sirius’ heart stopped as Remus began to convulse, the miscarriage to much for his body to handle.

“Bill, Charlie, get Sirius out of here! Now!” Sam yelled and the two redheads grabbed Sirius by the arms, pulling him from the room and towards the stairs.

“NO!” Sirius roared, fighting them, trying desperately to get back to Remus.

“Sirius, come on! You can’t be in there, not right now!” Bill yelled, but it only made him fight harder. He couldn’t leave him. No, Remus needed him, what was Sam doing, throwing him out? Remus needed him, he had to help, he had to do something.

Then there was a gentle hand on his face, stroking back his long hair, forcing him to look down into dark eyes.

“They are doing all they can for him,” Solarin said, stroking his hair. “There is nothing you can do for him now, Sirius. What he needs from you now is to step back, let them do their jobs. Come on, Sirius. Come and sit in the kitchen. Someone will come and get you when they can.”

Sirius crumbled, letting his panic take over, so much so that Solarin’s eyes watered. She blinked it away, her eyes resolute as they drilled into his.

“You won’t lose him,” she said firmly. “He’s strong, if anyone can make it through this, he can.”

Sirius cast one more worried look at the splintered doorframe before he nodded and let her take his hand, let her give him hope once more.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

The hours crawled by, each minute seeming to last days. Time lost all meaning as they waited.

Sirius was curled up in Remus’ chair, Phoenix in his lap, cuddled up. Charlie was rubbing Phoenix’s back as she cried, fear of losing Remus taking her over. It was actually helping Sirius, having to play daddy for the time being. It was excruciatingly difficult to stay positive for her, but he did it. Harry had taken to curling up between Solarin and Bill on the floor under the sink, Miri in his arms. 

Arthur had come down a while ago, bringing the news that Remus had stopped fitting but was still being worked on. He was currently pacing with Molly, trying to get her to sit down, the witch clutching both Joseph and Catherine. Anne had come down as well, with absolutely no news to give. She was standing behind Sirius, rubbing his shoulders.

“Hush, sweetheart, it’ll all be all right, you’ll see,” Sirius said, not even believing himself the way Phoenix needed to believe it. 

Albus arrived through the floo with Ron, Hermione and Ginny and the four joined them in their waiting, after Ron and Hermione had retrieved their children from Molly. 

Sirius wasn’t quite sure what he was waiting for. He was waiting for news, obviously, but what news? That Remus had died? That his body had given out? That he was fine? That Sirius had imagined the whole thing?

Solarin’s head snapped up from it’s resting place on Harry’s shoulder. “Sam’s coming down, Severus is with him,” she announced.

Sirius passed Phoenix to Charlie, the blonde wiping away her tears, and stood up, hovering anxiously by the door. Severus entered first. He crossed to Harry, passed Miri to Bill and picked up the petite being, carrying him to the table. He sat down and secured Harry in his hold, stroking the dark hair. Sirius saw it as a bad sign. Sam entered, his face grave.

“Sam, please…” Sirius begged and Sam sighed, taking a weary seat at the table.

“He’s alive,” Sam said and Sirius dropped to his knees, suddenly remembering how to take a full breath. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief, all hugging someone as they cried out their good fortune.

“Oh thank Merlin,” Sirius breathed and looked up at the exhausted healer. “Where is he? How is he? Can I see him?”

“Sirius, come sit down.”

The Animagus was helped to his feet by Arthur and he shakily sat down at the table. Sam had his head in his hands, breathing deep. Remus was alive, what could be wrong? Something was most definitely wrong, Sirius could just see it. 

“Maybe your children should leave the room,” Sam advised and Harry was the one who voiced protest.

“No. Me and my sister are not going anywhere, so you just go ahead and say what you have to say, Uncle Sam,” Harry said firmly, and Sam gave him a tired smile despite the seriousness of the situation. He loved it when one of them called him that. Phoenix nodded and Sam sighed.

“Fine, so be it. Sirius, I never lie to my patients or their loved ones, and I have no intention of starting now,” Sam began. “The good news is that Remus is alive, but that is the only good news.”

“What do you mean?” Anne asked.

“Remus has lost a hell of a lot of blood. He is barely hanging on. He is extremely lucky to have made it through the bleeding, by all rights that alone should have killed him. His heart stopped several times, his lungs gave out, we’ve had to hook him up to a machine to breathe for him. He was deprived of oxygen for a small while. We’ll be extortionately lucky if there is no brain damage. Sirius, to be quite honest, we all better start praying for a miracle. If he makes it to dawn, he’ll pull through this. But right now, his chances of surviving through until dawn are slim to none,” Sam said gravely. 

Sirius buried his head in his shaking hands and let his tears fall. No, now was not the time to let his children see him fall apart. He wiped them away and looked up at the omega. “I can’t lose him. Please, Sam, just do what you have to. Save him,” he begged.

“I’ve done all I can for now,” Sam said. “I removed the uterus and cervix and healed the wound. He’s had all the blood we can give him without killing Anne. We’re breathing for him, we’re monitoring his heart. There is no more we can do, Sirius. It is all down to Remus now.”

“Can I see him?” Sirius asked shakily.

“Only you. No one but his mate at this point. Even through unconsciousness he is still feral, it’s not safe for anyone else to see him right now,” Sam said and the rest of the pack nodded. 

Sam led Sirius from the room and up to Sirius and Remus’ bedroom. They paused outside the closed door.

“You need to be prepared for what you’re about to see,” the healer advised. “There are tubes and wires. He has a catheter for urine collection, it’s attached to a bag. There’s a tube in his throat, the drip, a heart monitor, a chest drain and several small cannulas so we don’t have to keep sticking him with needles. He’s very pale, and fragile looking. You need to be prepared for that.”

Sirius took a deep breath and ran his fingers through his hair. “I’m ready.”

Sam nodded and pushed open the door, motioning for Sirius to enter first. Sirius took a step forwards and suddenly he couldn’t breathe again. Oh God, he looked dead, he was so pale. There were so many tubes, so many wires. Sirius made his way over to the chair beside the bed and stared at his husband, hearing the steady beep of the heart monitor.

“Is he in pain?” he whispered and Jack shook his head. “Can I touch him?”

“Of course. If you talk to him, it might help him come around. He’s not sedated, just unconscious. The sooner he comes round, the better,” Sam said, drawing his father aside to discuss possible courses of action as Sirius nodded mutely. 

Sirius reached out and slowly eased his fingers under Remus’, stroking his wedding ring, rubbing his engagement ring. His hand was so cold. That wasn’t his Remus. His Remus always had warm hands, always. Sirius remembered in Hogwarts, when it had snowed in seventh year, Remus had warmed Sirius’ freezing hands with his own toasty ones, telling him he was a silly puppy for forgetting his gloves. Once his hands were warm, Remus had leaned in and kissed the tip of his nose. Sirius had proposed that afternoon. They had gone down to the kitchens with Peter and Lily and James for hot chocolate. Sirius had balanced the diamond embedded engagement ring on the thick whipped cream of Remus’ mug while James and Lily distracted him. Once he was able to form a complete word, Remus hadn’t hesitated in giving Sirius his whispered ‘yes’.

Sirius didn’t know how long he sat there, just staring at Remus. There was no smile on his face. His Remus always smiled. He remembered how Remus had smiled at him, that first time Sirius told him how he felt. They had been fifteen, and it had been raining. James and Peter had gone off to Hogsmeade, but Sirius had chosen to stay behind with Remus. They had been in their empty dorm room, Remus had been looking for a book and Sirius had just blurted it all out, how much in love with Remus he was. Remus had smiled at him and crossed the room in slow steps. He had kissed Sirius, right there and then, holding his hands. Sirius had felt him smiling as they kissed. Sirius had never let anyone else kiss him after that.

“Don’t leave me,” Sirius mumbled to his unconscious lover. “Please, Remus, don’t leave me. I can’t lose you, I worked too hard to be with you.”

Sirius reached out and stroked the wavy hair he had tugged on, rubbing his scalp. He remembered Remus’ face as he was taken away to Azkaban. Remus had been in the Ministry, though it hadn’t really been a trial, but Sirius liked to think of it that way. It was the closest he’d gotten to one, having Crouch reel off his crimes and sentence him to life imprisonment. It barely lasted two minutes, start to finish. Remus’ beautiful amber eyes had been fixed on him the whole time, betrayal swimming in those wonderful orbs. Remus had clutched at Albus as Sirius had been taken away, dragged away from him. The papers said Sirius laughed as he was taken away, but they were wrong, all wrong. It was a scream. It was Remus’ name. Sirius would never be able to forget that look, the last one Remus had given him before he lost sight of him, the last one for thirteen years. So much hurt, so much loss, all in one expression. It had haunted him in Azkaban, helping the Dementors.

Wait, that look, he’d seen it again. Sirius wracked his brain. When had he seen it? Where? That day, that Saturday morning in Sam’s office. Finding out about the baby. Oh God, he finally understood why Remus had risked it all for the unattainable. He finally knew what Remus had refused to tell him.

“I get it. Remus, I know, I understand,” Sirius breathed, Sam and Jack watching him intently. “Remus, I understand why you wanted this baby so much, I know now. You lost me, you were alone for all those years. You wanted a piece of me you could keep, just in case I was ever taken from you again. That’s it, isn’t it? Come on, honey, just squeeze my hand, just let me know if I’m right.”

And there it was, beyond any doubt, that small twitch of Remus’ fingers.

“Remus? Remus, honey, come on, do it again,” Sirius begged, standing over the bed, Sam and Jack rushing over to him.

There it was again, a little stronger this time.

“Remus, can you hear us?” Sam asked, looking into his eyes with a penlight. “Squeeze Sirius’ hand if you can hear us.”

Remus not only squeezed his hand, his other hand tried to reach weakly for the breathing tube. Jack switched off the machine breathing for Remus and time stopped for an agonising moment before Remus took a breath on his own. And then another.

“Remus, there’s a tube in your throat. We put it in, in order for us to breathe for you. I’m going to remove it, I need you to try and relax for me,” Sam ordered and Remus’ fingers moved again.

“He understands,” Sirius said and then watched as Remus’ head was tilted back, Jack holding it steady as the tube was pulled smoothly from his lovers throat. Remus coughed and gasped, drawing in weak shuddering breaths.

“Siri,” Remus rasped out and Sirius laughed, a short sharp gasp of pure gratitude to whatever deity happened to be smiling on them at that moment. 

“I’m here. I’m right here.” The fingers moved once more before Remus went limp, slipping into an exhausted sleep. Sirius collapsed into his chair, looking at the two smiling healers. “That’s good, right?” Sirius asked.

“Good? Good? That is bloody brilliant,” Sam said, falling into one of the chairs on the other side of the bed. Jack slipped from the room, and they heard him walking down the stairs, probably going to tell the others.

“He’s going to be fine now, right?”

“Sirius, you need to understand that this is just the first hurdle. Once he is sitting up and demanding a cup of tea, then we know he’s going to be fine. Until then, we could still lose him,” Sam said, drawing a blood sample from his unconscious alpha. Well, former alpha.

Sirius nodded and leant his head in his free hand, resting his elbow on the bed, still holding Remus’ hand. It was going to be a very long night.

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Solarin nursed her one shot glass of muggle brandy under the watchful gaze of Albus and Bill. The onslaught of emotions from her terrified family were too much for her to handle without help, and Moody always gave her a glass of muggle booze when she was drained. It helped.

Bill and Albus were the only ones still awake with her, everyone else had been persuaded to try and get some sleep. Even Jack and Sam had retired to their room, trying to get some rest while Remus was stable, and Sirius had fallen asleep in his chair.

She wiped away a tear, she couldn’t seem to stop them from falling. Sirius’ emotions had been the worst. Sheer unadulterated terror. It was horrific to pick up. Her barriers had been up, but she hadn’t been able to stop emotions that strong from getting through. Bill looked about as good as she felt, but he didn’t try and touch her. She couldn’t handle being touched, not right now. The emotions had been too big for Miri to register, and for that they were all thankful. They were not something a little girl should feel.

She took a sip as the owl swooped in through the open window. The heat wave hadn’t broken yet, but the heavy clouds threatened it. The beautiful brown bird placed the box it was carrying on the table, settling on top of it, and held out it’s leg for Solarin.

She took the letter and looked at it dubiously. The envelope held nothing but her first name. 

“Not another effing Lucius letter,” she muttered, ripping open the envelope and pulling out one of the two pieces of parchment. “Doesn’t he ever get tired of these games?”

“Apparently not,” Albus said, poking at the box. He himself had received a few of Lucius’ ‘presents’, and they were not pleasant.

“Pathetic little boy,” she snarled, but she softened when she read the letter. “Oh my God.”

“What?” Bill asked angrily, feeding the owl a few owl treats. “What the hell has he sent you now?”

“It’s not from Lucius,” she mumbled. “It’s from JJ.”

“JJ? That creepy little kid we were at Hogwarts with?”

“Yeah. JJ stands for Jean-Claude Junior. Jean-Claude was his father, JJ was the reason I got the job in Enchantment. He heard me singing one day by the lake and told his father about it,” she said, pulling out the second piece of parchment. “Jean-Claude mentioned me in his will.”

“What did he leave you?” Albus asked.

“Merlin…he’s left me Enchantment.”

The two men stared at her. “The club? He left you the whole club?” Bill asked incredulously.

“Yeah. It says in his will that I reminded him of his late wife. He’s trying to take care of me. This is dated five years ago. I was eighteen, it was just before I left.”

They were silent, each trying to take it in, and Solarin grabbed her glass, downing the last of her liquor in one gulp. It made her throat burn and she coughed, Bill taking the glass from her. They didn’t move, until the box did.

It rattled. Something inside it was moving.

Bill peeled the letter from the top and opened it, reading it aloud.

Solarin,

My father put in an order for this before he died. It was paid for when it arrived and there is no return address for me to send it back. It has no name, and I do not know where to send it to give it a good home. Maybe you will know of one.

JJ.

She reached out and pulled off the string securing the lid. She laughed as she removed the top. 

“What’s funny?” Harry asked as he walked in, carrying a grizzling Miri.

“Is the little one well?” said Albus, motioning to Miri.

“She’s fine, it’s her teeth again,” he said, retrieving a teething ring from the freezer. “What do you say?” he said as he offered it to her. Even at one in the morning he would still carry on with the advice Molly had given him. Discipline needed to be instilled now, before she got old enough to misbehave.

“Ta,” she replied and he let her have it, the tiny girl gumming it desperately. He slipped her into her highchair and poured himself a glass of water, sitting down at the table.

“So, what’s funny?” he enquired and Solarin lifted the purchase with no home out of the box. “Who sent you that?”

“It was Jean-Claude’s. He ordered it before he died. His son has no home for it, so he thought I might know of one. Typical Jean-Claude. He requested the runt of the litter. It’s why he took such a liking to me, because I was so much smaller than everyone else,” Solarin said, cuddling it.

“What are you going to do with it?” Bill said.

“I think I know a good home for it.”

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“No…please…please don’t…no….not him…please…”

Sirius awoke to the sound of begging. He blinked and looked over to his unconscious husband, to find that it was him that was pleading. He sat up from where he had slumped in his chair and noticed a head of blonde hair curled up against Remus’ side.

Phoenix had obviously crawled into their bed again, half asleep.

But it was Remus that caught Sirius’ attention. He was whimpering, pleading for something, and he was covered in sweat. His face was scrunched up in concentration and he was sobbing in his sleep. Sirius reached out and pressed his cool palm to Remus’ forehead, and then shook Phoenix roughly, waking her.

“Dad?” she croaked.

“Get Sam right now,” he ordered. She took one look at Remus before nodding and running from the room, almost slamming into the doorframe.

Oh God, Remus was shaking now, his body being tested once again.

“Damn it! God, Remus, come on, don’t do this to me! Please don’t do this, not now, not after you’ve worked so hard,” Sirius muttered as he pulled back the blankets from Remus, chucking them off the bed, leaving the trembling man in nothing but his boxers.

“What’s happening?” Sam asked as he sped into the room.

“He’s burning up.”

Sam felt Remus’ forehead and growled, grabbing the bag Jack brought in. He snapped it open and pulled out an in-ear thermometer, pushing it into Remus’ ear and waiting for the little beep. Remus’ heart monitor was going bezerk, making Sirius’ heart pound. 

“108,” Sam muttered as Jack took Remus’ blood pressure.

“Through the roof,” Jack said as Sam began drawing blood. Jack moved around the bed and checked the bag attached to Remus. “No urine production in two hours.”

“What’s happening?” came Phoenix’s voice from the doorway. She looked terrified.

“Nix, I need you to go down to the kitchen and tell Solarin that Remus has a fever, she’ll know what we need,” Sam instructed. “Go on, quick as you can.”

She sped away as Jack left the sickroom. “What is happening?” Sirius demanded as Sam ran spells on the vial of Remus’ blood.

“He has an infection, though I couldn’t tell you from what. Everything we used was sterile. His fever is sky high, we need to get it down,” the werewolf said, pulling out a stethoscope. Jack returned with a basin of cold water and a few washcloths. 

“Help me sponge him down,” he instructed, handing Sirius a cloth. He took it and began to press it against Remus’ face and neck, Jack concentrating on Remus’ wrists.

“It’s all we have,” came Solarin’s voice as she walked in with Phoenix, carrying a bucket of ice and frozen food. Phoenix began to frantically stuff ice cubes into plastic bags, handing them to Solarin who shoved them against Remus’ boiling skin. 

“Sol, on the count of three, I’m going to lift him, and you’re going to slap one of those against his spine,” Sam instructed and she nodded, grabbing another bag from Phoenix. “Okay, one, two, three.”

Remus was pulled up and she pushed the bag under him, the two of them lowering him to the mattress. Solarin sped from the room and Phoenix took over placing the bags. The augur returned a moment later with a dripping wet towel.

“What’re you doing?” Sirius asked as she draped it over Remus’ chest.

“When I was about seven, I got chicken pox and had a fever of 102. Severus had to put me in an ice bath. We can’t do that, we can’t move him with all these tubes and wires. This is close enough,” she said. “Do we have any feverfew?”

“Yes, in the garden, by the roses,” he said and she ran from the room, Severus entering as she exited.

“Harry came and woke me. Here, it’ll help fight the infection,” he said as he handed Sam a glass bottle of lavender potion. Sam lifted Remus slightly and poured it down his throat, taking his time so the man wouldn’t choke or spit it out. 

“Get him to drink this,” Solarin said as she re-entered, carrying a glass of green-tinted water. “It’s feverfew tea.”

Sam eased it down Remus’ throat as she placed hot water bottles filled with ice water against Remus’ shoulders.

“What will the tea do?” Phoenix asked, wrapping Remus’ ankles in bags of frozen peas as she had run out of ice.

“Help the fever to break,” the augur said as she pulled off the now warm towel and exchanged it for a cold one Severus handed her.

“Clever girl,” Jack praised.

“You have no idea,” Sam said, listening to Remus’ lungs again. “Lungs are clear, which is encouraging.”

“I learnt from the best,” Solarin said, glancing up at her proud brother.

“How the hell do you remember all this? You were seven when you had chicken pox, and you were delirious at the time,” Severus asked, hanging bunches of chives from the bedposts. 

“What are the chives for?” Phoenix queried.

“They promote healing, it’s very old magic, the only kind we can use around Remus,” Severus said. 

“Albus is thinking of it, so are you. Sometimes my abilities come in handy,” Solarin said. “This would be so much easier if we could just use healing spells on him.”

“It would be easier if we could move him to St Mungo’s too,” Jack said, hanging a fresh saline bag that had been resting in the ice bucket.

“Why can’t we?” Sirius said frantically. “If it could save him, why aren’t you doing it?”

Solarin glanced nervously at Sam, who motioned to Phoenix. Solarin pushed the blonde to the door. 

“Nix, sweetie, I received a gift tonight, Harry is downstairs taking care of it. How about you go and help him?” the dark haired woman suggested.

“But I want to help here!” the blonde argued, staring at the sick man on the bed.

“I know, but there is nothing else you can do. Let us take care of Remus now. Go and help Harry.”

Anne appeared in the doorway and cast a terrified glance at her son. “How is he?” she asked.

“We’re waiting for the fever to break. We’re doing all we can. Take Nix downstairs, please,” Jack requested and Anne cast one more longing stare at her only child before she nodded, taking Phoenix by the shoulders and guiding her to the stairs.

Solarin sighed and closed the door, turning to the frightened Animagus. “Sirius, his magic caused the miscarriage. He can’t be exposed to anymore of it, he might get worse. And we can’t take him to St Mungo’s because Umbridge is there,” she said calmly, taking a seat. 

They all settled in chairs, waiting for the fever to break. There was nothing more they could do, it was all down to Remus now. The werewolf was deliriously muttering, making them all frown in confusion.

“Please…don’t…no…not him…please…it can’t be true…you’re wrong…he wouldn’t…not him…”

“Oh God,” Solarin breathed, tears pouring down her face. She couldn’t block Remus out, his emotions were too strong and she’d been pushed to her limit by Sirius’ feelings. 

“What? Do you know what he’s talking about?” Severus asked.

She nodded, staring at Sirius. “He’s talking about you being found guilty, the day you were sent to Azkaban,” she mumbled and Sirius broke down, sobbing for all he was worth. She stood up and walked over to him, letting him grip at her before he turned back to the bed. 

Sirius took Remus’ burning hand in his own and stroked it. “I’m so sorry, Remus. I am so sorry,” he whispered. He took a deep breath and looked at Sam. “What the hell does Umbridge want?”

Sam sighed. “She wants to eunuchise Remus.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means she wants to render him incapable of mating,” Solarin said diplomatically.

“What!” Sirius yelled. “Why the fuck does she want to do that to my husband?”

“It’s part of the Werewolf Legislations,” Jack said angrily. “The law states that any werewolf who miscarries and survives must be rendered incapable of breeding. They claim it’s a way of ensuring good health in the werewolf, but it’s merely a form of control. The Ministry fear that any child produced by a werewolf will be a werewolf. That’s just not the case, there is no reported case of any child of a werewolf being infected themselves.”

Sirius stared at his rambling husband. He really hated Delores Umbridge. She’d had it in for Remus for years, ever since she had first entered the Ministry. She had seen him as an easy target, and had launched a vendetta against him. While Sirius had been imprisoned, Remus had been unable to find a job in the Wizarding World that lasted more than a few months, he had been forced to live with Anne once again, as Umbridge had taken their flat from him, and she had not let him gain custody of Harry alone. Remus had not even been able to access their Gringotts vault, or claim himself as Sirius’ husband. Their marriage had been declared frozen the moment Umbridge got her hands on their case. 

In short, Umbridge had ruined his life. 

And now she was trying to do it again.

“She can’t do that,” Sirius whispered. “Not to my Remus, not to my sweet wolf. She can’t.”

“There is a way around it,” Sam said, and Sirius looked hopefully at him.

“We can dose him with a potion to sterilise him,” Jack said. “He will still be able to enjoy a normal sex life, but he will be incapable of fathering or carrying children.”

“What if I carried the child? What if Remus got me pregnant? He could have the child he wants. Or, what if he carries again, could he do that?” Sirius asked hopefully. Remus wanted a baby they had created, there must be a way to get it for him. 

Sam sighed and looked at Solarin. The girl had interned with him, spent a summer learning how to change drips and take blood. She had shown quite the skill with delivering bad news. Sam didn’t know how to say what needed to be said without making the situation worse, but Sirius needed to understand.

“It’s not possible,” Solarin said.

“Why not?” Sirius asked.

“Sirius, Remus only survived this because he’s a werewolf. The thing that gave him the strength to live through it until this point is his infection. But Remus won’t survive another miscarriage, and he cannot carry a child to term, his body just won’t allow it,” she explained, trying to be as diplomatic as she could.

“Fine, I get that,” the Animagus said. “But what if I carried it?”

“You would not survive much past conception,” Severus said. “Your body would not accept a pregnancy, there was just too much damage done to you in Azkaban. I am sorry, but the two of you cannot have your own biological child.”

Sirius stared at his lover. Remus really had tried for the impossible. And it had damn near killed him, it could still kill him. Sirius, for the first time since he went after Peter, didn’t care what Remus wanted. It didn’t matter, if he lived through this. With the potion Sam mentioned, Remus would never be like this again.

“Do it,” Sirius said firmly, finding a new hope. “This potion to sterilise him. Give it to him.”

“We can’t. It has to be given with Remus’ consent, it cannot be given with your consent for him,” Jack said.

“But he can’t give his consent.”

“Sirius,” Sam said. “This is a very invasive potion, he has to be conscious to take it. If he lives through this, we’ll convince him to take it. But, until then, the priority is to get him through this.”

They all sat in silence, watching Remus writhe on the bed, proclaiming in tortured cries that Sirius was innocent, that he wouldn’t do that, that they were wrong. Each hazy statement made Sirius weep a little harder, until he was permanently gripping Solarin, who was crying her own tears.

Finally, as the sun started to rise, Remus’ fever broke and he fell back into his exhausted sleep. They removed the ice bags and towels and other various methods they’d used to fight the skyrocketing temperature, covered him with the duvet once more, and left the room, moving to their own rooms to try and get some sleep. 

Sirius slipped into the bed, curling up on his side to watch Remus sleep. He chuckled.

“Do you remember the first time we made love?” he asked the unconscious man. “It was sixth year. Everyone else had gone to Hogsmeade, it was the Christmas trip, the one for all the students that stayed for Christmas. They were all excited about the decorations and the feast and stuffing their faces with sweets. Not me. And you were bored of Hogsmeade, you never went after third year. Well, except our night time jaunts on the full moon.” He sniggered, toying with a lock of Remus’ sweat soaked hair. “I was excited about getting the whole day alone with you. No Peter tagging along, no James wanting to go flying, no one but you and me. We ended up in the dorm and we were sitting on your bed, playing Exploding Snap. That didn’t last. Before long, we were both nude and sucking each other off. And then you pinned me to the bed. I’ll never forget it.”

He sighed, running his fingertip along Remus’ nose, stroking his eyelashes, tracing his lips. To Sirius, his lover was the most beautiful thing in the whole world. “All those rumours about me sleeping around were just that, rumours. I’ve never slept with anyone but you, you know. You’re my first, my only. That first time, you took ages preparing me, making sure I was ready. It made me feel so loved, so cherished. I remember how good it felt, having you inside me that very first time, having you touch me. I kept thinking that it didn’t matter anymore that no one else wanted me, as long as I had you. Afterwards, you curled up with me, your head on my chest, stroking little circles on my belly. The two of us watched the snow.” 

Sirius laughed. “Do you remember how it turned into a blizzard and everyone was stranded in Hogsmeade for three days? They couldn’t even light the fires to floo back to school, the snow and wind kept getting down the chimneys and their spells wouldn’t take. Merlin, James was pissed off. He got lumbered with sharing a room above Zonko’s with Macnair. But I loved those three days. It was just us, all alone in Gryffindor Tower. I got to sleep in your bed with you, all cuddled up against the cold, and all that time we spent curled up on a sofa under a blanket in front of the common room fireplace. Dumbledore lit that fire for us, and the one in the dorm. He told you what a wonderful couple we made, do you remember? You know, it still makes me laugh that Hogwarts managed to light fires and Hogsmeade couldn’t. Maybe it’s because Hogwarts is bigger or because Dumbledore lit them or something like that.” 

He leaned in and kissed Remus’ temple. “That first morning, after the house elves brought us breakfast, you took me again, so slow, so gentle. I remember the way we laid together afterwards, your warm arms around me, kissing my neck. And then you said it. You said that I was your mate, that we were going to be together forever. I can’t remember anything else after that, it’s all fuzzy.”

Sirius swallowed, his eyes stinging with tears. It couldn’t have all been a lie, it just couldn’t. Remus had said forever. But, then again, Sirius had screwed that one up. So much for forever when you’re being taken away to Azkaban. 

“I’m so sorry, Moony. I’m so sorry. If I had just kept my head, you wouldn’t have been alone, Umbridge wouldn’t have been able to get at you, everything would have been fine. We wouldn’t be here now.” He sniffed, wiping away his flowing tears. “Please, Remus. Please don’t leave me.”

Sirius lay there staring at him, watching the morning sun creep across him, before the heavens opened and the heat wave broke. He cracked open the windows and listened to the sound of the rain, the steady beep of the heart monitor.

He fell asleep listening to Remus fight to hold on, and remembering their first kiss, that rainy day in fifth year.

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Sirius awoke to gentle fingers toying with his hair and the sound of a full blown thunderstorm. He groaned and snuggled further into the warm bedding.

“What time is it? Is it time for breakfast?” he mumbled and was met by an amused chuckle.

“I suspect we’ve missed breakfast altogether.”

Sirius sat up so fast he managed to crack his back and topple out of bed, which earned him another amused chuckle as he swore. He rubbed his head where he had hit it on the nightstand and sat up, peeking over the edge of the mattress. 

“That was so smooth,” Remus said, smirking at him. “Definitely showing that pure blood you’ve got. So sophisticated.”

Sirius got up and slid back into the bed, hovering over Remus, stroking his cheek. Remus reached up and tangled his weak fingers into his husbands blue black hair, tugging him down for a kiss. Sirius lost himself in it, using the kiss to reassure himself, to prove that Remus was going to be okay.

Remus pulled away, hissing in pain.

“What the fuck did you do to my dick?” Remus demanded, pulling at the blankets and his boxers so he could look down. Sirius chuckled. “What the hell is that?”

“It’s a catheter. Sam put it in,” Sirius explained.

“Well, take it out. It doesn’t go with a hard-on.”

Sirius dissolved into a full laughing fit, which turned into body wracking sobs that terrified Remus.

“Sirius? Angel, what’s wrong?”

Sirius would have punched him, if he wasn’t so pale and fragile looking still. So instead, he fixed him with an accusing glare.

“What’s wrong? What’s wrong! You scared me half to death, that’s what’s wrong!” he snapped, making the werewolf look guilty. “You have no idea, no fucking idea, what last night was like!”

He stood up, pacing angrily. 

“I thought I was going to lose you! I very nearly did! After all we’ve been through, after all the things we’ve faced, after how bloody hard we worked to be together again! Merlin, you were bleeding out on our bathroom floor! You spent most of the night being iced down, rambling deliriously with a temperature of 108! You almost died! And Phoenix! Fucking hell, she fell apart, Remus! Both of them did,” he reeled off, getting calmer as he went on. “Our children fell apart because their papa was upstairs, an inch from death.”

“I’m sorry,” Remus whispered and Sirius climbed back onto the bed, pulling him to sit up, careful of the chest drain, and cradled him in his arms.

“Too right you’re sorry.” He sighed at the feel of his husbands slim arms wrapping around his shoulders. “Don’t you ever do anything like this again.”

“Never. I promise, Sirius, I’ll never do this again.” Remus was crying into his neck and Sirius began to cry with him, rubbing his back. “The baby’s gone, isn’t it?”

“Yes, it’s gone. It just wasn’t meant to be, honey. But I know why you did it, I know now.”

Remus pulled back and looked him in the eye. “So I didn’t dream it? I did hear you talking to me?”

“Yes, I was talking to you.”

“And you know why I did this?”

“I know, honey, I figured it out. And I am so sorry I left you all alone. I swear to whatever deity is up there, I’m never leaving you again. But you’re a fucking imbecile, you know that, right?”

Remus was utterly baffled. “Why am I an imbecile?” he asked timidly and Sirius smiled at him.

“Remus, you already have two pieces of me that can’t be taken from you. You have Phoenix and Harry.”

This caused Remus to gape at him for a moment and then dissolve into another bout of tears. “Oh God, oh Sirius, I could have left them! My sweet little star, my sweet little lion! Oh God, I would have left them!” he sobbed, clutching at Sirius’ shirt. “What the fuck was I thinking? Sirius, what the hell was I doing? Why couldn’t I see it? Why couldn’t I see what I already had?”

Sirius held him close, rocking him. “Hush, honey, it’s all right, it’s all okay now. You’re still here, and you see it now,” Sirius soothed, ignoring the heart monitor frantically beeping. 

Eventually, Remus cried himself out and pulled back, looking at his lover. “I heard you. You talked to me all night,” Remus said, stroking one fine cheekbone with his thumb. “I never knew I was your only one. I always thought there were others before me. I didn’t know it was me you gave your virginity to.”

“I kissed others before you, but it never felt quite right, kissing the others. And I admit there was the odd blow job by some over eager partner, but it never went any further than that. As soon as you kissed me the very first time, I knew that there wasn’t meant to be anyone else kissing me but you. And when you took me the first time, I knew I couldn’t ever let anyone else have me but you,” Sirius said, tracing Remus’ spine with an elegant finger. “You are the only one I’ve let have me.”

Remus smiled at him, one of his huge sunshine smiles, and kissed him, snaking his tongue inside. Sirius duelled with it, a few tears of relief falling down his face. Remus was okay, he was going to be fine. Well, Sirius was still waiting for him to demand a cup of tea. Once he heard that, he would let himself relax. Remus yanked away, grimacing.

“Circe! Get Sam, would you? Get him to take all these bloody tubes out of me, starting with this one,” Remus said, motioning to his duvet covered crotch. “And while you’re at it, a cup of tea would be nice.”

Sirius sighed. There it was. Thank Merlin. He propped Remus up on a pile of pillows and moved to the door, smiling as he went. He stopped at the door and looked around at his husband, gnawing his lower lip.

“There’s something I didn’t tell you,” he said and the werewolf nodded for him to continue. “When I was found guilty, when they took me away, I wasn’t laughing. All the papers said I laughed, but they were wrong. I was screaming your name.” Remus gaped at him and he smiled shyly. “I know I told you I screamed, but I should have told you years ago it was your name I screamed. I thought you should know.”

And with that he slipped from the room, scrubbing his hands through his hair as he made his way down to the kitchen. He walked in and the whole room went silent.

“He’s awake, sitting up and demanding a cup of tea,” Sirius announced and Sam laughed, followed soon after by everyone else laughing in relief. Phoenix threw herself at Sirius and he scooped her up, twirling her around.

“How is he?” Solarin asked as Phoenix was placed on her feet and Sirius noticed how ill the elder augur looked. “He wasn’t very happy a minute ago.”

“Have you been reading all of this? Have you read everything we’ve thrown out?” he asked in disbelief. 

She nodded. “I couldn’t block it, the emotions were too strong. Even I have my limits, you know. But forget about me, I’ll be fine an a day or two. How is he?”

“Upset and weak.”

She nodded and handed him the requested cup of tea. “He’ll be okay, he’s strong. He’ll make it through this.”

Sirius kissed her cheek and turned to Sam. “He wants the tubes out.” Sam concurred and the two of them walked up to the bedroom, Remus sighing as they entered.

“Thank Merlin. Take these flipping tubes out and stop that bloody beeping,” he demanded and Sam smiled.

“Definitely going to be absolutely fine,” the healer muttered as he pulled on a pair of gloves, grabbed a load of cotton balls and a roll of tape, a basin to put all the needles in, and a few other pieces of equipment that made Remus squirm.

“Tea,” Sirius said, placing it on the nightstand.

“Okay, Remus, which one first?” Sam said once he had finished arranging all his bits and pieces.

“This one,” the younger werewolf said, throwing back the blankets. Sam chuckled and nodded.

“Okay, try to relax for me,” he said as he exposed his patient. Remus nodded and hissed as it was removed.

“I don’t care what the reason is, no one is ever doing that to me again,” Remus said as he was covered over once more. Sam smiled and removed the chest drain, which required stitches and a healing balm to deal with the wound left behind. Sam removed the drip, then the cannulas, and finally the heart monitor, which ripped out some chest hair and made Remus wince.

“Free wax with every miscarriage,” Sam joked and Remus laughed, setting Sam’s mind at ease. Sam cleared away all the used medical equipment while Remus sipped his tea. “I’ve got something else for you to laugh at. Did you know about your mother and my father?”

“What?” Remus asked, Sirius grabbing the mug of tea as Remus threatened to spill it all over himself. “My mother and your father?”

“Yup. Saw them this morning, kissing over the orange juice.”

“You’re kidding,” Sirius demanded. “Anne and Jack? No way.”

“I am very serious. If you don’t believe me, ask Harry and Severus, they saw it too. Dad and Anne don’t know they were seen. Yet.”

They sat in silence, Sam checking Remus over and proclaiming him to be doing excellently, until there was a timid knock at the door. Anne stood in the doorway, close to collapsing with relief, Harry and Phoenix standing with her. Remus opened his arms and was rewarded with both teens barrelling forwards to clamber onto the bed and cuddle up to him, and his mother sliding onto the bed to cuddle him close to her.

“Cubs, what is that?” Remus asked and Sirius smiled.

“It’s a tame wolf cub,” Solarin said as she walked in carrying a tray which she set on the dresser. “You can have him if you want him.”

Remus grabbed the tiny cub making a bid for freedom off the edge of the mattress and looked at it. “Where did he come from?” She passed him the letter from the top of the box and he gazed at her. “Sol, you look terrible. Are you all right?”

“Look who’s talking,” she joked and he blushed. “I’m fine. Give me a day or two and I’ll be back to my old self.” He nodded and read the letter, frowning.

“Are you sure you don’t want him?” Remus asked, motioning to the cub now trying to lick his nose.

“Definitely not. He’s yours, if you want him.” Remus nodded and she grinned. “Right, that’s settled then. Hey, Nix, you want to come with me to get some things for the cub?”

The blonde nodded and kissed Remus’ cheek before she scrambled off the bed, following Solarin out of the room. Harry left soon after to go and feed Miri. 

Remus looked up at his mother. “I’m sorry, mum,” he mumbled and she hugged him closer.

“Don’t be sorry. Just promise me you’ll never ever in a million years even-if-the-world-is-ending-you-still-won’t try this again,” she demanded. He nodded and then frowned.

“Wait, we didn’t plan this pregnancy, it was an accident. What’s to stop it happening again?” Remus asked and Sam sighed, sitting down on the bed near his feet.

“Remus, there’s a part of the Werewolf Legislations that says that, now you have survived a miscarriage, you have to be rendered incapable of breeding,” the older lycanthrope began and Remus shook his head, his eyes filled with fear. “Relax, we’re not going to hand you over to the Ministry. Hell will freeze over before I let some little twit near you. But the law is still there.”

Remus sighed in relief. “What does it mean, ‘rendered incapable of breeding’?”

“It means made incapable of producing children.”

“How do you do that?”

“Well, there are two options open to you. The first is the Ministry method which is to eunuchise you. The second is my method, which is to sterilise you,” Sam explained, giving Remus the choice. It was his body, his choice.

“What the bloody hell is eunuchise?” Remus asked. 

“It means to render you incapable of more than just breeding. You would be left unable to mate ever again.”

“What?”

“You would be unable to feel any sexual desires. Subsequently, you would not be able to perform sexually, and the process is permanent,” Sam explained.

Remus laughed. “You can rule that one right out. No way is anyone doing that to me, no fucking way,” he said firmly, Anne chuckling at him.

“No one is going to do that, it’s barbaric. Some convoluted attempt to control the werewolf population,” Anne explained. “The Ministry believe that any child born of a werewolf will inherit the condition.”

“But it doesn’t work that way,” Remus argued.

“We know that, but Umbridge doesn’t,” Sirius said and Remus shuddered involuntarily. 

“Why did you bring her up? Oh! Oh! Are you going to tell me she met a sticky end? Are you going to tell me she got eaten by a werewolf? Because that would be brilliant!” he asked excitedly and they all laughed at him.

“I wish,” Sirius muttered. “No, Moony, she didn’t get eaten, more’s the pity. Unfortunately, she’s still walking around in one piece and getting too big for her boots again. She’s the one who wants to eunuchise you.”

Remus growled and Sam shrank back. The only one in the pack above Remus at this point was Sirius, and Sam wasn’t fool enough to think Remus wouldn’t attack him for challenging him the day before.

“Don’t worry, I know you didn’t mean your challenge, you can relax,” Remus reassured and Sam breathed a sigh of relief. “So, what about your method? What’s in this sterilising thing?”

“Well,” Sam began. “We would dose you with a potion. It would make you feel pretty ill for a day or two, but that is the only side effect. What this potion does is two things. Firstly, it destroys the part of your magic that is responsible for trying to create life. This means that you would never conceive again, it just wouldn’t happen. You would never be able to get pregnant.”

“Okay, I’m with you so far. What about the second thing it does?” Remus asked.

Sam glanced at Anne and she smiled at him, nodding. She was a mother, she had heard it all before. “Well, the second effect is to do with your testicles. It would render you incapable of producing sperm, so you could never get Sirius pregnant. This potion would leave you unable to ever father or carry a child, but you would still be able to enjoy a perfectly normal sex life.”

“But, what if Sirius carried the child?” Remus demanded. “There are two of us. Surely, Sirius could carry a child.”

“I can’t, Remus,” Sirius said. “Too much damage was done to me in Azkaban. It would kill me, I wouldn’t make it much past conception. And, before you suggest it, you won’t survive another miscarriage. And you would miscarry, you’re just not designed to carry a child. Remus, we can’t try this again, we just can’t. No matter which one of us carried the baby.”

Remus snuggled further into his mother, letting her stroke his hair as he thought it over. Never? There was no chance of ever having their own biological child? Remus was slightly worried by the lack of disappointment that came with that news. Why was that? Why didn’t he feel like he was losing some important opportunity? And why was he not mourning the baby the way he felt he should be? He couldn’t say it to Sam, or his mother. They wouldn’t understand. No one had ever understood him as well as Sirius.

“I need to talk to my husband alone,” Remus said and Sam led Anne from the room. As they left, Sirius climbed into bed with him, stroking his cheek.

“What’s up, honey?” the Animagus asked and Remus chewed his lip.

“Why am I not grieving? I don’t even feel disappointed about the baby. And I don’t feel like I’m losing a chance to have a piece of you. Why? I don’t understand,” he whispered. 

Sirius stared at him. “Merlin, you really can be dense sometimes, you know that right?” he said and his husband fixed him with a confused glare. “Remus, this was never about the baby. It was never the baby you wanted. It was me. And now you know that you have me, and you’re not going to lose me. You know now that I’m never going anywhere again, I’m never ever leaving. As Harry keeps saying, no one escapes this madhouse. So, like it or not, I’m staying. And those pieces of me you wanted, the ones you could keep forever, even if I’m not here? You have them. Harry and Phoenix. You have what you wanted, and you understand that you had them all along. That’s why you’re not grieving, and it’s why you don’t feel like you’re losing a chance to have a piece of me.”

Remus stared at him, a slow smile creeping across his face. “I love you,” he said softly and pulled his lover in for a kiss. This time, there was no pulling away in pain. This time, he grabbed Sirius’ hand and pushed it to his hardening cock. “Please, Siri.”

“Remus, you nearly died last night, we shouldn’t be doing this,” Sirius said firmly. “When you get the all clear, I will give you all the orgasms you like. And when you want to, I will play all the games you want while you reassert yourself as alpha. But, just for now, let’s err on the side of caution, okay?”

Remus groaned, but he could see the sense behind it. “Fine,” he grumbled, pulling that fine boned hand away from his rapidly deflating erection. “But as soon as Sam says we can, the first thing I want is for you to suck me off.”

Sirius bit his tongue to keep himself from doing it right there and then, possible consequences be damned. How the hell could Remus reduce him to a horny teenager again? He willed away his own hard-on. Now was not the time.

“As soon as he says we can, I’m going to show you just how much I love you,” Sirius said and Remus smiled.

“Tell Sam I’ll take the potion. I’ll have the sterilisation.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

On Friday morning, two days after Remus woke up, Harry wandered downstairs to the basement potions lab to find his husband. Something strange was going on, and he couldn’t quite figure out what it was. But Severus would. He knocked and waited for Severus to ask who it was. He wasn’t about to walk in unannounced and potentially startle the man, that could lead to something important being ruined or Severus accidentally blowing himself up. Either way, Harry would be in trouble.

“It’s me. Can I join you?” Harry called through the door.

“Where is Miri?” came the rich baritone, if slightly muffled, reply. Harry smiled guiltily. Last time he had tried to join Severus, he had forgotten the rule of no babies in the lab and Severus nearly had a heart attack.

“With Molly and Anne.”

“Then yes, you may join me.”

Harry slipped in to the stifling room. It was actually a nice change to the rest of the house, which was freezing. One thunderstorm and the whole house became an ice cube, no matter how many fires were lit. Harry dreaded to think how cold it would be once winter set in. The pounding rain hadn’t let up yet, and Harry jumped every time there was a clap of thunder. 

Severus was standing over a cauldron, sprinkling in carefully measured willow bark. Harry hoisted himself onto a free bench, letting his feet swing back and forth as he looked around. There were several other cauldrons scattered around the room, bubbling away, each at a different stage of completion. Floating above each of the cauldrons was an order form charmed to make it impermeable to flames, fumes, and anything else that could destroy it or cause it to flutter down into the concoction. Severus’ owl order business had taken off with flying colours, and he spent his time in his lab while Harry was in tuition with one of his fathers. Shelves lined the walls, filled with jars and bottles in varying shapes and sizes, filled with weird and wonderful things. Each container was meticulously labelled, and Severus charmed the room each time he left it to prevent Solarin and Bill messing with his painstaking organising.

“Something on your mind?” Severus asked as he stirred, passing Harry a jar. Whenever Harry joined him, when it was just the two of them with a bunch of simmering cauldrons, Severus let him help. “I require them to be a fine powder.”

“Fine powder. Yes, there is something on my mind. I have a question. Well, I have one which may lead to more, and it’s safe for me to ask you. Plus, I like watching you work. What are you making?” Harry reeled off as he began crushing the yellow flowers in a pestle and mortar. “Is it something for Remus? Do you want the whole jarful crushed?”

Severus smiled at him. “Yes, the whole jarful. And what makes you think it is for Remus?”

“The wolfsbane flowers I’m crushing. Wolfsbane is poisonous for humans, but it’s safe for werewolves, so this is either for Remus or Sam, and Remus is the more likely candidate for a potion right now. I suppose it could be for an order, but my guess is that it’s something for Remus seeing as there’s no order form for this cauldron.”

“Very good. Ten points to Gryffindor, Mr Potter,” Severus praised and Harry smiled. “It is the sterilisation potion. Your fathers insisted that I be the one to make it. After their experience with Madame Mystic, I can see why.”

Harry shuddered and handed his lover the mortar, now full of bright yellow powder. “You know what, I’m never taking anything made by anyone but you.”

“I would not let you take anything made by someone other than myself. I am a master for a reason. The only exception would be Solarin,” Severus said as he mixed the powder into the potion.

“Is she as good as you?”

“She was trained by me, she is the only brewer I would trust. Now, that needs to stew for an hour before I add anything else. You said you had questions,” Severus prompted as he left the potion to simmer, setting the timer.

“Can we stay in here while you answer them?”

“Of course. Are you feeling all right, love?” the older man asked, stroking Harry’s cheek, standing between Harry’s knees, his other hand resting on his slim thigh.

“I’m fine. I just want to be alone with you.”

Severus smiled and leaned in, kissing him. Harry wrapped his arms around his husband’s shoulders, responding immediately. He loved it when it was just the two of them. They didn’t get uninterrupted time together very often during the course of a day, not with so many people living in one house, even more of them on the weekends, and a teething baby to care for. Plus, there were orders for Severus to brew, lessons for Harry to attend, and chores for them both. Bedtime was the only real time they had. It was rare that the two of them just got a moment alone, and they took full advantage of those moments.

Harry moaned as Severus’ tongue teased his, then moved on to tickle the roof of his mouth, something Harry adored. The man had a positively wicked tongue when he was verbally abusing someone, but when he was kissing Harry, it became sinful. Harry reasoned that if his husbands kisses were going to send him straight to hell, at least he was going to enjoy the ride. They were interrupted by a loud clap of thunder that made Harry jump.

“Ouch!”

Harry blushed and stroked Severus cheek. “Sorry, Severus.”

“You know, at seventeen, you really should be past being frightened of thunder. Especially when it’s my tongue that gets bitten,” Severus joked and Harry squirmed, staring out at the room. Harry rubbed at his wrists and Severus immediately became concerned, replacing Harry’s hands with his own, caressing the scars. “Harry? Did I say something wrong?”

“No, not wrong. There was a thunderstorm the day you saved me,” Harry explained, smiling at the gentle touch from his husband. “Don’t you remember the way the thunder echoed through Malfoy Manor while you were working on the manacles?”

Severus ran his fingers through the unruly raven tresses and lifted Harry’s head to look at him. “I’d forgotten all about that. If you want, you can take a calming draught. It will help if the storm is making you nervous,” he suggested and Harry shook his head.

“No, it’s not that I’m nervous. And the thunder doesn’t frighten me. It’s just…well, every time the thunder goes, I think about how glad I was to see you. And it takes me by surprise, even now. I didn’t think anyone would save me, I’d stopped hoping. And then there you were. You’re my hero,” Harry admitted shyly. 

Severus smiled and kissed him, letting Harry stroke his sore tongue with his own. “You are mine, my Harry,” he whispered against Harry’s lips before he stole another kiss.

“Forever,” Harry whispered back, resting his forehead against Severus’.

“You can jump all you like, love, so long as it is good thoughts that are causing it. So, do you still want to ask your questions? Or do you just want to sit here with me for a while?” Severus asked softly.

“Can I do both?”

“Of course,” the Potions Master said as he sat down on the bench next to Harry. “What is your main query, love?”

“I was wondering what’s going on between Sam and Tonks,” the Seeker said as he entwined their fingers.

“What do you mean?”

“Sol and Bill don’t want to leave the two of them in the same room together. And Tonks keeps giving Sam funny looks. And there’s something off about the way Sam flirts with Tonks. It’s not the same as when he flirts with Nix or Hermione, or anyone really. It’s not playful when he does it with her, he really means it.”

“Yes, I have noticed the same things, but Sol will not talk to me about it. Even Bill is managing to keep his mouth shut, something I didn’t think he could do around me,” Severus agreed. “Do you have a theory about what it may be?”

“How did you know I would?” Harry asked, smiling.

“Because my beautiful husband has a brilliant inquisitive mind,” Severus replied, kissing his temple. “So, what is your latest theory?”

Harry giggled. “Do you remember when you told me that Sam hasn’t found a lasting mate yet?”

“Yes,” Severus said. He knew how Harry worked. To validate his theories, he checked his facts first and then made an informed observation. Severus was usually the one confirming the information, and he had become quite good at speculating with his lover.

“And you said true mates are rare,” Harry said.

“Yes, I did say that.”

“Well, what makes Remus and Sirius so special? Is it just because they’re true mates?”

“No, it is not just that. Your fathers are so unique because it is rare for a werewolf to find their true mate in the form of a human, and it is virtually unheard of for a mating between a human and a werewolf to go the distance. Remus and Sirius have been together over twenty years,” Severus explained. “Wasn’t this in your reading?”

“It was, but I just want to be sure. Severus, could Tonks be Sam’s mate? Could that be what Sol and Bill are so worried about?”

Severus looked at him confusedly. “It could be possible, based on their behaviour around each other, but that would not explain why my sister and her husband are so worried. You know, no matter how many times I refer to them as being married, I still can’t quite make myself believe they actually did it.”

Harry sniggered. “They’ve got the rings to prove it, and the marriage license,” he pointed out.

“It’s still not getting through to my brain,” Severus said. “Anyway, we were talking about Sam and Tonks. Where were we? Oh yes, them being mates not explaining Solarin and Bill’s behaviour. I cannot see what the problem would be if Sam and Tonks are mates.”

“Didn’t Tonks say she wasn’t the type to settle down?”

It was like a light bulb going on in Severus’ mind. “Oh, I follow! Well, no wonder those two are so worried.”

“Explain,” Harry commanded.

“If a werewolf is rejected by their mate after the bond is formed they can become very ill, some even die from it. That is why Remus was so frail looking when he was your teacher. He felt betrayed by Sirius, by his apparent guilt. He was quite ill. If Tonks is indeed Sam’s mate, and she chooses to walk away after they have mated, it could have some very bad consequences for him,” Severus reasoned. “Solarin could be trying to save Sam unnecessary problems by running interference.”

Any further comment was cut off by the sound of said augur crying out Bill’s name in pleasure. 

Severus groaned and Harry’s face blazed. “Silencing charm,” they muttered.

An hour later the whole family started to convene in the kitchen for lunch. As soon as Harry and Severus entered the kitchen, Molly handed Miri to her carrier.

“We can’t figure out what she’s saying,” Molly said. “I thought it was something about one of her toys, but she rejected all of them.”

“I thought it was something to do with the clock,” Anne suggested. “But she said no when we pointed to it.”

Harry smiled and kissed Miri’s forehead. “Thank you for watching her for me. I’m sure I’ll figure out whatever it is she’s saying,” he reassured the two smiling witches before he looked at his daughter. “Come on, sweetheart, tell carrier.”

“Tis,” she said, snuggling into his shoulder.

“Ah, your teeth. All right, baby, show me,” he instructed. He was becoming very fluent in Miri-speak, as Phoenix had dubbed it. There were times, like now, when he was the only one who could understand her.

She opened her mouth and pointed her teeny finger at her lower gums. Harry could see the tiny white speck of a tooth just visible through the pink flesh.

“Who’s my clever girl for cutting her first tooth, at long last? Shall we show daddy?” he asked as he walked over to where Severus was watching them. She held out her little arms to him and the ex-Slytherin cuddled her close, telling her how clever she was as she showed him. “I’m not so sure about breast feeding her now she has an actual tooth to bite me with,” Harry said.

“She never uses you as a teething ring, it should be safe still,” Severus said before he sat the little girl on the edge of the table. “Miri, what do you not use for teeth?” 

She pointed at Harry. “No tis caya.”

The two men smiled. “Good girl,” Severus praised. “Now, Miri, what do you want for lunch? Do you want peaches?”

“Ta.”

“I’m really starting to love her talking,” Harry commented as he crossed to the fridge, taking out a pot of pureed peaches and a baby bottle of water. “It’s so much easier.”

“Look who’s well enough to make it downstairs,” Anne said as Remus entered the kitchen, leaning on Sirius.

“I felt it was time,” Remus said. “What’s Miri eating today?”

“Peaches.”

“How is the weaning going?” Sirius asked as he helped Remus to the table, Anne fussing over the frail lycanthrope.

“Very well. She hasn’t managed to finish a whole pot yet, but she’s getting there,” Severus said as Harry poured Miri’s lunch into her little red bowl before bringing it to the table with one of her plastic spoons and the bottle. “We find it best to offer her solids instead of her lunchtime nursing. She didn’t take to the baby cereals at breakfast, but she does enjoy her fruit at lunch. It seems to be working, at least, it has for the last four days. We’ll cross our fingers for peaches on day five.”

“Clever little witch. I can’t wait to be able to hold her again,” Remus said as Harry pulled the highchair over to the table. 

Sam had pronounced that Remus would have to wait until the first of October to be allowed to use magic once more, so he could not hold Miri until then. He and Sirius had also been forbidden from having sex until the first, which both of them were ready to weep at.

“Rus, Rus, Rus,” Miri said excitedly, pointing at him, making him smile and wave at her. Then she pointed at Sirius. “Sis. Sis dah.”

Sam walked in, looking unusually gloomy. “Clever girl. Though even I can’t translate that last word. I bet your Aunt Sol has been teaching you words without telling carrier or daddy the meanings. Miri, where’s Sam?” Harry asked her as he retrieved her from Severus and put her in her chair.

“Sum,” she replied obediently, pointing at the miserable man as Harry strapped her in. The tiny girl patted the tray of her chair as she caught sight of her bowl. “Duns.” 

Apparently, lunch, or ‘duns’ as it pronounced in Miri-speak, was more exciting than the elder werewolf.

“Sorry, Uncle Sam. You’ve been replaced by peach mush as the main attraction,” Harry said to the healer as he sat down. “I tried, but lunch is too much of a lure for her.”

“Ah, fair choice. I think any intelligent woman would choose peach mush over me,” Sam said as he slumped at the table. “I think the peach mush is better for a woman than me.”

Harry bit his tongue so he didn’t say anything he might regret, but he did share a worried glance with Severus as the tall man passed to help Molly chop vegetables. “Where is everyone?” Harry asked to distract himself as he accepted a bib from Anne, fastening it around his daughters neck.

“Bill just flooed back to work and Sol has not come down yet. Phoenix was in the dining room watching the storm, though I don’t know if she’s still there, I think Charlie was with her. The baby twins are with their parents, who are loving the extra few days with their children. Jack was in his room the last time I saw him,” Anne reeled off as she placed plates on the table. “Bill did mention something about the prankster twins popping in, and maybe Tonks. Apart from that, I have no idea who else is coming for lunch.”

Remus pulled his attentions away from the baby augur happily slurping at her meal to fix his amber gaze on his mother.

“Mum?”

“Yes, darling?” she replied as she rummaged for knives and forks.

“I heard something very interesting about you,” Remus said lightly, Sirius grinning next to him. Harry and Severus caught on and tried to hide their smiles, and Sam looked much brighter all of a sudden.

“Is that so? Well, I enjoy a good rumour as much as the next mother. What did you hear?” she replied as she passed Sam cutlery to set out.

“I heard that you were kissing Jack over the orange juice,” he said innocently and she spun around to stare at him in shock. “Were you caught kissing the nice healer, mummy?”

“Who told you that?” she asked nervously.

“Oh, I never reveal my sources. Were you kissing him, mum? Are you dating the nice Healer Jones?” he teased.

“I don’t think that’s an appropriate topic for discussion,” she said evasively as she began to pour drinks.

“Anne and Jack, sittin’ in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g,” Sirius sung and she flushed a bright red.

“Come on, mum, just tell us if it’s true,” Remus persisted as his mother slapped his husband with the tea towel, Sirius sniggering as he defended himself.

She stared warily at her son for a moment, chewing her lip nervously, before she sat down next to him. “You know I loved your father, don’t you? I mean, if I were dating Jack, you wouldn’t think I was trying to replace him, would you?” she asked and Remus smiled.

“Mum, dad died nine years ago. And I know you loved him. If you are dating Jack then it’s fine with me,” he reassured. “I know you wouldn’t try to replace dad.”

She looked at Sam. “And you know that I would never try and take your mothers place, don’t you?”

“Of course I do, Anne. Besides, my mother died thirty three years ago, it’s about bloody time he started dating someone, and I can’t think of a better woman for him than you,” he said with a wink.

She smiled at him. “Then yes, I am dating Jack.”

“Hey, this kind of makes Jack and Sam permanent fixtures,” Harry said. “They’re not just pack members because Sam’s your wolf brother, Remus. This kind of makes Uncle Sam your step brother.”

Remus looked over at his healer. “What do you say, Sam? Feel like having a kind of step brother?” 

“What’s this about kind of step brothers?” Jack asked as he walked into the kitchen, cutting off Sam’s answer.

“I told them about you and I,” Anne revealed and Jack looked nervously at the two werewolves.

“Oh, for Merlin’s sake!” Sirius said with a smile. “Sam, Remus, do either of you have a problem with your parents kissing over the orange juice?”

“No,” said Remus.

“Of course not,” said Sam.

“Great. So nana and grandpa can stop worrying about upsetting anyone and we can get down to a real issue,” Sirius said, looking to Severus. “Can you tell your sister to remember Silencing Charms next time Bill misses his lunch hour for her?”

“I intend to,” Severus said as he chopped up carrots. “Oh, before I forget, the potion will be ready tomorrow morning at ten. It needs to simmer overnight.”

“Thank you, Severus,” Remus said.

“It is no problem. I think it is safe to say no one in this pack will be taking anything I have not brewed.”

“Definitely not.”

“Does that rule out things I brew too?” Solarin asked as she walked in carrying the laundry basket. 

“No, you are the only exception,” Severus said as Solarin placed the basket near the washing machine and snagged a carrot to chew on. “However, you are not exempt from Silencing Charms, young lady. No one in this house wants to know what you and Bill do behind closed doors.”

She blushed faintly and looked sheepishly at her brother. “I am so sorry. We kind of…”

“I do not have any desires to know,” he interrupted her. “Just tell me your forgetfulness does not extend to the Charm. Just tell me you are still remembering your contraceptive.”

She walked away from him, pulling at her hair. “We’re…umm…we’re not using it anymore,” she admitted quietly.

“What?” he half yelled, turning to face her while still holding his knife. “Solarin, what are you thinking? You have only been married five minutes, it is far too soon for you to be indulging in that kind of recklessness!”

“There’s not much point in trying to prevent a pregnancy if I can’t have children,” she said bluntly.

He deflated, looking penitent. “Oh, sweetheart, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t-”

“I really don’t want to talk about this. It’s fine, really. You forgot, I get it. I’m going to the bathroom,” she interrupted, sweeping from the room.

Severus put his knife on the chopping board and sighed, looking up at the ceiling as he leaned against the marble kitchen counter. “Great parenting form, Severus. Really, it was great. A little shaky on the dismount,” he muttered to himself. He looked at the other inhabitants of the room. “I shouldn’t have said that, should I?”

“Probably not,” Sirius agreed. “But she’ll get over it.”

“I have a big mouth,” the Potions Master muttered.

“Happens to the best of us,” Jack reassured.

“I should go and talk to her.”

“Oh no you shouldn’t. She just said she doesn’t want to talk about it,” Molly pointed out. “Leave her be. Trust me, it’s the best way to go.”

Severus glanced around at them and let his eyes land on Miri. Sam had said that Solarin being forced to hide her gift, to stop using it, around Tobias and for the four years she was away, coupled with the damage the Ministry did to her was what had caused her infertility to be so severe. Miri would have the same problem, but not to Solarin’s degree. Miri would not have the heartache his sister did. When the time came, many decades from now Severus hoped, for Miri to start thinking of starting a family, her chances of conceiving were much higher, and better, than Solarin’s. 

Severus was suddenly very thankful for Spinners End going up in flames. He was glad to be living in Grimmauld Place, glad of all the people around him, all the people there to help and give advice at the drop of a hat, any hat. Harry would not have the same difficulties he had faced with Solarin, and Severus himself would not have to struggle with Solarin alone anymore.

“Thank you,” Severus said firmly.

“For what?” Anne asked as she stirred the vegetable stew.

“For everything. Solarin and I, we never had anyone but each other. I mean, we had Albus and Mad-Eye, but they were always in the background, there if I really needed help. It wasn’t like this. It wasn’t a proper family. Thank you for giving us that,” he said.

“I think they get it, Sev.”

He looked up into the doorway to find Solarin standing there, watching him.

“I hate that nickname,” he growled.

“I know.”

“Are you all right?”

She sighed. “I’m fine. Sorry I snapped. I forget, and then something happens, or someone says something and I remember. And it hurts. I understand you forgetting. It’s okay, it’s not like you were trying to be tactless,” she said, crossing the room and letting him hug her. “Anyway, can we talk about something else, please?”

“Anne and Jack are dating,” Molly said and Solarin snorted.

“I could have told you that weeks ago.”

“What? How?” Jack spluttered.

“Your tastes,” she said simply, bending down and picking up the wolf cub licking her bare toes. “Does he have a name yet?”

“Sirius suggested Romulus,” Remus said with a smile.

“Poor pup. Lets not give Nix licence to mock him for the rest of his life,” she suggested as she handed him to Remus. “And Romulus would get shortened to Rom, or Lus, or something like that.”

“While everyone is pondering that, what do you mean by our ‘tastes’?” Anne asked.

“Magical signatures. You and Jack, your signatures match. It’s how I know a couple is meant to be together, if they follow the signs, that is.”

With that, Sam bolted from the room. They heard him slam the bathroom door and then vomiting. Solarin sighed.

“What is wrong with Sam? He’s been acting funny for a couple of weeks now,” Sirius said. 

As Remus opened his mouth to explain it, for he had figured it out too, Tonks flooed in for lunch. Remus leaned in close to his husband. 

“That is what’s wrong with Sam. She’s his mate.”

The room became a very tense place when Sam returned from the bathroom.

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The tension could have been cut with a knife, it was that thick. The whole pack kept throwing worried glances at Sam and Tonks. The elder werewolf and his mate were sat at opposite ends of the table. It was testament to how far Sam had gone with forming the bond with Tonks when he growled at his father for brushing Tonks’ hand as he passed her the rolls.

“Tonks, can I talk to you?” Solarin said as they began to clear away the dishes.

“No, I want a word with her,” Sam said sharply and Solarin took a deep breath to keep herself under control.

“I think it’s best if I talk to her,” she said to the twitching werewolf.

“No. Tonks…can I…umm…have a word…in private? Please?” he asked, finding it hard to get out what he wanted to say. 

The metamorphmagus looked at the two of them, trying to figure out what was wrong with the scene. She suddenly had the urge to get as far away from the werewolf as possible. She didn’t want to be alone with him, she didn’t even want to be in the same room as him. 

“Maybe some other time, Sam. I really should go and help Molly with the laundry,” Tonks said as she slowly began backing to the door.

“We really need to talk,” he persisted.

“I don’t want to talk to you.”

It was, apparently, the wrong thing to say. Sam was across the room and pinning her to the kitchen wall in seconds, taking the young Auror by surprise. Solarin was screaming for Sam to stop, trying to pull him away from her friend. But he brushed her off, sending her flying into the table. Tonks was terrified. The man had her hands pinned to the cold stone, she couldn’t get to her wand and she couldn’t free herself without it. She could not perform wandless magic, that was a natural talent she did not possess.

Sam could hear her heart beating frantically, the scent of her surrounding him, intoxicating him. Her skin was so soft under his hands, she fit perfectly where he pressed his lithe frame against her. She was gazing up at him with wide purple eyes, her lips parted in her surprise. Others were coming, he could hear them thundering across the room, their footsteps louder than the raging storm outside. He couldn’t stop himself, it was instinct taking over. She was his, meant to be with him, why couldn’t she understand that? He could feel it, why couldn’t she? Well, he would just have to make her feel it.

He leaned in and took her mouth with his own, kissing her roughly, his tongue snaking into her mouth to taste her. She tasted so sweet, so perfect, so impossibly young compared to him. She was trying to protest against his lips but his kiss turned her words into nothing more than startled cries, which turned him on. The more she struggled, the more he pressed her into the wall.

“Force Recall on him,” Severus commanded, but Solarin shook her head.

“I can’t. She’s too close, I could kill them both.”

Remus surprised them all by pulling himself to his feet and hobbling across the room. He grabbed Sam by the scruff of the neck and literally threw him off the young woman. Sam landed on the table and went rolling off it, landing in a heap on the floor. Tonks sped from the room, and they heard the slam of one of the upstairs bathroom doors.

Sam groaned and rubbed his head, and then had to cover it as Solarin launched herself at him. She hit every inch she could get hold of, and he was pretty sure he would end up with a black eye at least.

“You stupid, irresponsible prick! How could you? I warned you, Sam, me and Bill both warned you several times!” she screamed and Sirius grabbed her around the middle, pulling her off him.

“Let it go, Sol,” the Animagus said firmly and she stared at the cowering healer before she nodded.

Sam looked around, feeling like he had just come out of a weird dream. He couldn’t really remember what had happened, but their pitying stares told him he had done something really bad.

“What did I do?” Sam asked his father as he helped him up.

“You attacked Tonks,” Jack whispered and had to hold his son up as his knees buckled.

“Oh God! No, please, dad, tell me I didn’t,” the werewolf begged, gripping at Jack’s shoulders.

“You did. Come on, sit down.”

Sam sat at the table and Severus handed him a brandy. “Drink it, it will help,” he said and Sam gripped the glass with shaky hands. 

Sam sipped the alcohol as he watched Sirius help Remus back to his seat. It was coming back to him in bits.

“I went feral, didn’t I?” Sam whispered.

“Yes, you did, and you scared the poor girl half to death,” Remus said sternly. “You have to let us explain it to her, Sam.”

“No,” Sam argued. “She won’t accept it from you, any of you. It has to come from me.”

“Sam, you can’t even be in the same room as her right now,” Solarin said, pressing a tissue to her split lip. 

“How did you get that?” he asked timidly.

“Oh, it might have happened when you sent me flying. I tried to pull you off Tonks. Your wolf wasn’t too happy with me.”

Sam hung his head in shame. “I am so sorry.”

“Quit your apologies,” she snapped. “It’s not your fault, it’s the wolf. Well, almost the wolfs fault. You are the one who started forming a bond with the girl who doesn’t know what the fuck’s going on, but hey, I’m sure you just had selective hearing the twenty thousand times me and Bill told you not to.”

“Lay off the man, Sol,” Fred said.

“Stay out of it!” Sam snarled.

“That is enough!” Remus growled. “Fred, George, you cannot be here right now. Sam’s wolf sees you as a threat, you need to leave. It is not safe for you.”

“Go back to work, we’ll contact you when you’re less likely to be mauled,” Harry said.

The twins nodded and flooed out.

“Right, Sol, you go and talk to Tonks, explain it all to her,” Sirius ordered and Sam made to protest, but the alpha stopped him. “Sam, enough. Solarin will explain. You had your chance, your chance has passed. She needs to be told, and you are in no fit state to talk to her right now.”

Solarin left the room and Sam stared at his alpha. “I really screwed this up, didn’t I?” Sam asked.

“Just a bit. But, in this pack, all mistakes are fixable.”

“How the hell did you do it?” the healer questioned Remus. “You and Sirius. You two knew each other for five years before you acted, and even then, Sirius made the first move. I know her for a few weeks and I’m attacking her. How did you do it?”

“Amazing self restraint?” Anne suggested and Remus sniggered.

“Have you taken into consideration that I wasn’t a fully mature werewolf until I was fifteen? I matured in the July, me and Sirius got together in the October,” Remus said with a smile. “Those months were tough, I’ll admit. But they were worth it.”

“Well worth it,” Sirius concurred.

“Give Tonks time, and let Solarin talk her around,” Remus said. “You’d be amazed at how good that girl is at getting people to listen.”

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Solarin did indeed get Tonks to listen, and come out of the bathroom. And then Sam wished for a lightning bolt to fry him.

“Why didn’t you say something?” the pink haired Auror demanded as she shoved him into the half finished playroom, slamming the door. The walls were now a pale peach and the shelves had been put up. The calm colour didn’t help the situation much.

“I tried,” Sam defended. “But I just couldn’t get the words to come out.”

Tonks sighed and peered at him. He looked awful, more ill than Remus, and that was saying something. All the time she had known him, she had felt this strange pull in her gut. She had even gone to her own healer to try and find out what it was. Her healer had been unable to explain it, but now it was all so clear.

Tonks had to admit, she was attracted to him in a way she had never been to anyone else. It was almost primal, the instinct she had to touch him. It was distracting. She hadn’t been able to function properly since the day she met him.

“You’re going to answer some questions for me, and you’re going to answer honestly,” she ordered and he nodded immediately.

She wasn’t really sure where to start, what she wanted to know first. Solarin had done a pretty thorough job of explaining what was happening, but there were certain things she needed to know before she was calm enough to assess how she actually felt about him.

“This pull I feel, is it meant to happen?” she asked.

“Yes. It’s meant to show you the path to take, to show you that you’re meant to be with me,” he replied immediately.

Sam was no fool, though he had done an excellent imitation of one recently. This was an Auror trained by Mad-Eye Moody himself, and he was under no illusions. She would probe his mind to get her answers if she had to.

“And this bond we’ve got. Sol told you not to start forming it, so did Bill. Why did you?”

He gulped. That was the one question he didn’t want to answer. “I couldn’t stop myself. Tonks, I am fourty five. I’ve been a werewolf for thirty three years, and not once did I ever consider that I would find my mate. And then I did,” he admitted. “I knew it was wrong, I knew I shouldn’t do it, but I couldn’t stop. Don’t you get it? To me, you are the most precious thing in the world.”

She didn’t want to give in to those pleading honey eyes, but her resolve was slipping. No man had ever affected her like this. She could feel it, this bond he had formed. Even if she didn’t want to admit it, she knew he was right. He was hers, he was the one she was made for.

“What does it mean for me to be your mate?”

“I will never love anyone but you, and I will never let anyone touch me but you. If we have sex, I will have bound myself to you for the rest of my life. I’ll always be there, my wolf instincts see you as the most precious thing in the world, something that I have to protect,” Sam said quietly. “If we do mate, the bond will become solid. We’ll be together forever.”

“What if we break up? Stop loving each other?” 

“That won’t happen. Werewolves mate for life. Once we mate, we will be bound together. We’ll be together forever, we’ll never want anyone but each other.” He sighed. “I am so sorry. I shouldn’t have done this, I should have walked away,” he whispered.

Sam hugged himself and walked to the window, staring out into the street below. He suddenly wished for the days when it had all been simple, when he had been small enough to believe his father could right any wrong, make it all better. Those days had been much more uncomplicated. Damn it, he was a submissive omega, he wasn’t supposed to go all dominant over his mate. But that was the thing about mates, it was never as simple as it should be.

Tonks watched his slim toned shirt covered back shake and she knew he was crying. Did she really mean that much to him? She hadn’t believed Solarin when she had told her how right they were for each other, but now she did. And then it hit her that he had never meant to get this deep, that he was in over his head. He was drowning in this bond, and she knew with full certainty that if she did reject this, even at this early stage in the bond, Sam would die from it. The thought made her feel sick. No, that wasn’t what fate had in store for this man. 

Sam jumped at the feel of a hand on his shoulder. Tonks tried to turn him around but he resisted. He didn’t want her to see his tears.

“I am so sorry. I never should have done this, dragged you into it all. This isn’t fair on you, I should have listened. I am so sorry,” he whispered.

Sam wasn’t quite sure how it happened, how she had done it, but he was suddenly flat on his back, pinned to the floor by one smiling witch.

“You really don’t get it, do you?” she said. “The bond takes two. In my training, we studied werewolves. I know how you form a bond like this, and I know that it takes two. You didn’t do this on your own, you couldn’t.”

Her words made sense, but still they weren’t quite getting through to his brain. “I don’t understand,” he said cautiously and she giggled.

“Sam, we both formed it. We only got this far because we were both idiots,” she said. “If we had just talked instead of avoiding the issue, you wouldn’t have gotten so sick. So, now you’re going to listen to me.”

He nodded mutely, too afraid to speak.

“You, Healer Samuel Jones, are mine, do you hear me? You are mine and I am yours. I am your mate, and I love you. I should have figured it out weeks ago, but I was in denial. I didn’t want to admit that I had feelings this strong, that I may have found the one I want to settle down with. I love you, Sam,” she said firmly. “So, are you going to kiss me now or what?”

He laughed and used his werewolf strength to free his hands, reaching up to gently thread his fingers through her hair. “What do you really look like?” he asked and then he watched as she showed him.

Her hair was naturally a long straight dark brown, and she had the same blue eyes as Sirius. Her real nose was a cute button nose, and her mouth was full and just begging to be kissed. Merlin, she was beautiful. And she was his.

Sam pulled her down so her lips were mere millimetres from hers and then stopped. “I’m sorry for what happened in the kitchen,” he whispered.

She smiled. “You’re forgiven,” she murmured before she closed the distance, capturing his lips with hers.

It was so simple, so easy. Tonks and Sam were mates, together forever.

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Sirius took Severus to one side before lunch and tried desperately not to blush. He couldn’t quite get what he needed to say to form actual words.

“Is there something you wanted?” Severus asked quietly when it seemed as if Sirius was not going to talk anytime soon. It could be anything. Remus had only just taken the sterilisation potion.

The side affects of that particular potion had been known to be difficult to handle. They included vomiting, stomach cramps, and a feeling of being kicked in the balls. Remus looked particularly sore, so Severus was expecting a request for a pain potion.

“Yes, there is. Well, I was wondering if you could take everyone out on the first of October. Maybe you could take Harry to spend his voucher at Florean Fortescues, make a real family outing of it,” Sirius said lightly.

Severus was confused. The first of October was only a week away. The logistics of it all were easy enough to work out, but why was Sirius asking such a thing? Had the man forgotten how reluctant Severus was to let Harry out of the sanctuary of the house? And why on the first?

“Sirius, why do you want everyone out of the house on that specific day?” Severus asked suspiciously.

Sirius shifted uncomfortably and took a deep breath. “On the first, me and Remus will have the all clear to resume a physical relationship,” he said diplomatically. “I’m still technically the alpha, he’s going to reassert himself. It would be best if no one were here to get in his way.”

Ah, Severus understood now. Remus reasserting himself could get…aggressive, to say the least. People had been known to end up in comas getting in the way of a werewolf trying to reassert their pack position. He smirked.

“Are you sure you can handle him? You are, after all, not as young as you were last time,” Severus queried.

Sirius chuckled. “I’m not that old,” he joked. “I can handle it. I’d just prefer it if my children were not in harms way from their papa.”

Severus smiled. “Very well, I shall take them all out for the day, on one condition. You persuade Mad-Eye and Tonks to accompany us. I will not have my husband or daughter put at risk.”

“Do you really think Sol isn’t enough of a match for Lucius?”

Severus sniggered. “Of course she is. All the same, it may seem a little overboard, but I would rather there be Aurors with us. I will not take any chances with my family’s safety. I refuse to let Lucius take Harry from me.”

Sirius stared at the man for a moment before he nodded. It kept catching him off guard when Severus got possessive over his godson. It was easy to forget just how possessive Severus could get when the man was usually calm and collected. “I’ll talk to them. I wouldn’t ask you for this if I didn’t have to. But Remus, when he gets like this, he’s not himself,” Sirius said.

Severus held up his hand. “You need not explain. I have done my reading, I know what will happen. All I can say is that I will prepare healing draughts for you, and that I wish you the very best of luck. Oh, and I will patch you up afterwards, should you need it.”

With that, Severus swept back to preparing vegetables, leaving a blushing Sirius staring open mouthed at his back.

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The first of October dawned bright and early, and Severus was thankful for the clear blue sky. It would not be good if they got rained on. 

Harry was practically bouncing in his excitement. It had been months since he had left the house, and he was looking forward to the trip. His excitement, however, could not cover his nerves. Miri was, after all, no longer his bump. 

“Severus, are you sure about this?” Harry questioned as they packed Miri’s baby bag.

“Absolutely. Are you all right, love? You do want to go, don’t you?”

“Of course I want to. I’m just nervous. This is the first time we’ve taken Miri out. I just want to be sure it’s all going to go okay,” Harry said as he swung the bag onto his shoulder.

Severus pulled him into a swift hug, and then swooped in for a kiss. “Everything will be fine, love, I promise. I would not be letting this trip happen if I had any doubt over the safety of my beautiful husband and daughter.”

Harry grinned and stole another kiss before he plucked Miri from her crib. Severus waved him to the stairs as he stopped on the third floor. As Harry moved out of sight, Severus crept to Remus and Sirius’ door. He quietly cracked open the door and peeked inside.

Sirius was awake and he eased himself from the bed, careful not to wake his husband. Remus’ werewolf senses had gone on a kind of holiday since the miscarriage, and he had been sleeping like the dead. 

Sirius made his way downstairs to see them all off, and Severus assured him that they would not return until dinner, at six that evening. Which gave Sirius nine hours.

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Harry couldn’t help it, he kept glancing around for long white blond hair.

The crowds were thin today, probably because of it being a Monday. So many witches and wizards were at work, and the younger crowds were absent. Harry and Phoenix were a rarity, Hogwarts aged teens out of school. The Leaky Cauldron had practically been empty.

Severus had convinced almost all members of their family to tag along, the ones who didn’t have to be at work. Arthur, Bill, Jack and Sam had been forced to go into their respective offices, Anne had needed to go and run some errands. They had wanted to come along, but other duties had kept them from it.

Molly had the twins in a double stroller, and she and Charlie kept taking it in turns to push it. Phoenix, Solarin and Tonks made up a weird girly section, one which frequently erupted in giggles. Mad-Eye Moody and Kingsley Shacklebolt, who had both been asked along to set Severus’ mind at ease, kept to the outsides of the group, keeping a close eye on the family.

Harry was pushing Miri in her pram, Severus by his side. Harry hadn’t realised just how anxious he would be, taking Miri out of the house. He was pretty sure he was about to fall into a panic attack and they hadn’t even opened the archway yet. All they had done was travel to The Leaky Cauldron and walk through it.

Severus could see how anxious Harry was, they could all see it. He wasn’t surprised, he had always known that Miri’s first trip out in the world would be difficult for Harry.

Severus pulled Harry into his arms, feeling the sprite cling to him. “It’s okay, love. I’m right here,” he murmured.

Harry took a few deep breaths and forced himself to relax. It was all okay, nothing bad would happen. Severus was with him, he was surrounded by family and friends and Aurors. Besides, Solarin was more than a match for Lucius and she was right there, holding onto Miri’s pram while Severus calmed him down.

“I know, I’m just having a wobbly moment,” Harry whispered.

“All right, love, take your time. There’s no rush, take all the time you need,” Severus said gently, stroking his hair.

“Don’t move.”

“Not going anywhere.”

They stood there for the next ten minutes, the family talking amongst themselves, before Harry was ready to actually go into Diagon Alley. As Charlie moved forwards to open the arch, Solarin leaned in close to Harry.

“I was trained by Moody, I know what I’m looking for. You just concentrate on having a good time, let me worry about the rest,” she murmured. “Don’t forget, Lucius knows I’m going to put him in St Mungo’s if he comes anywhere near you or Miri.”

Harry had forgotten that. Suddenly remembering what had happened in Enchantment helped immensely, and Harry gave his first voluntary smile since they had left the house.

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	7. Chapter 7

Remus drifted into waking to find himself alone in bed. He sat up and looked around, noticing an envelope lying on Sirius’ pillow.

My sweet wolf,

Guess what day it is today? It is October 1st and we have the all clear. Now, I promised you that when Sam said we could, I would play all the games you wanted. Well, I thought we would begin with a game I want.   
You said the first thing you wanted was for me to suck you off. If you want it, you have to find me first.   
The house is empty, Severus has taken everyone to Diagon Alley and they won’t be back until six. I’m hiding somewhere in the house. 

Come and find me if you want to play.

Sirius.

Remus smiled and slipped from the bed. It would be simple, he would just scent him out. That plan was shot to hell when he opened the bedroom door. The whole house smelled of Sirius, and as Remus explored further, he found that Sirius had left an item of clothing in each of the rooms.

“Sirius?” he called over the banister.

“Ah, you’re awake,” came the echoing reply. It echoed through the whole house, so Remus had no chance of finding him using sound. Damn it, Sirius had given this too much thought.

“Where are you?” Remus called.

“Do you want to play?”

Remus grinned. “Yes.”

“Then you’ll have to find me.”

“At least give me a hint,” Remus bargained.

A moment of silence. “Nope. You’re the werewolf, use your instincts.”

With that, Sirius fell silent and Remus growled. He started searching at the top, in the attic, and slowly made his way downstairs. It wasn’t until he reached the ground floor did Sirius speak again.

“Warmer, much warmer.”

Remus stood absolutely still, waiting for some kind of sign. He moved to the kitchen door.

“Colder.”

The dining room door. “Cold.”

The door that led to the basement. “Getting warmer.”

Remus slowly descended the stairs, the scent of his husband getting stronger as he went. “Am I warm now?” Remus called out.

“Getting rather toasty,” came Sirius’ reply.

Remus found himself in one of the empty basement rooms and immediately knew he was in the right place. The whole room was covered in a cushioning charm. The floor, the walls, and he suspected the ceiling too, all of it was soft and squishy to the touch. Ah, Sirius had thought ahead, to when he was caught.

“How am I doing?” Remus asked.

“Hot, hot, hot.”

Remus could smell him, hear him, practically feel the heat radiating off him, but he couldn’t see him. “You’re under a Disillusionment Charm, aren’t you?” Remus asked suspiciously, and was answered by a guilty chuckle. “Ah, well, if you want to play it that way…” Remus wandlessly locked the door and he swore he heard Sirius gulp. “So, what shall I do with you once I’ve found you?” Remus called. “I do have a few ideas. Would you like to hear them?”

“Yes.”

Remus smiled, standing in the middle of the room, slowly turning on the spot. He was just waiting for some kind of sign. “Well, first, I would taste every inch of you, mark you as mine. Reclaim my territory. You like it when I do that, don’t you?” he said innocently, and a wave of heat hit him. “Ah, yes you do. Next, I would run my fingers over your skin. Slowly, oh so slowly. Your shoulders, your wrists, nowhere too sensitive at first. No, best to start slow. Then I would move on to more interesting areas. Your nipples. Your hips. Your dick.”

Sirius gasped at all the things Remus was saying. Oh, this was just too much fun. He hadn’t been this inventive when he was sixteen, last time hadn’t been this entertaining. He was harder than he thought humanly possible, and every word Remus said caused his mind to conjure up images to go with them. He could just imagine the way Remus would pin him to the floor, the way he would touch him. It almost made him want to give in. Almost.

“Then, just as you would start to beg, I’d flip you over onto all fours, and rim you until you screamed,” Remus continued and Sirius moaned. Remus hardly ever did that to him, he reserved it for moments like this, when he needed to prove how much control he had over Sirius. “After that, I’d show you just who is alpha.”

Without warning, Sirius found himself pinned to the wall, one very excited werewolf smiling at him. Sirius felt himself become visible once more and grinned at his lover. 

“Oh, look, you found me,” Sirius breathed before leaning in for the last dominating kiss he would get. It didn’t last very long, as Remus noticed after only a few seconds that Sirius was nude and sporting a fierce hard-on.

“You promised,” Remus growled, releasing his wrists.

“That I did,” Sirius agreed, dropping to his knees.

There would be little love in the act, Remus was too close to feral for that. No, this was purely about Remus reasserting himself as alpha, and Sirius knew he would be very very sore by the time Remus was finished.

Sirius yanked down Remus’ pyjama bottoms and swallowed him whole, Remus crying out and bracing himself against the wall. Sirius had to remember to breathe through his nose as Remus roughly fucked his mouth, thrusting his way down his throat. Sirius would never admit it to anyone, and no one would believe him if he did, but he loved it when Remus was like this, when Remus took him rough and hard and fast. Something about the violence of it, the pure need, turned Sirius on.

All too soon, Remus reached his release and screamed as he came hard, Sirius swallowing every last drop. Sirius had barely finished swallowing when Remus pulled himself from his mouth and flipped him onto his back. Sirius’ hands were pushed above his head and secured there with a silent wandless spell. Oh, that could not be good. Sirius logically knew it could not be good, but it was turning him on too much for him to really care if it was good or not. It was hot, that was all he cared about at that point.

“Say it,” Remus demanded.

“You’re the alpha, I was just filling in while you were ill,” Sirius replied immediately, Remus rewarding him with a hard fiery kiss.

“Again,” growled Remus.

“You’re the alpha.”

Remus sighed in relief and proceeded to taste every inch of him, just as he promised. Remus sucked hard every now and then, leaving small red marks all over Sirius’ pale skin, marking him, but he didn’t bite. Sirius wriggled at the feel of those soft lips sliding over his heated flesh, that silky tongue tasting him. When Remus was done tasting him, his hands started to move, sliding over Sirius’ flesh, making him moan and gasp.

Remus smirked as Sirius moaned and leaned in for a kiss. It wouldn’t be too long now before he started to beg. That was what Remus wanted, Sirius begging his alpha for release. The last time they had been like this, they had had the whole Shrieking Shack to themselves for a day, but Sirius hadn’t made the chase as fun that time. He wasn’t this imaginative when he was sixteen. But no, now was a whole different story. It had been very enticing to have to find his lover, and Remus planned to thank him thoroughly for the chase. If only Sirius would beg.

“Ah! Merlin! Remus, please! Please!” Sirius pleaded as Remus stroked his member, his touch so light, that wonderful mouth sucking at his throat.

There it was, Sirius begging. Remus released the magic on his hands and flipped him over, ordering him to get on all fours. Sirius quickly obeyed. Now was not the time to be rebellious. Although the experience of being thoroughly dominated by his lover was incredibly arousing, Sirius wasn’t sure just how far gone Remus was, which made it a very dangerous situation for him. He knew Remus would stop if he was in real danger, but Sirius wasn’t certain on what Remus’ wolf saw as real danger. 

“Remus?” he called apprehensively.

Remus froze. Something was wrong, this was not a game anymore. Something was wrong with his mate. The wolf began to recede a little, just enough for the human to take control momentarily.

“What is it, sweetheart? What’s wrong?” Remus asked, lying down on his side, Sirius doing the same, so they lay facing each other.

Sirius took a deep breath. “I know you will stop if I’m in trouble, but what does the wolf think is real trouble?” he questioned.

“If you stop breathing, obviously, and things like that. The wolf will stop for those,” Remus reasoned, stroking his side. “If you try to pull away, if you try and stop me in a panic, I will stop. The wolf sees you as precious, something to be protected. Even with the wolf in control, I won’t violate you.”

Sirius smiled. “I was just checking,” he admitted. “I’m rather enjoying this but I just wanted to be sure your wolf wasn’t going to fuck me to death or anything.”

Remus laughed. “It’s okay. I don’t blame you, the wolf can be a little harsh. Just remember, if you want to stop, just let yourself panic. I’ll smell the change in you and stop. Are you all right now?”

Sirius nodded and Remus granted him a sweet kiss before Sirius got back on his hands and knees and the wolf took over once more.

Sirius gasped at the feel of Remus’ warm wet tongue toying with his arse, those soft fingers opening him to the sinful feel of that slick muscle thrusting inside him, and he pushed back against it, desperate for more. It was incredible, the feel of Remus feasting on him. He knew why Remus saved it for those special occasions, it was just too good to be used all the time. It made Sirius fall apart, and Remus knew it. Oh Merlin, Sirius tried not to, and he didn’t want to, but it was just too good, he couldn’t help it.

Sirius screamed, and Remus stopped. 

There was a moment of absolute stillness when Sirius caught his breath a little, and then Remus thrust inside him. No warning, no preparation, nothing. Remus buried to the hilt in one quick lunge. Remus had taken the time to cover himself in lube, which Sirius was thankful for. It definitely would not have been good without lube. Sirius would like to walk sometime this year, thank you very much. A moment to adjust and then Remus started to thrust. He set the pace, which was hard and fast, and he thrust so violently that Sirius felt like he was about to be split open, and he was going to like it.

Sirius gasped and moaned, there wasn’t much else he could do. He was so close to the edge that one little thing would push him over. Remus was gripping his hips and he hissed as nails embedded themselves, drawing blood. Sirius even enjoyed the pain of the bleeding wounds.

It went on, Remus pounding into him, and Sirius wondered how long it could go on before Remus came. His memories of the last time were a little hazy at this point, he couldn’t actually remember it at all, not with Remus slamming into him. The nails that had drawn blood from his hips moved to scrape down his back, opening up long deep gashes. Sirius groaned, the pain mutating into pleasure, and he was so very nearly there, until the feel of teeth grazing his neck brought him crashing back to earth.

“No,” he forced out, but Remus didn’t seem to hear him. 

Oh no, not good. Remus was very far gone now, too far gone. Human Remus never bit, but Remus’ human side wasn’t exactly in complete control. Sirius let himself panic, the fear of being bitten taking him over momentarily, and Remus fell still. It wasn’t that Sirius really feared being bitten. He actually wished Remus could bite him. It was the devastation Remus would feel if he infected him that scared Sirius.

“What’s wrong?” Remus gasped, caressing his shoulders. “Sirius, baby, are you all right?”

“No biting,” Sirius demanded. “Don’t bite me, Remus, I mean it.”

“Was I trying to?” Remus sounded shocked.

“I felt teeth. I wasn’t sure if you were going to bite me or not, but I had to stop you. No teeth, it makes me nervous. Don’t bite me, Remus.”

A moment of still silence and then kisses were littered along his spine. “I won’t, I promise. I swear, Siri, I would never do that to you, never.”

“I know, I just had to remind the wolf that human you is really the one in control here. He was getting a bit too big for his boots,” Sirius joked and Remus sniggered. Sirius turned his head and Remus caught his lips in a kiss he could almost call sweet.

“All right, sweetheart. You’re okay, though? I haven’t hurt you?”

“Not in a bad way.”

Remus grinned. “Good to know I can still get you all worked up. You okay to carry on?”

Sirius nodded and let himself relax, sinking down onto his forearms. The pounding began again, as did the scratching, but no more attempts to bite him. Instead, there were kisses and licks, caresses and strokes, and one instance of a nuzzle to Sirius’ neck, but no more teeth. Finally, Remus reached around and stroked him, hard and fast like his thrusts, and Sirius came so hard he blacked out for a few moments.

When Sirius came to, Remus was just finishing licking him clean. Sirius was on his back, an experience which wasn’t all too nice as he was scratched to pieces, and Remus was hard again.

“Remus?” he questioned.

Remus didn’t answer him immediately. Instead, he crawled on top of him, settling between his thighs, kissing him hard.

“Time for round two,” Remus murmured before he thrust back inside his mate.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Harry couldn’t stop smiling. He had had such a brilliant day, and there hadn’t been the slightest hint of one white blond bastard. He was still a little on edge, but that would fade as he spent time in the sanctuary of Grimmauld Place.

The family had made their way slowly down the street, popping into this shop and that, and Miri had come away with more than just her first taste of ice cream. Fred and George had insisted on giving the little augur a Pygmy Puff, a bright pink one Miri called Smoo. Fred had assured the reluctant Seeker that Smoo had no teeth, no legs, and was basically a ball of fluff that hummed when happy. It was really the perfect first pet for Miri. It loved to be held, which suited Miri just fine. She had cuddled it constantly since George had handed it to her.

Fred and George had offered one each to Catherine and Joseph, but the baby twins had disliked the feel of the Pygmy Puffs intensely, screaming their displeasure. Fred and George had decided that maybe the twins would like some Pygmy Puffs when they were a little older.

The family had spent more than two hours with the elder Weasley twins, and Severus had laughed when he discovered it was Harry that had bankrolled the business. Then the twins had accompanied them to Florean Fortescues, where Florean had been delighted to have so many customers at once. Harry had thoroughly enjoyed his chocolate orange sundae, and Miri had enjoyed her tastes of it too. 

It had been a really fun day out, which was capped off by Solarin assigning Fred and George Enchantment, signing it over to them on the condition they did not change the name. The two redheads had grinned from ear to ear.

There had been the hordes of fans wanting to see Harry Potter’s baby, but one Scary Professor Snape glare had them keeping their distance. Every time some witch or wizard overstepped their bounds and got too close, Severus scared them away and earned himself a megawatt smile from Harry.

“Did you enjoy yourself, love?” Severus asked as they hoisted Miri’s pram up the front steps.

“You know, I really did. Not that I want to go on outings every day or anything, but I really enjoyed myself,” Harry agreed, smiling as Miri waved Smoo at him. “Did the twins say what these things eat?”

“They did include a booklet,” Severus said, removing the shopping bags from the pram before Harry lifted Miri from it. It would not be good if she went flying. 

“Thank Merlin for that. I think Miri might never forget it if Smoo starved to death.”

“Would you care to translate the name?” Severus requested and Harry looked thoughtfully at the ball of pink fluff humming in their daughters hands.

“I think she was trying to say smooch, as in kiss. Sol told us that love is represented by pink to her, Miri probably sees the same. I think she’s going by the colour,” he theorised. “I could be wrong, though.”

Severus smirked and helped Molly unpack the shopping bags before Harry’s exclamation made him turn around.

“Sirius, I felt for sure you’d be out partying with Remus or something,” Harry said as his godfather appeared in the doorway.

“No, me and Remus had a…quiet day at home,” Sirius said, giving Severus a meaningful look. “We just spent some time together getting back on track.”

Severus took the hint and excused himself, claiming to need to add some ingredients to some potions before they were ruined. He made his way down to his lab and waited. It was only a few minutes before there was knock at the door.

The Sirius that entered was not the calm cheerful one from upstairs. This Sirius moved very slowly, winced with every step and had eyes that watered.

“I wouldn’t come to you for this usually,” Sirius said through clenched teeth. “But you understand what’s happened and I’m in agony. You were right, I’m not as young as I was last time.”

“I did offer. Please, remove your shirt, I will begin with your back,” Severus said, grabbing the first aid kit he had hidden in his lab the night before. “Sweet Merlin, he really got violent, didn’t he? Here, drink it all.”

Sirius dutifully gulped down the potion Severus gave him and sighed as the pain in his backside subsided somewhat. “It got a little rough. Do me a favour and check that he didn’t bite me. He said he wouldn’t, and I don’t remember being bitten, but I can’t really be sure at this point. It’s not like I can get a clear view of my back.”

Severus looked over all the scratches, gouges, bruises and other marks on the Animagus’ back, neck and shoulders before he proclaimed there were no bite marks, thank God. Remus would never forgive himself if he had bitten Sirius in a moment of passion.

“Where is he?” Severus asked as he began to clean the deepest of the wounds with antiseptic potion, Sirius hissing.

“Asleep for now. It seems to have run its course, thank Merlin. Did you all have a good day out?” Sirius gritted out.

“We did. Harry had a little wobbly moment at the beginning, but he enjoyed himself in the end. Miri was given a Pygmy Puff by the twins. She has called it Smoo.” He paused, waiting until Sirius had stopped chuckling before he asked his next question. “Are you bleeding down below?” he asked delicately.

“No, not from there. I managed to survive without that particular injury,” Sirius joked. No, he was not bleeding, though it was bloody painful. “Remus remained human enough to remember lubricant, thank Merlin. Any other potions I should take?”

“Yes, take this one,” Severus said, handing him a pink one. “The first was the initial painkiller, this is the rest of it. You should be able to sit down by the time I am finished.”

“Good man,” Sirius breathed as it took effect. 

Severus carefully cleaned the wounds on his father-in-laws back, trying to spare the man any unnecessary pain. There was one wound on the base of his spine that looked like Remus had tried to rip the flesh off the bone. “I assume you want the markings left intact?” he questioned and Sirius nodded. “Very well. I don’t think Remus would like it if his markings disappeared. I will put a dressing on your back shortly, so you can wear a shirt without too much discomfort. I doubt you want your children to see these. Anything else?”

Sirius turned around and Severus grimaced. Right there, on Sirius’ chest just above his heart, were four particularly deep scratch marks. “Wait,” Sirius said as Severus moved to touch them. “Not those ones yet. I need you to look at some wounds on my hips first.”

“Very well,” Severus said and he was impressed that Sirius managed to show him the wounds and cover himself. “These are minor. They will not scar, but I will clean and dress them to prevent infection. I doubt any of them will scar, apart from the one on your lower back and those on your chest. You will, however, be very bruised. I recommend a healing bath.”

“Thank you,” Sirius said, and the two of them froze as someone knocked on the door.

“Who is it?” Severus called.

“It’s Solarin, I need some dittany. Kitty went nuts again.”

Severus looked to the Animagus for permission of Solarin joining them and Sirius considered it. Remus had told him that the witch could keep a secret, and Sirius did trust her. So he nodded and Severus called for her to enter.

“That owl has to go. I love her and all, but she’s getting too dangerous to be around anyone, let alone three small babies,” Solarin said, letting Severus deal with the bleeding scratches on her arm. She peered at Sirius. “Sweet Merlin, look at you. I’m guessing Remus is alpha again.”

“Yes, and I don’t recommend taking him on again. I don’t think I could survive another one,” Sirius said as Severus treated Solarin’s arm. The witch didn’t even blink and Sirius was highly impressed, until she shifted and he caught sight of her Brand. He silently reminded himself that this was a woman who could handle a hell of a lot of pain.

“Noted. Oh, let me at it, you can’t stitch to save your life,” she said as Severus moved away. She grabbed a suture kit and forced Sirius to stay still as she stitched the scratches on his chest, spraying some antibacterial solution onto it before she secured a dressing.

“You are very good at that,” Sirius said, marvelling at how neat the stitches were, how fast she had been.

“I interned with Sam for a summer when I was younger. He taught me how to stitch wounds, take blood, that kind of thing. Speaking of Sam, you should see the hickey,” she said with a smile as Severus started to apply the dressing to Sirius’ back.

“What hickey?” Severus asked.

“The one Tonks left on his neck. I swear, it’s the size of an apple,” she said with a grin, making Severus snigger.

“Wait, let me get this straight,” Sirius said. “Tonks accepted the bond?”

“Yup. The two of them are all love-shaped. It’s kind of nauseating, actually,” Solarin confirmed, helping Severus secure the bandage. “Oh, and Remus is awake. He’s happily cuddling Miri.”

Sirius paled. “You couldn’t have mentioned that before?” he said trying to move to the door but he was stopped by Severus.

“Drink these and you can go,” he said, handing him three vials of the pink painkilling potion. Sirius dutifully gulped them down before shrugging on his shirt and moving upstairs.

Remus was indeed cuddling Miri, who was babbling to him about Smoo. Remus smiled as Sirius entered with the Snape siblings and then blushed at the bandage peaking out from under his shirt collar. He handed Miri to Harry and made his way over.

“Are you all right, sweetheart?” he murmured and Sirius smiled shakily.

“Fine, just a little sore. I had to get the Snape’s to patch me up,” Sirius admitted. “Are you okay with that?”

Remus sniggered. “Absolutely,” he said. “At least we know Severus and Solarin will keep their mouths shut.” Remus hesitated, looking worried. “I…ummm…I didn’t bite you, did I?”

Sirius swooped in for a swift kiss. “No, honey, you didn’t. I had Severus check for me. No bites, but lots and lots of scratching. You really wanted to mark me, huh?”

Remus nodded. “You’re my territory, I had to stake my claim,” he joked. “Speaking of marking, Severus didn’t remove them, did he?”

“No, just made sure no infections would happen. He recommends a healing bath. Remus, we may need to give it a few days…or weeks, before we can mate again,” he said gently. “I’m lucky I can walk and sit down, lets not push it.” Remus blushed and nodded, Sirius giving him another sweet kiss. “All right, you can go back to Miri cuddles now. I know you want to, and I’m fine, so go on.”

Remus practically bounced away, and Harry happily handed Miri over, the teen giving Sirius a sly smile that told him Harry knew exactly what had gone on while he was out. Sirius gingerly sat down at the table and avoided everyone’s eyes. 

Harry kept his mouth shut and moved to help Molly chop vegetables for dinner. He dutifully sliced carrots and broccoli while keeping an ear on the conversation and an eye on his baby. He was still a little on edge from the trip out and wasn’t ready to let her out of his sight, something Remus had fully agreed to when Harry had specified it to him.

“Did you all have a good time?” Remus asked, toying with Miri’s curls as he walked her around the kitchen.

“It was brilliant. We had ice cream, and hamburgers for lunch, and Fred and George showed us all their cool stuff,” Phoenix confirmed. She had her own lilac Pygmy Puff, and she happily waved it at Sirius. “Look, dad, look what Charlie got me.”

“Very pretty. Does it have a name?” the Animagus enquired, accepting a cup of tea from Charlie.

“Not yet. I’m sure she’ll think of one,” Charlie said.

“What do they eat?” Remus said as he caught Smoo, who had tumbled out of Miri’s hands. 

“No idea,” Severus said as he put the last of the shopping away. “Fred did give us a booklet, but we seem to have misplaced it. No matter, the twins said they would pop in for dinner. Are you comfortable with that, Sam?”

The healer looked up guiltily. “It’s fine, so long as they don’t touch my mate,” he said delicately and they all smirked. “Just to be clear, who’s my alpha now?”

Remus blushed the brightest shade of red and Sirius choked on his sip of tea. Tonks sniggered and stroked Sam’s hair, making Harry gape in amazement as Sam practically purred.

“Remus is the alpha,” Solarin said calmly. “Are you staying for dinner, Sam?”

“If there’s enough to go round. Dad said he might stop in to eat too. I think he needs a fix of Anne,” Sam confirmed and Remus shuddered. 

“I don’t need to hear that about my mother,” the werewolf said, making Sam chuckle.

“I was referring to her company,” he said. “But if your gutter mind takes it there…”

“Shut it.”

“Not my fault if you’ve got S-E-X on the brain, you’re the one who spent the day doing it,” Sam continued. 

They had all fallen into the habit of spelling out words they didn’t want Miri learning yet, though she picked up on the embarrassment from Sirius and Remus and started to giggle.

“Remus, do you mind if I murder your kind of stepbrother?” Sirius asked, glaring daggers at Sam.

“No, but I think Jack might get upset. He seems rather attached to his son, though I can’t work out why.”

“Must be my irresistible charm,” Sam offered.

“Must be your cheeky tongue,” Severus interjected, handing Remus a baby bottle of water for Miri.

“Or that annoying habit you have of breathing,” Remus suggested.

“Might be his wandering eye,” Sirius said.

“Or his terrible taste in clothes,” Solarin proposed, squinting at the luminous green of Sam’s shirt.

“Hey! No ganging up on me,” Sam said, trying to look offended, but his grin won through. He couldn’t help it, his mouth was just made for them. “And my wandering eye has been amputated, thank you very much.”

“That cheeky mouth of yours is more than a match for everyone in this room,” Charlie said.

“Dora, they’re ganging up on me,” Sam complained and Tonks held up her hands, shaking her head.

“No way, you started it, you’re on your own,” she said, moving away from him with her own smile. 

“No fair,” Sam said, pouting. “Please?”

“Nope. You dug yourself into this hole, you dig yourself out,” she said as she helped Harry chop potatoes.

Solarin giggled. “I guess we know who the alpha in that relationship is,” she said, making everyone laugh at Sam’s guilty blush.

The conversation continued quite pleasantly, most of the family ganging up on Sam, who was indeed more than a match for all of them. Anne arrived home from her errands and a whole new round of teasing went on, most of it aimed at Sam once more. Jack, Bill and Arthur arrived within moments of each other, and they all smelled faintly of mead, confirming their women’s suspicions of a quick after work drink. The twins arrived and nervously eyed Sam, who smiled and told them he was fine so long as they didn’t touch Tonks, which they agreed to immediately. 

Dinner was a quiet affair, mostly. Remus wanted to be the one to feed Miri, but Harry had tactfully told him that Miri wouldn’t let anyone but him do it. Something about Miri being breastfed secured it firmly in her mind that her carrier was the one with food. Remus agreed and Molly let him feed one of the twins, who were just starting to be weaned. Fred informed them that the Pygmy Puffs would eat anything given to them, which put Harry’s mind at ease.

Late that night, after he had put Miri into her crib and Smoo in his cage, Harry slid into bed and curled up in Severus’ arms.

“Severus?”

“Yes, love?”

“Why does Professor Slughorn keep talking about my mother?” Harry asked, referring to the Saturday just gone when he had spent two hours alone with the teacher.

Harry had produced Amortentia, something Severus had painstakingly taught him to brew, for Slughorn’s assessment on how he was progressing in Potions. Harry had to admit, having a Potions Master for a husband had certainly helped his marks in the subject go way up. While Harry brewed, Slughorn had kept on about how good his mother had been at Potions, how wonderful a woman she was. He had talked about her like she was an old friend, and it had pissed Harry off no end. 

“Well, Horace was my Head of House when I was a student at Hogwarts. He was one of Lily’s teachers, he taught Potions back then also. Lily was one of his favourites. He probably thinks he is being nice by bringing her up in conversation,” Severus surmised. “Why? Is there something wrong?”

“Yes,” Harry said, sitting up angrily. “I don’t like it, and I don’t like him. He’s a creep!”

Severus had never heard his husband talk of a teacher like this, not even himself in their earlier days. He had his suspicions that Harry had verbally abused him out of his earshot, but it was to be expected when Severus had been so venomous to him. 

Harry had seemed to get along with Horace Slughorn, or at least, Severus thought he had.

“You have to explain, Harry, I don’t understand,” Severus said, sitting up and rubbing his back.

It took Harry a few moments to calm down enough to speak. “He talks about her as if she was his friend, going on about how good she was in Potions, how wonderful she was, how much he enjoyed her company. He has no right to talk about her like that!” Harry fumed. “He was just her teacher, he wasn’t even her Head of House.”

“You don’t seem to mind when I talk of Lily,” Severus said cautiously.

“I don’t, because you were her friend. You actually spent time with her, you knew her, really knew her. You even trusted her enough to let her near Sol, and that’s saying something. Slughorn didn’t know her. He admitted it himself, he spent no time with her outside of class. He kept on about how she should have been in his club, and how she should have been in Slytherin. It just pisses me off,” Harry explained. 

“Is it this gushing about your mother that causes you to dislike him?”

“No, not just that,” Harry admitted, squirming. “The way he talks to me, it’s like he wants to collect me or something. It’s too much like Lucius, it freaks me out, and no matter how many hints I give him, he won’t stop.”

Ah, Severus could see the problem now. Slughorn did like to collect people, people who could further him in life, gifted wizards and witches who went on to work in high profile positions. Slughorn would obviously want the Chosen One for his collection. Severus felt he should have remembered his old teachers habit sooner, and stopped him from doing it.

“I will talk to him, Harry, I promise. I will stop him from doing these things. Would you prefer it if one of us were in the room with the two of you, to keep him under control? It cannot be me as I am teaching you Potions, but perhaps Remus, or Solarin?” Severus suggested.

Harry nodded and turned to look at his lover. “I’m sorry I got so worked up. It’s just…I don’t like feeling freaked out in my own home, not when our daughter is so close by,” he said quietly. He sighed. “Sometimes I wish I didn’t still have these lingering quirks.”

Severus kissed his scar. “I know, sweetheart. But I don’t mind them. They are just a part of you, and I love every single bit of you,” he said, making Harry smile.

“I love you too.”

Severus pulled him in for a kiss, which Harry enthusiastically responded to, and Severus stripped him of his pyjamas. Harry moaned as Severus nibbled at his neck, tangling his fingers in silky midnight tresses. 

Severus grinned as Harry pushed him onto his back, pulling off his pyjamas, straddling his hips.

“Mmmmmm, I love it when you’re forceful,” Severus hummed seductively.

Harry sniggered and attacked his nipples, making him gasp. Harry reached down and stroked him, making him moan. He moved lower and teased the tip of Severus’ member with his tongue, making him call out his name. Harry loved reducing Severus to a pile of mush. He knew that Severus was the one in real control of their relationship, and that suited him just fine, but every now and then he liked to take charge.

Severus gently stroked Harry’s hair, moaning. He was still coherent enough to restrain himself from trying to thrust into Harry’s mouth, and he marvelled at how good Harry made sex feel. It had never been this good with any of his other partners. 

Lucius had been all business, screwing Severus as fast as possible and leaving him sore and disappointed. Theresa Michaels had been much the same. Voldemort had just been cruel, delighting in causing Severus pain. Raul was possibly the best, sex with him was at least satisfying. 

But none of it could compare to joining with his sweet Harry. With Harry it was all about their pleasure, not one enjoying it more than the other. Severus enjoyed watching Harry’s pleasure as much as he did finding his own. And the feel of being inside Harry was like nothing he could ever describe. It just felt so…right, like it was always meant to be the two of them.

“Harry, please,” Severus moaned, making Harry pull away and grin at him.

“Please what?” the Gryffindor said innocently.

“Oh, you’re in one of those moods, are you?” Severus questioned and Harry nodded. “Very well. Harry, please let me take you.” 

To say Severus was shocked was an understatement. Harry lay down and pulled Severus on top of him, wrapping his legs around Severus’ waist. Harry had never let him take him in this position, not once. Lucius had always taken Harry in this position, Severus had assumed that he and Harry would never use it.

“Harry, what are you doing, love?” Severus asked cautiously, supporting his weight on his arms.

“I want to try it, see if I’m okay with it,” Harry said simply, toying with his hair.

“I see. And how do you feel about it?”

Harry considered it. He had expected to feel panicked, but he didn’t. No, in fact, he felt very safe with Severus on top of him. He didn’t feel restrained or forced. He felt safe, like nothing could get at him with Severus like this.

“I’m okay,” Harry whispered and Severus kissed him as he lowered himself a little more, still keeping most of his weight on his forearms.

“Still okay?”

Harry wriggled a little and then smiled. “Yes.”

Severus kissed him and grabbed the lube Harry had retrieved from the bedside cabinet. He leaned off to one side and coated himself before teasing Harry, making him gasp and moan with his tender strokes, his gentle fingers. 

“Are you sure, love?” Severus murmured as he settled himself between the pale thighs.

“Yes, I’m sure. Keep going, I’ll tell you if I’m not okay.”

Severus kissed him as he slowly guided himself into the tight passage, stopping when he was buried to the hilt. He kissed Harry as he waited, and then began to move as Harry wriggled his hips. Slowly at first, with tender gentle kisses, he waited for some sign that this was not what Harry wanted, that he was not okay with it anymore, but it didn’t come. Soon enough, Harry was moving to meet him, moaning his pleasure. 

Harry gasped at the feel of it, the new sensation of Severus controlling the thrusts. It had always been Harry who controlled them before, and this was a whole new experience. Oh Merlin, Severus was good at this. Harry felt pleasure build in him, different than usual, but no less satisfying. He was rather enjoying it, Severus on top. Harry decided that they would have to have a repeat of this one. He found himself digging his nails into Severus’ shoulders, scratching him as it got more intense.

Severus supported himself on one arm, his free hand moving down to caress Harry’s thigh, nipping and sucking at his neck. Harry gasped at that, and buried his face in his neck, kissing it as he moaned his enjoyment. Severus was so close, he could feel it. It would only take a few more thrusts and then he would lose himself.

All of a sudden, Severus felt Harry stiffen beneath him, tighten around him, warmth coating his stomach and Harry crying out his name as he climaxed. That was new. Harry had not used his little sentence of need. Severus didn’t get to dwell on it too much as Harry clamping down around him pulled his own orgasm from him, making him call out his lovers name in breathless whisper.

Severus managed not to collapse on his husband, finding himself instead with his face pressed to the pillow. Severus rolled them so they were on their sides, still entwined, still joined, and Severus found it hard to tell where he ended and Harry began.

Harry regained his senses a while later to find Severus watching him, smiling gently. He smiled back and pulled him in for a gentle kiss, duelling with his tongue.

“That was good, I liked that one,” Harry said simply, making Severus chuckle.

“So glad you approve. Does that mean you would like to use this position again?”

“Definitely. I thought I wouldn’t like it, but I did. I felt kind of…safe, like nothing could get at me with you protecting me. And I didn’t even need to use my sentence.”

Severus smirked at the self-satisfied tone. “I was wondering about that. Why didn’t you need to use it?”

Harry squirmed slightly, causing Severus to slip from him. “I didn’t need it because you were rubbing me the whole time,” he admitted shyly.

Severus understood now. In such a position, he would have been stimulating that part of his lover every time he thrust. No wonder Harry had enjoyed it so much. Severus kissed his lover and performed cleaning charms on both of them and the sheets before turning off the light and cuddling Harry to him.

“Love you,” Harry mumbled sleepily, snuggling further into his embrace.

“I love you,” Severus replied, kissing his neck.

Before long, the two of them knew nothing but dreams.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

On Saturday morning, while Harry was busy changing Miri upstairs, Severus took Horace Slughorn aside.

“Severus, m’boy, something I can help you with?” Horace said cheerfully.

“Yes, there is,” Severus replied. “I’m not sure how to say this without offending you, so I’m just going to say it. You are making Harry very uncomfortable.”

Horace was stunned. He had never done that to a student before. Well, he had never done it unintentionally. How had he done that?

“Harry did not wish to be rude, or speak out of turn so he asked me to have a word with you,” Severus continued.

“I’m sorry, Severus, but I can’t think what I could have done to upset him. I’m aware of his…shall we say, issues, but I wasn’t aware of doing anything to aggravate them,” Horace said.

Severus took a deep breath. “There are two things that are bothering Harry. The first is the reference to his mother. He would prefer not to talk of her with you. Harry is very specific about who he will and will not talk of his birth parents with. My apologies, but he does not wish to discuss Lily or James with you at all.”

Horace could fully appreciate that, Harry losing his parents so young would undoubtedly leave specific issues surrounding discussion of said parents.

“I understand and I will refrain from discussing Lily or James with him. What is the second problem?”

“You trying to collect him.”

Right, Horace was particularly confused now. No student had ever had a problem with that particular habit of his before. Most students had tried to get his attention, wanted to be collected. He honestly didn’t understand.

“I’m going to need a little explanation.”

“When Harry was held captive, Lucius used to talk of owning him, of being his master. Harry does not like the similarity between what happened and what you imply,” Severus said simply and Horace nodded.

“Of course, of course. Forgive me, I should have considered his experiences more closely. I apologise for any discomfort I caused. Is there anything I can do to make it up to him? Is there a way I can make it easier for him?”

“He would feel more at ease if there was a member of the family in the room with you,” Severus suggested and Horace agreed immediately. 

Potions assessments went very smoothly after that and Bill found his Saturday mornings to be very confusing.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Solarin looked up from her breakfast a week after Severus’ discussion with Horace Slughorn and suddenly she couldn’t breathe properly. There he was, the one from her dreams.

“Albus?” Severus questioned. “What’s going on?”

Albus smiled and gently urged the child further into the room, so they could all get a better look at him. He was a small child, tiny really, with bright blue eyes and dark messy hair. He looked curiously around at all of them as he clung to Albus’ robes.

“This is Dorian and he needs a new family. It occurred to me that you might all be willing to accept him into this family,” Albus said with a smile. “You do have a habit of taking in waifs and strays.”

They all chuckled. Remus was the first to say hello, crouching down to Dorian’s level, and Dorian hid his face against Albus’ leg. Remus smiled. “Perhaps Dorian would like to go and play with some of the toys upstairs?” He beckoned Phoenix over. “This is Nixie, my little girl. Would you like Nixie to play a game with you?” Remus said and Dorian nodded.

Once Phoenix had taken the little boy upstairs to the playroom, Albus sat down with the rest of the family.

“How old is he?” Solarin asked.

“He will turn three this coming December,” Albus replied.

“Where did he come from?” Molly asked.

Albus looked very grave. “Harry, did you know of your cousin Dudley having a relationship with a young girl called Sophia Martins?”

“No, but I can’t say that we talked about our love lives too much. We never talked full stop. Wait, Sophia.” Harry looked thoughtful for a moment. “There was a girl called Sophia that went to my primary school. She used to hang around with Dudley and his gang. She had black curly hair. She was always telling the teachers magic was nonsense. Is she the one you’re talking about?” Harry asked.

Albus nodded. “Yes, that is the girl I was referring to.”

“I didn’t know she and Dudley had a thing.”

“Well, that thing they had is upstairs with your sister right now.”

They all gaped at him and Harry appeared to hum with fury.

“Dorian’s a wizard, isn’t he?” Harry questioned very quietly. Albus nodded. “Let me guess. Sophia had the kid and Dudley wanted nothing to do with him. Of course, Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon don’t want to admit that their precious son knocked someone up so they kept out of it. Then, when Dorian started to display magic, Sophia shoved him at Dudley and told him Dorian was his problem. Of course, Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon didn’t want another little freak in their house, so they called you to take him away. Am I right?” he asked angrily.

“Yes, more or less,” Albus confirmed.

Harry pushed Miri into Severus’ arms. His anger was not something he wanted her to experience, and Severus understood what was going on, so he had Miri raise her barriers. Harry stood up and began to pace.

“What did Dorian hear them say?” Harry asked furiously.

“Everything. I doubt they were trying to hide how they felt.”

Harry continued to pace wrathfully, every now and then throwing out a word or two along the lines of ‘evil’, ‘pathetic’ and ‘lowlifes’. Not even Severus felt it wise to interrupt. By the time Harry had calmed down, Albus had recounted the whole tale, which was just as Harry had said. 

Neither Dudley nor Sophia wanted Dorian, and their families refused to accept that their children had produced a magical child. Petunia had contacted Dumbledore and told him to “Take the little freak, drown him if you like, just get him out of my house. I won’t have another one.”

Solarin watched the whole scene play out in silence and Bill knew there was something up with her. She had raised her barriers, so he didn’t know what was going on in her head. But he knew it had something to do with Dorian. He suspected it was something akin to his own feelings about Dorian, or something similar to them.

“I want him,” Solarin said quietly. No one heard her because of the din of conversation over who should adopt Dorian. She cleared her throat and let off a small series of sparks to get their attentions.

“I’m sorry, Sol, we didn’t hear you,” Sirius said as it quieted.

“I said I want him. I want Dorian,” she said clearly and there was dead silence. 

“Sol, think of what you are saying,” Severus cautioned. “This is a child we are talking about. This is a lot of responsibility. Think of all that has happened to you. Are you really ready to become that child’s mother?”

“Severus, you don’t understand,” Bill said. “I didn’t either, at first, but I do now. Solarin has been dreaming of that little boy for weeks. You always wanted her to use her clairvoyance, now she is.”

“You mean, Sol knew he was coming?” Charlie asked.

“Yes, I did,” she said. “Severus, I know what I’m taking on. I know that taking on a child is a lot of responsibility. But that little boy…I can’t explain. I just know that he’s mine.”

They all peered at her and she let them. She honestly couldn’t explain how she knew, she just did. The dreams, they had possessed a feeling of love, of a protective instinct she couldn’t ignore. As soon as Dorian had walked in the door, she had known immediately that he was hers. There was a lot to work out, firstly how Bill felt about the whole thing, not to mention the legal issues and Dorian’s feelings, to name just a few. 

But she knew for sure that Dorian was her son.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Solarin slipped into the playroom to find Phoenix asleep on the floor. Apparently not even Phoenix’s childish energy had been able to keep up with the little boy.

Dorian was playing quietly by himself, building what seemed to be a castle with some building blocks. It was rather impressive for a two year old, it even had turrets. She suspected that Phoenix had started it. Dorian was concentrating on what appeared to be a lowered drawbridge.

“Hello, Dorian,” Solarin said gently. “I like your castle.”

He peered at her with big blue eyes, and she could sense the fear and confusion swirling in his young mind. His emotions were too easy to read, they were practically screaming at her to give him a hug, to make all the mean words go away.

“My name is Solarin. Can I play too?”

He stared at her for a moment before he held out a bright red brick to her. She slowly moved to him and sat down cross-legged, taking the brick and asking where it should go. Soon enough, Dorian began to relax and began to excitedly grab other toys, wanting to play a million games at once. It took over an hour for him to actually speak.

“I live hewe now?” came the adorable timid voice.

“Do you want to?” she asked and smiled encouragingly as he tilted his head to the side, considering it.

“Are all of you special? Man sayed I’m special.”

“Do you mean Albus, the man who brought you here?” she queried and he nodded. “Yes, we’re all special. We’re called witches and wizards, we can do magic.”

“Sophia sayed magic is silly.”

How strange. Solarin had never before heard of a child referring to their mother by her given name, not a child so young.

[Bill, ask if it’s normal for Dorian to call his mother by her given name. He just called her Sophia,] she pressed into Bill’s mind through the connection, still smiling at Dorian. Bill was sitting with the whole family in the kitchen, one of them must know.

There was a moment of silence before he answered.

[No, that’s not normal. Albus says Sophia never wanted Dorian, but her family is Catholic. Does that mean something?] Bill replied.

[Yes, Catholics do not believe in the use of contraception, or abortion. They also don’t believe in sex before marriage, but I think that’s ignorable at this point. I think what happened was once Sophia’s parents found out she was pregnant, they made her keep Dorian. I’ll keep you posted.]

She closed the connection and smiled at Dorian, who was watching her intently. “Would you like to play with a special toy?” she suggested and there was another tilted head of consideration from the toddler. 

When he nodded, she slowly conjured a ball of light, glowing and changing colour. His face lit up and he eagerly accepted it from her, his mouth a perfect ‘O’ of astonishment.

“It’s pwetty,” Dorian breathed, entranced by the new toy. “I like it.”

“Bill likes them too.”

“Who’s Bill?”

“Bill is my husband. Do you know what that is?”

“Like Vewnon and Petunia,” he said slowly, taking his time so he could actually say their names right. “They didn’t like me. They sayed I’m a fweak.”

She sighed. She really hated that word, even if it did sound adorable coming from the little mouth. 

“Dorian, listen to me. You are not a freak. You are a wizard, which means you can do magic. Everyone here can do magic. It doesn’t make us freaks, it makes us special. And you’re going to live here so you can be with special people,” she explained calmly. “Would you like that?”

“No one gets mad when I make toys fly?” 

“No one will get mad when you do that. Can you show me?”

The bright blue eyes filled with tears and Dorian shook his head. “Don’t want to.” 

Solarin watched as Dorian smacked his arm through the castle he’d built and toddled across the room, plopping down in a mass of stuffed toys and burying himself in them. He began to cry, small sniffling little sobs that broke the augurs heart.

Phoenix, who had been woken by the crash of blocks, peered worriedly at him. 

“Nix, please go downstairs,” Solarin instructed and she cast one last concerned look at Dorian before she left.

Solarin made her way over to the little boy and scooped him up, cuddling him close and letting him cry. She didn’t want to glance into his mind, but she wanted to understand, and Albus had asked her to do it. If she really wanted to adopt Dorian, she would need to fully understand everything that had happened, comprehend what she was up against in raising him.

His mind was a complete whirlwind and it almost knocked her off her feet. She sat down in one of the comfortable chairs with the still crying Dorian on her lap. He burrowed against her and she soothed him with low muttered words of comfort before she tried seeing his past again. 

It was easier the second time around, her own mind prepared for the sudden barrage of his fragile emotional state. She decided after only a few seconds that the poor kid was traumatised. The things he had heard all his life, they were things no child should have to hear. The things Sophia had called him. A burden, a mistake, a parasite. Even if Dorian hadn’t understood what the words meant, he had understood the tone, and he knew his mother didn’t want him. Sophia’s parents had not been much better, most of the time pretending Dorian wasn’t there. When they did notice him, it was to push him away.

Dudley, Vernon and Petunia were a whole other case. Those three needed to be blown up, they were pure venom. What they had called Dorian, to his face no less, didn’t bear repeating. The impact they had left on the child was to make him startlingly volatile. He was so afraid of being pushed to another set of people that would shove him away, that he was prone to sudden bouts of anger and aggression. Dorian would rather it was his behaviour that got him shoved out than something he couldn’t control.

There was one silver lining, though. Dorian had watched TV. And Dorian had seen mummies and daddies. And Dorian wanted one of each more than anything else.

She pulled back from his mind and pressed everything she had seen into Bill’s head, feeling the sudden anger from her husband.

[You know what, I can fully appreciate why Harry hates them so much. I never really understood how people could hate muggles, but I hate those muggles,] Bill said furiously. [Dorian needs a good home, and we want him. I’ll work on Albus and the others, you help Dorian. He is ours, and I won’t have some red tape stand in the way.]

Solarin smiled. [Ours?]

A light mental chuckle. [You thought you were the only one having those dreams? Arin, baby, I knew what you did as soon as he walked in the door. Dorian is ours, and I’ll fight to keep him.]

She sent a mental hug through the connection before she raised her barriers, turning her attentions on the scared toddler in her arms.

Solarin pulled out her wand and silently cast a spell to tidy all the toys away, hearing Dorian gasp as she did it. He watched, bright eyed, as the blocks neatly sorted themselves back into their box, the lid closing with a soft snap.

“You did that?” he asked and she nodded. “I do that.”

“Would you like to show me?”

Dorian screwed up his face in concentration for a moment before a fluffy brown stuffed wolf floated off the floor. Solarin clapped and giggled.

“That is very clever. Aren’t you a clever boy for doing that?” she praised and he beamed at her.

Dorian climbed onto his knees on her lap and took her face in his hands, peering deep into her dark eyes with his own blue ones. He seemed to be searching for something.

“Sarin?” he said timidly.

“Yes, sweetie?”

“Will you be my mummy? I want a mummy and Sophia sayed I’m not to call hew that. And you’we nice, I like you. I like it hewe.”

Solarin smiled. “Well, for me to be your mummy, then you have to get Bill as your daddy. See, me and Bill, we kind of work as a team. Would that be okay?”

Dorian nodded and she pulled him in for a big hug.

Just like that, Solarin and Bill got their miracle.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Bill stifled his chuckle at his mothers never ending smile.

Once Dorian had claimed Bill and Solarin as his parents, Albus had drawn up the adoption papers, signatures had been put down and Dorian had become a Weasley-Snape. It wasn’t even lunchtime when it was all finalised. 

After a lunch of steak pie and roast potatoes, which Dorian had insisted be cut up by Bill, Solarin had decided that she would take Dorian shopping. Dorian had arrived at Grimmauld Place with nothing, not even a spare set of clothes. She was the richest witch in the world, she figured that she might as well put it to good use, and she really wanted to spoil her son rotten. Bill had decided to stay home and sort out Dorian’s room, which he and Solarin had agreed should be the one next to their own.

It was the strangest feeling of déjà vu, decorating a child’s room once again. Bill had already helped decorate Miri’s room, and the ones for Catherine and Joseph. But this was an entirely more enjoyable experience.

His sons room. It had quite a nice ring to it.

“Help, someone, help.”

Bill chuckled as he grabbed a corner of the dresser Sirius was backing into the room with, Remus carrying the other end single handedly. They set it down and Sirius leant against it, gasping and glaring at his smiling husband.

“You and your bright ideas,” Sirius wheezed.

“I didn’t make you do it,” Remus said reasonably. “We could have levitated it, but you’re the one who insisted it be carried by hand. So, what do you think, Bill? It was in the attic. Apparently, it’s a Black family heirloom.”

Bill took a closer look at it. It was solid oak, no chance of being destroyed if Dorian decided to use it as a climbing frame. It was ornately carved, and it was here that Bill found a problem.

“Can we alter it? Somehow, I doubt even my Slytherin wife will want snakes carved into this,” Bill said and Sirius peered at the engravings.

“No, I don’t think basilisks are right for a little boy,” the Animagus agreed. “What do you want them changed to?”

“How about dragons? It seems appropriate with Charlie as his uncle,” Remus suggested and Bill grinned. Soon enough, the slithering snakes had been transfigured into smiling dragons by Sirius, who had seemed ecstatic to see them go.

“Mum, if you fluff those pillows anymore, the poor kid won’t be able to lie down,” Ron said as he and Harry performed various cleaning charms on the carpet.

Molly blushed sheepishly and laid the pillows aside, moving to hold the ladder for Severus as he worked on the chandelier. “I can’t help it. It’s just so exciting. And he’s such an adorable little boy. You must admit, he does look like both of them.”

Arthur smiled in his cleaning of the walk in wardrobe. “Bill’s blue eyes, Solarin’s dark hair. He fits perfectly in this pack.”

“I must agree,” said Severus as he descended the ladder to fetch another light bulb. “He even has messy hair like his Uncle Harry.”

Harry grinned. “I’m an uncle. Hey, aren’t I an uncle to Catherine and Joseph too?”

“I gave up trying to figure out the family connections about the time I walked in the door,” Anne said, carrying in a toy chest.

Phoenix and Ginny had opted to watch the three infants of the house with Hermione while the rooms renovations were underway, and Albus had gone to attend to some other business he had. Personally, Bill suspected Albus had gone to get the Minister to speedily approve the hasty adoption, though he could have gone back to Hogwarts to inform the Professors of the cancelled assessment visit.

Charlie stepped back from the last wall and smiled at his handiwork. The formerly dark, dreary and generally oppressive room that had been a dank shade of puce was now a soft light green. Charlie was just waiting for the day he got to paint a room red. He had suggested it, but Dorian had said he wanted his room to be ‘gween’, and it was said so adorably that Charlie had caved immediately.

“What do you think?” Charlie asked and they all stopped to admire the powdery apple walls.

“Perfect,” Bill said, clapping him on the back.

“You know, Dorian is actually going to need a bed to sleep in,” Arthur called from the closet. “As fluffy as Molly has made them, I don’t think pillows are going to be enough.”

Bill smirked. He hadn’t even thought of a bed for Dorian, he had been too excited on everything else going on around him. At Sirius’ suggestion, he headed towards the attic.

It had long been established that any furniture, old possessions, Black family heirlooms that might prove useful and anything else without a proper place in the house was stashed away in the attic. It was a literal treasure trove of old clothes, toys, books, and other paraphernalia of the Pureblood family that had once inhabited the house.

He searched through the numerous beds that lay in wait to be claimed for some purpose. There were all kinds of them. Four poster, divan, single, double, king size, queen size. Ones with headboards, ones without. Ones with footboards, ones without. Ones with both, ones where all that remained was the mattress or the base. Finally he found what he was searching for.

It was a single bed, obviously designed for a child, because the head end of it had railings, to prevent a midnight tumble. The head and footboards were both decorated with carvings of elves and fairies. He shrunk it and carried it to Dorian’s room.

Once everything had been put in place, thoroughly cleaned and examined for any lingering marks of dark family ownership, the room looked wonderful. Powder green walls, pale blue carpet, wide windows framed by light gossamer curtains, their seats piled high with welcoming cushions. The bed, covered with fluffy pillows and squashy covers, the dresser, the toy chest. 

It looked perfect. All that was missing was one energy filled little boy.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

“Red or green?” Solarin asked, holding up a stuffed dragon in each colour.

So far, she and Dorian had shopped for clothes, which had taken over an hour to get an entire muggle wardrobe (she dreaded how long they would have to spend in Madame Malkin’s so she decided that could wait for another day), books, which had been a test in parental negotiation as Dorian had wanted all of them, and shoes, which had been an experience that could only be equalled by bloodshed. At least getting him his toothbrush and other necessities had been simple, though she did end up giving in and getting him fourteen different kinds of bubble bath.

Now was the fun part, the toys. At this point, they had already amassed more than 200 galleons in toys, but she wasn’t past the point of reason. She had stipulated that Dorian could not have three complete train sets, nor could he have a full working broomstick. As tempted as she was to buy him one, it was just too dangerous to allow a two and a half year old on a broomstick. She was utterly exhausted, and sorely seeking a cigarette, but it was worth it. The one thing that kept her going was the bright smile on the child’s face. That look he had of complete wonder and joy, she couldn’t get enough of it. 

“Miwi has gween. I seed it at lunch,” Dorian said. “So, wed.”

She really was going to have to teach him how to say ‘r’s, but today wasn’t the day. “Alright, red it is. And you’re very right, Miri does have a green one, you saw it at lunch. How about we pay for all this and then go home?” she suggested, noticing the way he shifted from foot to foot.

“My feet huwt,” Dorian said, nodding, and she laughed.

“Mine too. Let’s go show your daddy all your new stuff.”

Solarin paid for the toys and shrunk them down with the rest of their purchases before she scooped him up and Apparated home.

The kitchen was eerily silent. Solarin set the little boy down on the table and began to peel off his footwear as she reached out through her connection.

[Where are you?] she asked.

A moment of shocked silence. [Are you trying to scare the shit out of me?] came Bill’s startled reply. 

[Try putting your barriers up. Once again, where are you?]

[Dorian’s room. It’s finished. He’s so going to love it, green, just like he asked for. Where are you?]

[Kitchen. Your son has wonderful taste, very expensive,] she joked. [If we managed to miss anything out that he needs, you can take him next time. I am knackered. Question, how can so much energy be stuffed into one little body?]

Bill was coming downstairs, she could hear him laughing on the way. Everyone else was with him too. Sometimes, her abilities really did come in handy.

“Did he tire you out?” Bill teased as he entered the room, Dorian barrelling forwards to be picked up by Bill once Solarin had set him on his bare feet. [Funny, you usually have such stamina,] he mindspoke as he verbally uttered, “I see what you mean, so much energy. So, where is all this stuff you bought?”

She smirked. [I’ll prove how much stamina I have later,] she mentally scolded as she said, “Don’t be fooled by the one bag. I shrunk it all as we went.” She upturned the bag and resized everything at once.

Bill gaped at it all and then laughed. “One little boy and you bought enough to supply the fifty thousand.”

[Shut it. You have no idea how much one of these needs,] she scolded as she plucked Dorian out of his arms. “How about some juice and a snack?” she asked the little boy, who nodded enthusiastically.

The family poured over the purchases, sorting them into piles, as Solarin fixed Dorian a plastic cup of apple juice and a sandwich. As she attempted to sit him at the table, she remembered how they’d had to sit him on a thick book at lunch.

“Anyone seen the booster seat I bought?” she questioned, Ron handing to her. She attached it to a chair and firmly strapped Dorian into it. 

“Hey, Dorian, do you want to see your room after your snack?” Charlie said with a smile and the tiny boy nodded, his cheeks bulging.

It took a startlingly short amount of time for such a tiny mouth to consume a whole sandwich, and then Bill scooped him up and carried him to his new room, setting him down so he could scamper in and jump on the bed.

[Will that stand up to being a trampoline?] Solarin pressed into her husbands mind.

[Sirius assures me that all the Black family heirlooms are centuries old and charmed to prevent destruction by toddler. He told me all the furniture will handle Dorian attacking it,] he reassured as he moved to the dresser, putting away pyjamas and socks and boxers, all of them in tiny sizes.

Solarin smiled at Dorian’s chattered instructions to Charlie on where his new toys should go. [Why can I taste red wine?]

Bill chuckled. [Let’s just say the furniture could have given our son nightmares. It needed a little…alteration, shall we say.] He pressed a quick mental synopsis of the transformation of the bedroom into her mind and she peered distrustfully at the dresser. [Don’t worry, it’s all been checked, did it myself. So, do you like the room?]

Solarin glanced around, taking in the room now most of Dorian’s new things were in it, the last of his clothes being arranged in the closet by Molly. 

“I don’t know why you’re asking me if I like it,” she said slowly, feeling the sudden apprehension from everyone in the room. She casually made her way over to the child holding his arms out for her. “It’s not my room. You should be asking my beautiful baby boy if he likes it.”

Just as Solarin reached for Dorian, something hit her so hard she went crashing to the floor, gasping to catch her breath. Dorian screamed and Harry was the first to him, scooping him up and comforting him while Bill checked the augur over.

Solarin lay very still on the floor, trying to figure out what the hell had just happened. She had felt something like it once before, but she couldn’t quite pinpoint where, when or from who. It was so familiar, the experience of being hit by a train.

[Solarin! Arin, baby, talk to me!] came Bill’s frantic call, but there was something else, something new. And then it occurred to her where she had felt it before. 

[My mummy. I want my mummy’s cuddles. Is my mummy okay? Is my mummy huwt?] It was low, barely above a whisper, but it was there. Just the same as Bill’s had been the first time they had spoken in mindspeak.

Dorian’s voice in her head.

She tentatively reached her mind out to his. [I’m here, baby. Mummy’s okay, I just got a little dizzy. Just give me a minute and I’ll give you a cuddle, okay?]

Dorian nodded, confusing all of them, and she looked at Bill. “I’m okay, just give me a minute,” she said shakily.

“What happened?” Bill asked, helping her sit up.

She grinned and motioned for Harry to put Dorian down. He did so and the child toddled over to her, plopping down and cuddling up to her. “Dorian, do you want to tell them what we just did?”

“Okay.”

“You have to say it with your mouth or they won’t hear you,” she advised and he nodded. “Go on then, baby, tell them what happened.”

“I talked to mummy in here,” he said, tapping his own curly head. “She sayed she was dizzy.”

They all stared at her and Severus wasted no time in stalking out of the room to call Moody, Sam and Dumbledore. The family decided that this was one of those moments when their presence would not be appreciated and slipped from the room.

“You spoke mindspeak with Dorian?” Bill asked incredulously.

“Yup. That’s what made me dizzy, suddenly having another mind attached to my own. The same thing happened the first time you entered my head. Don’t you remember? We were down by the lake and I keeled over. You panicked then, too,” she explained and he sighed in relief. 

Bill looked thoughtfully at his son. “Do you think I’ll get to do it?”

“What, form a connection with Dorian?”

“Yeah.”

Solarin peered at her husband and then her son. As far as any of them knew, her connection with Bill was unique. The one she now had with Dorian was the same, unheard of. Theoretically, she could see how it could work, if she was strong enough to forge the connection. It wasn’t so dissimilar to when she transferred emotions. All she had to do was nourish the emotional connection Dorian was forming with Bill, and then try and merge their minds, the way Dorian had done with her automatically. Well, that was the idea anyway, practice would prove to be its own hurdle.

“Theoretically, it could be possible. I’d have to discuss it with Mad-Eye, and Sam, see if I’m up to it. But I don’t see any potential problems. This is all theory, so don’t get your hopes up,” she hypothesised. 

Bill grinned. Dorian clambered into Bill’s lap and lisped, “My daddy.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Bill watched as Moody took a closer look at his son.

Dorian forming such close connections to he and Solarin in less than a day was a worrying sign. For the bond between Dorian and Solarin to be strong enough for them to mindspeak, the bond had gone beyond what it should. 

It had taken Bill a year to forge such a connection with Solarin, and even then it had not hit the augur that hard. She had not keeled over that suddenly. And it had taken her much longer to be able to speak back through it.

Dorian was clinging to Solarin, eyeing Moody nervously. Dorian’s little arms were wrapped around Solarin’s neck, his bright blue eyes fixed on the grizzled Auror. 

“Dorian, can you answer some questions for us?” Moody asked gently.

The tiny boy buried his face in Solarin’s neck.

Sam came forwards, motioning for Moody to take a step back. Sam was used to dealing with nervous children in his line of work, he had more chance of getting Dorian to relax and let them take a look at him.

“Hello, Dorian,” the healer said cheerfully. “Can you tell me how old you are?”

Dorian held up two fingers and Sam smiled.

“Two. Aren’t you a big boy? Hey, Dorian, you know how you talked to mummy in your head?” Sam asked and Dorian nodded. “Well, that is so special. Can you tell me how you did that?”

“Don’t know,” the toddler mumbled.

Sam smiled. “That’s okay, we all do things like that sometimes, things we can’t explain. All we want to do is try and find out how you did it. See, your mummy is a very special lady, she can do some very special things. But, some of those things, they can make mummy very ill. All we want to do is see if everything’s okay with you and mummy. Would that be all right?”

Dorian peered at the man, and Harry could suddenly appreciate why the man was such a good healer. He was so relaxed and cheerful that Dorian was soon holding out his arms to him, letting Sam scoop him up and sit him on the kitchen table. 

“Dorian, can you tell me if your head hurts?” Sam said.

“No, my head doesn’t huwt,” Dorian replied after a reassuring smile from Bill. “Did I do something bad?”

“No, sweetheart, you didn’t do anything bad, nothing at all. We’re just so surprised because your daddy was the only one who could talk to mummy in his head. No one else could do it. We just want to make sure you’re all right, that you didn’t get hurt when you talked to mummy like that. Lots and lots of people aren’t special enough to talk to mummy in their heads,” Sam said. “Now, you see this man?” He motioned to Moody and Dorian nodded. “Well, his name is Mad-Eye, and he taught your mummy to do all her special things. Me and him, we kind of take care of mummy, and she wants Mad-Eye to check and see if you’re okay.”

Dorian looked at Solarin. “Weally?”

She smiled and nodded. “Mad-Eye’s just going to take a quick look at you, and when he’s done, you can help Nana Molly with dinner, okay baby?”

Dorian nodded and Moody ran several diagnostic spells on the child before he smiled. “All right, Dorian, I’m all done now,” Moody said and the tiny boy scampered off to help Molly with dinner.

“So?” Solarin asked.

Moody smiled at her. “He’s an empath.”

Solarin started to laugh, and they had to wait for her to stop before she explained. 

“An empath is kind of like a watered down version of an augur. They’re not as rare as me and Miri, but they are unusual,” Solarin explained. “When Dorian touches someone he knows how they feel. It’s common for an empath to form strong emotional bonds with people they have only just met.” They looked a little confused. “Okay, when Dorian first arrived, he was clinging to Albus. In Albus’ mind, this is a safe haven, so Dorian immediately picked up that he was safe here. When I was in the playroom with him, Dorian got upset and I held him. He picked up how much I wanted him. At lunch, Dorian wanted Bill to cut up his lunch. Bill covered Dorian’s hands with his own, he touched him. Dorian picked up how much Bill wants him. At some point or other, he has touched all of us. He’s picked up on our emotions, our wants.”

“So, he’s like a sponge?” Harry asked, bouncing Miri on his knee.

“Basically, yes,” she confirmed. 

“And the connection?” Severus enquired.

“I’m not surprised Dorian formed a connection with his new mother,” Moody said. “An empath forms a strong bond with their mother. Because Dorian is adopted, the formation of this bond was accelerated. The connection is just another part of that bond.”

“Could I form a connection with him?” Bill questioned. “I mean, could I form a connection strong enough for me to mindspeak with Dorian?”

Moody peered at him, considering it. “I don’t see why not,” he hypothesised. “You’re strong enough to forge a connection with a very powerful augur, I don’t see why you couldn’t form one with an empath. Solarin would, obviously, have to help you in creating it, and it would be essential for you to spend quite a bit of time with Dorian. It would take longer than the connection he has with Solarin, but I see no reason why you couldn’t form a similar connection.”

Bill couldn’t wipe the silly grin off of his face.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Severus rolled over intending to wrap his arms around Harry. He seemed to have rolled away from him in the night. But all Severus came up with was air. 

Severus opened his eyes and looked around. He was alone in the room, and the clock said it was gone ten. He slipped from the bed and checked the nursery for Miri. It was empty and he began to panic.

It was a reoccurring nightmare for him to wake up and find his family gone. This was not a pleasant experience for Severus. 

He grabbed his wand and was about to go find his husband and child when Phoenix appeared at the top of the stairs.

“Sol said you were awake now and I could bring you some coffee,” the witch said, handing him a mug. 

He took it dazedly. “Thank you. Nix, where are Harry and Miri?” he questioned as calmly as he could.

“Miri’s in the playroom with Hermione and the twins, and Dorian and Bill, and Harry’s in the garden. Why? Didn’t Harry tell you he was getting up?”

Severus released the breath he hadn’t realised he had been holding. “No, he didn’t. How long has he been up?”

“Hours. He and Miri came down about seven.”

“What’s he doing in the garden?”

“Playing Quidditch with Ron, Charlie, Tonks, Fred, George and Ginny. They’re breaking in his quaffle, the one from his Quidditch set, the one he got for his birthday,” she said. “Shall I tell nana you want some breakfast?”

Severus laughed. He had gotten worked up for a game of Quidditch. “Yes, please. I’ll be down in a minute.”

Severus put his coffee on his bedside table and quickly showered and dressed before making his way downstairs. Anne handed him a few slices of toast and he made his way out to the garden. 

Merlin, Harry was breathtaking in the air. Severus had forgotten just how good a flier his husband was. He made his way over to stand with Sirius.

“Morning,” Sirius said. “Sleep well?”

“I did. Why didn’t Harry wake me?”

“He said he thought you needed the rest,” Sirius said. “You got scared, didn’t you? When you couldn’t find him?”

Severus took a bite of toast and shrugged.

“It’s okay, you know. I won’t tell a soul. Good, isn’t he?”

Severus smiled. “Very. No wonder you came to watch him as Snuffles. I admit, it is one of the things I have always envied.”

“Explain,” Sirius commanded.

“Haven’t you noticed Solarin looking a little green?”

Sirius looked over to the augur and noticed that she appeared to be fighting the urge to pass out. “Is she ill?”

Severus chuckled. “No, not ill, but she and I do share a certain hatred of broomsticks,” Severus revealed. “You should have seen Sol trying to learn to fly. I swear, I have never seen her so terrified of an inanimate object.”

Sirius dissolved into a fit of giggles. Remus looked over from where he was throwing basketballs at the players and Sirius motioned that he would tell him later.

The wonders of living in a magical house, all the enchantments hiding the flying players from prying neighbours eyes. The game was simple enough. Three aside, Harry, George and Tonks on one team, Ginny, Fred and Charlie on the other. Harry and Ginny as Seekers, Tonks and Charlie as Chasers, trying to steal the quaffle from each other, and Fred and George as Beaters, fending off the basketballs. Ron was playing Keeper for both teams. Arthur was controlling a gold painted golf ball in place of a snitch, Remus was throwing basketballs in place of bludgers and Sam was keeping score. It was too dangerous to use real bludgers, too much chance of them getting loose and maiming a muggle, and a real snitch could easily get away from them and be lost.

Severus discovered that Ron had felt it wise to have a practice with Harry before he actually played for Gryffindor, see how Harry would handle being on a broomstick again. The redhead had worried it might trigger some bad memories for his friend, and so he had decided it would be best for Harry to try it at home first. Severus found he really appreciated Ron’s presence in their lives. Severus hadn’t even considered if Harry would be able to handle playing Quidditch.

“How are you and Remus doing?” Severus asked as he sipped his coffee, watching Harry come out of a spectacular Wronski Feint.

“Oh, we’re fine now. All back on track,” Sirius said.

“And the after effects of him reasserting himself?”

“Gone. The healing bath really helped. Remus got rid of most of the marks after a day or so. He did leave the ones on my chest, something about them, he likes those ones. I’m not complaining. Having Remus mark me is a lot better than Azkaban doing it,” Sirius said. He sniggered. “You know, if someone had told me twenty years ago that I would actually get along with you, I’d have called them a bloody liar.”

Severus chuckled. “I must agree. We did not start off on the best foot. But Harry managed to do what no one else could. Harry managed to get us to be friendly,” Severus said, making Sirius smile.

“So, you hate broomsticks?”

“Yes,” Severus confirmed. “Something about being that high up with only a piece of wood to stop me falling to my death never sat too well with me, strangely.”

“Hear, hear,” Solarin said, joining them and covering her eyes with a groan as George narrowly saved Harry from being hit by a bludger basketball. “Please, I beg you, make them stop.”

“Why are you watching if it makes you feel like this?” Sirius questioned with a smile.

“One simple reason: Dorian,” she said, making them frown in confusion. “As soon as he saw the broomsticks, he wanted to get on one. I’m sorry, but two is far too young to have my son fifty feet up. So Bill decided now was a good time to spend time with him, help their bond, and he wants to know how the game goes. He’s currently pissing himself laughing at me.”

The two men sniggered and cheered as Harry caught the snitch golf ball. The players landed and Solarin breathed a sigh of relief.

Harry excitedly made his way over to Severus. “We won!” he gushed.

“Indeed. Well done. Did you have fun?” Severus enquired, smiling at Harry’s grin and enthusiastic nod. “Well, that is very good. However, I would like to be woken next time. It was not a pleasant experience waking up to find you and Miri missing.”

Harry squirmed guiltily. “I’m sorry, Severus, but you looked so peaceful, I didn’t want to wake you. It’s been so long since you slept through Miri, you deserved a lie in,” Harry explained, making Severus pull him in for a kiss.

“In that case, you are completely forgiven,” Severus said with a smile. 

“In that case, is it okay if we play another game?”

Severus smirked. “You may play as long as you like.”

“Ah, sorry to spoil the fun, but Bill says Miri’s asking for her carrier. Might have to postpone the rematch for a bit,” Solarin said. 

Harry nodded and passed her his Firebolt before he made his way inside. She immediately passed it to Tonks, shuddering and muttering ‘deathtrap’.

Tonks grinned and looked thoroughly impressed. “Severus, do you think Harry would mind if I had a quick spin?” the Auror asked.

“I don’t see why he would. Go on, have fun,” Severus said and she mounted the broom, kicking off and squealing at how fast it was. Sam made his way over to the group.

“Never liked broomsticks myself,” the healer said. “Always ended up with far too many bruises.”

“Must be a werewolf thing,” Remus said as he joined them. “I learnt to fly and that was more than enough. James used to let me have a go on his broom, but I always came away bruised to kingdom come.”

Sirius grinned. “I don’t remember complaints of my fussing at those bruises,” he said.

“I rather enjoyed that fussing. It was very enjoyable as I recall,” Remus joked.

“Personally, I think you’re all nuts,” Solarin said, determinedly avoiding looking at Tonks retrieving a basketball from the roof. “Who wants to be dangling that far from the ground on a piece of wood?”

Sirius stared at her and opened his mouth to try and explain it when Bill appeared in the doorway with Dorian in his arms. 

“Don’t bother, I’ve been trying since she was eleven,” the curse breaker advised. “My lovely wife has a thing about heights.”

“It’s not heights that get me,” Solarin argued. “It’s the lack of a floor at that height.”

Bill sniggered and Dorian grinned. “Mummy, can I go on a bwoomstick?”

“No,” she said immediately. “No way.”

“But Uncle Hawy is allowed.”

“Uncle Harry is not two years old.”

“Auntie Ginny gets to have a go.”

“Once again, Auntie Ginny is not two years old.”

Dorian argued with Solarin until Sirius intervened. “How about I take him up on Tonks’ Cleensweep?” he suggested.

“Thanks for the offer, but no,” Solarin said firmly.

Remus smiled. “Sirius has never crashed anything in his life. Dorian will be perfectly safe,” he reassured and they could all see her begin to waver. “The Cleensweep is much slower than the Firebolt, no zooming to the moon. One lap around the garden, that’s all.”

She sighed. “You’re not going to stop until I give in, are you?”

“Nope,” Sirius said. 

“Best just to agree,” Severus advised and she reluctantly handed her son to Sirius.

“One lap, that is it,” she demanded and Sirius nodded. 

Solarin buried her head in Bill’s chest as Sirius lapped around the garden, Dorian sitting just in front of him, laughing his delight. Sirius kept one arm firmly around the tiny boy, and the other hand fixed on the broom handle. Bill rubbed Solarin’s back as he grinned at his son’s glee.

Eventually, after seven laps around the garden, Sirius landed and Solarin took a full breath once more.

“That was not one lap,” she griped as she cuddled Dorian close, the little boy grinning from ear to ear.

“What can I say, his happiness is infectious,” Sirius defended. “Just wait until he sees my bike.”

“Absolutely not, it’s a deathtrap. I am not letting you take my son on that monstrosity,” she said decisively, making Remus laugh.

“Told you so,” the werewolf said. “Pay up.”

Sirius handed over five galleons. “It was worth a shot. You know, Sol, you just sounded scarily like Lily. She said the exact same thing when me and James fixed a sidecar to the bike for Harry to use.”

“You had a sidecar on the bike?” Harry asked as he returned with Miri in his arms. “One baby with a clean nappy who wants her daddy.”

Severus took his daughter and she babbled at him, waving Smoo. “Good morning, sweetheart.”

“Yes, me and James put it on. Lily had a fit,” Sirius said as he stroked Miri’s curls, making Harry smile. “She told us, in no uncertain terms, that if we ever let you near my bike she would castrate us both. We believed her, and the sidecar was removed.”

“Eventually,” Remus added, making Sirius smile sheepishly.

“Eventually,” he agreed. “It took until I moved back in here for me to remove it. I kept hoping she’d change her mind. I tell you something for free, your mother could be one scary witch when she wanted to be, Harry. Positively terrifying sometimes. She used to scare the hell out of James.”

Solarin sniggered. “Kind of the way Molly does to Arthur?”

“Molly is tame compared to Lily,” Remus said. Harry was starting to look uncomfortable so he decided to change the subject. It was almost Halloween, which was always a difficult day for all of them. “You missed Dorian’s first fly, Harry.”

“And last,” Solarin put in.

“Oh, come on, I didn’t drop him,” Sirius said. “You got him back, safe and sound, all his pieces intact.”

“Be that as it may, I would rather my toddler didn’t spend too much time on broomsticks.”

“He had fun,” Bill put in.

Solarin sighed. “I think we can safely say he’s your son. Little daredevil.”

“Changing the subject,” Remus said. “Sam, has she told Andie yet?”

“Andie?” Sam asked.

“Andromeda, Nymphadora’s mother,” Sirius supplied. “Has Tonks told her about you yet?”

“No, I haven’t,” Tonks said as she landed. “And I don’t plan on it anytime soon.”

“Are you ashamed of me?” Sam questioned, looking a little unsure of himself.

“No, I’m not ashamed of you, baby. I just want to spare you.” Everyone looked confused and she sighed as Remus and Sirius smiled. “My mother never thought I would settle down. She even gave the family rocking chair to Harry because she never thought I’d have children to use it for. As soon as she finds out about you, you’re going to be attacked, and I don’t mean in the way I do it. You’ll be lucky if she ever lets you out of her sight. She’ll probably want us to get married immediately. I’m sorry, Sam, as much as I love you, I am not ready to marry you.”

Sam grinned and Sirius looked very guilty.

“Sirius, why the guilt all of a sudden?” Solarin asked.

“No reason,” the Animagus said evasively.

Sirius didn’t have to explain, and Harry jumped a foot in the air as a very loud scream came from the doorway. Harry turned around to find a woman who looked quite a bit like Bellatrix Lestrange standing there, smiling wider than Harry had ever seen someone smile without cracking their face. There was a chubby man standing behind her wearing an apologetic smile.

Tonks groaned and attempted to hit Sirius, before the woman ran forwards and hugged her so tightly, Harry was shocked Tonks’ head didn’t pop off.

“Oh, honey! I am so happy for you!” the woman shrieked. On closer inspection, the woman didn’t look that much like Bellatrix. Her eyes were the same bright blue as Sirius’, and she was willowy like him too. 

“Mum, get off me! I can’t breathe!” Tonks yelled. “Dad, make her stop!”

The new man came forwards and pulled at the woman’s arm. “Dromeda, let go of her, she needs oxygen,” he said.

The woman let go and looked around at all of them. “I’m sorry, dear, I’m just so happy. You and Sam! To think, you used to use him as a climbing frame as a toddler.”

“Dad, if you don’t shut her up I will hurt her,” Tonks hissed.

“Come on, love, be reasonable. There is no way I’m going to be able to stop her on this one,” her father said.

“Sam, make her stop,” Tonks pleaded. It was the wrong thing to say, as it caused Tonks’ mother’s eyes to land on the healer.

“Hello, Mrs. Tonks, it’s been a long time,” Sam said and then choked as Tonks’ mother hugged him.

“Oh, please Sam, call me Andromeda, we’re family now.”

“Mother, will you please tone it down? You’re scaring Harry,” Tonks said and everyone noticed just how panicked Harry looked.

Severus passed Miri to Remus and pulled Harry into his arms. “Are you all right, love?” he murmured in his ear.

“She made me jump. I’m okay, just give me a minute. New people, I just got a bit spooked. I’m okay, really. Just give me a moment,” Harry replied, burying his face in his husband’s chest.

Severus kissed the top of his head. “All right, love. Take your time,” he murmured before he addressed the group. “He’s okay, just give him a minute. Andromeda just made him jump.”

After a moment, Harry pulled away and looked around. “I’m okay now. Sorry everyone.”

“It’s all right, pup. Trust me when I say Andie’s seen worse,” Sirius said. “Everyone, this is my cousin Andromeda Tonks and her husband, Ted Tonks.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Tonks,” Harry said, holding out his hand to her.

She took it and laughed. “We’ve met before Harry. I was at your Christening,” she said. “I must say, you’re a lot taller now.”

They all laughed and moved to start another game, which Tonks jumped at to free herself from her mother’s clutches. Bill took over the basketball bludgers, leaving Remus free to talk with Andromeda.

“So, how is my favourite cousin and his gorgeous wolfish lover?” Andromeda asked, slinging an arm around Sirius’ shoulders.

“Gorgeous wolfish husband, thank you very much, and we are doing very well. House full of family, two beautiful children, one gorgeous grandchild, and a son-in-law I actually get along with, even if he was a snake,” Sirius said.

“My, my, my, you two have been busy. When you sent me the letter inviting me to meet your family, I wasn’t expecting that much family,” she said, laughing. “Come on then, reel them off.

As Sirius opened his mouth to speak, he was cut off by a loud call from the doorway.

“Daddy, papa, try one of my brownies! Look, I made them all by myself,” Phoenix said as she walked over carrying a plate.

“Line your stomach,” Sirius murmured in Remus’ ear, earning a shove and a smile, before he grinned and accepted a brownie from his daughter.

Remus grabbed the plate as it threatened to tumble out of Phoenix’ hands and Sirius cautiously took a nibble.

“You can stop worrying, Sirius, I supervised every step,” Molly called from the doorway. “Hello, Andromeda. I didn’t hear you arrive.”

“She was too busy suffocating me and Sam,” Tonks called from above.

“You know, I think I might keep this one down,” Sirius said. “Nixie, come and meet my cousin Andromeda and her husband, Ted. They’re Tonks’ parents. Andie, this is Nixie.”

“Still shortening names I see,” Andromeda said. “Hello, Nixie. What’s that short for?”

“Phoenix,” Severus said.

“Following family tradition. Very nice. Very out of character.”

“We didn’t chose the name, Nixie did,” Remus said. Andromeda looked confused and the werewolf smiled. “Nixie, how about you explain it all for your Aunt Andie?”

“Okay. I was Draco Lucius Malfoy, but I wasn’t really a boy, I was under a concealment charm all along. Then the concealment was lifted and it turns out I was a girl all along. So I chose a new name when Lucius disowned me, and I got to pick my own family too. So I picked this family,” she reeled off and Andromeda laughed. “Now, I’m Phoenix Rose Lupin-Black.”

“Ah, now I see why she looks so much like you, Siri. It is very nice to meet you, Nixie. Can I have a brownie?”

Phoenix practically lit up and happily nodded. 

“Oh, my God, I can’t watch! Sirius, take Dorian,” Solarin said, handing the clapping little boy to the Animagus as Harry pulled out of yet another perfect Wronski Feint. “I’m going to have my heart attack inside.”

She disappeared and they all laughed. “Who was that?” Andromeda asked.

“Solarin Eileen Weasley-Snape, my daughter-in-law, kind of. She’s Harry’s sister-in-law,” Sirius said. “And this is Dorian Weasley-Snape, her son. Dorian, say hi.”

“Hi,” Dorian said, waving his pudgy little hand at the woman. “Mummy doesn’t like bwoomsticks, but Uncle Siwius took me on Auntie Tonks’ one wound the gawden. Daddy likes bwoomsticks.”

“Who’s your daddy, Dorian?” Andromeda asked, smiling widely. “How about you tell me who everyone is?”

“Okay,” Dorian said. “That’s my daddy, the one thwowing the balls fow Uncle Wemus so Uncle Wemus can talk. And this is my Uncle Sevwus, he’s mummy’s bwothew. He’s mawied to Uncle Hawy, who gets to go up thewe. And they have Miwi, who has a gween dwagon toy and is a special witch like mummy.”

Dorian paused to catch his breath, and everyone looked highly impressed that he remembered all that after only a day of being in the house.

“Then thewe’s my Uncle Won and Auntie Miney, who awe the mummy and daddy of Cathwine and Joseph. Uncle Won is daddy’s bwothew, he has a lot of them. Like Uncle Fwed and Uncle Geowge, who match, and Uncle Chawlie, who kisses Auntie Nixie. And I have two nana’s, I have Nana Molly and Nana Annie. And thewe’s Uncle Sam, who kisses Auntie Tonks, and Uncle Siwius, who kisses Uncle Wemus, and thewe’s Auntie Ginny, and my Gwandpa’s. Gwandpa Awthuw, who is mawied to Nana Molly, and Gwandpa Jack, who is Uncle Sam’s daddy, and likes to kiss Nana Annie, who is Uncle Wemus’ mummy.”

He took another deep breath and they were all stunned at how well he was reeling it all off. So far, he hadn’t made a single mistake.

“Nana Molly and Gwandpa Awthuw are the mummy and daddy of Uncle Geowge, Uncle Fwed, Uncle Won, Uncle Chawlie, Auntie Ginny and daddy. Uncle Siwius, my head huwts,” Dorian finished, making them laugh.

“I’ll get him something for it,” Severus said, disappearing inside.

“Okay, I am very impressed. How old is he?” Andromeda said, stunned.

“He’ll be three this December,” Remus said, stroking the unruly dark hair. “Hasn’t quite mastered ‘r’s yet, but we’re getting there.”

“Now I feel stupid. Hey, Remus, you remember how Sirius drew you a diagram of our family?” Remus nodded. “Do you think I could get one of those for this family?”

“I’ll see what I can do,” he said with a laugh as Severus reappeared with a sippy cup.

“One kiddie pain potion. Here you go, Dorian. Drink this and your head won’t hurt anymore,” Severus said, handing Dorian the cup.

“Thank you, Uncle Sevwus.”

“Solarin…do you mean Solly Prince?” Andromeda asked.

“That’s the one. You remember her from my schooldays mum,” Tonks called from above.

“That’s right! Solly, Dora and Bill, inseparable, all three.”

“Well, now Bill and Sol are married with a little boy,” Sirius said and Andromeda smiled.

They talked about nothing in particular, Sirius filling Andromeda in on everything, until Tonks lost control of her broom and had to be scooped out of the air by Harry. The game was stopped and Harry slowly drifted to the ground, where Sam grabbed Tonks and checked her for any kind of injury. 

“What happened?” Sam asked, frantically running his hands over her arms.

“I don’t know. The broom just went out of control,” she said. “Calm down, baby, I’m okay. You have a wonderful flier for a nephew.”

“Sam doesn’t do calm, not when someone he cares about nearly went splat,” Andromeda said.

“Wait, do you two know each other already?” Harry asked Andromeda and Sam.

“Yes, we do. Jack was a friend of Ted’s father, they used to come for dinner. That was a while ago, when Sam was still training to be a healer.”

“Are you sure you’re all right, Dora?” Ted questioned. 

“I’m fine, dad, really. I think my broom has had it though,” Tonks said.

Arthur appeared to say that lunch was ready and they moved inside, Sam still fussing over Tonks.

Lunch was a happy affair, Sirius and Andromeda entertaining the family with tales of their younger days, most of which included pissing off their parents. Andromeda proudly proclaimed that the best day of her life was the one in which her mother threw her out of the house for marrying a Muggleborn. Sirius revealed that he had left home at sixteen and gone straight to James’, seeking refuge from his own arranged marriage. His father had tracked him down and beaten him to a pulp. Sirius had then jumped on his bike and hightailed it to Remus’, where he stayed until he was imprisoned.

“I must admit, learning to live with Sirius was a lesson in patience,” Remus teased as they nibbled on the last of lunch.

“Oh, we fully understand,” Charlie said.

“Oi! I’m not that hard to live with,” Sirius argued, grinning.

“Oh no, absolute picnic,” Severus said. “I especially liked the broken nose on the morning of my wedding. That was very enjoyable, a real taste of things to come.”

“In my defence, I had just found out about you claiming my son,” Sirius said. “And I think we get along very well now.”

“True. We have our moments.”

“So, Harry, when do you go to Hogwarts to play?” Ted asked.

“The first week of November. Professor Dumbledore is even laying on the train for us. Miri’s too young to travel by floo and I don’t like Apperation,” Harry said.

While the family launched into talk of Quidditch, Solarin grinned at the adorable mindspeak.

[Is that lady Auntie Tonks’ mummy?] Dorian asked.

[Yes, her name is Andie, and she’s Tonks’ mummy.]

[And that man is her daddy?]

[Yes, that’s Tonks’ daddy. His name is Ted.]

“Whewe awe youw mummy and daddy?”

The whole room went silent and Solarin was completely dumbstruck. What a question. She wasn’t quite sure how to explain it to him.

“Dorian, that’s a very grown up question to ask. Why do you ask it?” Severus questioned.

“Daddy has a mummy and daddy, and now Auntie Tonks. Even Uncle Wemus has a mummy. Whewe’s mummy’s mummy and daddy? And youws. Whewe awe they?”

Everyone looked at Solarin expectantly and she took a long drink. [What the hell do I tell him?] she pressed into Bill’s mind.

[I’m sure you’ll think of something,] he reassured.

She took a deep breath. “Dorian, do you know what it means when someone dies?” she said.

“Uh-huh. It means they go away and you can’t see them anymore,” he said.

“That’s right. Well, me and Severus have the same mummy and daddy, and our mummy died a long time ago, when I was a little bit bigger than you.”

“Who took cawe of you?”

“Severus took care of me, kind of like me and daddy take care of you.”

“What about youw daddy?”

“He died too,” Solarin said, glossing over everything else.

“Why doesn’t Uncle Hawy have a mummy?”

[Is it me, or is he getting really good at asking things we don’t want to answer?] Bill pushed into her head.

[It’s not just you.]

“Dorian, you know how you got to pick Solarin and Bill to be your parents?” Harry said and Dorian nodded. “Well, I got to pick Remus and Sirius as mine because my first mummy and daddy died.”

“Is that why Auntie Nixie doesn’t have a mummy either? Because she picked new daddies?”

“That’s right,” Harry said. “See, we’re very lucky, me and you and Nixie, because we got to have mummies and daddies who really love us and want us to be with them.”

Dorian tilted his head to the side, considering all the information, before he smiled.

“Okay. Can I have some mowe juice, please?”

Severus leaned in close to Harry as the conversation started up once more. “I’m impressed,” he said. “That was very diplomatically put.”

Harry smiled. “It’s true. I just had to figure out how to say it to him so he’d understand.”

Severus captured his lips in a sweet kiss. “I think you can stop worrying about your parenting skills now, love. I think you’ve got them down to a tee.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Harry awoke to find Severus nibbling his neck.

“Mmmmmm, good morning,” Harry croaked.

“Good mowning, Uncle Hawy.”

Harry and Severus shot up in bed, their eyes landing on the pint-sized spectator. Dorian was sitting on the end of their bed, cuddling his red dragon toy.

“When did he get there?” Harry murmured.

“No idea. I rolled over and started kissing your neck without opening my eyes,” Severus mumbled back.

“Dorian, how long have you been sitting on our bed?” Harry asked.

“A little bit. I woke up and mummy and daddy wewe still sleeping and I have a question.”

“What’s your question?”

“Who’s Miwi’s mummy?”

The two men sat there in shock. Okay, how did they explain that one to a two year old? More importantly, what did Bill and Solarin want Dorian to know? Dorian was, after all, their son. Maybe they hadn’t explained it to him because they didn’t think he was old enough to understand.

“There you are,” Bill said from the doorway. “Me and mummy went to wake you and you weren’t in your bed, little man. Did he wake you?”

“Not exactly,” Severus said. “Dorian, why don’t you ask your daddy your question?”

Bill came forwards and picked Dorian up, sitting down with the child on his lap. “What question?”

“Who’s Miwi’s mummy?”

“Ah, Dorian, why do you ask?”

“Because I have a mummy, and Uncle Hawy and Uncle Sevwus. Everyone has a mummy. Who’s Miwi’s?”

Bill smiled and toyed with the dark curls. “Okay, this is payback. I made Solarin handle the questions alone before, now she’s telling me I have to handle this one on my own,” Bill said with a smile.

“What’s she telling you to say?” Harry asked.

“She’s telling me to be diplomatic. Any ideas on how to answer this?”

Harry smiled and held out his arms for Dorian, who crawled across the duvet into Harry’s arms, dragging the dragon toy by its tail.

“Okay. Dorian, you know how your mummy is a girl?” Harry questioned and Dorian nodded. “And you know how your daddy is a boy?” Another nod. “Well, only girls can have babies. See, girls have special body parts that mean they can make a baby. Do you understand?”

“Uh-huh. Like mummy has boobies.”

The three men stifled their laughs. “Yeah, kind of like that. See, the body parts girls have to make babies are inside, where you can’t see them.”

“Like your heart?”

“Just like that. They’re all inside their tummies,” Harry said and then paused, making sure the little boy wasn’t lost along the way. “Okay. Now, me, I’m a special kind of boy. I have girl body parts as well as boy body parts. Now, you know that a baby grows inside their mummy right?”

“Uh-huh. In the giwl pawts in theiw tummies, that’s why theiw bellies get weal big.”

Harry sniggered. “That’s right. Well, I’m Miri’s mummy. Miri grew in my belly.”

“But Miwi doesn’t call you mummy.”

“No, she calls me carrier, because I still look like a boy.”

“You look like a daddy.”

“Exactly. But Miri would get very confused if she called me and Severus daddy. So she calls Severus daddy and me carrier. Did that answer your question?”

“Yup. Thank you, Uncle Hawy.”

“You’re very welcome. Now, how about you go with your daddy and get dressed so you can go down to breakfast?”

Dorian nodded and let Bill scoop him up, the redhead offering his thanks as he left the room.

Harry dissolved into a fit of giggles as Severus sniggered. “I am very impressed,” Severus said. “Nicely handled.”

“Why thank you, I am rather proud of myself for that one,” Harry said, kissing Severus before slipping from the bed.

They moved to Miri’s room and Harry scooped the tiny girl up. “What do you say we try Miri on the baby cereals again?”

“Can’t hurt,” Severus said. “If she refuses again, we’ll keep her on the nursing for a bit longer. I’ll dress her while you get dressed, love.”

Ten minutes later the three of them moved to the kitchen, where Dorian was happily reeling off who Miri’s mother was to Remus. Harry slipped Miri into her highchair and Severus fixed the baby porridge, handing it to Harry before excusing himself to add some much needed components to some potions in the lab.

This was a common occurrence, Severus disappearing at random moments to save a potion from ruin. He now had a steady stream of customers, each with their own demands from the Potions Master. Severus was considered the best potions brewer in the country, it was no surprise that St Mungo’s had recently taken him on to brew some medicinal salves for them. Severus had surmised that it was a trial run, and if he did well, he could probably expect larger orders from the hospital for much more complicated potions.

Harry was relieved to find Miri ate her breakfast without complaint. The weaning was getting much easier, and soon she would not need to be breast fed, which Harry was looking forward to. It was easier to feed her solids, less chance of questions from Dorian on why Miri was suckling at him.

Sirius smiled at Harry happily feeding his daughter and glanced at Remus and Dorian before slipping silently from the room and down to the basement lab. He knocked and identified himself before sliding inside the stifling room.

“Something I can help you with?” Severus asked, his eyes fixed on the potion he was working on. 

“Me and Remus were just wondering how Harry was handling it,” Sirius said.

Severus added the willow bark to the potion and adjusted the flame before looking up at the man in confusion. “Forgive me, but I have no idea what you are talking about. How is Harry handling what?”

“Today, how’s he handling today?” Sirius clarified and still Severus looked confused. “You did realise today was Halloween, right?”

Severus’ jaw dropped. “No, I didn’t, and I don’t think Harry has either,” Severus said. “How was he when you left him?”

“Happily feeding Miri.”

Severus briefly took in the fact that Sirius had said feeding and not nursing, alluding to the fact that Miri had accepted solids for breakfast, before he focussed on the present situation. As far as he knew, Harry had never had a problem with Halloween before, but this year was different. After what Harry had been through, he was constantly seeking comfort, safety. And what person didn’t crave their mother when things were scary? Severus was well aware that this year, Halloween could be a very difficult day for Harry. It would be impossible for Harry to remain unaware of what day it was, and it would be foolish of Severus to believe he could keep his lover in the dark.

“I’ll talk to him,” Severus said eventually, after many moments of silent deliberation. “Don’t mention it yet, and if anyone else tries to, stop them. I need to add a few more components to this piece, I shall be up shortly. Keep him occupied until then.”

Sirius nodded and made his way back upstairs.

“Look, Sirius, she ate the whole lot,” Harry cried excitedly as he entered the kitchen. Sirius chuckled. ‘Ate’ was a misnomer. Wore was a better description of it. Miri had half her breakfast smeared down her front.

“You mean she ate what she isn’t playing with,” Sirius said as Miri patted her sticky shirt.

“At least she ate some of it,” Harry said.

Sirius held up his hands, grinning. “Okay, I give in. She ate breakfast, it’s a miracle.”

Harry beamed and moved to clean up the tiny girl and the mess she had made. Remus looked at his husband and Sirius gave a small shake of his head. Remus nodded and watched Harry out of the corner of his eye as Dorian continued to babble at him.

“…and Uncle Hawy told me that’s how he’s Miwi’s mummy,” Dorian said.

“Right, little man, how about some breakfast now you’ve finished telling Uncle Remus your new information?” Solarin asked as she scooped him out of Remus’ lap.

“Okay.”

“What do you want? Pancakes? Waffles? Cereal?”

“Toast,” Dorian said and the room froze, every eye on Harry.

Harry stared at the little boy. Dorian did not know anything of what had happened to Harry, it was no wonder he was unaware of his lingering quirk. But, strangely, Harry wasn’t having a panic over the mention of the food. He wasn’t even a little thrown by it.

“My goodness, Sirius Lupin-Black, silent for once in his life. Miracles do happen,” Severus said as he entered. He crossed to Harry and kissed him before looking around properly. “Why is everyone silent?”

“Dorian wants toast for breakfast,” Harry said as he calmly carried Miri’s bowl to the sink. 

“And how do you feel about that, love?”

Harry smiled. “Fine, I feel fine.”

Severus pulled him into his arms. “Honestly?” he murmured.

Harry kissed him softly. “Honestly. I feel okay about it. I say, let him have it.”

Severus nodded at Solarin and decided to wait until Dorian had finished his breakfast before informing Harry of the date. He saw no sense in pushing his luck.

“Would you like some, Harry? See how you do with it?” Solarin questioned as she slid two slices of bread under the grill.

“Let’s not push it,” Harry said. 

Severus watched Harry as Dorian ate his toast, waiting for any sign of Harry’s panic. He wasn’t the only one, most of the people in the room were watching him. 

Harry, for his part, ignored the stares and the fact of being watched, busying himself by playing with Miri, tickling her with her green dragon in between bites of his own breakfast of crumpets. He allowed their stares, it was only natural that they would be apprehensive of this experience.

As Solarin whisked the plate away from Dorian, Severus leaned in to Harry. “How are you doing, love?”

“I’m okay, but why is everyone looking so worried? I haven’t panicked,” Harry said.

“Well, they are worried because of what today is.”

“What do you mean? It’s Thursday, why would they be worried? I know I have a few problems in Potions, but it’s been a while since I blew anything up.”

Severus chuckled at the simplicity of Harry’s thinking. “Harry, today is Halloween.”

Harry want absolutely still as the words hit him. Halloween, the sixteenth anniversary of his parents deaths. No wonder they looked so worried.

“I didn’t realise,” Harry mumbled. “Do you think everyone would mind if we kind of forgot what today was, just pretended it was a regular day?”

“Of course, if that’s what you want.”

“It is. It’s not that I want to dishonour my parents or anything like that, I just don’t want to be reminded of the fact that they aren’t here, not this year,” Harry explained.

“You could never dishonour them, pup,” Remus said, making Harry jump slightly. Harry had obviously forgotten that he and Severus were not alone. “If you like, we could celebrate something else.”

“Like what?”

“Me and Sirius first got together on Halloween, twenty one years ago,” Remus revealed. “We could celebrate that, if you like.”

Harry nodded and the conversation changed to Hogwarts, more specifically, Solarin and Bill’s days as students.

“She was a hellion,” Severus said as Bill pulled on his work robes, Dorian clinging to his shin in an attempt to make him stay home.

It was another common occurrence in the house. Dorian was so afraid that his new family would leave him, he kicked up merry hell whenever one of them tried to go out without him. So far, they hadn’t tried having Solarin go anywhere without Dorian, and they were in no rush to attempt it either. It was bad enough to listen to his sobs the one time she had fallen asleep in the bath and Dorian couldn’t talk to her through the connection.

“Dorian, daddy has to go to work,” Solarin said, pulling him off Bill’s leg, before looking at her brother. “What was life without a little excitement? It was Hogwarts, and Harry’s years were much more eventful than mine.”

Harry dropped the apple he had just reached for. “Hang on, I just did some quick math in my head. Weren’t you at Hogwarts when I was?”

She grinned. “Yes, I was. I was in my seventh year when you were in your first,” she confirmed.

“How come I never saw you?”

She laughed. “Come on, Harry! Think about it! I was a Slytherin seventh year doing my N.E.W.T.’s and you were a Gryffindor first year getting into scrapes with Draco. We didn’t exactly run in the same circles. Name me one Gryffindor seventh year you remember from your first year.”

Harry grinned sheepishly. “Good point. So, how many N.E.W.T.’s did you get?”

“That’s not important,” she said evasively, kissing Bill as he flooed out. 

“Severus, how many did you get?” Harry asked.

“I achieved ten Outstanding’s, and two Exceeds Expectations. Thankfully, I did not loose my touch on any others, or I would not be a Potions Master,” Severus replied immediately, taking a sip of coffee.

“What do you mean?”

“To become a Potions Master, I was required to demonstrate the intelligence to create a potion of my own, one previously undiscovered. Thus, I created the Wolfsbane Potion. Remus was my test subject.”

“Oh, some of those earlier versions were nasty,” Remus said, shuddering as he remembered. “More than once I found myself puking it up again, and then if it did stay down, I felt decidedly green.”

Harry grinned. “That’s all you had to do to become a Potions Master?”

“No, there was more. I had to achieve Outstanding Potions, Herbology, Transfiguration, Charms, History of Magic and Defence Against The Dark Arts N.E.W.T.’s, demonstrate the ability to create thirty potions unassisted from scratch, and demonstrate the creation of my signature potion. I addition, I had to submit written application for the position, and a fourty foot parchment essay on the uses, importance and requirements of potions.”

Harry gaped. Okay, that was one career he could cross of his list. All that, just to become a Potions Master? And then, of course, he would have to remain on top of all the advancements made in Potions, all the new discoveries, constantly inventing better ways to achieve perfect results. He had seen Severus do it, the way he was constantly checking Potions Periodical or Practical Brewer, magazines he had delivered every single Monday morning, for new advancements, new ways to improve this potion or that potion. Harry just didn’t love the subject enough to commit that much time, effort and energy to it, especially not for the rest of his life.

“Note to self, dedicated husband was insane in his teens,” Harry joked, making Severus roll his eyes. “What did you get the Exceeds Expectations in?”

“Astronomy and Ancient Runes. They never were my best subjects.”

“Still, very impressive marks, for a Slytherin,” Sirius said with a smile.

“What about you, Sirius? How many did you get?”

“Nine O’s, three E’s. Though, I was most proud of my O in Muggle Studies. I worked hard for that one. Remus’ dad, John, and his Uncle Joe let me loose in their garage in the holidays. I got to fix cars, which helped.”

“And I got let off the hook,” Remus said, clinking his mug with Sirius’. “I used to hate it. I can’t fix cars to save my life, but Uncle Joe was convinced that one day this latent talent would emerge. I ruined more car parts than I ever fixed, even managed to make a whole engine explode once, but he wouldn’t give in. When Sirius came to live with us at sixteen, I was over the moon. He took over in the garage, and I was free at long last.”

Harry was laughing at the mental picture of a teenage Remus making a car explode. “Your dad was a mechanic?”

“Yup. My father and my Uncle Joe opened a garage together long before I was even born. After dad passed away, Joe got a young bloke in to help out. Then there’s my Uncle Mike, who owns his own construction business now. Used to be a carpenter but he went up in the world. Wonderful at Scrabble, makes up his own words to win. My Uncle Chris runs a fish and chip shop called The Happy Scampi. You can tell when he’s been at his own stock because his trousers become two sizes too small. And my Uncle Jim runs a pub called The Shamrock, where I spent my misspent youth fleecing most of the estates residents out of money. Jim was determined to teach me how to win money in a pub. I’m very good at it.”

Harry was in peels of laughter imagining all of Remus’ relatives. Anne had returned to her muggle house a few days ago, and had issued them with the strict command that she wanted to be kept informed of everything, and not wait until something went wrong for them to call her. It was odd without her, Harry decided, but she had promised to visit again soon, and she would be round for dinner quite often, with Jack.

“What about your N.E.W.T.’s, Remus, how did you do?” Harry asked as he caught his breath.

“I did very well, ten O’s, two E’s.”

“Come on, Sol, how did you do? Did you fail them all?” Phoenix asked, earning a snort of amusement from Severus.

“You may as well tell them,” the elder Snape sibling advised. “They won’t give up until you do.”

Solarin sighed and leaned against the counter, glancing over at Dorian, who was busy making pastry for an apple pie with Molly. “Fine, fine,” she grumbled. “Fourteen.”

“Excuse me?” Remus said.

“I got fourteen Outstanding’s. I did two more than you’re supposed to be allowed to do because of what I am. There, satisfied now?” she said embarrassedly.

“Please, can we not tell Hermione?” Harry begged. “She nearly killed herself in third year with all those subjects. If she finds out about Sol doing fourteen N.E.W.T.’s she’ll never stop.”

“Speaking of subjects, Harry and Nixie, Potions in ten minutes,” Severus said.

“What are we doing today?” Phoenix asked, actually eating her breakfast now she knew there was a time limit. She had been trying to construct a house out of fruit.

“Felix Felicis, I think, or maybe Polyjuice. Any preference?” Severus said with a smirk at his blushing spouse.

“Polyjuice? The one that changes you into someone else for an hour?” Phoenix asked.

“The very same. Harry, perhaps you know some of the ingredients used in Polyjuice?”

Harry sniggered guiltily and most looked confused, all except Severus, Remus and Sirius, who were grinning.

“Boomslang skin, Bicorn horn, lacewing flies, leeches, fluxweed, and knotgrass come to mind,” Harry said. “It takes a month to brew.”

“How did you know that? You haven’t even studied it yet,” Solarin said.

“I’ll be in the garden getting the fluxweed. It’s better to use fresh rather than dried,” Harry said, popping up from his chair, and Severus let him go.

“Hermione constructed that potion in their second year. They were convinced Draco was the Heir of Slytherin,” Severus said. “Harry let off a firework into a cauldron of Swelling Solution to distract me in order for Hermione to get the Boomslang skin and Bicorn horn.”

“They were second years?” Solarin questioned, obviously impressed.

“Yup,” Sirius said. “Believe me, Sol, some of the things Harry, Ron and Hermione got up to could make your toes curl.”

“That I don’t doubt for a second. Okay, do I have any volunteers?”

“For what?” Molly asked.

“The grocery shopping. Me and Dorian are going, do I have any takers to come with us?”

“I’ll come,” Sirius said.

Remus sniggered. “You only want to go because you spent so long hiding. You should have seen it. The day after his name was cleared, it took him a full hour to go get some milk,” Remus said.

“Why?” Charlie asked as he piled up plates.

“Because I could,” Sirius said. “I was in Azkaban for twelve years, and on the run for two. It was nice just to walk down the street on two legs.”

They all shared a laugh before Sirius and Solarin took a tiny hand each and called their goodbyes, the three raven haired beings disappearing out the front door. 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Severus wandered down to the lab to find Harry and discovered it was empty. He checked the garden but came up with no sign of his husband. He slowly worked his way through the house, checking rooms as he went, until he eventually found Harry in the attic, hidden behind a tower of boxes.

“Harry?”

Harry wiped at his face, trying to hide his tears, but it was too late, Severus had seen them. Harry found himself gathered into his lovers warm embrace, Severus smoothing his hair and rocking him.

“What’s brought this on, hmmm?” Severus asked softly. “Come on, love, tell me what’s got you so worked up.”

Harry sniffed and felt incredibly stupid. “I don’t know. I just don’t feel very good.”

“Ah, I see. Just a bad day, hmmm?” Harry nodded. “All right, Harry, it’s all right. We’ve done this before, remember? This is why you’re home schooled. We have the routine so you can have your bad days in peace. How about we cancel lessons for today and we just spend the day together?”

“Thank you, Severus,” Harry said and then dissolved into another bout of tears, burying his face in Severus’ chest.

They had indeed been through this before, Harry sobbing for no apparent reason. There were no triggers for these bad days, nothing to set them off. Harry would usually start off the day in a perfectly good mood, but then suddenly his tears would take over. These bad days would be spent with the two of them curled up, Harry taking comfort in the fact that his husband was right there with him. 

Severus pulled him closer and slowly tried to soothe him, rocking him and rubbing his back, murmuring calming nonsense. 

Severus looked up to see Remus poking his head through the trap door. “Is everything all right?” the werewolf asked.

“Not really,” Severus said as Remus hoisted himself up into the attic, taking a seat on a discarded armchair. “Harry’s having a bad day. You should tell Nixie that lessons will be cancelled for today.”

Remus nodded and peered at Harry with kind eyes. “Is there anything I can do, pup?”

“Look after Miri for me? I’ll come and give her lunch, I just need some time alone,” Harry said quietly.

“Of course, pup. Don’t fret, she’s safe with us. Anything else you need?” Harry shook his head and Remus nodded, offering a small smile before he disappeared again, leaving Severus to handle it.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

“Of course it bloody hurts, you just had a needle stuck through it!”

Remus looked up to find Solarin laughing, Dorian in her arms, and a pained looking Sirius levitating in the groceries, which Molly took for him.

“Why are you watching Miri? Where’s Harry?” Solarin asked Remus as she turned around.

Remus was sitting with the little girl on his lap, the two of them amusing themselves with rattles and cuddly toys, Miri gurgling contentedly as Remus pressed buttons on a musical box, Smoo clutched in her tiny hands.

“He has Potions this morning,” Sirius replied, and Remus was puzzled by the lisp.

“No, lessons were cancelled,” Phoenix said, looking up from her colouring book. “Harry’s having a bad day. Why are you lisping, dad?”

“My question exactly,” Remus said. “Do I want to know what you had a needle stuck through?”

Sirius grinned sheepishly and, after a moment, stuck out his tongue. Through it was a shiny steel bolt.

“What on earth have you done to yourself?” Molly shrieked as Remus grinned.

“What do you think?” Sirius asked. “Good, right?”

“Did you have something to do with this?” Molly questioned Solarin, and the dark haired witch held up her hands.

“Absolutely not. I’m the one who tried to persuade him not to do it, but he insisted, so I at least ensured he got it done in a proper tattoo parlour. I made sure everything was sterile before I gave up trying to stop him,” Solarin said. “I took him to the same place I got my nose done, and my tattoo.” She giggled. “You should have heard him scream, it was priceless.”

“It bloody hurt,” Sirius defended.

“Uncle Siwius was weally loud, Uncle Wemus,” Dorian put in and Remus smiled at him.

“I’ll bet he was,” the werewolf said as Sirius sat down next to him. “Just out of interest, why did you let someone put a bolt through your tongue?”

“Because I wanted to. And just imagine how it feels on your skin,” Sirius said, waggling his eyebrows.

“What’s the stud made out of?”

“Stainless steel.”

“Let me see it again.”

Sirius obediently stuck out his tongue and Remus gingerly poked the silver coloured ball, making Sirius wince. “It’s still sore,” Sirius said. 

“So it should be,” Solarin said, handing him a cup of ice cubes. “Suck on those, it’ll help. Be thankful I talked you out of the tattoo.”

“Tattoo?” Molly said. “Sirius, you are insane.”

“Hey, your daughter-in-law has a tattoo,” Sirius said thickly through a mouthful of ice. “Solarin has a nose ring too. I don’t see you berating her for it.”

“No, that is my job,” Severus said as he walked in, Harry clinging to him. He took a seat and Harry hovered near him, deciding if he wanted to sit down or run from the room. “Why are we discussing disgusting body modifications?”

“Sirius put a bolt through his tongue,” Molly said. “The idiot let some butcher put a hole where there isn’t meant to be one.”

Solarin rolled her eyes and looked at Severus, the two of them grinning. “Who knew the two of you would share so many views, Molly,” she said. 

“Lets see,” Harry said quietly and Sirius swallowed his ice before sticking out his tongue. “Nice. I like it.”

“At least my son has taste,” Sirius said.

“So, why did she talk you out of the tattoo?” Phoenix asked.

“Remus removed my Azkaban marks without even asking. I can just see him taking a tattoo well, can’t you?” Sirius joked. “I learnt a long time ago that no one marks me but Remus. It’s a whole wolf territory thing.” He looked at Remus. “Do you like it, honey?”

“It can stay, but no tattoos,” Remus said and Sirius punched the air triumphantly.

“Told you he’d like it,” the Animagus said smugly to Solarin. “I still can’t believe you didn’t scream.”

“Why would Solarin scream?” Severus asked suspiciously and she grinned. “Oh, Merlin. What now? What did you have done?” She shrugged and he peered at her. “Tattoo or piercing?”

“Both,” she said.

Severus groaned. “Where is the piercing? Can you at least show it in polite company?”

“Of course I can,” she said, poking out her tongue. Through it was a piercing identical to Sirius’, though her high pain threshold enabled her to talk without a lisp.

“And the tattoo? Can you show people that one without taking off any clothes?”

She turned around and lifted the bottom of her shirt, exposing the plaster over her lower spine. “That has to stay on for the next day or so,” she said.

“What’s the tattoo of?” Remus asked. 

“Me!” Dorian cried excitedly. “Mummy let me choose it.”

“What did you choose, Dor?” Harry asked as he finally took a seat, settling himself on Severus’ lap, the long slim arms coming around him.

“An angel,” Dorian said proudly. “And it has my name undew it.”

“It’ll show it when the dressing comes off,” Solarin said.

“Does Bill know about them yet?” Molly enquired.

“Not yet. He should like the tattoo, it’s the first part of a whole back piece. I’m having several angels, with clouds, done.”

They talked about the new body modifications until a crack of Apperation from the hallway made Harry jump and drop his glass. It shattered all over the table and Harry burst into tears. Solarin chucked a cloth at Sirius and made her way over to the sobbing Gryffindor.

“Hey, it’s all right, Harry, it’s okay,” she soothed as Severus rocked him. “It’s only juice, it can be cleaned up.”

“But I didn’t mean to drop it,” Harry sniffled.

“I know. I know that right now you feel like you can’t do anything right. That’s just not true. But, you know what? It’s okay for you to have bad days. We all have bad days, it’s okay for you to feel like this.”

Harry nodded at her and she smoothed his hair before she looked toward the doorway. Standing there was Albus, with someone Solarin immediately had the urge to decapitate.

“Oh, no! No way, he leaves, right now!” Solarin yelled.

“Solarin, please listen before you fly off the handle,” Albus said and she huffed.

“Fine. Phoenix, take Dorian upstairs, please,” Solarin said stiffly, and Phoenix did as she was told before Albus and his two companions entered the room.

“Percy!” Molly shrieked.

Severus glanced at his sister and wondered how Percy was still living. She was glaring daggers at him.

“Severus?” Harry mumbled.

“Yes, love?”

“Why is Sol so angry at Percy?”

“They had an argument shortly before she graduated from Hogwarts. He said some very nasty things to her,” Severus said delicately.

Molly restrained herself from rushing forwards and hugging her son, but no one failed to notice the sudden light in her eyes. Harry wasn’t sure if the other Weasley’s would be so forgiving. He wasn’t sure if he himself could forgive Percy for calling him a liar. He wasn’t sure if anyone could forgive him.

Sirius wasted no time in calling the other members of the house home, and it was a very tense room when Arthur arrived. Percy and his father stood at opposite ends of the room, and peered at each other.

“Is no one going to say anything?” 

Harry looked to the doorway and noticed that Fleur Delacour was standing next to Albus, looking around at all the angry faces with wonder.

“Hi, Fleur,” Harry said and she smiled at him. Strangely, her Veela genetics were having no affect on him. Odd. She had affected him last time.

“ ‘Arry!” she cried, moving towards him, her French accent as strong as ever. 

As she came to his seat, she reached out to embrace him. It was the wrong thing to do. A blonde trying to hug him did not sit well with Harry. He recoiled, falling out of Severus lap and to the floor, scrabbling to his feet and bolting from the room. Severus disappeared and returned a moment later.

“He needs time alone,” Severus said delicately and they all nodded in understanding. Well, almost all.

Percy looked genuinely distraught at Harry’s behaviour, and Fleur looked ready to burst into tears.

“It’s true then? What Malfoy said to us, it’s true?” Percy said.

“What did he say?” Charlie spat. “Did he tell you that Harry was his property first, that he would do what it takes to get him back? Or perhaps he referred to Harry as his whore? Tell me, Percy, did he raise his fists to you? Did he attack you in your own office, like he did to me and Bill? Did he burn down your home with you still inside, like he did to mum and dad? Tell us, oh brother dearest, what atrocities he said and did to you, because you look absolutely fine to me.”

The floo sprang to life and Bill stepped through, hurrying over to Solarin immediately. “What is it, what’s wrong?” he asked breathlessly.

She motioned to Percy. “That is what’s wrong,” she snarled. 

“How about we all take a deep breath and calm down?” Severus suggested. “Sit down everyone, and we will behave like adults and discuss this rationally.” They all took seats, and Percy found himself with an end all to himself. Even Fleur had chosen to sit next to Severus a few seats down. “Now, we shall begin with what Percy and Fleur are doing here. Albus?”

Albus cleared his throat. “Lucius has struck again. He cornered Percy and Fleur in the Ministry itself. Fleur was bringing Percy some brunch.”

“The two of you are dating?” Molly asked.

“Yes, mum, we are. Have been for a year, ever since she began working at the Ministry to improve her English,” Percy said.

“Fortunately, they raised the alarm before he could actually do them any damage. Unfortunately, he has escaped once more,” Albus said, redirecting the conversation. He glanced at Solarin. “The Minister asked me to put the two of them wherever it is that I am hiding the rest of you.”

“Not a word,” Severus said firmly as Solarin opened her mouth, looking indignant. She shot him a dirty look and made a rude hand gesture at him but remained silent. “Percy, what did Lucius say to you? Charlie is right, we all wish to know what you are aware of.”

Percy looked more uncomfortable than anyone could ever remember seeing him, and he stared at the table as he spoke. “He told us that…er…well, he said…he…ummm…”

“Word for word,” Severus said when Percy drifted off.

Percy took a deep breath to steady himself. “He said that he fucked Harry six ways from Sunday and that Harry liked it, that he begged for more. That Harry’s little bastard bitch was his, that you had no right to touch Harry, that Harry was his, and Harry’s baby, though she wasn’t much use to him now. He said he would do what it took to get Harry back, and this time he’d get it right,” Percy reeled off. “He said we were going to be a message to all of you, that our corpses would remind you of what he was capable. We rang the alarm at that point.”

Severus took a deep breath to calm his temper. “No one utters a single word of this to Harry, not one word.”

“Of course not,” Remus said, cuddling Miri closer. “He’s come so far, let’s not set him back.”

“Could someone please stand by the door and let us know if he comes down so we can end the conversation? I do not want him hearing any of this,” Severus requested and Fleur moved to watch for the sprite. Severus pushed his temper down. This was not Percy’s fault, he was not to be blamed for what he had told them. But how Severus wanted to hurt him, he couldn’t put into words. 

“Drink this,” Arthur ordered as he pushed a brandy into Severus’ hand, and the dark haired wizard downed it in one before nodding his thanks.

“First off, let me make it perfectly clear that whatever Lucius has done to my husband, Harry did not ask for it, he did not enjoy it, and he certainly didn’t beg for more. He begged for it to end,” Severus said tensely to the redhead, who nodded. “Secondly, the seed for my daughter may have been provided by that sadistic son of a bitch but she is mine, mine and Harry’s, and Lucius will never come near either of them, not while I still have breath left in my body will he lay a hand on either of them.” Severus looked up to find Sirius’ hand on his shoulder, reminding him to stay calm. He nodded and looked at Percy once more. “Harry will not be going back to Lucius Malfoy. No way. Never. He is mine, and I will not let that prick have him.”

Percy nodded. “You asked what he said, I was only telling you. Is it true then, what the Prophet said? Is Harry really a hermaphrodite?” he asked.

“Yes, he is,” Remus said. “Keep in mind, he sees himself as male, so please refer to him as such.”

“Of course.” Percy hesitated. “How long did Malfoy have him?”

“Five months,” Sirius said. “We don’t talk about it, not unless Harry starts the conversation on that topic. We don’t use the word legend around Harry, or master. No toast, no marmalade. Oh, and Harry is very nervous about people touching him, you have to have him touch you first, or he panics, like he did to Fleur.”

“‘E is coming,” Fleur said. Severus leapt from his seat and made his way out into the hallway.

“Harry, I need you to go upstairs, love,” he said quietly as Harry reached him, falling into his arms for a hug. 

“Why?”

“Because you will not handle this conversation, love, trust me on this.”

“But it’s time for Miri’s lunch. Let me feed her and then I will go upstairs, I promise.”

Severus smiled. No matter how bad Harry was feeling, he would not leave the feeding of their daughter to someone else. Severus wasn’t even sure if Miri would accept food from someone else. Severus swooped in for a swift kiss before he nodded. The two of them made their way to the kitchen.

“We will break for lunch, and resume this conversation later,” Severus said and Percy rose to his feet help.

“Not you,” Arthur said firmly. “You will not help until after we get some apologies from you. Just sit there and try not to upset anyone.”

Percy sat back down and kept this mouth shut. Fleur, however, happily made conversation with Solarin over lunch. As promised, Harry fed Miri, ate his own lunch and then disappeared upstairs with his daughter.

They resumed their seats and it was Arthur who led the conversation this time.

“Are you here because you want to be, or because you have no choice?” the Weasley patriarch said.

“Both,” Percy said. “I meant to come sooner, but I wasn’t sure of my welcome. I didn’t know what to say, how to apologise.”

“Easy, it’s a five letter word beginning with ‘s’. Even an idiotic Gryffindor like you should be able to figure that one out,” Solarin snapped before anyone could stop her, and Sirius choked on his latest ice cube.

“You’re not helping,” Percy said.

“Like you need my help. Isn’t that what you said? That you didn’t need my help?”

“Yes, I did say that, but-”

“Why expect my help when you specifically asked me to keep my dirty Death Eater nose out of it?”

Percy gaped at her and then snapped his mouth shut.

“Stop picking on him,” Molly scolded.

“She’s not, mum,” Bill said. “She’s simply reminding him of what to apologise to her for. If he found it that difficult to apologise, maybe he needs reminding of what he did wrong.”

“He’s right,” Percy said quietly. “She’s simply reminding me of what I did, of what my temper and my tongue cost me. My family, my friendships with Harry and Solarin, getting to see Bill finally marry someone. Everything. I never should have said any of the things I did.” He looked at Arthur. “I’m sorry, dad. I didn’t mean it. You’re not the reason I was held back, our lack of money wasn’t your fault. It was the bigoted Ministry, and I should have realized that. I’m sorry.”

Arthur stared at him for a moment before he nodded. 

Percy looked at his brothers. “If you want to pummel me, I won’t stop you,” he said quietly.

Bill and Charlie looked at each other before sharing a grin. “Where’s the fun in that?” Bill said.

“Yeah, it’s no fun if you don’t fight back,” Charlie agreed. “We’ll just leave it to the twins to think up some appropriate punishments for you. Their creativity should be encouraged after all.”

Percy actually managed a shaky smiled before he looked at Severus. “I’m guessing it’s not the right time to apologise to Harry.”

“Definitely not,” Severus said, half laughing. “Not today. Trust me, he’ll let you know when your moment has come.”

Percy nodded and turned his gaze on Solarin. She stared at him, as if challenging him to try and apologise to her. “I’m sorry?” he tried timidly and she snorted.

“Pathetic,” she said. “Absolutely pathetic. Come on, Percy, you called me a two-knut Knockturn Alley whore. I deserve more than just ‘I’m sorry’.”

“Good point. I’m really sorry?”

“Not even close.” She stood up and walked to the door. “I’m going to check on my son. When you figure out what it is you should be saying, then you get an audience.”

She swept from the room and Percy buried his face in his hands. “She hates me,” he said, his voice muffled, and Bill dissolved into a fit of laughter. 

“She doesn’t hate you, Percy. She’s testing you, seeing if you’re good enough to be forgiven,” Bill said. “I suggest grovelling, or maybe offering her your life. But, I would give her a few days to cool down.”

“Yeah, count yourself lucky,” Sirius said with a shudder. “She could have killed you right then and there.”

Remus smirked. “And gotten away with it.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Harry shook with nerves as they left the Hogwarts Express. 

It was Friday afternoon and he was due to play for Gryffindor tomorrow morning. The train ride had been fun, especially since he and his family had the whole train to themselves. Anne, Jack, Sam, Tonks, Fred and George had all made the trip with them, and the journey had been spent sharing stories as they all crammed into one enlarged compartment. Arthur and Bill had even taken the day off work so they could ride the train. 

But now Harry was faced with the prospect of returning to Hogwarts, being surrounded by many people. He was nervous, but not panicking.

Their belongings were loaded into thestral drawn carriages and then they were trundling along, slowly making their way up to the castle.

“How are you doing, love?” Severus asked quietly.

“It feels weird to be back here. It’s been so long since I’ve seen the castle,” Harry said, gazing up at the nearing turrets. “Hogwarts was my first real home, you know.”

“Really?” Tonks questioned from across the carriage. “What about your Aunt and Uncle?”

Harry laughed. “They hate me! Privet Drive was never a real home, not like here, not like Number Twelve.”

“I can understand how he feels,” Sam said. “I haven’t been back here since my first year. Feels weird to be back.”

They pulled up outside the front doors to find Albus waiting for them. They unloaded their belongings and sorted the ones they needed now, like baby bags, from the other luggage, before they followed the Headmaster into the castle. It was quiet, the students still in lessons.

Albus showed them to their rooms, which were all interconnected, before he asked them where they wanted to eat dinner. They had the choice between their rooms, the kitchens, or the Great Hall, and even then they had the choice of whether to sit with the students or at the Head Table. They opted to eat in the Great Hall, but the actual seating arrangements left some discussion still required.

Dinner rolled around and the odd family made their way to the Great Hall. Harry held Miri more securely as he paused briefly just outside the doors. A deep breath later and he was walking to the Gryffindor table. Ron and Hermione looked up and their identical shrieks made Harry forget that he was being watched by every eye in the room. 

The young Weasley couple practically ran over and bestowed Harry a quick hug before relieving Arthur and Molly of their children. Harry grinned as they all stood there, trying to decide where to sit.

“I told you, I sit with Gryffindor’s all day every day,” Solarin said to Bill. “You come and sit with Slytherin’s for a change.”

“I’m married to a Slytherin, isn’t that enough?” Bill countered and she glared at him. “Arin, look at them. Do they look like your kind of Slytherin’s?”

She looked over and grimaced. “Good point. Well, we have to sit somewhere.”

Harry left them to it and made his way over to the Gryffindor table, Dean and Seamus sliding up for Harry to settle between them. 

Unknown to Harry, his friends had made plans to protect him while he was in the castle. These plans had come about when Neville had overheard Pansy and some other Slytherin’s discussing how to ‘upset’ Harry. To this effect, the Gryffindor’s, Ravenclaw’s and Hufflepuff’s had all banded together to protect the fragile Gryffindor. 

Severus lingered long enough to ensure Harry was all right before he moved away, taking a seat at the Head Table. Sirius and Remus chose to sit at the Gryffindor table, as did Sam, Tonks, Fred and George. 

As Harry settled Miri and began to feed her, Bill made his way over with Dorian. 

“What happened?” Fred asked.

“I asserted myself,” Bill said, Neville helping him seat Dorian on a thick book.

“Translation?” Seamus said.

“They had a debate and Bill lost, so she’s gone to sit with Severus and he has to take care of Dorian for the rest of the night,” Tonks said, motioning to the Head Table where Solarin was settling next to her brother and shooting angry glances at Bill.

Phoenix joined them with Charlie, and Percy hovered uncertainly until Harry told him to sit down. Fleur joined them and soon Luna drifted over to sit with Neville.

“Harry, when she’s finished eating, can I hold Miri?” Neville requested.

“Of course,” Harry said, trying to get Miri to eat. It was proving difficult, as there was so much for her to see, and so many minds for her to glance into. Harry sighed as she looked at the Slytherin table, waving her fists in sudden aggravation. “Miri,” he said firmly, getting her attention. “No, baby. No look, no see.” She went still for a moment before she gurgled at him. “Good girl.”

As the meal progressed, and Harry handed Miri across the table to Neville so he could actually eat, the conversation turned to something Harry had completely missed during his time as a resident student.

“What on earth is the Hogwarts Stud?” Harry asked and Sirius shared a grin with Remus.

“The Hogwarts Stud and the Hogwarts Slut are institutions in this place,” Remus said. “They are two boys who hold distinct reputations as heartbreakers in the school. The difference between the two is that the Slut is open about his conquests, but the Stud is built on rumour. With the Stud, no one is ever sure who he’s slept with, who he hasn’t slept with, how many he’s had. It’s all about rumour.”

“Oh, I get it,” Harry said between mouthfuls of stew. “Who’s the Stud now?”

“Seamus,” Dean said. “Has been since sixth year.”

“And the Slut?”

“Barnaby of Slytherin.”

Harry grinned. “Remus, who was it in your day?”

Remus sniggered. “It was me,” Sirius said. “I was the Stud. When I retired my crown, so to speak, I passed it to Regulus, my brother.”

“You retired from being the Stud?” Seamus asked.

“Yup.”

“Why?” he asked, shocked that someone would do such a thing.

“I settled down with Remus. He was my one and only, and I liked it that way, still do,” Sirius said. He laughed. “You probably won’t believe me, but I’ve never actually been with anyone except Remus.”

“No way!” Dean said. “No one?”

“Nope,” Remus said. “He’s all mine, always has been, always will be.”

“Now that is impressive,” Charlie said.

“What about the Slut, who was the Slut during your time here?” Ron asked.

Remus snorted.

“Let me guess,” Harry said. “Lucius?”

“Exactly, Lucius was the Slut,” Remus said. “Oh, he was so mad about Sirius being the Stud. He wanted the title since he started, and it only took Sirius a few weeks to get it. He tried, obviously, which is how he ended up the Slut. He never grasped that it was all about rumour, he kept bragging about his conquests.”

Harry was laughing at the mental image of Lucius being snubbed by a tiny first year Sirius. He knew, from stories, that Lucius had been in his fifth year when the Marauders started at Hogwarts. It must have pissed Lucius off no end.

“What about your time here, Charlie? Who was the Stud then?” Phoenix asked.

“I forget his name,” Charlie said. “Bill, what was his name? Tall guy, mixed race, smouldering good looks.”

“Oh, him. Adrian Thompson. I think you even dated him at one point,” Bill replied.

“Oh yeah. Not a bad kisser really,” Charlie said and then smiled at Phoenix. “You’re better though.”

Phoenix grinned and blushed, Charlie stealing a sweet kiss before he pulled away, casting a glance at Remus and Sirius, who each nodded at his gentle handling of their daughter. Charlie usually found himself glancing at the pair whenever he kissed Phoenix, and, strangely, he found he quite liked their approval. He liked knowing that they felt him good enough, that he was doing the right thing by the beautiful little blonde.

The meal passed uneventfully, and at the end Albus stood and caught everyone’s attention. 

“As you all may have noticed, this castle will be housing some extra guests this weekend,” Albus said, waving his arms over the various members of Harry’s family dotted around the room. “I ask that you show them every courtesy while they are with us, and you remain mindful of the experiences of some of our guests.” At this, he cast a warning look at the Slytherin table. “Now, the hour is getting on, and I think it is time for you all to be off to bed. Goodnight all.”

There was a scrape of benches as people stood and the family started to gather together. As Severus and Solarin said a few final words to Slughorn, Pansy, Crabbe and Goyle made their way over. Leading them was Blaise Zabini, who had clearly taken Draco’s place as the Prince of Slytherin.

“Oh, look, if it isn’t Potter and his baby,” Zabini said as Harry retrieved Miri from Neville. “We were just wondering, Potter, how it feels to know one day Lucius will take her from you? Probably why you handed her over to Longbottom. Distancing yourself, we understand. We can take her for you. You know, get her started on her training in the Slytherin way of things.”

Zabini and his cronies had obviously not noticed Remus and Sirius, or the other adult members of the family seated at the table. If they had, they might have realized how incredibly stupid they were being. Well, that and the fact that a small contingent of seventh year Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff students had suddenly surrounded them from behind. Everyone was watching tensely, waiting to see what Harry would do with the confrontation.

Harry turned to Seamus, handed Miri to him, and then squared up to Blaise, getting right into his personal space. 

“As if I would let a Death Eater prick like you near my baby,” Harry said, his voice low and dangerous. “As for them…please. Pansy would try putting her in a potion, and Crabbe and Goyle would use her for a quaffle, not realizing their heads would serve that purpose much better. After all, there isn’t really anything in them, is there? Now, why don’t you slither off to the hole you crawled out of and go and gestate there for another thousand years. That way, you might have a chance of growing a brain.”

Zabini opened his mouth to retaliate, but never got the chance as Solarin squeezed her way into the crowd, followed closely by Molly, Arthur, Anne and Jack.

“Problem?” the augur said brightly.

Blaise seemed to be unable to speak and Bill hid his smile. Her curves never failed to reduce men to a pile of putty, no matter their age. “Of course not, no problem. Just offering the Slytherin time to Potter, if he was looking for a babysitter,” Blaise said.

Solarin smiled. “That’s very nice of you, Mr Zabini, but I assure you that Harry has no need of you as a babysitter. He has enough people to help him.”

The effect was instantaneous. “Of course, another little Gryffindork bitch to faun over Potter,” Blaise sneered at her.

“I’ll have you know, Mr Zabini, that my sister was a Slytherin. And Harry is a Potter-Snape now, thank you.”

Blaise froze and slowly turned around to face Severus. He smiled up at his former Head of House. “Hi, Professor. We were just talking. I…ummm…didn’t know you had a sister.”

“Yes, I do. This is my younger sister, Solarin. You were talking with my husband,” Severus said silkily. “What an interesting way to put it. Funnily enough, it looked to be something more than that from where I was standing. I believe Professor Slughorn would like a word with you Slytherin’s.”

He moved aside to reveal a furious Slughorn, flanked by the other three heads of house. He crooked a finger and the Slytherin’s went off with him, the portly man berating them all the way.

Harry and Severus slowly walked back to their rooms, where the family was waiting for them. 

“Severus, why was Professor Slughorn so angry? I don’t remember you being that equal with students,” Harry said, Miri in his arms, glancing around interestedly at the whispering portraits and waving Smoo at them.

Severus smirked. “Are you saying I was biased?” 

“Damn straight,” Harry said. “So much favouritism for Slytherin’s, it was down right disgusting at times.”

Severus laughed. “An accurate description,” he agreed. “All right, I admit that I was unfair. But that was then, this is now, and I remind you that I married a Gryffindor. Is that equal enough for you?”

“Very,” Harry said and stole a quick kiss. “So, Professor Slughorn isn’t playing favourites with his own House like you did?”

“Horace has never gone in for favouritism. He is…equal opportunity, shall we say,” Severus said. “He likes to see a students talents before he favours them. I did hear that Hermione is one of his favourites.”

“Were you one of his favourites?”

“I was, in my own way. I was never in his club, but Horace helped me qualify for my title as Potions Master. He was always on hand to help me iron out any problems or look over a part of my essay or application. He helped me a great deal,” Severus said as they paused to gaze out of the window at the Lake, where the Giant Squid was lazily waving its tentacles above the water. “I do understand how you feel about this place, Harry. Hogwarts was my first real home, too.”

“Even if the Marauders made your life difficult?”

“Just the way of it,” Severus said with a smile. “It was better being here and dealing with the Marauders than being at home and dealing with Tobias.” He sighed. “It was a long time ago.”

Harry smiled up at him. “A very long time. Longer than I’ve been alive. Cradle snatcher,” he teased and Severus laughed, pulling him into his arms.

“I might be a cradle snatcher, but I think I keep up with you fairly well for an old man.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Severus cracked his eyes open as Harry scrambled from the bed, half running to the bathroom. He heard Harry throwing up and glanced at the bedside clock to find it was five in the morning before following his husband.

“Are you all right, love?” Severus asked as he rubbed the slim back.

Harry pulled back, sweating and shaking, clutching his abdomen. “Perfect, just perfect,” Harry grumbled. 

“Monthly?”

Harry nodded. “And we didn’t bring anything for it.”

“I’ll go to Poppy, get you what you need. Take a shower and I’ll be back before you know it,” Severus said, pulling on his robe and slippers. It was too early for anyone to really be awake to see him, and he no longer felt the need to scare away everyone with his bat-like robes and Scary Professor persona. That he saved for special occasions.

When Severus returned, Harry was showered, dressed and throwing up again. Ron was rubbing his back and Hermione was bouncing Miri, keeping her occupied while Harry was busy.

“We came to see how he was feeling, what with the disagreement with the Slytherin’s last night, and his first match being today,” Ron said as he gave up his place to Severus. “Hermione gave him her pads again.”

“I’ll replace them, I swear,” Harry said as he leaned back, gasping.

“Good to know,” Hermione said.

Harry gulped down the pain potion and anti nausea one Severus had brought for him and curled into Severus’ embrace as he waited for them to take effect. 

“Will you be okay to play?” Ron asked as he leant against the doorframe.

“I’ll be fine,” Harry said with a shaky smile as Hermione handed Miri to him. “It’s not the first time I’ve played with a monthly. Go on, we’ll meet you in the Great Hall in a bit.”

They left and Harry slowly hoisted himself to his feet, brushing his teeth as Severus showered and dressed for the day. Harry dressed Miri in her little Hogwarts uniform, which finally fit her, and grabbed her baby bag before making his way down for breakfast. The Hall was eerily silent, and Harry found the Gryffindor table only held his team mates.

“Relax, it’s just a game,” Harry said as he sat down, Severus opting to sit with him instead of with the teachers.

Seamus, Dean and Ginny were playing Chaser, Jimmy Peakes, a third year, and Richie Cootes, a fourth year, had replaced Fred and George as Beaters. Ron was playing Keeper, and little Colin Creevy was reserve Seeker, just in case. Ron had replaced Harry as Quidditch captain, and he claimed that the team were all ready for Harry to join them. All Harry had to do was concentrate on catching the snitch, they would do the rest.

“He’s right, you know. Besides, it’s Hufflepuff. Easy win.”

They looked up and a wide smile spread across Harry’s face. Walking in to the Great Hall behind Fred and George were Oliver Wood, Angelina Johnson, Katie Bell, Alicia Spinnet, and Lee Jordan. Harry’s old team sat down with his current one and happily proclaimed that they wouldn’t have missed this for all the world, and told Harry how beautiful his baby was. The three former female Chasers immediately began cooing over Miri, who giggled at all the attention.

“She looks so cute in her little uniform,” Angelina said.

“Yeah, Fred and George gave it to me,” Harry said.

As Harry finished feeding Miri, and a squabbling match between Alicia, Angelina and Katie began over who got to hold her so Harry could eat, the Hall began to fill with people. Harry noticed the dirty looks from the Slytherin’s as they entered and smirked, giving them a little wave. He had heard that they were all receiving detentions from Slughorn.

“You haven’t got a maternal bone in your body, Katie!” Alicia snapped and Harry sighed.

“Hey, Oliver, you want to hold her?” Harry called and his former captain grinned, nodding, the girls staring open mouthed as Harry happily handed her over. “Oh, you can all have a turn, she’s fine with pass the parcel.”

Harry tucked into his breakfast and then chatted with the others as the rest of the family drifted in. 

“Ah, Oliver, what a pleasant surprise,” Solarin said as she hurried in with Dorian, Bill trailing behind them. “Oliver, this is Dorian, my son. Dorian, this is my friend, Oliver. Oliver, maybe you can explain to my son why he can’t play Quidditch with Harry and the others.” 

Oliver passed Miri to Alicia and hoisted the little boy onto his lap as Ron grabbed the teams attention. “We should be going.”

Harry kissed Severus and then Miri before he followed Ron out, the team gathering around him like bodyguards. As they reached the locker room, they ran into Charlie, who handed Harry his broom and Quidditch robes, and then made his way off to the stands, which were already starting to fill with people. The sky was a perfect clear blue, not a single cloud in sight. It was the perfect day for Quidditch.

Ron pulled Harry aside as the rest of the team walked into the changing room. 

“Are you all right for this?” Ron asked.

“I’m fine, Ron, really,” Harry assured, touched by the concern.

Ron looked thoughtfully at him for a moment before he nodded. “Okay then. Well, if it gets too much for you up there, just signal to me and I’ll call a time out. Severus will be waiting on the ground, so he’s right there if you need him,” said the redhead and Harry smiled at him.

“You’re a really great friend, Ron,” Harry said and clapped him on the shoulder, making Ron blush spectacularly, before they entered the changing room. 

The others turned away as Harry changed, giving him some privacy at Ron’s request, and then Ron fortified them all with a few quick words on the game ahead.

“All right, listen up, everyone,” Ron said. “There’s no pressure for today, it’s just a game to get us all back in shape. We all know our jobs. Ginny?”

“We keep possession of the quaffle as much as possible, and concentrate on scoring as many goals as possible,” she replied as she tied back her long hair.

“Good. Jimmy?”

“Me and Richie keep the bludgers away from the team, and aim them at Hufflepuff if possible,” Jimmy said, pulling on his gloves.

“Perfect. I’ll guard the goals, and Harry?”

“Ignore everything else and catch the snitch,” Harry said, gulping down the extra potions Severus had given him as he left the breakfast table.

“Right then, I think we’re ready,” Ron said and they all moved to the door, each grabbing their brooms.

They made their way onto the pitch and stood around Madame Hooch, listening to her ask for a nice clean game, before they mounted their brooms and kicked off.

For Harry, it felt wonderful, being up in the air. He glanced around, taking in the yellow robes of the Hufflepuff team, the red of his own, and there on the ground were the dark clothes of his lover. Severus was standing off to the side on the ground, watching the proceedings. Harry found it comforting that Severus was never very far away. The game was fast and furious, despite it being a friendly game. Harry glanced around for the snitch, trying to catch a glimpse, and caught a snatch of the commentary. Hang on, that sounded familiar…

“Nice pass to Chaser Weasley from Chaser Finnegan, back to Weasley, over to Thomas, to Weasley, Keeper Boot dives, GRYFFINDOR SCORE!”

Harry laughed. Lee Jordan was doing the commentary, just like he used to when Harry first started at Hogwarts. He glanced around for the snitch again, not seeing it yet. He did a few laps around the pitch, waving at the visitors box as he passed it. Miri was settled on Remus’ lap, the tiny girl clapping as her carrier sped past her. Dorian looked the most excited about the game, Bill keeping a tight one armed grip on the tiny boy as he tried to touch Harry as he passed. Solarin was no where to be seen, and Harry suspected she had refrained from watching the game.

The game dragged on, Gryffindor leading Hufflepuff 120 to 90, and an hour had passed before Harry had a problem. Harry turned on his broom to see the Slytherin’s waving a banner at him. He squinted to get a look at it and suddenly couldn’t breathe. There, glaring at him in Slytherin green, were the words PRETTY LITTLE LEGEND.

Ron glanced over and saw Harry sway on his broom. He frantically motioned to Madame Hooch, who blew her whistle, and Seamus and Dean helped Harry out of the air, setting him safely on solid ground and into Severus’ arms.

“Harry, love, come on, talk to me,” Severus urged. “What happened?”

Harry clung to Severus, trying to calm his racing heart. He glanced up and saw the Slytherin’s frantically trying to reel in their banner, the side of it caught on a loose nail. Harry reached out and grabbed Dean’s arm, as he was closest to him, and pointed up at it.

“Look at what they’ve done,” Dean said, and the entire team looked up. Ron and Seamus mounted their brooms and sped off, grabbing the banner and yanking it out of Pansy and Blaise’s hands, before landing and showing it to Professor’s McGonagall and Slughorn, who had moved onto the pitch.

The two teachers were furious, and they marched off to grab the two Slytherin’s. Harry slowly began to calm, Severus’ soothing reassurances helping him to settle. After a few minutes he pulled back and kissed Severus, ensuring his calm. 

“All right, love?” Severus asked.

“Yeah, I’m okay now,” Harry said.

“You still all right to play? We can send Creevy on if you’re not,” Ron reassured.

“No, I’m fine now, I want to get back to the game,” Harry said firmly, grabbing his broom.

They took to the air again and Harry hovered above the game, watching the two teams score points, make passes, swerve and dive to avoid each other and the roving bludgers. Once or twice, Harry thought he saw the snitch, but it turned out to be the glint of a wrist watch. It was nearing lunch when Harry finally spotted the tiny golden ball and sped after it, the Hufflepuff Seeker speeding after him, desperately trying to catch up. The Seeker caught up to Harry, inch by inch, and soon they were neck and neck, both trailing after the snitch, and the game ground to a halt, watching the two petite players tearing around the pitch, desperately trying to win. 

They hurtled towards the ground, the Hufflepuff Seeker glancing at Harry nervously, trying to gauge if Harry was going to pull away, but Harry wasn’t going to pull away. Harry knew that his panic in the air had lulled the other Seeker into the mistaken assumption that he was a bag of nerves, but flying was the one area of his life he had no problems with, Ron had seen to that. Every Sunday afternoon for the past few weeks, Harry, Ron and a few others had taken to the garden, ensuring there were no problems whatsoever with Harry’s ability to fly.

They were a metre from the ground and the Hufflepuff Seeker lost his nerve, pulling away, and Harry pulled up a mere inch from the ground, his fingers closing around the tiny ball. He hovered in the air and waved the snitch above his head. The crowds burst into applause, his team cheering, the Hufflepuff’s looking shocked.

Harry felt incredible, and the kiss Severus gave him as he landed didn’t hurt either.

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Severus lay there in the dark, watching Harry sleep, his face bathed in the light from the crescent moon.

Watching Harry play had been more enjoyable than he had thought it was going to be. Aside from the Slytherin induced panic, for which Zabini and Parkinson were facing possible expulsion (something Horace and Albus would decide upon when they had calmed down that is), Harry had enjoyed himself immensely. They had spent most of the afternoon down by the lake with family and friends, talking and joking.

Harry looked so innocent in his sleep, it was hard to believe that true horrors lay in his past. But they were there, and they were keeping Severus up. He ran his long fine fingers over Harry’s nose, the shell of his ear, the bow of his mouth. He toyed with the wild raven tresses, stroked his thumb over an impossibly high cheekbone, kissed his scar. Harry moaned and reached for him, tangling his fingers in Severus’ pyjama shirt. 

Severus released himself from the hold and eased from the bed. Harry reached for him and, coming up with only air, cracked open his eyes to find Severus getting dressed.

“What are you doing?” Harry croaked.

“Going for a walk,” Severus said. “I can’t sleep, a walk around the castle might clear my head.”

“Anything I can help with?”

“No,” Severus said, sitting down and brushing Harry’s hair out of his eyes. “I just need some time alone, love.”

“Like I do on my bad days?”

“Exactly. Go back to sleep, I’ll be back in a bit,” he said, pulling on his boots.

Harry pulled him down into a sweet sleepy kiss before rolling onto his front and burying his face in Severus’ pillow. Severus tucked him in and grabbed his wand before he silently slipped from the private quarters.

Severus wandered through the silent hallways, ending up in his old classroom. It somehow seemed smaller, more constricting, and he wondered how he had managed all those years teaching in it. He was just wandering through the rows of desks when the door opened.

“I thought I saw you come down here.”

Severus turned around to find Minerva McGonagall standing against the doorframe. He smiled at her.

“You know, in all the years of teaching, I never quite lost the urge to call you professor. I suppose old habits die hard.” He laughed. “Do you remember how much trouble I was as a student?”

She smiled. “I remember that the trouble with you was that you were such a perfectionist,” she said and he flushed. “All the times you would start fresh with a spell because you didn’t feel it was perfect. It didn’t matter what anyone told you, you insisted it had to be perfect. Anything less just wasn’t good enough for you.”

“I wanted to get it right,” Severus said defensively.

“Relax, it wasn’t a criticism. I was just pointing out how little you changed over the years.”

“What do you mean?”

“You always expected perfect of your students, and you married the only man who is perfect in your eyes,” she pointed out and he smiled. “Mind some company?”

“Not at all,” he said, and he realised he didn’t mind her joining him. It was the thought of Harry joining him that had him shaking. He had concerns he didn’t want Harry to hear.

They took seats at desks and Minerva summoned a bottle of Firewhisky and two glasses. She poured generous measures and passed him one. She remained silent as he drank, letting him gather himself a little before she pushed the matter.

“So, why are you wandering the castle in the middle of the night?” she asked as she poured the second measures.

“Can’t sleep.”

“Something you need to offload?”

He smirked at her. “Under the same rules as when I was a student telling you my troubles?”

She laughed. “Yes, the rules haven’t changed. You offload, we get sozzled, and you feel much better in the morning, after a hangover potion that is,” she said. “Severus, do you know why I let you drink when underage?”

“No, I never did figure that one out, or why you listened to me prattle on,” he admitted. “I wasn’t even in your house. Are you about to solve one of the great mysteries of my youth?”

“Severus, I allowed you to use my ear and liquor collection because I saw what potential you had. Even as a first year, you had such promise. With what was happening at home, I felt you would blossom if you had the right guidance, and that would never have been possible had you not released some tension every now and then. Albus was always aware of our drinking, I did not act alone. Hogwarts was your sanctuary, we all saw that, and what would a sanctuary be without a shoulder to lean on?” she revealed and he stared at her in shocked silence for a moment before he laughed.

They sat in silence for a while, before Minerva spoke once more.

“So, what is on your mind, Severus?” she questioned.

He sighed. “I can’t help but feel guilty,” he confessed and she inclined her head in query. “All that time Lucius was spinning me pretty lies, and I wanted so badly to believe him. I was stupid, I was so blind, Professor. I should have seen past it, I had enough God-damned experience with lies. And because I let myself get fooled, he did all those terrible things to my beautiful Harry.”

“Oh, Severus,” she said as tears began to fall down his face. She pulled him into a hug, remembering, with startling clarity, the way he had cried as a student. Those tears had happened too often to keep track of.

“I’m sorry,” he sobbed. “I’m so sorry.”

“There now, come on, Severus, it’s all right,” she soothed. “Severus, listen to me. When have I ever steered you wrong?”

“Never.”

“Have I ever told you pretty lies to make you feel better?”

“No.”

“So, listen to me now and believe me,” she said, pulling her chair so she could sit facing him. She sighed. “We’re all a little to blame, I think. We all relaxed after Voldemort was defeated, we all let our guards down. We should have kept a closer eye on Harry, we should have realized the dangers he still faced. But we didn’t, and we can’t change that now. Answer me this, does Harry blame you?”

“No.”

“Who does he blame?”

“Lucius.”

“Then why do you blame you?”

“Because I should have protected him,” Severus whispered.

“Because Lily asked you to watch over her son, because you’ve loved him since he was thirteen,” she said simply and he gaped at her, the old witch smiling. “Severus, do you think we’re blind? We all saw the way you looked at him, we all knew how you felt, even if you didn’t. We also saw the way he looked at you. The trouble is that the two of you are so damn stubborn. Neither of you would let go of the old feelings, so you had no chance of embracing the new ones. But you’re together now, you’re honest now, and that is more important than anything that might have happened in the past.”

“But I still got fooled, and Harry is still so damaged, and…and…oh, Professor!”

She silenced him by pulling him into a hug, letting him cry. Eleven months of caring for Harry and Minerva knew that this was the first time Severus had really let it all out. He had bottled up his feelings as a student too, and his tears had been just as fierce then. Severus had listened to Harry’s memories, comforted him, nursed him back to health, all without offloading. Minerva knew how much it had cost Severus to admit his love for the petite Gryffindor. Severus had been pushing people away for so long that she had begun to suspect he had forgotten how to let anyone in. 

She let him cry, and then left him to his thoughts, leaving him with the bottle of alcohol. 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Harry rolled over, reaching out to snuggle into Severus, but the bed was empty. He sat up and looked around.

Harry had never woken up without Severus before, not since the first time he crawled into bed with him. He discovered it was not something he enjoyed. He slipped from the bed and checked the communal sitting room, finding it empty, before showering and dressing. He scooped up a sleeping Miri and crept to Remus and Sirius’ room.

“Harry? What’s wrong?” Remus said as he blinked at the early morning light.

“Will you watch Miri for me?” Harry asked as Sirius groaned and sat up.

“Of course we will,” Sirius said, holding out his arms. 

“She should be awake soon. Just get her dressed and entertain her, I’ll be back soon,” Harry said as he slipped his sleeping baby into his godfathers arms.

“Where are you going?” Remus asked as Sirius lay Miri down between them, covering her over. 

“Severus went for a walk last night, to clear his head, and he hasn’t come back. I’m going to go and find him.”

“Do you want one of us to come with you?”

Harry hesitated for a moment before he nodded. Sirius climbed from the bed and pulled on some clothes, before the two of them left the suite. They slowly made their way along the hallways, looking out of every window to try and spot Severus.

Harry looked up as Bill came striding towards them. “There you are,” Bill said. “McGonagall came to the rooms looking for you. You might want to come with me.”

Harry and Sirius followed Bill down to the dungeons, to Severus’ old classroom. Curled up in a corner was Severus, fast asleep with an empty bottle of Firewhisky beside his feet. Professor’s McGonagall and Slughorn were standing worriedly by the door, and Harry gave them a questioning look.

“We can’t wake him, he just keeps telling us to go away,” Slughorn said.

Harry slowly made his way across the room and knelt down in front of Severus’ huddled form. He brushed Severus’ dark hair away from his face and stroked his cheek. Severus mumbled something unintelligible, and sleepily tried to bat the hand away.

“Severus,” Harry called. “It’s time to get up.”

“Go ‘way,” Severus groaned.

Harry smiled. “Is that any way to talk to me?”

“It is if you won’t leave me alone.”

“Come on, love, you need to get up. Do you really want all you old students seeing you like this?”

“I don’t care, I don’t care about any of it,” Severus said. He sniffed and a few tears fell down his pale cheeks. “What does it matter, when it’s my fault?”

“What’s your fault?”

“What happened to my sweet Harry, what he did to him,” Severus sobbed. “He did all those terrible things to my beautiful Harry, and it’s my fault. I believed his lies. I was so stupid! All the times I was taught not to believe anything unless I had proof, and I believed that son of a bitch! I wanted to believe him, and all the time he was torturing my sweet Harry. It’s all my fault.”

Harry sat there stunned for a moment, before his temper flared. 

“Don’t you dare,” he breathed.

“What?”

“Don’t you dare blame yourself for this!” Harry cried. “Severus Tobias Potter-Snape, you open your eyes and look at me right now, or I swear, I am getting Miri and going home without you!”

Severus’ eyes snapped open and he looked at his angry spouse. He hadn’t realised it was Harry trying to wake him, he had thought it was Slughorn trying once again. He hadn’t realised it was his sweet Harry he was talking to, revealing everything he didn’t want Harry to know.

“Listen up, Professor Snape, and listen good. This. Is. Not. Your. Fault,” Harry said firmly. “And if you start blaming yourself for what he did, you’re going to find yourself sleeping alone, on the sofa, and celibate for a very long time, do you understand me?”

“Since when has it been Professor?” Severus questioned after a few moments stunned silence.

“Since you started talking like an idiot. I thought I was supposed to be the dunderhead.” Harry smiled and Severus dissolved into another bout of tears. Harry let himself be pulled into Severus’ arms and he stroked the dark hair as Severus buried his face in Harry’s chest. “Hey, now. Come on, it’s all right. I’m safe now. It doesn’t matter, none of it matters. All that matters is that I’m safe now.”

“But I should have seen! I should have seen through all those pretty lies I wanted to believe!”

“Yes, you should,” Harry agreed, making Severus’ head snap up, the stunned older man staring at him in shock. “And Hermione should have seen me being dragged away. And Mad-Eye and all the other Auror’s should have searched Malfoy Manor more thoroughly. And there are a million things that should have happened and didn’t. Severus, do I look angry about all the failings?”

“No.”

“Am I blaming any of you, any of my family and friends, for what happened to me?”

“No.”

“Then shut up.” Harry leaned in and kissed his forehead. “I love you. I’m married to you. I belong to you. It doesn’t matter, not really. Yes, I still have my wobbly moments, and bad days and nightmares, but there is something more important than all of those things. More important than everything that has happened.”

“What’s that?”

“I. Am. Here. I’m not there anymore, I’m here. I know you feel guilty. I know a lot of people do. And I accept that, I can’t change it. I accept what happened, I can’t change that either. There’s another thing I can’t change too. And that is right now. I love you, have a wonderful marriage with you, and a beautiful daughter with you. I have a life with you. I try and focus on that rather than what led up to it.”

“I still blame myself,” Severus said.

“I know. And I get that. Don’t you know that there are days when I blame myself? Don’t you know that there are moments when I think back and replay it over and over in my mind to try and think of what I could have done differently, of what could have stopped it from happening? It’s okay for you to feel guilty, but don’t you dare take all the blame. It was Lucius’ fault, no one else’s. But, I know I can’t stop you feeling something, and I’m not going to try. This is how you feel, and I get that.”

Severus couldn’t believe it. He had, unwittingly, told Harry everything he was feeling, all the guilt he felt, and Harry was fine with it. He hugged Harry tight, feeling the sprite hug him back, and that pressing weight of guilt began to ease. He would never truly stop blaming himself for what happened, but, for now, he could live with it.

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Harry paced around the playroom with Miri, trying to get her to settle. She had a stomach-ache and Sam had reassured him that no medical intervention was necessary, it would pass on its own. 

“Is she okay?”

Harry looked up to find Solarin standing in the doorway.

“She’s fine, just her bellyache. Where’s Dorian?”

She smiled and entered the room fully, taking a seat. “With his daddy. I had to leave the room, way too sweet, even for me,” she said with a grin. “They’re playing with the train set, and Dorian has Bill in a little conductor hat. I had to leave before I ruined it with my uncontrollable laughter.”

Harry sniggered. “Point taken. Here, you have a try,” he said, handing Miri to Solarin.

“So, how is Severus after his little outpouring?” she asked as she began to pace with the tiny girl, Miri grabbing her long hair and tugging on it in complaint.

“Better, I think,” Harry said, taking her empty seat. “He’s a little more clingy than before, more affectionate. And he’s become very protective.”

“More than before?”

“Way more. He barely lets me out of his sight now. And if I am out of his sight he likes to know where I am.”

She sat down in the window seat and laid Miri across her lap, using her fist to gently massage her belly. “Does it bother you?”

“Not really. I just worry about him.”

“He’ll be okay,” she reassured. “He just needs some time. It’s only been two weeks since you played at Hogwarts, he’s bound to be a little uneasy. Just let him do his thing for a while and soon he’ll start to relax.”

She peered at Harry for a few moments before she spoke again.

“Harry, do you remember when I made the predictions about Tobias?”

“Yes. I yelled at you.”

She smiled briefly. “Yeah, you did. Do you remember asking me what the last prediction I got right was?”

“You told me it was a long time ago.”

“It was,” she said. “It was about sixteen years ago. I was seven, almost eight. It was just before Halloween.” She took a deep breath. “Harry, the last prediction I got right, before the Tobias one, was about you.”

“Me?” he said uncertainly. 

“I saw something bad happening to you, to James and Lily, to Remus and Sirius. I couldn’t see it clearly enough, if I had, perhaps none of it would have happened.” She hesitated and looked him in the eye. “I saw your parents dying, Harry. I didn’t see Peter, I didn’t see the specifics. But I did see that everyone would fail. I saw the inevitable. I’m sorry, Harry.”

Harry was silent for a moment, taking it all in. “If you saw it, why couldn’t anyone stop it?” he whispered.

“Because I didn’t see it clear enough. I didn’t see Peter’s involvement in it all. If I had, then maybe we might have been able to save them.”

“Why are you telling me?”

“Because you have the right to know. They were your parents, you deserve to know. Do you remember the day Hermione and Ron first came to visit you here, when you and Bill had to come and get me and Severus from the library?” He nodded. “Harry, I watched my mother die. I never spoke of it. Me and Severus were so upset that day because I finally told him what really happened to her, because he had the right to know. That’s the thing about a parent dying. The child always deserves the truth, even if it isn’t nice. I wanted you to know my part, because you deserve that much.”

The two of them fell silent, Solarin watching her brother-in-law as he took it all in. She remembered so clearly the day she made that prediction. It had scared Severus more than anything else, and Albus had been frantic in trying to prevent it. In the end, all their preparations and precautions had not saved Lily and James Potter, and Solarin had refused to ever look into the future by choice again, a decision she had stuck to for more than a decade.

“Thank you,” Harry said. “Not just for telling me this. Thank you for everything. I meant to thank you ages ago, but I never got around to it.”

“You’re welcome.”

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It was rare that Sirius got a moment all to himself.

He was usually sitting with someone talking out a problem, or with Remus or one of his children, not to mention all the chores he usually got roped into. And when he wasn’t doing any of that, he was working on his book.

So it was a pleasant surprise for the Animagus to find himself alone one morning, lounging on a sofa in the living room with a good book. He had enjoyed muggle literature ever since his first year at Hogwarts, when Remus had let him loose on his considerable collection of paperbacks. Jane Eyre had always been one of his favourites. He was just getting to the part where Jane was sent away to school when he felt himself being watched.

Sirius looked up to find Harry standing in the doorway, watching him.

“You all right, pup?” he asked.

“Not really. I was wondering if I could cuddle with you? Severus is working on his potions and Remus is trying to explain Horcruxes to Nix. I’m feeling a little off and I don’t want to disturb them,” Harry said, his voice timid and unsure.

Sirius laid aside his book and opened his arms, smiling as his son moved into them. Harry laid down against his side, his back to the back of the sofa, his head on Sirius’ chest. Sirius stroked Harry’s hair as Harry curled his fingers in his shirt.

“Sirius?”

“Yes, pup?”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Of course. You can ask me anything, Harry, anything at all.”

Harry sighed. “Will you tell me what happened when I disappeared? I mean, I know what happened on my end, but I’ve never really found out what happened on yours.”

“Are you sure you want to know? I can only tell you my part, Harry, I can’t tell you all of it, I can only tell you what I know, what I remember,” Sirius cautioned.

“I want to know.”

Sirius took a deep breath and let himself think back. 

“Me and Remus were in the kitchen. He was making a treacle tart, we were going to bring it with us when we went to the Weasley’s for dinner. I was trying to build a house out of cards and the wireless was on. Then Hermione came through the floo, followed by everyone else. Merlin, Hermione was so upset, no one could calm her down. No one could tell us what had happened. They had searched the whole area and found your wand, but not you. They couldn’t explain it, how no one had seen or heard anything. When Albus arrived, I knew it was bad. We spent most of the day searching for you, but there was nothing. We looked everywhere, even Malfoy Manor. But, we didn’t find you. That wing of the Manor was empty Harry, I swear it. He must have hidden you somewhere else while we were there. Then it just went on, day after day, searching, and still nothing. The days turned into weeks, the weeks to months. It never got easier. Every day, I’d hope for some news, any news. But it never came.”

“Did you miss me?” Harry whispered.

“Harry, I love you. Of course I missed you. I’d just got you, and then that bastard took you from me. You can’t even begin to imagine how much I missed you. You have no idea how scared I was. I was so afraid that I would never see you again,” Sirius said, hugging him closer. Sirius smiled gently. “Then, there we are one day, and Solarin turns up. You have no idea how good it was to hear you were alive.”

Harry smiled and leaned his ear against Sirius’ chest, listening to his heart. “Thank you for telling me.”

“You asked.”

The two of them were silent for a while, before Harry spoke once more. “You know, if there’s something you want to know…about, well, what happened, you can ask me.”

“I know that. If there is anything, I will ask,” Sirius agreed. “So, are you looking forward to Christmas?”

Harry smiled. “Depends on who’s cooking.”

Sirius sniggered. “All of us are expected to pitch in, but Molly will be in charge of the cooking,” he said. He sighed, toying with Harry’s dark unruly hair. “I still remember your first Christmas.”

“You do?”

“Yes. Me and Remus went over to your mum and dad’s on Christmas Eve. We were going to spend the night, so we could be there when you woke up in the morning, get to watch you open your presents.” He laughed. “The tree fell on you.”

“What?”

“Me and you were lying on the floor, Remus was on the sofa with James talking about Quidditch, and Lily was decorating the tree. She piled so many decorations on one side that it toppled over. It landed on me and you, covered us in pine needles. You found it hilarious.”

Harry giggled. “Promise me that won’t happen to Miri,” he demanded. “I might have a heart attack.”

“I swear. No trees falling on anyone. So, have you given thought to what you want for Christmas?”

“Nope, and I’m not going to. I gave no thought to what I wanted for my birthday and you all still went berserk. I’m just going to sit back, keep my mouth shut and let you get on with it.”

“Probably the best way,” Sirius agreed with a grin.

Harry reached over and picked up the worn paperback, peering at the cover. He opened it and smiled. “Just how many books does Remus have?”

“We stopped counting after three thousand,” Sirius said. “He’s always been a big reader. I remember when we started Hogwarts. There we were, first night in the dorm. We were all unpacking and I looked over to Remus’ trunk and it was full of books. He took ninety books with him, all just for fun. That doesn’t include his school books.” Sirius smiled. “Remus was my tutor in all things muggle. Pissed my parents off no end.”

“I’ll bet they were thrilled about you dating Remus. His dad was a muggle wasn’t he?”

“Yes, John was a muggle. My parents were less than pleased. I gave up everything when I was sixteen. I gave it all up for Remus. We got married about a year later. My father paid for the wedding, though he didn’t know that until later. James’ dad gave me away, James was my best man. Lily and Tonks were our bridesmaids. Lily did our flowers, she went a little overboard.” He sniggered. “They were everywhere, absolutely everywhere. We got married in a little place called Merlin’s Garden. It’s not there anymore, it was torn down a few years ago. But it was beautiful. All white silk and roses. It was one of the best moments of my life, hearing Remus say I do. And then we spent ten days in Paris. We never left the hotel room, funnily enough.”

Sirius paused in his reminiscing to look down, noticing that Harry had drifted off to sleep. He kissed Harry’s messy hair and reached out to snag the blanket from the back of the sofa, covering Harry over. He picked up his book again and waited for Harry to wake.

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Severus emerged from his basement lab and went into the kitchen, expecting Harry to be sitting there feeding Miri, or perhaps finishing up his Defence lesson with Remus. But when he reached the kitchen, Remus was sitting alone with Phoenix.

“Where’s Harry?” Severus questioned. “And Miri?”

“Miri is in the playroom with Solarin, Molly, Dorian, Catherine and Joseph,” Remus said. “As for Harry, he finished his work so I let him go upstairs to amuse himself.”

Severus nodded and kept his mouth shut as he left the room. He knew he was overreacting, being possessive and clingy, but he couldn’t help it. Now he had admitted out loud how guilty he felt about Harry’s disappearance, he couldn’t quite get his possessive streak under control.

He slowly began checking the likely places his husband might be hiding. He wasn’t in the playroom, or the library. Nor was he in their bedroom or the nursery. He walked into the living room, about to alert the rest of the family that Harry was missing, to find Harry fast asleep, curled up to Sirius’ side.

“Hey,” Sirius said quietly. “I was wondering when someone would come looking for him.”

“How long has he been in here?” Severus asked as he took a seat.

“About an hour. He’s been asleep for twenty minutes. I didn’t want to wake him, he seemed so peaceful.”

“It’s your heartbeat,” Severus said. He paused and gazed at his father-in-law. “I have something to confess to you.”

“And I’m guessing you choose now, when my son is asleep against my chest, so I can’t hit you for it,” Sirius said with a smile.

“When Harry was first freed, he used to creep into my bed with me,” Severus said. “He had terrible nightmares, and he didn’t want to use potions every time he closed his eyes. He slept with me from the very beginning.”

“I didn’t know that,” Sirius said calmly. Strangely enough, he wasn’t angry about it. He could understand this one thing. “Did you know that I can’t sleep without Remus?”

“No.”

Sirius laughed quietly. “Yup. Bet you didn’t know me and him shared a bed in Hogwarts.”

“Really?”

“Really. Dumbledore gave us permission and everything. So, my heartbeat sent him off to sleep?”

“Yes. Something about it soothes him, relaxes him. In the beginning, it was the only thing that could get him to sleep, the sound of my heart. It still soothes him, when he’s having a bad night. I’m not surprised your heartbeat had the same effect.”

Sirius smiled and stroked Harry’s hair. “Tell me some things,” he said.

“What would you like to know?”

“I don’t know. Things about Harry I don’t know, things he wouldn’t mind me knowing. I missed so much of him growing up, there’s so much I don’t know.”

Severus settled further into his chair and stared meditatively at his husband. “His favourite fruit is peach. He jumps at thunder. He cannot sleep without being held, not well anyway. His favourite book is Matilda by Roald Dahl. He likes custard creams and peppermint tea. He talks in his sleep, and chews his thumbnail when he is nervous of asking something. In the beginning, when I first found him, he refused to be touched by anyone, even me. Every touch made him flinch. He only allowed people to touch him during his panic attacks, and then it was only me who could touch him.”

“How bad was he? In the beginning, I mean,” Sirius asked. “How bad was he when you first found him?”

Severus took a deep breath. “When I found him, almost every bone in his body was broken,” he whispered. “I was shocked he was still alive. He was so thin you could see his skeleton. I would go into more detail for you but I promised him I wouldn’t. I swore to him I would never tell anyone what I saw that night. I’m sure Harry would tell you himself, if you asked him.”

“It’s okay, I understand. I was just wondering. I don’t think I could actually handle knowing anyway,” Sirius murmured, stroking Harry’s hair, holding him a little closer at the thought of what had happened to his godson. “How did you do it? How did you get him back to something like he used to be?”

Severus smiled, reaching out to stroke the back of Harry’s hand. The petite brunet mumbled incoherently and snuggled closer to Sirius. Sirius stroked his hair until he settled again.

“It wasn’t easy,” Severus said. “It took time. Mostly, it was listening. It helped Harry to talk about what happened. That helped more than anything else. Still does, you’ve seen that for yourself. There were other things, little things. Giving him reassurance and comfort when he needed it. Being honest with him. I found that the best way to handle Harry was never to force him into anything. He works best on his own choices.”

The two of them sat there, Severus telling Sirius all the things he could think of that Harry wouldn’t mind him sharing. As they went on, Severus found himself enjoying the conversation. In return for everything Severus shared, Sirius shared his own pieces of information, such as Sirius’ allergy to unicorns and Remus’ addiction to blood-flavoured lollypops. 

Harry moaned and slowly cracked open his eyes to find Severus sitting in an armchair, watching him.

“If you’re sitting over there, who am I using as a pillow?” he asked sleepily.

The chest beneath him bounced as the mystery person chuckled. “That would be me, pup,” Sirius said. “We were talking and you fell asleep on me.”

“Oh, right. I remember. How long have I been out?”

“About an hour. It’s okay, me and Severus can entertain ourselves without you, you know.”

“Should me and Harry be worried by that statement?” Remus said as he entered the room. “However, taking in the scene, maybe it should be me and Severus that should be worried.”

“Ha, ha, very funny,” Sirius said as Harry sat up.

“Should I be worried that one of my parents thinks the other capable of cheating?” Harry joked as he held out his arms to Severus. He was wedged into the corner of the sofa, sandwiched between Sirius’ legs and the sofa back. Severus stood and reached out, lifting him from his place and hugging him briefly before setting him on his feet.

“I would never cheat on Remus,” Sirius said firmly as Remus pulled him to his feet. He leaned in and stole a kiss, feeling Remus smile into it.

“Of course not,” Severus said with a wicked Slytherin grin. “You’re too afraid of him maiming you for it.”

“Oh, fuck you!” Sirius said with a grin, shoving Severus slightly as they moved towards the stairs. “I can handle myself! I escaped Azkaban, thank you very much!”

“Oh, and we’re so proud of you for it,” Severus said sarcastically, poking his tongue out at him. Remus and Harry hung back as the two men continued to trade friendly insults, acting more Harry’s age than their own.

“Did you ever think we’d see them like this?” Remus said.

“Like what?” Harry asked.

“Acting like friends. Let me rephrase that, acting like Hogwarts-age friends,” Remus said as Severus and Sirius began flicking each other.

“Nope,” Harry said. “It’s nice though, isn’t it?”

“It is nice. Would have been even nicer if they could have actually gotten along in school, but I’m not complaining.”

The four made their way to the kitchen for lunch, Harry and Remus hanging back while their respective spouses traded harmless insults. The good mood didn’t last very long. It only lasted until they walked into the kitchen and caught sight of the grim faces of their family.

“What?” Harry asked, reaching out to grip Remus, the closest one to him. “What happened?”

Solarin came forwards and whispered something in Severus’ ear as Remus gathered Harry into his arms.

“Hush, pup, it’s all right, it’s all okay,” Remus murmured, stroking his hair.

“It’s Lucius, isn’t it?” Harry whispered. “He’s done something.”

“Yes, Harry, he has,” Severus said, carefully choosing his words before he said them. “He has found himself some friends.”

“Who?” Remus asked. He had a feeling that he wouldn’t like the answer.

“Bellatrix Lestrange and Fenrir Greyback. He broke them both out of Azkaban this morning.”

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“Harry, love, will you please sit down? You’re going to wear a hole though the floor and into my potions lab,” Severus said.

Harry had been pacing for the last hour, incoherently muttering to himself. The entire family had been called as soon as Moody had arrived with the news of the escapes and they were just waiting for the final few members to arrive.

“Leave him be, he’ll stop when he’s calmed down,” Molly said as the floo flared to life, expelling Sam and Tonks.

“Is it true?” Sam asked Remus, looking to his alpha to ease his worries.

“It’s true. He broke them out this morning,” Remus said. “What I want to know is why them? Why did Lucius choose those two?”

“Because he’s figured it out.”

Everyone looked at Solarin where she was perched on the sill of the open window. She looked more tired than anyone could ever remember her being.

“What do you mean?” Arthur questioned as Anne came through the floo, followed closely by Jack.

“Think about it,” she said, lighting up a fresh cigarette with the butt of the old one. “It’s been almost a year since he lost Harry. His owl posts haven’t worked in driving Harry out of hiding, threatening Severus didn’t work, killing people and threatening people hasn’t worked. He’s running out of ideas. So, he sits down and thinks about it, really thinks about it. The Burrow is gone, and Spinners End. Harry’s not at Hogwarts, he knows that. Where else would we hide Harry than with his parents? Fenrir Greyback for Remus, and Bellatrix Lestrange for Sirius. He’s trying to find us, the only way he knows how.”

“And how did he know they wouldn’t turn their backs on him as soon as he broke them out?” Jack questioned.

“Because they’re both insane,” she said. “It’s a game to them, and I bet you all the money in my Gringotts account that he promised them one of us as a toy after he’s done.”

“They can’t be completely insane,” Percy said. “How could he trust them if they were?”

“They are insane, and it’s not about trust, it’s about usefulness. Fenrir has a wonderful sense of smell, and Bellatrix knows more curses than most. They’re useful. And they’re easy to get onside. Think about it, all he has to do is promise Fenrir that he can have Remus as a plaything and Fenrir is all his to command.”

“What about Bellatrix? Who would he promise to give her as a plaything?” Ginny asked. 

A dark look passed between Percy and Solarin and suddenly Severus didn’t look so calm anymore. 

“What are you not telling us?” Severus demanded. “Solarin, what are you hiding from me?”

Every eye was on the augur, every family member holding their breaths. Bill looked suddenly suspicious of his brother, and no one could blame him. Solarin and Percy were looking at each other, a secret passing between them.

“Ginny, take Dorian upstairs,” Bill ordered and the girl disappeared with the child as fast as her legs could carry her. “I want to know what the fuck is going on with you two and I want to know right now.”

“Tell them,” Percy said. “They have to know, especially now.”

“I can’t,” Solarin whispered. “I can’t.”

Severus crossed the room and hoisted himself up onto the windowsill. He grabbed his sister by the shoulders and forced her to look at him. “Solarin, tell me. Whatever it is, you can tell me. We can even get everyone else to leave the room, so it’s just you and me.”

Solarin took a deep breath and blew it out in a long sigh before she looked her brother in the eye. “I’m sorry,” she whispered before she raised her left arm and ran her wand over the pale skin of her forearm.

There, dark on her pale flesh, was the bold scar of a Dark Mark.

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Severus climbed down from the windowsill and backed up against the wall, his face a mask of frozen horror, his dark eyes fixed on Solarin’s arm. Harry had finally stopped in his pacing and was staring at his sister-in-law in confusion. Everyone was staring at her in confusion, everyone but Percy.

“How?” Severus choked out.

“You know how,” she whispered. “You wanted me to forget, so I let you think that I did.”

“Forget what?” Harry asked.

“The day I was marked,” Severus said, sitting down heavily at the table. “Sit down and Solarin and I will tell you the tale.”

They all took seats at the table, all but Solarin, who chose to remain sitting on the windowsill.

“I was seventeen, not long out of Hogwarts. It was just after we moved to Hogsmeade,” Severus began, sounding incredibly tired, as if he had seen too much in his life to really handle it all. He reached out and entwined his fingers with Harry’s. “I realised that the biggest threat to Solarin was the Dark Lord. So, I began to cultivate a plan. If I offered myself to him in return for her safety then perhaps I could at least sleep at night without fear of someone coming to take her from me.”

“You only did what you thought was right,” Solarin said.

“Have you seen that arm lately?” he snapped. “How can you tell me that it was right?”

“It was necessary! Don’t you see? This is why I didn’t tell you, this is why I let you think I’d forgotten it.”

“Forgotten what?” Bill asked. “How did my wife end up with a Dark Mark?”

“I told you all once that Solarin had never met the Dark Lord,” Severus said. “I lied. She did meet him, and all the Death Eaters, when she was four. The Dark Mark on Sol is an echo of mine.”

“An echo?” Sirius asked.

“Because Severus was Solarin’s primary parent at that point, the bond between them was very strong,” Albus said. “She picked up on what was happening to him.”

“As you can imagine, the branding of Death Eaters was not a pain free experience,” Severus said. “It was excruciating.”

“It was no picnic on my end either,” Solarin said. “But that’s how I know Bella and Fenrir are insane. I met them, I read them, I know them. The problem is that I don’t know them well enough.”

“What do you mean?” Ron asked as he paced with Catherine, pausing every now and then to stroke Hermione’s hair or cheek, comforting his wife and playing daddy whilst still contributing.

“We need someone who knows them really well, someone who knows their weaknesses, their strengths, everything, and I just don’t, none of us do,” she said. She looked at Bill. “Did you really think I had slept with Percy?”

He looked sheepish. “Yeah, I did. But look at it from my point of view. He knew something about you, there was a secret between the two of you. Care to explain before I suffer another fit of jealousy?”

“I saw the Mark,” Percy said. “That’s what prompted my fight with Sol just before she graduated. I saw her Mark one night. She was by the lake, out after curfew. I saw the Mark and jumped to conclusions.”

The whole kitchen fell silent for a while, each of them lost in their own thoughts. They all suddenly knew what Lucius would give Bellatrix; he would give her Solarin to play with. They were all startled when a postal owl swooped in and dropped a letter in front of Albus. He tore it open and sighed. 

“They were not the only ones to escape with his help,” he said, passing the letter to Mad-Eye. “He also took Peter Pettigrew.”

“Why? What possible use could he have for Peter?” Sirius asked angrily. “That little weasel is worth nothing, absolutely nothing!”

Remus pulled him in close and captured his lips in a bruising kiss. “Calm down, sweetheart,” he murmured as he pulled away, stroking Sirius’ hair. “Just keep that temper of yours under control. No going after him this time. Let someone else handle it.”

“He betrayed us all, Remus,” Sirius argued.

Remus sighed and pulled away, standing up and striding across the room. “What the hell is going on inside your head, you bloody idiot! You swore to me, Sirius Orion Lupin-Black! You swore that I would never be alone again, that you would never leave me! How dare you even think of going after that son of a bitch again!”

“I didn’t mean that,” Sirius said.

“Really? Sounded like it to me,” Remus spat.

“I was just venting, I didn’t mean that I would go after Peter again, I promise. Ask Sol, she can read my mind,” Sirius pleaded, crossing to Remus and holding his hands.

“He’s telling the truth, he was just venting, letting his mouth run away with him,” Solarin said.

Remus seemed to deflate slightly, letting Sirius hold his hand though he still looked ready to throttle him. The family knew that this would be an argument between the two for another time.

“Sol,” Severus said, crooking a finger to beckon her over to him. She sighed and slowly climbed down from the windowsill. She hovered near him and pulled at her hair. “You should have told me.”

“Severus-”

“Let me finish,” he interrupted. “You should have told me, you shouldn’t have lied to me. But, considering my own actions in the past and what you saw as a child, I do understand why you did. However, if there is anything else you have been hiding from me, or felt that you were protecting me from, now is the time to tell me. This is the point where you can tell me absolutely anything and have me remain somewhat calm. Believe me, you will never get another chance to do this.”

“Perhaps we could go somewhere private?” she asked and he nodded, kissing Harry briefly before he took her hand and led her from the room.

“Personally,” Hermione said, bouncing Joseph. “I would not like to be Sol right now.”

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Severus led his sister to his potions lab and warded the door. He took a deep breath to steady himself. He knew whatever she told him wouldn’t be something he liked, but he had told her she could reveal anything.

He watched her, waiting silently, as she moved slowly around the room, stirring potions where needed. 

“I was always fascinated by you when I was little,” she said. “I used to watch you make potions and be completely transfixed.”

“One of the reasons I chose to teach them to you at such a young age,” he replied. “Solarin, whatever it is you need to tell me, you can do so. I promise you I will try to remain calm, that I will listen before I react.”

She hoisted herself onto the bench Harry usually occupied when he was in the lab and took a deep breath. 

“You know I love you, don’t you?” she asked.

“Of course.”

“So, when I tell you this, you need to understand that it isn’t about how much I love you or anything like that. It’s just about me, about what I need.”

“All right, I’m with you so far.”

“Severus…I don’t remember,” she said. “Mum, I don’t remember her, at all.”

Severus was stunned. He hadn’t expected anything like that to come out of her mouth.

“Nothing? Nothing at all?” he questioned.

“Nothing. The only thing I remember is how she died. I don’t remember her smile, or her voice. I only know what she looks like because of the locket. So…I started digging. I wanted to know about her, what she was like. It’s not that I don’t love you, or that you didn’t do the best job as a parent for me. I loved having you as my parent, still do. But…Sevus, I have to know, I need to,” she said.

He walked to her and pulled her into a hug. “I understand, sweetheart, honestly. Did you really think I’d be angry at you for this?”

“I was thinking you’d be more hurt than angry.”

“I’m not hurt, or angry, or upset. I understand. But you have to promise me something.”

“Promise what?”

“Promise that, whatever you find, whether it be good, bad, big or small, you will share it with me. I would like to know as well.”

“I promise.”

“Good. Now, is there anything else? Anything else at all?”

“No, nothing…you know, if there’s something you want to know, now would be the time to ask. I know that I’ve kept a lot from you over the years. If you want to know something, you can ask. I don’t guarantee to answer…”

Severus pulled back and looked her over, really looked. “Sometimes when I look at you, I’m shocked by how old you are. Somehow I always manage to think of you as a little girl still. But you’re not, and I know I don’t always realise that. I should realise it. I know that Bill is the best man in the world for you, that I raised you to be smart enough to choose a good man. But, I still have this need to know…your first time with him, when you two first slept together…it was your choice, wasn’t it? He didn’t pressure you?”

She smiled at him. “No, he didn’t. I was the one who led him astray.” She sighed wistfully. “That was the moment I knew he was mine, that he was the one I was meant to be with. When we connected like that, it was…I don’t know…it was kind of like…I knew where I fit, I finally felt like I belonged somewhere, really belonged. It was like coming home. It still is.” She laughed. “Afterwards, when it was all over, I pretended to be asleep. I was so afraid of looking at him, of what he might say. He laid there all afternoon, watching me sleep. He stroked my hair and my back. It was as if he was afraid to let go of me, like…if he did…I would disappear on him. And when I opened my eyes, he smiled at me and told me he loved me. He didn’t actually say a single word, but that look in his eyes was enough. I just knew.”

Severus smiled. He had always wanted that for her. Someone who saw just how incredible she was, who had the same fear of losing her that he did. And now he knew she had it, the crippling fear he had of someone coming to steal her away evaporated.


	8. Chapter Eight

Harry sat on the floor in the nursery and teased Miri with her stuffed dragon. The tiny girl squealed in delight and held out her little reaching hands to him, babbling away.

Harry’s head was so full, he was surprised it had not exploded. It was three days since the news of Lucius’ new ‘friends’ and the house was packed to breaking point. Remus had insisted on having Anne come and live in the house with them, and Sam, and Jack, which brought Tonks, and then Mad-Eye, residing in Grimmauld Place too. The only ones who were still in their own abode were Fred and George, and that was only because they were too busy to leave the shop. Mealtimes were always hectic now and it was hard to find an empty room.

Harry was not particularly afraid of the new developments. Solarin had put it in such a way that his fears were eased. Lucius had done this because he was running out of options. Whatever came next, whatever Lucius and his ‘friends’ did, Harry could handle it. He had his family to protect him, to help him weather the storm.

Harry had not spoken much since the news, not even to Severus. He had the feeling that everything he said would make it worse, though he wasn’t sure how that was possible. He was worried, sure, but more than that he was frustrated. He wanted to go out, but he was convinced that idea would be met with a flat out no. He was getting cabin fever, and no amount of walks around the garden would solve it.

Harry was so lost in his thoughts that he didn’t notice Miri sitting upright all by herself until she giggled at him. There were a few moments where Harry was stunned into silence before he laughed and clapped at her, picking her up. 

“Clever girl, Miri,” he praised, carrying her down to the kitchen. He found Remus sitting with Sam and Tonks, Severus at the counter chopping vegetables with Molly and Anne, and Hermione and Ron pacing with an irritable twin each.

“Everything alright, love?” Severus asked, spotting him.

“Fine, everything’s fine. I just wanted you to see something.”

“Oh. What is it?”

Harry laid Miri on the table and held out his hands, the kitchens inhabitants watching in amazement as she pulled herself up, letting go of his fingers and putting her little hands flat on the table to support herself.

“Just a little thing really. I just thought you’d want to see it,” Harry said innocently. Miri lifted her hands to clap and fell backwards, Harry catching her and picking her up to cuddle her close before he slipped her into her highchair.

As Harry stepped back, Severus pulled him in for a deep kiss, his long arms wrapping around his petite lover. Harry grinned into the kiss.

“I want to go out,” Harry blurted out as Severus pulled away.

“Excuse me?” Severus asked.

“I want to go out,” Harry repeated. “I’m so sick of staring at the same four walls. I want to go out.”

“Understandable,” Remus said, cautiously, seeing Severus about to protest out of sheer habit. “It has been a while since you left the house, and you are not a prisoner. This is your home, not Azkaban. Is there anywhere in particular you want to go, pup?”

This question was simple, and Harry knew the exact answer to it. “There’s a park I can see from the playroom window. I was thinking that maybe, now she can sit up on her own, Miri might like the swings. And Dorian. I wasn’t talking about going by myself. I was thinking of maybe a whole group of us going.”

There was dead silence in the kitchen while every eye fixed on Severus.

“Harry, love, I understand where you’re coming from, I really do…but-”

“Forget it,” Harry said angrily, moving to the door. “I shouldn’t have even asked, it was dumb. Too dangerous, I know. I’ll just go and read a book or something. Something nice and safe.” He stormed out the room and everyone heard the slam of a door.

“Did I miss something?” Solarin asked as she entered the room. “What’s wrong with Harry?”

“He wanted to go to the park, take Miri on the swings,” Anne said.

“Okay. Still not following.”

“Severus said no,” Tonks said. “Harry didn’t take it well.”

Solarin nodded and then looked at her brother. He suddenly looked very nervous. “Sol, don’t start. Harry does not need you to fight his battles for him,” Severus said.

“I didn’t say a word,” she said lightly, retrieving a teething ring from the freezer and passing it to Miri. “I mean, why would I? Harry can get his point across quite clearly all by himself. He saved the whole world, for Merlin’s sake, he can fight his own battles.”

Tonks grinned briefly before smothering it and watching the show.

“I was just going to ask what you’re going to forbid him from doing next,” Solarin continued. “Walks in the garden? He might be stung by a bee. Or perhaps helping you in the lab? Something might explode. Or reading, maybe? I’m sure paper cuts can be lethal.”

“You’re taking this way out of proportion,” Severus said as Hermione giggled.

“No, I’m not. This is his home, Severus, not his prison. You’re his husband, not his jailer. Answer me this, when was the last time Harry asked to leave the house?”

“Diagon Alley, beginning of October,” Severus answered immediately.

“Ummm, not to get in the middle,” Remus said. “But it was actually Sirius who asked you to go out because we needed some time alone. It wasn’t Harry who asked.”

“Exactly. Severus, Harry has only ever asked to go out once, when he wanted to come to Enchantment. And I know what you’re doing. You’re trying to wrap him up in cotton wool. I know because I happen to have been on the receiving end of you being a protective bastard many a time.”

“I was never that bad. You make me sound like a tyrant,” Severus argued.

“Really? You were never that bad? What about the first time I took the Hogwarts Express? You wanted to ride the whole way with me. Or my first day of Hogsmites when you wanted to stay the whole day and hold my hand. Or maybe when I got picked on in Hogwarts and you failed them all in Potions. Then there was my first bra, where you asked the woman in the shop if they sold chastity belts. Do I have to go on or am I getting through?” she reeled off.

“I don’t see how that all made me a tyrant.”

“No, you were protective, I get that. I always have. I grew up with you like this, I’m used to it, I take it in my stride. But put yourself in Harry’s shoes for a moment. Imagine how this all looks from his perspective. He rarely asks for anything and you said no without even thinking.”

Severus suddenly saw just how unfair he had been. Lucius didn’t even know where Harry was, and Harry had wanted the whole family to go. Severus immediately saw why Harry was so angry at him. It had not been an unreasonable request, but his response had been slightly too rash.

“Anne, will you watch Miri for me please? I need to go and beg forgiveness,” Severus said. She nodded and he made his way from the room and up the stairs.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Harry stared angrily at his and Severus’ marriage certificate, hanging proudly on the wall opposite the bed, next to Miri’s birth certificate. 

He was so angry he couldn’t actually form a complete word at this point. He hadn’t been this angry at Severus since they were still professor and student. Severus had just dismissed the idea, he hadn’t even waited for a moment to think, or to let Harry argue his point. 

Harry so desperately wanted to hit something, or hex something, or maybe blow something up. Well, perhaps more someone than something.

Just then, as Harry hexed a pillow across the room, a hand appeared around the door, waving a white handkerchief. Severus’ head appeared around the door. “White flag. You can’t hex someone with a white flag, it’s against the rules,” he said.

“Fuck the rules. And, while I’m at it, fuck you,” Harry spat. “In case you missed it, I’m mad at you.”

“No, love, I didn’t miss that one,” Severus said, entering the room and slowly approaching the bed. “I’m sorry, Harry. I overreacted. Forgive me?”

“No.”

Severus sighed and sat down on the bed, a clear distance between the two of them. “Sol made me see how unreasonable I was being. Apparently, I have been doing this to her for years.” He sighed. “Harry, I loved my mother very dearly, and she was taken from me. Your mother I cared for very much, and then one day she was gone. You and Miri and Sol, you’re all I have. I’m sorry if I behave like a scary possessive bastard, but you know I only do it because I love you so much, don’t you? You know that I wouldn’t be so scared of losing you if I didn’t love you so much, right?”

Harry looked up into the repentant black eyes. “Yeah, I know. But that doesn’t mean I’m not mad at you anymore,” he said.

“You have every right to be angry at me. I didn’t even listen, and I should have. So, here I am, listening.”

Harry took a deep breath. His anger had subsided somewhat, enough for him to talk rationally instead of just throwing curses around.

“I married you because I love you. But that wasn’t the only reason, you know that,” Harry said. “One of the other reasons was that I trust you. Severus, I married you because I want my life to be mine, to be defined by my choices. I don’t want to be ruled by him, by what he’s done, by what he might do. I want to make my own decisions and know that you’ll at least listen to me, even if you don’t let me have my own way. Right now, I want to take our daughter to the park. Every other parent can do that, why can’t I? Personally, I don’t think I’m asking for something unreasonable.”

Severus smiled. “You’re not. I was unreasonable. Is that really what you want, to go to the park?”

“Yes, that’s really what I want.”

Severus took a deep breath. “All right, but on one condition.”

“Which is?”

“I get to bring as many people as I like to protect you and Miri while we’re out.”

“Deal,” Harry said, leaning in to kiss his husband.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Sirius looked up from pulling on his boots to find Solarin hovering in his bedroom doorway.

“Forget something?” he asked.

“No, no, I didn’t forget something…ummm…Sirius, can I talk to you for a minute?”

“Yes…” he said worriedly. “Did I do something?”

“No.”

“All right, I’m listening. You’re missing Dorian on the swings, so I’m guessing this is important.”

Solarin took a deep breath. “Okay. Here’s the thing. When I was doing all the research for Draco, a lot of the Black family history got mixed in, because of Lucius’ marriage to Narcissa. Sirius…I couldn’t find a date of death for your father.”

“Excuse me?”

“Your father, he’s still alive.”

Sirius couldn’t quite process what she was saying. It wasn’t possible. It was just not possible. His father couldn’t still be alive. For one thing, Sirius wouldn’t have gotten this house if he was.

“No, he can’t be,” Sirius argued. “He died a year after I went to Azkaban, my mother two years after that.”

“Sirius, I’m not disputing what you were told. I’m just telling you what I found. There is no date of death for Canis Black.”

“Then it’s an error in the records.”

“They don’t make errors in the Ministry Hall of Records. All information is collected magically.”

Sirius stood up suddenly and advanced on her. She backed into the hallway and he followed, lunging forwards and grabbing her by the shoulders. He shook her, as if that would make her change what she had said.

“You’re wrong!” he yelled. “How would I have this house if he was still alive? How would I have my inheritance if he was still alive? Tell me that! Answer me that!”

“Sirius, let go of me,” she said, trying to control her rising panic. “Please, let go.”

“No, not until you answer me!”

“What on earth…?”

Sirius looked round to see Molly standing on the stairs. “Molly, stay out of this,” he said.

Solarin couldn’t breathe. She did the only thing she knew, the only thing she could always rely on to get herself out of trouble. She let go of her control and threw Sirius across the hallway, the Animagus staring at her in shock. 

Sirius couldn’t believe what he had done, how badly he had lost his cool. She wasn’t trying to hurt him, she was just trying to tell him, and he had completely lost it. He got to his feet and tried to move towards her, tried to apologise, undo some of the damage he had done, but all he managed to do was scare her. She scrambled away from him, walking backwards until her foot slipped over the top step and she went tumbling down to land in a crumpled heap at Molly’s feet.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Severus couldn’t believe he had said no to this. He couldn’t get enough of listening to Miri giggle as she was pushed on the swings. 

The sky was pretty clear, even if the day was cold, but coats and cloaks were enough to protect them from the elements. The tip of Harry’s nose had gone red.

Harry grinned at him. “Do I get to say it now?” he asked.

“Say what?” Phoenix asked as Remus pushed her on the swings.

“He wants to tell me that he told me so,” Severus said. “And yes, you get to say it now.”

“I told you so,” Harry sing-songed, grinning from ear to ear. “I told you this was a good idea.”

“Maybe not,” Arthur said, looking at the gate. 

Molly was helping a limping Solarin towards them, followed by a very worried and apologetic Sirius, carrying Sam’s bag.

“I am so sorry, Sol,” Sirius said.

“Shut up, you bloody rabid dog, and don’t even think of touching me,” she snapped and he withered under the venom in her voice.

“What happened?” Severus asked, rushing over.

“Don’t ask,” Solarin said. “Just do not ask until my head stops throbbing.”

“We had a disagreement,” Sirius said. “It was an accident, I swear it, Severus.”

“What was an accident?” Sam asked as he snapped open his bag, taking a closer look at the gash on Solarin’s temple.

“She fell down the stairs,” Molly said. “And he is right, that bit was an accident. But the part where he scared the poor girl half to death so she backed away from him towards the stairs was entirely his fault.”

Dorian took a flying leap off the swing Bill was pushing him on and ran over. “Mummy, does it huwt?”

“Yes, it hurts, but Uncle Sam is going to make it all better,” she said as Bill caught sight of the blood and tried to strangle Sirius. “Oh, for the love of Merlin! I should have just kept it to myself! Bill, let go of him, right now!” Bill let go of the Animagus and Solarin dumped Dorian in his arms. “Behave yourself.”

She took a deep breath and gulped down the pain potion Sam gave her. “Right. I told Sirius something he didn’t want to hear, he lost his temper, I lost mine, I was stupid and fell down the stairs. Harry, Ron, Hermione, go back to playing with your children. Charlie, you push Nixie on the swings. Bill, go push Dorian on the swings. Severus, Remus, Sirius and Sam, you all stay here with me, I’ll explain. Everyone else, go have fun,” she ordered. They all took one look at the injured augur and went about their tasks.

Solarin explained, and, at one point, Severus and Remus both slapped Sirius around the head.

“Could it be true?” Remus asked as Sam finished patching the girl up.

“Yes. Question, why the hell do people have a hard time believing me when I tell them these things?” she said.

“Because it seems highly improbable,” Severus said.

“Not improbable,” Sirius said. “Impossible.”

“No such thing,” Remus countered. “There is no such thing as impossible. We live in a world of magic where men can get pregnant and the unimaginable just might happen. There is no impossible, only improbable.”

“Listen, I’m not telling you anything for sure, I’m just telling you what I found. Sirius is right, I could be wrong,” Solarin said.

“Why did you wait so long to tell me?” Sirius questioned.

She looked at him incredulously and then laughed. “I’m covered in bruises and you really have to ask that question? Why do you think I didn’t tell you?”

“Good point. Sol, I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt you, or scare you. I shouldn’t have lost it like that. I am so sorry.”

“Save it, it’s my own stupid fault. I shouldn’t have panicked like that. And I certainly shouldn’t have told you without Remus there.” She sighed. “Sirius, I tell you this because he’s your father. What you choose to do with the information is up to you.”

“But I don’t know what to do,” the Animagus replied.

She smiled. “You will.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Harry walked into his bedroom, expecting to find Severus, only to find it empty.

“Severus?”

A blindfold was gently held out in front of him. “What do you say to a game, love?” came his husbands decadently rich voice in his ear.

“What are the rules? You’re not going to tie me up, are you?”

“No, nothing like that. The only rule is that you are not allowed to take off the blindfold, and you have to answer any question I ask. How does that sound? You can say no, if you want to.”

Harry considered it, reaching out to run his fingers along the black silk of the blindfold. He trusted Severus implicitly. “You promise you won’t restrain me at all?”

“I cross my heart, love. Just the blindfold.”

“All right, but if I say stop, if I can’t handle it once the blindfold is on…”

“I won’t hesitate to stop. Remember, all at your pace. I won’t rush you, or force you. If you don’t like it once the blindfold is on, we’ll stop.”

“Okay.”

Severus kissed his neck as he slowly covered Harry’s eyes, gently tying it behind his head. “All right?”

“Yes.”

“Very good,” the older wizard purred as he unbuttoned Harry’s shirt, kissing his throat and chest as he exposed the pale skin. “Merlin, do you know how beautiful you are?”

Harry giggled. “I should, you tell me enough.”

“Oh no, never enough. I could never tell you enough,” he argued as he dropped the shirt and took Harry’s hands, leading him to the bed. He laid the petite being down and kissed his stomach as he pulled off his trousers, leaving his boxers in place.

Harry laid perfectly still as Severus slipped away, as he heard the rustle of fabric. “What are you doing?” he asked, his voice shaking.

“Relax, love. I’m not going to hurt you, I promise. It’s all part of the game. It’s something I saw, years ago, in an erotic magazine. I’ve always wanted to try it but never trusted anyone enough to share it with them. We can stop, if you’d like, but I promise it won’t hurt.”

“Okay. Will I like this?”

“I think so. You certainly enjoyed the silk and feathers. It’s not so different from that.”

Harry chuckled. Oh yes, he certainly had enjoyed the night where Severus had trailed lengths of silk and soft feathers over his skin, setting his nerve endings alight and exciting him beyond words. Then there was the night with the ice cubes. Harry had found out just how much fun it was to melt them on Severus’ skin.

“Is it like the ice cubes? Are we doing that one again?”

“Close, but not quite,” Severus said. “Are you ready?”

“I think so. As ready as I can be without knowing what you’re about to do.”

A slow guilty chuckle and then the bed dipped with Severus’ weight, the older man reclining by Harry’s side, leaning in to kiss him, so sweet, so gentle. And then there was something warm and soft trailing across his chest, circling one nipple and then the other, leaving a sticky trail in its wake.

“What is that?” Harry asked.

“How does it feel?”

“Warm, and sticky.” Harry giggled. “You haven’t come across my chest have you?”

“No. Care to hazard another guess?”

“Ummm. I have no idea. Give me a clue.”

“It’s something you eat. Something you, in particular, like to eat.”

“Ice cream?”

“No, but getting close. You said it was warm.”

“Oh, right. Not ice cream. Ummm…tea?”

“No. It’s a food.”

Harry smiled and then moaned as Severus began to lick whatever it was off his skin, closing his lips around a nipple to suck it off. He tangled his fingers in his silky hair, pushing his chest up towards Severus’ travelling mouth as he moved slowly across to the other nipple.

“Sweet Merlin,” Harry gasped. “Is it…oh…is it…ummm…is it…chocolate? Melted chocolate?”

“Very good,” Severus said as he finished cleaning his chest, joining his lips to Harry’s, letting him taste the confection. Harry hummed in enjoyment. “Ready for the next one?”

“Yes,” he said and Severus chuckled at his enthusiasm. Severus reached over him and Harry jumped as something cold and smooth was spread over his heated skin. “Now, what does this one feel like?”

“Ummm…cold, and smooth. It’s not as sticky as the chocolate.”

“Very good. Now, what is it?”

Harry found it hard to think as his lover began to lap it up, trailing his tongue and lips along the stripe of it down the middle of his chest and abdomen.

“Ummm…do we keep it in the fridge or the freezer?”

“Nice question. The fridge.”

“So, not ice cream. Ummm…is it yogurt?”

“Nope.”

Harry gasped as another spoonful was spread across his stomach, making an ‘S’ on his skin. It was thick, almost like ice cream, but Severus had said that it was kept in the fridge…

“Whipped cream?”

“Very good,” Severus hummed, scooping some up with his fingers and letting Harry lick it off while he finished devouring the cream off his stomach. “Next?”

Harry nodded and shrieked as something wet and icy was trailed across his skin. “Ice cube?”

“No.”

“Ice cream?”

“Not this time.”

“Fridge or freezer?”

“Fridge.”

“Ummm…some kind of fruit?”

“You’re getting very good at this,” Severus said as he licked the sticky juice off Harry’s skin, feeding the strawberry to his lover. “I only have one more. I did think it would take you longer to guess.”

Harry laughed. “Do I get to do it to you when you’re done?”

“Of course. I bought up enough for you to have a turn.”

“Brilliant. Okay, I’m ready for the last one.”

Severus chuckled. He had thought Harry would refuse as soon as he saw the blindfold, and, once again, he was amazed at how much trust Harry showed him.

“How does this one feel?” Severus asked as he dribbled the last one across Harry’s whole torso, watching as it dripped down to the waistband of his boxers.

“Cold, this one is cold too. And wet, more liquid than the others. Was it always liquid?”

“No, it melted.”

Harry grinned. “Ice cream. Pistachio, that’s your favourite. Or it might be chocolate orange, that’s my favourite.”

“Pistachio. I’m impressed,” the older man said as Harry pulled off the blindfold. He smiled at him and bent his head, licking the desert off his husband, cleaning the area thoroughly, making Harry squirm and moan. When he was done, he surged forwards, covering the lithe body with his own, and kissed him, slipping his tongue into Harry’s mouth as the younger man wrapped his legs around his waist. He pulled back and stared down into the bright green eyes. “Are you all right, love? I can move if you want.”

“No, I’m okay. Don’t move.”

“What about your turn?”

“In a minute,” Harry said, pulling him in for another kiss. Just as their lips touched, the whole house shook as something below them exploded. “What was that?”

“I have no idea,” Severus said, easing himself off his lover and padding to the door.

“Severus?” came Sirius’ voice through the wood.

“Yes?” Severus answered after he took down the silencing charm.

“Something in your lab just exploded.”

Severus paled. “I’ll be right there!” he called as he began to shove his clothes back on. “Sorry, love. Your turn will have to wait.”

“It’s okay,” Harry said as he pulled on his own clothes. The two of them ran down the stairs and skidded to a stop at the door to the lab, which had been blown off its hinges. They cautiously walked inside and Harry heard Severus groan. 

“Oh, shit,” Severus said.

Everything was in ruins. Every potion was contaminated, every raw ingredient ruined, every jar, bottle and phial was shattered, every cauldron was melted. All that remained was a bloody mess.

“Harry, don’t come in. You don’t have any shoes on and there’s glass on the floor,” Severus ground out as she stepped on a piece, only now remembering that he, too, was barefoot.

“Sweet Merlin, what happened in here?” Solarin asked as she joined the crowd around the door.

“Have you been messing with my ingredients again?” Severus said, leaning against a wall to pull the glass from his foot.

“No, I swear. I haven’t touched them. I promise, Severus, none of the Odd Trio have messed with anything.”

“Could you have accidentally added something you shouldn’t?” Sirius asked.

“No, I don’t think so,” Severus said. “I couldn’t even tell you what it was that exploded.”

“Judging purely on the smell, I’d say it was polyjuice,” Solarin put in. “Did anything survive?”

“Oh, fuck!” Severus said. “The Wolfsbane. It’s ruined. Remus and Sam need to take their first dose tomorrow.”

“Can’t you buy it?” Harry asked.

“No, pup. It’s a specialist potion. No one stocks it. Severus is the only wizard in Britain who actually brews it. Very few werewolves actually take it. They say they do, but it’s just a smoke screen to hide how much they enjoy violence,” Remus said. “I could send off to a brewer abroad but it wouldn’t get here in time.”

“Couldn’t you go without it for this month?”

“It’s too dangerous, what with all the little ones in the house. What if the charms failed? What if me and Sam got loose? I couldn’t live with myself if something happened when I wasn’t myself, and I don’t think Sam could either,” Remus said. “We’ll have to call Albus. Maybe Sam and I can spend the time in the Shack. We don’t have any other option.”

“Maybe not. Or maybe you do,” Solarin said. “What time is it?”

“Just gone seven,” Sirius said.

She nodded and headed up the stairs. They followed her and watched as she convinced Dorian to stay with Bill before she donned her coat and headed out the door.

“Where is she going?” Harry asked.

“Knowing her, probably somewhere that would get most of us killed,” Bill replied.

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Albert Sofler was an apothecary in Knockturn Alley who specialised in potion ingredients that weren’t exactly legal, but he did stock many things that were hard to come by, which meant the Ministry not only turned a blind eye to his activities, they also used him as a snitch every now and again. He had both ears to the ground, and many friends in not so legal places.

Which made him one of Solarin’s best friends.

“Albert, long time no see.”

The blue haired, heavily pierced man spun around and clutched his chest, letting out a shaky laugh. “Are you trying to put me in an early grave?” he asked, pulling her into a hug.

“Now, now, if I wanted to do that, you’d already be six feet under,” she said. “Listen, Al, I kind of need some of your stock.”

“Come on in. I was just about to lock up and go home, but for you I’ll make an exception,” he said, pulling open the gate he was previously pulling closed. He unlocked the door and she trailed him in, taking in the smells and sights.

“So, how is business?” she asked, hopping up to sit on the counter.

“Not bad, can’t complain. So, what was it you were after? I have some pixie eyelashes. And some dragon ice pouches that just arrived this morning.”

“No, nothing like that, but I will pass that on to Severus, maybe he needs some of those. Actually, I was wondering if you still had a supply of Wolfsbane.”

He let out a low whistle through his teeth. “That’s a pretty rare order. I have to say, I don’t get much call for that one.”

“Severus had a little accident in his lab, the whole batch got ruined. I have a couple of friends who take the potion every month. We need some by tomorrow. You’re the only person I know who would stock it. Please don’t tell me you’re all out, because if you are, we’re screwed.”

“Flatterer.”

“I mean it. You’ve helped me out more than once. Come on, Al. Just tell me if you have it or not.”

“I have it. You’re one lucky little witch. Only got two bottles left. Yours for ten galleons each.”

She pulled out her purse. “Fourty. Twenty for the potion, twenty for your silence,” she said, handing over the money. He pulled the two bottles from the top shelf and she slipped them into her bag. “I owe you one.”

“Actually, you could help me with something. Two things, while I have you here. I had Lucius in here the other day. It was weird. He came in and walked around the shop and then he left.”

“That’s it? He didn’t say anything…buy anything…steal anything?” she questioned, examining one of the jars of… “What the hell is this?”

“Dried Puffskein tongues. Four for a galleon.”

“I’ll take eight. While I’m at it, a selection of your rarer ingredients. Hell, I might as well stock up while I’m here. I’m sure Sev can find a use for it all.”

He began to stock up a bit of everything, labelling each package as he wrapped it. “Nope, he didn’t say or buy anything, but he did steal a few things.”

“What did he steal?” she asked as she picked up a few unicorn horns to add to the pile.

“A jar of Augur Opiate, a jar of nutrient potion, and a jar of Amortentia. I would have called the Ministry, but, with my clientele, it wasn’t an idea I could entertain.”

“When was this? And why do you stock the Opiate?” she asked, keeping her voice casual even though her stomach lurched at the thought of that particular potion.

“A few clients of mine are trying to figure out an antidote to it. It could make them rich if they manage it and you know how my clients love money. So far no luck, but they keep using it up trying to figure it out, so I have to keep stocking it. Lucius came in two…maybe three nights ago. I’m not sure what to make of it but I thought you might want to know.”

“Thanks, I’ll pass it on to the right people,” she said, organising the potion ingredients into a manageable pile. “What was the other thing?”

“Well, one of my suppliers gave me something but I have no idea what it is or what to do with it.” He pulled out a mirror from beneath the counter and handed it to her.

“How did your supplier get this?” she said, stroking her fingertips over the smooth surface, caressing the carved gold frame.

“No idea. What is it?”

“It’s a scrying glass. They’re specially made for augurs. No one but an augur could use one.”

“You want it?”

“Sure. How much?”

“For you, free. I got no other use for it. Please, take it off my hands. As for the ingredients, a hundred and ten galleons for the lot.”

She paid up and gathered up the packages before walking out of the store and making her way to the Leakey Cauldron. On her way, she popped into the potions supply store and purchased a few jars to store the new ingredients in.

The whole way home, she felt her mind churning. Albert had given her much more than just rare ingredients and an old mirror. He had given her one hell of a headache.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

“Whewe’s mummy?”

“I don’t know, Dorian, but she’ll be back soon,” Bill said, hugging his son close.

“But I want hew hewe now.”

“I know you do.” Bill looked up at Severus. “This is ridiculous. She said she’d be home an hour ago. Where is she?”

“I don’t know. Can’t you get her through the connection?” Severus asked.

“No.” He stopped talking as the front door slammed. “Oh, thank Merlin.”

“Sorry! Sorry! I know I’m late,” Solarin said as she breezed through the kitchen door, handing her packages off to Sirius, who dumped them on the table.

“Mummy!” Dorian cried, running to her to be scooped up.

“Hey, little man. I know, I’m late, I’m sorry. I got caught up.”

“It’s okay, mummy. Will you put me to bed?”

“Is it okay if daddy does it tonight? I kind of need to have a grown up talk with Uncle Severus.”

“Okay. Night mummy.”

“Night baby,” she said, kissing him on the forehead and handing him off to Bill, who kissed her and then disappeared out the door. “So, Albert says hi.”

“Albert? Albert Sofler, who owns the apothecary in Knockturn Alley? Bill was right, anyone else would not have come back in one piece,” Severus said. “How is Albert?”

“Not bad. I nearly gave him a heart attack. He didn’t hear me coming. You know, he is a saint of a snitch.”

“Who’s Albert?” Harry asked.

“He’s this wizard I went to school with. Owns an apothecary in Knockturn Alley. He stocks some of the less…legal ingredients available, and some pretty specialised potions. Anyway, the Ministry turns a blind eye to his business because he’s a first class sneak. Albert, as I said, is a saint of a snitch. Look what he had in stock,” she said, pulling the two bottles of Wolfsbane from her bag and setting them on the table. “You owe me twenty galleons, ten each.”

“And the packages are?” Severus asked as Sam and Remus paid up, each hugging her and kissing her on the cheek, calling her a lifesaver.

“Some of Albert’s rarer ingredients and jars to store them in. You owe me a hundred and ten galleons, and that doesn’t include the jars. Those cost me seventy. Say thank you.”

“Thank you.” 

Severus began to pour over the purchases, letting out little hums of approval every now and again at each particularly rare item. She sat at the table and sipped at a cup of tea, wondering how to approach the subject of the mirror in her bag, and what Lucius had stolen.

“Severus?” she began, keeping her tone casual.

“Yes?” he replied, holding a bottle of saffron sap up to the light to admire the clarity of the liquid.

“Do you remember that mirror mum had made for me, the one that arrived the Christmas after she died?”

“Yes. You tried to smash it when you were seven.”

“What did you do with it?”

“It’s in my trunk upstairs. Why? Are you thinking of using it again?”

“No, no. I was just wondering if you still had it.”

“Yes, I still have it. So, how about you stop skirting around the issue and tell me what is on your mind,” the elder Snape said, looking at her with a small smile.

“You know me so well. Which do you want, the bad news or the weird?”

They all looked nervously at her. “The bad news,” Harry said. “Best to get that over with.”

She smiled. “Good point. Albert got robbed. Lucius stole three bottles. One nutrient potion, one of Amortentia, and one of Augur Opiate.”

“Wait. Opiate? Why the hell does he even stock it?” Severus asked worriedly.

“A few of his clients want to make their fortunes by being the first to discover an antidote to it. He stocks it because they keep using it up.”

“Why would Lucius steal those three?” Sirius questioned.

“No idea, but it leads into the weird news. Is Mad-Eye at home?”

“I’ll go get him,” Molly said, disappearing out the door. Solarin sat in silence as they waited for her to return, letting her mind wander.

“I hate it!”

Severus caught the scrying glass as Solarin threw it across the room. “Solarin, please don’t throw things, it’s not nice,” he said. Mad-Eye sat on the sidelines, staying out of it.

“I don’t care! I hate it and I’m never using it again!” the girl screamed, Severus barely getting the glass out of her line of fire as she threw a bolt of lightning at it.

“Solarin, it is not the fault of the mirror that you saw that, and it is not your fault that we couldn’t stop what happened. You told us all you could, you couldn’t have done anymore than that.”

“I don’t care. I hate that glass and I am never looking in it again.” She looked at the glass and broke down into tears. “It’s not fair. Why can I see the future if I can’t change it?” she sobbed.

Severus placed the glass on the table and scooped her up, holding her close. “Sweetheart, calm down, please. No one’s going to make you look into the glass again. But I won’t let you smash it. I will put it somewhere safe.”

“Why? Why can’t I just get rid of it?”

“Because mum had it made for you, and I promise you that, one day, you will want it again. I know you can’t see it right now, but that mirror is special, just like you. I know that this gift of yours is difficult, that it doesn’t always seem like a gift. But it is.”

“I miss her,” she sniffled.

“I know. I miss Lily, too. But it’ll all work out, you’ll see.”

Solarin smiled softly. “You were right, you know,” she said, looking at her brother. “When I tried to smash my scrying glass and you told me it would all work out. You were right. It did work out.”

Severus smiled and rounded the table, hugging her briefly. “I told you it would.”

“I still miss her.”

“So do I, sweetheart, so do I. But at least we remember her.”

“Who?” Harry asked.

“Lily,” Severus said. “Her death was the last thing Sol ever saw in her own scrying glass.”

“After that, I refused to ever use it again, and I never have,” she said as Mad-Eye entered the room. “Mad-Eye, what happens to a scrying glass?”

“What do you mean?” the grizzled Auror asked.

“Well, I’ve never seen one in the shops. Where do you get them? What happens to them when the augur is finished with them?”

“The glass self combusts,” Mad-Eye said. “Each glass is made specifically for the augur, they can’t be transferred. They take four years to make and self combust the moment the augur dies. Why the sudden interest? You’ve always hated yours.”

“Albert gave me this. He didn’t know what else to do with it,” she said, pulling the glass from her bag. “It looks like a scrying glass to me.”

Mad-Eye took the glass and examined it. It was about the size of a dinner plate. The frame had been melted so that all the original decoration was missing, and the glass was cracked in places. Severus disappeared and returned a few minutes later clutching an almost identical glass.

“It’s beautiful,” Harry said as Severus put the glass on the table. “What happened to the other one?”

Mad-Eye took the damaged glass from Solarin and looked it over as Solarin began to explain her own glass to the others around the table.

“The three women carved into the frame are the fates from Greek mythology. In the myth, the fates were three women who shared one eye and could see all, the past, the present and the future. When a mortal reached the end of their life, the fates would pull out the thread of life and cut it with scissors. When I was little, Mad-Eye told me the wizarding angle to the myth. The fates were three augurs who refused to give up their powers when they crossed over, and were cursed to control life and death and time for all eternity,” Solarin said. “The nine runes around the edge are supposed to focus the augurs power, as are the crystals.”

Harry picked it up and looked at it. “There’s no reflection.”

“No, it’s not that kind of mirror, love,” Severus said. “A scrying glass is literally a window into another time, another place. Do you remember when Solarin had the vision about Tobias?”

“Yes.”

“It’s sort of like that. When an augur uses a glass like this, they literally cease to see this moment. All they can see is what the mirror shows them.”

“Oh, I get it.” Harry turned the mirror over and ran his fingers over the back. “It has Sol’s name on it, her married name. Did it change?”

“Yes,” Mad-Eye said. “The mirror is attuned to the augur. It changed when she married Bill.”

“Will Miri get one?” Remus asked.

“Depends on Harry,” Mad-Eye said. “A scrying glass cannot be made without the mother’s permission, or, in this case, the carrier.”

“Why does it need the carrier’s permission?” Sirius asked.

“Because of how a glass is made.” Mad-Eye sighed and placed the glass on the table, looking over at Solarin’s glass and then at her. “You were too young to remember it, but you were involved in the making of that glass. To make a scrying glass, you have to start with the magical essence of the augur. Her blood. It takes six pints of blood from the augur to make one mirror.”

“Taking that much blood would render her unconscious, even dead,” Sam said. “More likely dead.”

“That’s why it’s not taken all at once. The first taking of blood is used to temper the glass. Sand is heated with some of the blood until it is clear. Then, it’s spread out thin. After that, it is heated and cooled, over and over and over again for a year. The glass is unbreakable, it has to be. When the augur uses it, it’s put under enormous pressure. Once the glass is ready, it’s coated with a varnish of the blood and then the silver, to aid the connection to another time. The silver also has blood added to it. That is stage one, and it takes up about two pints of blood all in all.”

“What’s stage two?” Jack asked, fascinated by the whole thing.

“Stage two is the preparation of the crystals. The crystals are boiled in a reduction of the augur’s blood, about two pints of it. There are nine different crystals: amethyst, beryl, carnelian, clear quarts, labradorite, malachite, obsidian, ruby and topaz. They’re chosen because they aid connection, give protection, ease emotional blocks and aid visions. They’re boiled in the reduction until they absorb the magical signature of the augur. End of stage two.”

“And stage three?” Molly questioned.

“Stage three is the preparation of the gold frame. The gold is melted down and mixed with another two pints of blood and then boiled until all the blood has been worked in. Then the gold is poured into a mould, the frame cooled and the crystals and glass set into the allotted spaces. The augur’s name is carved into the back of the frame and the remaining off-cuts are incinerated.”

“So, what happened to that one?” Phoenix asked, pointing at the damaged glass.

“I have no clue. I’ve never seen anything like this. I didn’t know something like this could happen,” Mad-Eye said. “Where did Albert get it?”

“He didn’t tell me the specifics. He just said that one of his suppliers didn’t know what to do with it and asked if I knew,” Solarin replied as Bill returned, sliding into a chair and pulling her onto his lap. “Is he asleep?”

“Out cold. How come you’ve never shown me your mirror?” Bill questioned, admiring the shine of her long dark waterfall of hair against the pale skin of his freckled arm.

“Because I don’t use it. I haven’t even thought of it in years.”

“Will you use it again?” Ron asked.

“I don’t know. That’s a decision that will take some time on my part. Where’s Hermione?”

“Asleep. The twins take it out of her. Speaking of which, I should probably go and get some sleep. Night all.”

Slowly, other members of the family drifted out of the room, headed for bed, until only Solarin remained.

She sat at the table staring at her own scrying glass, trying to figure out her next move. She had a feeling that she wouldn’t like where all the clues were leading. She had so many questions. Why did Lucius need Opiate? Who was the Amortentia intended for? What did the damaged mirror mean? Where was this help they were all waiting for?

“Can’t sleep?”

Solarin jumped and shattered the fruit bowl sitting in front of her as a voice spoke from the doorway. She looked up to find Remus smiling apologetically.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you,” he said. “If you’d like privacy or solitude, I can go somewhere else.”

“No, it’s all right. Where’s Sirius?” she questioned as she repaired the bowl with a wave of her hand.

“Asleep. I drugged him with Dreamless Sleep. I see no sense in both of us being awake and restless. Besides, there’s only so many times we can make love before he’s all loved out,” Remus said as he poured himself some tea.

She sniggered and then sighed as he took a seat opposite. “Remus, can I ask you something?”

“Anything.”

“Are you…I mean, do you…ummm….shit, this is coming out all wrong.”

“Take a deep breath and start over,” he recommended.

“Are you okay? I mean, about Dorian. We adopted him so soon after your miscarriage and I just wondered if you were okay with it.”

He smiled. “Can’t you sense that from me?”

“Well, yes, I can, but I don’t like to pry,” she said, blushing. “I try to stay out of things that aren’t really my business, things that might be private. Just because I can read a mind, doesn’t mean I should.”

“A wise course, with gifts like yours. And, to answer your question, yes, I am all right about Dorian. I assure you, I harbour no ill feeling about his adoption and neither does Sirius. It’s not like you and Bill moved out and holed yourselves up in some little flat and never let anyone see Dorian. I think I spend as much time with your son as you do, so it is perfectly all right,” Remus assured. “I do have a question of my own.”

“Ask it.”

“Did you know? The baby, the reasons why I wanted it so much. Did you know?”

She stared at the wood of the table, not meeting his eyes. “I didn’t mean to snoop, but you were thinking it so often, and so loudly, I couldn’t help it. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have poked my nose in. It wasn’t any of my business.”

“It’s all right, I understand. I told him, you know. Sirius. I told him in the end.” He chuckled. “Well, I didn’t have to. He figured it out for himself. I must admit that I did feel so much better when he finally knew the truth.”

They were silent for a while, before Solarin surprised Remus with her next question.

“Is it true that his father beat him when he started dating you?”

“Where did you hear that?”

“Anne.”

“Ah. Well, it’s partially true. Canis beat him when he refused to go through with an arranged marriage for me.” Remus sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. “I was always confused by Canis, to tell the truth. On the one hand, he acted like Sirius was his pride and joy. But then there was the other side of him, the side that practically disowned Sirius, that never made much sense. If your son is your pride and joy, you don’t treat him with such little respect.”

“Is Sirius still confused over what to do?”

“Oh, yes, very much so. He can’t quite decide what he wants to do.”

“Would it help him if he knew Canis went to your wedding?”

Remus stared at her in shock. Canis had gone to their wedding? Granted, the man had paid for it, though he hadn’t known that until afterwards, but Remus couldn’t remember the man being there. He remembered all the friends and family that had come, and quite a few people he hadn’t known at the time that had attended as a mark of respect, but he was certain Sirius’ father had not been there. None of Sirius’ family had been present except Andromeda, Ted and Nymphadora.

“Sol, Canis never came to our wedding,” Remus said steadily, watching as she smiled at him.

“You both wore muggle tuxedoes. There were white roses and lilies everywhere. The invitations were white with golden lettering and the envelopes had sterling rose petals in them. James’ father gave Sirius away. Tonks was your flower girl. Shall I go on? Or do you believe me now?”

“But…I don’t remember him being there.”

“Polyjuice. He appeared as a business associate of Mr Potter. He shook your hands.”

“Mr Wellington,” Remus breathed. He remembered now. He had been so confused by how emotional the man had been. “Why didn’t anyone ever tell us? And how did you know that?”

“Severus was marked a few weeks after you got married. I pissed Bella off…she wanted to play with my hair and I got annoyed and threw her across the room. Canis protected me from her…or was it her he was protecting from me?…Anyway, it was at Malfoy Manor. I sat on Canis’ lap and drew pictures. There was a house elf…what was his name? Dolly…Doory…something like that.”

“Dobby. The house elf was called Dobby,” Remus interjected.

“That’s it! Dobby. He sent Dobby for some ice cream for me. I didn’t have my little rules back then, I went into any mind I wanted. I went into his, I saw your wedding. I drew it. I met his other son, too. Can’t remember his name, but he looked a lot like Sirius.”

“Regulus, his name was Regulus. He died a few years later.” Remus let out a shaky laugh. “Incredible memory you have. That was years before you met any of us.”

She giggled. “Oh! I forgot I did that to you!”

“Did what?” he asked nervously.

“I met you before. Twice, in fact. Once when I was…oh, about two…maybe three…I must have been about three, Severus was going for his seventh year, so I must have been three. I wandered off from my mother, she was busy helping Severus with his trunk. You and Sirius found me wandering around the platform, helped me find my way. That was that first time we ever met, not the day I told you Harry had been found.”

“And the other time?”

“I was in Hogwarts, my second year. I went with Tonks and Bill to her house so she could get a jumper. You were there, having tea with her mother. You asked about Sam.”

“I remember that day, but I don’t remember you.”

“No, you wouldn’t. It’s a natural defence, something augurs do to protect themselves. I was, I am, very good at it. I make people forget that I was there. It’s a form of Obliviate but it’s very specific, very specialised. Miri will probably be able to do it as she gets older. Would you like me to undo it?”

“Go on then,” he said, not for a moment believing her. He had never heard of such a thing, but he was game enough to give anything a try once.

And then there she was, he could remember her, remember the way she had looked and talked and how it had felt to be around her. And he wasn’t surprised to find that it had felt exactly the way it did now: that, somehow, everything would work out, that the answers would come, that everything would fall into place exactly when it was supposed to.

“I remember you now.” He chuckled. “You were a tiny little thing.”

“You thought I was a werewolf at first.”

“Yes, I did.”

She smiled at him. “I should go to bed. Tell Sirius that the answer will come, when it’s ready to.”

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Ron walked into the Hogwarts library to find his wife completely hidden by her stacks of books. He smiled and crept up behind her, peeking over her shoulder.

“One of these days, your head will explode with all that knowledge,” he said, leaning in to kiss her neck.

“No it won’t,” she replied, tilting her head so he had better access. She allowed him to linger there for a moment before she craned her head for a kiss.

“So, what are you looking up now?” he questioned as he slid into a chair beside her.

“Augurs. Those mirrors are fascinating.”

“Ah. Found anything useful?”

“Not really. Well, lots of interesting things, but nothing relevant to the damaged mirror. Not to worry, I’m not done yet.”

“I don’t doubt that for a second. What time are you getting out of here tonight?”

“I don’t know…eightish, nineish…why?”

“No reason, just wondering. I have Quidditch, so I will come and collect you for dinner so you don’t forget.”

“Thanks. Oh, don’t forget the career planning with McGonagall this evening. You’re due to see her at six.”

“I won’t forget. See you in a bit.”

He kissed her cheek and walked away, his mind a turmoil. Before he had gotten married and become a father, Ron had been so sure of his path in life. He had wanted to be an Auror, like Mad-Eye. Like Harry had wanted. But now Ron didn’t know what he wanted, apart from knowing that he didn’t want to go tracking down dark wizards. Having spent some time around Mad-Eye, he just didn’t have the heart for such a profession. And he doubted Harry had the stomach, or the nerves, for it either. After his friends experiences, he doubted Harry wanted to do anything but hole himself up in Grimmauld Place for the next few years, at the very least.

Ron knew what his wife wanted. After meeting Sam Jones and his father, Hermione had decided that being a Healer was what she wanted. The only problem was neither of them felt comfortable dumping the twins on his parents, especially after all they had done so far for the babies.

Ron spent most of his Quidditch practice thinking about his future and the future of his family. Subsequently, it was Ginny who picked up the slack when he missed things. 

At six, as promised, he pried Hermione out of the library and sent her on her way to the Great Hall, her arms full of books to read while she ate, and he went to his career planning with his Head of House.

“Ah, Mr Weasley, come in and take a seat,” Professor McGonagall said when he poked his head around her open door. “How are things going?”

“Not bad, all things considered. Me and Hermione are both keeping up with the work, so everything is ticking over nicely on that front.”

“Good to hear. Now, I have had a word with your wife about her possible career as a Healer. I was wondering what your plans are. Do you still hold ambitions to become an Auror?”

Ron felt his ears turning pink. “Actually…no, I don’t. After everything that’s happened, I don’t think it’s what I want anymore.”

“That’s no problem. You are allowed to change your mind, you know. That is part of N.E.W.T. study, to decide on your future, while you still have the chance to change course. Have you given thought to what you would like to do? Is there anything you particularly enjoy and would like to do more of in the future?”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “There is one thing,” he admitted. Here it was, the vocalisation of something his brothers would probably niggle him about for the rest of his life. “I love being a father. I was wondering…well, it was just a thought…but, seeing as Hermione knows exactly what she wants…and I know how hard she’s going to have to work to get it. And I want her to have everything she wants, I don’t want her to have to miss out on her dream because we got ourselves in a sticky situation. I love my children, and so does she, but the timing could have been better. I was wondering if…if it was possible for me to stay home with the twins.”

“Just to be clear…you would like to be a stay at home parent while your wife was the main breadwinner rather than the more traditional roles of vice versa?” McGonagall questioned with a small, kind smile.

“Exactly. Is that even possible? I’ve never heard of the dad staying home instead of the mum before.”

“It is entirely possible. Unorthodox, but possible. If that is what you want to do, if you’re absolutely sure, then it’s not me you need to be talking to. It is your wife. Keep in mind that, even if you do go down this path now, you can choose a field of work later in life, perhaps when the twins are a little older, or when you find something that sparks your interest.”

Ron smiled. She hadn’t mocked him, or thought him a fool. She had listened, and told him he could change his mind. He thanked her and walked back to the room he shared with his wife, detouring to the kitchen on the way. He knew exactly what he wanted, and how to put a smile on Hermione’s face.

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Severus ducked as a pad of paper came soaring out of the library, followed by a frustrated growl.

“Something wrong?” he asked his annoyed father-in-law.

“No,” Sirius said. “Just my entire relationship with my father hanging on one letter that I can’t write is all. Just a little thing, not important.”

Severus smirked and took a seat, waiting for the Animagus to vent. It was surprising just how similar he and Harry were at times, like now. Both the Gryffindor’s liked to wade through the thick of their problems rather than talk it through, until they found themselves neck deep in them and had no other choice but to share.

“How the hell did you decide to deal with your father? I mean, he was right there, in front of you when you made that decision. Mine is Merlin knows where. All I have to do is put quill to parchment and I can’t even do that. How did you know what to say, how to act, what to do?”

Severus burst out laughing and it was several minutes before he could stop. “I didn’t decide to deal with him, my sister decided for me. I had no choice in the matter,” Severus said honestly. “But, in the end, I was rather glad she did make that decision. I was grateful for the choice she made. If nothing else, I had to see him through an adult’s eyes, for the sake of my marriage and my abilities as a father. It wasn’t just me I had to consider, nor was it just herself that Solarin had to consider. She had to take Bill into account, and I had to factor in Harry and Miri. Had I not dealt with him, I doubt I would be as calm as I am now.”

“So…what should I do?”

Severus smiled. Harry did that too; asking for someone to tell him exactly what to do so he didn’t have to make a difficult decision.

“I cannot tell you that,” Severus said calmly. “Only you can answer that question. When making that decision, I suggest looking to your own family. Remus, Harry, Phoenix, and all the rest of us. Decide what is important to you and if you really need the answers you’re looking for. If not, what is the reason for contacting him? If you do, the worst he can do with your letter is throw it in the bin. Either way, you will have an answer, whether it comes from you or him.”

And with that, Severus left him to his questions.

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“Okay…what did you do?” Hermione asked as she walked into the bedroom.

The room was awash with the glow of dozens of candles, casting flickering shapes on the rose petal covered bed, the champagne, the flowers, the chocolates. 

“Damn it, I thought I had longer before you came back,” Ron said as he emerged from their bathroom.

“What is all this for?” she questioned, putting her books on the floor, the only safe place.

Ron walked to her and took her in his arms, leaning in to give her a sweet kiss. “I ran you a bath. I put in bubbles and those fizzy things you like.”

“Bath salts,” she said, a little dazed by it all.

Ron smiled. “That’s the one. Bath salts.” He paused, obviously selecting his words carefully. “I know I don’t show you as often as I should, and I definitely don’t tell you as much as you deserve, but do I love you. I love you more than I ever thought I could love someone. And that’s why I did this…because tonight is a special night. I got you a gift.”

“All this is for a gift?”

“No, all this is to show you how much I care about you. The gift is the cherry on top.” He leaned in and kissed her once more, noting the ink spot by her right ear, the unruly mass of curls that was her hair after she had run her fingers through it a few thousand times, the crumpled mess formerly known as her skirt, and fell in love all over again. “I figured that, seeing as you gave me our two beautiful children, you deserved something extra special. So, that’s why I’m going to stay home.”

“Excuse me?”

“While you train to be a Healer…and all the stuff that comes after it. I’m going to stay home with the twins so you can follow this dream you have.”

Hermione couldn’t help it, she started crying. It was so unexpected, so out of the blue that he had taken her completely off guard.

“Hey…what did I do? Did I do something wrong?” he asked, wiping away her tears.

“No, nothing wrong. But…oh, Ron. How can you give up your dreams for mine?”

“What are you talking about?”

“You want to be an Auror.”

“No, I don’t. Not anymore. Not after all that’s happened. I had a good long think about what it is that I really want to do, what I really love doing. And what I love is being a father and a husband. So, that’s what I’m going to do. And what you want is to be a Healer, so…now you can.”

Hermione smiled and proceeded to strip him, dragging him into the bath with her.

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Harry was startled when Remus handed him a letter over breakfast. It was rare he got any mail, after the rest of the family screened it all that is. 

“What is this?” he questioned, scanning it. “What’s Future Week?”

“Let me take a look, love,” Severus said, holding his hand out for the letter. “Ah, I see. Future Week is a week of career planning with Heads of House. Because you and Nixie are home schooled, Minerva and Horace will be coming here to discuss options with you both.”

“What options?”

“Well, what do you plan to do after graduation? Did you have a particular career in mind, or are you undecided?”

Harry went silent. Life beyond Hogwarts, beyond N.E.W.T.’s, beyond Gryffindor. “I did want to be an Auror…but…”

“If you have changed your mind, pup, it would be all right,” Remus reassured.

“You’re allowed to make a different choice now,” Sirius agreed. “When you first thought of being an Auror, you didn’t have Miri, you weren’t married. You didn’t have the responsibilities and concerns you have now. Things change, people change.”

“I don’t want to be an Auror anymore,” Harry said quietly. “I can’t even stand the thought of it anymore. Tracking down wizards like Lucius? No thank you. I’d rather boil my eyeballs while they’re still attached.” They all chuckled at him. “But I’ve never given any thought to anything else. I don’t know what I want to do.”

No one was quite sure what to say to that. It was moments like these that really brought it all crashing down on them once more, just how damaged Harry still was.

“Why can’t Uncle Hawy stay home?” Dorian asked.

“What do you mean, baby?” Solarin questioned.

“Uncle Chawlie stays home, and Uncle Sevwus. And Uncle Wemus and Uncle Siwius. Why can’t he stay home like they do?”

“What would I write about?” Harry scoffed. “How to get into trouble at school?”

“Who says you have to write about anything?” Bill said. “You could be a stay at home parent.”

“What?”

“What Bill means is you could just take care of Miri until you decided what it is you do want,” Severus said. “Take a few years to relax, to find yourself again. There is no hard and fast rule that says you must work. Theoretically, the Potter fortune is large enough for you to be a man of leisure for the rest of your life, if you so choose.”

It was an interesting thought. Harry could envision it, spending all day every day for the next few years at home with Miri. No press to worry about, no career to deal with. Nothing but his family. Harry couldn’t in all honesty say he wasn’t incredibly enticed by the idea.

“Could I? Could I just stay home?”

“If you wanted to, pup,” Sirius reassured. “It’s your future, your decision. And no one says you must decide the rest of your life now. You can change your mind down the line.”

Breakfast continued on quietly for the most part. Dorian was finally beginning to lose his fear of the family never coming back, and only put up a token protest when various members headed off to work. As Severus and Harry moved to the sink to do the washing up (Molly had conveniently remembered that it was their turn) Severus noticed his lover was unusually quiet.

“Something on your mind, love?” the older wizard questioned as he rolled up his sleeves and plunged his hands into the hot water.

“Hmmm?”

“You’re awfully quiet over there,” Severus pressed as he handed him the first plate.

“I was just thinking,” Harry said as he picked up the tea towel and began to dry.

“Care to share?”

“I was just wondering…well, it’s not important really…but…”

“You’re babbling, Harry.”

“Do you like living here?”

Severus wasn’t quite sure where the question had come from; from his point of view, it had no obvious trigger. “I hadn’t really given it much thought, to be honest, but I suppose I do…sort of.” He paused, trying to select words that wouldn’t upset Harry. “Just out of curiosity…why do you ask?”

Harry chewed on his lower lip. “When he’s caught…I thought you might want to move, get our own place.”

Severus’ jaw dropped. He spluttered a few times. “Are you saying you don’t want to live here anymore?”

“No. Not saying that.”

Severus dried off his hands and pulled his husband to look him in the eye. “Harry, you have to explain, I’m confused. I don’t understand.”

Harry took his hand and they sat at the vacant table. “I just thought that’s what people did. Get married, have children, get their own place. I was wondering if that’s something you wanted.”

“Is it what you want?”

“You didn’t answer me.”

Severus sniggered. “All right, I see where this is leading now. You think I will bend my own will to suit you.” Harry blushed and Severus took it as agreement. “Harry, this is a marriage, not a dictatorship. If you want to move out, or if you want to stay here, you can say so. If we stay or go that will be a decision we both come to, together. Now, I will admit that this house has gotten rather crowded as of late, but strangely I don’t mind it as much as you might think I do. I’ve found that it’s rather nice to be surrounded by so many people. I’m not against moving, if you really want to, but I’m not adverse to staying either.”

“I don’t want to leave. Even after they catch him, I don’t want to leave. I like it here.”

“Then we stay.”

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Sirius sat down with a sigh. He had been pacing around the library for the last hour after screwing up countless pieces of parchment in his frustration.

He pulled a fresh piece of parchment and loaded his quill.

I wasn’t sure how to begin this letter. Father felt too friendly after all the time that has passed since we have spoken, and Canis felt off. Mr Black felt too formal, you are my father after all. So in the end I decided to dispense with a greeting and just begin writing, and hope that I manage to write the right thing.   
I’ve never been very good with words, always finding it easier to show someone how I feel or what I want or need than to tell them. But you can’t really do that in a letter. I suppose it explains why it has taken me so long to put quill to paper. It is, at least, part of the reason.  
The majority of my reasoning for waiting so long to contact you was that I wasn’t sure you would want to hear from me. It has been a long time and we didn’t part on the best of terms.   
I extend the olive branch. I would like to hear from you, but if that is not something you feel you can do, or it is something you do not want to do, please do not feel that you must. I just wondered if maybe you were waiting to hear from me.  
If you do wish to have contact, please contact Albus Dumbledore at Hogwarts. He will know how to get in touch with me.

Yours faithfully

Sirius Orion Lupin-Black.

Sirius sealed his letter and sent it off with Hedwig before he could change his mind.

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Harry awoke in the middle of the night to feel urgent hands sweeping over his skin. They pulled at his thighs and gripped at his wrists, urgent lips pressing against his shoulders and skimming down his chest, teeth scraping across his shoulder. He briefly noticed he was nude and his heart started to race. This was new and he didn’t like it. It was exactly the same as…

“Please…stop…please…please don’t…Lucius…no…please,” he begged and the hands stilled.

“Harry? Love, why are you naked?” Severus asked sleepily.

Harry rolled over and flicked on the bedside lamp. Severus blinked sleepily at him. 

“Harry, what’s going on?” Severus questioned.

“I woke up and I was naked and you were touching me. I mean…you were touching me…but not in the good kind of way you do…in the bad way he used to.” Harry couldn’t get his heart to stop racing and he couldn’t take a full breath.

“I was doing what?” Severus asked incredulously, holding Harry’s hand. “Harry, I was sleeping and then you were pleading and I woke up.” He stared at his young husband in confusion. “I…I am so sorry, love. I don’t remember doing that, I wasn’t even dreaming of you. I’m so sorry. Come on, love, lets get you dressed and then we’ll get Moody.”

“Why him?”

“Because I would never hurt you, I would never do anything to upset you. And I have never even thought of touching you in that way.”

“Oh.”

Harry pulled on his pyjamas in silence, averting his gaze from his husband. He couldn’t look at him, he just couldn’t. They had never needed to talk about their personal business with anyone. Harry couldn’t work out what was wrong. So Severus had touched him in his sleep, it wasn’t like he had hurt him. It wasn’t like Severus had done anything that bad. Not really.

“Severus?”

“Yes, love?”

“Are you mad at me?”

Severus froze in his reaching for the door. “Why on earth would I be mad at you?”

“I don’t know…I just figured you might be…he used to get mad at me.”

“When did he get mad at you?”

“When I asked him not to,” Harry whispered and suddenly he found himself in Severus’ arms.

“Oh, love. I’m not mad at you. Why on earth did you think I would be mad at you for telling me to stop? Have I ever gotten angry at you for telling me how you feel?”

“No…but you seemed mad, so I…I…”

“Harry, I was angry at myself for upsetting you.”

“Oh. So…you’re not mad at me?”

“No, not at all.” Severus tilted his head back and pressed a sweet kiss to his lips. “I could never be angry at you for telling me how you feel. Believe me, love, I’m not angry at you, not even a little bit.”

They made their way down the stairs, pausing to knock on Mad-Eye’s bedroom door, and then the three made their way down to the kitchen. Moody then proceeded to run several diagnostic spells on both Harry and Severus.

“Odd,” Moody murmured to himself.

“What’s odd?” Harry asked timidly.

“With your permission, I would like Solarin to join us,” the grizzled Auror. 

“I have no problems with that,” Severus said, though his face was bright red. “Harry?”

Harry nodded mutely and perched himself on the kitchen counter, avoiding Severus’ guilty gaze. The silence between them was almost unbearable.

“What the hell is going on?” Solarin questioned sleepily as she breezed into the kitchen, Moody trailing behind her. “Oh, I get it. You figured I could do with a little less sleep, because Dorian and his bad dreams let me lie in every morning.”

Harry couldn’t help it: he laughed. She grinned at him. Harry realised he had never seen her in her pyjamas before. Strangely, he was surprised by them. They were pink, with teddy bear print, and pink bunny slippers.

“Much better. Now, what’s going on?” she asked as she grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge.

“I attacked Harry in my sleep,” Severus whispered and she choked on the large gulp she had just taken.

“You didn’t attack me. It was nothing,” Harry mumbled.

“Okay…that’s a new one,” Solarin said. “Why was I woken?”

“Because I’m not quite sure what happened,” Moody said.

Solarin leaned against the counter, nodding and looking thoughtful. She kept muttering to herself, Harry catching words every now and again that didn’t make any sense. She peered at her brother for a few minutes, still muttering, and then at Harry, before her gaze landed on the floor.

“Right. Harry, can I have a little look inside your head, see what happened from your point of view?”

He nodded and she went very still for a few moments. “That’s…different,” she said. “Severus, hold still.”

“What, no asking my permission?” he joked.

“Nope. Hold still, stop squirming.” She went still and then went very pale, which scared Harry. He had never seen that before. “Mad-Eye, wake everyone. Now. Excuse me, I need to throw up.”

She ran from the room and Harry looked at Severus worriedly. “What did we do?”

“I don’t know, love.” Severus peered at his quiet spouse. “Come here, Harry, come and cuddle,” he said, holding his arms open. He smirked. “I promise not to maul you this time.”

Harry giggled and climbed into Severus’ lap, feeling those long strong arms come around him, the way they always did. He suddenly didn’t know what he had made such a fuss about. Severus would never hurt him, it just wasn’t in him. He snuggled into Severus’ chest, feeling gentle kisses being pressed to his hair.

“Are you all right?” Severus whispered.

Harry nodded and curled his fingers in Severus’ dressing gown. “I’m okay, I promise. Just confused.”

“Me too,” Severus agreed. “But Mad-Eye and Sol will figure it all out, I’m sure of it.”

“Do you want to go and check on her?”

Severus chewed his lip. He had wanted to, but Harry had seemed to need him more. But now…Harry was offering, after all. Just a few minutes? It couldn’t hurt, could it?

“Stop dithering.” Both Severus and Harry jumped as Solarin spoke from the doorway. “I’m fine.” Severus gave her a disbelieving look. “Honestly. I just wasn’t ready for what hit me.”

“Oh Merlin,” Charlie said, shuffling into the kitchen, closely followed by the rest of the family. “I just know that this can’t be something good. I mean, it’s the middle of the bloody night.”

“What time is it?” Sam asked.

“Just gone two,” Anne supplied. “So, what’s the big problem?”

Harry felt his face burn with embarrassment. “Do we really need to share this with everyone?” he whispered.

“Apparently it’s important to share it, pup,” Sirius said, a little pink himself. “So, what is so important?”

Solarin looked at him. “What do you know about the Fidelius Charm?”

“It hides us,” he said simply.

“It does more than that,” Remus said. “It stops magic getting through. Without it, Lucius could just perform a summoning charm and zoom Harry to him. Magic doesn’t get through the charm.”

“Close,” Mad-Eye said. “Most magic doesn’t get through, but not all. Solarin’s magic gets through.”

“Is that what this is about, the Fidelius?” Anne asked.

“No, not quite,” Solarin said, and then she sighed. “Severus, maybe Harry should go back to bed.”

“No!” Harry exclaimed. “I was the one who was…Severus, how did you put it?”

“Mauled.”

“That’s it, ‘mauled’ in my sleep, in my own bed, by my own husband. It wasn’t Severus, was it? That’s what you’re getting at.”

“Yes, Harry, that’s what I’m getting at. It wasn’t strictly Severus who was doing those things.”

“Was it Lucius?” Jack asked.

“Not strictly…”

“Would you please stop being vague and get to the bloody point!” Severus snapped.

“It was someone that Lucius is controlling. Someone I can locate, but Lucius is gone.”

“I’m confused,” Phoenix said sleepily from her perch on Charlie’s lap. “You’re saying Severus was…bewitched by someone being controlled by Lord Malfoy and you can find them, but he’s already gone so you can’t find him?”

“Exactly,” Solarin said.

“Right,” Harry said. “So…how do we stop this happening again?”

“It won’t.”

“But how can you be sure?”

“Harry, trust me, it won’t happen again.”

“But how do you know?”

“Harry, for fucks sake!” she yelled, losing her temper. “I know because…because the one who did this is an augur!” She slapped a hand over her mouth. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Harry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you, I’m sorry, you didn’t deserve that.”

Bill pulled her into a hug but she pushed him away and sank to the floor, curling up. “It’s an augur,” she whispered.

There was silence in the kitchen while they all processed it all. 

“I don’t understand,” Anne said. “I thought there was no other augur. I thought the only two in the world both live in this house. How can there be another?”

“I don’t know,” Mad-Eye said. “It shouldn’t be possible.”

Severus picked Harry up and rounded the table, sliding him into the safety of Sirius’ arms. “You all right, love?” he whispered.

“I’m okay. Is she?” Harry questioned just as quietly.

“I don’t know.”

Severus made his way across the kitchen, nodding at a worried looking Bill, laying a hand on his shoulder to offer comfort to the confused younger man. Severus knelt down in front of his sister, stroking her hair away from her face.

“Solarin, sweetheart, please talk to me,” he said. She shook her head and shoved his hand away. He smirked and pulled her into his arms. “You have two choices, young lady. Either you let me do my big brother bit and try to help or I will make your life hell for the next month. You may choose,” he said. She went absolutely still for a moment before she broke down, curling into his arms and letting him hold her while she cried. “Now, now, come on, it’s all right.”

“No, it’s not,” she argued. “I don’t understand, Sevus. My abilities have never been wrong before, never. But this doesn’t make any sense. I don’t understand.”

“None of us do. But Mad-Eye will find this supposed augur, and we will be able to get some answers.”

“But I yelled at Harry.”

Severus couldn’t help it, no matter how hard he tried. He laughed. “Solarin, I mauled him in my sleep tonight. Do you really think he cares about you snapping at him?”

“But I shouldn’t have yelled at him.”

“And you apologised for that. Look at Harry. Does he look upset with you?”

She peered around and her eyes landed on Harry, who was fighting to stay awake in Sirius’ arms. He smiled sleepily at her and waved.

“Sweetheart, what happened when you looked inside my head? And don’t tell me nothing, because I know you’re lying.”

Solarin squirmed and looked around the room. “It’s private,” she whispered.

“Private from your husband?” Bill questioned and she nodded. “Since when have we kept secrets?”

“Since this has nothing at all to do with you,” she said. “It’s between me and Severus.” She saw the hurt look on his face and sighed. [It’s about my mother.]

[Oh. Sorry, baby.]

[It’s okay. Just help me get rid of them all so I can talk to Severus alone.]

Bill cleared his throat. “Guys, maybe we should all be getting back to bed. It’s late and a lot has gone on tonight, we all need some rest,” he said diplomatically.

Most nodded and slowly trickled out of the kitchen, but Harry, Sirius and Remus stayed. 

“Harry, will you be all right staying with Remus and Sirius for a bit so I can have a talk with Solarin?” Severus questioned.

“Of course,” Harry said. “I’m fine.”

Severus stood and crossed the room, pulling Harry into his arms to give him a swift, sweet kiss. “I’ll be up soon, love.”

“Okay. I’ll be in Sirius and Remus’ room.”

Harry cast one more look on his husband before he let Sirius and Remus lead him from the room.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

In the end, Harry had slept between his parents as Severus had not emerged with Solarin until lunchtime. It had been a tense few days since the ‘Midnight Mauling’, as Harry called it. Solarin was edgy and irritable, Severus was confused, and Bill was feeling left out. Harry had gone back to his theory: if he needed to know, Severus would have told him.

Ron and Hermione arrived late on Friday night and Harry wasted no time in commandeering his two best friends. The three teens took their children and secluded themselves in Miri’s nursery, where Harry immediately recounted what he knew.

“So…Severus just started pawing you in the middle of the night?” Hermione asked, incredulous.

“I told you, it wasn’t really Severus. It was this woman controlling him,” Harry corrected, helping Miri to stand, which she was highly amused at.

“I know…but still. Harry, he practically…”

“Forget that bit,” Ron cut her off, bouncing Joseph on his knee. “What do we know about this woman?”

“Nothing,” Harry said. “Mad-Eye did find her, but she’s in a coma, which doesn’t help.”

“And you have no idea what Solarin was so worked up over?”

“None. I figure, if I was supposed to know, Severus would have told me.”

“I think we’re ignoring the real issue here. Can you sleep in the same bed as a man that attacked you?” Hermione pressed and Harry sighed. 

Harry felt he really should have seen this coming and asked only Ron to join him. Ron saw both sides, Hermione just saw the moral high ground.

“Hermione, he didn’t attack me.”

“Yes, he did! Harry, he practically assaulted you in your own bed! How can you just dismiss it?”

Harry sat back and let it all wash over him, ignoring her while she ranted. Best to let her get it out of her system and then expect a rational, logical response from her. He watched as Miri giggled at the irate young woman, watched Ron blush in embarrassment of his wife going off on one, and let it all fly past him. He honestly didn’t care. He and Severus had spent three hours talking it through, followed by a particularly long claiming which Harry had thoroughly enjoyed.

“Well? Aren’t you going to say anything?”

Harry looked up guiltily as Hermione questioned him. “Huh? Sorry, I wasn’t listening.”

Ron sniggered as Hermione looked scandalised. “What?”

“I said, I wasn’t listening. Hermione, you’re my friend, and I understand that you care, I really do. But me and Severus have already talked about this. In fact, the whole family have talked about this. Haven’t you seen the charms around my bed? The one around Severus’ neck? The one around my neck? I’m protected, it won’t happen again, and it wasn’t technically Severus doing it to me. I told you, it was this woman, who Lucius was controlling, that took control of Severus’ body to try and get to me. Now, can we please focus?”

The teen deflated slightly. “Oh. I…ummm…I’m sorry, Harry.”

“It’s okay. You’re showing you care, I get it. Just…can we please try and figure out how I tell McGonagall that I changed my mind?”

“About what?” Ron asked.

“Being an Auror. I don’t want to do it anymore, and she’s coming here tomorrow to talk to me about my future. What do I say?”

“The truth,” the redhead said simply. “That’s what I did. I’m waiting for her to tell my mum, and then watch my brothers crucify me for it.”

“I’m confused,” Harry said. “What are you talking about?”

Ron sighed. He really hated words sometimes. “Well…Hermione wants to be a Healer, and I don’t really know what I want to do anymore. I don’t want to be an Auror, I just don’t have the stomach for it anymore. So…I’m…well…I’m going to stay home with the twins.” He finished in a rush, his ears turning red.

Harry couldn’t have stopped his smile, even if he wanted to. “Really? That’s what I’m going to do.”

“What?” Ron questioned, his head shooting up from his examination of the carpet.

“I don’t want to do anything, so I’m going to stay home. This is brilliant! We can stay home together! Oh. I mean…sorry, I assumed you were going to stay here after…well, after they catch him.”

“We don’t really have any plans to move out anytime soon,” Hermione said, retrieving Miri’s stuffed snitch for her. “That is, if you don’t mind putting up with us.”

“Of course not. I’d love you to stay.”

“So, me and Harry will stay home and play with the babies all day while Hermione spends the next Merlin knows how many years with her head stuck in even more books. Sounds good to me,” Ron said.

“Indeed,” said Remus from the doorway. “I’ve been sent to tell you that dinner is ready and that the three of you need your ears checked. Mum’s been calling you all for the last fifteen minutes.”

“Oops,” Harry said. “Sorry, Remus.”

Remus chuckled. “Just get your backsides downstairs before she bursts a blood vessel.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Saturday morning brought the Hogwarts teachers through the floo and Harry sniggered as Ron bolted from the room.

“Did I miss something?” Severus whispered in his ear, nipping at the lobe.

“You’ll see. Just…can you keep Bill from crucifying him?”

“Should I understand that reference?”

Harry leaned in and kissed him. “You will.”

The teachers sat down to enjoy a cup of tea and talk to the parents around the table of the future plans they had heard of. Everyone was highly impressed at Hermione’s plans to become a Healer and barely surprised at Harry and Phoenix deciding to stay at home. And Severus nodded in understanding as Professor McGonagall revealed Ron’s plans.

“He…what?” Molly asked after a shocked silence.

“Mr Weasley has decided to be a stay at home parent rather than pursue a traditional career path,” Minerva repeated.

The room lapsed into silence once more.

“Well,” Arthur said. “Well.”

“That’s…” Molly said.

“I don’t see the problem,” Fred said.

“What?” Percy argued. “He’s giving up his future!”

“Oh, shut your hole, Percy,” George retaliated. “Ron is making his own decisions. He doesn’t know what he wants to do yet, so he’s going to take the pressure off mum and dad and Hermione and everyone else until he does decide. You didn’t seem to have a problem with Harry making the same decision. Why is Ron any different?”

“Because he can do more than just change nappies!” Percy ranted. “Harry has real reason to want to stay home, so does Phoenix. Ron doesn’t. He’s bright, he could have any career he wanted.”

“And, when he wants one, he will,” Fred said. “He’s not giving up his future, he’s just putting it on hold for a while. Personally, I think Ron is very brave, doing what he wants instead of what some think he should do.”

“I agree,” said Charlie. “We all got to make our own choices on how to live our lives, why shouldn’t he?”

“Exactly. Ron deserves to choose his own life. Just because he’s the youngest Weasley boy doesn’t mean he doesn’t know his own mind. He is perfectly capable of making his own decisions,” Bill agreed.

“How about you all shut up and let the man himself speak?” Tonks said, motioning to where Ron was hovering in the doorway.

Ron came forwards as he was spotted, his face bright red.

“How can you do this?” Percy asked pompously. 

“Oh, shut up, Percy!” Hermione screeched. “You don’t know what you’re talking about!”

“Shut up, all of you!” Ron roared. “Just shut up! I’m staying home with the twins while Hermione trains and sets up her own career. That’s my decision, that’s what’s best for MY wife and MY children and ME. That’s all there is to it and I don’t want another word about it from any of you. I’m seventeen years old, I can make my own choices about my life. So…just…just shut it.”

With that, he stormed from the room and his brothers lapsed into silence.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

“Feel up for a talk with your old man?”

Ron looked up from his contemplation of his pillow to see his father standing in the doorway. “You come to pass judgement, too?” he asked miserably and Arthur smiled.

“Nope. Just thought my son could do with some time alone with his father. I know we don’t get much of it in this family.” Arthur sat down on the edge of the bed and sighed. “I’m sorry. We should have kept our mouths shut.”

“No, it’s not that,” Ron said. “Somehow, I thought that the worst I had to look forwards to was my brothers using me as the butt of their jokes for a few weeks. That I could have handled. I’m used to being the joke, we’re brothers, we do it all the time, fair game and all that. But having Percy talk about me like that…as if I’m some little kid who needs his blessing. It was so much worse than being the joke. It was mortifying. In front of my wife as well. She’s the one I’m always trying to impress, even though she’s my wife and she has my name and all that. I still want to be the guy she’s proud to be with, the best one for her.”

Arthur sighed. He thought back to try and figure out why Percy had turned out so pompous. He had always been a little tense, a little too sure that he was right, but Arthur had always assumed it would turn into confidence as his son grew. It turned into confidence all right, oh boy did it. He was proud of all his children, and he loved them dearly, but sometimes Percy really tested him as a parent.

“Do you think I’m screwing things up?” Ron whispered.

Arthur almost missed the question. He hadn’t been expecting it. “No, I don’t. I think you’re doing what you feel you need to, what is right for you. Charlie was right. All your brothers got to make their own choices, you should be no different. Just tell me…this is what you truly want, isn’t it? This is what is going to make you happy?”

“Yes.” Ron sighed. “I can’t explain it.” He sniggered. “Maybe I don’t have to. You’re a dad, you must know how I feel. When I see my children smile, I just stop and watch and think ‘I did that. I made this whole little person.’ And it kind of makes my head spin, and makes me feel kind of weak with all the responsibility. But I love it, having these little people depend on me. And waking up next to Hermione every single morning is the best thing in the world. Seeing her so absorbed in her books makes me fall in love with her all over again. I love being a husband and a father. Why is it so important that I do something else when I already know what makes my life complete?”

Arthur smiled. “It’s not important, not really.” He stroked his sons hair away from his eyes. “You know, sometimes I look at the seven of you and I’m amazed that you’re not little anymore. It went by so quickly. I look at Ginny and get the shock of my life to realise that she’s all woman-shaped. And Bill…he’s a father. My wild card curse breaker son is a father. Charlie…well, I didn’t know he could be so sweet. Fred and George, who I thought would amount to some low paid job or end up in jail for a prank gone wrong, have their own business. Percy is the only one who followed in my footsteps and I doubt he’s happy doing it, but it is what he chose. And then I look at you. My little boy is all grown up. I remember the way you used to trail after me, begging me to lift you up so you could see what I could. And then I turned around one day and realised you were the one showing me. I don’t think I really realised just how adult you are until this morning.”

Ron sat up and pulled his father into a hug. 

“No matter how old I get, I’ll still need my dad.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Severus awoke in the pitch black of his bedroom to the feel of urgent hands sweeping over his warm flesh, leaving a trail of excited nerve endings in their wake. He moaned as a hot wet mouth sealed around a nipple and suckled.

“Harry,” the Potions master moaned, reaching for his young lover. But Harry grabbed his wrists and pinned his hands to the pillow beside his head.

“No,” Harry said, his voice much too loud and harsh in the silence of the room. 

Severus tried to fight him, protesting the harsh treatment, not understanding what was happening. He tried to free his hands, writhing on the bed as Harry pinned him to the mattress with his whole body, his clear erection pushing into Severus’ stomach. But Harry just pressed harder, Severus’ hands beginning to go numb from the pressure on his wrists.

“Harry, what the hell are you doing?” Severus hissed.

The younger man growled a sound of pure frustration, apparently at the fact that Severus was fighting him. He leaned down and kissed Severus, hard and full, snaking his tongue into the older wizard’s mouth and robbing him of any ability to fight. Severus went limp and pliant beneath him as he poured everything into the kiss, telling his husband everything he wanted to know without actually saying a word.

And, all at once, Severus understood: Harry had had another nightmare, and he needed this. Harry needed control over his body, over Severus. 

“All right, love, I understand. You need to be in control, I get it. Just tell me what you need,” Severus murmured when Harry pulled back for air.

Harry went unnaturally still for a moment before he surged forwards and kissed Severus hard again, nipping at his lower lip, drawing blood. Severus hissed in surprise. This was not what he had come to know or expect from his lover. This Harry was hard and demanding. 

This Harry had sharp edges.

Severus laid perfectly still while Harry divested him of his pyjama bottoms.

“Don’t talk,” Harry murmured. “And don’t touch me. I want this, I want you, and I want it my way. Now, any problems with that?”

Severus opened his mouth to answer and then remembered Harry’s first rule. No talking. So he closed his mouth and shook his head, making Harry kiss him again, more gently this time. Severus reached up and curled his fingers around the bars on the metal headboard, trying to remember to breathe as Harry renewed his oral exploration of his body. That hot moist mouth travelled first to his neck, raising love bites Severus didn’t even want to hide come morning. Then, down to his nipples, teasing them to stiff pebbles, sharp teeth nipping at the hardened nubs. Those soft lips trailed down his abdomen, a hot wet tongue dipping into his navel and teeth scraping along the skin of his taught stomach muscles.

Harry licked the smooth skin, dipping down to bite at the protruding hip bones. His hands reached up to tug at his husbands nipples, pulling hard enough to make Severus gasp and arch his back up, his chest following the delicate hands as they moved off, slipping downwards.

To Severus, it seemed as if Harry’s hands were everywhere at once. They slid over his stomach, slipped down to stroke his thigh, reached under him to squeeze his buttocks. He bit his lip to keep from moaning, but he knew that if Harry kept on like this, kept teasing him so unmercifully, controlling him so commandingly, he would have no choice but to make noise, and lots of it.

Harry paused with his hand wrapped around Severus’ member. “You know, when I said no talking?” Severus nodded, not trusting himself to open his eyes or unclench his jaw or thighs. “Well, I didn’t mean you couldn’t make any noise at all. I know you’re trying to stay silent. And you don’t have to. You can moan if you want to.”

“Oh, thank God,” Severus moaned, but it sounded a lot more like a sigh of relief.

Harry leant down and kissed Severus’ lower stomach, just above his pubic mound. For a moment, Severus felt for sure Harry was going to suck him, but that didn’t fit in with the game they were playing. This was about Harry’s control, Harry’s pleasure, and receiving a blowjob wasn’t in the script. Sure enough, Harry slid up his body, invading his mouth with his tongue, straddling his hips.

Severus threw back his head and gasped as Harry wrapped his hand around his shaft once more, this time his hand slick with lubricant. He panted as Harry stroked him, coating him from root to tip. And then the hand was gone and Severus managed to bring his body under enough control to open his eyes.

And there it was, the most beautiful debauched sight in all the world, magical or otherwise: Harry was lust incarnate, his lips swollen and bloodstained; his emerald eyes glazed over with desire and need; one hand tugging at his nipples while the other was dipped between his legs, his own slick fingers pumping into that tight heat. His hips moved in time to the movement of his fingers, his breath coming in short sharp gasps, as the hand on his nipples shot out to land on Severus’ chest. It slid up to curl around the back of his neck, pulling him up to ravish his mouth with a kiss filled with heat and need and tongue.

Severus tangled his fingers in the sheets, trying desperately not to reach up and touch his young lover while still trying to remember to breathe through his nose. 

He was so caught up in the incredible feelings Harry was forcing from his body that he didn’t notice Harry moving until he sank down onto him. Severus actually screamed at the sudden tight heat around his aching member. He fell back onto the mattress, his hands reaching up to grip the headboard once more as Harry fell still on him, resting in the cradle of Severus’ hips.

All too soon for the Potion Master’s sanity, Harry began to move, hard determined thrusts down onto him, his hands reaching out to tangle in Severus’ hair. The Slytherin couldn’t feel anything but the incredible pleasure Harry was forcing from him. Faster and harder Harry moved, sweeping Severus up in the hurricane of his need. Higher and hotter, wilder and more frantic, until Severus couldn’t have told anyone his own name. Harry kept kissing him, kept gripping at his hair, and his knuckles were white from the pressure of his grip on the ornate metal bars of the headboard.

Finally, after what seemed like hours of delicious torture at the hands of his little Gryffindor, Severus felt the heat in his body condense down into the pit of his belly, his balls drawing up, and he noticed the frantic movements of Harry on him. He managed to open his eyes just a little, just enough for him to see the tears running down Harry’s face. His slim slender fingers were buried in his own hair, his swollen lips parted to emit breathless gasps of pleasure, his lust clouded eyes staring down at Severus with an intensity that robbed him of breath. 

Severus managed to release one of his hands and tentatively stroked a finger down Harry’s weeping erection, trying to both obey the rules Harry had laid out and help him finish. The sprite’s hand shot down and wrapped Severus’ hand around himself, reaching up to tug at his other hand and shoving it between his thighs. Severus did as he was silently ordered, stroking the hard shaft, massaging the little nub, until Harry pulled him up, crashing their mouths together.

Their world exploded in a fiery blast of heat and need and relief. They screamed into the kiss, each thrust of Harry’s hips down onto his husband forcing ejaculate to spill from Severus into his young lover’s body.

Severus collapsed onto his back, his lover falling onto his chest, the two of them sweat soaked and gasping. When he could manage it, Severus tentatively cleared his throat.

“Are you all right, love?” he whispered.

“Yes,” Harry gasped. “Severus?”

“Hmmm?”

“Hold me?”

Severus kissed the dark, messy hair and wrapped his arms around the slim body, reaching up to tenderly sweep Harry’s fringe away from his eyes.

Hours later, when the sweat had dried and the sky was beginning to lighten, Harry finally spoke.

“I’m sorry.”

Severus, who had been dozing while waiting for Harry to be ready to talk to him, startled awake and kissed his lover’s hair. “What on earth for?”

“Jumping you…making you do it all my way…using your body to make myself feel better,” Harry said and Severus was shocked to feel hot tears branding the skin of his chest. “I’m so sorry.”

Severus rolled them so they were on their sides, reaching up to cup Harry’s neck and pull him in for a kiss, slipping his tongue inside and pulling the sprite into a hug. 

“Hush, love,” Severus soothed when he pulled back, kissing the tears dripping down Harry’s face. “Don’t cry, come on, don’t cry.”

“But…I-I shouldn’t have used you like that. It wasn’t fair. I was so harsh and it isn’t supposed to be like that when we claim each other.”

Severus sat up and conjured a glass of water, taking a sip to soothe his dry throat before handing it to Harry, who obediently sat up and began to sip it.

“Harry…do you feel that you, in some way, abused me? That you behaved badly towards me?”

“Yes,” the young wizard whispered.

Severus couldn’t help his smile. “Harry, love, please calm down. You didn’t, I swear it. You didn’t hurt me, you didn’t force me.” He smiled at his husband. “Do you think I didn’t enjoy it? Because I did. I enjoyed it immensely. Do you think I felt used by your rough love? I didn’t. Harry, I love you. And I enjoyed the, I admit, unorthodox wake up call.” Severus squirmed, debating his options, before making up his mind. “Harry, I’m not running out on you but I desperately need to relieve my bladder. I will be right back.”

Severus kissed Harry’s unresponsive lips before he sped from the room, hurrying naked along the hallway to the bathroom. He relieved himself and washed his hands, catching sight on himself in the mirror.

His throat and chest were littered by love bites, blood stained his lips where Harry had bitten through the skin. His chest and stomach were covered in scratch marks. Not to mention the bruises covering almost every inch of him. “When the hell did that happen?” Severus questioned out loud upon spotting the bleeding bite around his right nipple.

“I did it,” Harry said from the doorway.

Severus chuckled. “I didn’t even notice.”

“Really? How?”

Severus dissolved into full blown belly laughs, clutching the sink to keep himself upright. “Harry, do you not remember the morning in the shower, where you bit my shoulder and I told you I liked it rough?”

Harry turned bright red. “I do now.”

Severus reached out a long arm and caught hold of the sprite, wrapping him in a hug and drawing him into a kiss.

“Feel better now, now you’ve remembered that I like it rough?”

“A bit,” Harry admitted.

“Do you want to tell me what your bad dream was about or should I just guess based on our nocturnal activities?”

“It was a memory…of him.”

“I guessed as much,” Severus said softly, leaning down for another kiss. “Now, I have an idea. Would you like to hear it?”

Harry nodded, sliding his hands down Severus’ bare back to squeeze his firm buttocks, making the older man smile and lean in to kiss his neck.

“We are up very early. So, how do you feel about a nice hot bath together and then breakfast? I’ll even let you pick a bubble bath.”

Harry smiled and ducked down to kiss the bite around his husband’s nipple. “I like that idea.”

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“It’s been a week.”

Remus nodded at his pacing spouse. The willowy Pureblood had been ranting and pacing for over four hours now, about many various things, but it all came back to one sore point: the lack of response to his letter. Sirius didn’t really expect him to answer, Remus knew that much from all the years they had been together. Sirius just wanted to rant and have someone agree with him wholeheartedly for a while.

“A whole week. What am I meant to do…just sit around twiddling my thumbs?” Sirius questioned, flopping down on the bed. He looked at Remus. “I am actually looking for an answer at this point.”

Remus sniggered and crawled over to kiss him. “Sirius, sweetheart, it has been a long time since you last had contact. How long did it take you to actually write the letter?”

“A while.”

“A while…as in?”

“Fine, it took me weeks to write.”

“Despite what you may think, I have my suspicions that Canis can be just as stubborn as you, which makes for a very difficult pairing if you ask me. Give him some time. He’s probably just as scared as you are.”

“Scared? What reason do I have to be scared? I’m not scared,” Sirius argued defensively.

Remus raised an eyebrow and smirked. “Oh? I thought you were just a little bit scared of contacting him. Silly me. I must have read it wrong.” He climbed back to the head of the bed and picked up his book. “Seeing as I have it so wrong, perhaps you should talk to someone else. Maybe Sol could help you out on this one.”

Sirius watched him open the book and begin reading. He wasn’t going to admit it, he just wasn’t. Oh…but Remus looked so innocent, sitting there, his head in a book. Nope. No. No way. He was not going to say it. Damn it…why did Remus have to nibble his lip while he read? He knew it drove Sirius crazy. But when Remus got into his books, there was nothing else in his head, it had always been the same.

Sirius gave in with a sigh and crawled up the bed, pulling the book away and sliding into Remus’ lap, straddling him. “Fine, you’re right. You’re always right. How do you do that?”

“You wouldn’t like me so much if I wasn’t always right,” Remus said, stroking his fingertips along Sirius’ spine.

“True. I just wish it wasn’t so damn annoying.” He sighed and laid his forehead against his lovers. “What if he doesn’t want to get in touch?” he whispered.

“Then he’s a fool. Like I said last time we dealt with your father…well, any member of your family really. They are all fools if they can’t see how wonderful you are.”

“You know, you might be a little biased when it comes to an opinion about me. Just a thought.”

“I might be biased, but I love you. Doesn’t that even it out?”

“Definitely.” Sirius sighed again. “I’m being really neurotic, aren’t I?”

“No,” Remus said, pulling him in for a kiss. “You’re being the same man I fell in love with all those many years ago, the same man who gave up everything he had for me. So you’re a little anxious, so what? You’re allowed to be. It shows you have a heart, it shows that you’re only human. And I love you, just the way you are.”

Sirius smiled. “I love you too.”

Sirius leaned in and captured his husbands lips in a scorching kiss, taking his good sweet time, tangling his fingers in greying wavy brown hair. Remus moaned and gave into the dominance of his lover, wrapping his arms around his slim waist.

It wasn’t often that Remus let Sirius take control this close to the full moon. The impending orb was only two days away, and he usually became very demanding around this time of the month. But he couldn’t deny how much he enjoyed the dominance, the fierce need in Sirius’ every move.

“This is different,” Remus breathed as they came up for air. Well, Remus came up for air. Sirius, on the other hand, moved his lips to Remus’ throat. Remus gasped and tilted his head, letting Sirius at his throat. Nimble fingers swiftly unbuttoned his shirt, lips following down to seal around a nipple and suck. He arched his back, begging for more without actually being able to say a single thing.

Sirius stripped them both and Remus laid back, spreading his legs so Sirius could settle between them but his lover shook his head.

“That’s not what I want,” Sirius whispered.

Remus froze. “I don’t understand. It felt like that was what you wanted. Don’t you want to make love with me?” he asked, not even trying to mask his sudden insecurities.

Sirius smiled, leaning in to kiss him breathless. “Silly boy,” he chuckled. “It’s too close to the moon for me to top. Did you forget?”

“No, but it felt like you wanted to top.”

Sirius smiled. “I don’t want to top you. I want to be consumed by you, to feel you take control of me. Wasn’t I clear in trying to tell you that?”

Remus felt himself blush. 

“Sorry, honey. I should have been clearer.”

Remus smiled and the two of them knew that nothing needed to be said, there just wasn’t any use for words when actions conveyed exactly what they needed and wanted. Remus was just amazed that after all the time they’d been together, Sirius could still surprise him.

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Severus awoke to feel warm arms wrapped around him, slim fingers clinging to his pyjama top, toying with his hair.

“And just how long have you been awake?” Severus questioned gently.

“A little bit,” Harry said, snuggling further into him. 

“Nightmare?”

“No. I just woke up early and I didn’t feel like getting up. It was too comfortable. And, besides, this house is cold. I stuck my foot out of the duvet and pulled it straight back in.”

Severus chuckled and let his fingertips skim over the soft skin of his husband, tilted his chin back to press a sweet kiss to his lips.

“Severus?”

“Yes, love?”

“Can I ask you something without making you vomit?”

Severus sniggered. “Depends on the question. Considering I haven’t eaten anything yet, it should be safe.”

He felt Harry squirm in his arms and opened his eyes to marvel at the bright blush staining his cheeks.

“I was just wondering…well…” A frustrated sigh. “I was wondering how Sirius and Remus do it.”

“Do…what?”

Harry looked up at him. “You know…How do they…how does their…when they claim each other.”

“Oh!”

“I know, it’s not something I should really be thinking of in terms of my parents, but I wasn’t actually thinking of them to begin with,” Harry said.

“Who were you thinking of?”

“Me and you. I was wondering how we would do it if I wasn’t half girl, if I didn’t have any girly bits. And then my mind began to wander. Well, Remus and Sirius don’t have any girl bits and they obviously do it. Remus was pregnant not too long ago, and we had to leave the house so they could make things up.”

Harry was babbling and Severus found it sort of sweet. Severus smiled and rolled him to his back, leaning over him to kiss him and shut him up. “I understand you, love. I see what you’re getting at. You want to know how we would do it if you weren’t a hermaphrodite.”

“Yes.” Harry paused. “Severus, how did you do it with…the ones before me?”

Severus fell silent, caught off guard by the question. 

“Sorry, I shouldn’t have asked,” Harry said, embarrassed.

“No, no, it’s perfectly all right for you to ask, I have no secrets from you about my past. You just caught me by surprise is all.” He paused for a moment. “Right. Do you know what anal sex is?”

“Not exactly. I know that’s what Seamus and Dean do, but I’m not too sure on what it actually is.”

“Well, anal sex is what most couples where both partners are male do in bed together. Anal sex is…instead of entering you where I usually do, I would enter your back passage. Does that make sense?”

Harry screwed up his face. “But that hurts. Why would you want to do that?”

Severus chuckled. “It’s like everything else related to sex. It’s not supposed to hurt, it’s supposed to feel good.” Severus thought back to the last time he had let anyone top him. “It can be a little uncomfortable to begin with, I suppose. We can try it, if you want.”

“I don’t know,” Harry answered after a few moments. “Maybe…sometime.”

“We don’t have to, but a demonstration would be the easiest way to show you.”

Harry smiled and leaned up to kiss him. “You think of everything,” he murmured, making Severus smile and kiss him back. “So, have you finished your shopping?”

Severus stared down at him in confusion. “Shopping for what?”

“Christmas.”

Severus chuckled, running his fingers through the messy raven tresses. Harry needed another trim and Severus made a mental note to ask Molly about it. “Christmas is over a month away.”

Harry giggled. “No, it’s in ten days.”

“What?”

“Today is the fifteenth of December. Christmas is ten days away.”

Severus froze in shock. “Oh, sweet Merlin. I haven’t done any shopping yet. And I’m late with three of my orders.”

“Relax,” Harry said, stroking his lovers hair out of his eyes. “What potions are you late with?”

“Dreamless sleep, boil reducing solution, and a feverfew salve for burns.”

“Okay. Hermione knows how to make all of those. She can work on the potions while you shop. On that note, I do actually need to go too.”

Severus opened his mouth to reply that maybe that wasn’t such a good idea when there was a knock at the door. “Come in,” Severus called after taking down the silencing charm.

“Not looking, not looking,” Ron said as he entered, holding one hand over his eyes while holding Catherine in his free arm.

“It’s okay, Ron, we’re decent,” Harry said and the redhead peeked through his fingers.

“Sorry,” he said, perching on the edge of the bed. “I went to wake Sam the other morning and he and Tonks were…you know.”

Severus and Harry chuckled. 

“So, Sirius says he and Remus are going shopping and wanted to know if anyone wanted to go with them. Me and Sol already said yes, and it looks like Tonks will come too.”

Harry waited for Severus to make his own assessment of the proposed situation, tickling Catherine’s toes and listening to her squeal in amusement while keeping a covert eye on his husband.

“I suppose that would be agreeable,” Severus said eventually.

“So glad you approve.”

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“Papa?”

Remus shoved the half wrapped makeup set under his pillow and turned to face his daughter. “Snooping for you gifts?” he asked.

“No. Why? Is that one mine?” she asked excitedly.

“It might be,” he replied with a smile. “So, if you’re not trying to find what we got you, what are you after?”

She chewed on her bottom lip and picked at her nails. “I kind of wanted to talk but I can’t talk to dad because he’d get the wrong idea.”

“All right. Come on, sit down and tell me what’s on your mind.”

She climbed onto the bed and sat cross-legged, trying to peek under the pillow. Remus smiled and put Sirius’ pillow on top of his own to stop her. She smiled sheepishly.

“Ten days, that’s all, and then you can have it,” he said. “So, what’s on your mind?”

“I was wondering about sex,” she said bluntly and Remus choked on the sip of tea he had just taken.

“Sex?”

“Not the mechanics of it, I know that one. I don’t need you to tell me where babies come from or anything like that, I know that already.”

“So, what is it you want to know?”

“How do you know when you’re meant to do it? I mean, how did you know it was right with dad? And how did you know you were ready? Did you wait until you go married, or did you do it before that?”

Remus sniggered. “So, you’re wondering about the timing and connection to the person you chose.” She nodded. “You could have gone to Sirius with this.”

“No, I really couldn’t,” she said firmly. “If I went to him with this, he’d automatically think me and Charlie were doing it.”

Remus felt himself pale. He felt for sure he wasn’t ready to have this conversation with his daughter, but he knew Sirius would never be ready.

“Are you and Charlie…”

“No!” she interrupted. “We’re not, I promise.”

“All right,” he said, breathing a sigh of relief. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I don’t usually do the protective dad bit, but I just had to check. Right, back to the conversation. How did I know Sirius was the right one? Well, that’s easy. When I was with Sirius, I was just me. I wasn’t a werewolf, I wasn’t worrying about school or home or the bullies or anything. When I was with Sirius, I was just me, and that felt wonderful.”

“That’s how I feel when I’m with Charlie.”

“Then, I think, Charlie may be the right one for you. But there are other things that you need to remember when deciding to be that intimate with someone.”

“Like what?”

“Trust. You need to be able to trust the person. If you don’t trust them, how could you ever show them that side of you? There is a difference between having sex and making love.”

“What difference?” she asked.

“Well, when you have sex, it’s just about the physical. As Sirius once put it, having sex is about getting your rocks off. But making love? Now, that is something completely different. Making love is about showing the person you love and trust how you feel, about wanting to show the person you care about more than anything the side of yourself you never show anyone. You can’t make love unless you love and trust the person you’re with.”

Remus waited patiently for her to come to her own conclusions, to make up her own mind about what she wanted to ask next. 

“If it’s all about love and trust, how come Sol and Bill are always so bruised?”

Remus burst out laughing. 

“Well, you have to consider the kinds of people they are. Solarin is a very powerful being and Bill is a curse breaker. To do what they do, to be who they are, requires a certain degree of control in their everyday lives. Could you imagine if Sol let go all the time?”

“There would be a whole lot more broken things around here, and a lot more bruises,” Phoenix said.

“Exactly. When they’re intimate, they trust each other enough to show that side of themselves, to let go and lose control. It’s hard to find someone that you can show that side of yourself to.”

“Is that what it’s like with you and Dad?”

Remus smiled fondly. “Yes, it’s just like that with me and Sirius. He trusts me enough to show me his vulnerable side, to let me see when he’s hurting and scared…and me…well, I trust Sirius enough to show him my fears, something I was so scared to do for so very long.”

“You’re scared of things?”

He chuckled. “Yes, I am. Everyone is scared of things. It just takes a special someone for you to be able to admit those fears aloud. Sirius is that someone for me.”

Phoenix sat there in silence for a while and Remus let her. He had to admit, when he had had the same talk with his own father, it had taken him a while to get it all straight in his head, even though he had Sirius in his life.

“Okay, I’m clear on the connection bit. But how do you know when you’re ready to do it? Should you wait until you get married, or is it okay to do it before then?” she questioned.

“It’s a personal choice. Some wait until they marry, like Ron and Hermione. Others find a different moment to be theirs. Marriage isn’t for everyone. Like Sol and Bill. They waited a very long time to marry, but they didn’t wait that long to be intimate.”

“Did you and dad wait until you got married?”

“No. Me and Sirius first made love when we were sixteen in our dorm room whilst our friends were in Hogsmeade. That was our right moment. Everyone finds theirs in their own time. You and Charlie will know when it’s your moment.”

“But how?”

He considered her question, thinking back to being young and virginal. How had he known it was the right moment with Sirius? How had he known he was ready? 

“Do you remember when you found Harry and you knew you had to help him, even if it cost you everything you had?”

“Yes.”

“How did you know you had to help him? How did you know he was worth the sacrifice you had to make?”

“I don’t know,” she said, shrugging. “I just did, I suppose.”

He smiled. “It’s not so dissimilar. When the moment is right for you, you’ll just know. You’ll get this feeling, and there won’t be any worry in your head about doing it.”

There was another long moment of silent contemplation.

“I have more questions.”

“That is what a parent is for,” Remus said, smiling. “You can ask me anything.”

“I heard…that the first time…well…I heard it hurts,” she said, blushing.

Remus opened his mouth to disagree with her, but stopped himself. He couldn’t disagree. He didn’t know. He only knew what it was like for him, he didn’t know what it felt like for a woman.

“I think, perhaps, this is the part where you need a woman,” he said. “I can’t tell you if it hurts from a woman’s point of view.”

“Oh. Maybe I’ll just ask one of the girls in the house then.”

“Probably a wise idea. Now, is there anything else you wanted to know?”

“No, but I was wondering about Christmas.”

Remus laughed and stroked her hair. “No, you cannot have what is under the pillows until Christmas day,” Remus said. 

The makeup kit had been Solarin’s idea. Sirius had definitely not wanted to get his daughter makeup, until Solarin had threatened to kill him if he didn’t. The werewolf and his lover were fast learning how territorial over her things the augur was. She was certainly sick of Phoenix stealing her makeup.

“I wasn’t going to ask that, but, now that you mention it, can I at least have a clue?” she asked.

“Hmmm…you’ll like it and Sirius pitched a fit when I picked it up in the shop.”

“That doesn’t help me!”

“You didn’t say the clue had to help you figure it out.”

“You’re sneaky.”

“I’m a father, of course I am. So, what was it you actually wanted to know?”

She crawled over the bed and settled herself in his lap, snuggling into the hug he gave her. “Christmas was never really fun when I was Draco. It was always some big production. We had a huge party every year, all his friends. And, sure, it was kinda fun. But it wasn’t all that. I just wondered what Christmas was going to be like this year.”

“Chaotic, I should imagine. There will be lots of people, I can promise you that. But I doubt it will be very ordered. Lots of food, alcohol, if Sirius gets his way, and presents, if the shopping everyone is doing is anything to go by.” He kissed the top of her head. “Does that sound better than what you’re used to?”

“Loads.”

“Good.”

Remus smiled and gently pulled her hand away from the pillow she had not-so-subtly been sneaking towards. 

She grinned sheepishly and snuggled further into him. At that moment, Remus knew that, no matter what anyone got him for Christmas this year, nothing could be better than his children.

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Harry arched his neck to let Severus get better access to his throat and moaned. He knew from the gentle caress of his husbands lips that it was Severus, not someone controlling him. But that didn’t answer the question of why Severus was kissing his neck in the middle of the night.

“Something wrong?” Harry whispered.

“No, nothing wrong, love. There is something I want to show you, but you need to get dressed and wrap up warm for me to do that,” Severus murmured in his ear.

Harry blinked sleepily at the clock. “It’s three in the morning. Are you sure you have to show me right now?”

Severus seemed to contemplate that for a moment. “Yes, it has to be now. You’ll like it, I promise. Think of it as an early Christmas present.”

Harry grinned and kissed him as he eased himself out of the warm bedding. Severus wouldn’t have woken him without a good reason, not in the middle of the night. And Severus obviously wanted it to be a surprise, so Harry dressed in silence and kept his questions to himself. Once he was dressed, Severus bundled him up in a thick coat, a hat, gloves and a scarf and then pulled Harry into his arms. 

“To get there, we need to Apparate. I know you don’t like doing it, but it is only this once. I didn’t have time to lay on a Portkey,” the elder man said quietly. “Is that all right, love?”

“Just this once?”

“Just this one time, I promise.”

“Okay,” Harry said, burying his face in Severus’ chest. He held on tight and shut his eyes against the pressure of being transported by his husband. And then he raised his head and looked around.

“Where are we?” Harry asked.

“Spinners Meadow,” Severus said. “Me and Sol used to come here when we were younger. It’s nice in the summer, but it’s about now that it really shines.”

“Why?” Harry questioned. It was a nice spot. A wide open area of grass surrounded by a wilderness of trees, shielding them from the outside world. But there wasn’t really anything special about it.

“Just wait, you’ll see. Give it a few minutes and it will all become clear,” he said with a small smile. 

Harry slipped from Severus’ hold and walked a little way from him. “Aren’t you worried about Lucius and his flunkies turning up?”

Severus laughed. “At three in the morning in the freezing cold? Not likely. Lucius might be insane but he does like his creature comforts. Cold was never his thing. Ah, here it comes.”

Harry didn’t get a chance to ask what Severus was taking about as the heavens opened and a flood of snowflakes tumbled to the ground. Within minutes the entire space was covered in white and it seemed to glow in the dim light of the faint moon shining through the clouds. The trees were sprinkled with glittering flakes of snow, ice freezing over the surface and making them shine even more.

Severus stood and watched Harry turn in slow circles, a look of utter wonder etched on his delicate features. Snow clung to his thick eyelashes and settled in his hair, catching in his scarf. Severus couldn’t tear his eyes away. Harry was absolutely breathtaking in this sudden winter wonderland. 

“Like it?” the older man murmured.

“I love it,” Harry replied, just as quietly. “It’s beautiful. But how did you know it was about to snow?”

Severus smiled and pulled out a blanket and spread it on the ground, casting a charm to keep it dry and warm. “It’s a slight change in the air, very small. A drop of just a few degrees, and there’s this smell, kind of cool and clean,” he said as he sat down.

“I didn’t know you could smell snow,” the petite being said as he settled in the comfort of Severus’ embrace. “Can anyone do it, or just you?”

“I don’t know, I’ve never asked. By sunrise, the garden at home will be covered in snow. We could take Miri out in it, build a snowman for her. And I’m sure Dorian will like it, and Nixie. What do you think, love?” he whispered in his ear, nipping the lobe, his lips slipping down to kiss his neck.

“Sounds good,” Harry murmured, snuggling into his lovers embrace. “I’ve always wanted to build a snowman.”

“Have you never built one?” Severus asked, slightly shocked.

“No. I never saw snow until I got to Hogwarts, and then I felt too old to build one. I was meant to be this saviour, so I felt too grown up to build a snowman.”

“Ah. Well, in that case, I feel you must build one. It is an experience that is needed in every young mans life.”

Harry giggled and turned his head for a kiss. “Severus, can I ask you something?”

“Anything. Has something been playing on your mind?”

“Well, I was wondering how you became a spy for the Order. I mean, I know you became a Death Eater to keep Sol safe, and I understand that completely. But I don’t really understand how you became a spy too.”

Severus considered the best way to explain it. “Well, as you can imagine, I didn’t tell Albus about joining the Death Eaters. I didn’t want to risk it, that he might talk me out of it. That night, when I got home with Solarin, the Dark Mark fresh on both of us, Albus turned up unexpectedly.”

Severus wearily made his way to the door, leaving Solarin curled up on the sofa cradling her sore arm. Potions had done nothing to ease her pain and now she just sat there, staring out at the room in silence. He suspected she was just ignoring him on purpose now.

“Albus! What…I mean, why…it’s unexpected to see you so late,” Severus spluttered.

“I felt the need for a visit. You left dinner so suddenly. I worried that perhaps something had happened with young Solarin,” Albus said. “May I come in?”

Severus grimaced. “Now really is not the best time.”

“I really must insist.”

Severus knew that he would never beat Albus in a battle. There was no point in trying to keep him out if he really wanted to come in. So he sighed, hanging his head as he stepped back. He held his breath as Albus caught sight of Solarin’s arm, of the bandage on his own.

“Sweet Merlin,” Albus gasped. “Severus…what have you done?”

“It didn’t take a miracle for Albus to work out what I’d done…and why,” Severus said sadly.

“So…what happened? He must have been angry,” Harry questioned.

“I think saddened is closer to the truth. But, yes, he wasn’t very impressed.” He smiled sadly. “Of course, Albus managed to turn it around. I always have been grateful to him for that. Don’t misunderstand me, love, spying wasn’t always easy. But it was better than any other option I had.”

“I get that. You did what you had to do.”

“Yes, I did. And I still do. You do what you have to, to protect the ones you love.”

Harry sat in silence for a long while, thinking about his life with Severus, about what they had both gone through to get to this point.

“Severus?”

“Mmm?”

“I love you. I really, really love you.”

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Christmas had been a quiet affair, mostly.

The food had been delicious, the presents abundant and the booze flowing freely. Everyone had enjoyed themselves immensely and found themselves thankful that nothing eventful had happened. No gifts from Lucius, no letters, no people they knew turning up dead. 

It had made a nice change, if nothing else.

But the calm didn’t last for very long.

Severus looked up from his close concentration of the nappy he was trying to put Miri into to find Bill hovering in the doorway.

“I swear, this child will grow up and become a nudist. She just wants to be naked,” Severus joked, but Bill didn’t laugh. “Something on your mind?”

“Hmmm?”

“I asked if there was something on your mind,” he prompted as he finally managed to fasten the nappy and coax Miri back into her little jeans.

“It’s Sol. Has she…said anything to you?”

“About what?”

“No, I mean in general. When was the last time you heard her say something?” Bill pressed and Severus was surprised to find that he actually had to think about it.

“I’m not sure, to be honest. Why?”

“She’s gone quiet on everyone, even Dorian. I just wondered if you knew what was wrong,” Bill said, trying to sound casual and failing miserably.

Severus put Miri into her little playpen they had recently erected in the playroom. The tiny augur’s parents had noticed she was trying to crawl, and found it highly reassuring that there was a way to keep her contained…for the time being.

“Has she never gone silent on you?” the dark haired wizard asked.

“No. Well…only when she was in the Muggle world. Not while we’ve been together.”

Severus smiled at him. “She’s probably just sulking about something. She does that you know. Give her a few days and she’ll come around.”

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George was finding it impossible to concentrate.

It had been that way for days, weeks, maybe even months. He wasn’t entirely sure, he’d lost track. But there it was, the huge lime green hippogriff of an issue that refused to be ignored, that demanded his attention with the same force as a Bludger round the head. He had considered his options of who to talk to.

His mother? No, definitely not. Not the most open minded of witches his mother. He loved her, but this was absolutely something he positively couldn’t talk to his mother about.

His father? No, simply for the reason that he wasn’t ready to go there.

Bill? Charlie? Maybe, they had promise as a possible route of dealing with it.

Percy? George nearly laughed out loud when he considered talking to Percy about anything, let alone this. 

Fred? Well, he’d already tried that choice and his throat had closed up faster than a Snitch.

Ron? Ginny? No, they were too young. He was the older sibling, they were supposed to come to him with problems, not the other way around.

He circled the options of who in their weird extended family he could talk to and finally came to only one decision.

“Hello, George,” Sirius called out merrily as the redhead entered his kitchen. He was standing at the sink, washing dishes by hand while Remus took a nap. It was the day after the first monthly change and Remus was absolutely shattered. Sam didn’t look much better. “It is George, right? You’re not Fred are you?”

“No, I’m George. You’re getting good at telling us apart,” he said with a smile, taking a seat at the table. “Remus sleeping?”

“Yeah. He’s worn out, poor thing.” He paused, taking in the worried look of the Weasley male. “You all right?”

“Not really,” he said with a small smile. “I was wondering if I could talk to you about something.”

“Sure. Is this the kind of conversation that would benefit from alcohol?”

George sniggered. “Probably.” 

Sirius dried off his hands, grabbed a bottle of Muggle vodka and two glasses and took a seat at the table. He poured them each generous measures and passed George his glass before waiting for the younger man to talk.

George took a fortifying gulp of alcohol before finding his voice.

“I’m confused about something and I need to talk to someone about it but I don’t know who to talk to. I’ve thought about all of my family and I just can’t bring myself to say it to any of them. You’re kind of family, and you’d probably understand my problem, so I decided to talk to you.”

“Okay. You know, whatever it is, I’m sure it’s not the end of the world. Why don’t you tell me what’s on your mind.”

“I…ummm…well…I…shit, I just can’t get it out,” George struggled.

“Well…is it anything to do with work?” George shook his head. “One of your brothers? Or Ginny? Or your parents?” Another shake. “Ummmm…you feel like giving me a hint?”

“I would if I could get the words out.”

Sirius smiled. Sometimes, the Weasley children reminded him so much of himself when he was younger. He thought back to when he was in his late teens/early twenties. His main problems had been his family, Remus and his N.E.W.T.’s. Well, George was no longer in Hogwarts and he had said it was nothing to do with work or his family. Which only left one thing. 

“George…are you seeing someone?”

“No, but you’re in the right area. I just…I…”

A low frustrated growl from the redhead had Sirius’ sympathy rising. “Okay…so you’re not seeing someone, but it’s in that area. You need to talk to someone and you felt that I would be the only one who would understand…right. Give me a minute to think on this.”

There was something nagging at Sirius’ brain, a strange familiarity to the conversation. It was as if he’d had it before. He wracked his brain, trying to remember when he’d had it before…and who with. And then it hit him.

“You’re gay,” he breathed. “That’s what it is. You’re unsure about your sexuality and you wanted some advice about how to figure it out. Is that it?”

“Yeah, that’s it. Just out of curiosity…what finally tipped you off?” George asked with a sigh of relief.

Sirius smiled as he refilled their glasses. “I had the exact same conversation with Remus when we were young. Well, maybe not exactly the same, but along the same lines. He was confused and we helped him figure it out.”

“We?”

Sirius knew George was stalling, finding the conversation difficult to deal with and he let him be. “Me, James, Lily, Peter, Fabian and Gideon.”

“Mum’s brothers, the ones who died in the first war?”

“The very same. They were great guys, those two. You and Fred are so much like them, you know. But…back to the conversation.”

“Oh. Right.”

“So…how long have you been…wondering about this?”

“I’m not sure…a few weeks? It might even be longer than that. So…I was really wondering on…how I go about…well…”

“How do you figure it out?”

George breathed a sigh of relief. “Yes, exactly. So? How did you? And how did Remus?”

Sirius chuckled. “Me? I had a girl shove me into a broom closet and strip us both when I was thirteen. It would have been wonderful, and very kinky, but I…ummm…well, I couldn’t get it up,” he said, sniggering slightly. “Her equipment just didn’t do it for me. As for Remus?” The elder wizard let out a chuckle. “He kissed Lily and then me, to see if it was men or women that did it for him.”

“Wait…he kissed Harry’s mum?”

“Yup. One quick kiss, nothing more. It didn’t mean anything, it was just a kiss. We called it a scientific experiment. Well, kissing Lily did nothing for him but kissing me…well, he seemed to enjoy that.”

“So…I should kiss someone?”

Sirius shrugged. “Have you kissed a woman before?” A small nod. “Have you tried kissing a man?” A shake of the head. “Well, you could try it.”

George nodded and let out a sigh of relief. He felt so much better.

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“Severus…”

The Potions Master looked up from the notes he was making to find Harry standing in the doorway of their bedroom, holding a large package wrapped in brown paper and tied with string.

“Another evil Owl Post?” he questioned as Harry walked towards him.

“No. A gift…sort of. I promise you’ll like it,” Harry said as he laid the bundle on the bed.

Severus smiled into the kiss Harry gave him and then reached for the package. He opened it and smiled at the items he found. Four rare potions texts, a bottle of unicorn tears worth 50 galleons, a box of French pastries, a pair of expensive silk boxers, a monogrammed pair of green Egyptian cotton pyjamas, and a set of midnight blue silk sheets.

“Harry, not that I’m not grateful for these, they’re wonderful gifts, but what is this all in aid of? Are they Christmas gifts you forgot about or arrived late?”

“No,” he said, sliding into Severus’ lap and kissing him. “It’s exactly a year today since you rescued me. I just wanted to show you that I remembered and I’m very grateful for it.”

Severus had himself forgotten what the day was. New Years Eve. A whole year. It seemed impossible to Severus that a whole year had passed since he had rescued Harry. The sprite was so much stronger now, and so much had happened in the twelve months.

“I love my gifts,” Severus said, leaning in to kiss his husband breathless.

Severus found he loved his gifts even more when he and Harry were done christening the new sheets.

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Sirius ran his fingers through Remus’ hair, slowly kissing him to wake him as the early morning sun filtered through the curtains. Remus moaned and pressed his body against his lovers, wrapping his arms around Sirius’ neck.

“Remus,” the Animagus breathed as his husband licked his windpipe. He felt the hard press of his husbands arousal against him. “Well, someone’s happy to see me.”

“I’m sorry, Siri. But I need you.”

Now, why did that sound so familiar? Sirius forced his brain to work through the incredible pleasure that Remus was eliciting from his body as he suckled at his windpipe. 

“Oh, Merlin,” Sirius groaned. “Already?”

“Mmmmmm,” Remus moaned as he ripped open Sirius’ pyjama shirt and found a nipple to suck.

“Mating cycle,” Sirius gasped. “Oh, well. At least I’m horny.”

Remus sniggered and shoved his hand down Sirius’ pyjama pants, making his mate throw his head back and moan.

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Sam looked up from his study of a pile of patient notes to find a tired and dishevelled Sirius slithering into the library. The Animagus made his way over and grabbed Sam by the upper arm, pulling him to the door.

“Me and Remus have a delicate little problem, and, you being a Healer and all, we could really use your help right about now,” Sirius murmured in his ear as he led him up the stairs towards his bedroom.

“What kind of problem?” Sam questioned with a curious look at his Alpha’s mate.

Sirius blushed faintly and Sam couldn’t help but smile. Ah, a sex problem. They stopped in front of the bedroom door and Sirius looked around to ensure they weren’t being listened in on.

“Remus has been topping me for hours but he’s still hard as a rock,” Sirius hissed. “Quite honestly, if he tops me one more time I may die.”

“Wait, are you saying he’s had a continuous erection?”

“Yes.”

“For how long?”

Sirius reached out and looked at Sam’s wristwatch. “About five hours.”

“And nothing either of you do is making it go away?”

“Nothing. I mean, Sam, I’m no stranger to one of Remus’ mating cycles, I’m used to it. I even enjoy being ravaged for a few hours…usually. But this is ridiculous. He’s on the brink of tears, he’s in pain, and, quite frankly, I’m right there with him.”

Sam leaned against the banister and stared at the carpet, deep in thought, for a few minutes. “Nothing like this has happened before?” he questioned and Sirius shook his head. Another few minutes of quiet contemplation. “I need to talk to Remus.”

The two made their way into the room, where Sam was slightly shocked by the state his Alpha was in. Remus was sitting naked in bed, his lower regions covered with the blanket and a pillow, his head in his hands, tears pouring from his eyes. Even through the thick blanket and the pillow, Sam could still see how clearly aroused Remus was.

“Siri,” Remus sobbed. “Make it stop, please. I don’t care what it takes, I’ll do it. Please, make it stop.”

Sirius climbed onto the bed and held his husband close. Sam took a seat, perched on the edge of the bed beside the distraught younger man and passed Remus a tissue.

“All right, Remus, we’ll fix this, I promise,” Sam said softly. “Can you pull down the blanket for me, so I can have a look? I won’t touch you, I swear. Just a little look.”

Remus sniffed and nodded, laying back as Sirius exposed his lower half for him. He heard the hiss from Sam and wasn’t surprised. It felt that painful too.

The werewolf mating cycle only occurred when a werewolf had found a lasting mate. It had nothing to do with procreation, it was purely about sex and the connection with said mate and nothing anyone did could stop it once it started. Hormones flooded the werewolf’s body until he or she had no choice but to give in and hope their mate knew to hold on tight during the ride.

Remus and Sirius had been dealing with Remus’ mating cycle since they were sixteen. They were no strangers to the demands the natural process put on them. In fact, they had come to view it as a normal part of their relationship, healthy even. That is, until it went bezerk on them.

Sam couldn’t help the hiss, he just couldn’t. He’d just been through his first mating cycle with Tonks, so he could sympathise with how vehement the body could be during these times. He remembered all too well how his body had taken over, hormones flooding his system and rendering him incapable of anything other than satisfying carnal urges. Tonks had been good about it, putting up with the several hours of reoccurring erections and insatiable sexual appetite. She’d even used the time to attempt a few of the more daring positions she had been wanting to try.

But Sam’s erections had faded every single time after he had climaxed. His body had needed to rest between periods of incredible burning heat and need.

Remus’ penis was rock solid and angrily red, the tip an eye watering purple. He peered closer. The skin was beginning to rub off in places, speckles of blood almost indistinguishable from the crimson flesh. The constant pulsing of the engorged member seemed to be normal at least. At least Sam could rule out a blood clot that had gone south. There was still a full blood supply, so there was nothing wrong with the circulation.

He nodded at Sirius that he could cover his husband again and began to pace, his mind circling through possibilities.

“Five hours?” he questioned and Sirius nodded.

“Just over, actually.”

“Are you in bad pain, Sirius, or is it bearable?”

“I can handle it. I’m not bleeding, just sore.”

Sam nodded and continued to pace, summoning his bag and distractedly putting a thermometer under Remus’ tongue.

“Remus, has it just been you topping Sirius or has he topped you?” the healer asked as he peered at the thin glass tube.

“Just me,” Remus said. “Sirius hasn’t topped in months.”

“Not since I knocked him up,” Sirius joked.

“Has Sirius ever topped during a mating cycle before?”

“Never,” Remus said. “We never even thought of it, because I’m the Alpha.”

Sam chuckled. “But that’s not the way you usually mate outside of a mating cycle. You told me yourself you take it in turns, however the mood strikes you. My suggestion is to have Sirius top. If it doesn’t go away after that, if normal bodily functions don’t return after that climax, come and find me again and we’ll figure something else out.” He picked up his bag and moved to the door. 

“Have fun,” the healer called as he left the room.

Remus stared at the door and almost burst into tears once again. More sex? More sex? Was Sam mad? Remus couldn’t do it, he just couldn’t. He wasn’t sure he even had the energy to kiss Sirius, let alone let Sirius top him. And, how could he ask Sirius to go again? He’d already put his mate through enough in the last few hours, he couldn’t ask him to put up with more. But…he was in pain, and it wasn’t like it was a completely foreign concept to have Sirius take him. And if it was a way to maybe make the pain stop…Perhaps Sirius wouldn’t mind too much…

“He’s kidding…right?” Sirius asked uncertainly. “I mean, I don’t know about you, but I don’t think I even have the energy to go again.”

“I know you’re tired, I’m so sorry. But…we could try it,” Remus said gently as his member gave another painful twinge. “Please? I know it’s unfair of me to ask you to do this…especially seeing as we’ve mated so many times already. But…I’m in pain and…no, forget it. I’m sorry, sweetheart, forget I said anything.”

Sirius looked at his husband with a dazed kind of smile. “Remus…do you have the energy to go again?” 

Remus nodded, biting his lower lip.

“Do you want me to top you?”

“Please?” 

“Now, the please isn’t necessary, honey,” he said as he leaned in, capturing his lips in a sweet kiss. He pulled back and shook his head as Remus tried to take control of the kiss. “No, now it’s my turn. Just relax, I know what I’m doing. Just relax, Remus.”

So Remus did as he was told, closing his eyes and sighing as Sirius peppered his body with kisses, nibbling his nipples, making Remus whine, then moving on to gently kissing his hips and thighs, never touching his painful penis. He moaned as Sirius licked his inner thigh, reaching up to stroke Remus’ chest with one hand while he grabbed the tube of lubricant from the bedside table. It had been a brand new tube when this all began. Five hours later and countless rounds and it was almost empty. The more Remus had taken Sirius, the more lube he’d used in an attempt to ease the discomfort his continual thrusting had caused.

Sirius slid up Remus’ body and settled in between his thighs, slightly leant off to the side so he didn’t rest his weight on painful areas, pulling Remus’ thigh up to rest on his hip. The position left Remus open and ready for him. Sirius coated his fingers with lube and kissed Remus hard as he slowly slipped his hand down, gently working a finger into him. When Remus began to behave favourably to the intrusion, Sirius added another, gradually loosening the tight guardian ring of muscle. More fingers, more kisses, more heat, more need. Soon enough, Remus was begging for more, tangling his fingers in raven locks, kissing back desperately and thrusting down onto the fingers. He whimpered, almost panicky, as Sirius removed them from the tight passage.

“Shhh, honey, hush, it’s okay, all okay here,” Sirius soothed. “Get onto your knees for me.”

Remus rolled up to his knees and gasped when he felt the warm arms of his lover wrap around him from behind, his back pressed against his chest, Sirius’ knees gently pushing his further apart so he could settle comfortably.

“Still want this, my sweet wolf?” Sirius whispered in his ear, nipping at the lobe.

“Yes,” Remus breathed, rewarded by the sound of Sirius coating his tumescent shaft in lubricant. The empty tube was thrown across the room and Remus shivered; Sirius kissed his neck as he coated himself more fully, positioning himself at the stretched opening. 

“Siri…please…need it…please…take…have…I want…Sirius…love you…” Remus gasped, trying to make his mind work as his husband slid his way inside, filling Remus in a way that felt so right. Remus moaned as his body settled around the hard length inside him, muscles relaxing and allowing Sirius to get deeper until his balls rested against the soft skin of Remus’ backside.

Sirius moaned at the tight heat and bit Remus’ shoulder to stop himself from finishing too soon. ‘No, you’ve already had yours. It’s not about you, this is about what he needs. Just wait,’ he thought as he regained his control.

Remus practically screamed as Sirius began to thrust, slow and steady, gently, lovingly. Sam had been right, it was what he needed. It felt different to all the times he had taken Sirius. It was like suddenly being thrown into the fire. Soon enough he found he was thrusting back on Sirius, begging him to go faster, harder, deeper. It was coiling in his belly, deep down inside and the heat from his hard on from hell was beginning to condense. He was so close, he knew it and he was sure Sirius did too. He reached back to thread his fingers in Sirius’ hair, turning his head for a kiss.

“Remus…oh Merlin…love you…” Sirius panted. “…so close…need to…almost…”

“Siri…please….touch…” Remus begged, reaching down to pull to lubricant slick hand away from his hip and wrapping the elegant fingers around his cock. He hissed as his damaged flesh came into contact with the slick substance once more, but it didn’t reduce the rapidity with which he was approaching his long awaited climax.

Sirius stroked him, the same speed as his thrusts, circling the slippery tip with his thumb, kissing and licking his neck almost compulsively, until Remus threw his head back onto his lovers shoulder and screamed. Sirius couldn’t stop his orgasm even if he’d wanted to; Remus clamped down on him too tight for him to hold off. Liquid heat poured from him, spurt after spurt forced from his body as Sirius’ own spendings filled him.

They collapsed on the mattress, face first, Sirius kissing the back of Remus’ head and neck. He couldn’t let go of his werewolf, for fear of losing the connection. He tentatively moved his hand, sighing when he felt that Remus had, at long last, gone down.

“Feel better?” Sirius murmured against his lovers sweat slicked skin as he slipped from his limp sated body.

“Mmmmmm,” Remus hummed. “Much. Thank you.”

Sirius sniggered. “Welcome.”

They lay in silence, basking in the afterglow, until a tentative knock sounded at the door. Remus slipped from the sleeping form of his lover and slowly pulled on his dressing gown, moving to the door. He opened it to find Severus standing there, holding a tray.

“Sam thought you might need something to eat,” the Potions Master said delicately. He motioned to the small jar beside the glasses of red wine. “And…I…well, you put it in the bath…to help with the healing. You only need a little…it’s very efficient. One bath should suffice.”

Remus felt himself blush and felt for sure that he and Severus must match in their red faced appearances. “Thank you,” he said, taking the tray. “You didn’t have to.”

“I know. But we are family…Is everything…all right?”

“Fine, fine. Could you tell Sam that Sirius and I sorted it all out, and that we thank him for his help?”

“Of course. Well…enjoy your meal.”

Remus sniggered at how fast Severus disappeared from sight.

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Severus was beginning to worry. Well, that’s what he told himself. He didn’t actually want to admit that he was terrified. It was easier to say he was just worried.

“Severus, is there something bothering you?”

Severus looked up to see Harry peering anxiously at him. The older wizard blushed and kissed his husband.

“Where were you?” Harry asked as he set aside the essay he was working on for Transfiguration. 

It was a quiet Tuesday afternoon and both Harry and Severus had seen it as an opportunity to do some of the written assignments Harry had been putting off.

“I was…somewhere else,” Severus said evasively.

Harry sniggered and climbed out of his chair, sliding into Severus’ lap to straddle him, kissing him hard. Severus moaned as Harry’s tongue slipped into his mouth, as his slim fingers tangled in his hair. Severus kissed back with just as much passion as his lover.

“So…do you want to talk about it now?” Harry asked as he pulled back. “Or should I just keep kissing you until you give in?”

“You’re not going to leave this one alone are you?” Severus sighed resignedly.

Harry considered that question for a moment. “Nope, so you might as well talk.”

Severus smiled and kissed him gently. “Very well, if you insist.”

“I do.”

The older man took a deep breath. “Solarin has gone silent on me. Well, not just me. Everyone. As far as I can tell, she hasn’t said anything to anyone in about a week.”

“Do you know why?”

“No. This one seems to have no apparent cause.”

Harry pondered it for a moment. From what Severus had told him, and what he had witnessed himself of his sister-in-law, when Solarin didn’t know how to deal with something she clamed up. Admittedly, for Severus to be worried, this was a new thing. As far as Harry knew, Solarin had never gone silent for this long.

“Are you really worried?” Harry questioned.

“No! Of course not,” Severus said, far too quickly for Harry to hide his smile. Severus sighed. “Maybe…just a little. I’m her brother, I’m allowed to be…aren’t I?”

“Of course. But if she’s not willing to talk, you can’t force it. You know what she’ll do, she’ll clam up even more than she already is. Give her time before you start panicking.”

“I am not panicking. I am simply worried. There is no panic.”

Harry grinned and leaned in once more, kissing Severus deep. “How about I take your mind off things?” he whispered. “Because…you know…we have Miri being watched and everyone under strict instructions to leave us alone so we can get this essay done.”

“Then shouldn’t you be working on said essay?”

“I’m finished. Which is why I pushed it away. So how about you shut up and kiss me?”

Severus grinned and leant in, kissing Harry hard and deep, making the sprite moan and clutch at him, tugging at his hair. Severus reached out and swept everything off the table, standing slightly so he could lay Harry back on the smooth wooden surface. Harry moaned and tugged at Severus’ clothes, trying to remove them while maintaining mouth-to-mouth contact, their tongues duelling. Severus chuckled and pulled his mouth away, standing back and pulling off his jumper and shirt, ripping off the buttons in the process.

“Better?” the older wizard murmured as he returned to kissing his husband.

“Much,” Harry gasped as he tilted his head back, leaving his throat open to his lovers talented lips. He swept his hands down Severus’ chest, his fingertips trailing along the mans taught stomach to his waistband, pulling open the buttons.

Severus felt desire flood his system in a frenzy, making his blood surge through his veins. He couldn’t help the way he tore off Harry’s t-shirt, his lips sealing around a nipple and sucking hard, scrapping a little with his teeth.

“Oh, sweet Merlin!” Harry gasped. “Don’t stop…please…Severus…don’t stop!”

“Not stopping,” Severus moaned, pulling back to divest Harry of the rest of his clothes, dropping his own trousers and boxers to pool around his ankles. He whimpered as Harry reached down and stroked him, the fingers of his other hand tangling in his hair to pull him down for another kiss.

“Severus…please!”

Severus slipped a finger into the sprite and stroked the tight channel, the youth rocking his hips in time to the caressing touch, wrapping his legs around his waist. Severus smiled cruelly and added another finger, teasing the tender flesh.

Harry growled and shoved Severus away so hard the Potions Master fell into his chair, stunned by the change in events.

“You need to learn not to tease me,” Harry growled, climbing into Severus’ lap and straddling him, reaching up to pinch his nipples.

“Holy fuck,” Severus breathed. “Oh God!”

Harry grinned and guided himself down onto the waiting hard shaft with a moan. Severus’ hands fell onto his spine, pulling him forwards to lock lips as Harry’s body adjusted around his tumescent member. Harry began to move, slowly at first, Severus’ delicate fingers curling around the slim hips to guide Harry to move around him. The tight heat was perfect around his aching organ and he couldn’t help but groan at the fluid arching of his husband as it pulled him closer and closer to completion.

He latched onto Harry’s neck and sucked at it, moving round to nibble at his earlobe. He worked his hand down between them and stroked the little nub, pulling Harry to orgasm.

Pleasure, pure pleasure, coursed through both of them, sweeping away everything else, leaving them breathless.

A while later, when the sweat had cooled and they were content just to sit there, still connected, Harry raised his head and licked the bite marks he had left on Severus’ pale shoulder.

“I didn’t mean to do that,” Harry murmured.

“Don’t worry. It’s fine,” Severus said, kissing the red lips. “I don’t mind.”

Harry smiled shyly. “I keep forgetting you like it rough.”

Severus chuckled, slipping from the sated body in the process. “I like it any way I can get it with you. Rough, gentle, fast, slow, it makes no difference. As long as it’s with you, I love it.”

Harry sniggered and kissed Severus once more. “So, did I take you mind off things?”

“Undoubtedly.”

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George looked around and tried not to run as fast as he could out the door and back to his nice quiet life of denial.

But he didn’t. He strode over to the bar and yelled to the bartender that he wanted a beer, hoping he had been heard. He turned around, leaning back against the bar and surveying the crowded space.

It wasn’t what he had really expected a gay bar to be like. He had half expected to see an orgy, but it wasn’t like that at all. It was just like any other bar: the loud thump thump of the music, the press of bodies, the smell of alcohol. The only difference was that men were dancing with other men and women were dancing with other women.

And, most surprisingly of all to George, he wasn’t finding any issue with it. He felt quite comfortable, to be honest. The bar tender returned with his beer and he paid for it, taking a long drink.

“Well, you were one guy I felt for sure was straight.”

George turned around to see who it was that the voice belonged to. And grinned sheepishly at Oliver Wood.

“And I thought you were engaged to Angelina,” the redhead said.

“Vicious rumour started by her sister after I wouldn’t sleep with her. So…your first trip to a gay bar?”

George groaned. “Am I that obvious?”

“You have that rabbit-caught-in-headlights, oh-God-what-am-I-doing, why-did-I-think-this-was-a-good-idea look. Don’t worry, I don’t think anyone else noticed. So, when did you figure it out?”

George felt himself blush right up to the roots of his flaming red hair. 

“Ah, I see. You haven’t figured it all out yet, have you?”

“Yes! Of course I have! Would I be here if I hadn’t?”

Oliver smiled and leaned against the bar. “Relax. No one here is judging. It’s the way most of us, if not all of us, figured it all out. We all had nights like you’re having.”

“Really?”

“Really. So, on a scale of one to ten, how badly do you want to run for the door right now?”

“About a four,” George said honestly, smiling as Oliver grinned at him.

“Only a four? Well, there might be hope for you yet. Just let me know when you’re ready for me to ask you to dance.”

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George giggled as he led Oliver through the house, their hands entwined.

He and his ex-captain had talked the night away, eventually ending up on the dance floor, where George had bravely leaned in to kiss the taller man. It had gone swiftly from there to a passionate discussion, heated with kisses and caresses, as to where they would go after the club.

They couldn’t go back to Oliver’s, his flatmate had his mother staying. And they couldn’t go back to George’s because Fred was there and completely unaware of where George was and what he was doing. A hotel seemed too impersonal.

So there was only one place they could go. George’s part time bedroom at Grimmauld Place.

“Shhh!” Oliver hissed, pulling the beater back to kiss him breathless. “Quiet remember. You’re the one who didn’t want to wake anyone.”

“I know,” he whispered back, returning the kiss and reaching down to grope the man’s backside, causing him to thrust against him. “I just can’t help it.”

The whispered conversation drifted off into passionate kisses and gropes, George eventually pushed up against the wall, his arms wrapped around Oliver’s neck.

“I…have a room…upstairs…” the Weasley twin gasped between hot kisses filled with tongue and lust. “It has…a bed…my room…with all the stairs.”

“I’d love…to see…”

George broke the kiss, pushing off from the wall and dragging his…what was Oliver now? His friend? Boyfriend? Lover? Maybe it was the substantial amounts of beer and vodka he had consumed or the interesting things Oliver’s hand in his was making him feel, but he didn’t really feel all too nervous about what he assumed was about to happen. 

They made it up the stairs, to the door and inside the room, Oliver warding, locking and silencing it, before they managed to find their way to the bed. They fell down onto it, pulling at clothes, touching at skin. 

Oliver pulled back and brushed the wayward ginger fringe from George’s blue eyes. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to touch you like this,” he murmured, sliding his warm hand down George’s smooth bare torso, ending up on the waistband of his jeans.

“Really?”

“All the time I thought you were straight, it damn near broke me…knowing I could never have you.” He paused. “You are…okay with this…right? Me and you and…the touching and stuff? You’re okay?”

“Surprisingly yeah, I am. I like the touching…and stuff. It’s…nice.” He chuckled. “I guess that’s a stupid word but…it is.”

“It’s a good word for this. Just…if I do something you don’t like…or if this is too much for you, if you’re not ready for this, you can tell me. I’ll stop if you’re not ready. I won’t be mad or anything. I’ll understand.”

George reached up and pulled him down for a kiss, invading the older mans mouth with his tongue. “I’ll let you know.”

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Severus covertly watched his sister across the breakfast table. She didn’t eat anything and barely sipped her coffee. Dorian looked miserable too. And Bill looked as worried as Severus felt.

“Morning all,” Fred said as he breezed into the kitchen. “Ooo, bacon.” He took a seat at the table and helped himself to some food. “So, where is he then? Still in bed, I bet, lazy whatsit.”

“Who are you talking about?” Charlie asked, passing Nixie a blueberry muffin and stealing a quick kiss.

“George. He didn’t come home last night so I thought he’d be here. He is here…right?”

“I didn’t hear him come in,” Molly said, casting a worried glance at her silent daughter-in-law as she placed a pile of flapjacks on the table. “Where did he go?”

“I don’t know,” Fred said. “He just said he needed some time to himself.”

“Maybe he hooked up with someone and spent the night at hers,” Ron reasoned with a filthy grin, sniggering at Harry’s blush and embarrassed smile. 

Sirius choked on his sip of coffee, drowning into a hacking cough. Remus patted him on the back.

“Excuse me,” Sirius rasped. “It went down the wrong pipe. George is probably still in bed, if he’s here. I’ll go check his room.”

Sirius stood up and moved to the door. He made his way up the stairs and raised his hand to knock, but his knuckles never met the wood.

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George slowly opened his eyes, feeling the pound of a hangover and the residual ache of last night’s athleticism. He grinned at the latter, and the muscular naked body pressed against his back. And then he groaned at the major league headache behind his eyes.

“Oh sweet Merlin, my head,” he moaned, feeling the chuckle of his bed partner.

“Here,” Oliver said, pressing a little bottle into his hand. “Ease the hangover. Don’t worry, I didn’t brew it.”

George tilted his head up only enough to tip the contents of the bottle down his throat and then collapsed back onto the pillow again.

“How much did we drink?” the redhead moaned.

“I lost track after we switched to vodka. I think we got pissed sometime between the first dance and that very nice first kiss you pulled me into. So…apart from your hangover…how are you this morning? Are you…okay?” Oliver asked tentatively, almost afraid of the answer.

George smiled and rolled over, wrapping himself around Oliver and kissing him.

“I’m sore…but in the good way,” he said when they finally detached to breathe, still holding each other, feeling the others warm skin against their own. “Last night was…it was…I don’t really have a word for it. But the word is in the good column. A good word.”

“I’m glad. So, you enjoyed it?”

“Does hell yeah give you an idea of how much I enjoyed it?” the redhead said with a cheeky grin.

The brunet chuckled. “A little. Does this mean you would like to have more of me…in the not a one night stand kind of way?”

“I didn’t think last night was a one night kind of thing…was it? Did I get it wrong? Was it a one night thing?” George asked worriedly.

“No, you didn’t misread. Not a one night deal. If you don’t want it to be…I could be yours…if you want…”

George pulled him in for a kiss, silencing him. “I want.” He peered at the bright morning light filtering through the window and moaned. “When did morning happen?”

“After the stars went away.” He chuckled at the confused look George gave him, kissing the tip of his nose, sliding his hand down to caress the firm backside he found. “Somewhere between the third time and the falling asleep. You know, last night, when you said you could go a fourth time, I did think you were being a little optimistic.”

“Hmmm, maybe a little…but we could try for that fourth time right now.”

“You know, that sounds like a plan.”

Oliver leaned in to kiss the redhead beneath him, sliding his hand around to cup him, but he never managed either target.

The house shook with the force of an earthquake, pictures falling, glass breaking, unspeakable power coursing through the whole house, followed by the overwhelming feeling of despair and pain.

“What the fuck was that?” Oliver asked.

“I have no idea, but it can’t be good. We should go and deal with it.”

Oliver nodded and the two of them hurriedly pulled on their clothes, running out of the room only to bump into Sirius.

“Sorry, Sirius,” George said and then flushed deep red a she realised he and Oliver had yet to put their shirts on. “Oh…ummm…Oliver, you remember Sirius, right? And Sirius, you remember Oliver?”

“Yeah, we remember. But now is really not the time,” Sirius said. “Did you feel that?”

“The overwhelming pit of despair that threatened to suck us in and bleed us dry? Oh yeah, we felt it,” Oliver said as they moved downstairs at speed, pulling on their shirts. “What was it?”

“No clue,” Sirius said.

“Do things like this happen a lot around here?” Oliver asked.

“You get used to it in this house,” George said as they entered the kitchen.

The whole room was filled with smoke, flames leaping up from what appeared to be a chair and dancing across the table, incinerating everything in their path. There was the smell of burning and a feeling of overwhelming misery. The entire scene was pandemonium, everyone reaching for their children, trying to put out the flames, screaming and crying filling the air.

The three men rushed forwards, checking that people were all right, trying to put out the flames.

When it was all over, and the lingering smoke was floating out of the window to the garden, it was Bill and Severus who really started to panic.

“Where is Solarin?” Severus asked, a quiver in his voice and a tremble in his knees. The whole family looked towards where she had been sitting, a chair that was now just a pile of ashes. “Where is she?”

“Oh Merlin,” Bill gasped. “Where is she?”

The tall redhead was even going as far as to look under the table, he was that frantic.

Oliver coughed to get everyone’s attention. “I saw her, when we were coming down the stairs. She was running out the front door.”

“Running? Why?” Harry questioned, cuddling Miri to try and calm her.

Everyone fell silent and looked to Severus for the answer, but the black eyed wizard seemed to be measuring up his husband.

“How long exactly has she been silent?” the Potions Master questioned the inhabitants of the room.

“About a week, ten days maybe,” Arthur said, scooping Dorian up into his arms to try and soothe the sobbing child.

Bill couldn’t blame his son for crying, he was more than half way to being in the same state. He wanted to be the one to hold him, comfort him, tell him everything would be all right. But he didn’t believe it, so he couldn’t. With Dorian being what he was, there was no way for Bill to hold his son and not have the little boy feel what he was feeling.

“Harry, Ron, Hermione, come with me. Bill, is there anything in your bedroom you would rather we didn’t know of?” Severus asked the curse breaker.

“No, not that I can think of. Why?”

“Because these three are going to search it. If Sol is hiding something, the best place to look for a clue is her bedroom. And, as we all know all too well, these three are the best ones to look for it. They have a knack of finding things one would rather leave buried.” 

The ex-professor raised an eyebrow at the three teens at Bill’s reassurance that there was nothing he would rather leave hidden and the three made their way up to the augur’s bedroom.

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Solarin stumbled blindly through the crowd of Oxford Street, unsure as to where she was actually going. She had been walking for hours and the midday sun did nothing to dissipate the freezing January cold.

It was such a stupid thing to be upset about. All Molly had done was stroke Ron’s hair. But it was such a motherly thing to do. And it all came crashing down upon her.

Had her mother ever stroked her hair? Had her mother ever touched her at all?

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“This is hopeless,” Ron said, looking down at his friends from where he was peering at the top of the wardrobe. “Do we really think a sophisticated witch like Sol is going to leave things just lying around for us to find?”

Harry wriggled out from under the bed, covered in dust, and Hermione looked up at him from where she was rifling through Solarin’s underwear drawer, something the boys had refused to do while sporting spectacular blushes.

“They’re worried,” Harry said. “Hell, we’re all worried. It won’t hurt any to have a look around, to see if she’s been careless.”

“Harry’s right,” Hermione agreed, shoving her hand to the very back of the drawer and feeling her way. “Everyone slips up, especially when they’re upset.”

So they continued searching, not really sure what they were looking for until Harry found a hidden panel in the bottom of Solarin’s wardrobe. Underneath it, the three teens found a single slip of paper and a tiny golden key.

“Severus,” Ron called. “We found something. No idea what it is, but it was hidden.”

Harry held the paper and key up to his husband, who scanned both before looking incredibly confused.

“What is it?” Oliver asked from the door. He looked exceedingly harassed. He had spent the morning being ‘initiated’ into the Weasley family by Molly and Fred. He could eat no more, answer no more questions and looked thoroughly relieved to be out of the kitchen and away from his lover’s scary mother and twin. 

“It’s a visiting slip from Gringotts and a Gringotts key. But I don’t understand why she would hide these things,” Severus said.

“But her Gringotts key is on her necklace, she was wearing it this morning. Don’t you remember, Miri kept trying to grab it,” Ron said.

“If her key is around her neck, then who does that one belong to?” Hermione questioned.

Severus looked at the young couple before making his way to his own room, where he set about rummaging in his bedside cabinet.

“It is my key,” he announced. “Not the key to my personal vault, that’s still here. This one is from the Snape family vault. It was my mother’s. But why would Solarin hide this?”

Within the next ten minutes, it had been decided that Bill and Severus would go to Gringotts to try and figure out why Solarin had been hiding the key.

“So, what is in this vault?” Bill asked as they passed through the Leaky Cauldron.

“After my mother died, I took all of her personal belongings, clothes, shoes, diaries, wand, and such things, and put them all in the vault. I couldn’t bring myself to look at them and Solarin was a mess. It was better that she and I got on with our lives, without a constant reminder of what we’d lost,” Severus said as they strode along the cobbled street, hurrying towards the huge marble building. “Anything?”

Bill had been trying to force his way through the bond, desperately attempting to get Solarin to talk to him. But it was all for nothing and he had just given himself a headache.

“Nothing. She’s completely shut me out,” Bill said as they hurried across the marble foyer. He glanced at the visiting slip in his hand, before heading towards the back offices, goblins and other curse breakers nodding at him in greeting. “Come on, Minpin is the goblin she saw, we might as well start there.”

After some desperate pleading and promises of favours Bill would owe in the future, Minpin did indeed show them down to the vault. The only problem was, the female goblin prided herself on her discretion and ability to perform her job well, so she had not seen what Solarin had looked at. All she could tell them was the witch had been fine when she entered the vault, and devastated when she left.

“Oh well, it’ll have to do,” Severus sighed as the goblin opened the vault for them. 

It was a decent size vault, neither tiny or gapingly large but big enough to hold all the junk Severus had shoved into it. Bill was surprised to see pieces of furniture as well as supposed personal items. He stepped in and reached out to touch a dusty old rocking chair.

“It was my grandmother’s. My mother used to sit in it and knit,” Severus said quietly, and then swore as he walked into a large trunk that had been left in the middle of the floor. “What the fuck!” he cried, holding onto his bruised shin. “I didn’t leave that there.”

“I think we just figured out what she looked at,” Bill said as he moved across the space to look into the box, Severus sinking into his mother’s old rocking chair to examine his leg.

The redhead began rummaging through the box, but he didn’t have to look long. One battered old diary was lying open on top of the rest of things shoved into the trunk. He picked it up and found his eye drawn to a glint of gold. He reached for it and found it to be a tiny little bottle with a gold top. 

He slowly read through the diary entry staring him in the face and felt his stomach turn over. He couldn’t say anything, he could barely breathe. After what seemed like an eternity of silently sitting, staring at the page in his hand, a single word bubbled up, out of his mouth.

“No,” he breathed.

Severus looked up from fixing his shin to find his brother-in-law sitting on the floor, silent tears streaming from his eyes, his face a mask of horror. He reached out and grabbed the diary and the bottle, scanning the page quickly before his own stomach flipped over.

“We’re going home. We know all we need to.”

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Ron was trying to distract Harry by letting him win at chess, but it wasn’t working and he suspected that Harry knew what he was up to.

Dorian wouldn’t let go of Arthur, and he wouldn’t stop crying for his mother, the sound grating on everyone. Miri was whimpering at the tension in the room, clinging to Harry as she tried to squirm away from the emotions.

Harry was trying his best to focus on the game, but it was no use. He was missing his husband and worried about Solarin. 

Just as Harry had lost his bishop in a move Ron just couldn’t resist, there was a slam of the front door and Severus and Bill entered. Neither of them said a word and the whole kitchen went as silent as a tomb.

“What is it?” Molly asked as Harry handed Miri to Anne. “Did you find her?”

“No,” Ron said, looking at his brother. “They found something else.” He stood and made his way across the room, pulling his brother into a hug and leading him into the nearest chair. “Come on, Bill. Sit down.”

“We found…ummm…there was…” Severus tried several times to get the words out but they just wouldn’t come, so he dropped the diary onto the table and let Harry pull him into his arms. Severus sank to the floor, Harry going with him, until the older man was cradled in his husband’s arms, gut wrenching sobs forcing themselves from his throat.

Remus motioned to Nixie to take Dorian upstairs, which she did as Hermione reached for the diary. She opened it to the well-read page and scanned it, her mouth dropping open as she read it. 

“Oh,” she breathed. “Is this true?”

“Seems to be…if this is any indication,” Severus sobbed, passing her the tiny bottle.

Hermione took it and found the secret compartment in the lid, an old practice often used by forgetful brewers. It contained a tiny scroll of paper, on which the ingredients of the potion in the bottle were written. Hermione knew enough to know what it would do, should Solarin drink it.

“I found the bottle…on her body…I just…shoved it away.”

“Read it out,” Bill said, his voice hollow. “Read it out.”

Hermione took a deep breath, feeling it was best to just comply, and began to read.

“Please, Merlin, save me for this. I can’t believe I’m doing this. But it’s for the best, all for the best. She’s so tiny, but so dangerous. If I had known…No, best not to think such things. This is the best way.”

She paused, her eyes flicking up to look at Bill, who nodded for her to continue.

“Tobias would never understand. All these years, he’s just tried to protect her, in his way, trying to beat the magic out of her, telling her to stay hidden. He won’t understand what I have to do, what only I can do. It killed him to lose Serena. But this…he wouldn’t understand. I’m sparing her…I’m saving her.”

She pushed the book across the table to Charlie, finding herself unable to read anymore. The dragon tamer picked it up and found where the young witch had left off before continuing on.

“I will take her to the river, today, after Severus has gone out. He would try and stop me, he wouldn’t understand either. No one will. But it must be done, I have to save her, and all the rest. It can’t be controlled, so it must be destroyed. And if it kills her to do so, so be it.”

“Wait…did that just say…kill?” Arthur questioned. “Who’s diary is that? Who is it talking about?”

Bill stood up and reached for the bottle of vodka, taking a healthy swig. “It’s Eileen’s,” he said. “Arin’s mother. She wrote it. And she’s talking about my wife.” 

He stood there, his mouth hanging open as the full weight of what he had just said hit him.

“Oh!” he gasped, his knees going weak, Ron just catching him before he hit the floor. Bill let his brother hold him as he felt the crush of the realisation hit him, pounding in his chest.

Everyone was silent, until the Floo sprang to life and expelled Moody and Dumbledore into the room. They didn’t ask questions, they simply took the diary as it was offered to them by Charlie and read through it.

Moody took a seat, as crushed by it as Severus. But Albus brought some hope. He made his way over to his former Potions Professor and crouched down.

“Severus,” the old wizard said.

“Save it, Albus,” Severus snarled. “Save your claptrap about this all being all right!”

“I wasn’t going to suggest such a thing,” Albus said, passing him a tissue. “I came to tell you that she is at Hogwarts.”

“What?”

“Solarin. She is curled up in the Forbidden Forest with the centaurs. Hagrid found her about half an hour ago. Alastair and I have tried to talk to her, but all she does is sob and wail and ask why. Considering what I have just read, do I really have to question why she is crying?”

Harry stroked Severus’ hair away from his eyes and tilted his chin to place a gentle kiss to his lips.

“Go,” Harry said, gently but leaving no room for argument. “She needs you right now…more than I do. I’ll be fine here, really. Just promise me you won’t come back without her, even if you have to stun her and drag her by her hair.”

Severus chuckled and kissed him before climbing to his feet and looking at Bill.

“Are you coming?”

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Severus slowly approached his sister alone. Bill had been in no fit state to see anyone and had locked himself in the bathroom to try and calm down.

The depressed augur was blue in her coldness, and her tears had frozen to her cheeks. The centaurs startled at his footsteps crunching in the snow and then slowly moved away, leaving the witch to Severus’ care.

“I’m cold, Sevus,” she whispered. He pulled out a handkerchief and transfigured it into a blanket, wrapping it around her.

He picked her up and slowly trudged up to Hagrid’s hut, empty as the groundskeeper had offered it to Severus and made himself scarce. Severus sat Solarin down in front of the fire and fixed her some tea.

It was well over four hours before she spoke again.

“Did you find it?” she whispered, curled up in Severus’ comforting embrace in a big squashy armchair in front of the roaring fire.

“I found it,” Severus murmured. He sighed and pressed a kiss to her dark hair. “Why didn’t you tell me, sweetheart? You should have come to me.”

“I couldn’t. I couldn’t say it.”

She began to cry again, clinging to Severus so tightly he knew he would have bruises. He held her, stroking back her hair, holding in his own tears.

“I’m sorry,” she sobbed.

“What on earth for?” Severus asked. “Solarin, why are you telling me that you’re sorry? What are you apologising for?”

“For being like this. My own mother couldn’t love me…and you got lumbered with me…I’m sorry…for ruining your life…for being so disgusting.”

Severus stood up and deposited her into the armchair, stalking across the room to gulp down some Firewhisky before forcing the distraught witch to look at him.

“Now, you listen to me, and you listen good, young lady,” he snarled. “If I EVER hear you say anything like that again, I will curse you into your next lifetime! How dare you place the blame on your shoulders! I have never considered myself lumbered with you, raising you was never a chore!”

“But she tried to kill me! She hated me!”

“Fuck her! Fuck what she thought!” He wiped away her fresh tears. “The moment I took you on, my life became something worthwhile. Never once have I regretted raising you. I worried I was doing a good job, yes, but never have I felt regret. You were the best thing in my life.”

She stared at him for a moment, her suspicious eyes peering into his. “Really?”

“Really. Solarin, I may not be your father by blood but I have never thought of you in any other way. I love you, with everything I have. Our mother…” He broke off as she looked away, her face a mask of utter pain. He forced her to look him in the eye before he continued. “Our mother had no idea how wonderful you are. She never bothered to find out. And, if she had, she would have seen what I see every single day, every time I look at you. You, my beautiful strong baby sister, are not special. You are extraordinary and I am in awe of you every single moment.”

They were silent for a while after that, Severus letting Solarin curl up in his lap to cry once more.

“Does everyone know?” she whispered as the dusk began to approach.

“Yes, everyone knows.”

“And…Bill?”

“He is, understandably, very upset that someone would, as he put it, ‘deign to even think about hurting his girl’. He didn’t feel calm enough to come and see you. He felt it best to wait until he stopped wanting to kill someone.”

She nodded, staring into the blazing fire, her mind full of thoughts.

“Dorian doesn’t know. We felt it best to wait for you decide what you and Bill wish him to know…he hasn’t stopped crying since you left.”

She moaned in pain for the distress she was causing the little boy.

“Maybe I shouldn’t have adopted him,” she whispered. “Maybe he would have been better without me.”

“No, don’t talk like that. He loves you. You are his mother.”

“Does Molly think that?” she asked, challengingly.

And, all at once, Severus understood at least part of her pain and distress a little better.

“Is that what this is? You think Molly would rather you hadn’t married her son? You think Molly would rather you stayed away from your own son?”

“Doesn’t she feel that way? My own mother couldn’t love me…why would Molly have any reason to think I’m good enough?”

Severus looked at her and then got to his feet, standing her up in the process. “We’re going home. You can talk to her yourself.”

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Harry curled into Remus’ arms, the stresses of the day beginning to get to him. He felt his old panic rising up within him as minute after minute ticked by and still Severus didn’t appear.

“Hush, pup, it’s all right,” Remus soothed, stroking his hair, Harry looking down to realise his hands were shaking.

“Where is he?” Harry whispered. “It’s getting late.”

“He’ll be back, he promised he would,” Sirius said as he set a calming draught in front of his godson, letting Harry grip his hand tight enough to break bone. “Has Severus ever broken a promise to you?”

“No,” he said as he dutifully took his potion.

“I wish you’d eat something,” Molly said.

Harry looked over to Bill and Dorian, the latter still crying for his mother.

“Leave him be, mum,” Percy said. “Leave them both be. They’ll eat when they’re ready. A few missed meals won’t kill them.” And then he slapped his hand over his mouth as he realised what he’d said. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have…I didn’t think.”

“It’s fine,” Bill said, the most coherent anyone had heard him be since Severus had left. 

Molly huffed and busied herself by making yet more tea. In all honesty, Harry never wanted to see another bloody cup of tea as long as he lived, but he didn’t want to upset the Weasley matriarch, so he accepted his mug and took a tiny sip.

Just as Harry managed to force down the last sip of his tea, Severus strolled into the kitchen, Solarin hovering in the doorway.

“Oh, thank Merlin,” Bill said, rushing across the room and sweeping his wife into a hug. Dorian was right behind him, and pummelled on Bill’s backside to get in on the embrace.

Solarin pulled away and lifted Dorian into her arms, burying her face in the little boys neck to inhale his scent. He clung to her, twining his little fingers in her hair.

“I’m sorry, baby,” she whispered. “I’m sorry.”

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	9. Chapter Nine

Harry snuffled into his pillow, opening his eyes slowly. It was still dark outside, Miri’s monitor was silent and he hadn’t had a bad dream. So, why was he awake at…Harry groaned as his gaze landed on the glow in the dark bedside clock.

Five in the morning.

Why the hell was he awake at this godforsaken hour?

“No…no…”

Harry rolled over to look at his husband, who was crying and muttering in his sleep. Ah, so that was why he was awake. He gently wiped away his lovers tears.

“Severus,” he called softly. “Wake up, Severus.”

Severus sighed in his sleep and wriggled a little. Harry couldn’t help but smile.

“It’s in the cauldron,” Severus murmured.

Harry stifled a giggle. “What’s in the cauldron? It’s a dream…come back to me,” he whispered, sliding across the bed to curl into Severus’ hold. Those long, strong arms tightened around him and he laid a gentle kiss on Severus’ throat.

“Harry? Are you all right, love?” Severus questioned sleepily.

“I’m fine. Are you? You were talking in your sleep, crying as well.”

“Ah. Just a bad dream, nothing serious,” Severus reassured. “It’s still early, don’t you want to go back to sleep?” he questioned as Harry slipped his hands inside his pyjama top.

“I might drift back off,” Harry said, rubbing his fingertips along Severus’ warm stomach. “I’m just enjoying being here with you at the moment.”

He could feel Severus’ smile as he rolled him onto his back, ducking his head and capturing his lips in a sweet kiss. Harry whimpered into it, wrapping his arms around Severus’ neck, letting his tongue venture forth to taste his husband, Severus gladly allowing entrance to his mouth. They chased the others tongue back and forth, hands travelling along sleep warmed skin. Harry couldn’t get enough of the taste of his lover. Sweet and hot with something smoky and dangerous just hinted at underneath it all.

Severus moaned as Harry’s leg slid up to rest on his hip, those wonderful hands buried in his hair, tongue licking at his own.

They broke off to breathe, sipping the occasional kiss from swollen lips.

“Hmmm, I like making out,” Harry said, the older man chuckling at him.

“Me too. I like knowing that I can spend as much time as I like holding you and kissing you without any pressure to go further. It’s very nice, sort of…soothing. Well, not really, but you know what I mean.”

“I do.” Harry slid his hand along Severus’ arm until he could entwine their fingers. “So, do you want to talk yet?”

Severus took a deep breath. It had been a week since the discoveries had been made about Eileen and her opinion of her daughter. In that week Solarin had begun to speak again, but only when she had to, and she still had the tendency to burst into tears at odd intervals. Severus had not been taking it well. He felt so utterly and completely powerless to help his beloved sister. So, as a result of pent up caring emotions, Harry had been the target of all his nurturing.

Harry had taken it all without complaint: the hugs, the kisses, the touching him all the time, the watching his every move, the way Severus kept cutting up his dinner and asking him if he was all right. Harry had held his tongue and let his husband do what he had to. Even if it was annoying him beyond compare.

“I have no idea what to say,” Severus admitted. “You know how I’m feeling, you’re the one who has had to put up with me. And I do know how annoying I’m being, love. I am sorry about it.”

“I know. It’s okay.”

“It’s not just her I’m worried about. What about Dorian? I felt for sure he would never let her go when I brought her back, and now he barely lets her out of his sight. Even Bill can’t calm him down.”

“He’ll be fine. He just needs time, they all do, we all do. And I do understand how worried you are, really.”

Severus smiled down at him and leaned in to kiss him again. He laid his forehead against Harry’s and sighed.

“How could she?” he whispered, not really expecting an answer. “I always thought my mother loved Solarin. And now…now I don’t know what to think. It’s all screwed up in my head. My mother tried to kill my sister, my father was trying to protect us…in his way.” He sighed. “Part of me believes my mother really did love Solarin, at least part of her, she had to, no one is that good an actor. But with this new knowledge…It doesn’t make sense.”

“I don’t think it’s meant to. I don’t think we’re meant to understand any of it. Severus…please, stop torturing yourself over this. You didn’t know, no one did. Stop trying to take the blame when it isn’t yours to take,” Harry pleaded.

Severus smiled at him. “I suppose I try and take the blame for quite a lot.”

“Yes, you do. There’s nothing wrong with it, it shows us you care. But you can’t emotionally torture yourself over this forever. Sooner or later, you’ll realise I’m right.”

Severus sighed. He didn’t want to admit it but Harry was right. He wasn’t to blame for anything his mother had tried to do to Solarin. She hadn’t succeeded in her attempt at murder, and for that Severus would always be forever thankful to his father, something he never thought he would ever feel. 

But knowing the truth of the situation didn’t make him feel any better.

Severus stared down at his husband, taking in all the beautiful features he loved so much.

“I had an idea the other day,” Severus said with a small smile.

“An idea? And tell me why I shouldn’t think of this as a way to change the subject?”

“It is a way to change the subject. But you’ll like my idea.”

Harry giggled. “Okay, I’ll let you change the subject. So, what is this idea?”

“A trip to the zoo.”

Harry couldn’t help it, he burst into a fit of laughter. “The zoo? That’s you’re idea? I thought it was something major, like moving house or something.”

Severus sniggered. “Nothing so drastic. I’m not talking about a trip like the one where you let the snake loose. I was thinking about a trip to Countess Cora’s Land Of Magic. It’s a magical zoo, it’s in Wales.”

“A magical zoo? Really?”

“Really. I took Solarin there when she was little. I thought it would be something Miri would like. And, seeing as you’ve only ever been to that paltry excuse for a zoo with your Aunt and Uncle, it is something you should absolutely get to experience.”

Harry laid there considering it while Severus devoted himself to tasting the tender skin of his throat.

“You really want to go?” Harry gasped, and then moaned as Severus nipped at a particularly sensitive bit of skin.

“I do…but only if you feel comfortable with the idea of going out,” Severus murmured, unbuttoning a few of Harry’s pyjama top buttons and dipping down to nibble at a nipple.

“Ab…oh…absolutely.”

And, with that settled, they both decided that making out just wasn’t enough of a way to start the day.

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Solarin watched as Dorian tried to heave the huge ball of snow on top of the other one he had made. If he managed it, the snowman would be bigger than he was. 

“I did offer to help but he told me he wanted to do it by himself,” she murmured as Molly sat down beside her on the garden bench. “And I know I shouldn’t be smoking in front of him.”

Molly smirked at the cigarette Solarin was grinding under her heel. “Seeing a few bad habits won’t kill him. And Bill was just the same, always wanting to do it himself, never wanting any help.” She chuckled. “He’s still like that.”

The Weasley matriarch cast a sideways glance at her daughter-in-law and wondered if maybe Severus had been right. The Potions Master had warned Molly that Solarin was a difficult witch to talk to at the best of times, and now would be a very bad time to try and get through to her. But Molly couldn’t stand sitting back and doing nothing while one of her family was in pain.

Molly knew that a bond between a mother and a daughter was important to a young woman. Even more so once that woman became a mother herself. Molly sometimes missed her own mother more than she could bear, and she couldn’t imagine something…anything, coming between her and Ginny. Nothing her daughter could ever do would ever make her feel any differently. So, with all this in mind, she thought maybe a woman’s touch would be the best way to approach Solarin.

The only problem was, she didn’t know where to start.

“I was thinking…maybe your steak pie would go down well for dinner. And…that cake you made for Christmas…the one with the icing. Maybe you could adapt it. It went down well,” Molly said cautiously.

“Maybe,” Solarin agreed.

The two women watched as Dorian finally resorted to using his magic and levitated the ball of snow to the desired position. He looked thoroughly impressed with himself, and set about scouring the garden for twigs to use as hair.

“You know…I never wanted this,” Solarin said as she lit another cigarette. 

“Wanted…what?”

“This,” she said, motioning to Dorian and then to her wedding ring. “Marriage…children. I never imagined myself walking down the aisle. Even when I was a little girl, I never pretended my dolls were babies. It just wasn’t something I ever saw for my life. And then…Bill happened. I met him and everything changed. I knew what Bill wanted, I would have been blind not to see it. He had so many sibling. Always having a baby around. I would have had to be a complete fool not to realise what Bill’s vision of the future contained.” She sighed, smiling at her son. “And, before I even realised it, I wanted it too. I wanted it all…maybe even more than Bill did.”

Molly sensed that this would not be the time to speak, though she had a million things running through her mind at that precise moment.

“Then I realised that maybe I could marry Bill…that I trusted him enough…that there was enough love between us to make a marriage work…really work.” She chuckled. “I wasn’t even nervous saying my vows.”

“I was,” Molly said. “Terrified. I loved Arthur, I do love Arthur. But it practically took my father dragging me down the aisle. Such a big step…the whole of my life coming down to this one moment. I was all right afterwards.”

They were both silent for a little while.

“When I found out I may never have children, that it’s more likely I’ll never get pregnant…I was so devastated. I felt like I was letting you down…like I was letting everyone down. And then Dorian came into the picture and I felt so complete…like he was all I was missing. But there was still this part of me that was hollow…empty. And then I realised what it was. How could I be a mother when I’d never had one? How would I know what to know when he asks his questions? How would I ever be able to give him that? So…I started looking.”

“The morning we found out about Lucius breaking some friends out of Azkaban…you went down to the lab with Severus. Is that what you were telling him?” Molly questioned gently.

“Yes. I thought he deserved to know what I was doing…she was his mother too.” Solarin paused, smiling slightly as Dorian managed to levitate himself to put the twigs on the snowman, making it look like the winter statue had a bad comb-over. “Do you remember the night that Severus was taken over?”

“The night where he was sort of possessed? The night he attacked Harry…sort of?”

“Yes. And do you remember what I said about the woman who did it? The one in the coma?”

“You said she was an augur.”

“She’s not just an augur. Her name is Evelyn. Evelyn Prince. She’s…well, she was, my mothers sister.”

“An aunt? You and Severus have an aunt?”

“Apparently. We never knew of her. And maybe I’m starting to understand why.” She took a deep breath and looked Molly straight in the eye. “What if my mother knew more about what I am than anyone? With an augur for a sister, she’d seen it, she knew what I’d be growing up to be. Maybe I am something bad, something dangerous. Maybe it would have been better if she’d managed to kill me.”

Molly swore she felt her heart break as Solarin broke their connected gazes. To think that someone could really feel that way about themselves, and that that persons own mother had caused that self-loathing…well, she just couldn’t get her head around it.

“Solarin, you are not something bad.”

“Are you sure?” the depressed younger woman asked the saddened older. “All the magic I have, all the things I can do…maybe I am evil.”

“Rubbish!” Molly exclaimed. “What absolute rubbish! I have seen evil…I lived through two reigns of the Dark Lord. I know evil and you are nothing near.”

Solarin gifted her a fleeting smile. “Maybe. Maybe I’m not evil. But I don’t think I can be something good either.”

Molly chuckled. “I don’t think it works that way. You…well, you’ve chosen the way you want to go. You’re a good witch, Solarin. You’re a good woman. I see that in the way my son is with you, in the happiness you bring him. I see how good you are with all those around you. Now, you’re no saint, oh no. You’re no angel. But no one is. We all have darkness in us…but we all have light as well. We make the choice in which side wins, in the path we take. I don’t believe the future is written in stone. I believe the future is shaped and changed every moment by every decision we make.”

“So you don’t think Bill and Dorian would be better off without a wife and mother who is a murderer? Because you’d be well within your rights to want me out of their lives,” Solarin questioned softly.

Molly finally snapped at that. She couldn’t help it. She pulled Solarin into a hug that could crush bone, stroking her hair and murmuring how wrong she was.

“Bill and Dorian need you. My son needs his wife, and my grandson needs his mother. Now you listen to me, young lady. The moment you came into Bill’s life again, the moment I saw how happy you make him, you became a part of my family. As far as I’m concerned, you are as much my daughter as Ginny,” Molly stated firmly, leaving no room for argument.

It would take time for Solarin to really come to terms with all she now knew. It would take time for the wounds her mothers diary had left to heal.

But Molly’s words had helped ease the pain.

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Every occupant of the kitchen was silent, and all of them were staring at the ceiling.

“Do we know what they’re fighting about?” Remus asked.

“No,” Severus said. “And I may have been an idiot in my past but I am not fool enough to go and see what they’re apparently screaming the house down over.”

“Wise man,” Hermione commented. She herself had tried to intervene and had received a teddy thrown at her head in payment.

No one was quite sure what the fight was about but everyone was very sure that they had never heard Harry scream as loudly or angrily as he was currently screaming at Percy. 

It had started innocently enough: Harry sitting in the playroom with Miri, reading her a story in an attempt to get her off for her afternoon sleep, Percy using the stillness of the room to read through some paperwork. At least, that was what Severus had left when he had gone to add some ingredients to a potion. But, within five minutes of being without his husband, Harry had levitated Miri down to the kitchen and slammed the playroom door shut. They had been yelling now for a solid ten minutes.

They all jumped as a huge explosion rocked the house. Severus sped from the room and up the stairs, closely followed by most of the family.

Severus just made it in time to see his husband storming angrily from the room, his wand in hand, followed by a cloud of smoke.

“Harry, what did you do?” Arthur asked, peering in at his unconscious son.

“Don’t worry, he’ll be fine when he comes around. I didn’t hurt him,” Harry snarled. “But keep him away from me or I can’t guarantee I won’t.”

And, with that, he plucked Miri out of Sirius’ arms and left them to question Percy when he came round.

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Severus slowly made his way up the stairs, taking more time than was actually needed. He didn’t know if he wanted this conversation with Harry but he knew it had to be had. If he was completely honest with himself, Severus had hoped never to have this conversation. If he could have his way, he would bury the subject under a thousand tons of rubble, never to be unearthed again. Sort of like what they had done with Voldemort’s body, which was an analogy he found fitting.

But, Severus would not get his wish. And this conversation, that was so needed and so inevitable, would not go away, and could not be put off any longer.

He made his way to Miri’s nursery, moving slowly and quietly. There Harry was, sitting in the rocking chair with Miri asleep in his arms. The young wizard was staring out the window at the freshly falling snow.

“Is he all right?” Harry murmured as he realised Severus was hovering in the doorway, watching him.

“He is fine…feeling a little foolish…and guilty, but that is to be expected,” Severus said as he settled himself on the low footstool, resting his hands on Harry’s knees. “He told us what he said.”

Harry scowled and Severus reached out to gently take Miri from him, slipping her into her crib and leading Harry to their bedroom.

“My past never really has come up in conversation, has it?” Severus began, letting Harry curl up in the window seat rather than joining him on the bed. “Maybe it should have been.”

“I know what you are, and what you were. I knew when I married you. I knew exactly what I was getting into. Everyone has a past, why should you be any different?” Harry said. “But Percy apparently thinks I don’t know my own mind and you used some Dark art to ‘ensnare’ me. His word, not mine.” He sighed and looked at his husband, those bright green eyes taking Severus’ breath away. “I’m not sure what pisses me off more, to be honest…the fact that he said I was too young and damaged to know what was best for me…or that he dared to insinuate that you would ever hurt me.”

“Well…I’m no stranger to people not trusting me. I wasn’t expecting this from one of the Weasley’s, I’ll be honest, but I’m not surprised by it. I am upset by his apparent illusion that you are an idiot. I’m not even going to try and defend him on that one. I may have called you names to that effect when we were Professor and student, but I do know differently now.”

Harry seemed to be deciding on something, staring at his husband. 

“If I asked you to tell me…you know, about being a Death Eater…would you tell me?” Harry questioned.

“Depends on what you asked me to tell you,” Severus replied honestly. “It’s not that I don’t want you to know, love, not that I’m hiding things from you. But there are some things I just can’t say, the words just won’t come.”

“So…if I asked you to tell me about your initiation…when you joined…could you tell me that?”

Severus thought on it. Could he tell that story? Could he force himself to recount what was one of the worst nights of his life? Parts of it were easy, parts of it he couldn’t remember, and parts of it were more horrific than he had words for. 

“No, I couldn’t tell you,” Severus said, happening upon a sudden idea. “But…if you did want to know, I could show you.”

“Show me?”

“Yes…in your Pensieve. I could show you my memory…if you wanted.”

Harry smiled. “I want.”

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That night, for the first time in no one was quite sure how long, Bill awoke to the gentle movement of his wife finally abandoning the spare room and joining him in the marital bed once more.

And, as Solarin was letting herself sink into the warm embrace of her husband, Harry slipped Miri into her crib and settled the blankets made out of self heating wool over her. They had been a gift from Anne, and Remus had revealed that she was the one to have made the blanket that lay on his and Sirius’ bed in the winter.

He watched her sleep for a few minutes before making his way to his own room, where Severus was waiting, tiny bottle in hand. Harry’s Pensieve was sitting on their bed, waiting for them.

“Are you sure you want to see?” Severus asked, his voice gentle but clear. It was clear to Harry that Severus would rather leave his past hidden. And Harry had known that Severus had a past when he made the choice to enter into a relationship with him. But Harry reasoned that he really should know everything. Severus knew everything about him.

“Yes, I want to see. Do you still want to show it to me?”

“Yes. I have no problems with you seeing it, love. You have a right to know.” Severus paused, peering down at the tiny bottle in his hand, so similar to the one he had given Harry for his birthday. “You need to know that this one is different from the other memories you have stepped into. To obtain this, I had to ask Solarin to contribute her own memory to it. Some parts of that night I have no memory of, so to make this complete I had to ask for her share.”

“How does it make it different?”

“It is different because you can go anywhere. You can decide to go and see Solarin’s memory if my own becomes too much for you. You may follow either of us.”

Severus waited patiently while Harry stared at the glass phial in his hand. After a while, Harry reached for it and pulled the cork out, pouring it into the Pensieve. It swirled, not quite liquid but not a gas either. Harry hesitated before he leant forwards.

“You are coming with me…aren’t you?”

“Of course, love,” Severus said. “After you.”

Harry took a deep breath before leaning forwards and plunging his face into the bowl.

He found himself standing at the gates of a huge manor house, one he recognised all too well. It was obviously late at night, the faintest slither of the moon was bright overhead and the sky was scattered with stars.

“Is that…” Harry began as Severus’ warmth settled against his back.

“Malfoy Manor,” Severus confirmed. “You’ll get to see what Lucius was like when I was younger. I wasn’t much older than you here, about eighteen.”

Severus fell silent as his younger self appeared in front of them, holding a tiny Solarin. It amazed Severus how small she had been, how young. How young he had been. 

Younger Severus put Solarin on her tiny feet and smoothed her green dress, his fingertips sorting through her dark hair. In her arms was a pink stuffed rabbit in its own green dress.

“Now, you remember the rules?” Severus asked her as he refastened one of the buckles on her little black boots.

“Be good, and no peeking,” she recited, looking up at the house. She hugged her bunny. “Don’t like it. Want to go home.”

Severus sighed. “Solarin, sweetheart, listen to me. You are very special, and some people would very much like to use you to do things, things which you would not want. Things that will hurt people. You don’t want to hurt anyone, do you?”

She shook her head.

“Then we must do this. The Dark Lord can offer a lot of protection, protection that we need. I know you want to go home, I do too. But we have to do this.”

The tiny girl sighed and chewed her lower lip before she nodded and let Severus pick her up again as Lucius himself approached the gates.

“You made good time,” he said smoothly.

“I told Albus that Solarin was unwell,” Severus said, following the blond towards the house. The gates clanged ominously behind them.

Harry took hold of his own Severus and tugged him with him as he moved forwards.

Solarin tugged on Severus’ hair to get his attention and then pointed at one of the peacocks on the lawn.

“Pretty,” she said.

“As ever, Lucius, you have no taste. Peacocks on the front lawn?” Severus said with a raised eyebrow.

“Narcissa. She delights in spending my heritage. I swear, that woman never wears the same outfit twice, she has spent that much on clothes.”

“Which is the way you like it, of course.”

Lucius smirked. “Of course.”

Severus stopped just outside the intricately carved double door, reaching out and grabbing Lucius’ arm to stop him.

“Lucius…I just wanted to say…thank you for doing this for me. I do appreciate it,” Severus said.

Lucius smiled, a seemingly genuine smile. “Now, Severus. We are old friends. It is nothing for one to help the other. Now…you do understand that the little one may not go in with you? The Dark Lord will see only you.”

“I understand. Who…who will she be with?”

“Canis has offered to keep an eye on things. Bellatrix and Fenrir will be in the room with her, but Canis will keep order. They will all be on their best behaviour.”

“It’s not Bellatrix or Fenrir misbehaving I worry about,” Severus muttered as he set Solarin down on her feet in the main entrance hall. She locked her dark eyes with his own identical ones as he looked down at her. “Now, Sol, you remember about this bit, don’t you? You know I have to leave you for a little while?”

She nodded.

“Now, Lucius is going to take you to a man called Canis, and you’re going to stay with him and his friends while I have my meeting. So, you promise to be a very good girl for me? You’ll try not to ‘do’ anything?”

“I ‘member, Sevus. Be good, no tricks and no peeking,” she recited, clutching her bunny.

Severus sighed heavily and pushed her towards Lucius. It was as the blond picked her up and moved to one of the dark wood doors that the memory froze. Harry looked around in confusion.

“There is nothing wrong with it, love,” Severus assured, his long arms wrapping around Harry. “It’s not broken. It’s just waiting for you to choose. Which way do you want to go? With younger me? Or with younger Solarin?”

Harry peered between the two Snape siblings, trying to decide. 

“Then again, you can follow Lucius.”

Harry craned his head, looking at his husband in puzzlement.

“It’s an odd thing with shared memories being viewed like this. Because Lucius is a pivotal individual in both mine and Sol’s memories of this night, he appears as a figure you can follow.”

“I don’t know which one I want to follow,” Harry admitted.

“Would you like me to tell you which one I would recommend following?” Harry nodded. “I would follow Lucius. If I remember correctly, he saw pretty much everything.” Harry nodded again and Severus steered him to follow the blond. The memory began again around them.

“You have a very pretty name,” Lucius said to the tiny girl in his arms.

“I do?”

“Oh, yes. Very pretty. It’s a magical name. Do you know what it means?”

“No. Do you?”

“Yes, I do. Would you like to know?” She nodded as Lucius grabbed her bunny, stopping it from falling. “It’s Elvish. It means ‘One who is made of light that is pure’.” He paused. “Does bunny have a name?”

“Parsnip.”

“Ah. What a very excellent name for a bunny. Solarin, what did you mean, when you told Severus you remember? When he told you to be good?”

Harry marvelled at Lucius’ skill in the conversation.

“He meant my special tricks. I do things.”

“What kind of things?”

“Sevus says it’s magic. I make balls of light and make things float and change colours of things and other things. And I can peek.”

“Peek?”

“Inside. I can see what people are thinking. But Sevus told me not to do it here. He said I wouldn’t like what I saw.”

Lucius smiled at her and Harry could have sworn he could actually see the cogs in his head turning. It made him shudder, causing his Severus to lean in and kiss his temple.

They had reached an ajar door and Lucius pushed it open, setting Solarin down and taking her hand. Inside the room were Bellatrix and Fenrir, seated on a sofa playing cards, and others that Harry didn’t recognise.

Severus leaned in and whispered their names in Harry’s ear. “Those two by the bookshelves are the Lestrange brothers, that is Rabastan on the right and Rodolphus on the left. Rodolphus was Bella’s husband. The one by the fireplace is Claws, a disciple of Fenrir’s. He died some months after this, he displeased the Dark Lord in some way. I never knew what he actually did. The two at the table are Canis and Regulus, Sirius’ father and brother. The pale one by the window is Belladonna, Sirius’ mother. And the tanned young woman is Morganna Evernight. She was supposed to be Sirius’ wife, an arranged marriage. As you know, Sirius did not go through with it.”

Lucius led Solarin into the room and looked pointedly at Canis before leaving Solarin alone. The tiny witch made her way over to Bellatrix and let the woman pull her onto her lap.

Harry followed Lucius out of the room, moving along the corridors until they reached an anteroom, where the younger Severus was waiting nervously in a Death Eater robe, Dobby the House Elf putting the finishing touches to the ensemble.

“Are you ready?” Lucius asked.

“Yes,” the dark haired wizard replied, his voice surer than he looked.

The blond dismissed the elf and motioned to a door opposite the one he had entered through. “After you,” he said.

Harry understood it to be some kind of test. If Severus was afraid, if he didn’t go through the door, he would be allowed to leave. And Lucius would not stop him. But Severus did not hesitate. He walked forwards and confidently opened the door, stepping through it and leaving it open for Lucius.

There he was, seated at the head of a huge table. Voldemort. It surprised Harry how human he looked in this memory. Had he changed so much? True, he was still paler than anyone alive, and his eyes were blood red, but he had actually had a nose, and dark hair.

“He didn’t truly become demonic looking until later, until the Dark magic’s he invoked took their toll on him,” Severus whispered in his ear, sliding his arms around his waist to pull him into his hold. Harry suspected that it was more for Severus than himself.

“Ah, young Mr Snape. Welcome,” Voldemort said, a brief smile crossing his too pale lips. “Please, come in. We mustn’t linger in doorways, must we?”

“Of course not, my Lord,” Severus said, moving into the room fully, his eyes locked on the figure watching him. “It is an honour to be asked here tonight.”

“No, the honour is mine. From what Lucius has told me, you are quite the wizard.” He smiled and motioned to the table he was seated at. “Sit down, Severus.”

The young wizard took a seat; Harry saw his hand shake as he pulled out a chair for himself. His own Severus’ arms were shaking slightly and he laced their fingers.

“Now, Lucius tells me you would like to join my little family, that you have something to offer,” Voldemort said, holding up a goblet for Lucius himself to fill with wine. The blond then took the goblet from the pale hand and took a sip; he was obviously the test for poison. Harry shuddered at his own memories of a similar taste test and gripped the fingers he held tighter.

Severus waited until he had been given his own goblet and taken a sip to ease his dry throat before he answered.

“Yes, my Lord.”

“But I sense there may be something you wish from me, something only I can give. Only if I give this desired wish to you will I get what you have to offer. Am I correct, Severus?” Voldemort said with a small, knowing smile.

Harry’s blood boiled at the way Voldemort said his husbands name. He gripped the hands in his even more tightly, causing his own, older Severus to lean in and kiss his neck.

“You are correct. Truly you are an intelligent man, my Lord.”

“So, what is it you wish me to give you?”

“Protection for my sister.”

Voldemort tilted his head to one side, contemplating the younger Slytherin. “Is she a witch?”

“Yes.”

“And, yet, you feel she needs my protection?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

Severus paused, selecting his words carefully. “She is very young. I fear for her, that someone may try to use her.”

Harry already knew of this part, the negotiation of Solarin’s safety, so he tuned out, glancing around the room. If there had been a bed instead of a huge table, it could have been the room Harry was held prisoner in. It was dark and creepy, and sparse, very little ornamentation. There were no spying portraits, and Lucius was the only one in the room.

“No guards?” Harry questioned aloud.

“No. The Dark Lord saw no need when he was amongst his followers. He trusted that they were too afraid to harm him themselves, and too loyal to allow anyone else to harm him,” Severus murmured in his ear.

“I grow tired of your word games, Snape!” Voldemort yelled, rising to his feet, drawing Harry’s attention back to the memory.

Younger Severus got to his feet also, rounding the table to lean into the man.

“You wish to hear my wishes in plain English? Very well,” he said softly. “Solarin is an augur. She is very special. I swear not to let anyone on the ‘Light’ side use her, if you promise me no one on your side will use her either. She will be immune, completely neutral, until she comes of age and is old enough to make her own choices.”

“And, in return for the child’s safety? What will you give me to ensure her neutrality? Why should I give you this?”

“In return, I will give you me.”

“You?”

“Yes, me. In any capacity you wish. Potions Master, healer, spy…anything.”

“Anything?” Voldemort mused to himself. “Absolutely anything?”

“Anything you want. If you wish for…me to…be a release of sorts, so to speak, you will get it. But Solarin MUST remain untouched by you and all of your followers. If so much as a hair on her head is put out of place by anyone on your side of the war, I will withdraw everything and hand her over to Dumbledore and the Order.”

The Dark Lord peered at Severus for a while, thinking over his offer. “Lucius, leave us.” The blond left and Harry could almost see the waves of fear radiating off of the younger Severus. “I assume you are traditionally dressed?”

“Yes. The traditional robe…bare underneath.”

“Disrobe,” he commanded. He saw the younger man begin to protest. “I wish to see the merchandise before I buy, so to speak. Disrobe.”

Severus reached up with clammy fingers to unbutton his robe, letting his arms fall and shrugging out of it, the black silk falling to pool on the floor. He held perfectly still as Voldemort came closer, reaching out to run a fingertip over the pale skin of his abdomen. He circled Severus, looking him over, touching pieces of skin here and there. He paused when they were face to face, his pale spider-like hand sliding down to clutch a buttock. His other hand reached down the front, cupping Severus.

“Does my touch bother you?” he asked and Severus shook his head, obviously not trusting himself to speak. “You’re a very good liar, Severus. Many would not be so convincing with their eyes. I know my hands are cold.” He began to stroke Severus, his lips twitching as Severus began to grow into his hand at the stimulation. “Tell me, Severus, have you ever been with another man?”

“Y-yes.”

“Who?”

Severus gasped as Voldemort tightened his grip, his fingers sliding between his cheeks to force their way into him when Severus wasn’t fast enough with his answers. His hips thrust forwards involuntarily at the intrusion.

“Lucius, my Lord. It was Lucius,” he ground out.

Voldemort removed his hands and motioned for Severus to dress once more. He regained his seat and waited for Severus to sit in the seat next to him before he spoke again.

“Here are my conditions,” he said, reaching out to stroke Severus’ hair. “You will be my personal Potions Master, my healer, to the best of your abilities, spy, if the occasion should call for it, and my consort, to put it politely. To be crude, you will be mine, Severus, for my eyes and my pleasure alone. I do mean it when I say you will spread your legs for no one but me, and you will spread for me whenever I desire it. You will take what I give you and keep that pretty mouth shut.”

“And, in return?”

“Solarin will be immune until she comes of age. No one from my side of the war, myself included, will touch her. She will be neutral, for you to raise how you see fit.”

Severus began to nod but stopped when Voldemort continued. 

“Of course, I will need to meet the little one, see what it is you enslave yourself for.”

“No! I mean…she is too young. She will not understand you, my Lord. She can be very stubborn.”

“I am not asking, Severus. Lucius?” The blond poked his head around the door. “Bring the little Snape to me. Immediately.”

Harry took his Severus by the hand and pulled him after Lucius. “How do I stop it…take a break?” he questioned. Severus pulled him out of the room to the main door and the memory paused around them

“Are you all right?” Severus whispered. “You don’t have to watch this if you cannot take anymore. I won’t be upset if you choose not to watch.”

Harry pulled him in and latched his lips to his, kissing his older husband with as much passion as he could, putting everything he had into the kiss. Severus could do nothing but let Harry take control, let him do what he wanted. It was rare that Harry took such control over anything in their relationship. He was usually the one who sat back and let Severus lead, content to someone else handle all the responsibility. But now…well, Severus had no choice but to surrender to the will of his husband.

Eventually, Harry calmed somewhat, the kiss becoming less wild and frantic. He pulled back, nipping at Severus’ kiss-swollen lower lip, stealing little tender kisses.

“I’m sorry to jump you, but I just had to do that,” Harry said when he finally came up for air.

Severus chuckled dazedly. “Don’t apologise. I have no idea what caused that but I enjoyed it immensely. Feel free to jump me any time you like.”

“I didn’t like seeing him touch you.”

“Is that what caused this? Him touching me?”

“You are mine, my Severus. I just couldn’t help it. I saw him touch you and it was like my insides were on fire.”

Severus swooped in and stole a swift kiss. “I understand, love.”

“Does he touch you again? Because I don’t want to see it.”

“Then I think it would be best if we followed Sol from now on, saw her side of the memories.”

“What did he do to you after he saw Solarin?”

Severus took a deep breath. “He made sure I knew what he wanted from me,” he said delicately.

“I don’t want to see anymore after he meets Sol,” Harry said firmly. “I don’t want to even think about him touching you.”

Severus nodded, motioning for Harry to follow Lucius back down the same hallway. As they approached the door, they could hear shouting. Lucius opened the door to reveal Canis standing between Solarin and Bellatrix, apparently trying to protect one from the other.

“What, in the name of Merlin, is going on in here?” he questioned, his tone low and dangerous, and Solarin took a running leap at him, bounding into his arms and scowling at Bellatrix while cuddling Parsnip the Bunny. Harry found the mini-Snape scowl adorable. It hadn’t been that adorable from Severus in Potions class.

“She pulled my hair,” Solarin complained.

“The little brat hexed me across the room!” Bellatrix snarled.

Lucius sighed, looking between the two witches, the younger obviously the more powerful of the two, and then looked to Canis for an explanation. 

“Bella got the idea that the little one needed her hair played with. Solarin tried to tell Bella to leave her alone, which was ignored, so she just…sort of…well, it was really a hex across the room, but Bella had fair warning,” Canis said.

“So, Bellatrix started it and Solarin finished it. Why am I not surprised,” Lucius said without question. He passed Solarin to Canis and grabbed Bellatrix by the arm, yanking her out into the hall.

“It wasn’t my fault!” she protested.

“I don’t care!” he snarled. “I do not give Merlin’s right bollock who started it or who is to blame! If you fuck this up, we will lose Severus for our cause. And it will be all of our necks on the line. He wants Severus, he wants Severus willing! I told you not to upset the little one, I told you how important this was, and yet you still annoy her!”

“So I’m not even allowed to retaliate?”

“Not until the child comes of age, and then you can do whatever you want to her. But not a moment before.”

Bellatrix huffed for a moment before nodding, regaining her seat and watching as Lucius took the tiny girl with him as he left.

“That’s why Bellatrix wants Sol as a plaything, isn’t it?” Harry questioned. 

“Yes. Bella never was one to let things go. She sees this event as something Solarin still needs to be punished for. In her mind, she did nothing wrong,” Severus explained as they followed the blond and brunette.

“That sounds really petty.”

“It is, but that’s Bellatrix for you. Thank heavens she never reproduced.”

They followed Lucius back into the room with Voldemort and fell silent as they watched once more.

Solarin reached for Severus, the older Snape taking her from Lucius and letting her cuddle close.

“Don’t like,” she mumbled, snuggling into his neck.

“I know, sweetheart, I know,” Severus murmured. “We’ll go home soon, I promise, just a little longer.”

“Don’t like Twix,” she said.

Severus turned a questioning eye on Lucius. “Why doesn’t she like Bellatrix?”

“Slight misunderstanding. No one got hurt…well, maybe Bella ended up with a few bruises. She’s quite the little witch, isn’t she?” Lucius said.

Severus nodded and looked up at Voldemort. “My Lord, this is Solarin.”

Voldemort held out his hands and waited as Severus weighed up the options, before the younger man whispered in Solarin’s ear not to peak and handing her over. The Dark Lord sat her upon the table facing him, Severus in clear view of the child, and smiled at her.

“Hello,” he said. “My name is Lord Voldemort.”

“That’s a big name. Do you have a little one?” she asked after trying to say it for a few moments and failing.

“You can call me Sal.”

“Sal…” She tilted her head to the side and contemplated the substitute she had been offered. “I like it. Are you Lucas’ friend?” she questioned, completely mangling the aristocrats name.

“Yes, Lucius and I are very good friends. I hope you and Severus will be my friends also,” he said, seemingly amused by her. “That is a very pretty dress you’re wearing.”

“Sevus said you like green.”

“Yes, I do. Green is my favourite. What’s yours?”

“I like blue.”

“Severus is a very nice man. I like him very much.”

“Me too. I love Sevus. He takes care of me.”

“Ah, is that so?”

“Yup. Mummy went to heaven with the angels and daddy went to grown up time out ‘cause he hurt mummy.”

“That’s not very nice.”

“Daddy didn’t like magic. Sevus says it was ‘cause he couldn’t do it.”

“Severus sounds like a very clever man. You know, your Severus has told me about you. He’s told me that you’re a very special little girl, that you can do special things.”

She nodded, her eyes focused on a bow on Parsnip’s dress that had come undone. She held it out to Voldemort, her child’s innocence fully expecting him to fix it. He looked to Severus, apparently unknowing of what he was supposed to do. Severus came forwards and fastened the bow, smiling down at Solarin.

“Solarin, can you show me some of your tricks, some of the special things you do?” Voldemort questioned and Solarin shook her head.

“Sevus said not to.”

“Solarin, I would very much like to see how special you are,” he pressed, and Harry could almost see her boil in anger at being argued with.

Severus stepped in, scooping her up and settling her on his hip as he walked around the room with her, smoothing her ruffled feathers.

“But you told me!” she argued.

“I know, sweetheart, I know what I told you. But now I’m telling you something else. I need you to do this for me. Please?”

She went silent, leaning her head on his shoulder and reaching up to twiddle her little fingers in his hair, the other arm firmly fastened around her toy. 

“They have magic?”

“Yes, everyone here has magic, no one will get angry at you. Everyone here can do special things, they all like magic. I’m sure Lucius would play your games with you, if you asked him to.”

“But no peaking?”

“No, no peaking, that’s right.”

She sighed and snuggled a little closer before she nodded and Severus set her on her own feet. She passed her bunny to Severus and made her way over to Lucius, who knelt down to be closer to her level. Voldemort watched with rapt fascination as she asked the blond if he liked playing catch.

She walked a little way away from the kneeling man and conjured a bright green ball of light the size of a basket ball. She threw it to Lucius, who caught it and stared in wonder at it.

“You can’t keep it,” she said. “It goes away.”

“She means it doesn’t last, the magic in it dissipates. In a few hours it will vanish,” Severus said.

“It’s amazing,” Lucius breathed. He tore his eyes away from it to look at Solarin. “What else can you do?”

She looked up at Severus before she grinned and turned Lucius’ luxuriant blond hair a fetching shade of pastel pink. Severus cringed.

“Can you change it back, little one?” Voldemort asked.

“No. But it looks pretty this way. Do you like Hide and Seek?” He nodded and she grinned.

With a sound akin to a gum bubble popping, she vanished, only to reappear behind Severus, peeking around his knees to grin at the other two men. Something flashed in Voldemort’s eyes but it was Lucius who spoke.

“How did she do that?” he demanded of Severus. “There are wards all over my property. No Apperation. How did she do it?”

“Solarin confuses the most sophisticated of wards. There is no spell that can guarantee against her abilities,” Severus said firmly. “There is nothing wrong with the wards, it is just the way she is.”

“Gentlemen,” Voldemort interrupted. “I think I have seen more than I need to. Lucius, you will take the little one back to Canis. Severus, you will remain with me.”

Severus picked Solarin up and handed her to Lucius. Harry made to follow the blond but his own Severus held him in place. 

“You should hear what he said to me, love,” Severus said. “I promise, you won’t have to watch him touch me again, but you should see this next bit.”

“Why?” Harry questioned.

“Because it may help you to understand just how afraid of Solarin he was, why he gave her immunity.”

Harry hesitated but eventually nodded, watching as Voldemort surveyed the younger Severus through guarded eyes.

“Well, well, Severus, she is an impressive little witch isn’t she?” he murmured, more to himself than to Severus. “She could be very dangerous in the wrong hands.”

“You see my predicament, my Lord.” He waved a long pale hand for Severus to continue. “I want her to be a little girl before being a weapon. I want her to be a child before anything else. She needs that, space and time to find her own way, to discover who she is and how she wants to live, how she thinks her abilities should be used. They are hers, after all, and I feel she should at least be given the time to figure them out before she has to rely on them. I want her to know WHO she is, before someone tries to mould her into who they think she should be. I know you can give her that, you can give her those freedoms, while still allowing her to be protected in the way she needs to be.”

Voldemort was silent for a long time before he replied. “You can swear to me that Dumbledore will not attempt to influence her?”

“He fears her as much as you, though he claims otherwise. I can see it…the way he looks at her. Everyone fears her. It is easier for them, I think, to pretend her extra abilities do not exist, to pretend she is nothing more than a simple child. No one has any recollection of an augur like her.”

“Indeed. Usually augur’s are born to Pureblood families, parents that understand the start in life a child such as she requires. Families that understand magic and the problems that can come with it. But Solarin…she is volatile, Severus, startlingly so. I fear she will only become more uncontrolled as she grows. Why did you not remove her from the grips of that filthy Mudblood before? Why did you allow this to continue?”

“I had no choice. My mother would not leave him,” Severus replied.

Severus leaned into Harry and guided him to the door. “It is time to leave this room, love. You don’t want to see what comes next.”

Severus led him through the hallways, following the path Lucius must have taken, until they were back in the sitting room. They watched as Solarin sat on Canis’ lap, chattering away to him as she drew picture after picture, stopping every now and then to slurp on the bowl of ice cream Lucius had summoned for her. After a while, though to Harry it seemed like forever, Solarin grew bored of her artwork and turned to Lucius, playing ‘catch’ with him once more.

And then the scene was something terrifying. Solarin screamed, her magic exploding and throwing all the inhabitants of the room to the edges of it. She lay in the centre of the room, on the plush carpet, cradling her left arm to her body and sobbing for all she was worth. Sirius’ mother (Belladonna, Harry remembered) was the first to regain herself, cradling the child close. But Solarin began to scream in anger at being held by the woman.

Canis was the first to understand. He made his way over to his wife and scooped the child out of her arms, holding her close and leaning in to speak directly into her ear.

“I know you want Severus, but he cannot come right now. You’ll have to make do with one of us until he comes,” he said, softly but with no room for argument.

She glared up at him for a moment before nodding and curling into his chest, sobbing in pain. He murmured soothing nonsense as he settled himself in one of the armchairs. He didn’t try to get Solarin to show him her arm, he just held her and waited.

Soon enough, there was a gentle tap at the door and Lucius opened it to reveal a pale, shaky looking Severus. Lucius raised an eyebrow and Severus nodded. Harry couldn’t help but notice that his robes were buttoned up wrong, and there was blood trickling down his ankle to pool on the floor beneath his boot, which was only loosely laced.

“We know,” the blond said, motioning to the little Snape.

Severus seemed to banish his own pain as he strode across the room, plucking her up and holding her close. She clung to him, curling her tiny fingers in his hair and sobbing about the pain. He eventually managed to calm her somewhat and carefully eased her arm away from her body, rolling up her sleeve to look at the angry red skin. And, right in the middle of her tiny forearm, there was Dark Mark, identical to Severus’ own.

“How?” Regulus questioned.

“It’s an echo of mine,” Severus said. “I’m her only carer, there’s a connection.” He looked to the blond. “Lucius, we should go. I need to dress her arm and try and get her to bed.”

“Of course.” 

Severus bid farewell to the other inhabitants of the room before following Lucius out, through the hallways, to the front door.

“Good evening, Severus,” Voldemort said as Lucius opened the door.

The pale man came forwards and…Harry saw nothing more, as his Severus put his hands over his eyes, preventing him from seeing. Only when Severus had made it through the front door did the older version remove his hands.

“Did he-” Lucius began.

“Do not mention that in front of my sister,” Severus interrupted. “I don’t want her to know.”

Lucius chuckled. “After that farewell? She could hardly have missed it, Severus.”

Severus rounded on the man, his eyes full of fire and…what was that? It took a moment for Harry to realise that he was seeing shame.

“She is four years old!” the dark man hissed. “Do NOT mention anything he does to me in front of her, or I WILL make you suffer for it, I swear it.”

Lucius nodded silently.

“All she needs to know is that I do this, I protect her like this, because I love her…more than my own life.”

“Of that, I have no doubt,” Lucius murmured.

Harry closed his eyes as the memory swirled around him, making him a little nauseous. He opened them to find he was in the tiny cottage from the last memory Severus had shown him.

Severus wearily made his way to the door, leaving Solarin curled up on the sofa cradling her sore arm. Potions had done nothing to ease her pain and now she just sat there, staring out at the room in silence. He suspected she was just ignoring him on purpose now.

Harry noticed that the younger version of his husband had damp hair and scrubbed red raw skin, and he was dressed in a faded looking pair of pyjamas.

“Albus! What…I mean, why…it’s unexpected to see you so late,” Severus spluttered.

“I felt the need for a visit. You left dinner so suddenly. I worried that perhaps something had happened with young Solarin, that perhaps her illness was something serious,” Albus said. “May I come in?”

Severus grimaced. “Now really is not the best time.”

“I really must insist.”

Severus knew that he would never beat Albus in a battle. There was no point in trying to keep him out if he really wanted to come in. So he sighed, hanging his head as he stepped back. He held his breath as Albus caught sight of Solarin’s arm, of the bandage on his own making a bulge under his sleeve.

“Sweet Merlin,” Albus gasped. “Severus…what have you done?”

And then Harry was in his own room, sitting on his bed, watching Severus pull the memory back into its bottle. He corked it and placed it and the Pensieve on the chest of drawers. The older wizard hesitated, looking at his husband.

“I can go and sleep in one of the spare rooms…if you don’t want me touching you right now,” he murmured and Harry snorted.

Before Severus knew what had happened, Harry had him shirtless and pinned to the bed, kissing him senseless as his delicate fingers slid across his chest, teasing nipples.

“If you think, for a single moment, that I ever want you to sleep somewhere other than right here, with me, in our bed, then you’ve lost your mind,” Harry said. “Percy was wrong. He doesn’t know you at all. You do what you have to, to protect the ones you love. What you did to protect Sol, what you put yourself through to keep her safe…I can’t even find words for how amazing I think you are. And I love you, no matter what.”

Severus let out a sigh of relief and made to speak but Harry’s hand shot out and covered his mouth.

“I’m not done. This bit I’m only ever going to say once, and woe betide you if you dare to forget it.” He paused for effect. “If I ever find out you let anyone but me touch you the way I do, I will hex your balls off. I know you have a past, I understand and accept that, I can’t change it. What happened then was then. But if I find out you let anyone but me touch you that way now, you will be in immense amounts of pain. Am I clear?”

“Crystal,” Severus said.

“Good. Now…show me how much you love me, Mr Snape.”

Severus grinned and leaned up to kiss him, wandlessly and wordlessly vanishing all of their clothes, leaving them naked and needy, flipping them so he was on top.

Harry moaned as Severus kissed his way down his body, tasting and nipping at responsive flesh until he reached Harry’s toes, at which he paused to lick and suck. He made his way up the inside of Harry’s leg, taking his time on the delicate flesh on the inside of his thighs. Harry reached down, tangling his fingers in Severus’ hair as he began to lap at his balls. He shifted restlessly. He was too close for Severus to play with him like this.

“Severus, stop,” Harry said, causing the older man’s head to shoot up. He immediately crawled up to lay beside Harry, pulling him into his arms.

“What is it? Harry, are you all right?” he questioned, his eyes searching the bright green ones for any sign of panic.

Harry smiled and leaned in, kissing him deep, his fingers stealing into Severus’ hair as his thigh came up to rest on his hip. Severus surrendered to it, letting his body take over, his mind going completely blank for the first time in his life. Everything that had ever happened, all the things he had ever called someone or been called, all the violence and pain, it all just drifted away. All he was aware of were soft hands on his skin, warm skin under his own, the pounding of his heart and the burn of oncoming release.

Some dim part of his mind told him he was being too rough with Harry, that he had never truly taken control of him this way, but he just couldn’t stop. The incredible sensation of Harry surrounding him, that tight welcoming heat enveloping his straining member, it was just too much. He felt every cell in his body strain forwards, his entire consciousness condensing down to the rush and burn of his ejaculation into Harry’s climaxing body.

Severus regained himself to find that he was sprawled across Harry, his ear pressed against Harry’s beating heart, the younger man stroking his hair and laying kisses on the top of his head, his graceful fingers trailing over his sweaty back.

His head shot up and he tried to roll off his lover, only to be met with a groan of protest and a tightening of the arms and legs wrapped around him.

“Don’t even think about it,” Harry said, his voice a little hoarse. “Don’t you dare move. Stay right where you are.”

Severus coughed to clear his throat. “Am I not crushing you?”

“No. I like it.”

Severus was silent for a while, contemplating whether or not he really wanted to ask his next question. ‘Come on, you idiot, what are you? Man or mouse?!’ He took a deep breath and looked up into Harry’s eyes.

“Did I hurt you?” he whispered.

Harry burst into peals of laughter. “No! Why? Did you zone out?”

Severus felt himself blush.

“Severus, you didn’t hurt me. I’m not made of glass, you know, I won’t break if you’re a little rougher than usual. In fact, I enjoyed it. Okay, so it was different than our usual, but different isn’t always bad.”

“You really enjoyed it?” Severus asked, leaning down to kiss a lovebite on Harry’s throat, noticing a trail of them all down his chest and along his shoulders, one even lingering just underneath his ear.

“Mmmmhmmmm,” Harry hummed, sliding his hand down to caress Severus’ firm arse. “It was very…I don’t know…help me, I can’t think of the word.”

“Wild? Unrestrained? Surprising?”

“All of the above,” Harry said with a wide smile, a slight blush staining his pale cheeks. He leaned in to capture Severus’ lips once more, his pelvis tilting towards Severus.

“Oh, again?” Severus hummed, stroking one of Harry’s smooth thighs as he felt himself harden once more.

“I just can’t get enough of my gorgeous Slytherin husband.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Albus Dumbledore was rarely surprised. It took quite a lot to really shock him. And, even he would admit, it was usually Harry Potter and his mishmash of ‘family’ that were the ones to get him.

So, when the formerly ‘dead’ Lord Canis Black turned up at Hogwarts’ front gate one Wednesday morning just after breakfast, Albus was practically shocked out of his skin.

“Canis,” Albus said as he watched Minerva show the man into his office. “How…unexpected to see you.”

“Yes, well, I hadn’t exactly planned on it,” Canis said as he took the offered seat and accepted a cup of tea. “But I received a letter from my son.”

“Ah, yes. I did hear something about that. So…what is your plan of action?”

“I’m afraid I don’t quite follow you.”

“Is there a letter you wish me to pass along?”

“Well…I was actually hoping to see him,” Canis said, hope evident in his voice.

Albus sighed. “That could be difficult.”

“I know that Sirius and I…we don’t have the best past. But he is my son, and I would like the chance to talk to him…face to face.” He paused. “Please, Albus.”

The old wizard peered at the man. The years had taken their toll on him. He was no longer as striking as he once had been. He remembered Canis as being arrogant and dismissive, caring nothing for the feelings and opinions of others. But now he was smaller, more humble. And Albus reckoned he could see real remorse in his blue eyes.

“I will talk to him,” Albus said eventually. “But you must understand, there may be the real chance that he is not ready to see you. And there is the highly likely chance that Remus may object, refuse to let you near his mate.”

“He’s still with Remus?” Canis asked.

“Yes, they are still together. Surely even you know that true werewolf mates mate for life?”

“Yes, I know. I was just wondering if he was happy with Remus, if they’re still that much in love.”

Albus allowed himself a small indulgent smile. “Their love knows no limits. And yes, he is happy with Remus. He is happy most days. Not all day every day, but most of the time he is happy. It is very satisfying to see him so content with his lot.” He paused. “Wait here. I will go and talk to him, feel out the situation. I do not guarantee anything. But I will try for you.”

“Thank you, Albus,” Canis said but the headmaster held up his hand as he moved to the fireplace.

“Do not thank me, Canis. I have done nothing.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Canis entered the small French restaurant ten minutes earlier than he was expected. It was his entire aim to show that he could do this, he could be what his son needed him to be.

“Bonjour,” said the host, a refined looking man of about fifty. “Do you ‘ave a reservation?”

“Ah, yes. I don’t know what name it was put under.”

“Who made it?”

“Albus Dumbledore.”

“Ah, but of course. You are not Monsieur Sirius, so you must be Monsieur Canis.” He motioned to one of the impeccably dressed attendants. “Henry will be your maître d‘, he will show you to your table. May I take your coat?”

Canis handed over his long black wool coat and followed the younger man to the table in the window. He accepted an ice water while he waited, and settled in, trying to work out what on earth he was going to say.

And, while Canis was sipping on his water, Sirius was nervously entering the bistro alone. He could practically feel Remus’ eyes boring into his back. His mate was watching from the window of Fred and George’s shop, just across from the restaurant. Remus had agreed to this, on the one condition that he got to watch the entire thing from across Diagon Alley.

“Ah, Monsieur Sirius!”

He smiled at the enthusiastic welcome by the host. He and Remus were regulars at this particular establishment. He had chosen this place for two reasons: because he knew that he would enjoy the food if not the conversation, and Remus could watch him. He handed over his leather jacket and let Henry the waiter lead him over to the specified table. He took a deep breath before looking at his father.

He looked older than Sirius had expected, but he supposed his father could say the same for him. His once black hair had prominent streaks of grey and there were deep wrinkles on his once smooth face. Time had not been kind.

“Father,” he said quietly, taking the offered hand and shaking it before taking his seat. He ordered a glass of red wine before beginning the conversation.

“You got my letter, then?”

“Yes, I got it. Quite the surprise, I’ll admit, but I was glad of it. Beautiful owl.”

“Yes, her name is Hedwig. She’s a good girl.”

There was silence as Henry arrived with the glass of wine and two menu’s, reeling off the days specials, before disappearing to let them decide.

“Very nice weather today,” Canis said, motioning to the clear blue of the sky. “I haven’t been to London for a while, I’d forgotten what the weather could be like.”

“Yes, one of the nicer London days. One of the first for ages.” He paused, taking a sip of his wine. “Where have you been?”

“New Zealand. I emigrated there just after you went to Azkaban.”

“And just gave up everything?”

Canis looked up into the questioning blue eyes. They had always been the same, even when Sirius had been a little boy. Always probing for answers, always wanting to know more. No wonder he had become a Gryffindor; Sirius had more courage than most.

“That’s a long story,” the older wizard said eventually.

“We have time.”

Canis allowed himself a slight smile. “Before I begin…how did you figure me out? That I wasn’t really dead?”

“The Ministry Hall Of Records. My…well, she’s sort of my daughter-in-law…kind of. Anyway, she was doing some research on Lucius and she came across the Black family records. They were all mixed up, because of Narcissa marrying him. She noticed that there was no date of death for you. Mind you, I don’t know how she has the patience to look up anything in that place, it’s just one gigantic pile of parchment.”

“I knew I should have snapped my wand,” Canis murmured. “Once a wand is snapped, the witch or wizard is no longer on the Records.”

Sirius nodded and they paused long enough to order before Sirius found his confidence again.

“So…why did you leave me everything?”

“Because I felt you could do better with it than I could.” He sighed. “Hindsight is a wonderful thing. I can look back and say that all the things I did wrong were things I should have done differently. But, at the time, I felt I was doing the right thing. Am I making any sense?” Sirius nodded so he continued. “I handled everything badly, Sirius. You in particular. I was caught between the father you needed me to be, and the father I was expected to be by everyone else.” He smiled a little. “You were always such an independent little thing. Always knew your own mind. Not like me. You were right. I was always following someone else, doing what someone else thought I should.”

“Father…”

“No, let me finish,” Canis said. “Sirius, I have always been proud of you. I may not have shown it, but I have always been prouder of you than I could ever say. You made your own way, stuck by your own choices. And I was proud of those choices. You made your own life, just the way you wanted. And…I suppose I was a little jealous.”

“Jealous?”

“Of what you had with Remus,” he admitted. “You must have known that I never loved your mother. I didn’t even like her most of the time!”

“I did have my suspicions,” Sirius said with a wry smile as their starters arrived. 

“The truth of the matter is that I had another. I wasn’t as lucky as you. She didn’t love me back, so I went through with my arranged marriage. It was one of the biggest mistakes of my life.”

“So…you understood why I couldn’t marry Morganna?”

“Yes, I understood. I handled it badly, and for that I am very sorry. And…I’m sorry…for what I said.”

“Which bit?”

“The bit where I said things about Remus. I shouldn’t have. I didn’t know him. I took my knowledge of Fenrir Greyback and just assumed. I’m sorry, Sirius. I never should have said those things about Remus, and you had every right to hit me.” 

Sirius didn’t know what to say, so he just nodded. He wondered how long his father had been practicing that speech.

They were silent for a while, each lost in their own thoughts. They had finished their starters and started their mains before either of them spoke again.

“Why did you decide to contact me?” Sirius said eventually. “Was it my letter?”

“It was,” Canis admitted. “It came as quite a shock. I had been thinking about contacting you. But there was a picture of you and Remus in The Prophet. You looked so happy, I feared I would ruin it.”

“I understand.”

Canis smiled as Sirius began to relax a little. “So…tell me of your life. Albus said you were happy.”

“I am. Remus and I are very happy.”

“I’m glad. I would like to know…if you want to tell me. Is it just the two of you or did you have children?”

“We have two children, a boy and a girl, both seventeen. And a granddaughter, she’s almost eight months. Then there is the extended family. It gets a little complicated after that. It’s all marriages, adoptions, in-laws, and ones who’ve become family simply by association, or osmosis.”

“Sounds complicated,” Canis chuckled.

“It is, but we manage to keep track. Just.”

They chatted for a while, Sirius getting more animated with every moment, describing how much he loved it when Nixie called him Daddy, or when Remus stroked his hair, or when Harry made fun of him over the breakfast table.

“And Remus…well, I can’t begin to tell you how much I love him,” Sirius said, taking a bite of his chocolate fudge cake.

“I am a little surprised,” Canis admitted between bites of his own profiteroles.

“By what? What I’m still with him, that you weren’t right?” Sirius accused, immediately defensive of his mate.

“No! No, I didn’t mean that,” Canis assured. “I meant…I was surprised he let this lunch happen. That is all I meant, Sirius, I swear it. I felt for sure that he wouldn’t let me anywhere near you…after all, he would have every right…after all I did.”

Sirius felt himself blush. “Oh. Sorry. I shouldn’t have jumped down your throat like that.”

“It’s all right, quite all right. I should have been clearer.”

Sirius smiled a little. “You’re right, though. It was a little touch and go as to whether Remus would actually let me leave the house.”

“I’m glad he did.”

“He’s…ummm…well, Remus is actually watching us,” Sirius admitted embarrassedly.

Canis smiled and choked down his laughter. “Where is he?”

“In the joke shop across the alley.”

“I see.” Canis took a deep breath and summoned whatever he had in place of courage. “I would like to meet him.”

“Really?”

“Yes. I never really did, and he is married to my son. I never gave him a fair chance and I should have. Maybe he and I should have at least one conversation.”

“Maybe. Not today though,” Sirius reasoned. “Let’s not rush him.”

“Good point.”

The two of them went on to order more drinks and more things to nibble on while they chatted, and eventually left the restaurant as the sun began to set, both of them feeling lighter than they had when they arrived.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Severus was deep in the throes of planning the day trip to the zoo in Wales when the article appeared in the morning edition of The Daily Prophet.

As soon as Remus pointed it out to him, he knew Harry would take it badly. But, he also knew that he would be a fool if he thought he could hide it from his lover. He added the final ingredients needed to the potion he was working on and made his way from the room in search of his petite husband.

It had been a quiet few weeks, all things considered. They were just entering February. Harry had regained his temper, so long as he and Percy were never left alone in the same room; Nixie had finally managed to get a rudimentary grip on the things she needed to know for her Defence N.E.W.T. ; Solarin had begun to talk again and even, on one or two occasions, actually smile.

The letters from Lucius still continued, they were now more of an annoyance than a threat. He had made a few appearances, one of which was caught on camera, proving to the wizarding world that he was indeed campaigning for the office of Dark Lord, as he was killing a family of muggles, execution style.

Severus considered planning the trip to the zoo something akin to planning a military operation. It wasn’t just going to Diagon Alley for a few hours. This was planning transport; sorting out financing for the tickets to get in; listing who would and wouldn’t be coming; making sure Mad-Eye and Tonks (and possibly Kingsley or another Auror) were free on that particular day; supplies for at least one infant, possibly three, and one toddler, which included a change of clothes for each child involved; where and when they were going to eat on the day. The list was seemingly endless but Severus knew it would all be worth it in the end. He had scheduled the trip for the Easter break in April so most of the family could come if they so wished and, so far, he had almost everyone down to go.

Severus eventually found Harry in the library, sitting at the table working on a Transfiguration essay while Miri wriggled about on the floor with a squishy cloth book which she was sucking to death. Harry threw down his quill and rubbed his eyes when he realised Severus and Remus were watching him.

The Potions Master entered and placed a gentle kiss on Harry’s seeking lips.

“Mmmmm, that kiss makes the whole essay torture seem much nicer,” Harry said with a smile as Severus took a seat at the table with him.

“Indeed. Finished?” Harry nodded and Severus gifted him another kiss. “I’ll check it for spelling for you later. Harry, would it be all right if Remus took Miri for a little bit? We need to have a little chat.”

“I’m not going to like this chat, am I?”

“No, I’m fairly sure you won’t like it.”

“Then yes, Remus can take Miri for a while.” The teen smiled at his adoptive father as he picked up the baby. He gave Miri a kiss goodbye and waited until he heard Remus’ footsteps fading before he looked his husband straight in the eye. “Okay, just tell me. Is someone dead?”

“No.”

“Then tell me fast…you know, like ripping off a plaster? Like that.”

Severus pulled the paper from where he had it laying on his lap and opened it out. He didn’t have to point out the article, it was front page.

HARRY POTTER: BAD PARENTING?

BY RITA SKEETER

“I can’t believe the Prophet gave her her job back,” Harry muttered as he shoved it away without reading it and looked up at his husband. “So…what does she say about me this time?”

“Not going to read it?” Severus questioned as he folded the paper again.

“No. I got tired of reading the Prophet’s lies a long time ago. But I’m guessing you’ve read it, so I want you to give me a summary.”

Severus smiled and leaned in for a kiss before beginning to recount what the article had said.

“Well, apparently you do nothing for Miri, your parents and I do everything…you foist Miri off on everyone and anyone who will have her…you feed her junk day and night…you ignore her cries…the list is endless, love.”

“Did Skeeter get anything right?” Harry asked after a long pause.

“Your name?” Severus said uncertainly. “I think that’s all she got right. She doesn’t mention Miri by name, legally she can’t.”

Harry was silent for a long while and Severus let him be. It was something Harry should have been used to by now, being in the public eye, but Severus knew it still bothered him. Harry was an incredibly private person, and Severus couldn’t honestly say he blamed him. It was called a private life for a reason, and Harry had as much right to have one as the next wizard.

“Do you know Luna’s father?” Harry asked eventually.

“Xenophillius Lovegood? Yes, I do. Not well, but I am on relatively good terms with him. Nice man, if more than a little eccentric. Why do you ask?”

Harry seemed to be mulling over whatever was in his head. “I was wondering…what if I gave an interview?”

“An interview? Why on earth would you…oh! I see,” Severus said. “You want to give an interview to get your point across, to have your say.”

“Exactly. Mr Lovegood published my last interview, and he was honest and truthful then. He printed my words exactly as I wanted them, no lies to sell copies. Even if it was Rita doing the interview last time, it still got published the way I wanted it to. I was thinking…maybe he could come here and do an interview…and maybe a couple of pictures. Maybe then everyone will calm down about wanting to see ‘Harry Potter’s baby’,” Harry said calmly, using air quotes.

Severus held out his hand and pulled Harry onto his lap, capturing his lips in a scorching kiss which Harry happily reciprocated.

“Tell me, love…just how long have you had this idea in your head?”

Harry smiled. “Since before Miri was born. Around the time I decided to keep her.”

Severus felt his eyebrows shoot upwards.

“See, I knew everyone would want a piece of Miri. Everyone would want a picture or the inside scoop. So, it kind of occurred to me that, if I did an interview and I called the shots, then Miri would be kind of protected.”

“It’s a good idea…different, but in the good way,” Severus said. “I believe the Muggle Royals have a similar system. Prince’s William and Harry only give official interviews to one or two reporters. All the rest have to rely on second hand news.”

“So I could, theoretically, put Rita Skeeter out of business if I only gave interviews to one reporter, which would be Mr Lovegood at The Quibbler?”

Severus chuckled. “Theoretically, yes. People would grow tired of Rita if they knew you only gave interviews to one source, only allowed one magazine pictures of your baby-”

“Our baby,” Harry interrupted.

“Our baby, yes,” Severus agreed with a smile. “But I am not the one who has Rita Skeeter chomping at the bit. The Wizarding world only cares that Miri is ‘Harry Potter’s Baby’, not that she is mine.”

“I care.”

Severus couldn’t help it. He leaned in and captured Harry’s lips with his own, wrapping his arms around his torso and sliding a hand down to grope Harry’s backside. He showed Harry just how much it meant to him that Harry felt that way.

“Satisfied?” Harry giggled when Severus finally let him up for air.

“Immensely,” Severus said. “Where were we?”

“Interview.”

“Ah, yes. I could send Mr Lovegood a letter, asking if he would be willing.”

“And Colin Creevy.”

“Why him?”

“He likes taking pictures of me, and his pictures are pretty good. I think the pictures for the magazine will come out better if he takes them.”

“I’ll talk to Albus. Now, when were you thinking of doing this interview?”

“Before the zoo trip. Sometime soon, get it out of the way and calm down the heaving masses.”

“Next weekend?”

“Sounds good.” Harry chewed on his lower lip for a moment. “Do you think this is the right thing to do? Should I give an interview?”

“Harry, do you want to?”

“Kind of.”

“Then yes, I think that this is the right thing for you to do. Miri will end up in the spotlight no matter what we do, whether we like it or not. You are Miri’s carrier, it’s your decision on when she enters the spotlight. I think that if you do it, and you have full control over when and how Miri appears in the media glare, then Miri will grow used to it and have more success in dealing with the public opinion than you did.” Severus groaned. “That came out wrong, love. I meant that, had you been introduced to the cameras and reporters earlier, in a more controlled way, you may have found it easier to deal with the constant attention.”

“I suppose it would be stupid of me to think that I could keep Miri out of the spotlight, wouldn’t it?”

“A little foolish, love, I’ll agree with you on that one.”

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It took less than a day for Luna’s father to get in touch after receiving Severus’ letter, and the interview was set up for the following Saturday. Dumbledore agreed for Colin to attend, and Colin’s parents found it a great honour that a ‘celebrity’ wanted their son to take the first official photos of his daughter.

On the morning of the interview, Severus walked into the nursery to find Miri sitting in her crib, giggling hysterically as Harry tore through her wardrobe. He held up every piece of clothing, eyed it critically and then threw it over his shoulder.

“Lost something?” Severus asked, sliding up behind his spouse and resting his hands on his hips. He briefly noted that Harry was still in his pyjamas. 

“Just getting Miri dressed,” Harry said as Severus ducked a flying pair of miniature tights.

“I see. But, the thing is, love, you don’t usually tear her room apart whilst getting her dressed. Is something bothering you?”

“No. I just can’t decide.”

Severus smiled and leaned in to kiss Harry’s neck before turning him to kiss his mouth. He kept on kissing, his tongue snaking inside and toying with Harry’s, his hands pulling his lover flush against him. He didn’t relent until Harry was kissing him back and had his fingers tangled in his hair. He pulled back and nipped at Harry’s swollen bottom lip.

“Do you want to talk to me now…or should I just keep kissing you until you do?” Severus murmured with a small smile.

Harry groaned. “I’m an idiot.”

“First off, no you’re not. Secondly, why do you think that?”

“I’m throwing my nine month old baby to the lions in the hope that it will make her life in the spotlight a little easier. What the hell was I thinking? This is a mistake, a huge mistake. Severus, I can’t do this.”

Severus pulled him in for a tight hug, smoothing his wayward hair and muttering soothing nonsense. “Harry, love, come on, come and talk to me,” Severus urged, leading Harry to the rocking chair. He sat Harry on the chair and sat himself on the footstool, their fingers entwined. “Now, I’m not doubting how you feel, but why do you feel it? Do you truly not want to do this? Or is this just nerves?”

“I don’t know,” Harry admitted.

“Harry, if you truly have changed your mind, if you really don’t want to do this, you truly believe that this is a bad idea, I can go downstairs right now and make it all go away. I can make this stop if you truly honestly don’t want it. But, if this is just nerves, then it is completely normal and understandable.”

“What if I do this wrong?” Harry asked in a whisper, his terrified green eyes locked on Severus’ black ones. “What if I dress her in the wrong thing, or hold her wrong, or say the wrong thing and the whole Wizarding public think I’m a terrible parent and…and…and…”

“Harry, listen to me. You are doing a fantastic job as a parent. You love Miri more than words and you do your very best in everything that has anything to do with her. You ask for help and advice where you need it, and you never turn away free suggestions from Molly or Anne. Every witch out there who has children has been right where you are - terrified of looking like a failure. Everyone will see that you are doing your best and that is all anyone could ask of you. And, if they dare to criticize, they’ll have me to deal with.”

“You mean it?”

“Every word. Now, do you truly not want to do this, honestly think it is a bad idea, or is it just nerves?”

“Just nerves,” Harry admitted.

“Right. So, looking at the weather outside, if this were any other Saturday, what would you dress Miri in?”

Harry looked out of the window and sighed. “If it were any other Saturday? I would dress her in the pink long-sleeve vest and blue denim pinafore dress with the white thick tights.”

As Harry said it, Severus uttered a spell to tidy up all of Miri’s clothes and then another to summon the outfit Harry had listed.

“Go and take a shower and get dressed, love. I will dress Miri and we’ll meet you downstairs.”

Harry moved to the door and then looked back at Severus, a question on his lips.

“The fitted black jeans and tailored green shirt with the red Dr Martins,” Severus said. “They’re already lying on our bed.”

Harry disappeared and Severus waited until he heard the shower going before picking Miri up and getting her dressed. 

She gurgled up at him as he bathed her and slipped her into a fresh nappy. “Your carrier is crazy sometimes, do you know that?” he asked and she shrieked a giggle at him. “See? You know exactly what I mean! We love him, oh yes we do, but he can be so anxious sometimes. Honestly, worrying about what you’re going to wear. I’ve never heard something so ridiculous. He has impeccable taste when it comes to you. You always look adorable when he dresses you. Me? I’m the one with no fashion sense. Hmmmm. Let us hope you take after your carrier.”

Severus continued to talk to her as he made his way down the stairs and slipped her into her highchair before turning his attention to Oliver.

“Now that the fashion crisis has been averted, what were you saying?”

“I was saying that I’ve looked over the contract from Mr Lovegood, like you asked me to, and it all seems pretty straightforward. The contract states that either you or Harry has to approve the final draft of the story before it can be published; the story can only be published in The Quibbler; any pictures remain the rightful property of you and Harry and can only be used with prior express permission. Pretty much cut and dry,” Oliver said, pointing bits out to Severus as he went along.

Oliver had decided to specialise in Modern Magical Law at Merlin’s, a very exclusive Wizarding university based in London. A student hoping to go to Merlin’s Academy of Fine Magical Arts was expected to achieve the highest grades at O.W.L. and N.E.W.T. level, have spotless behavioural records and outstanding character references. The rumour was that Hermione was already being headhunted by them to study Medicine and had gained a provisional acceptance. 

Oliver had been one of the few who had no problems with admission, and got in on full scholarship to study Law. Making it to his lessons was now the tricky part as he often spent the night with George and lost track of time.

Xenophillius Lovegood arrived, Dumbledore arrived with Colin, Harry came down the stairs and they were finally ready to begin.

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Solarin felt it, a deep jolt in the pit of her stomach, and she knew what she had to do. So, late that night, after all had gone to bed and the house was hushed and still around her, she dressed and silently made her way out of the front door.

When she reached it, St Mungo’s was practically deserted, and the nurses seemed to be incredibly sleepy. Nonetheless, she used her own special brand of magic to ensure she wasn’t seen as she slipped along the corridors.

“I’ve been waiting for you.”

Solarin looked at the older augur on the bed, watching her. They measured each other up, taking in similarities and differences, trying to determine who was the more capable of the two.

They were both pale, both thin, but they could honestly say that the similarities ended there. Solarin was the shorter, and the healthier looking. Evelyn was older and frailer looking. Her, presumably, once dark hair was now white, and her skin so wrinkled it looked as if a great drought had happened on her face. Whatever had happened to her, it had not been kind. Solarin had avoided thinking of her mother for weeks now, trying to forget and enjoy the life she had now. But she couldn’t help but wonder if this was what her mother would have looked like had she made it to old age. She had the same brown eyes her mother had had.

“Evelyn Prince,” Solarin said. “I can’t say it’s a pleasure finally meeting you in person, seeing as I didn’t know you existed until you took my brother over.”

Evelyn hacked out a laugh. “You’re a feisty little thing, aren’t you!”

“I find I live longer that way.”

The older augur looked her over. “I know you have questions. So ask them.”

Solarin reached into her bag and pulled out the damaged scrying glass. “Is this yours?”

“Yes.”

“What happened to it?”

“What happened to it?” Evelyn echoed in surprise. “Surely you must know that already. Can’t you feel it in the gold? See it in the glass?”

Solarin peered at the glass in her hand and tried to focus on whatever it was that emanated from it. But she still couldn’t name it, not even after all this time.

“I can feel it but I don’t know what it is.”

She smiled and motioned Solarin to a seat. “Then you’re more fortunate than I was,” she said as Solarin took the offered seat. “What you can feel is the echo of what I did to myself. You see, you wouldn’t be the first augur to hate what she is. Don’t deny it! I can see it in you! But, unlike you apparently have, I had no one to tell me it wasn’t a bad thing. So, I did the only thing I could think of. I tried to have my powers stripped.”

“That’s impossible for an augur.”

“So you’ve thought of it?”

“Of course I have. I’d be willing to put money on it that every witch in the world has, for at least one moment in her life, wanted to be without magic, thought her life would be simpler without it. But not many witches actually manage to find a potion able to do it. Magic is a gift, and to take that potion is to go against the law. You can’t buy it, it has to be made, and that recipe is only found in the darkest of Dark texts.”

Solarin realised then that she had made a mistake by the look in Evelyn’s eyes.

“I always did think at least one of Eileen’s children would be an excellent brewer, but I didn’t count on there being more than one,” she said with a smirk. “Your brother, what I saw of his mind, is an excellent brewer. I didn’t count on Eileen’s daughter having that talent also.”

Solarin made a choked noise in the back of her throat and Evelyn smiled. 

“So…you know then, what my beloved sister thought of me.”

“You?”

“Did you really think it was you she was trying to kill? Oh no, far from it. She loved you. She just couldn’t stand the thought of unleashing another me upon the world. You see, all those books you’ve managed to find…they’re useless without the one I have in my bag. Go on, go get it. I want you to have it, from one augur to another.”

Solarin retrieved the book as she had been ordered and looked at the worn cover.

“I have this book,” Solarin said. “My father-in-law gave it to my husband just after he met me. There’s nothing in this book I don’t already know.”

“You may have a book that looks similar to that one, but you don’t have that one. That book is one of a kind. The cover is just a fake, to make sure it doesn’t land in the wrong hands. Can you imagine what Lucius would do if he knew what was in that book? No one would be safe.”

Solarin peeled away the cover to find the real title of the book written in Ancient Greek. She knew just enough of the language to make an accurate translation. 

‘Secrets of the Forgotten Goddess: The Hidden Truths of the Augur.’

“That books holds every answer to every question anyone anywhere has ever asked about you. It was supposed to pass to you once it was realised what you were, but Eileen wouldn’t let me near you. Can’t blame her really. I’m hoping you’ll do something better with it than I ever did,” Evelyn said. Solarin looked up from the book and couldn’t quite believe what she was seeing.

The old witch was fading. Not growing weaker, but literally fading, becoming more transparent with every moment.

“What’s happening to you?” Solarin cried as she slammed her fist into the call button.

“My time’s up. I did too much, hurt too many. Read the book, you’ll understand. And, remember…it’s all about choice.”

And, with that, she fell back onto her pillow and vanished completely, leaving Solarin staring at the empty bed, holding the only answers she was ever going to find.

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It took until dinner preparations for anyone to realize Harry hadn’t been seen since lunch. Severus searched the house and found his spouse in the attic.

“Harry, are you all right, love? You’ve been up here for hours,” Severus said gently.

“I didn’t mean to be, I just lost track of time,” Harry said. “I finished my essay for Flitwick and decided to explore. I found this.”

Severus made his way over and examined the picture Harry was holding up. It was covered in a thick layer of dust and grime and it took him a moment to make out the picture through the glass. Harry had managed to clear the middle of the pane. It was a geisha, dressed in the traditional kimono, cherry blossoms in her hair, holding a paper fan to conceal her face. It gave her an air of mystery, as if she were giggling at the amusing sight of a man lusting after her. The colours were faded, he suspected that the pink kimono had once been red, but it was still a beautiful piece of art. He peered closer. It wasn’t paint, as he’d first assumed. It was all done in cross stitch.

“It’s beautiful, love,” Severus said.

“I found loads of them, but this is my favourite,” Harry said. “Can it be cleaned?”

“I don’t know. We could find out.” He peered over at the rows and rows of framed cross stich art. “Someone was a crafty little witch or wizard.”

“Huh?”

“These were all done by hand,” Severus explained, motioning to the dusty frames. “It’s called cross stitch, it’s a kind of embroidery.”

Harry was silent for a moment, looking closer at the geisha. “Can you do it?”

“Cross stitch?” Harry nodded. “No, I can’t, but Solarin can. She used to do things like these all the time, but it’s been a while since I last saw her pick up a needle. Minerva taught her one summer. I was needed at Hogwarts to brew some potions that were required in the Hospital Wing. Sol came with me. Minerva thought that she could use a hobby that didn’t include magic, something quiet, something small, that could be taught in a single afternoon.”

“Do you think she would teach me?”

“Minerva?”

“Solarin.”

“I don’t see why not. Did anyone ever teach you to sew a button?”

“Aunt Petunia used to have me fix Uncle Vernon’s shirts. I wasn’t half bad at it.”

“Well, as I understand it, cross stitch doesn’t take much more skill than that to begin with,” Severus said, glossing over Petunia’s ideas of appropriate activities for a young Harry. “Solarin’s in the kitchen, come and ask her.”

They made their way down to the kitchen, where Harry was pleased to find that Sirius remembered that it was his mother that had been into cross stitch, completing all of the art in the attic. Remus mused that no one told her it was a craft started by a muggle.

“Been a while since I last saw this,” Sirius said as he took the picture from Harry. “Bit of a mess.”

Remus leaned in, stealing a swift kiss, before waving his wand over the picture and restoring it to its original glory. The silken threads gleamed in the candlelight of the kitchen, reflecting and giving Sirius’ face a red tint.

“My mother used to do these all the time. She did try and teach me and my brother once, but I was more interested in flying a broomstick,” Sirius said. “Regulus gave it a fair go, but he got frustrated by it, that it didn’t happen immediately, that he had to actually put the work in.”

“It’s worth the work,” Solarin put in.

“Will you teach me?” Harry asked hopefully.

“To cross stitch? Sure. It’ll have to wait until tomorrow, though. I don’t have any supplies, I’ll have to go and get some, but I’ll teach you.”

Over dinner, Harry learned that several members of his family were crafty. The Weasley’s were musical, as he already knew, but he hadn’t known that Anne painted watercolours, and Tonks made jewelry, and Sam had a thing for polymer clay miniatures, probably started by Jack’s love of collectors dollhouses. Between them all, they could start their own gallery. Harry had never done a craft before, not counting the usual things in primary school which Petunia had thrown in the bin whenever Harry had dared to take them ‘home’, and he found himself wanting to try all of them at once. Severus chuckled, leaning in to kiss him and remind him that there was plenty of time, no one was going to refuse to show him how to do these things, but he only had one pair of hands, so one at a time was really the only way to go.

After dinner, Solarin dug out all of her completed cross stitch pieces. There were more than fifty. She had the usual flowers and animals, the occasional London themed one, like a double decker bus or a black cab. But then there were the other ones, the magical objects. A broomstick, a cauldron, a wand. They seemed straightforward enough, and Solarin said herself that they were the more simple patterns. Nixie fell in love with the tabby cat sitting on a brick wall, which was inspired by McGonagall herself.

“It’s been ages since I last did one of these,” Solarin said as she shook out a few pieces. “I keep meaning to have these framed, but I never manage to get around to it. Ah, here it is.” She pulled out a cross stitch of the Hogwarts shield and motto, surrounded by the four house crests. “This was one of the first of my more daring cross stitches. It took about three and a half months.”

Harry marveled over it, admiring the bright colours, the feel of the work beneath his fingers. One by one, these more complicated patterns were revealed to him. A depiction of Wolfsbane being brewed, a floating feather in the Charms classroom, an illuminated page from a Transfiguration text book. Harry was amazed as portraits were unveiled. Severus, Albus, Madame Pomfrey. And then Solarin giggled and blushed.

“Before I let you see the most complicated of all my pieces, you have to remember that I was slightly insane at the time,” she warned. She pulled out what looked like a rolled blanket, laying it out on the table, she and Severus unrolling it between them. When it was flat, the whole room was silent.

It was Hogwarts in full panoramic, complete with students at the candlelit windows, owls in the starry night sky, a sneaky late night Quidditch practice in session, a couple of students sneaking down to the Whomping Willow by lantern light, all of it captured in intricate detail on a twenty by six foot canvas. The flames of the candles, the stars in the sky and the crescent moon were all constructed in gold and silver threads.

“Now that would look incredible in the Great Hall,” Charlie said. “Has Dumbledore ever asked for it?”

“Once, when I was about half way through,” Solarin said. “To be honest, I meant to give it to him when it was finished, but it took me so long to do it, I forgot its purpose by the time it was done.”

“How long did it take?” Arthur asked, chuckling at the tiny game of Exploding snap visible through the window of the Gryffindor common room. 

“About three and a half years, give or take a few months, stitching some every day.”

“As I remember, didn’t we supposedly have a living room under this thing at one point?” Bill questioned with a grin.

“Supposedly,” she replied as Albus arrived through the Floo.

“You called?” he asked of Molly.

“Something you should see, a gift for the school,” Severus supplied, motioning to the table.

Albus was delighted by it, and spent a full hour examining every detail, chuckling as he found some new tiny element.

Harry went to bed that night dreaming of crafts by the hundreds.

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After breakfast, Solarin made a quick dash to a shop in Kentish Town to buy supplies, the only place she could think of that would have everything in one place, and then sat Harry down with her at the kitchen table.

“The first thing to remember when it comes to cross stitch is that it takes patience. There’s no quick way to do it, you just have to take your time. Now, are you sure you want to learn it? You can say no, like Nixie did,” she warned.

“I want to learn,” Harry said.

“All right then,” she said, pulling things out of her shopping bag. “I’ll start with the basics, teach you the way Minerva taught me.” She laid out a sheet of white fabric with holes in. “This is a specific fabric for cross stitch, it’s called aida. This one is made of cotton, and it’s called a 10 count. The count basically means how many holes there are per inch of fabric. The Hogwarts huge cross stitch I did was done on an 18 count, but this is a good beginners one.” 

She proceeded to explain what an embroidery hoop was and how it worked, what needles and thread were used, and how to decide on a pattern. Once Harry had chosen one of the simple flower patterns from the selection Solarin had provided, she had him choose a colour of thread and mounted the fabric in the hoop for him. She taught him to separate threads, to thread a needle, to catch the tail of the thread in the embroidery so you didn’t have a knot on the back distorting the finished piece. She went on to describe how you designed your own pattern, how you added names and sequins to a finished piece. She started him off, correcting little mistakes he made. She never lost her temper, not even when Harry displayed his frustrations by throwing his fabric-mounted hoop across the room. 

Within an hour Harry was quite happily finishing the first petal on his flower, proudly showing it off to the rest of the family. Severus breathed a sigh of relief that it had all gone smoothly.

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Nixie had given very little thought to what her life had been, preferring instead to live in the moment and dream of a happy future.

But the funny thing is that the past will always catch up with you, no matter how hard you ignore it.

Charlie walked into his bedroom to find Nixie curled up on his bed, hugging the stuffed puffskein he had had since he was a child. He slipped off his shoes and slid onto the mattress to wind himself around her, dipping his head to kiss her neck, smiling as she tilted her head to the side to give him a better shot.

“Do you want to talk about whatever it is that’s upset you?” he murmured.

“Not really,” she replied, barely above a whisper.

“Okay,” he said, pulling her tighter to him. “We’ll just lay here and cuddle then.”

She craned her neck to look at him. “Really? No pressure?”

“Rose, baby, when have I ever pressured you in anything? If you don’t want to talk right now, that’s okay. I’ll be right here when you do.”

They lay there for a few hours, eventually ending up with Nixie resting her head on Charlie’s chest, the former dragon tamer playing with her hair and humming to her.

“My mother’s dead,” she whispered. “Lucius…he killed her in Hogsmeade last night, in The Three Broomsticks. She was having dinner.”

She expected him to say something, to try and make her feel better like his mother would have done. But he didn’t. He just laid there holding her. And, strangely, it helped. He didn’t try to make her feel better, knowing fully well that it might not be pain she was feeling. He just laid there, letting her feel what she felt, not trying to alter it, just letting her know she wasn’t alone.

Nixie wasn’t sure what it was that she did feel. Narcissa had never really been a ‘mother’. Nixie had spent more time with the House Elves than with her mother. When she did see her mother, it was always fleeting, a quick glimpse here, something supposed to be a hug there. Nixie’s only clear memories of her mother were the ones of her leaving.

“Charlie?” she whispered.

“Hmmm?”

“Do I have to be sad?”

“No, baby. You feel whatever you want to,” he said without hesitation.

She arched up to kiss him, deepening it when he reciprocated, pulling them so he was hovering over her.

“Charlie?” she said as he bent his head to kiss her throat, his hand cupping her breast, and somehow her thigh had ended up hiked high on his hip.

“Too much?” he asked immediately, worried he had gone too far. He was very aware of his erection pressing against the zipper of his jeans and, subsequently, the little blonde beneath him.

“No, not too much,” she said, giving him a swift kiss to reassure him. “I was going to ask if you had any condoms or something like that.”

“I have condoms, and I know how to do the charm. Why?”

“Because I want to.”

“Want to…want to what?”

She felt herself burn red. “I want to have sex with you,” she whispered, giggling at the look of shock on his face.

“Really? I mean, are you sure? Because there’s no pressure, I won’t push you into anything, not until you’re ready, absolutely ready,” he said, babbling. 

He was silenced by a kiss that would have killed him if he had a weak heart. It was fiery and possessive and everything he knew was in Nixie but rarely came out to play.

Charlie didn’t argue anymore after that.

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Harry was ignoring the issue of The Quibbler. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to read the article, he did. He just wasn’t sure he should have given the interview in the first place.

So he carried on with his cross stitch, a new design of a bunch of balloons. He planned to turn it into a cushion cover when it was finished. He was sure the powdery threads he was using would look good in Miri’s room. His flower had been taken off by Solarin, along with a few of her own pieces, and framed. It now stood in pride of place on the mantelpiece in the living room.

Severus had proofread the article before it was published, as was stated in the contract, and he had reassured Harry that there was nothing bad in it, but he was still terrified. What if people took it the wrong way? What if they took what he said and used it against him, twisting his words? What if they saw something in the photographs that he didn’t see, something bad?

He worked on his cross stitch solidly for two hours before he finally managed to dredge up his Gryffindor courage and picked up the envelope with his pre-release copy in.

It was heavier than he remembered a Quibbler being, and it took him a few tries to actually open the envelope. The magazine slithered out and landed face up on his balloons. His picture wasn’t on the front page, which he was relieved about. His name was on the front page, but it was hidden between ‘When Nargles Attack’ and ‘What to do if your little Wizard wears Eyeliner’, which was what he had asked for.

He flicked through the pages, seeing his own face staring back at him.

“I want more children, just not yet.”

Harry Potter-Snape’s only interview and first official pictures of his family, exclusive to The Quibbler.

By Xenophillius Lovegood

Pictures by Colin Creevy

At seventeen, most wizards are preparing for their N.E.W.T.’s, experiencing their first taste of alcohol, and looking to score a few points with the ladies. But Harry Potter has never been a regular wizard. By the time Mr Potter entered Hogwarts, the world already had their eye on him, every witch and wizard knew his name, and everyone was sure he was destined to be someone very special indeed. Little did they all know, Harry was already special.

“I didn’t know what I was, I just sort of figured out that I wasn’t like other boys my age,” says the softly spoken, black haired wizard. “I never even heard the word hermaphrodite, and when I eventually did, I didn’t know it applied to me.”

To the world outside, Harry is a mystery. The elusive and introverted saviour has only ever given one other interview, and is notoriously camera shy. But for those in the know, Harry is just Harry.

“He’s our son, he’s just him, the way he is,” says Remus John Lupin-Black, 36, one half of Harry’s adoptive parents. 

“Harry is male,” says Sirius Lupin-Black, 36, the other half. “That’s how he sees himself, and how we all see him. He’s not a girl, he’s just not like other boys, which is a good thing. Being different is a good thing.”

And in this family, different covers just about everything. Werewolves, seers, ex-convicts, ex-Death Eater spies and everything else inbetween. Nothing is taboo in this household, and they like it that way.

“It’d get boring if we were all the same,” says Phoenix Rose Lupin-Black, 17, Harry’s beautiful blonde bombshell of an adoptive sister.

No one notices the differences, and if they do, it’s only to realize how special they make the different threads in this tapestry. Most of the family members don’t consider themselves different.

“And then, this little one happened, and I couldn’t really deny it anymore,” Harry giggles, cuddling his nine month old baby girl, Miri Solarin Lily Potter-Snape.

Miri (pronounced like a combination of miracle and happy) is a beautiful baby girl, dark ringlets, a gorgeous smile and her ‘mother’s’ striking green eyes. As this reporter spent the day with Harry and family, I found out first hand that Harry is more than dedicated to his daughter, he’s devoted. 

“She’s my world, my whole world,” says Harry, watching as his husband, Potions Master Severus Potter-Snape, 36, cuddles the tiny girl close. “I never knew I could love someone so much, and I can’t even imagine my life without her.”

Allowing us a tour of the beautiful nursery (complete with hand painted mural of teddy bears on broomsticks, charmed to chase a Snitch), Harry and Severus reveal that they worry about reactions to the age difference, but that it won’t change the way they feel, which is hopelessly in love.

“I couldn’t live without him,” Severus says, smiling shyly, gazing at his young husband with nothing less than adoration. “He’s the best thing to ever happen to me. With Miri, our lives our pretty much complete. True, we didn’t plan it this way, but I suppose no one really does. We wouldn’t change a thing.”

And what of more children?

“One day, maybe,” Harry says firmly. “I want more children, a brother or sister for Miri, but not yet. I’d like to graduate first,” he chuckles.

Harry read the article three times, just to be sure he was reading it right. And when he was sure, he scrutinized the pictures, trying to find something, anything, that someone could criticize. But he couldn’t. There was Miri being played with, Miri being fed, Miri laughing as Severus tickled her. But nothing he could see anyone complaining about. The article was shorter than he had expected, but he was glad of it.

He made his way down the stairs, running into Severus’ arms and kissing him forcefully, Severus getting fully involved as soon as he realized Harry was in a good mood.

“You read it then?” the older man asked as Harry let him up for air.

“It’s good, I come off good in it,” Harry said with a grin.

“Told you, love. Do you really think I’d let anything happen to you?”

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Harry walked into the kitchen and immediately tried to back out again. As he backed into something solid, he let out a little ‘eep’ of panic and clapped his hands over his eyes.

Bill looked down at the little brunet that had just smacked into his chest and then into the kitchen, letting out a small chuckle.

Remus was sat in his usual seat, with Sirius straddling him, the two of them lip locked with hands that couldn’t stay still. 

“Detach, guys, you’re traumatizing your son,” Bill called as he led Harry to his own seat, making sure he was sitting safely, before making his way to the fridge to retrieve the orange juice.

The Pureblood’s head whipped round to look at the redhead, before his blue eyes landed on his son, who was still covering his eyes and bright red. He eased himself out of Remus’ lap and into his own seat, and the two of them pulled themselves into the table to hide their obvious erections.

“It’s okay, pup, you can look, it’s safe now,” Remus said. Bill wasn’t quite sure who was the deeper red, Remus or Harry.

The little Seeker peeked through his fingers and then lowered his hands when he realised it was as Remus said. He accepted a glass of juice from Bill and glared at his parents.

“I know it’s your home and you should be comfortable to do that, guys, but come on! You have a bed for that, you know,” he complained.

“Nixie’s in our bed again,” Remus said. “Sorry, Harry. We really didn’t realize the time.”

Harry moaned noncommittally and watched as Bill began to get things out of the fridge for breakfast.

“You need a hand?” Sirius asked.

“Nope. See, this is me proving to my wife that I can be domestic with the best of them,” Bill said with a small smile.

“She made some comment?” Severus said as he entered the room carrying Miri, who was happily waving Smoo about. 

“She said I must’ve missed the domestic part of my upbringing,” the redhead replied tensely as he set warming charms to a load of muffins. “She said I wouldn’t know how to be domestic if my life depended on it.”

“I’m sure she was joking,” Severus defended as he let Remus take Miri from him, the tiny girl squealing in delight.

“Joking or not, she’s wrong, and I’m going to prove it,” Bill said as he began to make scrambled eggs, sliding a load of crumpets under the grill on his way to get the milk.

“Well, lead on then, Domestic God you are,” Sirius said with a cheeky grin and they all shared a chuckle, before Harry leaned in to Severus.

“Go on, love,” the older wizard reassured. “You’ll never know if you don’t ask and I can’t give you the answers.”

The little Gryffindor snuggled in a little more before he sighed, seemingly gathering his courage before looking Remus right in the eye.

“I was wondering…well, I wanted to know…” he stammered.

“Harry, you can ask us anything, you know that,” Sirius comforted.

“Where are my parents buried?” he blurted out and there was a sudden hush all through the kitchen. “I asked Severus but he doesn’t know.”

Remus, at a loss of what to say at the unexpected question, looked to the Potions Master for a little guidance.

“I didn’t go to the funeral,” Severus supplied. “I had Solarin and I didn’t think that yet another funeral would be the best thing for her. Harry asked me a few days ago and I assumed you would know the answer.”

“Well…” Remus sighed. “Harry, I’m sorry to say that I don’t know where they are. I wasn’t in any fit state to leave the house, let alone attend their last farewell. After losing them, and then Sirius, and then you, I was in a very sorry state indeed.”

Sirius pulled his lover in close, whispering reassurances in his ear about never being alone like that again. Remus sighed, closing his eyes and letting himself be held, bathing in the words of comfort and love.

“Does anyone know?” Harry asked after Severus’ telling him that it was alright to ask, that Remus wouldn’t appreciate his words of comfort at that moment.

“Albus might,” said Solarin as she entered with Dorian in tow. “Failing that, it should be in the national registry, if they had Wizarding funerals. If they had Muggle ones, I have a few friends that are good at tracking down information like that.”

“Could you find out for me?”

“Of course,” she said with a smile. She stifled a giggle as she caught sight of her husband. “What are you doing?”

“Making breakfast,” he said sharply. [See, I can do domestic.]

[I didn’t mean it seriously,] she replied. [I was joking, but if you want to do this all by yourself…]

[You little…]

[Since when are you so sensitive about my joking at your expense anyway?]

Bill looked away sheepishly and she peered at him suspiciously. [Don’t make me dig,] she warned. [I’ll go as deep as I have to, to find out.]

[I wish you wouldn’t.]

[Then give me a reason not to.]

“I am a real husband,” Bill said out loud, causing the kitchens inhabitants to look at him curiously. Everyone had joined them now.

“I never said you weren’t,” Solarin replied, very aware of her in-laws watching them.

“You didn’t, I did,” he said.

“Bill, what are you talking about?”

“A real husband can cook, a real husband can take care of a house, a real husband can take care of his wife and a real husband can give her-”

Bill snapped his mouth shut and shoved the spatula he was holding at his mother before storming out of the room. Solarin motioned to Severus to watch Dorian for her before she followed him. 

She found him sitting on Dorian’s bed, holding their sons stuffed dragon.

“So, what is it you think you can’t give me?”

He looked up into her dark eyes and sighed, knowing that there was no point in lying.

“I can’t give you a baby,” he whispered. “I had Sam do some tests, you know, thinking that maybe we could do that IVF thing he was talking about. But the results came back bad.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m sterile, or might as well be. According to Sam my sperm count is one of the lowest he’s ever seen and what swimmers I can make are apparently going in circles. You always said I had no sense of direction.”

She snorted out a laugh and then clapped her hand over her mouth. “Sorry, I shouldn’t laugh,” she said. She came forwards and sat on the bed facing him. “Bill, we have a beautiful son, why would you ever think that he’s not enough for me?”

“I never said he wasn’t enough,” he argued, horrified. “I love Dorian, more than I have words for, you know that.”

“Then why all this about a baby?”

“Because I want it for you,” he said. “I want to give you a child. I want to see Dorian grinning from ear to ear because he felt his brother or sister kick in your belly. I want that, I want to give that to you, this one thing that every other woman has. I want that for you, and I can’t give it to you and it makes me so angry.”

She was completely silent and still for a moment, before she surged forwards and kissed him with everything she had.

“I love you,” she whispered. “I love you so very much.”

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Harry knew he shouldn’t be spying. But Severus had told him it was okay to be curious, so, if no one knew what he did, it was okay to spy, wasn’t it? Just this once?

He watched as Ron leaned in to kiss Hermione, the girl wrapping her arms around his neck, letting him roll on top of her. They made it look so easy, so effortless. Did it look like that when others were that intimate? Did he and Severus look like that?

It seemed to explode out of Hermione, the passion with which she ripped Ron’s clothes off. It looked so rough, so wild. Had he done that, been that wild? Hmmm. Ron’s body didn’t look so different from his own. Maybe his chest was a little firmer, but Ron was male, definitely male. Surely there would be some difference. There were similarities between Ron and Severus, Harry could see that. Smooth skin, hard muscles, and hair. On his legs, his chest, in a thin strip from his belly button, leading down to that part of him that fascinated Harry. 

It looked so harmless, all soft and curled against his friend’s thigh. He didn’t understand why it scared and intrigued him so much. He had his own. But then it began to grow, thickening, widening, rising between the two of them until it was almost flat against Ron’s stomach. 

The redhead reached out and unbuttoned the black silk of Hermione’s pyjama top and Harry was transfixed. So those were breasts. They looked soft and smooth and sort of strange, but not in a bad way. It was just so far out of Harry’s frame of reference. The closest he had was his own when he had swelled to feed Miri. But Hermione was…well, Harry thought she was kind of beautiful. She was topless and she was laying there, moaning as Ron’s lips moved down her torso, her pale skin almost glowing in the moonlight.

She curved in ways Harry hadn’t considered before. There was such a sharp pull inward between her ribs and her hip that Harry wondered how she breathed. But she was made that way, and he knew she breathed, so it must work. She shifted under her husband, he surged over her to lock lips, his hand disappearing beneath her pyjama bottoms. She threw her head back and gasped, Ron grinning in…it looked like satisfaction to Harry, maybe pride. 

He’d seen more than enough and he backed away, walking as fast as he could to his own bathroom. He stripped off his clothes and looked at himself in the mirror, really looked for the very first time. Severus told him he was beautiful, and he knew from Severus’ reactions that he was sexually appealing to Severus, but he had never really looked at himself before.

His skin was pale, so pale that his thin blue veins showed beneath the white expanse. He was littered with scars, ridges and craters dotting him in irregular patterns. He was as skinny as he had always been, maybe a little more healthy looking than when he lived with the Dursleys. His stomach was flat, surprisingly toned considering he’d been pregnant less than a year ago. And his chest…well, it wasn’t like Severus’, or like Ron’s. There was no firm pectorals, but he wasn’t like Hermione either. He was sort of flat, but still he curved outwards slightly. He had a slight pull inwards under his ribs, leading out into the curve of his hip, the sweep of his buttocks. And his penis…well, it was long and smooth, definitely longer than Ron’s and Severus’s. 

“Harry?”

The young man turned as Severus spoke, the slightly sleepy man standing in the doorway in nothing but a pair of pyjama bottoms.

“I woke up alone, I was worried. You’ve been in here ages. I did knock, love,” Severus said as he entered the room, closing the door behind himself. “Harry, not that there’s anything wrong with it, but why are you standing here naked?”

“Nothing, no reason,” he said, far too quickly for Severus’ liking. 

The Potions Master slowly moved forwards and stood behind his lover, his hands resting on his hips, his chin on his shoulder. 

“No reason?”

Harry sighed. “I saw Hermione and Ron…you know. And I had questions…about me.”

“Ah, I see. Anything I can help with?”

“No, not really. I just…I’ve never looked at myself before…like this.”

“And?”

“It’s not so bad.”

“Well, I like it,” Severus said with a smirk, his hips thrusting so his erection nudged Harry. 

“I see that. Feel like putting it to use?”

“With you? Always.”

Harry turned in his arms, linking his wrists around Severus’ neck and pulling him down to join their lips. Harry surrendered to it as Severus slipped his tongue into his mouth, twining with his own, the taller man pulling Harry in closer to his body, so they were skin to skin.

Slowly, Severus backed them towards the wall, unwinding one arm to blindly press a palm against it. Harry gasped as his back hit the cool tile, the contrast between it and Severus’ hot skin enflaming his desire. 

“Harry…I love you…you know that, don’t you?” Severus breathed between kisses, his hands roaming over the pale expanse of Harry’s skin, his palm rising up to cup the curve of Harry’s skull.

“Of course I know it.”

Severus grinned into the kiss and slipped his hands between Harry and the wall, trailing his fingertips over the dipped line of the little wizards spine, moaning as Harry shivered. His lips slipped down to taste the delicate flesh of his throat, his hands finding their way away from Harry’s skin long enough to push down his bottoms. He felt himself shiver as Harry’s smaller hands tickled along his chest, fingers closing around nipples and pulling. 

“I want you,” Harry breathed, moving to nibble an earlobe.

“How?” Severus murmured, his hands kneading the perfect round globes of Harry’s arse. “How do you want me?”

“Every which way I can,” Harry replied cheekily. “But, for now, I want you right here.”

“Mmmmm, against the bathroom wall?”

“Yup.”

“Hmmm, a new one for us,” he chuckled as Harry somehow managed to jump up and curl his legs around Severus’ waist.

“It’s good to keep it fresh,” Harry said as Severus pressed him more firmly into the wall, lowering him slightly to get the right angle for penetration, letting the tip of his erection slide along the slick opening he found.

“Someone’s been at Tonks’ girly mags again,” he sing-songed as he eased the tip of himself into his lover.

Harry’s head fell back in ecstasy, the thunk of it reverberating around the room. He felt the long thick length slide into him, the friction pulling at him in interesting ways that he was sure he would never get tired of. He always marveled at how different it was without the lubricant, more raw somehow, but no less satisfying for it. 

He wrapped his arms around Severus’ shoulders and tried to remember how to breathe as Severus finished his forwards push. He felt full, his clit rubbing against the base of his husband’s shaft, sending lightning bolts shooting up his spine. He surrendered to Severus’ kiss, whining into his mouth, wishing he would move but not knowing how to speak to tell him. 

Luckily, Severus got the message, slowly withdrawing until only the head of his penis remained in the tight welcoming sheath, before thrusting forwards, going slowly. After all the months they had been together, after all the times he had taken Harry, Severus still worried about hurting him, about some sad remnant of the past surfacing at just the wrong moment and ruining their happiness at touching each other.

Harry endured the slow thrusts for a little while, letting his body relax around his lover, before he grew frustrated. It wasn’t enough, and Severus should know that, so why wasn’t he speeding up? Harry tried to thrust himself onto the straining member but found himself unable to. All he managed to do was press his heels repeatedly into Severus’ slowly moving backside.

“Yes? Is there something you wanted?” the Potions Master questioned.

“Nyugh!” Harry gurgled as Severus surged deeply, embedding himself to the root, seemingly able to stay there forever without movement.

The older man chuckled. “Hmmm, now what could that possibly translate to? Could it be that you want me to stop?”

Harry gasped and managed to regain enough sense to bite him on the shoulder, causing the man to twitch inside him. Harry cried out in frustrated pleasure as he was caressed so deeply, so intimately.

“All right, not stopping. Hmmm, then it must mean that you want more than this?”

“Yes, oh yes! Please, ah!”

Severus ginned at the gasping thanks and leaned in to suckle at his throat, his thrusts beginning once more, deeper and harder, faster than before. His thighs burned deliciously with the effort, and he felt the sweat slowly sliding down his back and dripping down his forehead to blind him. Harry’s arms tightened around his neck, the sprite crying out in ecstasy.

It went on like that, the heat between them coiling tighter and tighter, Harry’s cries getting louder, Severus’ rich baritone joining them to create a symphony of pleasure that bounced off the walls. 

Eventually, neither could take anymore, and they lost their rhythm, all sense of everything in their straining need to find completion. They exploded, Severus near screaming as his seed poured from him into Harry’s willing body, the little wizards tight channel clenching around him as Harry screamed and bit at his shoulder and pulled at his hair.

They found themselves sprawled across the tiled floor, Harry on his back with Severus’ ear pressed against his slowing heart. 

Harry considered that if he inspired such passion and devotion from his husband, then he couldn’t look too bad.

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The whole house smelled of baking and there was no longer a free space in the kitchen. 

“Not more?” Arthur asked incredulously. He had just returned from work and he took in the sight of his daughter-in-law baking yet another batch of cookies. Dorian was sitting on the counter, his little sock covered toes wriggling in delight as Solarin let him lick another bowl.

“I just can’t figure out what they’re missing,” she said as she looked again at her cookery book. 

Arthur sighed. Bill had told him and Molly that this constant baking was a good thing, that the little witch had found herself a new project to attack and to leave her to it. But there was only so much they could physically consume.

“What makes you think they’re missing something?” the man asked as he set down his briefcase and pulled off his work robes, toeing off his shoes so he could pad across the kitchen and let Dorian feed him cookie dough.

“Try this,” she said, passing his a still-warm cookie. He took a bite and smiled as it practically melted on his tongue.

“Oh, now that’s good,” he said. “Much better than this mornings.”

“But there’s still something missing.”

Arthur finished off his cookie and reached for a second. “Less ginger, maybe?”

“Hmmm, maybe.”

“No, the ginger is perfect, just enough bite, but there is something. You need something to cut through the bite of the spice. Hmmm. Chocolate,” he said decisively. “They need chocolate. Dip them in it, or chocolate chips, something like that. They have the bite of the ginger, they need the sweetness of chocolate to balance it.”

“Of course,” she said with a smile of triumph. “Why didn’t I think of that?”

“Too close to the situation. Solarin, can I ask you…why all the pastries? There was the sponge cakes, the cupcakes, the doughnuts, the éclair’s, and now the cookies. Are we looking a little thin to you?”

She giggled as she lifted Dorian down from the counter, the little wizard scampering off with a handful of cookies to share with Nixie.

“I have this idea, it might be a little out there, but still…”

“Do tell,” Arthur urged. He poured himself a large glass of milk and snagged the plate of cookies on his way to the table.

“Well…I was walking down Diagon Alley the other week and I saw this empty shop near the twins. It used to be an apothecary, I think. I think it was the fraudulent one that resulted in Remus’ pregnancy. Anyway, I contacted the estate agent, I was curious, and he let me take a look around. It would be perfect as a bakery.”

“Ah, I see. So I take it you’re tired of being home all day?”

“No, I didn’t say that,” she defended. “I just think I need something to occupy myself. I love Dorian, you know I do, but I need more than just him.”

Arthur placed a hand on top of hers. “Relax. Bill already told me and Molly something along those lines. I think it’ll be good for you to have something to do all day. You keep yourself too alone,” he said gently. “I don’t think it’s a good thing. Solarin, you’re a hell of a witch, and a wonderful wife and mother, and that’s enough of a description for Molly. But I think you need more in a description of you than that.”

She nibbled at her lower lip for a moment. “You don’t think anyone would mind, do you? I mean, if I went to work?” she asked as she pulled off her cardigan.

Arthur chuckled. “No, no one would mind. Personally, I think it would be healthier for you if you did this. And it would be better for Dorian. If his mother is happier, then he will be.”

“You’re right. And I think it’ll be good for him to have some kind of family business to go into. I mean, he could go into the Ministry or Curse Breaking, but it might be nice for him to have this one little choice which means he doesn’t have to use his magic.”

“And he’d love being around baking things all day. You could even have a little play area for him out the back.”

She smiled and then looked around the kitchen in sudden confusion. “Do you smell that?”

“Smell what?” he questioned as he polished off his fifth cookie.

“Something’s burning,” she replied, crossing to check the oven.

He watched as she made her way around the kitchen, Sirius and Remus joining him at the table to help him consume the cookies. 

“What is she doing?” Sirius asked. “Making more cookies?” He looked so hopeful that Remus leaned in and kissed his cheek.

“She says she smells burning.”

Remus looked around and then at the augur in confusion. “Solarin, why are you sweating?”

“Because it’s hot in here,” she said.

“No, it’s not,” the werewolf replied. “I was actually about to close the window. It’s cold in here.”

“But…”

Remus made his way over, feeling her forehead. There was no fever, no actual heat coming from her. Remus looked at Sirius and a silent communication passed between them – an advantage of being married so long - and the Animagus made his way from the room.

“Sol, come sit down,” Remus urged, guiding her towards a chair. As his hand touched her arm she hissed in pain. He was alarmed to see, as he removed his hand, an imprint of his hand on her pale skin. It was red and angry, beginning to blister.

She collapsed into the chair, gasping. “It’s so hot,” she moaned. Remus retrieved an ice pack from the freezer, but at the touch of it the witch half screamed. “What’s happening?” 

Sirius returned with Sam on his heels. The Healer made his way over and tried to get a look at his patient, but it wasn’t to be.

Solarin gasped, lurching forwards as her body shook. When she looked up her eyes were black, unseeing.

“Get Severus, get him now,” Sam ordered. “Sol, come back to us. Come on, Sol, come back.”

She reached out blindly, her hands finding his shoulders and gripping so tightly he winced in pain. “No, oh no,” she cried, tears falling down her cheeks. 

Severus came running into the room, Harry following him, and took Solarin from Sam.

“Solarin, sweetheart, talk to me,” Severus demanded, his hands on her ribs. He was almost shouting. “What do you see? Solarin, where are you?”

“Oh, no, please,” she moaned. “Run, we have to run. No, don’t let him see.”

“Who? Solarin, who are you running from?”

“Faster…”

Mad-Eye came in as Bill arrived through the Floo. The redhead looked around in panic and shot forwards as he caught sight of his wife. It took Mad-Eye and Arthur taking an arm each to stop him.

“Stand back, let her do this, Severus will take care of her,” Arthur whispered to him.

“But…I…” Bill tried to protest, tears in his eyes, and Arthur hugged his son.

“You can’t help, not right now. You have to step back, let Severus help her now.” 

The redhead nodded and Arthur let go of him, leading him to a chair and standing with his hand on Bill’s shoulder. 

Severus spent a frantic few more minutes trying to get Solarin to tell him what she saw, watched by every inhabitant of the room, before Molly rushed to a drawer, digging out some paper and grabbing one of Dorian’s crayons, urging Severus to move back and turn the young witch to face the table.

As soon as the crayon was in her hand, Solarin began to draw, uncaring of whether she hit paper or the wood of the table. It didn’t seem to make any sense, what she was trying to show them. There were boxes and bottles, the spill of some sort of potion on a floor, the curved wisp of smoke. They could make out flames, and a pair of eyes. 

“It’s Fred and George,” Oliver declared. “She’s seeing the shop, look.” He pointed to the middle of her scribbling’s where there was the clear image of a triple W, the new logo the boys had just decided on.

“He’s coming for them,” Solarin whispered. “He’s coming.”

Mad-Eye and Tonks were already at the kitchen door when Solarin screamed, falling from her chair to scratch at the floor and writhe in pain. The dark stain of blood was bright against the white of the vest she was wearing, and Severus gripped at her wrists to try and keep her still. She screamed again, a sound that went through all of them, and a bright slash appeared on her back.

“She’s manifesting,” Mad-Eye said, before he and Tonks Apparated from the room.

It seemed to carry on forever, the screams and blood, until finally the witch lay silent. 

“Where’s Dorian?” Solarin asked, her voice barely a whisper, hoarse through all the screaming.

“Sirius took him upstairs, away from all this,” Sam said. “Come on, let me take a look at you.”

Slowly, they eased the witch back into her chair and Bill held a tea towel over her breasts as Sam cut away the blood soaked mess that used to be her top. The Curse Breaker was happy he couldn’t see what everyone else could, as Remus couldn’t even look, and his father had to rush to the bathroom to throw up.

“How you doing?” he whispered as Sam stood back, just looking at the damage, trying to figure out where to start.

“What if they’re not okay?” she asked, tears in her eyes. “What if I wasn’t fast enough? What if Mad-Eye and Tonks didn’t get there in time? What if they’re-”

“They’re not,” he said firmly, leaning in to kiss her and calm her rising panic. “You’ll see. Mad-Eye and Tonks will be back with them soon. Until then, let’s patch you up, okay?”

It took Sam over an hour to put a stop to the bleeding and assemble some semblance of a back from what was left of Solarin’s. As Bill helped her into a backless top, loosely lacing the strings, Sam sighed.

“That’s the best I can do for now. Give it a few days to heal a little, and I’ll take another crack. I am sorry to say that your tattoo is history, Sol. Sorry,” he proclaimed as he cleared up a little.

“I don’t care,” she mumbled. “Where are they?”

“Relax,” Severus said. “We don’t know anything, yet.” Harry had come down and was watching from his perch on the kitchen counter, Miri babbling away. The tiny witch had suffered an attack of the sneezes and was a little over warm, but nothing like Solarin. Miri was gumming a teething ring, sitting in nothing but her nappy.

“Don’t tell me to relax, you didn’t see what I saw!” she snapped. “You didn’t see what he was going to do, how angry he is, how unrestrained. I can’t relax, not until I see that they’re in one piece.”

As she said it, there were four faint pops in the hallway, and then the two Aurors made their way into the room, followed by the twins.

Before anyone could even consider voicing an objection, Solarin was across the room and pulling the boys into a crushing hug, the two of them looking surprised but relieved to be in one piece.

It took a long while for everyone to reassure themselves that the twins were okay, though they couldn’t say the same for the shop.

“It’s all gone,” George said as they sat around the table. “All that stock, up in smoke.”

“Better the stock than you,” Oliver insisted. He had taken hold of his Weasley as soon as Solarin had released her grip on him. He had even refused to let George sit in his own seat, he had yanked him out of the chair he’d chosen and plonked him on his lap, his eyes leaving no room for argument.

“It was Lucius,” Fred said, his eyes red rimmed from smoke, his shaking hands clutching a large glass of bourbon. “Him and Pettigrew and Lestrange and Greyback. Why didn’t anyone mention how fucking huge that werewolf is? I mean, Remus and Sam are pretty solid guys, both would be pretty hard to best in a fistfight, but Greyback…”

“Don’t think about it,” Remus said, more sharply than he had intended. “Greyback is nothing like your average werewolf.”

“I think we can just cross off the ‘were’ part of it,” Sirius said. He was in Remus’ lap, fully unwilling to lose contact with Remus for even an instant. “There’s very little human left in him at this point.”

“So…what do we do?” Arthur asked, changing the subject and allowing Remus to snuggle into Sirius without it being a public display. “About Solarin, I mean. She’s a mess, we can’t keep having this happen. I dread to think of how well she would handle it if this happened again.”

“Where is she?” Anne questioned.

“Bill managed to convince her to rest,” Severus said. “He’s taken her to lie down.” The Potions Master sighed, glancing over to Harry, who was still sitting on the kitchen counter under the window with Miri on his lap. The tiny witch was happily patting Smoo, babbling away to it. “As for the early warning system that seems to have developed, Mad Eye will work with her to find a way around it. He thinks she might benefit from clairvoyance lessons once more.”

“When can we start Miri on those?” Harry questioned quietly.

“I asked, love,” Severus said, making his way over and stealing a quick kiss. “Mad Eye says he won’t even consider it until she’s a year old. He says she’s just too young for them.”

“But…”

“I know, but he’s adamant. He says too much too soon could do more harm than good. He told me that she needs to have her control before he starts the lessons. I know it’s hard to wait, love, but it really is the best thing for her.”

It took a moment, but Harry eventually sighed and nodded, leaning in to kiss Severus to reassure himself, his slim fingers combing through Miri’s curls.

“What about Lucius and his little sycophants?” Sirius questioned.

“Got away, again,” Arthur supplied.

They all groaned. 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

“Harry?”

Severus winced as the heavy book tumbled to the floor, landing on his little husbands toes with a thud.

The Potions Master hurried over, helping his lover onto the bed and taking the sore foot in his hands. Harry hissed as his long fingers rubbed the reddened toes. 

“I’m sorry I startled you, love,” Severus murmured. “I should’ve hummed or whistled or something.”

“It wasn’t you,” Harry said, his cheeks reddening, looking anywhere but at his husband. “It was my fault.”

“Of course it wasn’t,” Severus argued.

“But I-” Harry’s mouth snapped shut.

Severus peered at his lover, scrutinizing how embarrassed he looked. “Harry, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing!” Harry cried, too quickly for Severus’ liking.

“Harry…you know, whatever it is, you can tell me. There is nothing that will make me love you any less,” he cajoled. 

“But I shouldn’t have been doing it.”

“Doing what?”

“Looking through your things,” Harry whispered.

Severus glanced down at the book that had landed on his husbands toes. It was a photo album, his photo album. It contained all the pictures he had of his parents, and the ones of Solarin as a child, as well as pictures from his own schooldays and the copies of Harry’s own photographs.

He picked it up and smoothed his hand over the embossed leather cover.

“I don’t mind you looking at this,” Severus said quietly. “There’s nothing in my past I’m too ashamed of, not with you, anyway. I have no troubles having you know anything you wanted to know.”

“But I didn’t ask. I should have asked.”

“Well, yes, it is good manners to ask before looking through another person’s things, but…Harry, are you waiting for me to yell at you for looking at this without asking?”

He saw his beet red husband nod guiltily and sighed. He gathered Harry into his arms, pressing the book into his hands.

“I’m not your relatives, I’m not going to yell at you,” Severus said, his voice quiet but firm. “It’s been ages since you’ve let the thought of them get to you like this. Can I ask what’s set this off?”

“I was just thinking.”

“Mmmm.”

“And…your photo’s…they made me think…of-of all the times I got left with Mrs Figg.”

“Mrs. Figg? Arabella? How do you know Arabella?”

“She was the neighbor they left me with.”

“Left you with? When?”

“Every year on Dudley’s birthday, while they took him out, and they used to leave me with her when they went on holiday.”

It all suddenly clicked into place for the confused older man.

“Harry…all those stories you’ve told me, about Dudley. When he got sunburnt in Benidorm, and food poisoning in Madrid, those stories of holidays your relatives went on…you didn’t go with them, did you?”

“No.”

“And my pictures…You were looking at these ones, weren’t you?” he asked, opening the book to display pictures of a very young Solarin on a Mediterranean beach, her pale skin slightly sunkissed. Harry nodded.

“Harry…me and you, we’ve never really talked about the Dursley’s.”

“Yes, we have.”

“Not really. You’ve told me some things, small moments, things you missed out on, the name calling and that. But there’s a lot that you’ve not told me, isn’t there?”

“Maybe,” Harry mumbled.

“Can I ask you some things about your childhood? Would that be okay, can we talk about it?”

“You promise you won’t get mad at me?”

Severus suppressed his chuckle. “I swear.”

“Then yes, we can talk.”

The Potions Master lay back, propping himself up on a mound of pillows and holding his arms out so Harry could snuggle into him. He considered where to start.

“If I ask you some yes or no questions, would that be easier for you?” he whispered.

Harry nodded into his chest and he kissed the dark hair under his chin.

“Did any of them hit you?”

“Yes,” Harry whispered.

“Often?”

Harry was silent as he thought about it. “Sometimes,” he clarified. “And only Dudley.”

“Name calling?”

“Often.”

“Deprivation?”

“What’s that?”

“Did they ever make you go without food or water? Lock you away? Ignore you?”

“Yes.”

“Which one?”

“All of them. They all did it.”

“What did they deprive you of?”

“Sometimes food, they used to lock me in my cupboard a lot, and they liked to pretend I didn’t exist.”

“How often did they starve you?”

“I don’t know, it just happened. It was just meals here and there.”

Severus bit his tongue. He knew Harry was downplaying it. “Harry, what’s the longest you ever went without food at the Dursley’s?”

“Eight days,” the sprite whispered after a few moments thought.

“Did they ever withhold water?”

“No. They tried once, but I passed out and after that it didn’t happen again.”

“Harry, what did you hate most about living there when you were young, I mean before you were told about magic and such,” Severus asked, changing track.

“That Dudley got sweets and stuff and I didn’t. I couldn’t work out why he got things and not me. I got his hand me downs, but they never bought anything for me if they could help it.”

“What about birthdays and Christmas? Surely they didn’t leave you out then?”

“Yes, they did.”

Severus sighed and hugged Harry closer. He wasn’t so sure that this talking was helping, nor was he convinced that he could do anything to help. There were no Time Turners left, so he couldn’t go back and change anything. He supposed he could be angry at Albus for leaving Harry with his relatives for so long, but what would that do? Just make him angry at Albus all over again. He didn’t need any help with that. Be angry at the Dursley’s? Well, that was a little pointless, Solarin had enough anger over what they did to Dorian for the both of them.

So, he wasn’t going to get angry, or try and change anything. He was just going to make the present better than the past.

As Harry fell asleep, Severus slid him across the bed to an actual pillow and covered him with the blanket Anne had made for them. He made his way downstairs in search of his daughter and the witch who was babysitting.

“Sol.”

“Ah, there you are,” she said as he entered the playroom, disentangling her long hair from Miri’s fist, successfully stopping her from shoving it into her mouth. “Here you go, she can try and eat your hair for a while.”

Severus accepted the baby and chuckled as she squealed at him. “Hello, my beautiful baby girl. Have you been good?”

“Good Sin.”

“Ah, you were good for Solarin were you? That’s my angel.” He gently set her on her squishy behind in the playpen and smiled as she started smashing blocks into each other before shoving one into her mouth.

“How’s Harry?” Solarin questioned.

“Don’t ask,” Severus said simply. “I was wondering…you used to travel when you lived in the muggle world. Was it difficult?”

“Not particularly,” she said as she pulled out her wand and waved it to make all the toys slide back into their rightful places. “I’ll admit, magical ways to travel are faster, but there’s something fun about going by plane, seeing the clouds from that high.”

“I thought you hated heights,” Severus said with a smile.

“A plane has a floor.” She turned around as he beckoned and pulled her hair out of the way so he could take a look at the dressing on her back.

“This needs changing, you’re seeping,” he said, pulling out his wand and summoning the necessary components. He was glad she couldn’t see his grimace as he pulled off the bloodied dressing. “So, you didn’t have any troubles when travelling? Being around that many muggles didn’t set off your abilities?”

“Nope. Strange, it probably should have but I didn’t have any problems.”

“I want to take Harry away somewhere, somewhere warm, with a beach and a pool,” Severus admitted as he rubbed ointment into the stitches Sam had so neatly sewn into his sisters skin.

“And you want to know if it’s safe to take Miri on a plane,” she finished for him. “I don’t see any problems, but to be safe I’d check with Mad Eye.”

“And Lucius?”

“Oh, don’t worry about him. All the boarders have been closed. Once you’re through passport security he won’t be a worry.”

“Are you sure? I know Mad Eye said the muggle authorities were aware of a dangerous criminal on the loose, but…”

“I know, it didn’t stop Sirius so why should it stop Lucius. Firstly, Lucius isn’t an Animagus, I promise you that. Secondly, do you really think Lucius would even dream of you taking Harry out of the country? He’s not that smart, Severus.”

The man laughed. “You have a point. So, how do I actually go about taking Harry and Miri on holiday?”

She held still as he secured the last of the tape on her back and then turned to face him. “Firstly, do the three of you have passports?”

“No. Mine’s out of date and I know Harry and Miri don’t have them.”

“Right, so you give all three birth certificates to Arthur and he takes them to the right department in the Ministry and they’ll sort that for you. Second, you’ll need some muggle money to pay for a holiday, which you do at a travel agents. You can find them on most high streets.”

“So…where do I take them?”

She giggled. “There are lots of places. If it was me, I’d say somewhere in the Mediterranean. Best times to go with Harry would probably be the beginning or the end of the tourist seasons, which are April and September, but some places are open as early as the beginning of March, and some are still open right through until November, so it pays to talk to a travel agent. If you want, I could get you some brochures when I’m out tomorrow.”

“Thank you.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Remus had picked the moment with great care. 

He had ensured that Sirius had enjoyed the dinner at the expensive restaurant, and consumed at least a bottle of wine. Then they had gone to bed in an expensive hotel with pure white Egyptian cotton sheets and lots of easily melting chocolate. He had teased Sirius until he couldn’t think straight and then taken him until there wasn’t a thought in that pretty little head. 

And, now that they were laying there in a state of post-coital bliss, Remus knew he was never going to get a better moment.

“Sirius?”

“Mmmm,” the Pureblood moaned, too blissed out to form an articulate response.

“You know how we really trust Charlie with Nixie?”

“Mmmmm.”

“Well…I think they had sex.”

Remus counted off the stunned moments of silence in his head as he waited for what he’d said to sink in.

“You think what?” Sirius rasped, his throat sore from all the screaming he’d done.

“I think they had sex.”

“And you think this…why?”

“Her scent has changed, and there’s something different about them, about the way they are with each other,” Remus explained.

Sirius was silent for a long while and Remus let him be.

“Are you sure about this?” Sirius asked, rolling onto his side so he could cuddle into his lover.

“As sure as I can be without actually asking one of them,” Remus said, fingers playing with the long dark waterfall of his husband’s hair.

Sirius sighed and Remus waited patiently for his sweet puppy to calm his rising rage.

“And I can’t kill him?” Sirius questioned.

“No, she’d never forgive you.” Remus sighed. “Sirius, I don’t like it anymore than you do, I promise you that. But Nixie isn’t a baby, she is a grown woman, and we knew this day would come. We knew what we were letting ourselves in for when we adopted her. I don’t know what we can do about this, except be aware of it.”

Sirius didn’t have anything to say to that, so he suddenly surged upright, climbing over his husband to take his mouth in a bruising kiss, reaching down to stroke him.

“You think sex is the answer to all life’s problems,” Remus said before he threw his head back and moaned.

“Sex usually is the answer to a problem.”

Or, at least it took his mind off things for a while.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

The days drifted by in a pleasantly calm fashion. There were no new major developments, the usual letters and packages from Lucius, but nothing that would really worry anyone. Fred and George had taken over one of the basement rooms and were busy making things explode again, happily buying a whole army of owls to handle all the mail orders they were getting. People had taken to the new way of getting their products like ducks to water, and the boys were soon roping Remus and Sirius into helping them.

Sirius had decided that ignoring the fact that his daughter may or may not be having sex was the only way to deal with it without his head exploding, or him killing Charlie. Remus had, discreetly, taken Charlie aside and asked him, his heart sinking when his suspicions proved to be right. He had told the former Dragon Tamer in no uncertain terms that if Nixie ended up pregnant or hurt in any way, he wasn’t going to get between Charlie and Sirius. The redhead had nodded and sworn that Nixie was safe with him, in all considerations of the word.

Solarin was taking to her lessons with Mad Eye, and there had been no more little accidents to her skin.

Severus had discussed it with Molly and Arthur and the zoo trip had been postponed until the summer, when they knew for definite that Ron and Hermione could attend and see their children’s first foray into magical wildlife.

The ex-teacher had discreetly given Arthur the three birth certificates and a small bag of galleons and the father of seven had returned the precious pieces of paper two weeks later, along with three passports. They would be perfectly legal on muggle computer systems.

“Harry?” 

The young Gryffindor looked up from his potions essay into the dark eyes watching him.

“Do you remember how we were talking about the photographs in my album?”

He nodded.

“Well, how would you like to go on a trip?”

“You mean…like a holiday?”

“Yes, a holiday. Me, you and Miri.”

“What about Lucius?”

“Not a problem once we’re through passport control. We can go anywhere you like.”

“Really?” Harry said, a hesitant smile growing across his face. “Anywhere?”

“Anywhere you want. I got Solarin to pick these up,” he said, placing a stack of travel brochures in front of his lover. “Why don’t you have a look and let me know where you want to go.”

Harry ran his fingertips over the smooth covers. All those times the Dursley’s had told him he was a dirty little boy, that he didn’t deserve things like Dudley did, that freaks couldn’t have nice things like holidays. And now, here it was, everything he had wanted. People who loved him, a family, nice things like holidays, and new clothes and things that the Dursley’s considered pointless, like books and crafts and stuffed toys…

“Harry?” Severus asked, confused by the sudden tears in his lovers eyes. “What’s wrong, love? We don’t have to go away if you don’t want to.”

“No, you don’t understand. I do want it…I just…it’s…”

Severus reached out and pulled Harry into his arms, stroking his hair away from his eyes. “Come on, sweetheart, you can tell me.”

“You really want to spend all this money on me?”

Severus suppressed his violent tendencies, reminding himself once again that it would do no good to land himself in Azkaban for the murder of the Dursley’s. 

“If I could, I’d spend all the money in the world on you. You’re worth every last knut and penny.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Severus first noticed the stiffening of his husband beside him at the breakfast table, then the shudders that went through Miri and Solarin, and finally the tears that sprang, seemingly from nowhere, to Dorian’s eyes.

“Albus? What’s going on?” Sirius questioned.

The old wizard moved fully into the room, giving up his space in the doorway, which was then filled by a rather fat blond young man.

“What is he doing here?” Harry questioned, his grip on the table so tight it made his knuckles white.

“I’m not here to cause trouble, I swear,” the boy said, because he was really little more than a boy. “I need your help, I didn’t know who else to ask.”

“Who is he, Albus? Harry?” Remus asked. “I feel like I’m missing something.”

“This is Dudley Dursley,” Albus said, and a ripple of understanding went round the room.

Solarin reached out and unbuckled Dorian from his booster seat, letting the tiny boy burrow into her collarbone. Dudley’s eyes watched him, watched the two of them and his cheeks pinkened.

“Sit down,” Harry said. “If you’re going to ask for a favour, you might as well have some breakfast.”

Dudley took the seat he was directed to, and thanked Molly as politely as he could when she passed him a plate of bacon and eggs.

“So, what is it that you want from us?” Severus asked as the silence stretched.

“It’s Sophia. I swear I didn’t know, I swear it. But…”

“Spit it out,” Solarin snapped, her shirt soaked from Dorian’s tears.

“She gave birth to a baby girl this morning. She’s rejecting it, just like she did him.” He motioned to Dorian, who was peeking at him through Solarin’s long hair.

“You got her pregnant again?” Arthur asked incredulously. “After what she put Dorian through, after what your parents did to him…”

“She swore to me she was on the Pill!” he protested. “I wore condoms every time, I was careful even if she wasn’t! This isn’t my doing!”

“Enough!” Anne interrupted. “Stop throwing blame about. The point is that this girl got pregnant, again.”

“Why did she go through with the pregnancy if she didn’t want it?” Sam asked. “Surely a termination would have been kinder than this.”

“She told me she was going to…and then it just never happened,” Dudley said. “When I pressed her, she said she wanted another chance, another go at it. Said she was older now, said she could handle it. It seemed perfect. She got a flat of her own, got baby stuff, went to all the classes. Everyone said she was doing amazing. And then the baby arrived. She keeps saying things, how it’s not normal and all that, all the stuff she used to say about Dorian. I stood by and let it happen to him, and I’m not proud of that. I don’t want it to happen to another child. So I went to Mrs. Figg, got her to call Professor Dumbledore.”

“I have seen the infant,” Albus said. “She has the look of a witch about her, but I cannot be sure.”

“Solarin could be,” Bill said. “You can do that, right, baby? You can tell if this baby is magical?”

“I could, if I was in the room with her. But what if she is, what then?” she replied.

“Even if she isn’t, I can’t leave her with Sophia,” Dudley said. “She won’t even hold her.”

“What about you taking her? She is your daughter,” Harry said accusingly, holding his own daughter close.

“I’m going off to university in a few months, I can’t do that with a baby in tow. And I don’t want my parents to have her.” He sighed. “I didn’t want another baby, I made that clear to her. What happened to Dorian was bad enough, but another one? It’s not fair. She’s a tiny baby, she didn’t ask for any of this. I want her to have a good home, a family who love her. I…I want you to take her.”

There was stunned silence for a moment.

“Us?” Molly questioned. “You want us to take her?”

“Not you. Them,” he said, motioning to Bill and Solarin. “You took Dorian. You could take this one. A baby sister for him.”

The silence was deafening as the two looked at each other, conversation passing between them.

[We could,] Bill said. [I wanted to give you a baby.]

[Somehow, I don’t think this was quite the way you pictured it,] she countered, stroking their sons dark curls as conversation curled up around them. The family had descended into talking amongst themselves, giving the couple time to discuss.

[Well, it wasn’t the way I pictured it when we got Dor. Who’s to say that this baby won’t be just as amazing?]

She smiled. [You want this? Because I don’t want to take on a baby if we’re not sure.]

[I don’t think anyone’s ever completely sure about having a baby. But…I have a good feeling about this. And we know Dor wants a sibling.]

She chuckled. [I know it’s all he talks about, how he wants a brother or a sister like Daddy has.]

[I want to give him this. And we can, just by saying yes.]

“What about the authorities? Don’t they have something to say about this?” Solarin questioned Dudley.

“I have seen to it that we will get the chance to take care of this before they intervene,” Albus said. “I thought it would be wise to ask you first.”

“I can’t believe this,” Severus snarled. “You’re doing it again, you’re playing with us, with our lives. Why do you feel it acceptable to drag everyone in this family into your games?”

Everyone fell silent, watching Albus look at his old student with a look of pain.

“I never wished to play with you, Severus, it was never my intention,” Albus said quietly. “I am truly sorry that you feel I view you in such a way.”

“How could I not? You have sat by and done nothing while Harry was neglected and verbally abused by the Dursley’s, you did nothing when Sirius was sent to prison, you lied to Solarin and I about our father. Shall I go on, or do you need no more examples of your manipulation?”

“Severus, stop,” Harry said, catching his lips for a kiss. “This isn’t about me, or Sirius, or you. This is about a baby.”

“He’s right,” Molly said, glossing over the giant hippogriff in the room. “How about this? Solarin goes with Albus and Dudley to take a look at this baby. If Sophia consents, Solarin will bring the baby back here. We can decide the specifics later.”

They all agreed and Solarin passed Dorian to Bill, giving them both quick kisses, before following Albus and Dudley out. The bus ride to the hospital was an eternity without any conversation. The hospital was as cold and unfriendly a place as she had imagined it to be, as most hospitals were. Dudley mumbled that Sophia was on the eighth floor.

Solarin could hear the angry screaming of a young woman and the wails of a distressed baby long before they exited the elevator. She looked at Dudley.

“I told you she didn’t want her,” he said with a shrug.

As they entered the room, Solarin was struck by how much the crying baby looked like her little Dorian. Pale skin, curls (though these were a bright red), the same shape to the cheeks and chin. The tiny little girl was red-faced, her arms wide, as if she was screaming for someone to hold her.

The augur let her gaze fall on the furious looking young woman in bed, glaring at Dudley.

“Where the fuck have you been?” she spat at him. “I told you to take it away, I told you that, now fucking do it!”

“Sophia, this is Solarin. Her and her husband are the ones who took Dorian,” Albus said. Sophia locked her gaze with the witch.

“Good. You can take this one too.”

Solarin wasn’t quite sure what to say, so she strode forwards and picked up the baby. She was so terrified, the baby was so small and fragile looking. What if she dropped her? Immediately the ear-splitting shrieks stopped, the baby letting out a few hiccups before yawning, her blue eyes looking up at Solarin with such a surprised look about them that Solarin had to giggle.

“She’s beautiful,” Albus murmured in her ear as Mad-Eye slipped into the room. The old wizard reached out and stroked a tiny hand.

“I don’t care how beautiful it is, it’s not right,” Sophia spat. “Just like the other one, full of all that freakishness.”

Solarin clamped her tongue between her teeth and let her natural senses stretch outwards, drawing the child in. Ah, there is was, the bright spark deep in the baby, the magical core still developing. She pulled her magic back, leaving the fragile magical core as it was. What it needed was stability, not to be interfered with.

“Well?” Dudley questioned. “Is she?”

“Give Sol the chance,” Mad-Eye said, pulling out papers. “If you sign these, it will terminate your parental rights, leaving the baby free for adoption.” Sophia made a greedy grab for them and Mad-Eye held them out of her reach. “You have to mean this. Once you sign, it can’t be taken back. Once you sign, you give her up and never get another chance. You need to be sure.”

“I am sure,” the muggle woman spat. “I don’t want it. I don’t care what happens to it, so give me the fucking papers and get it out of here.”

At Albus’ nod, Mad-Eye handed the papers over. Sophia signed them and they disappeared with a pop. Dudley, however, wasn’t so quick to give up another child.

“She’ll be okay, right?” he asked quietly. “I mean, she’s going to a good home, isn’t she? You’ll love her and take care of her and all that…won’t you?”

“Of course,” Solarin said. “She’ll be safe and happy and loved, I swear it.” She paused. “She is a witch, Albus was right.”

Dudley stared for a moment at the baby in her arms before pulling his set of papers closer and signing them with a steady hand. They disappeared with a pop and he looked at the baby once more.

“Can I hold her before you take her?”

Solarin handed the baby over to him and let him walk a little way away. Her gaze fell on Sophia. 

“You know, people like you disgust me. How can you punish a child for something he or she has no control over?” she snarled.

“What the fuck would you know about it? You have no idea, I could have died bringing those kids into the world,” Sophia retaliated.

“And so that gives you the right to verbally abuse them? Because they don’t fit into some tiny box that can label them as normal? You’ve been blessed with two beautiful healthy children, without even trying, and yet you throw them away because they won’t fit into neat little categories? No, you’re worse than that, you verbally abuse them, neglect them, make them believe that there’s something fundamentally wrong with them because they’re different from you.”

Sophia glared at her. “At least I had my own kids instead of taking someone else’s,” she sneered.

Solarin realised the futility of arguing with her. Sophia was always going to turn it around to make herself feel better. She sighed and took the baby that Dudley was handing to her before following Albus out of the hospital.

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Harry found Severus curled up on their bed, staring out the window at the slowly falling snow. It didn’t show any signs of letting up, and no one was leaving the house unless they had to.

Harry climbed onto the bed behind him and nestled his chin in the crook of Severus’ neck, wrapping his arm over his waist.

“You can’t keep doing this, you know,” Harry murmured. “You can’t keep being angry at him.”

“Why not? Come on, tell me I’m wrong, that Albus hasn’t manipulated all of us in one way or another,” Severus replied.

“No, I’m not saying that you’re wrong. I’m just saying that this anger can’t be good for you. Severus, why focus on the past? It doesn’t help anyone,” Harry rationalised.

“I can’t help it,” Severus sighed. “I’m just so angry at him.”

“And there’s nothing wrong with the way you feel. I’m just saying that it’s doing no one any good to have this tension between the two of you, having you snapping at him all the time. How can you possibly forgive him if you don’t give him the chance to earn forgiveness?”

Severus rolled onto his back, looking up into the striking green eyes. 

“You can be very wise sometimes, do you know that?” he said, reaching up to tangle his fingers in Harry’s messy locks.

“It’s just the truth,” the Gryffindor murmured, his cheeks going pink.

Severus reached up and pulled Harry into a scorching kiss, slipping his tongue between pliant lips, tangling with the tongue seeking his. He felt himself harden as Harry climbed astride him, feeling Harry’s hardness pressing into his abdomen. His hands slid down, fingertips finding the hem of Harry’s jumper, pulling at the t-shirt beneath and growling at the vest.

“Damnable clothing!” he snarled and Harry giggled.

“We can’t do anything, anyways,” he said, sitting up, making Severus whine and try to pull him back down.

“Why not?” he asked petulantly.

“Because your sister is about to return with a brand new baby, and we have nothing for it. No clothes, nowhere for it to sleep. What about bottles and formula? A baby has to eat.”

“Send someone to get that stuff then, and we can get back to…”

“But I wanted to go.”

Severus froze, protests rising to his lips before he could stop them.

“Don’t,” Harry demanded. “Don’t tell me how dangerous it is. I know that. Don’t tell me how you only want me to be safe, I know that too. I’ll be with you, and we won’t be long. Just a few shops, get the things for the baby, and a trip to a bookshop, and then home.”

“Bookshop? Are there not enough tomes in the house for you?”

“There are plenty of books, but not on the subject I want. And I’ll even let you drag me into that potions supply shop that you love so much.”

Severus was silent for a while and then he sighed. “You promise to let me hover?”

“I promise.”

“And Miri?”

“Well…I would leave her with Molly or Nana or someone, but Mad-Eye says I can’t. He says she’s too young, that until she’s at least a year, her abilities won’t handle me being not in the same building as her.”

“When did he say this?” Severus couldn’t keep the surprise out of his voice.

“I asked him yesterday if I could go out without her. He said she’s not ready, that she’ll use her abilities to try and find me and it’ll stretch her further than she’s ready for, that it’ll do her damage.”

“Well, that changes things…What did you want a book on?”

“Vegan.”

“Being a vegan, or just what it is?”

“Both. Sam was talking to Remus and they used the word vegan. What is it?”

“A vegan is a person, someone who practices veganism, which is abstaining from the use of and consumption of animal products.”

“Can I have that in English?” Harry said with a smile.

Severus chuckled. “I’ve taught a few, two or three were Slytherin’s. I don’t claim to be an expert, but as I understand it, vegans don’t eat meat, milk, butter, cheese, eggs, fish of any kind. They don’t consume any milk derived product, such as yogurts or ice cream. Nothing from an animal in any way. The ones I taught wouldn’t even consider anything with honey in, they had their uniform items specially made so they didn’t contain wool, wouldn’t wear leather shoes, wouldn’t use quills made from feathers gathered by killing the birds, only ones that had been shed. It’s quite rare in the Wizarding world, not so rare in the Muggle world.”

“Oh.” Harry was silent, working it all through. “Why did they do it?”

“Most were because they were against animal suffering. A couple were for health reasons, something about the allergens in milk and hormones in meat. I must admit, I didn’t pay much attention, other than to ensure they actually had something on the Slytherin table that they could eat. Albus and I had to liaise with the House Elves quite extensively over that one. They got quite confused, kept putting eggs in things.”

“And they could live on a no-animal diet?”

“They prefer it called plant-based, and yes, they lived quite well on it. They were all quite healthy. As I remember, none of them ever caught a cold or some other bug. I could be wrong, but they seemed healthier than most of my other students.”

“Well, I thought a book on it might be a good thing. You keep telling me that if I want to know about things then a book is the first place I should go to find out,” Harry reasoned.

Severus saw the look of excitement in Harry’s eyes and pushed down his own reservations. Harry wasn’t a prisoner, he had done nothing wrong, he should be able to pop to the shops when he wanted to.

“All right, love. Go get your boots on, I’ll get Miri’s baby bag ready.”

Harry took his breath away with a deep kiss and then scampered off the bed, making Severus chuckle. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to calm down. It would be okay, he told himself. One little shopping trip wouldn’t be the end of the world.

He used all he knew about Lucius to reassure himself. Lucius hated the cold, he remembered the blond as practically hibernating during the winter months, so the snow and wind would put him off. And (Severus could feel the smile spreading across his face) if he and Harry went shopping in the Muggle world, Lucius would be nowhere to be seen. Lucius had a deep seated hatred of anything Muggle.

Harry was carefully putting Miri into her little snowsuit when Severus entered the kitchen. Sirius drew him aside. 

“Are you sure about this?” he asked worriedly. “What about Lucius?”

“Lucius hates the Muggle world. Harry will be fine.” He looked over to his husband. “Ready, love?” he called.

“Ready,” Harry replied with a huge grin. “I thought it might be better to strap her into the pram at the bottom of the steps.”

“I’ve got a blanket to wrap her in, and nappies and wipes. All we need is some nibbles for her and my coat, and we’re good to go.” He made his way over to the cut up fruit on standby for Miri and dropped some apple pieces and grapes into a small plastic box before slipping it into the bag, and grabbing a baby bottle of water from the fridge.

Harry was bouncing Miri, holding out his coat to him and he chuckled. The rest of the family looked worried; Severus and Harry had never gone out without some kind of escort.

“Will you all please take a breath?” Severus said as he pulled on his coat and took Miri, Harry moving away to unfold Miri’s buggy. “We’ll be fine. When Solarin comes back, tell her where we’ve gone.”

And, with that, he and Harry made their way out the door.

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Harry walked along proudly pushing Miri, flushing with happiness at every smile that was given to her. They were in Wood Green in Haringey, on their way to the Mall. It was a huge indoor assortment of over 130 shops. No matter what they could think of to get for the new baby, they were sure to find it there.

“Can we have lunch out?” Harry asked.

“Of course. We can go anywhere you want, love. Baby stuff first, though.”

Harry nodded and let Severus guide him through the automatic doors and along the wide hallways. They passed a Boots, a Sports Direct, a Claire’s Accessories. Severus indulged him in a browse around Evolution, which was full of trinkets and fragile looking things and the smell of incense. They took a look around Tiger, where Harry bought himself a sketchpad, a pair of slippers, a string of battery operated heart shaped lights, a puppet show theatre for the playroom and a whole rainbow of scented candles.

New Look was their next shop, where they both went a little mad. Severus came away with seven pairs of jeans, two hoodies, three jumpers, eight t-shirts, a sea of socks and boxers, pyjamas, slippers, four belts, a scarf, a pair of gloves, and a brand new coat. Harry took a little reassurance, that no one would judge him, that it was perfectly acceptable for a hermaphrodite to wear pink and frills if they wanted to. After he calmed down, Harry filled two baskets, Severus chuckling at his excitement. Harry came away with overflowing carrier bags, containing such things as a pink Sleepy from Snow White wristwatch, panda earmuffs, printed t-shirts from the men’s and women’s sections, jeans and slippers, not to mention underwear and other things.

“Is it bad that we just bought so much for ourselves when we’re meant to be shopping for the baby?” Harry asked as they made their way towards an emporium of girly delights.

“No,” Severus said without hesitation. “We’ve never gone out like this, just you and I. Why not enjoy it. Now, which hairclips do you like best?”

Harry followed Severus around the shop, looking at the different hairbands and hairclips and various other things on offer, trying to decide which would look prettiest in Miri’s dark curls. They had started to fall into her eyes and she was getting annoyed by them.

“She’s beautiful.”

Harry looked around from his contemplation of some clips with bows on to find one of the shop assistants smiling at Miri.

“Thank you,” he said.

“How old is she?”

“Almost ten months.”

“Have you seen our deal on ear piercing?”

“Ear piercing?” Harry asked weakly, afraid that he knew exactly where this was headed.

Severus began to make his way across the shop, dropping the flower shaped clips onto a random display that he passed. Pierce his daughters ears? The poor little thing wasn’t even a year old yet, she hadn’t even mastered standing on her own yet. She was far too young for jewelry.

“All our starter kits have stainless steel backs, and there’s a wide range to choose from. Our prices start at £15. We’re the ear piercing specialists.”

“I don’t think-”

“It’s painless, she won’t feel a thing. Tiny little pinch and then, done,” she barreled on and Harry looked up at Severus, shaking his head.

“I don’t think so,” Severus said.

“I’m sorry, sir, but I was discussing this with another customer.”

“You were talking about sticking a piece of metal through our daughter’s ears. I’m sorry, but it’s not going to happen,” Severus said.

“Your daughter?” she echoed, looking between the three Potter-Snape’s. 

“Yes, OUR daughter,” Severus repeated.

“But…but you’re both men.”

“Your point?” Harry asked testily.

“He’s old!” she exclaimed, motioning at Severus. 

Severus slipped his arm across Harry’s chest. “I think it’s time we were going, love,” he said. “I don’t think our baby needs anything from here after all. We’ll go find another shop, with assistants that have manners.”

They dropped the things they had already picked up and strode from the shop, Harry seething inside the whole way. His mood was consistently dark until Severus guided him into the baby department of Primark. Harry brightened considerably as his lover gave him free reign to pick out as many vest, socks, onesies, booties, hats and blankets as he liked. Severus noticed a few items clearly meant for Miri made their way into their basket, but he said nothing. Miri’s wardrobe was full of clothes that other people had bought, and things Harry had ordered on catalogues. The sprite had never gotten the chance to shop for his own baby before, and he saw no reason not to indulge him.

After paying for their three baskets of clothes, Severus walked Harry to the bathrooms and reassured him that he would be waiting right there when he was finished. Harry leaned in and kissed him before taking the baby bag and Miri and disappearing into the mother and baby bathroom to change her nappy. Severus looked around before crouching down and making a show of readjusting the bags, subtly casting a spell to shrink it all to fit in one of the bags.

Their next stop was Wilkinsons, where they picked up a sterilizer, bottles, formula, nappies, wipes, powder, shampoo, and all manner of other things that a baby could need. They waited patiently while one of the shop assistants disappeared into the back to get the pram and Moses basket they had requested. Before long, they had paid and were trying to decide what to eat.

“How about that place?” Severus said, motioning to a Burger King while wrestling with the plastic tag on the rag doll Miri has squealed for in the shop.

“Peas,” the tiny girl said, reaching out to it. “Peas, Dada.”

“Just a moment, sweetheart, just a moment,” he reassured as he managed to snap the binding plastic. “There we go.”

She giggled as he handed it to her, giggling and hugging it around the neck, her little fingers finding the ruffles on the dolls dress sleeves. 

Severus found he was glad that they had managed to stow the monster truck she had also fallen in love with under the pram before she had demanded it. It wouldn’t have fit in the seat with her.

Harry found a table and dragged over a highchair while Severus got their food and then he found a strange delight in watching Miri take apart her burger, sucking on the bun and trying to get her new dolly to eat her fries.

“I’m glad we did this,” Harry murmured, reaching over to wipe ketchup off of Miri’s nose.

Severus felt instant guilt. “You shouldn’t feel so glad for something so small,” he said. “I should take you out more often. This shouldn’t be such a rarity.”

“But you know why I don’t go out very often,” Harry said, nibbling on an onion ring. “It’s not just Lucius. I don’t like being the centre of attention, no matter what the papers say.”

Out of habit, Severus glanced around to ensure they weren’t being overheard.

Harry took a sip of his coke, reaching over to hand Miri her bottle of water. “We’re almost finished. You want anything else?”

“Not that I can think of.” Severus glanced up at the menu’s above the servers heads. “How about an ice cream?”

“Ice cream sounds great, but I was actually talking about shopping,” Harry said with a giggle. “Are there any more places we need to go?”

“Ah. Well, you wanted a book, didn’t you? We might be able to get it in the WHSmith downstairs.”

“Okay.”

They finished eating and made their way down in the lift, Severus content to let Harry browse to his heart’s content in WHSmith. They found a book on veganism to answer Harry’s questions, and then wandered over to the kids department.

“Severus?”

“Hmmm?”

“Do you want more children?”

Severus looked up from the picture book he was looking at. He had been trying to decide if it would be something Dorian would like.

“Of course I do,” he said. “If they’re anything like Miri, I’d like as many as we can produce. But I thought you didn’t want any more just yet.”

“I would like to graduate before being pregnant again, I’m not gonna lie about it. Studying was hard while pregnant.”

“I remember all the times you made things explode,” Severus said with a smirk.

“Rub it in,” Harry said. “You know, Mad-Eye thinks it might have been Miri doing that, that somehow her magical core was affecting mine.”

“Makes sense, seeing how powerful she is, it wouldn’t surprise me.” Severus plucked another book from the shelf, glancing at the back of it. “Harry, do you want more children soon?”

“I think I do. I want to give you one of your own.”

“Miri is mine,” Severus said. “I will never think of her in any other way. She is my daughter.”

“But…I mean…well, don’t you want one of your blood?”

“Blood is just a liquid, Harry.”

“But I want one we made together.”

It all clicked into place in Severus’ head. “You want one made out of love, instead of the way Miri happened.”

“Yes. Is…is that wrong?” Harry questioned. “I love Miri, more than anything.” He looked down at the little girl twiddling with the bows in her doll’s hair. “I wouldn’t change her for anything. But…I want one I have no doubts about keeping. I want one we made together.”

“Then we’ll aim for that when we try, and enjoy practicing in the meantime.”

“I was thinking…what about if we started trying for another baby after I graduate?”

“That sounds like a good plan.”

“So, we’re going to try?” The excitement in Harry’s voice was impossible to mistake.

“As soon as you’ve left school, we’ll try for another baby.”

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Bill could feel the nerves coming off his wife in waves, and the excitement in the tiny squirming boy in his arms. 

“Can I hold the baby?” Dorian asked, looking around at his gathered family members.

“Of course you can, baby,” Solarin said. “Sit on someone’s lap and you can hold her.”

Dorian wriggled until Bill put him down and clambered up onto Remus’ lap, grinning as his mother came forwards with the baby. She placed the tiny girl in Dorian’s arms, Remus’ arms coming around to hold both baby and toddler steady. 

“What do you think, buddy?” Bill asked. “Can she stay?”

Dorian contemplated the baby. She was small and warm and felt good to cuddle like this. “I ‘apose,” he said. “Will she call you mummy and daddy too?”

“I don’t know,” Solarin said. “How would you feel about that?”

“I guess that would be okay,” he declared. “And I get to be her big brudder, like daddy has brudders?”

“Yes, you’d get to be her big brother.”

“Then she can stay. Can Uncle Fwed play twains wiv me?”

“Of course,” Fred said as Solarin picked up the baby again. “Come on, little dude.”

Dorian scampered off with Fred following him and Solarin sat down at the table, looking down at the baby in her arms. 

In the hour since she had picked up the baby at the hospital, Solarin had come to feel comfortable with the slight weight in her arms. It felt different than when she held Miri, or Catherine, or Joseph. When she held them it was a good weight in her arms but she didn’t feel the spark that she felt now. It felt the way it did when she held Dorian, like some small piece of her had fallen into place, that she was complete now, without even knowing she was missing something.

“I know what you’re thinking,” Bill sing-songed into her ear, reaching out to stroke one flaming curl on the baby’s head.

“Well, we are linked,” she replied.

“I don’t need to look in your head, it’s written all over your face.” He chuckled as she busied herself with straightening the sleeve of the white onesie, her pale cheeks tinted slightly pink. “So…what do you want to name her?”

“I…haven’t the slightest clue,” she said with a giggle. 

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Severus carried Miri into the kitchen, only to have Molly pluck the baby out of his arms and the witch push him back out the door. He looked over his shoulder to see Remus chuckling.

“Harry is waiting for you in the dining room,” Remus said. “He said he wanted you all to himself, so we’ll take care of Miri for tonight.”

The Potions Master hesitated for a moment, watching as Miri squealed and babbled at Sirius as he strapped her into her highchair, clapping as Sam brought her bowl over. He took a deep breath before walking away, leaving her to someone else’s care. He paused in the door of the dining room, nervous as to what he’d find. 

As far as he knew, the dining room was a room that no one liked. It had too many associations to Voldemort and the Death Eaters. Severus himself had attended a few meetings in this room. It had been shut up the entire time Severus had lived in this house, aside from the few occasions Nixie used the wide windows to watch the rain.

As he opened the door, Severus was stuck by the pure beauty of what lay before him. Diaphanous cloths in every shade of blue he could imagine lay draped over every bulky piece pushed against the walls; candles sat on every available surface, their flickering light casting warm shadows on the walls, masking any flaws in the scene. The main dining table, something designed to seat 16, was ignored, in favour of a smaller table for two sitting under the window.

It was here that he found sight of his little husband. Harry was dressed in his best tailored black jeans and slim fitting green shirt, the one that Severus loved him in. On the table Harry was setting the finishing touches to what looked like toad in the hole with mashed potatoes and gravy.

“Harry?”

The little brunet looked at him and bestowed him with a dazzling smile. “You’re right on time,” Harry praised. “Miri with Remus?”

“Yes. Harry…what am I right on time for?”

“Our anniversary dinner,” he said simply, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

“Anniversary,” Severus breathed, feeling guilt tug at him. He had completely forgotten, and, subsequently, had not done anything, not even a gift.

“You forgot,” Harry said, his green eyes glittering with amusement as he took Severus’ hand and pulled him into the room, casting his wand at the door as it slipped shut, assuring that they would be neither disturbed or overheard. 

“Sorry,” Severus mumbled, feeling like an errant schoolboy who had forgotten his homework.

Harry pulled him down into a possessive kiss, Severus surrendering to the ravishment.

“I forgive you,” Harry whispered against his lips. “I made you dinner, your favourite.”

“I see. You made all of this all on your own?”

“Yes,” he replied, leading the taller man to the small table. “I wanted to do something special.”

“And now I feel worse that I forgot,” Severus muttered and Harry’s smile froze. “Oh, love, I didn’t mean that I don’t adore what you’ve done. I just wish I’d remembered, done something just as special for you.”

“Well, you can do something special after dinner…in bed,” Harry said, as blunt as Severus had ever heard him and still a shiver went through him at the possessive tone. 

“Absolutely.”

It turned out that Harry had made a full three-course meal from scratch, without so much as a knife being handed to him. The only thing he had had some help with was getting the ingredients, which Charlie had done for him.

The starter was grilled scallops with a light salad, the main was the toad in the hole with mash and gravy, and the desert was a decadent chocolate mousse. 

Severus leaned back in his seat and moaned his appreciation. It was late in the night, and he was sure everyone else had made it to bed already, but he and Harry were in no rush. It was their first marriage anniversary, why rush? No, they would take their sweet time. Several bottles of expensive fruit juice lay discarded, and Severus found that he hadn’t minded in the slightest that they were not alcohol. 

Severus smiled as Harry flicked his wand at the wireless in the corner, a slow soothing melody floating to them. Severus rounded the table and pulled Harry up into his arms, leading him into an open area of the room and began to slowly turn with him. Harry rested his head on his chest, hearing the strong steady heartbeat under his cheek. 

“Harry?”

“Hmmm?”

“Are you happy…with me?”

“Happy? Of course I’m happy with you,” Harry replied without hesitation. “I love you.”

Severus smiled to himself, pressing a kiss to the wild dark tresses beneath his chin. “I love you too.”

They danced for what seemed to be hours, Severus stealing kisses every now and then, his hands roaming from a very respectable spot on Harry’s waist, to his back, then his hips and then finally sliding down to cup the pert little buttocks. 

“Severus…”

“Mmmmm?”

Harry reached up and pulled Severus down into a kiss, making the older man’s toes curl in pleasure as his tongue forced its way into his mouth, tangling with his own. Before he could blink, Severus had backed the little Gryffindor up against the wall, his hand fumbling around to try and find the doorframe so he could find the handle. While they had made love in many rooms of the house, tonight was special, and he decided that the occasion called for their bed.

It took a rather long time to get up the stairs, what with all the stops along the way for kisses and touches, caresses and gropes. They finally made it to their room and managed to get the door closed and the necessary spells in place before Severus pulled Harry close and busied himself with removing the clothes getting between his hands and Harry’s skin. 

He peppered the pale skin with kisses, licking where he knew would make Harry writhe and moan, nipping where it would cause the sprite to jerk as pleasure shot through him. Severus admired the sight of Harry lying naked on their bed for a moment before ducking down and engulfing as much of Harry’s straining erection in his mouth as he could, using his hand to stroke the rest of the thick shaft, the fingers of his other hand slipping down to weigh Harry’s testicles, the angle allowing him to caress the elfin beauty’s clit with the very tip of his finger. 

Harry lost himself, went mindless with the pleasure until his world exploded and his release shot down Severus’ throat.

Severus pulled back, licking his lips and looking over the shaking form on the bed. He used the distraction climax had brought to Harry to disrobe, leaving his clothes in a careless pile by the bed. He retrieved the lube from the bedside cabinet and crawled onto the bed, curling himself around the relaxed form of his lover.

“Mmmm,” Harry hummed when his senses returned. “That was wicked.”

“Indeed,” Severus agreed, dipping his head to nibble at Harry’s neck, the younger man tilting his head back to allow further exploration. Harry was as still as he could be for a little while, and then he grew tired of Severus’ teasing and took matters into his own hands, he reached down and took Severus in hand, making the older man cry out in strangled pleasure as Harry teased the head of his cock with the tip of a finger, just the slightest pressure.

“Harry…fuuuuuuck…please, love!” Severus cried and Harry giggled.

“Please, what?”

“I don’t know! Something, anything!”

Harry leaned in and slipped a gentle kiss from the slack lips before smiling at his lover.

“You wanted to do something special for me, yes?”

“Yes.”

“Then…I want you to take me like this.”

Severus released Harry from his hold and watched as Harry turned onto his side, looking over his shoulder at him. Severus stared at him in awed silence as he took in the sight. A long pale back, round hairless buttocks, silky thighs.

Severus moulded himself to his lovers back, dipping his head to kiss his neck.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. I want it this way. We’ve never tried it this way before, and Tonks’ magazine said it was a gentle position.”

“It’s not wrong,” Severus agreed. “In this position, I have no choice but to be gentle. Are you sure you want tender?”

“Yes, this time I want tender.”

Nothing more was said as Severus coated himself in lube, squeezing out more of the slick gel onto his fingers before reaching down to carefully caress his lovers silken inner walls, spreading the lube as he went.

When he was sure that Harry was as ready as he could be, he slowly eased himself into the tight welcoming heat, sighing as he was fully seated, feeling Harry reach back to tangle fingers in his hair. They were still for what seemed to be both an eternity and not long enough at all.

Slowly, Severus began to move, hearing Harry’s quiet moan. He slipped his arm under Harry’s neck so he could hold him closer, his other hand going down to grip the sharp rise of Harry’s hip. The sprite had pushed his knee forwards, opening himself as much as he could in such a position, trying to push back into the thrusts and finding how hard it was. He was at Severus’ mercy, and he reveled in it.

There was no other way for their lovemaking to go other than slowly. It had never been a position that Severus had considered very thrilling. He still had the intense pleasure of joining with Harry, still had the satisfaction of knowing that Harry gained pleasure from their union. 

But he hated being restricted in such a way.

Harry sighed at the gentle thrusts and tried to be patient as he waited for Severus to speed up, the way Harry loved him to do. But it didn’t come, and Harry felt himself grow frustrated with his lover for making him wait, until he realized that Severus couldn’t speed up, not with a hip planted on the mattress.

“Severus.”

“Yes, love,” Severus replied, pausing in his thrusts.

“I don’t like it.”

Severus pulled out as quickly as he could without causing pain. He rolled Harry onto his back and tried to squash his rising panic.

“It’s all right, love, it’s all right,” he soothed, gathering the young man into his arms.

Harry giggled. “I know it is, that’s not what I meant.” Severus pulled back slightly so their eyes could meet.

“It’s not? But…Harry, I don’t understand.”

“The position, I don’t like the position.”

Severus chuckled and leant in to sip a heated kiss from the swollen lips. “Too gentle and slow?”

“Much too slow,” Harry agreed. 

He reached out and grabbed Severus shoulders, wrestling him to his back before climbing astride him and sinking down onto his hard length with a sigh. After a moment, he placed his hands on Severus’ chest and began to move, harder and faster with each moment that passed. 

Severus let his hands grip Harry’s knees, feeling the smooth, scarred skin under his fingertips as his hands slid up the white thighs to the slim hips in a lovers caress. Severus managed to get himself sitting so he could kiss his lover as Harry rode him in fluid beautiful arching. He let himself go in the heat around him, the arms of his little lover wrapped around his neck. 

It was over far too soon for Severus’ liking, but probably soon enough for his sanity. If Harry kept on the way he was, Severus would never let him leave this bed, let alone the room.

They exploded in a rush of heat, Harry climaxing first and pulling Severus with him. They collapsed in a pile of sweaty limbs, fusing their mouths together, finding they needed connection far more than they wanted air. But, eventually, the need for air overrode all the rest and they let their lips part.

“I must say, I think we should have an anniversary every night,” Severus said and Harry giggled.


	10. Chapter Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so so so so so so incredibly sorry this took so long. Other things got in the way (life), other plot bunnies took hold (Hydra's Golden Egg), but it is finally time for a new chapter.
> 
> Everybody ready to check in on our favourite witches and wizards?
> 
> I really hope you enjoy this.

Lucius missed the Manor. He missed his comfortable life. He had lived it so long that he wasn’t sure of himself here.

 

He and his companions were living in little more than a shack on the Yorkshire moors, trying not to get arrested and still trying to have it their way.

 

Why shouldn’t he have his own way? He was Lucius Abraxus Malfoy, born of the highest Pureblood pedigree. He had spent his life being waited on and catered to. His childhood had been lavishly comfortable, even when he had reached Hogwarts. His father had used large sums of money to clear the way for any problems Lucius might have encountered, be them big or small.

 

What Lucius hadn’t known is that his father also spent extortionate amounts of money on a gambling problem, accruing debt he couldn’t dismiss. A mild case of Dragon Pox, something that potions should have been able to cure, had killed his father in a matter of hours, leaving Lucius with the fallout of his problems.

 

The blond walked into the ‘bedroom’, the room he had secured as his own, to find Bellatrix waiting on his bed.

 

 

Bella had lost many things also. Her family, her husband, her wealth. Her mind. He remembered when they were young, how vibrant she had been. Once upon a time he had argued with his father over his betrothal to Narcissa. He had much preferred Bellatrix. But his father had won that argument, and, looking at her sanity now, Lucius was glad of it.

 

“Come to bed,” she said. “I’m bored.”

 

Lucius smirked and began to shed his clothes. She might not be his sweet Harry, she might be as barren as the Sahara, but she was a warm willing body that didn’t expect him to be tender, so things could be worse.

 

Soon enough, all his plans would come to fruition, and he would have his sweet pet writhing beneath him once more.

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Stunned silence met Severus’ announcement and he shared a smirk with Solarin.

 

“What?” Remus said.

 

“I just told you that I have booked a vacation for Harry, Miri and myself. We leave on the twentieth of April,” Severus repeated.

 

Another stunned silence and Severus was rather glad that Harry had disappeared with Miri as soon as lunch had finished. He dreaded to think of how Harry would take the silence.

 

“You can’t,” Molly said. “You can’t take them away.”

 

“Why not?” Severus asked. “Why can I not take my husband and daughter on a holiday?”

 

“Severus, be reasonable,” Sirius said. “It’s not safe. How do you expect to keep them safe?”

 

“Lucius cannot leave England, and he is not smart enough to ever consider that Harry may leave the country. Harry and Miri will be safe.”

 

“But what if he does figure it out?” Remus questioned.

 

“He can’t leave England, the boarders are closed to him,” Solarin said. “The Muggle authorities are aware that there is a dangerous criminal on the loose, they’re on guard for him.”

 

“He could use a potion or spell to change his appearance,” Arthur pointed out.

 

“We’ve taken steps against that,” Tonks said. “We have Aurors posted at every airport, train station and coach station, not to mention the boarder crossing between Dover and Calais and the new one at Kings Cross. If Harry leaves the country, Lucius can’t follow.”

 

They looked around at each other.

 

“This might be a stupid thing to ask…but what about Miri?” Bill questioned. “All those Muggle minds…is it okay for her to travel?”

 

“It’s fine,” Solarin assured. “I’ve never had any problems, she shouldn’t either.” She sighed. “Your concerns are all good concerns, ones that you should have. But we’ve already thought of them. We’re ready for all eventualities.”

 

“You’re right,” Remus said. “We do trust you, Severus, truly. It’s just…”

 

“I know, old friend,” Severus said. “I know exactly where you’re coming from.” He reached for his wand, summoning a bottle of wine and some glasses, pouring himself one and then motioning for the others to help themselves. “They left him, Remus. Those fucking bastards who dared call themselves his family left him with Arabella Figg while they went and lived it up on holiday. Remus, he’s never been away, never had anything new from them, they always made him feel like a dirty little boy who deserved to be neglected, who deserved nothing from them.”

 

“But…Harry talked about their holidays,” Molly said.

 

“Exactly. Their holidays, not his. They didn’t take him with them. Molly, why shouldn’t Harry have a holiday? Why shouldn’t I take him away for a week? Everyone else gets to have this, why shouldn’t he?”

 

“Of course he should,” Charlie said. “We’re just cautious. None of us wants anything to happen to Harry or Miri.”

 

“I would never put them in danger, I swear it,” Severus said. “But I do love him, and I want him to have everything I can give him. That includes things like holidays.”

 

“This might be the last thing on everyone’s minds, but what about the exams?” Sam asked. “This holiday would interrupt the revision schedule.”

 

“One of the glorious things about home-schooling: Harry and Nixie are both as ready as they’re going to get,” Remus said. “At this point, if they don’t know it, then they don’t know it. And a break might do Harry some good. He can relax, get some rest, some time away from all the stresses he faces here. It’ll refresh him for the exams.”

 

“So, where are you going?” Nixie asked. “I think he’d like France.”

 

“You mean you like France,” Sirius said with a grin. “After the exams me and Remus will take you away somewhere.”

 

She leaned in and hugged him, her pale cheeks rosy.

 

“We’re going to Mallorca, to a little place called Cala Bona,” Severus said and Solarin grinned. “I took Solarin there once when she was small. If they can handle her, Miri should be no trouble.

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

“Caya. Dada. Caya.”

 

Harry awoke to the pitch dark of his bedroom at the sound of a tiny voice calling for him. He sat up slightly and looked over the edge of the mattress to find Miri standing by the side of the bed, her tiny hands fisted in the sheet.

 

“Severus,” he called, the man waking immediately at his tone. Harry reached down and plucked Miri up, cuddling her close as she snuggled into him. “She’s hot.”

 

Severus reached over and placed a palm to her forehead, pushing back the blankets so he could stand.

 

“I’m going to get Sam,” he said, sliding on his slippers and heading from the room.

 

Harry felt his heart racing. Something was wrong with his baby, his precious baby girl.

 

“Caya.”

 

“I’m here, baby. Carrier’s right here,” he murmured.

 

“Et.”

 

“Wet? You need a change? Okay, baby, let’s go do that, okay. Come on, here we go,” he soothed as he stood up and padded from the room. He turned on the low level lamp on the dresser and made his way to the changing table. “How did you even get out of your cot, baby? Down we go, that’s it, good girl.”

 

He laid her on the changing mat and pulled off her pyjama bottoms, unpopping her vest, all the while keeping up a string of soothing words. Her little cheeks were flushed with her fever and he momentarily bit his lip as he panicked. Panic would not help him.

 

“Harry!”

 

“In here,” he called at Severus’ panic filled cry. The potions master entered in a hurry, Sam on his heels. “She says she’s wet.”

 

Harry pulled open the tabs and froze. “That’s not wet.”

 

“No, that’s diarrhoea,” Sam said. “Just clean her up and I’ll take a look at her.”

 

Harry did as he was told, securing her into a fresh nappy, putting her back into her little pyjamas before letting Sam pick her up, carrying her from the room. Harry followed, Severus’ gentle hand on his back.

 

They made their way to Sam and Tonks’ bedroom, where the tiny witch was laid on the bed. Tonks sleepily watched the proceedings as Harry and Severus hovered by the bed.

 

Sam took her temperature via her ear, and listened to her chest and then he handed her to Harry, motioning him to sit on the bed.

 

“Harry, can you get her to say ah for me? I need a look at the back of her throat.”

 

“Miri. Say ah for Sam. Come on, baby. Ah!”

 

She whimpered and snuggled in, clutching at his sleeve. Severus squatted down, getting on her level.

 

“Miri,” he called. “Ah!” he demonstrated. “Miri do it. Ah!”

 

“Ah,” she said, reaching tiredly for the penlight Sam was using to look at the back of her throat.

 

Tonks managed to pass Severus a towel as Miri vomited with spectacular volume and distance. Harry held her close, soothing her, as Sam summoned a bottle of water for her. She drank tentatively, trying to push it way as it slid down her sore throat.

 

“Come on, Miri,” Harry urged. “Just a little more, sweetheart. That’s my good girl.”

 

Sam rummaged through his bag for a few vials of potion, handing them to Severus with a small syringe to apply them orally.

 

“Bout of flu, nothing more,” he said. “She’ll be fine, she just needs rest and fluids. Those vials have pain relievers and something to keep her salts up while she’s got an upset tummy.”

 

“Will those make it go away?” Harry questioned, nodding at the potions.

 

“No, they’ll just make her feel a bit better while she fights this off. I know this is hard, but she needs to catch these things,” Sam said. “Every bug she fights off makes her immune system that little bit stronger. She needs this, Harry.”

 

“So what do I do?” the Gryffindor asked after a moment.

 

“Plenty of fluids, don’t worry so much about food for today. If you can get her to eat, that’s great, but if her throat is too sore for it, nursing should be fine enough for today. Pain relievers every four to six hours, and a dose of rehydration salts every time you change a nappy like the one you just changed. Other than that, just lots of cuddles and rest.”

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Severus hovered in the doorway of the nursery with a tray in his hands and watched Harry.

 

The little brunet was snuggling a miserable Miri in the rocking chair, his slim fingers toying with her curls as she clung to him.

 

“I brought you some lunch,” Severus said as he made his way across the room. On his tray was a bowl of peach slices, a bowl of peach puree, a baby bottle of water and a glass of strawberry milkshake.

 

“I’m not hungry,” Harry said. Severus sighed and set the tray down atop the dresser, moving to seat himself on the footstool.

 

“It’s just the flu, love,” he soothed, stroking Harry’s knee. “She will be fine, I promise you.”

 

“I know.”

 

“Then…would you like to share your thoughts with me?”

 

Harry was silent for a moment, his green eyes locked on the world outside the window, the burning weight of Miri in his arms.

 

“I don’t remember this,” he mumbled.

 

“Remember what?”

 

“This. I don’t remember ever having someone do this for me when I was sick.”

 

Severus was stunned silent. Just when he thought he knew all there was to know about his lovers sorry excuse for a childhood, Harry dropped another bomb.

 

“Did you get sick very often?” he questioned; it took everything he had to keep his tone light.

 

“I guess.”

 

“What sort of illnesses? Did you have the flu?”

 

“I think so. I got colds, like the other kids at school, and bumps and bruises, nothing serious.” Severus bit his tongue. “I don’t think I ever got really sick. Chicken pox maybe. And the mumps.”

 

“Mumps? You had mumps?”

 

Harry nodded, finally looking at him. “I was all swollen around my neck and my joints hurt and Aunt Petunia was scared I’d infect Dudley.”

 

“Harry,” Severus began, a sinking feeling in his stomach. “Do you remember those jabs Sam had to give Miri?” Harry nodded. “You remember us explaining to you that she had to have them, that they would make her immune system stronger?” Another nod. “Harry, did you ever have jabs when you were a child?”

 

“I don’t think so.”

 

“Not even at school?”

 

“I’m not sure,” he said. “Why?”

 

“Because, if you didn’t have your childhood immunisations, you would be at risk of all those illnesses, your immune system could be compromised, and you could get very sick.”

 

“Could I make Miri sick?”

 

“You might. We need Sam to test you.”

 

He pressed a kiss to Harry’s forehead before he sped from the room, returning a few moments later with Sam, Remus and Sirius trailing behind him. Sam came forwards and crouched beside Harry’s seat, pressing a hand to Miri’s forehead.

 

“She’s a little cooler now,” he said, smiling up at Harry. “That’s good. She should be back to her old self pretty soon. Little ones tend to bounce back quickly from these things, and she was in perfect health before. Now, Severus tells me you don’t remember having any jabs as a child.” He shook his head. “Okay. We can fix this. I’m going to need to take a blood sample and send it to the lab at the hospital. In a few hours they’ll be able to tell us which illnesses you’ve had or been immunised against, and which you haven’t.”

 

“What do we do about the ones I haven’t had?”

 

“I can give you the jabs myself, top up your immune system,” he said. “In all honesty, it shouldn’t be too many. You’re approaching eighteen, you’ve gone through a pregnancy, gone to school. It’s likely you’ve had most of the things you need to have had.”

 

Miri reached for Harry as she was given to Remus to hold, and Severus had to promise her that she could go back to him in a moment. Then Harry curled into Sirius and Severus wiped his arm with an alcohol swab. He drew the blood as swiftly as he could, flashing back to the morning of their wedding and doing exactly the same thing.

 

“All done, love,” he said, accepting the kiss Harry gave him, before Miri let out a truly pissed off shriek.

 

Remus chuckled and handed her back to Harry, where she snuggled in and glared at them all as she stuck her thumb in her mouth.

 

“I’ll take this off to St. Mungo’s. We should have the results in a few hours.”

 

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Miri giggled as she was surrounded by shopping bags, her little hands swiping at the plastic to make it crinkle. She had fully recovered from her flu and was her old happy self once more.

 

“Why do we bother buying her toys?” Severus asked as she let out a particularly loud shriek of delight.

 

“Because plastic bags are not playthings,” Molly replied as she hauled in another bag. “I raised seven children, and we never got through this much in a week.”

 

“Many more than nine people in this house,” Remus put in. He dumped the two bags in his hands down onto the floor, chuckling as Miri climbed over some to see what noise these ones made. “That’s all of them.”

 

The adults sat down around the table, sharing tea and cookies as Miri began to explore what was actually in the bags. She slowly emptied each one, and they looked on in amazement as she moved each item to where it should be. She ended up with a pile in front of the fridge, another by the kitchen counter below the higher cupboards, and another at the end of the table with all the things that belonged in the fruit bowl.

 

“Is that the first time she’s done that?” Remus asked as she made herself at home in the cupboard near the floor that held the tins.

 

“As far as I know,” Severus replied, nibbling at a ginger biscuit. “Harry did mention something about her doing something similar with the toys in the playroom.”

 

“She loves to put them away,” Harry said from the doorway, smiling at Miri slowly putting tins in the cupboard and babbling to herself, happy as could be. “I leave her with you for ten minutes,” he teased, crossing the room to kiss Severus.

 

“She’s happy enough.”

 

“She might be, but I don’t think Solarin is.”

 

“How so?”

 

“She’s a little high strung. She’s in the playroom, and she seems a bit tense. I think she needs you.”

 

Severus leaned in and kissed him once more before he made his way from the room.

 

He found his sister in the playroom, as Harry had said she was. Dorian was happily playing on the floor with some Lego, building what seemed to be a house. Solarin was pacing with the new baby in her arms, the tiny thing screaming, tears pouring down Solarin’s face.

 

“Sol? Sweetheart, what’s wrong?”

 

“She won’t stop. No matter what I do, she won’t stop crying. She’s almost a week old, and she screams every time I pick her up.”

 

He crossed the room, taking the baby from her and laying her down on one of the play mats. It wouldn’t do her any harm to cry for a while, just until he’d calmed the Augur down. Dorian abandoned his toys and crawled over, laying down and cuddling into his sister.

 

The baby suddenly stopped, snuffling a few times before laying contentedly with her brother.

 

“See?” Solarin said, motioning to the children. “She hates me!”

 

Severus smothered his grin. “Dorian, will you stay with the baby for a moment?”

 

“I will, Uncle Sevwus.”

 

“Good boy.” He slipped an arm around Solarin’s shoulders and guided her out of the room, settling her in the main living room and curling up with her on the sofa. “Oh, sweetheart,” he soothed. “She doesn’t hate you, I promise.”

 

“She does!” she argued, tears flowing. “She screams at me no matter what I do!”

 

“Solarin, stop this and listen to me,” he commanded and she fell quiet, sniffling into his chest. “Now, she doesn’t hate you. She is a week old, she does not have the capacity for hate. But she does have the ability to feed off of you, of what you put out. Now tell me, honestly young lady. When did you last have some sleep?”

 

“Not since she came home,” she mumbled.

 

“Night feeds? Worried you won’t hear her cry?” he asked and she nodded. “I understand. I was the same the first few nights I had you. I was so worried you’d need me and I wouldn’t wake up to you. Eventually I grew out of it.”

 

“How long?”

 

“Oh, about a week and a half. Until Albus swooped in and told me either I got some sleep or he’d drug me.” He chuckled. “Solarin, you will not sleep through her crying, I promise. Even if her cries do not wake you, your abilities will.” He pressed a kiss to her head. “Now, a small known fact of babies is that they pick up on how their caregiver feels, and they feed off it. If you are this stressed, how do you think she feels?”

 

“See? I’m a terrible mother.”

 

“Oh, piffle. What nonsense! You’re tired and stressed and overwhelmed. All of that tells me how much you love her and how much you want to do a good job. You are not a terrible mother.”

 

He pulled back and forced her to look at him. “Solarin, listen to me. You are going to give your children to me for a few hours. You’re going to take a hot bath, and a long nap, and then you’re going to come back at it.”

 

“Oh, I can’t,” she protested. “She needs a feed and I promised Dorian…”

 

“Hush. I will take care of it. Go.”

 

She ran her hands through her hair before she nodded and left the room. Severus heard her tell Dorian where she was going and then move off to the stairs, off to her room.

 

Severus waited until he was sure she’d done what she was told and then he returned to the playroom, picking up the baby and taking Dorian’s hand, taking them with him back to the kitchen.

 

“Oh, come to grandma,” Molly cooed, taking the baby from him while Harry swooped in and picked Dorian up, tickling him. “Where’s mummy, hmmm?”

 

“Takin’ a baff,” Dorian said as Harry let him up for air.

 

“She’s a little overwhelmed,” Severus said. “Needs a few hours.”

 

“Ah,” Molly said, reaching in the fridge for a bottle of formula.

 

“Baba,” Miri said, pointing.

 

“That’s right, sweetheart,” Severus said, picking her up. “That’s a baby.”

 

“Me baba.”

 

“Yes, you’re a baby too. You’re my baby,” he said, kissing her cheek and making her squeal

 

“Caya baba.”

 

“Yes, you’re carrier’s baby.”

 

She seemed content enough with that and danced in his arms, her little body moving from side to side while she waved her hands.

 

“I not a baby,” Dorian said, content to sit on Harry’s lap and draw pictures with the crayons Remus set down.

 

“No, you’re a big boy,” Remus said, picking up a crayon to draw his own picture. “Babies wear nappies and have bottles. You don’t have those.”

 

“I sweep in a big boy bed.”

 

“Yes, you sleep in a big boy bed.”

 

“And I help mummy with the baby.”

 

“Oh yes, you do. You’re a very good big brother, just like daddy.” Dorian beamed. “Has Solarin or Bill mentioned any names for the little one?”

 

“Not yet,” Molly said as she eased the teat into the little questing mouth.

 

They spent the afternoon in light conversation, and as the time for dinner approached other members of the family began to arrive home.

 

Bill received the most enthusiastic welcome from Dorian, who pelted across the kitchen to be scooped up and hugged.

 

“Hi, daddy.”

 

“There’s my little man,” Bill said, nuzzling his son. “Have you been good?”

 

“Uh-huh. I helped with the baby.”

 

“You did? That’s great.” He looked around the room. “Where’s mummy?”

 

“Sweepin’. I helpin’ with dinner!”

 

“You are? Good boy! Go on then, go help,” he said as he set Dorian down, the little boy running back to the counter to climb back on his stool, Molly passing him more carrots for him to peel.

 

Severus was walking with the baby, patting her little back to help her settle for a nap. She was fighting valiantly, but the result was a foregone conclusion.

 

“What happened?” Bill asked, Severus pausing in one place but swaying side to side.

 

“She’s a little overwhelmed, felt she was a terrible mother and the baby hates her.”

 

“That’s ridiculous,” Bill scoffed. “Babies don’t hate…do they?”

 

“No, of course they don’t.”

 

“So you convinced her to get some sleep? You’re a better man than me. Been trying for days.”

 

“Yes, she took a hot soak and then a nap. Speaking of, someone should probably wake her for something to eat.”

 

“I’ll go…that is, if you’re okay with the kids.”

 

“We’re fine,” Severus assured, glancing over at Dorian, who was happily peeling away.

 

Bill slowly climbed the stairs to his room, letting himself into the darkened room and toeing off his boots, slipping off his robes. He slid into bed with his wife and curled around her, pressing kisses to her neck.

 

“Arin…Arin, baby, wake up,” he called softly, winding his arm around her as she whimpered.

 

“Mmmm,”she moaned, stroking the arms around her waist. “You’re home. What time is it?”

 

“A little after six. Severus said you should come eat something.”

 

She rolled over and snuggled in to him, nuzzling at his chest.

 

“You feel better now you’ve had some sleep?” he asked and she nodded, making him smile. “I told you that you needed it. Hot bath, some sleep, next up some food, and soon enough you’ll be back to the sane version of my wife.”

 

“I’m sorry,” she said, rolling onto her back to look up at him. “I’ve been a bitch.”

 

“Yes, but that’s part of your charm.” He leaned in and kissed her, feeling her fingers stealing into his hair, pulling it from the band.

 

“Your mother pointed out that the little madam needs a name,” Solarin said when they were eventually happy to disconnect.

 

“She’s not wrong.”

 

“I had some thoughts.”

 

“Yeah? What do you have in mind?”

 

“I’d like it to start with a D, like Dorian. So I went through the baby name book Harry has, the one he got when he was pregnant, and I found a couple of options. The usual things, Danielle, Davina, Daisy.  But my favourite is Daven. It’s technically a boy’s name, but it means beloved.”

 

“Daven…I like it. What about middle names? Dorian has two, Arthur Severus.”

 

“Molly Minerva,” Solarin said immediately.

 

“Daven Molly Minerva Weasley-Snape. I like it.”

 

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As it turned out, Lily and James had been very vigilant when it came to their son, and Harry had had all the immunisations he should have had in his first year. After that, however, was a different story.

 

Severus wanted to kill Petunia Dursley.

 

With Muggle immunisations being free for all children on the NHS, there shouldn’t have been any reason for Harry not to have his jabs. But he hadn’t. Sam had managed to dig up Harry’s childhood medical records, and it was noted that Petunia hadn’t believed in jabs. Yet Dudley had received all of his.

 

“I can only conclude that she was hoping he’d catch something,” Sam said sadly. “And that something would kill him.”

 

“Harry said he’d had mumps,” Severus said, warming his hands on his mug of tea. “Can you tell which others he actually caught? And what he might need a jab for?”

 

“I can,” Sam said, opening the envelope from St Mungo’s. “He’s had most Muggle things, and some, like polio, he got lucky with. The initial vaccine Lily had given to him was enough to keep him safe. I still want to give him a top up, just to be safe, but he was incredibly lucky.”

 

“What about magical illnesses?”

 

“There’s the problem. Most of those jabs are done in the preschool booster, or, in the case of Muggleborns, they’re given them when they get to Hogwarts. Harry hasn’t had them. He’s got no immunity against any of it. I spoke to Poppy Pomfrey. She assumed he’d had them, that someone had seen to it. Everyone assumed someone else had taken care of it.”

 

“Not even Dragon Pox?” Severus asked, horrified.

 

“He had the first two, given at six and twelve months, but he didn’t have the third. That’s given at eighteen months, and Harry was with Petunia then.”

 

“And even had she known, it’s doubtful she would have taken him for it.”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“So what do you propose?” Severus questioned, pouring the doctor more tea.

 

“I want to give him a couple of Muggle boosters, one for his MMR, that’s measles, mumps and rubella, but without the mumps one, so it’ll be two separate injections, and I want to give him the DTP triple vaccine, for his diphtheria, tetanus and whooping cough. I also want to top up his polio vaccine, but that one is oral.”

 

“And the Magical ailments?”

 

“A course of vaccinations, most as simple potions. The poxes, that’s Dragon, Doxy and Pixie, those are all injections.”

 

“Just give me an idea of how long it’ll be before he’s clear and safe.”

 

“Don’t worry, Severus. He’ll be covered by the time you get on that plane.”

 

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April rolled upon them before they knew it, and then it was the day of Harry and Severus’ great adventure. Everyone was nervous, with good reason, but Severus wasn’t worried. He’d planned their travel arrangements down to the letter.

 

Harry was now fully vaccinated, as Sam had promised. He’d managed to get through most of them with nothing but a little swelling where the needle had punctured the skin. The oral vaccines had put him off his food for about a day, but nothing serious. The Dragon pox vaccine, however, had laid Harry up for two days with a fever and violent sneezing, accompanied by his magic flaring and shooting flames every time he sneezed. It would have been funny if Harry hadn’t felt so unwell.

 

Harry had had great fun packing their suitcases, picking out which of Miri’s clothes would be coming with them, what was needed in their hand luggage. And Severus had needed to give him a mild calming draught to get him to sleep the night before.

 

And now here they were, making final checks while they waited for the Ministry car Arthur had arranged for them.

 

“Look, I trust you, you know I do,” Sirius said quietly, pulling Severus to one side. “But are you sure about this? What if something goes wrong? What if Harry can’t handle it? What if it’s too much for Miri?”

 

“Sirius, take a breath and relax. We will be fine, I promise. I have travelled with a little Augur before, I know what I’m doing. And I would never let anything happen to Harry. So just relax. I have it all under control.”

 

“Car’s here,” Phoenix said from the hallway and Harry grinned at him.

 

They gathered their bags, and Sirius and Remus helped them get their suitcases and Miri’s pram into the car. A few final farewells and they were off.

 

The car journey was a pleasant experience, Miri entranced by the world speeding past her window, and Harry enjoying being outside. His lover was a little nervous, but Severus had anticipated that and decided to ignore it unless it got worse.

 

They made it to the airport with plenty of time to spare.

 

Gatwick airport was huge, but pretty empty, owing to the early hour. They unloaded their things, thanked the driver, and made their way inside. Harry was content to let Severus lead. After all, Severus had done this before. Severus led him to a desk with the travel company name on the sign above.

 

Check in was simple enough, even if the woman at the desk had given herself away as a witch by the way she had done a double take at Harry’s passport. Their suitcases had been well under the allowed weight limit, and Severus had managed to fold down Miri’s buggy without too much trouble. The witch at the desk had given them the choice of whether to check it in with their luggage or keep it until they boarded the plane. Harry felt better carrying Miri.

 

Once the two wizards had relieved themselves of all but Miri and their carryon bag, they made their way to the security check point. It was here that they had a slight hiccup.

 

They showed their passports and tickets, put their bag on the conveyor to be x-rayed, and waited their turn to go through the body scanners. Severus went first, reaching out and taking Miri as Harry did as instructed and passed her through. And then Harry stepped through, setting off the alarm.

 

“Step over here, please, sir,” the big burly security guard requested and Harry did as he was told, looking worriedly at Severus.

 

“Hold your arms out like this.” The guard held out his arms to the side, straight out at shoulder height. Harry copied him and then backed away as the man moved to touch him.

 

Severus had been watching, waiting to see how his husband handled it. When he saw Harry move away, he stepped forwards, handing Miri to a female security guard.

 

“Let me show him,” he said to the guard. “He’s never travelled before, he doesn’t know what you’re going to do.”

 

The guard nodded, and Severus stood where he was directed. “Watch, love,” Severus instructed. Harry nodded and watched as Severus held his arms out, smiling reassuringly as the guard ran his hands along his tall frame.

 

“See?” Severus asked as he retrieved Miri and picked up the bag. “Ten seconds, nothing to worry about. Just stand still and he’ll be very quick.”

 

Harry took a deep breath, locked eyes with Severus and held his arms out like the man had shown him. Quick hands slid over his arms, his chest, stomach, round to his back. Fingers checked his collar and then the waistband of his trousers. The hands skimmed over his legs, moving a little too close to his privates for Harry’s liking, before the hands were gone.

 

“All done, just need you to take your shoes off for me.”

 

Harry toed off his trainers and handed them over, watching as they were placed on the conveyor belt and disappeared. Severus kissed his temple as he tried to grab them, alarm on his face.

 

“They’ll come out the other end, Harry,” he reassured. “They’re x-raying them, like they did with the bag.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because a terrorist once hid explosives in his shoes and used them to blow up a plane. Now all airports have tight security.”

 

“Oh. Like Mad-Eye’s constant vigilance?”

 

“Just like. Look, here they are.” Severus motioned to the emerging shoes.

 

Harry slipped them on and took Miri before letting Severus guide him forwards. The space was massive, high bright ceilings covering them, sectioned areas filled with seats, hundreds of people milling about. Miri whined and grabbed her ears.

 

“No, Miri. No look, no see,” Harry ordered and Miri went still for a moment before giggling. Harry cuddled her close and blew a raspberry on her cheek. “That’s my good girl.”

 

They made a lap of the duty free, where they bought a couple bottles of water and some sweets and crisps for the plane, and then Severus led Harry to Café Rouge for a full English.

 

“But we had crumpets,” Harry said, easing Miri into a highchair.

 

“Ah, but we’re on holiday. And it’ll be a good few hours before we get another chance for a proper meal. You’ll thank me, love, trust me.”

 

Their food arrived and Severus quickly swiped the toast from both their plates, hiding it under a napkin, before cutting up some of his and Harry’s breakfasts for Miri to nibble at. She was too little to manage a breakfast of her own, and only hungry enough to nibble.

 

Harry found himself people watching as they ate. Men in suits, some in jeans, some looking lost, others in a hurry. Women in heels, ones in trainers, some with kids, others Molly’s age. There were some babies, some toddlers, others that were older.

 

“I’m invisible,” Harry said in surprise.

 

“Hmmm?” Severus queried as he let Miri suck at his straw, getting some of his orange juice, before she went back to her sausage.

 

“No one’s looking at me,” Harry explained with a grin. “I’m invisible.”

 

“Severus smiled back. “Invisible might be a bit far,” he said. “But these are, presumably, all Muggles, love. They don’t know who you are. And, if they do, they’re all focussed on not missing their flight.”

 

They finished up and Harry let Severus guide him once more. Severus found an information board and they made their way to gate 42. There was a half hour wait, so Harry took the opportunity to change Miri’s nappy, and Severus moved things about in the bag, filling Miri’s Sippy cup with water from one of the bottles.

 

Severus urged Harry into the window seat, taking Miri while the Gryffindor got comfortable and found the pieces of his seatbelt. A nice flight attendant helped them secure Miri on Harry’s lap with an infant belt, Severus took his seat, and then they were taxiing down the runway. Severus and Harry each popped a hard-boiled sweet into their mouths and Harry cuddled Miri in, getting her to gulp at her cup at Severus’ urging.

 

The force of take-off pushed Harry back into his seat, and Miri clutched at his fingers, but they managed to relax as they reached 37,000 feet. Miri fell asleep before the drinks cart had even begun its lap of the plane. Severus tried to get as comfortable as he could, which was practically impossible for a 6’2” man in that small a space. He envied Harry’s shorter legs.

 

“The place we’re going,” Harry began, shifting slightly in his seat.

 

“Cala Bona,” Severus supplied.

 

“It’s magical?”

 

“Yes. It’s inhabited and run by Muggle borns and their families, as a holiday resort for witches and wizards. I brought Solarin here years ago; she absolutely loved it.”

 

“Well, if they survived Sol, Miri should be no trouble.”

 

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Miri awoke with a jolt as they landed and snuggled into Harry for a moment before she caught sight of the bright sunshine outside the window, and then she couldn’t wait to see what was going on around her.

 

They made their way off the plane, through passport control and towards the baggage reclaim.

 

“Caya,” Miri said as they were waiting for their bags to come through.

 

“What, sweetheart?”

 

“Et,” she said and Harry looked to Severus.

 

Severus pointed out the toilets and promised that he would be waiting by the impossible to miss information point. He watched Harry disappear before he darted forwards to grab Harry’s suitcase.

 

“Professor?”

 

He looked up to see a man and a woman looking at him.

 

“Professor, I’m Auror Kelley, this is Auror Summers. Mad-Eye sent us,” said the young woman.

 

Severus looked at the badges they flashed him. “Why did he send you?”

 

“To keep an eye on things. He wanted to be sure you had a peaceful vacation.”

 

Severus grinned. He should have known Moody would do something like this. The man was obsessive about the safety of those he loved, even if he would never say anything.

 

“Thank you for coming,” he said. “I promise nothing too adrenaline filled, nice peaceful week. And it is appreciated, I assure you. Just…Harry doesn’t need to know about it.”

 

“Of course not,” Summers agreed as Kelley pulled Severus’ case off the conveyor belt. “He’ll never even know we’re here. Oh. Before I forget. Have them wear this.” He held out a box, opening it to show a pendant and a tiny, baby-sized bracelet. “It’ll stop any photos of them taken by anyone other than you. Very complicated spell work, and it needs to be returned to the Ministry when you return.”

 

Severus accepted the box and thanked them and then watched them disappear into the crowds before snagging Miri’s buggy and loading up a trolley, rolling over to the information point. Harry joined him with a happy Miri, and they made their way outside. The heat hit them, and it was glorious. They found the correct coach and Harry climbed aboard with Miri while Severus made sure their luggage was all loaded.

 

“Harry?”

 

“Yes?”

 

“If I asked you for something, to do something for me while we’re here, would you?”

 

“Of course.”

 

Severus pulled out the box, showing him the pendant and bracelet. “Wear this for me? It’ll stop people taking pictures of you. The bracelet will do the same for Miri. I don’t want you to have to worry about fans taking pictures, I want you to be able to relax.”

 

“Of course we’ll wear them,” he said immediately, grabbing the bracelet and slipping it on Miri’s tiny wrist. Severus fastened the pendant around his neck and their tour guide announced over the speaker that they needed to take their seats.

 

As they journeyed through the island of Mallorca towards Cala Bona, Severus found himself transfixed by his husband.

 

Harry watched in awe as sun scorched earth sped by, the ground so red it looked like the surface of Mars. Gnarled and twisted trees, scrubby little bushes, wide open vistas with vast green mountains. A sky so big and blue that dreams had space to dance. They past herds of semi-wild horses, pottery workshops, farms with rows upon rows of lemon trees, another with olives, one with oranges. The deep pale pit of a quarry, the sandy stone of an immense cathedral, the rush of swooping birds, each no bigger than a baby’s foot. Harry watched it all fly past, his eyes alight with the wonder and amazement of a child.

 

Harry had stood Miri on one of his thighs and the tiny girl was nose to the glass, her little hands tiny starfish beside her head. She babbled away, each word running into the next in her excitement.

 

After an hour and a half, in which none of them grew bored, they finally pulled up outside the Hotel Bonaire. Harry shielded his eyes and looked up at the terracotta building, taking in the tile floors, the expansive windows, the tasteful planting. There was a water feature in front of the main doors, a huge 20 foot windmill with water pouring out about halfway down.

 

As Harry began to strap Miri into the pushchair Severus had unfolded, he heard a whispering somewhere behind him.

 

“It can’t be.”

 

“It is! It’s him!”

 

“Who?”

 

“Harry Potter!”

 

“Never! Which one?”

 

“That one! With the baby!”

 

He sighed and adjusted the sun umbrella over Miri, digging in the bag for her water and handing it to her.

 

“Ta,” she said before jamming the teat in her mouth and sucking heartily. Harry gently pulled off her little trainers and socks, running over her sweaty feet with a wet wipe and watching her little toes wriggle in sudden freedom.

 

“The Prophet said he didn’t take care of the baby,” the whisperer said, a woman by the sound of it.

 

“Don’t be stupid, mum,” said another, this one apparently a teenage girl. “Didn’t you read the Quibbler? That Prophet article was complete rubbish. Anyway, just look. He’s obviously devoted.”

 

“Are you alright, love?”

 

Harry looked up to see Severus looking down at him worriedly. Harry stood and moved into the circle of Severus’ arms even though it was too hot to really be comfortable.

 

“They’re talking about me,” Harry admitted. “They’ve recognised me. And they’ve read Skeeter.”

 

Severus looked over his head at the two witches and a wizard openly looking at them, whispering and pointing. He sighed and pressed a kiss to Harry’s scar.

 

“May we help you with something?” he called. “Or are you content to gossip?”

 

They all flushed and gathered their things, hurrying inside.

 

“Feel free to point out more vultures to me, love,” Severus said. “After all, I have a reputation as a mean bastard to uphold.”

 

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That afternoon was spent unpacking and locating the supermarket. They had decided to go self-catering so they had the freedom to eat when and where they wanted.

 

Harry found himself alone in their apartment with Miri while Severus shot to the supermarket. He laid out a blanket on the white tile floor and set Miri on it with some of her toys while he looked around, opening cupboards and drawers, finding where everything was, unpacking as he went.

 

He found the safe in the closet in the bedroom, and Miri’s crib was beside Harry’s side of the bed, which was two singles pushed together, clamped in place. The bathroom had a bath and shower, though he judged the tub to be too small for either Severus or himself. Harry found the kettle in one of the kitchen cupboards, and cups in another. There were two sofas in the living room and sliding doors that opened out onto a high walled balcony.

 

Harry made his way out and sat down on one of the patio chairs, taking in the view. There was another hotel directly opposite, far enough away that his privacy was assured, and a children’s playground below the balcony. He could see the pool if he looked left, and the sea if he looked slightly to the right.

 

It was hot, hotter than Harry had ever encountered, even during the heat waves of last summer, and he could feel sweat coating his back. He was just about to go and change into something cooler when the sound of little hands slapping the floor drew his attention. Miri crawled determinedly to him, carefully negotiating the lip of the doorframe, and sat back on her knees, holding her hands up to him.

 

“Caya, me see, peas,” she asked and then squealed in delight as he picked her up, standing and pointing out the view to her.

 

She babbled away, pointing at the palm trees, the slide, the pool, and getting very excited at the sight of ice creams.

 

“Caya.”

 

“Yes, baby?”

 

“Ot.”

 

“You’re hot?”

 

“Es.”

 

“Me too. Shall we get changed into something better?”

 

“Es. Dada?”

 

“Daddy will be back in a minute,” he reassured as he walked her to the bedroom. He sat her on the bed, instructing her to stay put, before moving to the closet, pulling off his shirt as he went.

 

“Which one?” he asked, holding out two sun-dresses, one pink with white butterflies, the other yellow with blue flowers.

 

“Lellow.”

 

She obediently moved this way and that so he could strip her off and watched the birds flying by the window as he slipped the dress on her, before she was placed on the cool tile floor.

 

Harry heard the door open and the rustle of plastic bags as he dug through the bag of toiletries for Miri’s hair clips.

 

“Harry?”

 

“In here.”

 

Severus appeared in the doorway, red in the face with sweat beading on his forehead.

 

“Sweet Merlin, it’s hot out there,” he said.

 

“Miri thought the same,” Harry said as Severus bent to pick her up. He moved closer and swept her curls back off her face, securing them with a clip.

 

“Dada,” Miri said as Harry shimmied out of his trousers.

 

“Yes?” Severus replied, placing her on the bed. “Sit still, Miri, so you don’t fall.”

 

“Me sit,” she promised as he pulled off his own shirt. “Dada, duns, peas.”

 

“She’s right,” Harry said, looking at his watch. “It’s lunchtime.”

 

“Where would you like to eat, love?” he asked Harry, contemplating his Dark Mark. “Should I try and cover this?”

 

“No,” Harry replied without pause. “I don’t mind it, and you keep saying it doesn’t matter what the public think. What are my choices?”

 

“We could have sandwiches in here, or we can order something from the poolside bar downstairs, or perhaps a walk down to the front to find something.”

 

“By the pool.”

 

They covered themselves and Miri in sun cream, made sure they had everything they needed, and made their way downstairs.

 

It was wonderful to sit in the sun, basking in the beautiful heat and glow.

 

“Hola,” said the waiter. “How are you today, my friends?”

 

“We’re very well, thank you,” Severus replied.

 

“Very good. Your first time here with us?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“I hope you enjoy your stay, and please don’t hesitate to ask for anything you need. Now, I have some menus for you, and my friend here has a high chair for the beautiful little girl. Can I start you off with a drink?”

 

Severus looked to Harry, who shrugged. “Two orange juices, please. And a small slush drink for the little one, an orange one please.”

 

He nodded and walked away.

 

“What do you like the look of?” Severus asked, looking at the menu.

 

“The pizza looks good. How about you?”

 

“I think I’ll have…the omelette. A salad for Miri? I don’t think she’ll eat anything hot at the moment.”

 

“Either salad or…” Harry trailed off, pointing to the ice creams.

 

“Salad it is then.”

 

The waiter returned with their drinks and they placed their orders and then sat back to watch the world go by. Miri found it highly amusing when anyone jumped in the pool and made a splash; she kept giggling at it.

 

“How are you doing?” Severus asked as they sipped their drinks. Miri was having great fun poking at her slush, shoving the ice crystals into her mouth and licking at the melted juice on her hand and arm.

 

“I’m okay,” Harry said. “Admittedly, I don’t appreciate being gossiped about, but that’s just a little thing, and it’d happen if we were at home. The room’s nice, weather’s beautiful, the resort is gorgeous. I haven’t found a downside yet.”

 

“And the plane?”

 

“I think I prefer my broom.”

 

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Late that night, Severus lay in bed, watching Harry and Miri sleep.

 

They had enjoyed lunch by the pool and then sat for a while, enjoying more drinks in the hot sunshine, and then they had gone for a stroll around the hotel grounds. They had found the children’s splash pool, four inches of water with various animal shaped slides, all centred around a life size pirate ship with working low power water cannons. They’d had to promise Miri she could play there tomorrow.

 

They had also found the kids club, where parents could leave their children with holiday reps while they went off and did other things. The mere idea had made Harry shudder.

 

The highlight of the stroll had been the pond. Harry had laughed in delight as the ‘statues’ moved, revealing themselves as real turtles. Miri had named them Caya, Dada, Sis, Rus and baba.

 

They had dinner in the hotel dining room, an all-you-can-eat buffet affair. Miri had delighted in the highchair that pulled right up to the cloth covered table, sitting her right at the table with her parents, and the vegetables and pasta Harry put before her, along with some salad and a torn up roll. Severus had thoroughly enjoyed his swordfish, and Harry had managed seconds of his lamb in red wine sauce. They had lingered, Miri nibbling on an apple, Harry and Severus on some cheese and crackers, before the day of travel had caught up with them all. Miri had splashed her way through her bath and held on to Severus’ finger as Harry nursed her.

 

She was asleep before they even managed to get her into the crib.

 

And now, in the silence of the night, Severus was hard as a rock.

 

He debated with himself for as long as he could stand it, before he cast privacy charms around the bed so Miri wouldn’t hear or see anything if she happened to wake. He made sure the lube was within easy reach before he slid across the bed to mould himself to Harry’s frame, his lips finding the sweet curve of his neck.

 

Harry moaned at the soft hands on his skin, the hot lips on his neck.

 

“What time is it?” he mumbled as Severus rolled him onto his back, pinning him beneath his weight.

 

“Late. Or early, depending on your perspective,” he murmured, nibbling at his throat.

 

“Oh,” he said as he felt Severus’ hard length against his thigh. “Really? Aren’t you too tired for it?”

 

“Apparently not. If you are, I can take care of it in the bathroom.”

 

“No! I want it. But…do we have to do it in the bed? I had a few ideas.”

 

Severus grinned, stroking his thigh. “Oh, do tell.”

 

“The sofa. We’ve never done it on a sofa.”

 

Severus wasted no time in getting up, kissing Harry as he picked him up, Harry’s legs going around his waist. He grabbed the lube before carrying him out of the room, sitting down on the sofa. Harry grinned at him.

 

“Hmmm. Maybe we should get a sofa for our room.”

 

Severus surrendered to the kiss Harry gifted him with. And it truly was a gift, being able to touch Harry like that, to demonstrate his love. No one else got to see Harry like that, no one got have Harry touch them with those wonderful fleeting touches, or got to enjoy his wild kisses. The wild ones, the gentle ones, and all the kisses in-between.

 

Their thin sleepwear hit the tiled floor and they let their hands wander, sliding over warm skin, gripping at hips and caressing sensitive spots.

 

Harry loved the sofa. They’d done it with Harry on top before, of course they had, but the sofa was different. It put Severus at a different angle, supported him in an entirely new way. It made Harry feel a little vulnerable, having no bed to fall back on, nothing but open air at his back. If Severus let go of him, he’d fall, hit the cold tile, probably get hurt.

 

“I know what you’re thinking,” Severus murmured as he slid a hand up his inner thigh, so slow Harry thought he might go out of his mind before he touched him where it mattered.

 

“Really?” he replied breathlessly, fingers tangling in his hair.

 

“Yes. I would never let you fall,” he promised, squeezing him with the arm wrapped around his waist.

 

Harry sealed their mouths together, snaking his tongue inside, whimpering as Severus’ hot palm pressed against his aching erection, fingertips pressing against his slick folds, cradling his balls. Severus’ hands were probably Harry’s favourite part of the man. They were big and strong, strong enough to hold him together and gentle enough to caress him.

 

Harry pushed down against the hand, moaning softly when he was stroked.

 

“Don’t,” Harry begged. “I need you to…I need. Don’t draw it out…”

 

Severus hadn’t realised how desperate Harry was, how long it had been since…actually, they had never truly let go, never really relaxed. But now they were in another country, a few thousand miles between them and Lucius and whatever he was coming up with. For a week, they had nothing to worry about other than how they would spend their day. The pool, the beach, go on an excursion. It was completely up to them, and they could do anything they wanted without needing to check over their shoulders.

 

Severus wasted no time in opening the lube, adding to Harry’s natural slick and coating himself, guiding Harry to sink down onto him. As always, Harry stilled, savouring the moment they joined, surrounding them with each other, so nothing in the world existed but them, the two of them making their own universe where nothing mattered but the other, their skin, their touch, taste, feel, pure pleasure.

 

Harry moved over him, squeezing him with inner muscles so Severus’ eyes rolled back. Harry was insatiable, moving in pure lust, taking what he needed and pulling Severus along for the ride.

 

From the way he moved, the pure desire written across his face, the way he gripped at his husband, lips kissing and teeth nipping, Severus knew he wouldn’t need to touch Harry’s clit.

 

His little lover had it all under control.

 

Severus let himself thrust, and Harry gripped his shoulders, using them to steady himself as they moved to meet each other. Not once did they falter. They knew each other’s bodies so well that it was practically instinctual, knowing just where and how and when to touch to bring the other maximum amount of pleasure in the least amount of time.

 

Harry’s teeth sank into his shoulder as he screamed, sticky heat hitting his stomach and chest, and Severus thrust twice more before he spilled, his release hitting deep inside his lover.

 

Harry snuggled sleepily into him. Severus knew they should get cleaned up and go back to bed, get some sleep. But Harry was all pliant and satisfied.

 

“Just a few minutes,” Harry mumbled. “Few minutes then bed.”

 

Severus couldn’t agree more.

 

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They woke bright and early the next morning and, after showers and sun cream, they had breakfast in the dining room. The waitresses found Miri adorable, and they all wanted to hold her for a cuddle, but Miri was having none of it. And a particularly determined one plucked her from Severus’ arms, she heated her hands, causing the woman to almost drop her.

 

“No, Miri!” Harry scolded, his heart not truly in it. “That’s not nice.”

 

“Well, we did tell her not to take her,” Severus pointed out reasonably as the waitress hurried away and the manager came over and apologised for her behaviour. “She chose not to listen.”

 

“Still, it’s not something I’m supposed to praise, is it?” Harry said as they chose a table, Severus pulling over a highchair.

 

“Not really,” Severus agreed. “Juice?”

 

They took their time over the meal and then they decided to go for a walk down the seafront. Miri happily watched this sunny new world go by, babbling and pointing to things, squealing and giggling when something really caught her attention. Harry loved watching the sea go in and out, the sound of it, the smell. It was wonderful.

 

They came across a small harbour where Harry had excitedly pointed out a school of fish swimming around the moored boats.

 

They took a trip on a glass bottom boat, Harry fascinated by the underwater world suddenly revealed to them, and Miri waved at every fish that went past. Severus sat back and enjoyed the sea air on his face, the sound of Harry pointing things out to Miri, the baby giggling, the gentle motion of the boat. It was incredibly peaceful.

 

After their aquatic adventure, they continued along down the promenade. They bought t-shirts, toys, ornaments, jewellery, hats, key rings, magnets bags and sweets as gifts for their family back home. Harry specially purchased gifts for his parents, a decorative bottle of sangria for Sirius, and a book full of information about the island for Remus. Severus found a tobacconist and bought Solarin 200 of her favourite cigarettes.

 

Miri ended up with more toys than she knew what to do with. Dolls, stuffed characters from cartoons none of them recognised, rattles, balls, things on springs, doodads that attached to the buggy, jigsaws, colouring books, crayons, cars, trucks, soldiers. Harry and Severus earmarked them all for the playroom when they got home, but they saw no harm in letting Miri play with them until then.

 

Harry bought Miri a little pink flamenco dancers dress and shoes. He wanted it for her first birthday in a few weeks. He was planning a pretty princess party for her.

 

They had lunch in a little sandwich bar run by an English couple called Frank and June. Their sandwiches came with salad and crisps, which Harry proceeded to put in his ham and cheese to make it crunch.

 

It was on their way back towards the hotel that Miri caught their attention and proclaimed that she was wet. They stopped at a restaurant and ordered two cokes. Severus slipped inside to change the 11 month old and Harry sat, taking in the view. When the drinks arrived, they came with two free chicken wings and a handful of mini breadsticks.

 

“Did you order these?” Severus questioned as he returned.

 

“No. All drinks come with them,” Harry said, motioning to the other tables and offering Miri a mini breadstick.

 

“Down,” Miri said. “Down, peas, dada.”

 

Severus looked around, seeing how busy it was, before he lowered her to the floor, the tiny girl standing independently, holding onto the hem of Severus’ shorts. If Miri decided to craw about on the smooth paving, it wouldn’t do to get her stepped on.

 

“Who’s a clever girl?” Harry called, depositing his chicken bone into a napkin.

 

She grinned up at him before looking around, her bright green eyes taking it in. She wriggled her bare little toes before she very determinedly took her first step. She let go of her father’s shorts and put her arms out to the side, slowly stepping away from him.

 

Severus whipped out the camera and started snapping pictures as fast as he could while Harry moved a few steps away, squatting down and holding his hands out to her. She giggled and slowly plodded to him. She got about halfway there before she wobbled and abruptly sat down on her squashy bottom. She looked around for a moment before placing her hands on the floor, getting back up by pushing her butt up into the air before going upright and clapping. She continued her plodding, straight into Harry’s arms.

 

“That’s my clever girl!” Harry cried as he scooped her up, his eyes swimming with tears. “Look at you!”

 

“Are you alright?” Severus asked, crowding close.

 

Harry nodded, his smile wide. “She walked! My baby walked!”

 

“She did. I got it all.” He held up the camera.

 

“Me alk,” Miri announced, as if her parents were praising the most obvious thing in the world.

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Harry was not a strong swimmer.

 

Despite having competed in the second Triwizard task, Harry was not confident in the water, especially when it came to Miri. She was so eager to get in the water it was hard to keep a hold of her. When given the choice between the splash pool she’d seen the day before, and the huge expanse of the full pool, it had taken her mere moments to decide on the big one.

 

“It’ll be fine, Harry,” Severus promised. “I am a very proficient swimmer, and a devoted father and husband. No one will be drowning on my watch.”

 

“You’re right,” Harry agreed as he shimmied into his swimming trunks. “You know…Solarin got me a bikini top. If I wanted to cover up. If I wanted.”

 

“You could wear that, if you wanted. Or perhaps a t-shirt, if it would be more comfortable for you. Or you could just stick with the shorts.”

 

“Won’t people get scared?”

 

Severus froze in the middle of tying his hair back.

 

“Oh, love,” he said softly, pulling Harry in for a kiss. “If they get scared over a few scars, then that’s their problem. You know how I feel about them. I love you, every tiny little piece of you. I think you are stunning. If you want to cover up because that’s what you feel comfortable with, then by all means, cover what you wish. But do not do it to make some gossiping busybodies feel better.”

 

Harry grinned at him, pulling him in for another kiss, snaking his tongue inside and pressing close, until Severus had to push him back.

 

“Stop it, or I won’t be able to leave this room,” Severus warned.

 

“I’ll be good,” Harry promised as Miri began banging on the bedroom door with her little hands.

 

They’d left her in the living room with her toys so they could change, but it seemed they were taking too long for her demanding ideas.

 

“Caya! Dada! Swim!”

 

Harry opened the door and stood back as she made her unsteady way in, walking along in the funny plodding way she had. It made Harry deliriously happy every time he watched it. She’d been toddling along most of the day, only getting into her buggy to come back to the hotel. She’d been happy to doodle along around the apartment, munching her snack as she went, excited for her nap. And when she woke up all she wanted was for her parents to fulfil their promise of the pool.

 

“Okay, okay, we hear you,” Severus said indulgently. “Come on. Go to carrier and I’ll get your swimming costume.”

 

She shrieked in delight and wiggled along to Harry, holding up her arms. She happily let him strip her off, and then put her in a swimming nappy and her little swimming costume. It was pink with yellow polka dots, with a little ring of ruffles where a skirt would be, and it had a baby Tweety Bird on her chest. She also had five others, but that one was Harry’s favourite.

 

Once she was ready, and her parents, sun cream done for all of them, they packed up what they’d need into the buggy and Harry carried her down to the terrace. Once they were on the ground floor, he put her down and she held his hand as they headed towards the water.

 

“Swim! Swim! Me swim!”

 

“That’s right, Miri swim,” Harry said.

 

No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t say her own name. It kept coming out as Me instead of Miri. Oh well, she’d get it eventually.

 

“Let’s find somewhere to put our things first,” Severus said and she nodded, happily standing by the sun lounger they chose as they laid out towels and other necessities.

 

“Okay. How are we doing this?” Severus asked. “Shall I get in first, take her and then you follow us in?”

 

“Sounds good, let’s do that,” Harry said.

 

“Dada swim.”

 

Harry and Severus walked to the pool and Harry held onto Miri as the Slytherin lowered himself in.

 

“Sweet Merlin, that is glorious,” Severus moaned.

 

“Warm water?”

 

“Pleasantly cool, heated a little by the sun. It’s very nice. Alright, Miri, come on, sweetheart.”

 

Miri looked to her carrier, waiting for his encouraging smile before she cautiously tottered towards the edge. Her grip on Harry’s hand towed him with her, and he and Severus shared a smile as she sat down, scooting forwards to dip her feet in.

 

“Wet,” she declared.

 

Her speech had come on in leaps and bounds and she was improving by the day in her pronunciations. Just that morning she had been missing out her w’s.

 

“Yeah, it’s wet,” Harry agreed, sitting down with her, dipping his own feet. “It’s nice. Look. Daddy’s in. Do you want to go in too?”

 

“Caya in.”

 

“I’ll get in too.”

 

“Dada,” she said, holding her hands out for him. “In, peas.”

 

Severus picked her up and mimed chewing on her neck as he pulled her close. She shrieked and giggled and then realised that she was being held over an expanse of water, grabbing at Severus and looking for Harry.

 

The hermaphrodite lowered himself into the water and sighed in relief. It really was very hot compared to the weather at home, and the pool was wonderfully cool in comparison. He bounced a little, getting his balance, and then joined his husband and daughter.

 

“See? It’s nice,” Harry promised, splashing a little water over her legs.

 

Harry and Severus hadn’t seen the need for floatation devices. They weren’t going to take her to the deep end, nor were they going to let go of her, or attempt any daring swimming moves, and she was such a good girl that she wouldn’t be running around near the pool without holding onto one of them. Plus, they couldn’t actually get the damn things on her little arms.

 

Still, Severus could see some of the other parents whispering to each other about them

 

“Harry,” he said softly as Miri dived at him, the little sprite taking her.

 

“Mmmm?” he hummed, lowering Miri so she was comfortable in his arms, her legs in the water. She wiggled them, getting used to it, and then swished her hand through it, the other one firmly on her carrier’s shoulder.

 

“I would very much like it if you ignored the gossips.”

 

“Do I want to know what I’m doing wrong this time?”

 

“No floaties.”

 

“Oh, for the love of-!” Harry looked over at the gossiping women. “Take a picture, it’ll last longer!” he yelled and they all looked away, shame-faced.

 

“Don’t worry about them,” said a woman in the pool, her own baby happily splashing in her arms. “I changed him on a sun lounger yesterday. They made it sound like I was torturing him. They just can’t help themselves.”

 

“We noticed,” Severus grumbled, chuckling as Miri managed to splash herself full in the face. Her blinking surprise was hilarious.

 

Severus raised the waterproof camera looped around his wrist and snapped some pictures of Harry and Miri. The tiny girl was getting the hang of it all but she still wouldn’t take her hand off of Harry’s shoulder. The two green-eyed beauties kept glancing over at him, smiling, looking so relaxed.

 

The holiday was the greatest idea Severus had ever had.

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

“Oh, look, Severus sent us a letter.”

 

The family were sat around the breakfast table, nibbling away at the last of it as the post owls arrived.

 

Remus opened the letter, looking at the magically developed photographs and breaking into a huge grin.

 

“Oh! Siri! Look!”

 

Sirius set down his coffee and looked at the pictures Remus was showing him.

 

“Miri took her first steps,” he announced with a smile, passing the pictures around.

 

Miri in the pool in Harry’s arms; walking along in the apartment; Harry smiling as Severus snapped a candid picture of him half asleep on a sun lounger with Miri on his chest. Miri on the beach with Harry, building a sandcastle; Miri in Severus’ arms, the Potions Master chuckling as she spat out the handful of sand she’d decided to eat, finding out it didn’t taste good. The three of them at lunch in a little restaurant by the harbour, smiling and laid back.

 

“Damn, they look so relaxed,” Bill said, holding the pictures up for Solarin to see from where she was feeding Daven. “I didn’t know Severus could do relaxed.”

 

Sirius smiled. “Depends how much booze is involved.”

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Severus had assumed that Harry would want to take one of the daytrips available. There were trips to other parts of the island, trips to aquariums and water parks and caves. Trips to markets, evening shows, points of natural beauty.

 

But Harry didn’t want to do any of them. He liked walking along the parade of shops along the beachfront, he found enjoyment in the simple pleasures. Sitting with Severus and having a cold drink while they watch Miri play. Sitting on the beach and making castles, something he’d never had the chance to do before. Swimming in the pool. Taking Miri to the splash pool. Sitting on the balcony of their hotel, watching the world pass him by.

 

Severus really should have anticipated it. Harry had spent his formative years being denied every experience a child should have. Of course he wanted them. Harry took enjoyment in the small things most people would overlook or take for granted.

 

Harry was so content to amuse himself by watching the small fish in the harbour, build a castle with Miri on the beach, choose what he wanted to eat at dinner. Severus soon came to enjoy watching his pleasure, just the way he did when they claimed one another.

 

By the third day, they had found a sort of routine that lasted until they left.

 

They started each day by waking early, dressing, and having breakfast, sometimes in the apartment (where it was cereals and toast) and sometimes in the restaurant downstairs (which was a buffet affair with plenty of bacon).

 

Then they’d go for a walk down the front, letting Miri toddle along and babble at them as things caught her eye. Lunch was usually a small café down the front, watching the waves as they ate and then letting Miri play on the beach for a while.

 

They’d head back to the apartment for a snack and an afternoon nap, during which Miri slept and Harry and Severus took the opportunity to spend time together. They would talk and make out, and usually end up claiming on the sofa or floor, or even in the shower.

 

The afternoons were spent in the pool. Miri liked the splash pool, but she loved the full size one, going in with her daddy and her carrier, splashing away. Once she was tired out, she’d curl up with Harry on a sun lounger and nibble at the snacks Severus bought from the pool bar, suckling at her juice and usually drifting off. Severus was sure she’d sleep for a week when they took her home. She barely made it through her bath at night before drifting off.

 

Dinner was in the hotel, taking advantage of the buffet; they were simply too tired and content to worry about going somewhere else. The food was good, the atmosphere great, and they could easily get to bed when they’d had enough.

 

After dinner, the hotel put on entertainment. Miri loved the kids club, holiday reps dancing around with the little ones. It delighted her that she could now stand and dance with them, and Harry was sure he and Severus had taken enough pictures to fill a whole room just of Miri dancing.

 

After the kids club came the hired acts. Miri happily snuggled into her daddy and watched with them as each night someone performed onstage. One night was an acrobatic group, complete with a contortionist who could bend in eye watering ways. Another night were some dancers who demonstrated over a dozen different dances. One memorable night was an animal act; snakes and birds and dogs, all trained to perform. Harry giggled as the boa constrictor complained at him of how bored she was.

 

Harry snuggled into Severus on their last night, toying with his fingers. They’d packed their suitcases and ordered a wakeup call and the coach to the airport would pick them up just after breakfast. Miri was asleep in her crib and the two of them were curled together on the sofa, watching the stars through the open balcony doors.

 

“Severus?” Harry whispered.

 

“Yes, love?”

 

“Can we do this again? Go on holiday again?”

 

Severus turned him a little until he was on his back, the taller man leaning over him and joining their lips. Harry whimpered beneath him, tangling his fingers in his hair and the front of his pyjamas. He held Harry close, as if he could undo all the damage the Dursley’s had done.

 

He knew it was impossible. Harry wouldn’t be who he was without his experiences, and Severus would never want to change him, he loved him just the way he was. But he hated knowing his lover had suffered.

 

“I promise,” Severus vowed. “There will be many more holidays in the future.”

 

“Can they be to other places? Can we see other places?”

 

“As many as we can.”

 

“And when Miri’s older, maybe we could go without her. Like…just the two of us.”

 

Severus grinned. “A belated honeymoon would be pleasant. Some secluded paradise, just us two. Hot sun, sandy beaches, claiming in interesting places.”

 

“Sounds good,” Harry said, toying with the buttons of Severus’ pyjama top. “When Miri’s older though. After he’s been caught.”

 

“They will catch him, Harry,” Severus assured. “No one is invincible. He’ll be caught, and then there will be no more need for you to worry about him. He’s going straight to Azkaban.”

 

Harry nodded and snuggled serenely into his arms. Severus knew they wouldn’t be having sex, the night had a different kind of feel to it. He found himself happily content to hold his little sprite, knowing that the morning will take them back to real life. Waiting for them are exams and housework, Lucius and possible bad press. But, for tonight, Severus couldn’t bring himself to worry.

 

He just wanted that one last night.

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Harry and Severus returned from their vacation at lunchtime on a Wednesday, to rain and the happy greetings of their family.

 

Miri was the first in, toddling off to the kitchen while her parents were hauling in the suitcases.

 

“Look at you!” Remus cried, squatting down for her as she giggled and chanted his name. “There’s my clever girl!”

 

They all laughed as she stood in the middle of the floor and put her hands over her wide smiling mouth, squealing behind her fingers, before she toddled straight into Remus’ arms.

 

Sirius was the first to hug Harry, gushing over how tanned he was, how rested both of them were, how happy he was to have them home.

 

“So? How was it?” Molly asked as she sliced tomatoes for sandwiches.

 

“It was great,” Harry said. “Beautiful. Did you get the letter?”

 

“We did,” Anne said. “It looked gorgeous. Was the food good?”

 

“Amazing,” he said, accepting Miri as she reached for him. “Wasn’t it, baby?”

 

“Num num,” she said with a smile. “Lunch, peas.”

 

“Oh, she’s come on so well,” Charlie said as he set up her highchair for Harry.

 

“Yeah, she’s really come so far in the last few days,” Harry agreed as he strapped her in and accepted a bib from Sirius. “I’m sorry you all missed it.”

 

“Don’t be silly, pup,” Remus assured as Molly set a huge plate of sandwiches on the table. “You deserve a holiday as much as anyone. And she’s your baby, so the important part is that you get to see these milestones as they happen.”

 

They sat down to lunch, the family listening to Harry and Severus tell them all about their week in the sun. Everyone was thrilled with their gifts, and they spent the afternoon putting everything to rights, starting with unpacking.

 

“We were only gone for a week,” Severus said as he emptied out his suitcase. “How can we have amassed this much laundry?”

 

“Who knows,” Molly said.

 

“I really do appreciate it. I can wash this all myself if it’s an imposition.”

 

“Nonsense,” she said with a smile as she sorted lights from darks. “It’s no bother. Severus, I have been meaning to ask you…”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Have Solarin’s periods always been so irregular? And painful? Poor thing was really suffering while you were gone.”

 

“Hmmm. Not to my knowledge,” he said, leaning against the counter and looking over at his sister, who was chatting animatedly with Harry. Both of them had their daughters in their arms, Dorian happily playing at the table with some of the new toys and munching on some of the candy Severus and Harry had brought back.

 

“How old was she when she had her first?”

 

“Twelve,” Severus said, thinking back. “She was fairly average. Poppy didn’t see a problem.”

 

“Has she ever complained of them being difficult?”

 

“Molly, it is different for you, you are a woman. I’m sure Ginny and Hermione feel very comfortable talking about this subject with you. But I am her cantankerous big brother. The only time Solarin ever discussed her womanly problems was when she needed products. I vaguely remember brief mentions of pain potions, but nothing more. She didn’t want to talk about it, and I was too mortified to ask.”

 

“Say no more,” she assured. “Arthur is the same.”

 

Severus chuckled and made his way over to Dorian, looking at his picture.

 

“Oh, that’s very good,” he said and the little boy beamed up at him. “Is that one you?”

 

“Uh huh. And that’s mummy, and that one’s daddy. I still got to do Daven,” he said. “Can I have anothew lolly pop?”

 

Severus quickly glanced at Solarin. “Of course you can,” he said once she nodded. “Which one would you like?”

 

Dorian peered into the jar he held out and plucked up a green one, which Severus knew was apple flavour and not lime. Severus himself selected a red cherry flavoured one, and then started on his own picture. He managed to get a little stick figure of Miri in before Sirius caught his attention.

 

“I was wondering how he took it,” Sirius prompted as they settled in Severus’ lab. “The travelling, the new people.”

 

“He did wonderfully,” Severus assured as he looked over the potions Remus had been watching for him. “Remus did beautifully with these. Maybe I should start paying him.”

 

“That’s between you and your god. He was really okay?”

 

“Sirius, do you know that you sound like a neurotic father? You must feel so satisfied and accomplished.”

 

“You’re an arse sometimes.”

 

“I wouldn’t be me if I weren’t. Now. Harry did fine on the plane, found it a little cramped, but I think everyone does. He loved the resort, and the pool. He slept well, he relaxed, and the food! He hasn’t eaten so much since Lucius took him.”

 

Sirius breathed a sigh of relief and actually hugged Severus.

 

They never spoke of it.

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

One simple trip to the supermarket. One simple trip. Sirius wasn’t quite sure of all the steps that led them to St Mungo’s.

 

“No, the green ones never get eaten,” Remus said, motioning to the apples in Solarin’s hands as he pressed the pacifier between Daven’s lips.

 

“These?” she asked, holding up a bag of Pink Lady apples.

 

“Perfect. So what would you do?”

 

“About Charlie and Nixie?” He nodded as she picked out bananas. “Remus, I’ve known Charlie a long time. A very long time. He’s one of the good ones. Nixie loves him, and he loves her. He treats her right. I’m not quite seeing the problem.”

 

“Is it right to allow them to share a bed? She’s only seventeen,” he said, pushing the cart.

 

“But she’s not any seventeen year old,” she said, adding in a few loaves of bread.

 

“It’s a bad parenting move, right?” Sirius pressed.

 

“Stop, both of you. She’s happy and healthy, the rest is up to you. Who cares what anyone thinks? She’s your daughter. What do you want to do? Do we need jam?”

 

“It’s on the list,” Sirius said. “I don’t know what we want to do. Can’t I lock her away from the world?”

 

“No,” she said simply. “Strawberry or mixed fruit?”

 

“Strawberry,” Remus said, picking out peanut butter. “So you don’t think we’re failures as parents and human beings if we let it keep happening?”

 

“Can you hear yourselves?” she asked with a grin as Dorian scampered up with a tube of Pringles. Sirius lifted him so he could dunk them in the cart. “Dorian, tell Sirius and Remus that they’re very silly.”

 

“Silly Billies,” he piped. “Why they silly, mummy?”

 

“Because they’re worrying over nothing.”

 

“That is silly. Can we get hotdogs?”

 

“Come on, little man,” Sirius said. “We’ll go get the hotdog buns.”

 

“Sol, I think she’s hungry,” Remus said as Daven began to fuss. “Can I?”

 

“Sure. Let me just…”

 

She rummaged in the baby bag and produced a bottle of formula as he lifted the month old baby out of the padded seat and cradled her close. Solarin held the bottle and heated her hand to warm the milk before testing it on her wrist.

 

“There’s a girl,” Remus cooed as she latched onto the teat, blinking up at him. “Such a good girl.”

 

“Careful,” she warned as they entered the cereal aisle. “Sirius might worry you want to adopt another one. I think he’s stressed enough with the two you have.”

 

“No, no, my two are enough stress. I just like to borrow a little one every now and then. Speaking of Siri…what do I do about Canis? Sirius wants me to have dinner with the man.”

 

“And you’d rather curse him back to the other side of the planet.”

 

“Exactly. What do I do?”

 

“Well, it’s just dinner. How bad could it be? Do we need cornflakes?”

 

“No, we’re fine for those. The chocolate ones we need.” He watched Daven feed for a while before he spoke. “I hate him. What he did to Sirius…I can’t get past it.”

 

“No one is asking you to,” Sirius said as he and Dorian put their multiple choices in the cart, including a huge box of cream cakes and four different kinds of donut. “Remus, honey, no one is asking you to forget everything. Or forgive it. I just want you to have a meal with him. He’s my father. You’re my husband. I want you to have a meal with him. Am I asking so much?”

 

“Siri…” he whined as Solarin took the baby from him to burp. “It’s not about you asking too much. I’d give you the world if I could, you know that. I just feel that this request may be beyond my abilities. Right now, I can’t imagine sharing a coffee with the man, let alone a meal.”

 

“Start with the coffee,” Sirius begged. “Just think about a coffee with him.”

 

“I’ll think about it,” Remus promised as he ignored Dorian picking up a box of cake mix. “Just don’t push.”

 

They continued around the store, picking up all the things the family needed and many things they wanted, including an almost obscene amount of chocolate. Chocolate puddings, cereals, milkshake mix, cookies. Far too much ice cream in a whole rainbow of flavours. Not even a family as big as theirs could get through that much ice cream.

 

It was a good thing they, as a family, were very financially secure, because the total at the register was enough to give anyone sticker shock. They paid and bagged before making their way out to the parking lot.

 

The car was a new addition to the family. It had once belonged to the Ministry, but they decided to update their motor vehicles and put the old ones up for auction. According to Sirius, he’d gotten it for an absolute bargain. No one was quite convinced. But it was a very nice car. A white BMW X3, it had a huge boot, which was perfect for the weekly shop.

 

The jars of stir in sauce shattered as they hit the concrete, Remus choking as a huge muscular hand wrapped around his throat.

 

“No!” Sirius screamed.

 

“Did you really think I wouldn’t find you?” a greasy voice growled in his ear as Remus fought for breath, nails scratching at the thick skin of his sire.

 

Sirius was helpless as Fenrir Greyback choked his beloved Remus. He was huge, at least seven feet tall, muscles bulging and hair thick on his arms and chest and face. He was filthy, grease matting his hair to his head and making his skin shine with it. His wild golden eyes leered at Sirius as he grabbed Remus’ wand and threw it across the parking lot, and Remus choked out a gagging sound as his hairy hand grabbed between his legs.

 

“Stop it, just let him go!” Sirius demanded, powerless. He couldn’t use magic. Any spell or charm he used could hit Remus, and he couldn’t risk it.

 

“And why would I do that, runt? He’s mine. I made him. He has always been mine, and he always will be mine,” Greyback said with a disgusting smile. “Always and forever.”

 

Solarin crouched behind the car and wrapped Daven in Dorian’s grasp.

 

“Baby, listen,” she whispered. “I need you to take care of your sister. Can you be a big boy and do that for me?”

 

“Yes,” he whispered, nodding and clutching the baby.

 

“Good. I need you to take Daven and go back to the supermarket. Find the security man and tell him you’re lost. We will come and find you, I promise.”

 

[Okay, mummy. I go now?]

 

She nodded and pressed a kiss to each of their foreheads before letting go of him. He scurried off, not looking back, focussed completely on keeping his sister safe.

 

Solarin leaned against the car for a moment, praying her children would be safe.

 

[Bill. Bill. BILL!]

 

[Arin? What’s wrong?]

 

[Fenrir Greyback found us, he has Remus by the throat. Send help.]

 

Bill sounded devastated and terrified, and she got flashes of him running, the image of a fireplace flashing into her mind.

 

[Solarin, where are you? Tell me where you are.]

 

[The supermarket, the usual one.]

 

[We’re coming, baby. Just hold on.]

 

She took a deep breath and began crawling around the car, trying to do something to help. She didn’t want to kill Greyback. No matter what he’d done, she refused to become the thing the Ministry had made of her.

 

His mind was a mess, closer to what she felt from Remus and Sam on the full moon. He was barely human, and it scared her in the way Lucius had scared her as a child. With a human mind, she could usually tell where things were leading.

 

Fenrir Greyback had her working blind.

 

Sirius was begging to every deity he could think of that Remus would be okay. He didn’t think he could handle it if something happened to his sweet wolf. He felt his teeth sharpen and Greyback laughed.

 

“Really? You challenging me? Dog?”

 

“You have your hands on my mate,” Sirius snarled, shifting his feet, mind working as he tried to find an opening.

 

“My pup,” he corrected, fondling Remus below the waist, and Remus whimpered.

 

The smaller werewolf only had strength enough for fighting one assault, the one on his throat, compromising his air, or the one on his cock, compromising his stomach. He decided air was more important and kept scrabbling at the huge hand.

 

Solarin rounded the bumper of the car, her gaze fixed on Fenrir, and then screamed as a hand clawed into her hair, rending her scalp as she was hauled to her feet.

 

“Well, well, well, what have we here? A little garden snake for me to play with,” Bellatrix cackled and Sirius swore. “How is the traitor? Does he miss my master?”

 

“Go to hell,” Solarin hissed.

 

“Oh, I’ve been there. Fifteen years, and I stayed loyal,” she snarled, yanking Solarin’s head back at an unnatural angle. “Fifteen years and I never wavered.”

 

“Same your sanity can’t say the same.”

 

“You always have been a stuck up little bitch.”

 

Solarin screamed as something was rubbed into her eyes. It burned, blinding her. Something was poured down her throat, a huge gush of liquid. There was so much of it, making it hard to breathe, impossible to make any sound other than pained gasps.

 

Her back hit the floor as Sirius screamed, his knees buckling under the blow to them, blood pouring from the place he’d been hit. He got a flash of red hair before his assailant moved to pin him to the ground, knee digging sadistically into his wounds. A hand was fisted into his hair and his face smashed into the asphalt.

 

Remus watched in horror as his mate was pinned, and he found himself irrationally angry about the blood in Sirius’ hair. It was Remus’ to play with, to keep clean, to tangle his fingers in, and this woman Remus had never seen before shouldn’t touch it.

 

Solarin was letting out little choked sounds, struggling to breathe but still unable to remain silent as Bellatrix began to carve into her arm with an ornate dagger.

 

“See, little one?” Fenrir growled in his ear, close, intimate, like a lover. “There is nothing you can do to stop us. And when we’re done here with you and your little runts, we’ll find those little ones you had.” He buried his nose in Remus’ neck and took a deep breath. “Oh, you were holding them. They smell so sweet on you. A little boy, and a baby girl. How nice. You remember how I like little ones, don’t you?”

 

“No,” he ground out, jerking against the hands touching him to no effect. “Leave them alone.”

 

Remus gasped in air as he was thrown down, face to the floor. He tried to scramble away as his trousers were ripped off. Fenrir grabbed him by the back of the neck, applying enough pressure that Remus was afraid to move, fearing the snap of his neck if he did. A rough hand pressed between his thighs and one was shoved roughly, exposing him. He sobbed as a thick finger was shoved within him, and he felt something tear, caught on a thick claw.

 

Solarin gagged as the potion she’d been half drowned in began to work. She felt her control shatter. It was so loud, there were so many of them, all around. Angry, sad, lonely, distraught, worried, elated. Old, young, male, female, witch, wizard, Muggle.

 

She fought against it, struggling under Bellatrix’s weight as it pressed her into the cold hard ground.

 

Bill skidded to a stop, wand out, and blasted Bellatrix across the parking lot, sending her careening into an oncoming car. Moody took on Fenrir, scorching him with flames and sending him running, while Arthur went for the red-haired witch on Sirius. He ignored magic completely, punching her hard in the face.

 

“Arin, Arin, baby, talk to me,” Bill begged as he helped her up, stroking her hair.

 

[Can’t. Drowning,] she sent and his grip tightened as he got a look at what the potion had done.

 

“Oh, shit,” he muttered. “Okay, okay, just…don’t _do_ anything. Just stay still and…breathe! Yes, breathing is good. Dad!”

 

Arthur left Sirius to Charlie and ran over.

 

“Bellatrix gave her something, it shattered her control. Opiate, she was given Opiate. Dad, she hurt me. She can’t stop herself.”

 

“Alright, we’ll do something. Take her to St Mungo’s, take her to Sam, tell him what you told me. We’re right behind you.”

 

[Dorian. Daven,] she said, trying to keep it contained and failing.

 

“Where are they?” Bill asked, pushing down his nausea.

 

[Security guard, inside.]

 

“Dad, the kids are inside, with the security guard.”

 

“On it,” Fred said before running inside.

 

“Okay, honey, hold on,” Bill said, gathering Solarin into his arms. She whimpered as her arm was jostled.

 

Bill Apparated to the hospital, where Sam was waiting. He took her from Bill and laid her on a gurney, and Solarin’s panic literally knocked them on their arses.

 

“Solarin, calm down,” Bill said, stroking her hair as Sam hauled himself up off the floor.

 

“No. No. No,” she begged, her voice raw. [No. No. No.]

 

“Move,” Severus ordered and Bill jumped out of his way. “Easy, sweetheart. You’re not going to die here, I promise. You only look like mum, you are not actually her. Come on, come with me.”

 

Severus picked her up and he looked to Sam who led the way. By the time they reached the emergency cubicles, Sirius and Remus were already there, being patched up by Jack and another healer.

 

Remus was laying on his side as the potion coating his insides started to work, healing the tear. His throat was one big bruise, and beneath the gown he was wearing were more bruises. Sirius was absolutely certain there would be no mating until they faded.

 

Sirius was on his front as Jack repaired the tendons in his legs the witch had sliced through. He couldn’t feel any pain, just the sick tugging as he was stitched up. Once he was stitched back together, potions would be applied, but the pieces needed to be together first.

 

“I’m putting you on a bed,” Severus said. “It does not look very comfortable, but it is a bed, so behave, young lady.”

 

She nodded as he set her down and Sam went to work.

 

First off he hooked her up to a dialysis machine, trying to filter the potion out of her system without the aid of magic. If he used any, Solarin’s own magic could blow the building up. Once it was running, he flushed out her eyes.

 

“It’s nothing dangerous,” he said, looking at what he’d removed. “Looks like salt.” He swabbed some up. “I’ll get the lab to check it, but it doesn’t seem to be doing any lasting damage. How’re the peepers?”

 

“They sting,” she admitted. “But I can kind of see you now. Where are my children?”

 

“In the Children’s Ward with Arthur,” Severus said. “They’re both fine. Fred pulled off the idiot uncle act very well.”

 

“Sol, I’m going to look at your arm,” Sam warned.

 

“Don’t sugar coat it,” she said.

 

He peeled away the gauze he’d covered it with and began to carefully clean away the blood. Eventually, they could see what Bellatrix had carved into her lily-white skin.

 

“It says ‘TRAITOR’,” Sam said. “And there’s some kind of residue in it.” He took another sample swab and added it to the other one going to the lab. “I’m going to stitch this, and then have a crack with some murtlap, but I’m not feeling confident.”

 

“Just stitch,” Severus said. “We’ll worry about it when her arm is not a gaping wound. Clean and stitch, clean and stitch.”

 

“I’m cleaning, I’m stitching.”

 

“Okay, explain this to me,” Sirius said from his bed across the medical bay. His arm was stretched across the space between him and Remus, their fingers entwined.

 

“Explain what?” Bill asked.

 

“It was one trip to the supermarket. I was worried about donuts and ice cream. How did we end up being playthings?”

 

“I still want my ice cream,” Remus grouched, his voice raw. “I demand it.”

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Severus crawled onto the bed and curled around his lover, holding him close, pressing kisses to his neck.

 

“Would you care to talk?” Severus whispered.

 

Harry shook his head.

 

“Very well. Shall we just lay here for a while?”

 

A nod of the head.

 

“All right, love. Miri is in the playroom with Molly and the other little ones. As long as you need.”

 

Harry nodded absently and they stayed curled up for the next few hours. Distantly they heard voices below, but Harry just gripped Severus tighter when he tried to move. Eventually Harry rolled over and buried his face in Severus’ chest.

 

Finally, Harry let out a moan and began to cry. Slow at first, and then full out sobs as Severus held him close.

 

“That’s it, Harry,” he soothed. “Let it out, sweetheart. It’s okay.”

 

“They could have killed them,” Harry cried between high whines of fear and remembered pain. “They tried to take them from me.”

 

“I know, but they didn’t. Harry, look at me. Come on, love, look at me.” Harry untangled himself and met his gaze, though he couldn’t stop his tears. “Yes, the events of today were not good things. But all three of them are fine. Sam isn’t even keeping them overnight. That’s probably them downstairs.”

 

“But they got hurt, they could have died!”

 

“Yes, they could have, but they didn’t. And the witch that hurt Sirius is in custody.” Severus tangled his fingers in the messy locks and pulled Harry into a kiss, which was enthusiastically returned. Before he knew it, Harry had taken complete control of the kiss.

 

“It’s my fault,” Harry whispered as he let Severus go.

 

“No. In no way is this your fault.”

 

“They’re free because of him, and he’s on the rampage because of me! Why couldn’t I just give him the son he wants? Then he’d leave us all alone!”

 

“Harry, stop it,” Severus barked. “This is not your fault, none of it. And you know why you didn’t give him a son. You can only bear a son if the sire can in fact make one. He can’t. If he could, Miri would be a Dylan.”

 

“But…”

 

“No. Just…no. I refuse to listen to you blame yourself for this! Even if Miri had been a boy, do you truly believe any of us would have let you hand a poor innocent child to that sadistic son of a bitch? Harry, would you ever hand a child to Lucius?”

 

“No…”

 

“Then for the love of Merlin, shut up! You’re beating yourself up over something that you never would have done anyway. Just stop.”

 

“I can’t,” Harry admitted. “Everything he does, everything his friends do…every single time, I feel like it’s my fault.”

 

“Harry, listen to me, just this once. I know you love to argue with me, but, just this once, just listen. Harry, what Lucius and his friends do is in no way a reflection of you. You did not break them out of prison. You did not decide to kidnap an underage wizard, keep him prisoner, and rape him repeatedly. You did not decide to murder anyone. Thus, if none of those things were your decision, then they cannot, logically, be your fault. What happened today was a result of the choices other people made. Not you.”

 

“None of that was my choice, but I still feel guilty. And I don’t know how to stop.”

 

“That is because Petunia and Vernon destroyed any self-confidence you ever had,” Severus said firmly. He sighed and stroked Harry’s hair. “They spent the formative years of your life telling you how worthless you were. Are you truly surprised that it is still ingrained in you?”

 

“I guess not.”

 

“Harry, my love, my husband, my sweet little lion, you could not truly look at yourself in the mirror until very recently. The Dursley’s were very thorough. But I am very determined to make you see how much you are worth.”

 

“What if I never do? What if I always think of myself like this?”

 

“Then that is the way it is, but I shall never stop arguing with you about it.”

 

“You still love me, even though I think I’m pathetic and worthless? Even though I still think I’m a freak?” Harry whispered.

 

“Harry, I will still love you even if the world stops turning. I will love you forever and beyond, and there is nothing that could stop it.”

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Charlie looked over his paperwork one last time to make sure he hadn’t missed anything. He had his application, his references, his qualifications, it was all there. Even his certificate of health from Sam.

 

Now all he had to do was ace the interview.

 

“Charles Weasley?”

 

“Yes, that’s me,” he said as he leapt to his feet and shook hands with the absolutely tiny blonde woman. “Please, call me Charlie.”

 

“Charlie it is. I’m Mikaela Starlight, one of the Senior Keepers. Shall we?” she said, motioning to the door that led to the main open area.

 

He had never met anyone so tiny and fragile looking with such a high position of power, but Harry’s tiny and he defeated the Dark Lord. There’s a whole lot of substance packed into tiny packages.

 

The Welsh Dragon Reserve was beautiful, all wide open expanses of green, plenty of hidden caves for the creatures to nest in, huge lakes and winding rivers. It was dragon paradise. There were even herds of animals roaming so the dragons could hunt for themselves. The aim was to keep the environment as natural as possible, to minimise interventions used on the huge creatures. On a day like that, with the sky a beautiful clear blue with fluffy clouds skittering across, it belonged on postcards.

 

“I have to say, I was very excited to hear that you were looking to join our team,” Mikaela said as they walked. “I have colleges in Romania who’ve told me how good you are.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“According to our records, you applied for our scholarship programme, and then trained in Romania. Can I ask why?”

 

“Financial reasons. Without the scholarship I just couldn’t afford to train here. So I applied for the Romanian one and got accepted.”

 

She took him on a tour of the Reserve, pointing out the nesting sites, the favoured hunting grounds, the conservation and breeding work that they did. It was the most reputable dragon conservation project in the world, and the criteria for the scholarships were strict as hell. Charlie had missed out on it by a single point.

 

They finished up the tour and she took him back to the main building and they settled at her desk.

 

“Okay, let’s get right down to it,” she said. She shuffled through his papers, making a few notes on a spare piece of parchment. “Your health records are all good, no major health issues or injuries. I can’t seem to find any record of major burns.”

 

“I’ve not had any. A few that were pretty painful, but nothing that would really disfigure or leave an issue.”

 

“Very nice. Sign of a good handler. No allergies?”

 

“None that I’m aware of.”

 

“You’ve noted here that your reason for leaving the Romanian Reserve is ‘personal reasons’. Care to elaborate?”

 

“There were some incidents, my family needed me here in the UK.”

 

“Can I assume that to be why you’ve noted you would prefer not to live on-site?”

 

“Partly. Yes, I need to be able to be nearer my family. But I’ve also got a girlfriend, and I think it would be a little unfair to her if I lived in Wales while she’s in London.”

 

“Such things do tend to put a strain on a relationship,” she said, like a woman who had been there. “Okay, screw all the questions I’m supposed to ask. Why dragons? You’re talented, intelligent. You could have picked any career in the world. Merlin knows there are safer ones. Why dragons?”

 

Charlie smiled to himself. “When I was a little boy, my mum used to read me the story of St George and the Dragon. And my brothers, they’ve all identified with the knight. Me? I just wanted to get close to something that incredibly primal. Dragons are beautiful and dangerous. They’re fierce, wild, there’s no taming them. And I just always wanted to be a part of that.”

 

She smiled at him wistfully. “Been a long while since anyone interviewing here had that kind of love for dragons. You’re obviously very passionate about the species. Do you have a preference in breed?”

 

“Not at all. They’re all good in their own different ways. Really, it’s not about the breed. It’s the dragon itself, the personality.”

 

“Any age range you prefer to work with?”

 

“I like the babies, obviously. Hatchling and nestling. But juveniles are probably my favourite. It’s where they really start to show their personalities, try to figure out hierarchies and all that but they’re still playful. It’s usually when they’re clumsiest too, when they’re really growing into their wings.”

 

“Says here that you have a particular affinity for nesting females,” she said, glancing at his application and references. “Can I get you to elaborate on that?”

 

“It’s a weird thing we noticed, that the females weren’t as aggressive towards me as to the others. After a few nests, I even managed to get close enough to inspect the eggs. No one can figure out why, but it meant that our breeding dragons produced more live hatchlings than usual. One of the older tamers joked that I was a Whisperer.”

 

“That’s fantastic. We’ve had two handlers who could do that in the past, but none in the last ten years or so. It would be wonderful to have one again.”

 

They went through the rest of the interview and then took a break for lunch before Charlie was collected from the dining room by a wizard who had to be an ex-beater.

 

“I was as it happens, in my school days,” he said with a heavy southern American drawl. “Boston Academy of Magic. Wish I could’ve gone to Hogwarts, but them’s the dice. Hatton Peterson, at your service.”

 

Charlie shook his rough hand.

 

“Now, I hear you do well with nesters.”

 

“I have in the past.”

 

“Good. That is Marybelle, my baby. She started nesting last week, but we have no clue how many she’s laid, if she’s laid any,” he said, motioning to a bright green dragon.

 

“Welsh Green?”

 

“Yup.”

 

Charlie looked at the dragon, craning his head this way and that. “I’d hazard a guess…nine years old?”

 

“Correct.”

 

“By the looks of her, the male tried to get close, set her on edge. Her first lay?”

 

“Very first. She had a false last season.”

 

Charlie nodded and began to slowly make his way forwards, stopping a healthy distance away from her and sitting down. He plucked a few blades of grass and began to braid them, adding more and more the longer he sat there.

 

Marybelle roared and screeched at him and few times and then watched him confusedly.

 

Charlie waited, and eventually the curiosity got the best of her. She slowly shuffled out of her nest and closer to him, ducking her huge head to look at him. She shoved at him with her nose a few times before retreating to her nest once more and watched to see what he’d do.

 

Marybelle had chosen to make her nest in the open, which was unusual, but not unheard of for a first time nesting. Charlie hauled himself up and strolled closer, stopping to lean against a rock, crouching down to grab some daisies to weave in to his grass chain.

 

Finally, Charlie approached her, holding out a hand and murmuring soft words.

 

“Hey, there. Pretty girl. I’m not going to hurt you, just come to say hello,” he said carefully. “I’d very much like it if I got this job. If I get it, I’ll bring you some ducks, how about that? Or maybe you like berries? Some of my Romanian dragons liked fruit. I’ll bring you strawberries if I get the job. A whole feast for you, beautiful. That’s it.”

 

She ducked her head and let him run a hand over her scaled nose, opening her great jaw and letting out a noise that was somewhere between a whine and a growl.

 

“Oh, I know. This nesting business is hard work. And you’re such a pretty girl. I bet you’ve got all the boys running after you. Have they come sniffing? Is that what’s wrong? I know, us boys can be very annoying. But you’re a good girl, you’re going to keep those babies safe.”

 

As he stroked her, she continued to let out the noises, as if she was talking with him, complaining about everything that was bothering her. While he petted the dragon, he managed to get a look at what she was protecting.

 

Her nest was a dug out bowl in the earth, ringed by pretty white rocks that had been picked from the surrounding boulders. Marybelle had padded it with grass and leaves and a healthy heap of daffodils. Currently, there was a single egg being heated by the heat of her body. A nice healthy size, roughly the size of a Quaffle but tapered at both ends.

 

As he stood there, she let out a high wail and squatted over the bowl, straining. Amazingly, as he stood there, this brand new human in her enclosure, she laid another two eggs, purring as he scratched her in praise. They hissed with heat as they joined the first egg.

 

He spent a little more time with her, before he carefully backed away and returned to Hatton.

 

“She’s got three so far, but she might lay more. In my opinion, she’s got another two at least to drop, maybe three, but no more than that. Pretty large for a first clutch.”

 

“I’m impressed. Come on, next hurdle.”

 

Charlie was led to a broom and the two of them flew to another part of the reserve and approached another dragon.

 

“Tell me what you get from this one,” Hatton directed and Charlie approached the beast.

 

This one was bright red, with a fringe of golden spikes around its face and unquestionably male.

 

“Chinese Fireball, male, I’d guess at around thirty years, maybe thirty five. Unsheathed penis. Been near to a female, tried to mate within the last few hours.” He noted the sluggishly bleeding wounds on the side of his neck and along his left flank. “Did he get near to a nesting female?”

 

“This morning, Marybelle.”

 

“He tried breeding her?”

 

“She didn’t take kindly to it.”

 

“Poor guy.” He slowly approached and then once again sat on the ground and waited until the huge red nose nudged at him. He followed the dragon back to his chosen spot and held out a hand until his nose was shoved into it and the dragon moaned at him.

 

“I know, women are hard. They give you all these signals and then change their minds and you’re the one who gets hit. I know, I’ve been there.” He looked at the wounds. “Don’t worry, you’ll heal up fine. Few days and you can go chase another one. Stay far from Marybelle for a while, though.”

 

Eventually the dragon was happy enough to let Charlie leave and he once again joined Hatton, who was smiling.

 

“Okay, colour me impressed. His name is Zion. We’re all wondering what he and Marybelle will make.”

 

“He’s the father?”

 

“Yup. We were shocked when we came across them mating. Never happened before, a Fireball and a Green. And she’s only just reached the age. Caught us all by surprise.”

 

“We managed to breed an Opaleye and a Swedish once. Ugliest hatchlings I’d ever seen. We were waiting for something blue and pearlescent. We got this muddy brown dried blood kind of colour with a snout like a pug.”

 

Hatton laughed as they mounted their brooms once more and headed back to the main building. Hatton led him through to another building, the inside of which was hotter than hell.

 

“Nursery?” Charlie asked and Hatton nodded.

 

“Eggs abandoned by their mama’s. We try to hatch as many as we can, keep the populations constant. You ever hand rear one?”

 

“Once. Hatched too early and its mother was young. He’s now a happy nestling with a foster mother.”

 

Hatton gave him a tour around the building, pointing out their incubators (complete with 24 hour furnace), their hatchlings, the ones that were nursing on brandy and chicken blood. Then he took Charlie on a tour around the dorm building, which was a lot nicer than the one in Romania. The redhead got to meet the other members of staff, who were a friendly bunch.

 

“How did he do?” Mikaela asked as they re-joined her in the main building.

 

“He’s got the spark,” Hatton said. “Real talent. Marybelle and Zion both took to him. And the hatchlings! I thought they’d never let him leave they were curled so tight around him.”

 

She let out a long whistle.

 

“Never thought I’d see the day I met a Whisperer. I was starting to think they were a myth.”

 

Hatton left them to it and Charlie was handed a packet of papers.

 

“I feel pretty confident about you,” Mikaela said as she loaded a quill with ink. “Natural talent with the dragons, Hatton likes you and he’s a great judge of character, you’ve got great references. I’d like to offer you a position with us, on a probationary period. Six months and then we reassess. Within those six months you cannot quit without notice, and you will be required to do some overnight shifts, where you’ll need to be onsite. Is that something you can get on board with?”

 

“Absolutely.”

 

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Bellatrix ducked as the lamp was thrown her way. Fenrir was huddled in a corner, cradling his broken wrist.

 

“Did I not tell you to lay low?” Lucius roared. “Did I not make it clear that I have plans for those little do-gooders? And now look! Aurors on us! And you lost Amelia!”

 

A book was thrown at Bellatrix’s hip and she hissed as the corner caught her, drawing blood.

 

“We told her not to come,” Fenrir growled. “We told her to stay, but she insisted. Said she was bored.”

 

“And you just rolled over and showed your belly, like a fucking pup.”

 

“She’s a grown woman, I’m not telling her what to do.”

 

“No, the ones telling her what to do are the Ministry. They’ll be asking all sorts of questions, which means we need to leave. All because you couldn’t do as you were fucking told!”

 

Fenrir got to his feet and advanced on the blond, teeth bared. “I am not your pet.”

 

“No, a pet is worth something to me,” Lucius said, waving his wand and snapping the other wrist. “You are just a worthless mongrel I picked up at the pound. And if you don’t start doing as you’re told, you’ll be going straight back there. And as for you.”

 

Bellatrix recoiled as he rounded on her. Lucius hadn’t allowed any of them wands, not even his precious little Amelia.

 

Amelia had been a small redheaded witch Lucius had met in Knockturn Alley. Her brother had been a Death Eater sent to Azkaban and given the Kiss on the testimony of Harry Potter.

 

“Two decades and still you’re angry at that little witch,” Lucius hissed. “Twenty years and you just can’t let it go, the actions of a scared child. That witch is dangerous! That witch has carte blanch to kill us all if so much as a finger is raised against her and you decided to force a potion down her throat and carve into her arm! Tell me, my dear Bella. What was it you rubbed into her eyes?”

 

“Salt.”

 

“Salt. Into the eyes of a witch that can make you cut off your own air supply. And the word you carved into her arm? Which was that?”

 

“Traitor. It was for Severus!”

 

“Hmmm. And the acid you dipped the blade in? Tell me what it was.”

 

“Battery acid, from a Muggle car.”

 

“To match her Muggle blood, I see. And, my dear Bellatrix, my little raven, is there any Augur Opiate left in my stores?”

 

“No,” she whispered and he hummed.

 

He was suddenly very calm. Too calm. Too fast. A calm Lucius was something she had learned to be wary of. It never led to anything that would be enjoyed by people other than Lucius.

 

The aristocrat smiled gently, beckoning her closer. She slowly approached and he held her close, stroking her hair.

 

“I do understand,” he crooned, pressing a kiss to her cheek. “It is frustrating for me also. I want my Pet back, I want my life back.” He wound her hair around his fist and slammed her into the table face first.

 

Fenrir started to move towards them but stopped. He had two broken wrists and severe burns. He could be no use.

 

“Do you remember what we learned in school, Bella?” Lucius asked the prone woman. “About consequences.” He pressed himself against her backside and leaned down to kiss her shoulder.

 

“Yes,” she whimpered.

 

Lucius freed himself from his trousers and shoved up the skirt of her dress. She gasped as he pushed into her, fingers scrabbling at the wood.

 

“Tell me what we learned,” he moaned, thrusting hard, making her choke.

 

“All actions have consequences,” she grit out.

 

“Yes. So you deserve the consequences of your actions? Yes? I told you to lay low and you didn’t listen. So you deserve the punishment I shall bestow, yes? You have earned it, haven’t you, Bella?”

 

“I have,” she agreed, breaking off to screech at his rough thrusts. “Lucius, please. I’m sorry. I made a mistake. It won’t happen again. I swear. Please, Lucius. Please.”

 

“Oh, Bella,” he crooned as he emptied himself into her. “I know it won’t happen again. Because you shall not forget this time.”

 

Lucius withdrew as he stabbed his knife through her hand and into the wood. She began to beg in earnest as he pulled out a second knife and lined up with her wrist.

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

The morning of Miri’s first birthday dawned bright and beautiful, with perfect blue skies and beautifully warm weather.

 

Despite her crippling menstrual cramps, Solarin started the morning off by pulling out her mixing bowls right after breakfast. The word on her arm was bright against the pale white of her skin.

 

“I would understand if you weren’t up to this,” Harry said as he retrieved eggs from the fridge. “I mean, if you wanted to spend the day buried in chocolate with a hot water bottle.”

 

“I’m fine. My cycle’s just gone funky,” she said, measuring out sugar. “Damn thing should have finished last week and I’m still heavy. Now, I’m doing chocolate sponge with an orange buttercream filling, covered in orange flavoured fondant with little modelling chocolate figures.”

 

“Sounds amazing.”

 

“Good. So what figures would you like on her cake?”

 

“Can I have something really girly? Like…insanely girly?”

 

“Absolutely. Cream these together for me while I pop to the loo,” she said, motioning to the butter and sugar she’d measured.

 

Harry happily creamed them together, leaning against the counter with the bowl in his arms so he could watch Miri munching away at her breakfast of fruit and cut up crumpets.

 

A year. A whole year. He couldn’t believe his baby girl had been around for a whole twelve months. He remembered how terrified he’d been, how nervous, how unsure. This tiny helpless newborn wanting him to know what to do. Somehow along the way he’d found his footing. He knew so much more now. And she’d grown so much! She was walking and talking, eating real grown up food. She had teeth, she had even learnt to give kisses.

 

The day was bittersweet for Harry. He was proud of his baby, happy she’d reached the milestone. But he couldn’t help but be reminded of how little he’d been when Lily and James had been killed.

 

Miri was so small, so breakable. She needed him so much. He hated the thought of being taken away from her the way Lily had. He watched Severus accept the piece of apple she shoved into his mouth, saying thank you, munching exaggeratedly and making her giggle. She needed Severus just as much as she needed Harry, as much as he’d needed James.

 

“Harry?” Ron prompted as he leaned next to him. “Are you okay?”

 

“Just thinking.”

 

“About what?”

 

“I was just a few months older than Miri is when my mum and dad were killed. I just…she’s so tiny. She needs me and Severus so much.”

 

“Right there with you,” Ron assured, watching as his twins shared crumpets between themselves, poking food into each other’s mouths. It was just what he remembered from Fred and George when they were little.

 

“Ron, can I ask you…if something happens to me and Severus…”

 

“Harry, don’t.”

 

“I need to. Just in case.”

 

“Okay. Just in case.”

 

“If something happens to me and Severus, promise me you’ll take care of her? That she’ll be cared for and loved and never wonder if she’s good enough?”

 

“I promise. Me and Hermione are her godparents, she’ll come to us if something happens. And she’ll be taken care of, I swear. If it comes to it, I’ll love her like one of my own.”

 

“Thank you. And you know me and Severus will take care of them if the worst comes,” Harry promised, motioning to the twins now poking yogurt covered fingers into each other’s mouths and giggling.

 

Solarin returned and liberated her bowl from Harry’s hands.

 

Harry and Ron returned to the table to finish up breakfast, and then the family did what they usually did when the weather was nice and they all wanted to be together.

 

They headed to the garden.

 

Miri happily toddled off to explore the flowers, Dorian ran off to the swing set and the twins crawled off after Miri. The adults set up the huge picnic blanket and cushions, laying Daven under a canopy and lounging around.

 

The good thing about Miri’s first birthday falling on a Saturday was that it meant the family could all be home to enjoy it. Molly and Anne were in the kitchen cooking up all their favourite things, Solarin making the cake, Ginny and Nixie helping, with Fred and George causing all kinds of trouble trying to get bits to nibble on.

 

Solarin appeared with a timer shaped like a strawberry and wasted no time in making herself comfortable on the blanket, laying Daven on her chest. The baby snuffled a few times before settling, as if her mother was the most comfortable mattress in the world.

 

Severus smiled to himself as Miri sprinkled flower petals all over Catherine and Joseph’s heads, the babies giggling and clapping.

 

“Good smile?” Harry asked, pressing a kiss to his neck.

 

Severus cuddled him close, running a hand along his bare shin.

 

“Just looking at Miri, trying to get my head around it. A year ago, she was Daven’s size. Smaller. And now look at her. Walking, talking, her first birthday.” He laughed. “A year. A whole year. It went so fast.”

 

“I know.”

 

Severus pulled him in for a kiss, snaking his tongue inside as Miri ran past them, the twins crawling furiously after the giggling little girl.

 

“I want more,” Severus whispered as they parted. “I want another. Sod it, I want a dozen.”

 

“I’m game,” Harry said with a grin. “I’ll carry whenever you’re ready. I’m good to go, you said I had to wait.”

 

“I know. And we really must wait. You should at least get to finish school first.”

 

Harry giggled and settled himself more comfortably, cuddling in between Severus’ long legs.

 

“Think I’ll have a boy next time?” Harry wondered as Severus handed him a glass of lemonade.

 

“Perhaps,” he said with a smile at Solarin, who was stroking Daven’s bright curls. “I have never fathered a child, I have no clue if I can make boys. But a girl would be fine too. Another little girl. We could create the first female magical dynasty.”

 

“Now you’re pushing it,” Harry chuckled.

 

Sirius was happily setting up the barbecue behind a magical barrier so the little ones couldn’t hurt themselves. He was still sore, his legs feeling like someone had stuck a cheese grater and a feather duster under his skin.

 

“Stop it,” Remus admonished as he reached down to scratch. “It’ll never heal properly if you keep picking at it.”

 

“It itches,” Sirius complained, pouring more charcoal into the huge metal half drum on legs.

 

“I know. But it will get better.”

 

“Remus…”

 

“If you’re about to get sappy on me, please, wait until later,” the werewolf said, threading his fingers into long black hair. He gave him a gentle kiss. “I know that face after a very long time of knowing you. You’re about to get sentimental on me. And I love that you are, and whatever you want to say, I want to hear. But if I’m getting through today with a smile, I can’t hear it right now.”

 

“Okay, honey. Later. You can screw me after I say it, if that makes it easier.”

 

“Now, we both know that you just want sex.”

 

“Absolutely.”

 

“It’s any excuse with you,” Remus purred, kissing his throat. “Never change, sweetheart.”

 

“’Ampa Re’Us!”

 

Remus pulled away and laughed as he spied Miri bashing her hands against the magical barrier. It wouldn’t admit anyone under Hogwarts age, and she wasn’t a fan.

 

“What’s the matter, angel?” Remus asked as he picked her up, carrying her away from the soon-to-be open flames.

 

“Me go cook ‘Ampa Si’Us,” she said determinedly, pointing at where the Animagus was lighting the coals. “I do an’ help.”

 

“Oh, I know you’d be a very good helper for Grandpa Sirius. But Rommy needs someone to play with him,” he said as he carried her over to where the wolf pup was lounging on the blanket. He sat up and his tail wiggled his entire back end.

 

“Rommy!” Miri called as she was set down and Romulus happily joined her, letting her hug him around the neck.

 

Romulus was quick to grab his toys and carry them over to her and the two of them happily set to playing. Miri would throw a ball and the puppy would fetch it, even though she didn’t throw it very far. He was a happy little guy, content to play in any way his humans wanted. He even got along with Crookshanks, when he was there.

 

Before anyone really realised it, Catherine was copying him, fetching the ball and carrying it back to Miri and Joseph in her itty bitty teeth.

 

“Should I be worried that one of my children is treating the other one like a dog?” Hermione wondered as she carried out a platter of uncooked sausages and hamburgers.

 

“It’s a game,” Charlie assured. “We used to do the same thing with Ronnie.”

 

“Shut up, you did not,” Ron scoffed.

 

“We really did,” Fred assured. “It was fun.”

 

“You treated me like a dog! You gits!”

 

“Relax, it was just a game,” George soothed as Oliver tried not to laugh too hard. “We stopped once you started walking. Well. We stopped once dad made us.”

 

Harry was laughing so hard he couldn’t draw breath, happy tears pouring down his face.

 

“Daddy,” Joseph said, handing Ron one of the balls. “Pay, peas.”

 

“Can we play a different game?” Ron pressed. “Huh, JoJo? We can get Cat to throw the balls too!”

 

“No,” Catherine said as she returned the ball to Miri once more. “Cash.”

 

“How about you catch them with your hands? Huh, Kitty Cat?”

 

“No. A fetch ‘ike ‘Ommy!”

 

“Okay, you fetch like Rommy,” he sighed, throwing a ball for the dog and another for his daughter. He looked to his mother as she carried a plate of hot dog rolls over to the barbecue. “Mum?”

 

“Yes, dear?”

 

“She’s going to grow out of this, right?” he whined as she crouched to hug him. “She’s a little girl, not a puppy.”

 

“It’s a game,” Molly assured. “The little ones don’t really see the difference between themselves and Romulus. They will grow out of it. You did.”

 

Miri abandoned the game as Sam appeared with a platter of cut up vegetables and she trundled along, running to him in her funny plodding way.

 

“Sam! Me have petter po-lease!”

 

Sam managed not to laugh too hard as he handed her a piece of red pepper from the platter.

 

“Tank ‘ooo!” she said before she toddled off, nibbling at her prize.

 

Dorian happily made space for her as she joined him at the huge play equipment, hopping off his swing and helping her play on the slide. He was so good with the smaller members of the family. Always willing to play with them, help them along. He was such a content little boy and they all thanked their lucky stars. With the start he’d had in life, he could have gone the complete opposite way, becoming a little terror.

 

Sam and Jack were quick to offer advice to Solarin and Bill, being very clear in how important routine and stability were for a child who had been neglected and abused. Solarin and Bill were very clear in how much they loved Dorian, they told him every day. They were quick to offer praise and comfort, never turning him away when he wanted a cuddle or to show them a picture. They set boundaries for him, making clear what was and wasn’t acceptable behaviour, and what was expected from him.

 

Having a routine was something both of them were very clear on. Solarin had been raised by Severus after all, and she was the stay at home parent. Dorian had breakfast time, lunch time, play time, bath time, bed time and all other times, all clearly laid out for him. He always had Solarin or Bill give him his bath and read him a story while he had a Sippy cup of warm milk and lots of cuddles.

 

The result was a happy little boy.

 

It was all going so well until Miri lost her footing at the top of the slide and fell down it face first, letting out a scream as her face hit the grass.

 

Harry couldn’t hear or see anything but Miri as he launched himself across the garden and scooped her up. His heart was pounding in his chest and he was fairly certain he was going to be sick as she sobbed and clutched at him.

 

“Come on,” Severus urged, putting gentle hands on Harry’s shoulders and guiding him back to the blanket. They sat back down and Severus carefully peeled Miri away from Harry, looking for damage.

 

There was a graze on her forehead and she had some blood coming from her mouth.

 

“It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s okay,” Harry chanted as he rocked and cuddled her.

 

She kept crying and shrieking as Sam swiped a cleaning potion over her forehead and checked her mouth.

 

“She scratched the inside of her lip with her tooth. She’ll be fine. She scared herself more than anything,” Sam promised as he let Miri pick out a plaster.

 

She chose a pink one with cupcakes on it and he applied it to her forehead before she really started complaining.

 

Miri, as it turned out, was not hurt, nor was she scared.

 

She was pissed that the slide had the audacity to hurt her.

 

“Is a bad side!” she screeched, pointing at it and looking at her parents, determined that they should know. “Is bad side, a bad, a hurted me mouse and a ‘ead and a me falled a ouched!”

 

“I know, baby,” Harry soothed. “That wasn’t nice, but it’s okay, you’re okay. Just a scratch.”

 

“Dada, a bad side!”

 

“Yes, darling,” Severus agreed. “Bad slide.”

 

“A side a need time out!”

 

Harry giggled to himself, despite his still churning stomach. “How do we put a slide in time out?”

 

They watched with amusement as Miri used her magic to lift the slide and deposit it in the corner of the garden, apparently ‘facing’ the wall.

 

“A bad side has time out,” Miri declared before snuggling into Harry. Her little fingers wrapped around the lion pendant he wore, toying with it. “Me birday, no has hurted. Has cake!”

 

“Yes, you have cake for your birthday,” Severus agreed while Harry settled himself. “And presents and a pretty new dress.”

 

“Pity dess! Pesents!”

 

Just like that, it was all forgotten.

 

The morning was spent playing and laughing, spending time together and making a fuss of the birthday girl. Soon enough, Sirius had the coals going, and the men gathered around, grilling things.

 

“Must be a guy thing,” Solarin said, watching as Bill, his brothers, their father, Sirius, Remus, Sam, and Jack all argued about the best way to grill steak.

 

“I feel I should be offended on behalf of my gender,” Severus said, Harry nodding.

 

“I’m just saying! I call it as I see it.”

 

“Well, don’t,” Harry said.

 

“Look, you’re only half male, technically, and Severus…you’re…you. All advanced and stoic and put together and stuff.”

 

“You do realise you just generalised about my son’s future,” Hermione pointed out. “And yours.”

 

“Ah, hell, you know what I mean,” Solarin defended. “Look at them. Put them in furs and they’re cavemen.”

 

“We can hear you!” Bill called. “Find us a woolly mammoth!”

 

“I’ll get right on that.”

 

“Dada,” Miri said, toddling over and climbing onto his lap while Dorian followed, Romulus on his heels.

 

“Yes, beautiful.”

 

“Pesents, now, poh-ease.”

 

“Not yet, sweetheart. We’re going to have some lunch and a nap and then some cake, and then you can open presents. Yes?”

 

“No. A pesents,” she argued and Severus brows pulled down in confusion before he smiled down at her.

 

“Now, Miri, I am very proud of you for using your magic, and pushing what you want into my head is a clever new trick,” he said and she giggled at him.

 

“Dada see what want!”

 

“Someone’s getting more and more like her aunt every single day,” Bill laughed.

 

“Unfair,” Solarin replied.

 

“Totally fair.”

 

“Wait, wait, wait,” Harry said, a breath away from laughing. “She literally tried to change your mind, literally pushing what she wants into your head?”

 

“Yes, and the boxes are very pretty,” Severus agreed.

 

Miri, despite her new trick, wasn’t allowed to open her presents until after her nap. First came lunch, a whole banquet of cooked meats and barbecued vegetables. Food soon distracted Miri from being denied.

 

“Slow down, beautiful,” Ginny chuckled as Miri tried to shove more into her bulging cheeks. “Slowly, it’s not going anywhere.”

 

“Nummy!” She swallowed her mouthful and looked down, pouting as she noticed her plate was clean. “Caya, kickin’ poh-ease.”

 

Harry held out the plate of chicken. “Which one do you want, baby?”

 

She wiggled in place before she picked out a small drumstick and added it to her plate.

 

“Tank ‘oo. Dada? A has ‘amato?”

 

Severus was quick to lay a few tomato slices on her plate before he returned to his own food.

 

Soon enough, Miri was sleepily rubbing at her eyes and crawled across the blanket to climb into Harry’s lap. She cuddled in and used her magic to pull a book across the grass from where it was laying by the door. Harry read her the story and she fell asleep in his arms, sucking at her thumb and gripping at him.

 

While Miri and the twins napped in their mothers arms, the family lounged around, talking and laughing with each other.

 

Once Miri woke up, she hadn’t forgotten Severus’ promises. The cake was brought out.

 

Five tiers of chocolate goodness covered in pink fondant with adorable butterflies and flowers, topped off with a sugar paste model of Miri wearing a crown.

 

“You’ve outdone yourself,” Arthur praised as he accepted a second slice.

 

“Nummy cake!” Miri declared.

 

The little witch had chocolate and pink fondant smeared all over her face, her green eyes bright in the sea of confectionary. Her hands were covered in it, and she was happily picking up handfuls of cake and smooshing it between her fingers before she stuck it in her mouth.

 

Once the cake was demolished, Miri was surrounded by a circle of presents. She amused herself by turning around and around, clapping and shrieking at all the pretty wrapped boxes around her.

 

“Okay, baby,” Harry said. “Which one do you want to open first?”

 

“All pesents!”

 

“Yes, you can open all of them. Which one first?”

 

Eventually, Miri got to opening her gifts instead of just giggling at them. She, like every toddler that had ever gone before her, loved the paper and ribbons and bows she got to tear off, and the boxes themselves. Sooner or later she would get to the actual gifts.

 

Miri received a play kitchen, with plastic food and cooking equipment. A dollshouse was next, followed by a playhouse for the garden. Next up came a little pedal car, a toddler-sized climbing frame, a few dolls and stuffed animals.

 

On the more magical side, she was given a toy broom that only went a little higher than the grass, a teddy bear that hugged back, a toy wand that blew bubbles in different colours, and a kitten.

 

The kitten was the big gift from Harry and Severus. They thought it was the perfect time for her first familiar. The little male cat was black with one white paw, the front right one. Romulus was quick to guide him in where to do his business and where the food and water was.

 

Miri’s first act as a cat owner was to introduce him to Smoo. The kitten happily sniffed at the humming ball of fluff, going so far as to lick him before he shuddered at the sensation of Smoo’s fur.

 

“What do you think, Miri?” Harry asked, picking the kitten up. “His mummy was half-Kneazle, so he’s very smart and will make a good familiar for my little witch.”

 

“Clevah kitty,” she said, carefully petting his head and laughing when his rough tongue swiped across her fingers. “Kitty mine.”

 

“Yes, he’s yours,” Severus said, feeding the cat a piece of cooked chicken and getting a meow of thanks. “Now, kitty needs a name. What name do you think he might like?”

 

“Don’t know,” she said, shrugging and petting. “Kitty not tell me yet.”

 

“Okay,” Sirius said.

 

Miri spent the rest of the day carrying her kitten around with her, pretending to cook it food and happily petting it. Remus taught her how to dangle string for him, and she found it hilarious when the cat went nuts over the dangling end.

 

Dinner was more barbecue as they had seriously over-shopped for the day, and then more cake.

 

The kitten happily perched on the sink edge while Miri had her bath, and then curled up in the rocking chair as she was read a story and drifted off to sleep.

 

Severus and Harry had had ideas of how to celebrate Miri’s first birthday in their own more private way. But by the time bedtime rolled around, neither of them had the energy to do anything but cuddle into each other.

 

“A year,” Severus murmured as Harry settled on his chest.

 

“Yes.”

 

“I still can’t quite get my head around it. So much has happened since she was born.”

 

“I know. It’s been a pretty good year, all things considered,” Harry said.

 

“Do you truly feel that? Harry, are you happy with our lives?”

 

Harry looked up at him with a look somewhere between incredulous and amused.

 

“Let’s take stock,” Harry said with a smile. “I have a husband who loves me, a daughter I adore, a family, a safe home, I’m getting good marks in all my classes, and I went on my very first holiday. Not to mention that I made it to my seventeenth birthday when I shouldn’t have even made it to my second. Severus, I have all these people around me who love me and care what happens to me. I might not think that highly of myself most of the time but I do value what they bring to my life.”

 

“And my life?”

 

“You have a husband who loves you, a daughter who thinks you hung the moon, a successful business.”

 

Severus smiled and pulled him in for a kiss, holding him close, drawing patterns on the skin of his back.

 

“I am very glad of one thing though,” Harry said as he pulled back.

 

“And that one thing is?”

 

“It’s this night and not a year ago. That was damn painful on my privates.”

 

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Harry lifted Miri onto his lap and helped her hold up the book.

 

“Okay, baby, what’s that one?” he prompted, pointing at the letter on the page.

 

“Is a B,” she said.

 

“Good girl, that’s my clever girl. And what begins with a B?”

 

“Bzzzz,” she hummed, pointing at the bee on the page. “A bee say buzz.”

 

“Well done.” He leafed through the pages. He didn’t want her to recite it by memory, he wanted to know she actually knew what she was reading.

 

They’d started to notice that Miri was very interested in letters. She played with the alphabet magnets on the fridge and was quick to point out that the apples on the table started with an A, the spaghetti started with an S, banana with a B. She was very good at following along when she was read a story. She’d point with her little finger at the words being read.

 

“How about this one? What’s this one?”

 

“Is a G. Guh.”

 

“Good sounds! That’s my smart girl. What starts with a G?”

 

“Gowiya.”

 

“A gorilla, very good. What else begins with a G?”

 

“Goose. Gape. Gampa!”

 

“Very good. Goose, grape and grandpa.” Harry set aside the book and led her over to the low table covered in crayons and paper. “Shall we draw some letters? Yeah?”

 

“A daw a lettahs!” She grabbed a blue crayon.

 

Harry smiled to himself as he watched her carefully fill a piece of paper with letters. He loved the way she spoke. It was so haphazard. Sometimes she could pronounce things just fine, other times she’d miss out a letter or a whole word. It was adorable. She got so excited her mouth just couldn’t keep up.

 

Molly had suggested that maybe Miri was ready to start learning to read. Severus agreed, saying that Solarin had been early in her education. Miri would always be advanced, it was a part of what she was. And they weren’t going to push her. If she wanted to learn, so be it. If she didn’t, they’d leave her be.

 

“Caya, look me picture.”

 

Harry took the piece of paper and smiled at her.

 

“Very good. Can you tell me what all of them are?”

 

She proceeded to flop down into his lap and point at her carefully drawn letters, reciting what each one was as she went.

 

“Hard to believe it’s only been a few days since her birthday,” Nixie said as she joined them. Miri grinned up at her and waved. “She’s so little, and she’s learning to read. Barely seems real. Seems like she was this tiny newborn just last week.”

 

“I know. It takes some getting your head around. Hey, Miri, do you want to do a picture for Aunt Nixie?”

 

“Ant Nissy picture!” she declared, a tiny little battle cry as she returned to her own seat and grabbed a fresh piece of paper.

 

While Miri was busy with her masterpiece, Harry and his sister settled on the sofa.

 

“So, how are you doing?” Harry prompted.

 

“I’m okay. I mean, I’m not _okay_ okay. Things aren’t all sunshine and roses. But things are pretty good,” she said.

 

“I know what you mean. I keep waiting for him to do something.”

 

“I think he’s done enough for the time being.” Harry took a deep breath to calm himself. “Nixie, who taught you to read?”

 

“My nanny. She was nice, from what I remember. Who taught you?”

 

“No one. I sort of picked it up at school, but no one ever sat down with me and taught me.”

 

“That sucks. Well. At least Miri won’t have that issue.” She watched the little girl drawing. “I don’t understand your relatives. You were a baby. How could they treat you like that?”

 

“I don’t know. Whatever it was that got to them about me, I don’t know what it is. Wish I did sometimes. But it doesn’t matter anymore. I’m here now, who cares what’s wrong with them?”

 

“True. Harry? Will you go over the Defence chapter with me? It’s still not sinking in.”

 

“Of course I will. What are brothers for?”

 

She cuddled into him and then smiled.

 

“Maybe that’s why we all found each other,” she said.

 

“Huh?”

 

“Maybe it’s because we were all scorned in one way or another. You and me both had bad childhoods, so did Sirius, Remus was an outcast. It’s almost like fate or magic or something wanted us all together, like it knew the best place for us all was here, together.”

 

Harry hummed in agreement, stroking her hair. He was so thankful for his family, so grateful to have them all. Their family was loud and crazy and someone was always around, but it was warm and safe and there was so much love. Harry knew he’d never have to worry about being alone or unwanted. No matter his opinion of himself, he would never question theirs. They loved him, all of him, just the way he was. And that had more value to him than anything else.

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Oliver rolled over and snuggled into George, pressing his lips to his warm chest.

 

“We should really get up,” George said, toying with his hair.

 

“So?”

 

“So…it’s a thing where we both get out of this bed and put on clothes and do things outside of this room,” George prompted and Oliver moaned, burying himself under the blankets.

 

“But I don’t want to,” he whined. “It’s my day off.”

 

George tugged at the sheets, trying to find his boyfriend but having a hard time being serious through his laughter. His laughs turned into moans as Oliver pressed a kiss to his hip, clever fingers tickling over his soft length.

 

“Olly, please.”

 

“You want me to stop?” he asked between kisses.

 

“No. I should, but no. Oh, fuck…”

 

Oliver grinned to himself and set to working the cock he held. He stroked slowly, kissing George’s belly and thighs, dipping in every now and then to lick the head, which made the redhead gasp. Oliver ground his own erection into the mattress as he worked his lover into a frenzy.

 

So many times Oliver had pictured doing exactly this. When his fantasizing about George had started, he’d blamed it purely on hormones. When puberty had seemed to even out and Oliver was still dreaming of the sweeter of the twins, he realised he might have a problem.

 

Oliver had always found George to be the softer of the Weasley twins, always more ready to listen, gentler. He wondered how many people actually realised that George had one eye that was a slightly darker shade of blue. Or maybe it was just him, because he’d spent so long dreaming of him.

 

When he’d left Hogwarts, he’d been sure it would fade. And for a while, he had managed to satiate his hunger for men with random hook-ups and short relationships.

 

And then George had walked into a bar one night and Oliver refused to back down, refused to let the opportunity pass him by. Of course, he hadn’t planned for them to end up in bed that very night. Maybe lead up to it.

 

He wasn’t complaining.

 

“Olly, if you don’t get a fucking move on and fuck me, I’m shoving you out of this bed and handling matters myself!”

 

Oliver chuckled as he crawled up the long freckled body, pressing kisses as he went, nibbling at a hard nipple before he conjured some lube and coated George.

 

“Better?” he murmured, tugging George’s bottom lip with his teeth.

 

“Yes, oh, yes, better, much!” he babbled, thrusting up into the slick grip.

 

They were both clean, and they were monogamous, so neither of them had seen a need for condoms after a few months of sleeping together. The first time they had done it without a barrier of latex, both of them had almost passed out.

 

Oliver sank down and tangled George’s hair in his fists, slamming their mouths together. After the amount of times they’d done it the night before, he was still slick and open, ready to take it. He could hear himself whining high and desperate as he rose and fell, guiding the hard shaft within him to rub where he wanted.

 

“Oh, fuck me. Please. George. Please. Georgie!”

 

“I got you,” George promised, gripping his hips and thrusting up into the sheath gripping him. He ran his fingers down the line of his spine, pressing their chests together. “Keep going. Just…go!”

 

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.”

 

The headboard began to bang against the wall as they chased the pleasure, the mattress creaking beneath them, their cries echoing against the walls.

 

They left bruises on each other as they tried to find something stable to hold onto as every part of their bodies strained towards completion. Lips trailed across whatever skin they came across, teeth nipping, and eventually they managed to find each other’s mouths and thrust tongues deep.

 

“Almost…close…please,” Oliver begged, looping his arms around George’s shoulders, burying his face in his neck as he pleaded.

 

George took him and rolled him onto his back before grabbing his hands and pinning them above his head. He readjusted Oliver’s hips and thrust hard and fast, thighs wide around his hips as he hammered into him until he tumbled over the edge, spurting hot and sticky between them.

 

The feel of his hot cum hitting his chest tipped George over, and he felt his breath seep out of him in one long moan as he came within the tight passage, collapsing atop the pliant body.

 

Oliver tiredly stroked the wild red hair, too spent to do anything more but unwilling to stop touching.

 

“Olly?”

 

“Hmmm?”

 

“Am I ever going to get tired of this?”

 

“This?”

 

“This moment,” George continued. “When we’ve both cum and we’re just lying here, just together, all tired and boneless.”

 

“So this is your favourite part, huh?” he asked with a smile. “I would have thought it was when you came.”

 

“Well, that part is pretty great too. But this is the best.”

 

“It is very nice.”

 

“So? Am I?”

 

“Georgie, baby, I’m running on very little brain right now. The blood is still all south.”

 

“Oh. Right. Am I ever going to get tired of this moment?”

 

Oliver smiled to himself and stroked his sweaty back.

 

“I really hope not.”

 

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Miri, as it turned out, was a perfect cat owner.

 

She happily filled the kitten’s bowls of food and water (with a little help from someone a bit taller), sat and brushed his black fur until it gleamed, played with him until his little furry body was pooped. She’d quickly taught him to ride in her little toy pram and to sit with her while she pointed out letters in picture books.

 

The only thing she didn’t do was the litter box, because the cat didn’t use one. Thanks to Romulus and Crookshanks, the kitten did his business outside.

 

The two pets and the various owls of the house guided the kitten, and through them he learnt what was and wasn’t okay. They taught him not to bite his humans, and not to scratch them. Crookshaks taught him what his cat-tree was for, and that he wasn’t allowed to eat off the plates the humans put on the table.

 

Miri picked up her kitten and carried him across the playroom, carrying him just the way her parents had told her to, careful not to dangle his back end. She put him down in the pile of stuffed toys for Catherine and Joseph.

 

The twins liked to watch him pounce around on the toys, closely watched by Crookshanks. Their mothers cat was their favourite. The great beast was always happy to lay there and let them pet him, and occasionally play pillow for them.

 

“Are they okay with the cats?” Harry asked Severus as they watched them.

 

“Crookshanks is friendly with little ones, and the kitten has shown no signs of aggression. The pet shop owner said he would learn very fast. I don’t think we should worry,” Severus assured. “What you should worry about are these exam questions. Come on. Four uses for fluxweed, please.”

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Solarin hunched up on the closed toilet lid and smiled at Daven as she was lowered into the bath, her little legs kicking at the feel of the warm water.

 

“Thanks for doing this,” Solarin said and Hermione smiled. “I don’t think I could handle bending over that tub right now.”

 

“I can’t believe you’re still on,” Hermione said incredulously as she wet the baby’s hair.

 

“Three weeks and two days and still going.”

 

“Should we be worried that you’re going to dry out like a raisin?”

 

“Sam doesn’t think so. He thinks that it was a long one anyway, and then I got drowned in that blooming potion. My body is just trying to flush it all out.”

 

They were quiet for a while as the baby was bathed, and then, as Hermione placed her into the towel Solarin held, the younger witch spoke.

 

“Sol, can I ask you something?”

 

“Of course.”

 

“Do you ever miss your mother? I mean, I know what she did to you and what she let your father do and everything, and all that is awful. But she’s still your mum.”

 

“Yeah, she is. And, since you’re asking, no, I don’t. I don’t remember her, so it’s hard to miss her. But I’d probably feel different if my situation was closer to yours. You must miss your parents.”

 

“I do,” she said sadly, drying Daven’s toes. “I keep wanting to show mum and dad all the things the twins do. I know they have Molly, but I want them to have their Nana Cathy. And Arthur is great, he really is, but my dad would have been an amazing Grandpa.”

 

“I’m sure they would have been great. They raised you, and the Weasley boys don’t tend to make stupid choices. Well, I think Percy might be an exception there, but there’s always one, isn’t there?”

 

“It’s one of my recurring nightmares that JoJo becomes that one,” she giggled. “Molly managed to have six normal ones and Percy.”

 

“Who knows, maybe we’ve dodged that bullet and he’s taking all the stupid for the next ten generations,” Solarin said and they had a happy catty giggle about it.

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Remus stared into the pleading blue eyes and sighed. He really didn’t want to do it, but he had to be honest with himself.

 

He found it hard to ever say no to Sirius.

 

“Sirius, sweetheart, please. Do I really have to do this?”

 

Sirius looked crestfallen. “No, not if you don’t want to,” he said. “Honey, if you really can’t do this, then I’d understand.”

 

Remus groaned and crashed their mouths together. Sirius submitted under hit touch and reciprocated, letting Remus have his tongue when he chased it.

 

“Alright, here is my bargain, take it or leave it,” Remus said, stroking his cheek. “I will not negotiate, I will not change any detail.”

 

“Okay…”

 

“I will do this,” Remus said and Sirius grinned, practically bouncing. “I will do this, and only this. I will not even entertain the idea of more than this. I will be civil. I will attempt to be polite.”

 

“I’m not asking anything more right now. I just want you to do this, just try this. Please?” Sirius begged, stroking his shirt-covered chest.

 

He took a deep breath, took one more kiss, before he pushed Sirius away and walked into the coffee shop.

 

‘Okay, Remus, nice public Muggle space,’ he thought to himself as he approached the counter. ‘One drink, that’s it, just one. You can do this. You CAN do this! Gryffindor strength! Oh, fuck.’

 

He ordered a hot chocolate and a brownie and made his way to the table where Canis Black was waiting for him.

 

“Lord Black.”

 

“Please, call me Canis,” the older man insisted. “Or Mr Black if you prefer. Please, let me help.”

 

“No, thank you,” he said as Canis reached for the plate. “I’m fine. I’ll just…”

 

Canis looked highly uncomfortable and Remus took a small pleasure in it. Well. Maybe more than small.

 

“So…”

 

Remus raised an eyebrow as he sipped his drink and held in a grimace. Ugh! Too many chemicals!

 

“I want to start by saying thank you,” Canis said, toying with his croissant, tearing it into little pieces. “Thank you for coming today. You didn’t have to, and Merlin knows I don’t deserve anything from you. So…thank you.”

 

“Yes, well, Sirius is very…persuasive when he wants something,” Remus admitted. “And it is just a drink.”

 

“Yes, he always has been, even when he was a little boy. Always so much more charismatic than we were ever expecting. Much more than Regulus.”

 

“Shame you couldn’t tell him that,” Remus snapped and then groaned. “I’m sorry, that was uncalled for.”

 

“No, it wasn’t,” he whispered, shamefaced. “Look, Remus. I’m not here to hurt him. Or to try and be forgiven. I know what I did to my son. To both my sons. One dead and the other ashamed of me. I deserve everything you want to dish out.”

 

“Saying that doesn’t make me want to do this any more.”

 

“No, I didn’t think it would.”

 

“So what is it you want? If it’s not forgiveness, and it’s not to hurt him, then what is it?”

 

“Being perfectly honest, I’m not sure. Curiosity, perhaps. Wondering what can be undone. Seeing the man he’s become, who he is now. Hearing him talk about his life, how happy and content he is, it brings me a lot of happiness. He’s very proud of your children. And he says you have a granddaughter. You must be very happy.”

 

“We are. She’s a beautiful little witch.” He chuckled to himself. “The family tree is rather entangled. Through Harry’s marriage we gain another two grandkids. Children of Severus’ sister. You met her, when she was a little girl.”

 

“I did?”

 

“Yes. The day Severus was Marked.”

 

“Ah. That little girl. Yes. Fiery little thing.”

 

“She’s still fiery. And little. Sometimes I feel sure Shakespeare must have met her in a past life.”

 

“Which quote?”

 

“ ‘And though she be but little, she is fierce!’ Always makes me think of her.” He chuckled a little to himself. “Actually, it applies to most of the females in the family.”

 

“Good. I’d hate to think of anyone like my wife in your family.”

 

“What was she like?”

 

“A pain in the arse,” he said bluntly and then smiled at the startled laugh he got.

 

“No, I don’t think we have any of those. We did have Narcissa, but…well, she’s passed now.”

 

“Yes, I did read the paper about that. Terrible business. I can’t understand where Lucius ever got the idea to do what he’s done. I know the Death Eaters did terrible things, but never like this.”

 

“He’ll be caught soon enough,” Remus said, clear in his tone that he’d rather not continue down that line of conversation.

 

The man had been a Death Eater and Canis couldn’t see where he got the idea? Remus knew with absolute certainty that the topic would lead to nothing but screaming on his part.

 

“Yes, I’m sure.” He took a sip of his tea and was much less successful at hiding his dislike of it. “What are your children like?”

 

“Strong,” Remus said eventually. “Harry is a Gryffindor, technically, but he could have gone to Slytherin easily. Nixie…she’s my angel. A Slytherin, but she’s sweet inside. They both love Quidditch, and chocolate. And making fun of Sirius. Harry is definitely closer to Siri, and Nixie to me, but they’re both wonderful.”

 

“They sound it. I’d love to meet them someday,” Canis said carefully. “Someday, perhaps. I know it’s something I’d have to earn. But I would like to.”

 

“I’ll…keep that in mind,” Remus said diplomatically.

 

He didn’t want to say no outright, not give a knee-jerk reaction. Those were never fair. Nor did he want to say yes. He did not want the man near his children. He didn’t want him around Sirius, but he could do nothing about that. Sirius was a grown man, and Canis was, at least by blood, his father. Remus had pretty much no say in what Sirius chose to do.

 

Remus was his lover, his friend, his partner in all things, his mate. He was not Sirius’ jailer.

 

Even if he did want to chain him to the bed and never let him leave.

 

“Tell me…what…what was Sirius like? When he was a little boy? Before I met him? He rarely talks about his life before Hogwarts, and I confess I haven’t really asked. But I am curious.”

 

Canis hummed as he thought back. “He was…stubborn is the best word for it. Always knew what he wanted, and once he’d made up his mind it was always damn near impossible to change. He always knew exactly who he was.”

 

“Yes, he always has been very clear on himself,” Remus agreed.

 

“And you. He was always very fierce when it came to you.”

 

“Now that I did know. I also know that you came to our wedding in disguise.”

 

“How on earth do you know that!”

 

“Solarin. You were thinking of it the day Severus was Marked and she read it off of you. She told me a few months ago.”

 

“Dear Merlin, how do you keep a secret around her?”

 

“You don’t,” Remus admitted. “She keeps them. Whatever she hears, she’s always discreet.”

 

“That’s…unsettling.”

 

“She takes some getting used to, but she’s a good woman. And I’m very glad she is on our side.”

 

“I’ll bet. Yes, I did come to your wedding. He’s my son, I wanted to see it. It was a beautiful day. You both looked so very happy. I was very sad to hear of Sirius being sent away. It must have been very hard for you.”

 

“Could you have done something? Could you have kept him out of Azkaban? Kept him with me?” Remus asked softly.

 

“No. I did try. He was never one of them, any fool could have seen that if they cared to look. Betray James and Lily? Betray you? Kill Peter? Even Belladonna knew it wasn’t the truth, bugger if she’d admit it. I’ll admit, I’ve always wondered how she was ever his son.”

 

“Sirius has mentioned how cold she was.”

 

“I believe the term Frosty the Snow Bitch applies.”

 

“And with Regulus?”

 

“She was always affectionate with him, as far as her affections went. But Sirius…she never took to him. When he was a baby, I thought it would change as he grew. But it never did.”

 

“Why?”

 

“I’m not entirely sure, she never did have that conversation with me,” Canis said. “I believe it was something to do with the way he was born.”

 

“The way he was born?”

 

“I can say it now, because she’s dead and no one cares these days, but Sirius was born on the 13th of June. We were married on the 16th of January.”

 

“Dear lord,” Remus giggled. “Are you saying…no, surely not.”

 

“Yes, he was. And when he was actually born…he was a big boy, and she was a very small woman. He was pretty ill too. He had trouble breathing to start, couldn’t quite get the hang of it, and feeding him was almost impossible. His poor nurse, I don’t think that woman slept for the first year of his life. I thought it was just that she was nervous about hurting him. He seemed to fragile, so breakable. But even as he grew, Belladonna always pushed him away.”

 

Remus stirred at his drink, thinking it over.

 

Sirius had always been insecure, as long as Remus had known him. Sure, he’d been good at putting on a good front, at making people see what they wanted to see. Azkaban had been one of the few things Sirius hadn’t been able to talk his way out of.

 

Remus had always known that Sirius needed to be sure of his love, be absolute in his belief in him. And Remus had never doubted him except for Azkaban, and even then it hadn’t stopped Remus loving him.

 

Sirius was his mate, his lover, his everything. He knew every inch of Sirius, and now many of the things he’d known were suddenly making a lot of sense.

 

Sirius knew what he liked to eat and tended to stick to it. He had too much spice, too much dairy or too much wine and his digestive system staged a revolt. Remus had thought it was because of Azkaban, or maybe the inbreeding in the Pureblood lines.

 

And now he knew.

 

“Remus…can I ask…I know I have no right to ask…but…”

 

“Yes?”

 

“How is he? He says he’s happy and content, and he seems it. But I worry about him. I’ve had one son die because I didn’t see what was right in front of me. I don’t want to miss something important because I was so busy not seeing.”

 

“He’s not yours to protect,” Remus snapped. “You washed your hands of him decades ago. You’re right, you have no right to ask.”

 

“He is still my son,” he said carefully.

 

“Really? And was he your son the day you beat him to a pulp? Or the day you tried to force him to marry someone he didn’t love? What about all the times you made him feel he wasn’t good enough? You have not been a part of his life for a very long time, Mr Black. Do not insult me by trying to play the dutiful father.”

 

“I have made mistakes, I do not deny that…”

 

“Mistakes! Emotional abuse, physical abuse and borderline neglect. You threw out his toys when he was seven. Seven! How could you expect him to be an adult at seven? Dark Marks, Unforgiveables, arranged marriages. And when he opposed you, you beat him. Give me one good reason I should continue sitting here.”

 

Canis stared at him for a moment.

 

“He wants it,” Canis said eventually.

 

“It’s not enough,” Remus said bluntly. “He wants to eat his weight in apple crumble. It does not mean I will let him. This conversation is at an end.” He stood up, straightening his clothes. “I won’t stop Sirius from continuing on with contact, but I will never do this again, and I will NEVER let you near my children. Have I left anything unclear?”

 

“Shouldn’t it be Sirius’ decision who is allowed near his children?”

 

Remus leaned over him, balancing on the arms of Canis’ chair. “You come near my children and I will put you in the ground,” he snarled.

 

Hands grasped his shoulders and pulled him back.

 

“Remus, honey, stop,” Sirius said, holding him close, pushing his face into his neck so he could inhale lungful’s of Sirius’ scent. “Calm down, it’s okay. Just calm down. What did you do?”

 

“Me?” Canis exclaimed. “I did nothing!”

 

“Remus? Come on, honey. Tell me what happened.”

 

“This isn’t about you,” Remus said. “It’s about him, him trying to make himself feel better! He thinks he can just walk back in and claim a place in your life!”

 

“But…that’s not…I didn’t…” Sirius stammered, looking between his husband and his father. “Is that right? Is that what you think will happen here?”

 

“Isn’t it?” Canis asked.

 

“No!”

 

“But you contacted me! You wanted to see me!”

 

“I wanted some closure, some understanding of what made you hate me so much,” Sirius said. “I was curious about you, that’s all. I never implied that you could be a part of my life.”

 

“Then this was a waste of my time,” Canis said, standing and gathering his things. “Good day to you both.”

 

Sirius stood there, stunned. He’d walked out, he’d just walked out. He couldn’t get his own way so he’d dismissed Sirius once again. No argument, no name calling, nothing. Just upped and left.

 

Remus, who had managed to calm down, took Sirius’ hand and led him out of the coffee shop and down the street, into an alley and out of sight before he Apparated them both to Diagon Alley. He took Sirius to a café and ordered them hot chocolates.

 

“I’m a fool,” Sirius murmured eventually. “I should have realised. I pushed and pushed so you’d have to go meet him, fuck, I’m so stupid!”

 

“No. Siri, look at me,” he said, coaxing him with a gentle hand in his hair. “You did nothing wrong. You had questions, there is nothing shameful about wanting answers.”

 

“I brought that bastard into your life. You, my amazing husband who I love more than anything. And I was considering letting him near our children, how stupid is that!”

 

“No! You’re not stupid! You made a mistake and that’s okay,” he promised, kissing him. “It’s okay to make mistakes. It’s okay.”

 

“Saving me from myself again,” Sirius joked. “Damn. I’m high maintenance.”

 

“You always have been, and I’ve never loved you any the less.”

 

“Don’t you get tired of it?”

 

Remus heard what Sirius was actually asking. Don’t you get tired of me.

 

“Sirius Orion Lupin-Black, listen to me very carefully. I love you, wholly and completely without reservation. I love you when you’re sleeping, when you’re eating, when you’re being an utter prat. You hog the covers, and the hot water. You’re the first to disappear when the washing up comes your way, and you make some truly shocking decisions. When I say I love you, it's not because I want you, or because I can't help myself - it has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try... I've seen your kindness, and your strength, I've seen the best and the worst of you and I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You're a hell of a man.”

 

Sirius was crying and Remus didn’t stop him. Just cuddled him in and let him go.

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Harry trapped his tongue between his teeth as he concentrated on making his folds completely even and straight.

 

Sheet after sheet of paper was folded under his careful hands, and then he gathered them into groups of four, one inside another inside another. He repeated the process until he had ten groups. The instructions called the signatures.

 

He measured and marked and then pierced his marks with an awl. He threaded his needle and began to bind them together.

 

It had been Oliver who had taught him to book bind. Apparently, Oliver’s mother worked for Flourish and Blots making books, and he’d grown up doing it. Harry had been enchanted by the notebook Oliver had been scribbling down notes in one day, and Oliver had been quick to tell him he had made it himself.

 

Harry had only had to look excited before Oliver offered to teach him.

 

Through the hole, round the previous stitch, back in. Over to the next hole, repeat the steps. On and on Harry went until he had sewn all ten signatures together. Then he clamped them in the press Oliver had loaned him. Two bamboo cutting boards held together by screws and wing nuts that could be loosened and tightened. Once he had it how he wanted it, he applied a layer of glue to the spine, and a second layer once it dried, and then added a ribbon of his choice, which was red, and left it to dry.

 

While he was waiting for things to dry, he slowly made his way through his revision for Herbology. It wasn’t his favourite subject, but it wasn’t History of Magic. Even Severus had said that subject was a waste of time with the way Binn’s taught it. But Harry had been finding much more enjoyment in History with Remus teaching him. The werewolf knew so many little titbits that weren’t in the books, silly facts that helped the knowledge stick in his brain a lot easier.

 

Once his glue was all dry, Harry added his end pages, a nice bright red, and put it back in the press to dry while he switched to working on Transfiguration. And then once that was dry, he added a piece of paper to the spine to make sure his end pages wouldn’t fall off before carefully trimming the edge of the pages with a craft knife.

 

He felt all proud of himself when he’d finished his very first text block.

 

He set aside his revision for the more enjoyable activity of making the hard cover for his book. His hand nudged the newspaper as he put down his ink bottle.

 

He measured his text block and then measured out his boards. Back cover, front cover, spine. He carefully cut them out and glued them to the fabric Oliver had prepared for him. It was electric pink with little dragons on it.

 

To prepare the fabric, Oliver had first ironed the fabric flat, and then used heat bond interfacing to ‘glue’ tissue paper to it. It was that simple.

 

He piled a load of text books on the pieces so they would dry flat.

 

“Are you ever coming out?” Severus asked from the doorway. “I brought you some lunch.”

 

“Thanks. I’m revising.”

 

“I see that. You’re also hiding.”

 

“I’m not!” Harry protested, accepting the sandwich. “What is there that I’m hiding from?”

 

“This,” he said, picking up the newspaper and the letter from Dumbledore. “They’re not going to take her from us, Harry. This is simply procedure.”

 

“Insinuating that I would ever put her at risk…I don’t understand,” Harry said. “Why are they doing this to us?”

 

Severus sighed. Apparently a complaint had been made to the Ministry that Harry was unfit as a parent, and the suggestion put forward that perhaps having Miri removed from their custody was the best course of action. Dumbledore was working from within the Ministry to try and make them see that it was simply malicious gossip, that Miri was perfectly well cared for.

 

They still wanted to do a home visit and investigate the claims.

 

To make matters worse, the press had gotten wind of it and splashed it across the front page of the Prophet. Rita Skeeter was out to get Harry, they were all sure of it now.

 

“They won’t take her, they wouldn’t dare,” Severus assured. “You’re Harry Potter, you saved them. If it truly comes to it, we’ll invoke the love of your fans. The Ministry truly isn’t big enough to take your child from you. If they tried, they would lose the support of the people and there would be anarchy in the streets.”

 

“The things they imply…”

 

“I know,” he said sadly. “It upsets me too.”

 

According to the Prophet, the complaint was that Harry was neglectful, that Miri was underfed and left to herself for hours at a time without supervision, that she was being forced to do magic beyond her age and ability. There were claims that she wasn’t loved, wasn’t wanted, and claims that Harry was mentally unstable.

 

Claims against Severus were centred on his history, that he’d been a Death Eater. Apparently the person who had made the complaint was under the impression that Severus had acted of his own free will and not as a spy. The things hinted at were enough to turn all their stomachs. That someone would do such things to a child, that anyone would even suggest them…it was vile.

 

Harry finished his lunch and then poked at the letter and paper unhappily.

 

“So what are we supposed to do about this?”

 

“For the moment, nothing is required of us,” Severus said, taking his hands and rubbing them with his thumbs, easing the muscles. “Most likely, the Ministry will want one of their Auror’s to do a home visit, to assuage their concerns. Possibly a Healer will be asked to examine Miri, to dismiss those particular rumours. But those things will only happen if the Ministry need to be seen to be doing something.”

 

“I don’t like this. I don’t want it to be like this!”

 

“I know, I know. Come on, love,” he soothed, mulling him onto his lap and kissing him to calm him.

 

“She’s mine!”

 

“Yes, she is, and no one will take her, I won’t let them.”

 

“How dare they imply that anyone would hurt her! Oh! You know what, it’s probably those fuckers on holiday! The ones I wouldn’t sign autographs for. Or the gossiping bitches by the pool, you remember? The ones who bitched about the floaties?”

 

“Possibly. Or, it is Lucius. The complaint is anonymous, so it could be anyone.”

 

“Shit. If they take her and put her in Care, Lucius can get at her, use her to draw me out!”

 

“Stop, Harry, stop,” he said firmly, cupping Harry’s cheeks and forcing their eyes to meet. “Listen to me. No one will take her, I will never let them. We will get through this.”

 

Harry snuggled into his neck, clinging tight and Severus clung just as hard.

 

“Severus, Harry.”

 

Remus was standing in the doorway.

 

“Albus is here, he’s seen the Minister.”

 

Harry and Severus followed him down.

 

“It is all settled, you need not worry,” Albus promised as they entered. “The complaint was made by an anonymous source and isn’t being treated seriously. Cornelius is furious that Skeeter published it and he’s had her hauled in for questioning.”

 

“Does everyone who reads the Prophet know that?” Sirius pressed.

 

“They will,” Albus assured. “A retraction and an apology are being drafted as we speak and will be in both the Evening Prophet and tomorrows Morning Prophet. The Editor in Chief would also like me to extend his deepest apologies.”

 

“Screw his apologies!” Harry snarled. “After what he allowed printed, he should be having his parenting skills questioned! He should have the threat of this hang over him for a day, see how he likes it!”

 

“Easy, pup,” Remus said.

 

“No! Fuck easy! They believed some idiot with too much time on their hands! The next person to threaten my family in any way just because I’m Harry fucking Potter is going to know they fucked up!”

 

“Uncle Hawy? Why awe you mad?” Dorian asked and Harry stared at him for a moment before he deflated.

 

“I’m sorry, Dor. I shouldn’t have yelled like that.”

 

Dorian was quick to hug him and press a kiss to his cheek.

 

“Is okay. You wewe mad. Why wewe you mad?”

 

“I’m mad because someone said some very nasty things about me and Severus, said that we don’t take care of Miri.”

 

“That’s silly,” the little boy said simply. “Was it someone in the house?”

 

“No.”

 

“Then they’s wong. They don’t know, they don’t live hewe, so they silly.”

 

Harry let out a startled laugh and picked him up, hugging him close.

 

“You’re right. You are a very clever little boy, do you know that?”

 

“You smart too.”

 

“Not as smart as you. Don’t ever let anyone tell you different, okay?”

 

“Okay. Put me down, please,” Dorian asked politely. “I go play in the gawden.”

 

Harry set him on his feet and he scampered off, hugging Severus’ legs on his way outside. Harry suddenly felt exhausted and sank down into a chair, burying his face in his hands.

 

“I can’t do this,” he mumbled and Severus gathered him onto his lap, cuddling him close. “Severus, I can’t. It’s too hard.”

 

“I know, Harry. I know that life keeps kicking you, but it will get better. Listen to me, love. You’re not on your own.”

 

“Why do they have to make it so hard?” he whimpered.

 

“Because they are bored fools that have nothing better to do with their time,” Sirius said bluntly. “Sorry. Is this a private moment?”

 

“No,” Severus said. “This is a ‘the world sucks and humans are morons’ moment.”

 

“Ah. Well. I can’t argue with that one.”

 

Harry gasped.

 

“Miri’s awake from her nap,” he said, pressing a kiss to Severus’ lips as he stood up. “I’ll fall apart later, when she’s in bed. I’m going to get her and take her out to the garden to play.”

 

“Harry? What do you want to do about all this?” Remus asked, motioning at the letter and newspaper.

 

“I’m not doing anything about that, not right now. Right now, I’m going to play in the garden with my baby,” Harry said, heading to the door. “Professor, you seem to have it all in hand. You and Severus can handle it.”

 

“Very well,” Dumbledore said carefully after getting a quick head shake from Severus. “Have fun with Miri, my boy.”

 

Harry left the room and started climbing the stairs, letting himself leave the pain and anger in the kitchen. Dorian was right. Whoever had made the complaint knew nothing about him, his family, his life, or his parenting skills.

 

And, all things considered, no matter how much Harry disliked himself, he knew he was a pretty good parent. Miri was happy and healthy, she spent almost all of her day smiling. She was independent (as much as a 12 month old could be), and opinionated, and stubborn. She was affectionate and sweet and had the cutest giggle Harry had ever come across. She was perfect, and Harry took it as proof that he must be doing something right.

 

Miri was standing in her cot when he entered her bedroom, her kitten standing on the floor looking up at her as she rubbed at her eyes.

 

As she saw Harry, her face lit up with a huge smile and she jumped up and down.

 

“Caya! Me go up!”

 

“Yes, Miri goes up!” he sang as he picked her up, cuddling her and rubbing his nose against hers. “Did you have a nice nap?”

 

She nodded, pressing kisses to his cheek.

 

“Did you have nice dreams?”

 

Another nod. She was happily exploring his ear, tracing her tiny fingertip around the swirls and curves.

 

“Pity dream,” she said, tugging at the lobe as he carried her towards the stairs.

 

“Oh. That’s good. Pretty dreams are nice. What colours were there?” he prompted as he paused on the top step to scoop up her kitten. He promptly settled on Harry’s shoulder for Miri to pet.

 

“Was a blue and a red and a lellow,” she said. “I sawed a pink and a geen ands puple. And sparky!”

 

“Sparkly? Wow. What else was in your dream?”

 

“Kitty! And daddy, and Caya and Ampa!”

 

“Which grandpa?”

 

“Bowf. Was playin’ game in garden,” she said, carefully petting the kitten on his head between his ears. He was a good sport, taking it even when she slipped and wasn’t so gentle.

 

“Really! What game were they playing?”

 

“A playin’ on da side and a swing and a tree.”

 

“Oh. What were they doing in the tree?”

 

“A kissin’!”

 

“Oh, Grandpa Sirius and Grandpa Remus were kissing in the tree. Did they like it in the tree?”

 

“Found birdies in a tree! Flap flap flap! Pity birdies.”

 

“What colours were the birdies?”

 

“A back, like a kitty. Kitty name is a Cauldron,” she said, carefully sounding out his name so Harry would hear it clearly.

 

“Your kitten told you his name?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“And his name is Cauldron.”

 

“Yes. Good name.”

 

The kitten happily meowed at Harry as he was given a name, and then Miri clapped and squealed as she noticed where she was being taken.

 

“A garden! A play in garden?”

 

“Yup. We’re going to play in the garden, baby, just me and you.”

 

“Caya push me on swing, poh-lease?”

 

“Absolutely.”

 

Harry put her down and Cauldron leapt to the ground, stalking off to do his business in the weeds. Miri took Harry’s hand and led him over to the swings.

 

Because of the size of the garden, and the amount of kids they had (actual kids and kids at heart), the family had made the decision to invest in industrial size play equipment, the kind found in public playgrounds.

 

There was a climbing frame, a range of slides in different sizes, swings, a roundabout, a see-saw, and little wooden animals on springs that rocked back and forth.

 

Miri loved the toddler swing, with its bars to keep her safe as she was pushed. She could use her magic to make it move, but she preferred to have someone push her that she could babble at as she moved. Dorian liked the ‘big boy swings’. Big bouncy bucket seats that cradled him as he played. He really liked the huge hammock swing, which was big enough for him to curl up with a grown up and cuddle while they rocked.

 

Harry settled Miri in, made sure she was comfortable and started up the swing. She babbled her dream at him, going on about the birdies and the butterflies she’d imagined.

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

“You are certain of this?”

 

“Yes,” Albus said sadly. “There is no doubt, he admitted it himself.”

 

Severus sighed and watched Harry and Miri out of the window, hearing her giggle and talk, seeing him smile.

 

“Percy,” Severus said. “I never would have thought something like this from any Weasley.”

 

“It’s since he moved out, apparently,” Albus said. “Fleur and his co-workers are adamant that Percy implied that you were a paedophile.”

 

“Severus, I am so sorry,” Molly said, mopping at her tears.

 

“Don’t be silly,” he said, crossing the room to hold her. “This is not your fault. Six out of seven of your children turned out wonderful. You can’t be blamed for one bad apple.”

 

“I can’t believe he said such things!” Sirius said. “I never thought I’d see the day a Weasley was such an absolute disgrace.”

 

“Me neither,” Remus agreed. “And for him to think such things…”

 

“Yes, it is worrying,” Albus said.

 

“Is the Minister going to take action?” Severus asked.

 

“Percy will be spending the night in a holding cell. The Auror’s are going to question him today about his allegations, to determine what he believes and how he came to such conclusions, and then question some more tomorrow. As for what is to become of him…no one has an answer for that just yet.”

 

“We can’t let him go around saying things like this,” Charlie said angrily. “All it takes is the wrong comment in front of the wrong person and someone could end up dead. Fuck! Does he even think about what comes out of his mouth!”

 

“Charlie, calm down,” Molly urged. “Getting yourself worked up isn’t going to help anything.”

 

“Maybe not, but he’s put all of us at risk. He makes comments, logs an official complaint, Harry and Severus get investigated, and now the family is front page news.”

 

“It’s not a situation any of us are happy with,” Anne said, getting up to make more tea. “But it has happened, and now we need to deal with it. The paper is printing a retraction and an apology.”

 

“Yes, and the Minister only wants a written report from Tonks on what she’s witnessed, and another from Sam or Jack regarding Miri’s health,” Albus said. “He only wants them for procedural reasons, so he can complete the file and close it. Cornelius doesn’t want this anymore than we do. It’s shining a light on the Ministry, and he doesn’t want that.”

 

“Yeah, someone might start to question his leadership skills,” Charlie muttered. “If he can’t even keep his staff under control.”

 

The fire sprung to life and deposited Arthur, who looked destroyed.

 

“The Minister came to my office, told me…”

 

“We know,” Severus said. “And I do not blame you, Arthur. You are a wonderful man. This is Percy and Percy alone. He has come along to these conclusions and decided to make his own way with them.”

 

They sat and discussed it for a while, all the time with someone watching Harry to make sure they weren’t caught unaware.

 

“So we’re all agreed?” Sirius asked. “We don’t tell Harry who it was.”

 

“Agreed,” Severus said. “I do not want my husband convicted of murder. Even if he did bring it upon himself.”

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

It was the first time Harry had gone out without Miri, but that wasn’t why he was nervous. Solarin and Sam and Mad-Eye had all assured him that she would be fine without him for a few hours.

 

Harry was nervous because of what he was about to do.

 

“We don’t have to do this,” Severus promised. “If you’re unsure, if you’re not ready.”

 

“No, I am, I’m ready,” Harry reassured, fiddling with the flowers he held. “I’m just…nervous.”

 

“Understandable. This way.”

 

They made their way through the village of Godric’s Hollow towards the church and attached graveyard. From there it was a matter of walking up and down the rows to find the right markers. It was Severus that spotted them, and he led Harry over.

 

The marble headstone proclaimed it to be the final resting place of Lily and James Potter.

 

Harry laid his flowers and then leaned back against Severus.

 

“Do you think…it hurt?” he whispered. “When they…”

 

“No,” Severus said. “I have always like to think of it happening very fast, so fast that they didn’t feel a thing.”

 

“I like that. Tell me more.”

 

Severus squeezed him, resting his head on his shoulder. “Well, I know from the reports of that night that James was first. He was found in the living room doorway. It’s assumed he was headed to the front door to stop the Dark Lord. The reports mention that his eyes were open, so he didn’t even have time to close them.”

 

“Really fast then.”

 

“Yes. Very fast. Lily…she was found in your nursery, in front of your crib. Her eyes were open too.”

 

“That’s good. I like that it was fast, that they weren’t in pain.” Harry stroked Severus fingers. “Was I hurt? Apart from my head, I mean.”

 

“No. Sirius found you, got you out. He said, in the report, that you were confused, and distressed, but you were not harmed aside from the obvious.”

 

Harry was quiet for a long time, and Severus let him be. His own mother was buried in Devon, where her family had been from originally, and Severus hadn’t been there in a very long time. But he remembered what it was like to stand before her grave and try to make sense of it all in his mind.

 

Eventually, Harry moved and Severus followed, trailing him out of the graveyard and into the town square. Harry stopped and stared at the statue for a moment before moving closer to read the inscription. As they got closer, the obelisk transformed into three figures of white marble.

 

It was a memorial to Harry, Lily and James.

 

Captured in stone were the three Gryffindor’s, Lily held by James, baby Harry in Lily’s arms.

 

“We look happy,” Harry murmured. “I think we were. It feels happy here, like I was happy here. Does that make sense?”

 

“Perfect sense.”

 

“I want to see it. My house.”

 

Severus took his hand and led him through the village until they got to the Potter’s house. It was a very beautiful village, full of quaint little houses and inhabitants that still waved hello to anyone they saw. It was the sort of place where people could legitimately leave their doors unlocked without fear, where everyone knew everyone else.

 

Harry made sure not to look too closely at any elderly people they passed. It was entirely possible that they had known his parents before the Fidelius charm, and they might recognise Harry and try to draw him into a conversation he wasn’t ready for.

 

There were several shops, a post office, a pub, and the little church. Harry reasoned that it was probably where he’d been Christened, if there had been a ceremony. There was almost certainly a village school close by; Harry possibly would have attended it, had Lily and James lived.

 

The Potter’s house was a rather pretty house, or it had been. A small two bedroom cottage not far from the statue, in what Harry thought was a Tudor style. White walls, black beams that were slightly crooked in the way things almost always were in the Wizarding world, leaded diamond windows and a sturdy looking chimney. The garden was overgrown, but it had probably been a very picturesque yard.

 

The hedge had grown wild in the years since that night. There was rubble in the waist high grass, like little islands in a sea of green. Most of the cottage was still standing, though entirely covered in dark trailing ivy, but the right side of the top floor had been blown apart.

 

“My room was there?” Harry asked, pointing at the missing part of the house.

 

“Yes. Lily told me it faced east, so you would get the morning sun.”

 

Harry reached out to touch the gate and then pulled back his hand as if he’d been burnt. He didn’t want to touch it. It was almost as if he might disturb the peace of the place if he did.

 

“Why is it like this?” he asked. “It’s all broken still. It’s been sixteen years.”

 

“The house is yours,” Severus said gently. “No one had the legal right to touch it. Also…”

 

Severus reached out and placed a hand on the gate, and before them a plaque sprung up, words bright on it.

 

_On this spot, on the night of 31 October 1981,_

_Lily and James Potter lost their lives._

_Their son, Harry, remains the only wizard ever_

_to have survived the Killing Curse._

_This house, invisible to Muggles, has been left_

_in its ruined state as a monument to the Potters_

_and as a reminder of the violence_

_that tore apart their family._

 

All around the bright words, other witches and wizards had left their own messages, scrawled as they visited the home of the Potter’s. Some of the messages were simple messages of good luck, others were heartfelt, saying how sorry they were that such a tragedy had happened.

 

“If the house is mine…what do I do with it?” Harry whispered.

 

“You need not do anything with it,” Severus said gently. “It is yours, always has been, always will. For now, we live in London with your fathers. Perhaps someday you might like to have it rebuilt and live in it, or perhaps have it torn down and build a different house. Or just leave it as it is.”

 

“I don’t know. Maybe I’ll just think about it for a while.”

 

“Also a valid course of action.”

 

Harry and Severus lingered for a while, staring at the house. Harry could see a little bit of his nursery through the missing part of the walls. Lots of yellow. Walls, what was left of the curtains, and Harry could just spot an alphabet picture, but all the letters were off, sort of slumped against the bottom of the frame, and it took Harry a while to realise why.

 

“The pictures…they were magical.”

 

“Hmmm?”

 

“The alphabet, in my room,” he said, pointing to them.

 

“Oh. Yes, it was. It was a gift from your grandmother, I think. If it’s the one I’m thinking of. James enchanted it. The spell must have worn off after he passed.”

 

“Can we…maybe…go inside?”

 

“Possibly, but I wouldn’t, not today anyway,” Severus said, looking at the cracks in the bricks and plaster, the deep reaching ivy. “Doesn’t look particularly sound.”

 

“Oh. Maybe…we could come back sometime. Have someone take a look at it, make it safe. Can we do that?”

 

“If you’d like.”

 

“Harry? Are you Harry?”

 

They turned to find a woman looking at them from her own front garden. She was fifty or so, with dark hair and eyes and a wide smile. Her skin was a beautiful mahogany.

 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you or intrude,” she said, leaning against the wall. “I just…you look so much like him, I wondered if you were him.”

 

“Him who?” Harry asked.

 

“Harry, the baby that lived there,” she said, motioning to the damaged cottage. “I always wondered if he might come back someday, if I might get to give him…”

 

“Give me what?”

 

“You are Harry! I knew it. You look so much like James. But those eyes…they’re hers. Lily’s. Oh, look at you. All grown up. At Hogwarts are you?”

 

“You’re…”

 

“I’m Melinda. I’m a Squib. Lily never held it against me though. She was a good woman. Such a sad night.” She waved a hand. “I’m sorry, you don’t want to be listening to me blathering on. I’ll give them to you and let you get on. Got to pick up my grandson from school anyway. Just a mo.”

 

She disappeared inside and left them standing there stunned.

 

“Do we think she’s genuine?” Severus asked.

 

“I think so. She’s kind of familiar, like I’ve met her before. Which would make sense if I lived next door. Maybe I have met her before.”

 

She returned with a handful of photographs and a huge white cat, bigger than Crookshanks.

 

“You can have the pictures, I’ve no use for them except to say I used to live next door,” she chuckled. “But I wasn’t sure if you’d want him.”

 

“You want us to take your cat?” Severus asked as Harry accepted the pictures.

 

“Oh! No. He’s not mine. Potter is Harry’s. After that night…poor thing needed a home.”

 

“He’s my cat?” Harry questioned, shoving the photo’s into his pocket and holding out a hand for it to sniff. “Really? I didn’t know I had a cat.”

 

“Yes. Well, he was bought for you, when James found out Lily was pregnant. And he’s not just a cat, he’s a Kneazle. Goodness!”

 

The cat, apparently called Potter, had leapt from her arms and into Harry’s, where he curled up and purred. Harry carded his fingers through the wild white fuzz and scratched behind an ear, making him meow up at him, turning bright blue eyes on him.

 

“I see. Am I your human, is that what this is?” Harry said to the feline, managing not to laugh.

 

 

“Right. That’s that then. Uhhh. How do you get a cat through the floo?”

 

“I have a carrier for him,” Melinda said and disappeared inside once more.

 

“Kneazle’s are very loyal,” Severus said. He held out a hand and smiled when Potter let him pet him between the ears. “James probably wanted a familiar for you. Like we got Cauldron for Miri.”

 

“Is taking care of one of these any different from a regular cat? I mean…feed him, groom him, let him out to do his thing in the weeds. That’s all the same, right?”

 

“Yes. Crookshanks will show him the ropes.”

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Molly was making bread when Dorian came running in, panic all over his little face.

 

“Oh, baby boy!” she soothed, scooping him up with her floury hands. “What’s the matter?”

 

“Mummy’s huwt! She in the bathwoom and she not waking up and thewe’s blood!”

 

Molly handed him off to Anne and hurried from the room, running up the stairs and using the doorframe to stop herself at the bathroom. She started to knock but stopped when the door swung open, revealing what had scared Dorian.

 

Solarin laying on the white tile, unconscious, blood pouring from her, covering the floor, soaking her clothes, her hair, her skin. She was deathly pale, almost blue.

 

“Oh, sweet Merlin,” she breathed.

 

Molly crossed the room and knelt down, trying to rouse her daughter-in-law with no success. There was so much blood, so very much.

 

“Oh God,” Jack said. “Anne called Sam and me, I got here first.”

 

He set to work, mopping away some of the blood, trying to find its source while hooking her up to all sorts of tubes and wires. She had no idea what he was doing, but it comforted her to see him do something.

 

It seemed an age before Sam arrived and between them father and son lifted her up and Apparated away, leaving Molly to comfort her grandchildren.

 

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

 

Bill and Severus felt like they;d been in the waiting room for years, decades by the time Sam came to update them

 

“She’s stable,” he said and the two men let out sighs of relief. “But she’s not out of the woods.”

 

“What’s happening to her?” Bill pressed and Sam took a seat.

 

“We’re not entirely sure why, but her body has started to reject her own uterus. Her magic has pushed down on it, basically crushing it.”

 

“And that caused the bleeding?”

 

“Yes. I am so sorry. She came to me and I thought it was just a period, that the potion she was given in the attack was making it worse. I never thought it could be so serious. I am so, so sorry.”

 

“Sam, stop,” Severus said. “You weren’t to know, no one could have known.”

 

“He’s right,” Bill agreed.

 

“I’m still sorry.”

 

“I know,” Bill said. “So what do we do now?”

 

“I want to operate,” he said bluntly. “I can’t see any other way to stop what’s happening and keep it from happening again. Her magic will continue to put pressure on her, and her body is classing her reproductive capabilities as non-essential.”

 

“So you want to go in and repair things or something else?” Bill asked.

 

“I want to perform a complete hysterectomy,” he said bluntly. “Even from the preliminary tests we’ve done, it’s clear that this is the only option. She has no chance of ever conceiving biological children, we already knew that, so that isn’t a consideration as it would be in another woman. The bottom line is this: without this, she will continue to bleed and she will die.”

 

“She won’t agree,” Severus said.

 

“I know,” Sam said with a sigh, running his fingers through his hair. “I already tried. She told me to go fuck myself.”

 

“Simple, direct, classic,” Bill joked.

 

“Time wasting,” Severus finished.

 

“All of the above, and also dangerous,” Sam said. “She needs this surgery. But I can’t do it without her consent. Not only is it illegal, it’s unethical too.”

 

“I will talk to her. Bill, you call home, let them know what’s happening. Harry and I shall take care of Dorian and Daven tonight, Molly has her hands full with the twins, teething and all.”

 

Bill nodded and went off to the room set aside for relatives to call others, with good news or bad. Severus followed Sam down the hall.

 

Solarin was in the high dependency pre-surgery ward, which meant a large white room filled with equipment and very sick people. There were four beds, two of which were occupied. One was filled by a young wizard, roughly 12 or 13, who had a cage over his legs to keep the sheet elevated. A woman Severus assumed to be the boy’s mother was sat by his head, stroking his hair as he completely lost his cool. Tears were falling down his face and he was babbling absolute nonsense, something about being eaten by his homework and letting Santa Claus down.

 

“Pain meds,” Sam whispered to him as they passed. “She’s down the end. Good luck.”

 

Severus approached the bed where his sister lay and nodded at the nurse as she left Solarin’s side. Then Severus looked at the bed and he had to remind himself that he was a grown man with a daughter and not a scared teenager with a dead mother.

 

Solarin was pale anyway, she always had been. But with the blood loss she looked dead already. If it weren’t for the rise and fall of her chest, the beep of the heart monitor, Severus would have feared that he’d lost her already.

 

There was blood in her hair, matting it together, making it sticky. It stained her skin where she’d been laying in it, and it turned Severus’ stomach.

 

“I hear you’ve been causing trouble, miss,” he said, taking the empty chair.

 

“I’m going home,” she said. “I have to go home. Daven needs a feed, she’s due in ten minutes. And Dorian. I need to play Lego with him, I promised. And bath time, and bedtime. He needs his story. He always has a story.”

 

“Solarin, stop it. Stop, and listen to me. You are bleeding, sweetheart, and I don’t mean a tiny bit. You are gushing blood, and if Sam doesn’t do something to stop it you will die,” he said, knowing that he needed to be blunt to get through to his sister.

 

Solarin was terrified of the hospital, and had been ever since their mother died. Somewhere deep in her subconscious it had become ingrained that the hospital meant death. Every time she had to go near a hospital she lost her control.

 

“I don’t want to be here,” she whimpered. “Please, Sevus. Please don’t make me stay here.”

 

“I know, sweetheart,” he said, stroking her hair. “I know. But Sam will take very good care of you. And I promise one of us will be waiting for you when you wake up.”

 

Sam made his way over and hovered by the end of her bed.

 

“I don’t want it,” she cried and Severus grabbed a tissue to wipe her tears. “Please, I don’t. I’ll be good! I’ll be a good girl! Please, please, please!”

 

“Shhh, Solarin, calm down, sweetheart,” he soothed, climbing onto the bed so he could hold her close, the way he’d done when she was a little girl with a nightmare. “Oh, my baby girl. Come on. Sevus is here. Easy, darling. Come on, calm down. You are a good girl, you’ve always been a good girl. My good girl. Now I need you to be a brave girl for me and let Sam help you.”

 

“I don’t want to,” she argued.

 

“I know that. And I also know that there are a great many things in this world that all of us do not want to do. But we must do them, nonetheless. Thus, even though you do not want to do this, will you do it?”

 

“I will,” she sniffed.

 

“Good girl. Now, Sam has a form for you to sign.”

 

Sam came forwards and held out a clipboard and a pen, one of the Muggle ones he always seemed to have in every pocket. She didn’t even read it, just scrawled her name where he pointed and handed it back.

 

Bill arrived as Sam left to prep for surgery and the nurse returned to administer some potions.

 

Severus made to get up but stopped when Solarin whimpered and gripped at him.

 

“Bill’s turn, sweetheart,” he prompted and motioned to where the redhead was. It was all it took for her to let go of him and let him up.

 

Severus stood back and pulled himself together while Bill took his place, curling close to Solarin and whispering endearments to her.

 

“Harry and Severus are going to take care of the kids tonight, they’ve already said,” Bill assured. “And I spoke to Dorian, he knows you’re sick but Sam’s going to make you better.”

 

“Please, don’t make me stay here,” she begged.

 

“Baby, I have to. Just this one time. Get this done. Do you really want our babies growing up without their mother? Because that’s what’ll happen if you don’t do this. You’ll bleed out and you’ll die and me and the kids will be the ones left behind.”

 

“No, I don’t want that.”

 

“So what are you going to do about it?”

 

“Let Sam make it better.”

 

“That’s my girl,” he said, kissing her.

 

[I love you, wholly and completely, without question,] he said. [And I will be right here the whole time, every single second. I’ll be right here waiting for you. And when you wake up, I’ll be the first thing you see.]

 

[I love you.]

 

Bill got in a few more kisses and reassurances before they had to take her in, and then he gripped at Severus’ hand behind his back until she was out of sight. Then his knees went from under him.

 

Bill knelt on the floor, breathing deeply, and Severus let him be. The two of them in the corridor, pulling themselves together.

 

Bill felt it, the very moment she was put under. He felt the connection between them snap, broken in a way it never had been and his legs, which he’d finally managed to make work enough to make him stand, turned to jelly and he collapsed.

 

“Oh, shit.”

 

“Deep breaths, that’s a lad,” Severus urged, gripping his shoulders and hauling him up.

 

Severus wrapped an arm around him and led him to the waiting room, settling him into one of the chairs.

 

“They put her under?”

 

“Yeah. I don’t like it,” Bill said, wrapping his arms around himself. He was suddenly shaking, freezing. “It’s just gone, the connection. She’s gone.”

 

“No, she is just sleeping, a very very deep sleep. And when Sam has made this right, he’ll wake her up and she’ll come back.”

 

“Yeah. You’re right. It’s temporary,” he said. “I’m okay. I’m going to get some bad coffee and sit here and wait. You go.”

 

“Are you sure? I will stay if you need me to,” Severus checked.

 

“No. I’m okay, I swear. Go home and give my kids big kisses from their mum.”

 

Severus stood and stared down the corridor for a long moment, before he clapped Bill and the shoulder and forced himself to walk away.

 

Bill eventually got himself together enough to get that cup of coffee. He had no intentions of drinking it, but it was warm in his hands, took the chill out of them.

 

And then there was nothing left to do but wait. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for sticking with me and being so unimaginably patient with me.
> 
> Please, leave me a comment to let me know what you thought, what you liked, what you didn't, or just to yell at me for taking so long.


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are, the last chapter. I know I made you all wait so long for this, but I hope it's worth the wait.
> 
> There will be a sequel to this, pure fluff of their lives after the end of Lucius.
> 
> Oh, did I not mention that? Yeah. Lucius ends here.
> 
> Welcome to the last chapter of Salvation. Now, excuse me while I go cry in a corner.

Harry was woken by a child crying, and he had three possibilities for which child it was.

Severus had returned from the hospital and he and Harry had taken charge of Dorian and Daven, trying to keep things as calm and normal as possible. Dinner had been pizza takeaway, one of Dorian’s favourites, which arrived much faster than delivery as Remus had Apparated to get it, so it was piping hot.

Bath time was an experience. Dorian was bathed first, then Miri, and finally Daven. As each child was finished bathing, Harry lifted them out of the tub and to a waiting Severus, who dried and dressed, and then they went to Sirius, who cuddled and tickled while the kids waited for the others. At the end of it, the bathroom looked like a waterpark, but the kids were clean.

Finally, Harry gathered all three with him in Miri’s nursery. Miri and Dorian had taken a leg each and cuddled with him while he read them a story. Dorian fell asleep half way through and Severus carried him off to bed, and Miri nursed once the story was finished. Daven was happy enough to lie in her basket and watch her mobile, settling herself off to sleep.

Harry sat up in bed and Severus groaned, reaching for him.

“We’ve got a crying one,” Harry said and Severus mumbled something not safe for little ears. “I’ll go.”

Potter blinked at him as he left the bed and yawned before he leapt from the bed and followed his human. The cat had turned out to be a very faithful familiar. He followed Harry most of the time, and watched over Miri when Harry told him to. She liked to read him stories and chatter away to him as she drew pictures. He was happy to let the little girl put jewellery and clothes on him, so long as she kept dropping treats for him over the tray of her highchair.

Harry checked the bassinet by their bed and smiled. Daven was fast asleep, both arms thrown over her head. His next stop was Miri in her nursery, who was curled on her side, cuddling her stuffed dragon. Cauldron looked up from his perch on the rocking chair and blinked at him.

Harry picked up his white fluff-ball as he left the nursery.

“And that leaves one,” he said. “Go back to bed, stay with Severus. I’ll be back.”

Potter licked at his fingers and leapt to the ground, padding off to bed. Harry took the stairs to Dorian’s room, where the little boy was sitting in bed crying.

“Oh, little man. What’s wrong?”

“I had an accident,” he whispered, absolutely mortified. “I sowy, Uncle Hawy. I sowy.”

“No, it’s okay. We all have accidents. How about we get you a nice warm bath and some clean pyjamas and then you can come and cuddle with me and Severus? Sound good?”

Dorian nodded and Harry helped him out of the damp bed, leading him to the bathroom where Harry settled him into a warm bubbly bath.

“Maybe I should have taken you to the toilet before the story,” Harry mused as he sponged warm water over the tiny shoulders.

“I didn’t mean to. I has bad dweam, and then I was wet.”

“I know you didn’t mean to. It was an accident. It’s okay, everyone has accidents.” Harry looked down at the tiny boy and was reminded, quite forcefully, of his own childhood. “You know, this is your home. We’d never let anything happen to you. You know that, don’t you?”

“Even wivout mummy and Daddy? Me and Daven stay?”

“Oh, baby boy. I’m sure your mummy will be okay, I’m sure Sam’s taking good care of her. And your daddy is only there so your mummy isn’t alone. But even without them, you’re a part of our family. You and Daven will always stay, this will always be your home, and we will always be your family. Sophia and Dudley were really silly. They couldn’t see how amazing you and your sister are. That’s why you came to us. You belong here, where you’re wanted.”

“Petunia and Vewnon didn’t want me.”

Harry sighed, stroking his curls. “They didn’t want me either.”

“Weally?” Dorian demanded, eyes huge.

“Really. They didn’t want me because I can do magic. But my life was different then. I didn’t have Remus and Sirius; I didn’t have friends. I had nowhere else to go, I had to stay with Vernon and Petunia.”

“Why? They’s mean!”

“Yes, they are, but Petunia and my mummy were sisters, so they were the only family I had back then. And I was very sad for a very long time. But then I met Uncle Ron, and he was my very first friend, and Auntie Hermione. And then so many others and things got better. I found my family, where I was meant to be. And so did you. And so did Daven. It doesn’t matter where we came from. It only matters where we are now and where we end up.”

“Why didn’t they wants us?” Dorian asked, his eyes huge in his tiny face, his voice tiny.

“Because they don’t understand. And people are afraid of things they don’t understand. And when they’re afraid, they get mean. It’s not your fault, or mine. It’s something that they did.”

“Okay.”

“Okay. Now. Let’s get you into some clean jammies and come and cuddle. Yes?”

“Yes!”

Harry dried him off and dressed him before scooping up the sleepy child and carrying him back to his room.

“A little visitor, I see,” Severus said as they entered. He was sat in bed giving Daven a bottle.

“I had an accident,” Dorian whispered.

“Oh dear,” Severus commiserated. “Well, best thing for that is a nice cuddle. Probably not as good as mummy or daddy, but we’ll do our best.”

Dorian snuggled down between them and gripped at Severus’ pyjama shirt while Harry burped his sister and returned her to her basket. Then he curled up between his uncles and settled down to sleep.

Harry waited until he was sure Dorian was asleep before whispering, “I really hope she pulls through this.”

“You and me both.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

It was a terrible feeling, Bill decided, to be able to see his wife but not feel her. It probably wouldn’t have been as hard for any other husband to sit there, but for him it was endless.

Sam had brought her to recovery and told him that the surgery had been flawless, that she’d be absolutely fine. Sam had said she just needed to sleep off the anaesthesia.

But Bill couldn’t feel her in his head, so he couldn’t believe she would be okay.

Even when she had been gone, he’d still had the faint warmth in the back of his head letting him know that, somewhere, she still existed. He wished he had known it at the time, known what a comfort it was.

To see her in a starched white hospital bed, to hold her cool hand, and yet have no sense of her being there, having nothing in his head. The silence was deafening. It was horrific in a whole different way than seeing her covered in blood. It was loss more absolute than her leaving him.

And then he wasn’t alone.

It began with a spark, a tiny flame in the dark, and then it grew, until it was warm in his head. The muscles in his shoulders relaxed, and with it came the easing of the headache behind his eyes. There were no words, just like when she fell asleep each night. Her mind was too foggy to talk. But he could feel her, which was enough to calm to churning of his stomach.

“Bill?”

“Hey,” he soothed, smoothing back her hair. “I’m here. You’re okay, it’s all okay.”

“Mmmm. My head,” she mumbled, sounding drunk as a skunk. “Feels big. Is-t big?”

“No, it’s head sized,” he chuckled, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “I promise.”

“Belly hurts.”

“Sam should be back soon with some nice narcotics, but I can call him now.”

“No. Stay,” she begged, reaching for him weakly. “Stay. My Bill.”

“It’s okay, baby. I’m right here, not going anywhere.”

He settled back into his seat and let her grip his hand, stroking her hair and face with his other, telling her how much he loved her until a nurse came in and motioned that she would get Sam. The good Healer appeared in moments.

“Welcome back,” he said, leaning over her and taking her pulse. “How do you feel?”

“Foggy. Belly.”

“Well, we had to give you an awful lot of anaesthetic to get you under fully, so it will take time to wear off, but you’re getting there,” he said as he took her blood pressure. “We’ve given you something to help counteract it, but I’ll give you a top up, see if we can’t clear that fog. And the pain is to be expected. We just removed organs, expect pain. I’ll give you something for it. For the moment, I’d like you to stay off food, but you can drink if you want. We’ll try food in a few hours.”

“Can’t you use a charm or potion?” Bill asked. “Wouldn’t that be safer, and faster?”

“Not for Solarin. She has a lot of magic flowing through her body as it is,” Sam explained as he began to pull back the blankets, trying to get to the site of the surgery with as little jostling of Solarin as humanly possible. “Adding more would just overload her system. I know it’s frustrating, but I promise the Muggle way is the safest for her.”

“I didn’t mean…”

“I know. It’s okay. Most people know nothing about witches like Sol. And, as far as I know, most Healers have no clue with regards to her care.”

Bill didn’t look as the stitches were uncovered and some liquid that made her wince wiped over it.

“Don like’t,” she complained. “Bill. Make’t shop.”

“Shop? Oh. Make it stop,” Sam said. “Almost done, sweetheart, I’m sorry, I know it doesn’t feel very nice. It’s an antiseptic to fight possible infection.” He threw away the used equipment and covered her with a new dressing before tucking her back in and reaching for a vial and syringe. “All done, and looking very good. Your magic is already working to heal you. Okay, this is the stuff to help you wake up,” he said, injecting a measured dose into her drip, “and this one is for pain, some good, old fashioned morphine. Give it a few minutes to kick in.”

“When can I take her home?” Bill asked as Sam stripped off his gloves and prepared to leave the room.

“You can take her home when I say so,” he said with a smile. “Sorry, badly timed joke. I’m not sure, but it definitely won’t be today. I’d like to get her moved up to the ward in a few hours, once she’s really back with us. After that, it’s a matter of taking it day by day.”

Bill glanced at Solarin, who seemed to be sleepily watching the sunrise out of the window, the sky a glorious display of the most amazing rainbow of colours.

“Sam, she hates it here.”

“I’m aware. But she’s just had major surgery. I promise, as soon as I feel she’s stable enough, you can take her home. But for the time being, she needs medical help. Patience, Bill. I won’t keep her any longer than I have to, I swear it.”

Bill reluctantly nodded and Sam left them, off to check on some other patients.

“Home?” Solarin asked.

“Soon, Arin, I swear. Sam just needs you to heal a little bit before he can let me take you home,” he soothed and she nodded.

“I want to sit up,” she said after a while, the sky a beautiful blue.

Bill grabbed the bed instructions and uttered the charm to make the head of the bed rise slowly. Once she was relatively up, he adjusted the pillows and blankets.

“I feel like shit,” she said honestly. “But not in pain and less fuzzy, so there’s a plus.”

“Definite plus,” he agreed, passing her the bottle of water she’d been trying to grab. “Ask for help, crazy woman. Work with me here.”

“I’ll work with you if I can see my children today.”

“No problem. I’ll go home and clean up in a while, and then bring them to visit. That work for you?”

“I’d much prefer to go home to them, but I’ll soldier through. Neither of them are up yet anyway.”

“I don’t know, Daven might be.”

“No, they’re still sleeping,” she assured, tapping her temple.

“Right. You know, I’m fairly certain my mother hates you a little for that. Jealousy is an ugly thing.”

“It’s handy. So is this,” she said, motioning to her abdomen. “Just think. No more Charm. No more periods, no cramps. Really, this is a win.”

“Arin, don’t bullshit me.”

“I’m not! I’m serious. This can be a good thing.”

“Sure, a good thing. Apart from the fact that you could have fucking died and had to have your entire internal reproductive system removed in emergency surgery, but yeah, absolutely, cramps being gone is the most important thing.”

“Bill, take a breath,” she said. “I didn’t mean it like that, and you know it.”

“You could have died. Fuck, you could have fucking died,” he breathed and he felt himself curl inwards, resting his forehead on the mattress beside her hip. Her fingers tangled in his hair and he shivered.

[I didn’t,] she assured.

[I couldn’t feel you. In my head. It was quiet, so quiet. There was nothing, not even that little warm spot in the back.]

[I know how scared you were, I can see it, feel it. Take a deep breath, really deep. And then let it sink in. I’m still here. I’m a tough bitch.]

“My tough bitch,” he said, sitting up so he could look at her, see her smile. “Tell me more plus sides to this.”

“No more worrying about your swimmers going in circles,” she said after a moment, a wicked smile on her lips. “No more needing to buy pads and tampons. No worry about bleeding on the sheets. And we can have sex every single day of the month.”

“Always finding the silver lining.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Charlie opened his pack and pulled out the strawberries.

Marybelle growled at him for a moment before she spotted the fruit and then she began to bounce at him, her tail wagging. Charlie wondered how long she was exposed to a dog for her to have picked up the behaviour.

“Hey, pretty girl,” he crooned, opening the box and settling down, throwing the berries for her one by one, like candy for her giant mouth.

He had always considered Solarin one of his closest friends. She had been a spunky little witch in school, always keeping everyone on their toes, but there had been something in her that had made Charlie want to protect.

The way she made his brother smile was more than enough for him to punch anyone who went after her. Over time he had gotten to know her and she had become as much his friend as she had been Bill’s. She’d helped him with Potions, and he’d helped with Herbology. She’d taught him about cheeseburgers and Saturday morning cartoons and arcades at the seaside. He’d shared his mum’s care packages with her and sent her wizarding cosmetics he’d bought with his pocket money.

She was the truest friend he’d ever had and she could have died.

By the time Hatton joined him, he was out of fruit and Maribel had let him hold each of her eggs.

“I saw your name on the sign in sheet and thought I might find you here,” he said, sitting with the redhead. They watched as the great beast preened, neatening her nest. “So why are you here on your day off?”

“Just needed some space to think.”

“Something bothering you?”

“My sister-in-law was taken to hospital last night. Major haemorrhage, emergency surgery.”

“Oh, Charlie. I’m so sorry. How is she?”

“Still out of it, last I heard. My nephew was a wreck, he’s the one who found her, and the bathroom…there was a lot of blood. I think we’re going to have to replace to grout.”

“Is she going to be okay?”

“I don’t know. Probably. She’s a tough little witch. It’s just…seeing her like that, knowing she was so sick. I guess I got so used to her being pretty much indestructible…she’s been through so much.”

“My mama was like that. She was so strong, so independent. We never worried about her being able to take care of herself, never wondered if she’d be okay.”

“It just…”

“It’s hard to see such strong women when they’re vulnerable,” Hatton finished for him and Charlie nodded. “It’s a tough thing, realising they’re breakable.”

“I don’t know how to see her any other way now,” Charlie admitted shamefully. “How do I go visit her and not treat her like glass? She’s the scariest, most powerful witch I’ve ever met and all I can think about is how broken she is.”

“You get past that part, I swear. It’ll get easier the more you see her as healthy and whole. For now, I’m guessing she feels pretty delicate herself. It’ll take time for all of you to deal with this. Do you know what surgery she had to have?”

“Complete hysterectomy.”

“I don’t know what that is.”

“She had to have her lady parts removed,” Charlie said with the first smile he had shown since the whole mess started. “Womb, ovaries, fallopian tubes. Her magic was crushing them, so the doctors had to remove them.”

“That’s…wow. That’s big.”

“Yeah. She never does anything by halves.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Bill managed to time his return home perfectly.

As he was only there to pick up things for Solarin, he had been hoping he wouldn’t be seen by his children. If he was, they would want their mother, and he knew he didn’t have the strength to say no. As it was, he managed to arrive ten minutes after Severus had left with Dorian to pick up some potion ingredients, and five minutes after Harry managed to get Daven down for her nap.

“How is she?” Molly asked, following him up the stairs to his room.

“I said in the kitchen, she’s going to be fine,” he said.

“I know, but it’s such a big thing for a woman, losing…that.”

“Mother,” he said calmly, turning to face her. “She was bleeding to death. Plus, we have two beautiful children and we didn’t need her womb to get them.”

“I meant having a major piece of anatomy removed,” she said gently, rubbing his arm. “So much blood, and such a huge surgery. What’s Sam saying?”

He sighed and sank down onto his bed. Someone had changed the sheets.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean…Sam, he’s putting on a good front, but he’s worried. He’s also blaming himself, thinks he should have known something was wrong, which is stupid. How could he possibly have known? It was perfectly reasonable for him to think it was just because of the potion.” He scrubbed his hands over his face, groaning. It hit him that he had been awake for almost two days.

“Get some sleep,” she said, stroking his hair.

“No, I’ve got to go back, I said I’d take her some stuff.”

“I’ll take it, or one of your brothers. One of us will. Just a few hours. Then, when you wake up, you can take your children to see their mother.”

“Yeah, okay. I’ll pack the stuff. Sam said she’d need help, a shower or a wash, something.”

“No problem. Now, what does she need?”

“I have no clue. Uhhh. Toiletries, I guess. So she can clean up,” he muttered, wandering to the bathroom. Molly followed him with a bag she’d grabbed from the back of his bedroom door.

“Toothbrush,” she prompted.

“Right.” He grabbed it and a tube of toothpaste, then a flannel and her body wash and shampoo. He added her deodorant and perfume to the growing pile in the bag. He folded her towel and bathrobe, and the fuzzy slippers she wore when she had a cold. Molly put in a pack of pads.

He returned to the bedroom and picked out some underwear, then sweatpants with cartoon snakes on that Charlie had given her as a gag gift and then a sweatshirt that used to be his but he hadn’t managed to wear since she came back from the Muggle world. The pair of pyjamas she’d worn the first night after Dorian had come to them, the pair she was wearing when he cried for her in the night.

It took him a moment to actually be able to sit at her dressing table.

He remembered the first morning after she’d come back, when he’d woken up expecting it to all have been a dream, Tonks asleep on the floor. Waking up alone in bed, tilting his head and seeing her sitting right where he was now. He’d watched her put on her make-up, watched her brush her hair. It had been the thing he had missed the most without realising he missed it.

“Does she wear it every day?” Molly asked gently, resting her hands on his shoulders.

His fingers touched over the bottles and jars, tubes and pots, a rainbow of colours. It surprised most people who saw her cosmetics. They always assumed she wore predominantly dark eye colours, and lipsticks. They didn’t realise she was usually more sedate, day to day. There were a few pinks and purples, some green because a Slytherin she still was. Lots of red shades, because he’d told her once that he loved her in red lipstick.

His favourite was the one she saved just for him, for when she wore her feathers and lace and the moonlight played over her bared pale skin, her hair like liquid silk between his fingers.

“Yeah. She…she starts with this,” he said, picking out a tube, selecting the containers he saw used most often. “Then this on her eyes, and this one. Then a little bit of this one, right here.” He motioned to his cheekbone. “And this one, on her lips.”

Molly helped him pack up a cosmetics bag, putting in the brushes and make-up remover he didn’t know to add, and then Solarin’s hairbrush and a few bands. He added the book she had just started and the stuffed snitch Dorian had left on her bedside table.

“Is that it? Do you think she needs anything else?”

“No, I think that’s probably it.”

She put the last few things into the bag before zipping it and putting it on the floor. She pulled back the blankets and waved her wand to blackout the windows.

“Now I want you to get some sleep. Just a few hours. You’re no good to her if you’re passed out with exhaustion.”

He didn’t even try to argue with her, just toed off his shoes and laid down, letting her tuck him in and press a kiss to his forehead.

He was asleep before she closed the door.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Molly arrived at the hospital just as Solarin’s painkillers wore off.

The younger witch had been moved up to a recovery ward, but given a private room in an attempt to keep her mind quiet. It was a shame she couldn’t be given something to stop her abilities for a while, it would have made healing a lot simpler.

“There you are,” Molly said, setting the bag down on the over-bed table. “I got all turned around. First they sent me to emergency, then to pre-op, then to post-op. Finally, I found Sam and he sent me in the right direction.”

“And here you are,” Solarin gritted out. “Where’s Bill? And the kids?”

“Bill’s having a sleep, he’s no good to you if he passes out, and the kids are at home. He’s going to bring them in a little bit, when you’ve had a chance to clean up and he’s made himself more human.”

“Good.”

Molly busied herself with unpacking things and straightening while Solarin breathed through the growing pain.

“Easy now, easy. That’s it, that’s a good girl. Breathe deep, that’s it,” Molly soothed, holding her close.

Solarin couldn’t remember her mother holding her the way Molly was. She vaguely remembered Lily holding her once, and maybe McGonagall, one very rare time when she’d just started Hogwarts. But never like this, never like a mother.

Molly stroked her sweat-soaked hair, managing to grip her tight while grabbing her wand and summoning a nurse, who looked shocked by the state of Solarin. It was only a few minutes before Sam arrived, looking worried.

“Damn it, you shouldn’t have burned through that morphine so fast,” he mumbled, measuring out a syringe of clear fluid. “I’m sorry, I didn’t think you’d go through it so fast.”

“It hurts,” she whimpered. “Molly, it hurts.”

“Shhh, it’s all going to be okay. Just keep breathing, it’ll kick in soon. Hold on, baby, hold on.”

It took a few seconds for the morphine to start working, and this time Sam made sure to give her a dose and a half, praying it would get her through a few hours. Once it had kicked in, he took her vitals, noted them down on her chart, and went off on his rounds.

“There now, much better,” Molly said. “Now, let’s get you cleaned up. Can you stand?”

“I’m not sure, I haven’t tried yet.”

“Well, let’s try then.”

Molly helped her free her legs and swing them over the side of the bed. Slowly, Solarin pulled herself up standing using Molly’s support, and then stood there, taking stock.

“That feels so weird,” she said. “It’s like my legs aren’t really mine. I mean they are, but still.”

“I remember after the twins I felt that way. Like I wasn’t all there. You’ve lost a lot of blood, it’s normal to feel not so normal,” Molly assured, helping her shuffle forwards. “You’ll be feeling just like yourself in no time.”

“Good to know. Why is there a thousand miles to the bathroom?”

“Just feels like that. Come on, that’s a girl. Little more.”

They shuffled into the bathroom, an awkward little dance, until Molly could lower Solarin into the chair in the shower cubicle. She left her there while she retrieved toiletries and towel and then knelt down to look at her.

“Now, how about a shower, get all this dried blood off?”

“Yeah, that sounds nice.”

Solarin had little modesty to begin with. Severus had raised her with a healthy respect for human nudity, that it was nothing to be ashamed of, that she should be free to show what she liked as long as she was comfortable with it. True, he wasn’t always comfortable, but it was her body, her choice, and he had never been happy dictating the physical displays of others.

Plus, Molly had seven children, there was very little she hadn’t seen before.

Molly untied the gown and Solarin angled her arms so it slid down, a crumpled heap on her thighs. About an hour before Molly had arrived, Sam had removed the dressing, leaving an exposed angry line on her belly, and removed the catheter and drips too. Her magic had already achieved several weeks of healing.

Sam was working blind with Solarin’s care. There was no record of any Augur needing major surgery, but then again there was no record of any living as long as she had. He’d already seen that she healed fast, that she needed less care than the average witch, but it was still major surgery. Her internal healing seemed to be a little slower than anything externally visible, but he wasn’t worried.

The gown was dunked into the waiting laundry bin and Solarin held the showerhead while Molly adjusted the taps to a good temperature, just shy of scalding. Most of it Solarin could do herself, if Molly handed her the soap and other things. But her hair was impossible, she simply couldn’t raise her arms. Molly wrapped her in a towel so she didn’t get cold and she tilted her head back.

“I used to do this for Ginny, until she grew old enough to do it herself,” Molly murmured as she soaked the black waterfall. “And I did it for Hermione, when she had the twins. Oh, but you have such lovely hair.”

Neither of them mentioned the river of blood splattering the tile beneath the chair.

“Severus used to do it, when I was little,” she said, relaxing into the gentle fingers on her scalp. “Bill does it sometimes. Sometimes I do his.”

“Men always seem to do it better,” Molly agreed, turning off the flow while she applied shampoo.

She took her time working up a lather, gently scratching at her scalp, working at every last strand. She rinsed it and began again, and then a third time, until the lather remained white, not pink with blood.

“There, that’s better,” she proclaimed as she squeezed out the last of the final rinse water.

Again there was the shuffle dance to get Solarin up and dried and back to the bed so Molly could help her to dress and get back in.

“That was exhausting!” Solarin complained with a laugh as Molly tidied up.

“But we did it,” she smiled, draping the damp towel over the back of the chair.

“Yes we did.”

Molly held out the bag of makeup and Solarin accepted with a grateful smile.

“Perfect. Now I don’t have to worry about scaring anyone with the bags under my eyes.”

Slowly, the waxy pallor of her skin disappeared under a careful layer of foundation and concealer, a little blush, some mascara and the application of just the right amount of lipstick. Before Molly’s eyes, Solarin transformed herself from death warmed over to her usual pale self.

And not a moment too soon, as Dorian peeked around the door just as she closed her lipstick.

“Mummy?”

“Hi, baby boy!”

He gave a huge grin and looked back out to the hallway, where Bill appeared with Daven in his arms, blowing raspberries to herself.

Bill leaned over and kissed her, handing Daven over without being asked because he was worried, not suicidal. Keeping either child from his wife would result in something very violent and painful for him, and he didn’t fancy it. So he helped Dorian up onto the bed so he could drape himself over Solarin’s legs, gripping the fabric at the hip of her sweatpants.

“My mummy,” Dorian murmured as she started stroking his hair.

“I’m right here, baby,” she soothed. “I’m okay now. Uncle Sam made it better.”

“Weally?”

“Really. I still need to get all better, but I’m mostly better.”

“That was lots a blood, mummy.”

“I know, but it’s all over with now. No more bleeding from me, I promise. Were you a good boy for Uncle Harry and Uncle Severus?”

“I was. Uncle Hawwy wead a stowy ‘bout a beanstawk.”

“A beanstalk, huh? Was there a giant at the top?”

“Yeah! He had a magic hawp!”

“Oooohhhh. What did you have for dinner?”

“Pizza. It had pineapple!”

“Sounds yummy.”

Dorian squirmed, his little fingers toying with the fabric he held.

[I sowy, mummy.]

[Sorry? Why are you sorry, baby?]

[I had an accident in my bed,] he whispered and she wished she was mobile enough to hug him the way she wanted to.

[Oh, baby, it’s okay. You didn’t mean to.]

[I still sowy.]

[I know. Thank you for telling me. You’re my good boy, my brave boy.]

“Hey, family time,” Sam said as he entered.

“Hi, Uncle Sam.”

“Hi, Dorian. How are you today? I heard you were a very brave boy yesterday. I heard you were the one who found your mummy in the bathroom.”

“I did. There was lots a blood.”

“Well, that must have been really scary to see,” he said gently, perching on the end of the bed and rubbing Dorian’s back. “But you didn’t panic, you went and got your Nana, so we could help mummy. That was very brave.”

“My brave little hero,” Solarin said and Dorian beamed.

“Hey, Dor, do you think you and Daven could go with Nana Molly for a few minutes, so I can have some grown up talk with mummy and daddy?”

“I come back?”

“Absolutely.”

“Okay. I be back, mummy. I pwomise,” the tiny boy said seriously as he climbed off the bed, patting her knee.

“Okay, I’ll be right here,” she assured, kissing Daven’s hair as she handed her to Molly.

Molly took Dorian’s hand and he waved as she led him from the room.

“Right, how are you feeling?” Sam asked, taking Solarin’s pulse. “You look a little better, now you’re cleaned up.”

“I feel a little better. The morphine is still working, but my legs feel like jelly when I stand and I can’t really raise my arms too high.”

“Good, very good. You know if you were a regular witch, you’d probably still be hooked up to a drip and monitors and have a drain in the incision site. But, you’re not,” he admitted as Bill took a seat. “Frankly, I’m not absolutely sure I know what the best course of action is. I know you don’t like hospitals, but I’m really reluctant to release you so soon.”

“Why? Is there something that means you have to keep me in?”

“Procedure. You had major surgery, procedure dictates you spend at least two days in our care, bare minimum. Plus the amount of blood you lost was very substantial.”

“Put aside procedure,” Bill said. “Focus on what you know of her. I know it was serious, but is there really a reason to keep her here?”

Sam groaned. “I knew it, I knew this was coming,” he said, throwing himself to his feet. “Damn it, I’m calling Remus. I can’t handle this shit.”

He strode from the room and Bill blinked at the closing door. “What just happened?”

“He’s sick of his patients destroying all the medical training he had,” she said, reaching for him. “There’s a certain order to things, the way they should be done, but none of us really have them apply.”

Bill carefully climbed onto the bed, holding her close and pressing a kiss to her lips. She kissed back, tugging at his hair.

“You in pain?” he murmured against her lips.

“Not really. I was before, but now my good friend morphine is partying with me.”

“Ah, good old morphine.”

The door swung open and Sam returned with Remus and Severus. “Uh oh, the big guns,” she joked as Remus came forward to give her a careful hug. Bill slid off the bed and let Severus hug him before he stood back and let the elder Snape at her.

“You scared me half to death,” he hissed, stroking her hair, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

“You seemed calm when you convinced me to have the operation,” she argued.

“Yes. Good actor, aren’t I? You terrified me, young lady.”

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, gripping his arms. “I’m sorry, Sevus.”

“So you should be,” he said, stepping back. “Now, Sam tells us there are some issues surrounding your care. Solarin, what is it you wish for?”

“I want to go home as soon as possible.”

“Sam, how soon is it possible?” Remus asked.

“I honestly don’t know,” he admitted. “For any other witch, I would say no way, absolutely no way. She’d need to be here at least another 2 days, preferably a week before I’d even think of discharging her. The problem is she’s not any other witch.”

“What problems are you finding?” Severus pressed.

“Her healing rate, for one. It’s both faster and more unpredictable.” He looked at Solarin and she nodded, relaxing back into her pillows as he exposed the incision site to show them. “This was an open surgery, there was no chance for keyhole. A huge 12-inch incision. Yet she’s already done three weeks’ worth of healing in less than 12 hours. I can’t tell you how long it’ll take her to heal, nor can I say that her healing will all be this straightforward. Without the morphine, she was in immense amounts of pain, but she burned through the dose, that should have lasted at least 4 hours, in about two hours.”

“That’s worrying,” Severus mused. “Immediate or slow?”

“Immediate release. I’m reluctant to use potions, I don’t want to make her magic flare.”

“Okay, we try extended release the next time she needs a dose,” Severus said. “If my memory serves, it’s supposed to last around 12 hours, so it should be a better remedy for her pain.”

“So I can go home, right?” Solarin prompted.

“No, you can’t!” Sam cried. “You’re barely out of a major surgery where I removed a few organs, things which are pretty substantial.”

“Stop upsetting the good healer,” Severus ordered. “You will stay until he says otherwise, and not a moment less.”

Sam sighed, scrubbing a hand through his hair.

“Okay, here’s the deal. You’re here until tomorrow morning at least,” he demanded. “If you make it through the night with no problems, I’ll reassess and we’ll take it from there.”

“You’re sure you can’t let me go home sooner?”

“Not a chance.”

“Then I guess I can behave.”

Molly poked her head around the door. “Can we come back in or do you need more time?”

“It’s fine, I’m done for the time being,” Sam said and Dorian barrelled in, letting Bill pick him up and put him on the bed. He snuggled into Solarin, careful of her belly.

Sam updated her chart and left them to it, aware of Remus following him as he made his way to his office. He headed straight to his couch, a place he’d spent many a late night napping in-between bouts of paperwork.

Remus shut the door firmly, ensuring the occupied sign was flipped, and looked at his pack mate. Sam looked exhausted and terrified, the very picture of a scared young man. Remus knew Sam was blaming himself, and he shouldn’t be. He had done everything he could in exactly the way he was supposed to.

Sometimes Remus worried that they all asked too much of Sam, that he was under too much strain by medically caring for members of his own pack. Yet Sam would have it no other way. He considered it his duty, his responsibility, to care for the members of his pack. His wolf saw it as care in the same way feeding and protection were.

Remus joined him on the sofa and held him close, running sure fingers through his hair before guiding his face to rest in the crook of Remus’ neck. Sure enough, Sam started inhaling deep lungful’s of Remus’ scent, letting his alpha soothe him.

“Remus,” he whimpered, gripping at his shirt.

“Deep breaths, pup, deep breaths,” Remus urged, holding him tighter, winding his fingers into his hair. “Calm down. You did nothing wrong.”

There was a careful knock at the door and then Sirius appeared, closing it behind himself. Remus beckoned him over and they sandwiched the healer between them. Their scents mingled, pheromones mixing, until Sam was surrounded by the safety and trust of his alpha and beta.

They calmed him, holding him between them until he’d stopped trembling, his grip slack.

Eventually he drifted off, secure and safe in his pack, surrounded by their love for him.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Harry watched Miri colour and worried.

Severus had gone to the hospital, something about Solarin being difficult, leaving Harry alone with his daughter. Remus and Sirius had disappeared, and everyone had found something to do and Charlie had vanished somewhere and all Harry could think about was how dangerous it was for Miri to be an Augur.

What if someone decided to punish her, the way they had Solarin? What if the Ministry brought back the registration of Augurs? What if something happened to him and Severus? Who would protect her if he was gone?

“I can practically see the world burning under your scary world-saving thing,” Ron said, leaning in the doorway.

The situation with Solarin had brought Ron and Hermione home to care for their children and free up Molly while she was needed.

“’Scary world-saving thing’? I do not!”

“You really do,” he said with a grin, settling on the floor with Miri.

“Unca Ronnie draw!” she declared and dropped a colouring book onto his lap, pushing her crayons closer.

“I guess that told me,” he chuckled. “Is Carrier drawing?”

“No. Caya do homework, Daddy say.”

“Ah, I see. So, Carrier, what homework are you doing?”

“Herbology.”

“And how is that going?”

“Fine.”

“And would you like to tell me what’s actually on your mind, because I know for a fact that you’ve been watching this little lady for the last ten minutes as if someone is going to snatch her,” Ron said, picking a red crayon. “Last time you looked at her like that, it was just after that unfortunate birthday gift.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Harry, you need to.”

He sighed and accepted the picture Miri toddled over to give him, hugging her and pressing a whole string of kisses to her cheek, making her squeal in delight. She threw her short arms around his neck and smacked her own kisses to his cheek.

She was starting to push her own emotions out when she was filled with them, as if her tiny body couldn’t hold them in, and he could feel the love she had for him, how much she adored him. He could also feel how much she loved the blue crayon, but she was a year old, it was expected. Yesterday she had loved the yellow.

“Where’s Hermione?”

“In the kitchen.”

“Can you get her to watch Miri? And then I’ll talk.”

Ron handed the red crayon to Miri and pressed a kiss to her curls before he disappeared, returning with his wife and twin babies. Miri abandoned the colouring to join them at the blocks and Harry followed Ron out of the room, downstairs and out into the garden.

“Harry, I know I’m not Severus, but I am your friend. I care about you. I’m just trying to help,” Ron said as Harry poked aimlessly at the flowers.

“You can’t help.”

“At least let me try! You think you’re the only one who cares about Miri? I love that little girl as much as I love Cat. Do you really think I could stand it if anything happened to either of them?”

“Cat isn’t an Augur,” he murmured and Ron sighed, running his fingers through his hair.

“No, she’s not. It’s worrying me too, the thought of someone doing that to Miri. Sol didn’t deserve any of what happened. But Severus would never abuse Miri, so she’s starting off better than Sol did, and Miri has all of us. Harry, I swear to you, I will never ever let anything happen to her if I can help it. I swear it.”

“Ron, what if something happens to me?” he whispered. “What if something happens and she’s all alone, like I was?”

Ron strode across the grass and held him tight, feeling Harry grip at his shirt.

Harry was not as Ron had always known him to be. The boy he met on the train when they were eleven, the one who faced a dragon, the one who saved the world. Lucius had managed to destroy that version of his friend. There were pieces left, slivers of who he used to be. But his uncertainty, his self-doubt, the utter destruction Lucius had left behind had overcome all of it. Harry would never truly heal, he would never be who he was and Ron mourned that fearless boy.

“I promise she will never be alone,” he swore, pulling back and forcing Harry to look at him. “I promise she will always be with people who love her. If something happens, if you aren’t around, if something happens to Severus. Harry, there’s me and Hermione, Remus and Sirius, my parents, Nixie, Sol, Bill, all the rest of my brothers, Sam, Tonks. Dumbledore will NOT interfere, I won’t let him. She will be raised in the magical world by people that love her.”

Harry nodded, wiping at his eyes.

“I keep telling Severus to forgive Dumbledore, that being angry at him isn’t worth it. But I’m angry at him, I’m so angry,” he admitted. “The Dursley’s couldn’t have been the only option in the entire world, I refuse to believe that. And he couldn’t have been blind to how I was treated, not with Mrs. Figg just down the road. I didn’t deserve what I got, Ron, and I just don’t understand why I did,” he said, settling onto the garden bench.

“Have you asked Dumbledore about it?”

“I’ve tried, several times. He just brushes me off, telling me it was for the best, I needed to be protected.”

“What about Sirius and Remus? Have you asked them?”

“No. It’s hard for them to think about the years they lost. And Severus didn’t even like me for my Hogwarts years.”

Ron sighed, watching as Potter the cat slinked across the grass to the weeds they left growing for the cats to use. Cauldron was following him, the little kitten happy to chase bees and butterflies and pounce on a particularly shifty looking dandelion.

“Harry…do you think…maybe…it might help if you talked to someone?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean someone who can help. A…head healer or whatever they’re called. Someone who can help you deal with this.”

“No, I can’t,” he said immediately. “I appreciate the suggestion, but no. I can’t tell a stranger about…anything.”

“Okay, okay. Then how about we all sit down as a family? We can all sit down over a nice dinner and talk some things through. Severus can air his issues, you can ask your questions, and we can have solid plans in place for the future. Have solid plans for the worst happening.”

“You think that would help?” Harry asked, picking a daisy from the grass to fiddle with.

“It would help me,” he said with a small smile. “Not to be blunt, but we did some crazy shit in our days at Hogwarts. I’m not stupid enough to think our crazy shit is over. If something happens to me or Mione, I want to know my children are safe.”

“Okay. When Sol comes home, we’ll talk.”

“Good. Until then, just try to relax. I know it’s hard, but being this tense can’t be helping anything.”

“What do you recommend?” Harry mused with a grin. “A spa day, maybe?”

“Laugh all you want, I look fabulous in a face mask.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Sam released Solarin from his clutches the day after her surgery. She was eating and drinking, and had done six weeks’ worth of healing in 48 hours. She was only on light painkillers for lingering soreness, so Sam had seen no real reason to keep her.

After dinner that night, once the kids were in bed asleep, the family gathered in the living room to talk.

“What’s this all about?” Arthur asked Ron.

“Me and Harry wanted to clear some things up,” the younger Weasley said. “Look, Solarin is special, but so is Miri. We need to be clear on what happens to her if Harry and Severus aren’t around, and while we’re at it, we need to set in place the same plans for the other little ones.”

“This is a rather morbid conversation,” Albus said as he appeared in the doorway.

“This is a conversation you were NOT invited to,” Harry snapped, shooting to his feet.

“Harry!” Remus said. “What’s gotten into you?”

Severus shook his head, standing behind his husband. “Harry, love, what’s gotten you so worked up?”

“Make him leave, I don’t want him here,” Harry demanded and Severus shared a look with Sirius.

The Animagus took care of it, ushering the shocked Dumbledore out and down to the Floo before returning.

“The Floo is locked. Someone want to explain?” he pressed, looking between Ron and Harry.

“We don’t trust Dumbledore,” Ron said. “Not with our children.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Molly laughed. “He’s Albus Dumbledore, greatest wizard in the world.”

“He’s manipulative and neglectful,” Hermione countered as Severus managed to get Harry to sit back down. “Molly, look at the facts, and I don’t mean his skill as a wizard. He left Sirius in Azkaban for over a decade, a decade in which Remus could have died from the separation. He did nothing to help either of them through that. And then the Dursley’s. I refuse to believe that there was not a single person in the entire world that could protect Harry. I absolutely refuse, point blank, to accept that he didn’t know what those poor excuses for humans were doing to him!”

“He’s made mistakes,” Oliver put in.

“Big ones, huge ones,” Severus said. He sighed and held Harry close. “So all this time you’ve been telling me to let it go…Harry, have you been angry at him this whole time?”

“Not the whole time,” he offered. “Just the last year or so.”

“Since Miri,” Sol added.

“Since Miri. I just…”

“Take a deep breath, pup, and try to put it into words for us,” Remus urged gently.

“I was Miri’s age and he sent me there. Remus, he didn’t even knock on the door. Hagrid told me. He left me on the doorstep. Who leaves a baby on a doorstep! I would never ever be so stupid. I could have woken up and crawled off, I could have been snatched, I could have gotten sick, I could have been attacked by a cat or fox or something else. If he was so worried about my safety, why the hell did he leave me on the doorstep!” Harry couldn’t stop himself, it was all pouring out. “They hated me, despised me, treated me like something they’d stepped in, and I had to stay. I begged him to let me stay at Hogwarts over the summer, to find me anywhere else to go. He wouldn’t even think about it.”

“You never said anything about this,” Molly said, absolutely stricken.

“They put bars on my windows and a cat flap on my bedroom door to feed me. Your sons didn’t steal that car for the hell of it.”

“We tried to tell you, mum,” Fred put in. “We tried to tell Dumbledore, and McGonagall. No one would listen to us.”

“No, McGonagall did, remember Freddie?” George corrected. “She said she’d talk to Dumbledore about it, and then she told us he’d sorted everything.”

“He didn’t sort anything,” Severus said. “The faculty were never told anything about any of this. As far as we were all concerned, Harry was a pampered prince at home. It wasn’t until later that Albus admitted what it was like.”

“How much later?” Sirius asked.

“After the defeat of the Dark Lord.”

“So Dumbledore did nothing, said nothing, until his goal was achieved,” Anne said darkly.

“Anne, no,” Molly begged. “Albus is not a bad person.”

“He left my son to suffer,” Anne said, her voice dangerously quiet. “Almost thirteen years I had to watch my son fade away. You didn’t see Sirius when he came back, you didn’t see the shadows in him, the darkness that place put in him. I went to him, to Dumbledore, and I begged him to do something, anything. Anything so I would have to watch my son suffer. Do you know what he said? He said Remus had been foolish to promise himself to someone so volatile. That was the last time I asked that man for anything. He let my boys suffer.”

Remus’ jaw had dropped, his mouth working silently as he processed what his mother had just said. All the years he had been alone, how close he came to losing his mind, how very sick he had gotten. About a year after Sirius had shown up at Hogwarts, the bond between them had been pushed to its absolute limit with the separation. Remus had almost died that night; his uncles had sat with him with his mother had gone for Sam and then desperately tried to find Sirius.

His Uncle Jim had prayed for the first time since he was a boy.

Sirius pulled him in, holding him tight. Sirius wanted to kill someone, rip something to pieces, but he couldn’t, not at that moment. Remus and Harry needed him to be an adult, to be strong for them. He could blow off steam later.

“We’re getting away from the point,” Ron said.

Ron had become massively mature since he got married. It was as if all his childish tendencies had been subdued with the ring sliding on his finger, and they were almost completely gone by the time the twins were born.

“Which point?” Bill asked.

“The point is, me and Harry don’t want Dumbledore near our kids if something happens to us,” Ron said. “We want to talk about it, to put plans in place so that if something does happen, they’re taken care of.”

“I thought that would be obvious,” Molly said. She was sitting with her arms crossed, glaring at her youngest son.

“Mum, you’re not helping,” he argued. “It’s like you’d rather believe everything of Dumbledore because he’s Dumbledore. Harry lived through this, he’s the evidence that Dumbledore isn’t a saint. But this isn’t about him. This is about my children, about Miri, and Dorian and Daven.”

“I just think after all he’s done for the Wizarding World, for this family, that he deserves our trust and respect,” she said.

“I don’t,” Harry hissed. “I don’t trust him, and I don’t respect him. And he will never, ever, get his hands on my little girl.”

They watched as he stormed from the room and Severus sighed.

“Well done, Molly,” he said. “Do you have any idea how hard it is for him to ask for things? How much it takes to get him to express needs and wants? For him to have gathered us here, he truly believes in what he’s saying. He truly believes Albus can’t be trusted with Miri’s welfare, and I can’t argue otherwise. He managed to dredge up the courage to sit down and talk this all out with all of us and you refused to even listen.”

“Albus is a great man,” she argued.

“But still just a man,” Solarin countered. “He’s human, just like everyone else. And just like everyone else, he makes mistakes. In his case, those mistakes have huge consequences.”

“Can we please focus!” Ron yelled. “This isn’t about Dumbledore, or whether or not we trust him. This is about what we, as parents, want for our children’s futures. I want to know that, if something happens to me and Hermione, Cat and JoJo will be safe, and happy, and loved. I don’t want plans being made for their future without our say so.”

“Quite right,” Arthur said. Molly looked like she was ready to continue arguing to defend Albus until the end of time, but his agreement with Ron stopped her. “So let’s have that discussion. If something happens to you both, who do you want to have custody of the twins?”

“Personally, I want them to go to Harry and Severus,” Hermione said. “I want them to be raised with Miri, and I know that they love them just as much as we do.”

“We love them too,” Fred said.

“I know,” she soothed. “This isn’t about how much you love them. We know you all love them very much. This is about the kind of upbringing we want for them if we aren’t around.”

“This is ridiculous!” Molly spat. “They would come to Arthur and I, no one else! We’re their grandparents! We’re the ones caring for them day in and day out!”

“So we can finish school,” Ron said, scarily quiet, his face like thunder. “You agreed to help us, that you wanted us to finish Hogwarts. We agreed because you offered, because you’re my mum, not so you would throw it back at us the first time we don’t agree with you.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it!” she said, her face a mask of shock.

“Then what did you mean, mum?” Charlie asked. “Because it sounded like you think you know better than the rest of us.”

“I’ve been doing it longer, that’s all. I just meant that Catherine and Joseph would come to me and Arthur automatically if something happened.”

“Not if Ron and Hermione file legal documents stating they have other wishes,” Oliver said. “They can file papers stating custody of the twins goes to whoever they choose. Times are changing, Molly. Legally speaking, Harry and Severus are Catherine and Joseph’s godparents. They do have, in modern wizarding law, a higher claim to the twins than you if something happens.”

“What?” she breathed, horrified.

“It’s true. The laws are changing, people are looking at what’s happened, what the consequences of it are, and the law is changing. Bloodline is no longer seen as a great status. In fact, most people are shying away from giving priority to blood relatives.”

“So what does that mean?” Severus asked.

“The Ministry is starting to send out letters to all parents in the UK, to have them register their wishes if something should happen to them. You register the decision at the Ministry, and that gets consulted if the worst happens.”

“Like social services?” Hermione asked.

“Exactly. A whole new branch of the Ministry is being created right now,” Oliver said. “For too long it’s been the culture of the Wizarding World to simply assume that blood family is the best choice for a child. But how many are abused and neglected and no one does anything to stop it? Our children are potentially at risk, and the government wants a stop to it.”

“Will all parents be investigated then?” Harry asked from the door.

He wandered in with a sleeping Miri in his arms and cuddled into Severus.

“No, not at all. It just means that there will be a system in place to make sure what happened to you won’t happen again. An orphaned wizarding child will go to the person best suited to care for them, which will most likely be a blood relation, but it won’t automatically be.”

“Good.”

“I can bring you the forms home with me tomorrow if you want,” Oliver offered. “You can get it done before the mass rush to do it.”

“It doesn’t need doing,” Molly argued, and Ron looked ready to throttle her. “The system we have now has worked for hundreds of years. Family takes care of its own.”

“It hasn’t worked,” Bill said. “Mum, it hasn’t. Would You-Know-Who have gained power if it had worked? Dad being passed over for promotion year after year? Harry being used the way he was? Even Lucius taking him. Mum, the system has to change, it just has to. Times change, people change. You and dad have always argued against blood purity and now people are picking up that thread.”

“Going to the Dursley’s, is that really what was best for Harry?” Charlie asked. “The way Lucius raised Nixie? How about Tom Riddle being thrown in an orphanage? If there had been rules in place, if there had been some sort of system there to watch over magical children, do you really think that all would have happened?”

“The new rules, the new department, it’s only to ensure safety and the welfare of the vulnerable of our society,” Oliver said. “No one is saying family is a bad thing, nor are they saying everything about the old systems were wrong. We’re just saying that things need to adapt to the times we live in.”

“I think this is a welcome development,” Anne said.

There was a round of agreement and then general talk as the family started to disperse for bed.

Harry curled into Severus once Miri was safely back in her crib and sighed.

“I was a pawn, wasn’t I?” he asked, picking at the sheets.

“That question doesn’t make any sense, love,” Severus admitted.

“To Dumbledore. I was his pawn. Severus, did he even want me to survive the war?”

“Harry, I don’t think…oh, I don’t know! I honestly don’t know what he was thinking. Honestly, a lot of conversations with him, statements he made, they seem suspicious now.”

“Think about it,” Harry urged. “He put me with those people, so when I got to Hogwarts I was vulnerable and unloved, I’d latch onto the first person who came to me. Which…was Molly. Severus, she’s a Pureblood witch and she was walking through Kings Cross talking about Muggles at the top of her voice.”

“Are you suggesting Molly was working with Albus to manipulate you?”

“I don’t know what I’m suggesting, I’m just thinking aloud. It just…I look back and so many things seem off now.”

“Do you question the Weasley children? Arthur?”

“No, I don’t think it was any of them. Just her. She’s so blindly loyal to him, so determined to hear only good things that she shut us down tonight. Severus, she was so certain she knew better than Ron.”

“Do you think she would try to take the twins?”

“I didn’t even mean that, but now you say it, yeah, I do. I think she’d do it.”

“How do Ron and Hermione feel?”

“I don’t know, I’ll talk to them tomorrow. But a part of me doesn’t want her here anymore,” he admitted. “Severus, if I’m right, if she did work with him to get me exactly where he wanted…then I don’t want her near my baby.”

“We’ll deal with this, Harry, I promise. We will get to the bottom of it.”

Harry levered himself up and joined their lips, licking at them until Severus opened, granting him access. Harry sighed as long fingers threaded through his hair and he climbed astride his husband.

“What if you hadn’t fallen in love with me?” Harry asked, stroking Severus’ forehead with a thumb. “What if we hadn’t gotten together?”

“But I did, and we did, and I love you, very much.” He massaged Harry’s hips. “I would marry you again every single day for the rest of my life.”

“Good then that I plan on sticking with you.”

“Very good.”

Severus joined their mouths again, sweeping his tongue forward, stroking Harry’s, tickling the roof of his mouth. Harry kissed back with just as much enthusiasm, their cocks hardening between them.

“How do you want it?” Severus whispered as Harry waved his wand to turn out the lights.

Harry liked the lights off, he said it felt closer that way, better, more special. All they had was touch and taste and the way they felt. Severus preferred them on, so he could see every detail of his lover. They managed a good balance of the two. They usually compromised with two or three candles. Tonight it was just the light of the crescent moon.

“Not sure. Do you have a preference?”

“There is one thing I’d like to try…How do you feel about perhaps trying a little anal play?”

“Oh. That’s…that’s a new one. What do you mean by anal play?”

“Some touching, fingers, maybe touching inside. All gentle, all to your pleasure, I promise.”

“Could we…maybe, could we do it the other way? I mean, your inside?”

“Ah,” he said with a kiss. “You would like to top me?”

“Is that what it’s called?”

“Yes, the penetrating partner is sometimes called the top, the receiving partner is the bottom,” he explained. Harry slid his hands down and gripped the hem of his t-shirt.

Severus obediently raised his arms, reciprocating and removing Harry’s when he was freed. He immediately found his lips, stealing kisses, his fingers stroking Harry’s hair. He stripped Harry off, tossing away his clothes, kissing and caressing skin as he went.

Harry reciprocated and then amused himself by sweeping his hands over Severus’ bared skin.

“You know, I have no idea how to do this,” Harry admitted. He wasn’t ashamed of not knowing. He wasn’t a fool, just uninformed. The Dursley’s hadn’t been exactly forthcoming in the sex education department, and Hogwarts was woefully lacking. It was a wonder there weren’t more teenage parents at school.

“It’s not so complicated,” Severus promised. He pulled out the lube and handed it over. “Just touch me how you think I would like, and I’ll let you know if I do. Hmmm?”

“Yeah, I…I think I can do that.”

Severus went where Harry put him, which was on his back. Harry explored his body, touching places he knew would make Severus wriggle and sigh, licking the ones he knew made Severus moan.

When he nudged Severus’ thighs, he obediently opened them, lifting his knees to let Harry access what he wanted to. As he expected, Harry knelt between his thighs and went straight for his cock. He wrapped his hands around it, stroking and squeezing. His hand on his balls made Severus moan loudly and Harry smiled, satisfied with his results.

“Having fun?” Severus asked with a smirk.

“Loads. Do you like it?”

“Oh, very much.”

Harry leaned up to kiss him, letting Severus take most of his weight so he could slide a hand back down. He flicked a nipple on his way, and followed the trail of hair that led to something he very much enjoyed.

And wasn’t that an incredible thing? Harry actually enjoyed sex, enjoyed Severus’ body, his cock, his seduction. He loved being kissed and held and touched. When Lucius had had him, he had thought he would never enjoy it. All his life, he’d avoided being touched, avoided sharing his physical self with anyone. Petunia had seen to it that he detested himself as much as he possibly could, and Harry suspected that her opinions of his body and its natural processes came from her opinions on her own desires.

But sex was not wrong. When it was between two consenting adults, it was incredible. There was nothing shameful or dirty about being with Severus, about enjoying himself with his husband.

He let his hand drift down, further than he ever had. The skin behind Severus’ sac was surprisingly soft and smooth. He had expected more hair, but it was pretty sparse back there. Severus shivered as Harry stroked him there, and Harry decided he liked that patch of skin.

It was strange to touch his lover there. The ring of muscle was tight and wrinkled and hot, hotter than the rest of him. Severus gasped as he pressed it carefully with the tip of a finger.

“It doesn’t hurt,” he assured his young spouse. “It’s just been rather a long time since that was touched for pleasure.”

“Is it too much?”

“No, not too much. It’s just a feeling I’d forgotten.”

Harry nodded and kissed him again as Severus grabbed the lube. He let Severus coat his fingers before he lowered his hand again and stroked his hole. That got a tiny whimper to escape Severus and a shift of his hips. The shift moved Harry’s finger against the ring and caused the tip to push in suddenly, forcing a startled sound from Severus.

“Should I stop?” Harry asked.

“No, don’t stop.”

Harry watched Severus face as he carefully pushed a little more in. The tight seal gave way to his probing digit, and Severus bit at his lip and took shuddering breaths. His hips moved a little, clear enough to Harry that his touch was wanted and enjoyed. In and out, in and out, again and again, letting a little more slip past the tight muscles with every thrust in of his finger.

“Harry, my love, please,” Severus begged, shifting his hips, stroking his hair. “I’d like another one. Please. Another finger.”

Harry grinned as he pulled his finger out completely and pushed in his first two together. He repeated what he’d been doing, but with the two. It was tighter this time, but Severus seemed to like it, so he carried on.

Severus was moaning high and needy, his hips pushing down so he could get more, and Harry felt incredibly powerful. Knowing that he could cause such pleasure in someone he loved, that his touch made Severus feel so very good. It did wonders for his ego.

“N-now, Harry, love, there- oh holy God!- inside….mmmm….there’s a part – oh fuck – there’s a part of me that feels very very very good.”

“How do I find it?” Harry demanded. He wanted to see if he could make Severus finish just from his fingers. Severus had done it to him, it was only fair.

“Stop moving your fingers and I’ll tell you.”

Harry went still but didn’t pull them out. It was hot inside Severus, and slick from the lube, and the walls around his fingers were silky and sort of stretchy when he pressed at them.

Severus took a few shaky breaths and licked his lips before looking Harry in the eye.

“Curl your fingers up, towards the front of my body. Oh! Yes! Like that,” he instructed, jerking with the shot of sensation that burned through him as Harry turned his wrist. “Mmmm, very good, love. Now, it’s a few inches in. Ah, shit! Gentle, Harry, gentle.”

“Sorry! Sorry!”

“Shhh, it’s okay. Just gentle with me. It’s been a long time since I’ve done this.”

Harry pressed a string of kisses to his collarbone, gently sliding his fingers in and out again. As Severus had instructed, he was gentle with his touches, careful with how hard he pressed and how fast he moved.

“That’s it,” Severus breathed. “Oh, Harry. That feels so good.”

“Really? That good?”

“And more,” he promised. “Now, this special piece.” He broke off to gasp a few times as Harry’s fingers spread involuntarily, stretching him. “It’s…it’s a sort of bump type thing, a few inches in, towards the front of my body. That’s it, love. Take your time.”

Harry concentrated on what he felt, on the smooth flesh inside his husband. He knew he’d found it when Severus jack knifed off the bed, half screaming, gripping at the sheets. Okay, that was fun to watch. He waited until Severus was back on the pillows. And then he stroked it again, watching Severus jump as if electrocuted. Again and again he touched it, stroking and caressing. Severus writhed on his fingers, gasping and moaning, gripping at Harry and the sheets and his own hair, anything his hands landed on.

Eventually, the stimulation alone was just too much. He grabbed his hard cock and started to stroke but Harry stopped him. He pushed Severus’ hand away and replaced it with his own, stroking him hard and fast until he exploded over his own belly.

He pulled out his fingers once Severus had stopped clenching around them. He left Severus in his pleasure haze and slipped to the bathroom for a damp cloth, cleaning his hand and Severus while he waited for his husband to regain the power of speech.

“That was absolutely incredible,” Severus rasped eventually, grabbing the water bottle from the nightstand, taking deep gulps.

“You know, I did assume it was good,” Harry joked. “Just a hunch I had.”

“Smart arse.”

“Are we talking about my arse? Because I thought we were still on yours. Or…in yours.”

Severus laughed and pulled him in, kissing him hard. “Little brat.”

“Your brat.”

“Always my brat. My brat with a very hard dick. How would you like me to satisfy your need?” he asked, nuzzling his neck. They were still experimenting with the words Harry liked to refer to his own parts. At the moment, he liked it called his dick and his holes. It might change, but for the moment that was what worked for him.

Harry took his hand and pushed it between his thighs, wrapping those long fingers around himself. Watching Severus reach such heights of pleasure had aroused him to the point of almost being there, so it took only a few strokes for him to come.

He gripped at Severus as he panted, kissing and nipping at his skin, fingers tangled in his hair and pressing into his shoulder.

Severus grabbed the damp cloth and cleaned Harry off before tucking him into bed, holding him close. Harry was quiet for a long time, so long that Severus assumed he had fallen asleep.

“I was thinking,” Harry murmured eventually.

“Mmmm?”

“About Miri. That maybe she’s ready for a big girl bed. Like a toddler bed, like Dorian has. She’s walking now, so the crib probably isn’t the best thing for her.”

“We can look in the attic tomorrow, see if there’s one you like. Or we could buy something.”

“Do you think she’s ready?”

“We’ll soon find out. You’re probably right, love. Walking seems to be a good indicator that she’s ready to move on from the crib.”

“We can give the crib to Sol for Daven. And…maybe potty training? Soon?”

“I think the rule of thumb for that is when she’s mostly dry at night and letting us know when she needs to go. Before she goes, that is. I’m sure someone will know, we can ask tomorrow.”

“Don’t ask Molly.”

“No, of course not, not with what you suspect. We’ll ask Anne.”

“Severus. If I’m right, if Molly was working with Dumbledore all this time, if I’m right about him. Severus, if I’m right, I can’t live with her. Either we move out or she does.”

Severus sighed and cuddled him closer. He’d known it had been coming, but it still wasn’t any easier to hear. Someone Harry had trusted, had loved as a mother, was now someone Harry didn’t want to talk to.

“We’ll see what happens tomorrow. Wait and see, love. You might be wrong. This could all be worry for nothing.”

“But if it’s not nothing?”

“Then we’ll handle it.”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Molly sat, frozen, at the table as the family pinned her with their stares.

“I don’t understand what you’re implying,” Arthur said. “You think Molly has done what?”

“I think she helped Dumbledore manipulate me,” Harry said.

“That’s ridiculous!” Charlie laughed. “Harry, I know you’re angry at Dumbledore but that doesn’t mean mum had anything to do with it.”

“Molly, we’re not accusing you of anything,” Severus promised, trying to calm the situation down. “We’re just trying to understand the extent of Albus’ machinations. It’s clear that he manipulated Harry, it’s clear that he manipulated all of us to some extent. We’re simply trying to understand how far that goes.”

“Alright, we’re doing this calmly. Harry, what is it you think mum did?” Ron asked, bouncing Joseph.

“First year at Hogwarts, at the station. I didn’t know how to get onto the platform, remember that?” Harry said and Ron smiled.

“Long time ago. Yeah, I remember. You and your short self.”

“Beanpole.”

“Titch.”

“Boys,” Hermione interrupted.

“Okay, okay. What about it?” Ron said.

“Have the Weasley’s always used the Muggle entrance to King’s Cross?” Severus asked.

“No, not usually,” Fred said. “We ran out of Floo powder.”

“And a Portkey or car could not have been arranged?”

“There wasn’t time,” George said. “Mum, remember, you said we had to…mum?”

“He didn’t manipulate you,” Molly said. “He was guiding you, that’s all. He asked for my help. I couldn’t say no.”

“Oh, shit,” Bill said. “Mum, what did you do?”

“I helped!”

“You walked through the station talking about Muggles at the top of your lungs,” Harry said darkly, his eyes wide in disbelief. “You made yourself a beacon so I would go to you, so I would latch on to you. Did you really not believe your sons when they told you about what the Dursley’s did to me? Or did he tell you to ignore it? Oh my God, oh my God.”

“Harry, breathe, pup,” Remus ordered. “Just breathe. We’ll sort this out, I promise.”

“You sent me food,” Harry said, tears in his eyes. “So much food. Pies and tarts and fudge. You knew, you had to have known. You didn’t want anyone to tell me about Sirius. Why? Everyone thought I was his target, why were you so dead set on me not knowing?”

“You were just a boy!” she cried. “We wanted to protect you!”

“How can I be protected if I have no clue what’s going on!” he cried and Ron handed Joseph to Fred. The older brother took him, and Catherine, out of the room, presumably to the playroom where Nixie was watching the other little ones.

“Molly, were you working with Dumbledore?” Sirius demanded.

“It wasn’t like that!”

“YES OR NO!” he roared.

“Yes, I helped Albus!”

Horrified silence met the declaration, and Harry backed away from the table, looking at her in shock. He pressed his hands to his mouth, tears filling his eyes.

“I trusted you,” he whispered. “I trusted you, and the whole time…”

“Harry, no, we were never trying to hurt you,” Molly begged. “Albus, he just wanted to protect you, to guide you. You had such an important task ahead of you. You weren’t like other little boys, and we had to guide you so you were ready.”

“Ready? Ready? How could I ever have been ready to die? I spent ten years being ground down by people who hated every last bit of me. I spent years being starved and ignored and neglected, being told I was dirty and worthless. And he let it happen. And then, when I needed someone, when I was all alone and isolated and so beaten down, he sent you in, you and all your mothering. But somehow you thought it was okay to ignore how thin I was. Every summer you saw me and how thin I was, and you did nothing. Molly, I was an abused child and you thought it was perfectly okay to manipulate me. For what? So I could be ready to do what everyone else was too scared to do? So I could be ready to die at fifteen?”

“No, Harry, no, I swear,” she pleaded. “We only did what was best.”

“Best for everyone else but me,” he said. “Severus, I meant what I said. Her or me.”

He walked from the room, leaving stunned silence in his wake.

“What did he mean?” Sirius asked. “Severus, what does he mean?”

“Harry refuses to live in the same house as Molly, now he knows the truth. Sirius, either she leaves or we do,” Severus said. “Harry is right. We cannot live in the same house as this woman. I will not have my husband and child around someone so blindly loyal to a man who thinks abuse of a child is acceptable. There is NEVER a good enough reason to leave a child in an abusive home.”

A murmur of agreement went around the table and Molly looked at them all, stricken.

“I’m changing the spell,” Sirius declared. “I won’t have that man responsible for all our safety.”

“Who’s going to be Secret Keeper?” Remus asked.

“Harry is. No safer person than someone who doesn’t leave the house.” He looked at Molly before turning back to his husband. “I’ll be back in twenty minutes, I need to get the potion and the spell. We’ll gather everyone in the playground across the street, and Harry can clue in the ones he wants to know. She,” he said, pointing at Molly, “is not welcome here. I don’t care where she goes or who goes with her, but she leaves my house by the time I get back.”

He kissed Remus and strode to the fireplace, leaving them behind.

Solarin was the first to move, leaving the room without a word. Many of the others followed, leaving just Arthur and Anne in the kitchen with the disgraced witch. Arthur shook his head and mumbled something about packing her things.

“I’ll get the twins things,” Molly said sadly.

“What twins?” Anne asked. “Molly…you can’t possibly mean Catherine and Joseph.”

“Of course,” she said. “I take care of them, they’re my grandbabies. Of course they’re coming with me.”

“Molly,” Arthur moaned. “That is not your choice. It is up to Ron and Hermione.”

“What’s up to us?” Ron asked from the doorway. He had Catherine in his arms, and he headed to the fridge, handing her a Sippy cup of juice.

“I was saying to them that I should go and pack up some things for the twins,” Molly said.

“And why would you need things for my children?”

“Because they’re coming with me,” she said, as if it were completely obvious.

Ron huffed out an incredulous laugh and then looked at his father. “Are you on her side?”

“I’m on no one’s side,” he said, trying to calm things.

“Then pick one!” he snapped. “Because there are sides in this, and I need to know which side you’re on. Dumbledore or Harry. Which one?”

“Harry,” Arthur said. “I’m on Harry’s side.”

“Right, now that’s clear,” Ron said, handing Catherine to Arthur. “Take her to Mione. I need to talk to mum.”

Arthur took the little girl, who happily waved bye-bye to her daddy, and stroked his son’s hair before he left.

“Listen to me, because I’m only having this conversation once,” Ron said calmly. “I’m not getting angry, I’m not arguing with you, I’m just putting the facts out and we’ll go from there. Okay?”

“Yes,” Molly said. She looked relieved, as if Ron was going to side with her.

“My children, and they are mine no matter what you think, will be staying here, in their home, with us, their parents. They will not be going anywhere with you. Mum, you thought it was acceptable to leave a child to be abused. Did you really think I would let you take them with you after finding that out?”

“But…but they’re my babies. I’ve been with them every day for their entire lives.”

“No, they’re not yours!” he spat. “How dare you! They’re not your babies. They’re ours, mine and Hermione’s, and I won’t let you take them. Right now, at this very moment, I’m not willing to even let you see them.”

“What about school!” she screeched. “You can’t take them to school, it’s not possible. Ron, we’ve had this conversation. You have to graduate.”

“We’ll work something out, me and my wife, their parents.”

“Ron, please,” she begged. “I wasn’t trying to hurt anyone. I only did what was best.”

“Best for who?” Hermione asked as she stormed in. “Because it wasn’t Harry, that’s for damn sure.” She folded her arms. “Arthur told me you think you’re taking my children with you.”

“Hermione, Ron, we all agreed,” Molly sighed, as if they were troublesome children arguing for more sweets. “The twins stay with me until you graduate.”

Ron rubbed at his eyes, wondering who this woman was, because this couldn’t possibly be his mother. His mother had tucked him into bed at night, and kissed his scraped knees, and stayed up with him when he was sick. His mother couldn’t possibly be the woman standing before him, demanding she take his children.

“No.” Ron looked up at Molly. “No, they stay with us. Right now, you don’t even know where you’re going to sleep tonight. You can’t take care of them right now, no matter what was agreed. Circumstances have changed.”

Molly looked between them and promptly burst into tears. She sank down in a chair and sobbed and didn’t stop, even when Arthur returned with a bag of her things.

“Come now, it’ll be alright,” he soothed. “Just for a little while, while things calm down.”

“What’s going on?” Sirius asked as he returned, arms full of spell and potions ingredients.

“Molly thought the twins were going with her,” Anne said. “I think it’s hit home what she’s done.”

“Good,” Sirius spat, arranging things on the table. “Where’s Harry?”

“Here,” Harry said, entering with Miri in his arms. He didn’t even look at Molly, pretending she wasn’t even there.

“Okay, I’m going to remove the Charm on the house, and then we’re going outside to the park, and I’ll walk you through becoming the new Secret Keeper,” Sirius said, chucking Miri under the chin. She giggled at him and grabbed his hand, pressing a kiss to it.

“We’ll start making our way over then,” Ron said. “Do you need anything else?”

“Parchment and quill and ink,” Remus said. “Harry needs to write it down to clue you all in.”

They all started to file out, picking up little ones, Arthur leading Molly out. Sirius finished up the spell, and they watched as the house glowed blue briefly. Sirius came out and took Harry to one side, leaving Miri with Severus.

“Okay, pup, it’s okay,” Sirius assured. “Once this is done, no one gets in that house without your say so. Now. I just need a little blood, so just let me have your finger.”

Harry held out his hand and Sirius pricked his finger with a ceremonial dagger. Blood welled up and Sirius squeezed it out into a vial of orange potion. It swirled, became red, and then went completely clear. The glass vial started to shimmer, fading in and out of being visible.

“Right, hold this,” Sirius said, handing the vial to Harry and squeezing his fingers around it. “Hold it tight. Just a little spell.”

He pulled out his wand after glancing up and down the street, and pointed it at his son.

“Sit in amet conjungi perferendam , occulat ille nobis salutem promisit in manibus nostris.”

Harry shivered as the magic swept over him, cold and hot in different places, and like electricity was shooting under his skin.

“Good, good,” Sirius praised. “Almost done, pup. Just drink the potion and I’ll help you say the spell, and that’s it.”

Harry chucked back the potion and gagged, going to his knees with his hands over his mouth as he struggled to keep it down. Sirius held him close as he gagged, and then pressed a kiss to his forehead when he went still.

“Good boy. Don’t say anything, not until you’ve said the spell, or it won’t work. Here,” he said, holding out a page from a spell book. “Can you read this?”

Harry nodded and took the parchment, silently reading it over a few times. He held out his wand to Sirius and raised a questioning eyebrow.

“No, you don’t need your wand. Just read it aloud.”

Harry nodded and put it away, then got to his feet and took a deep breath.

“Protegam eum fideliter ipsorum obitu vel donec. Haec enim omnia tuta reliquero. Et oculos serena verum est nisi ad gratum meum,” Harry recited, his voice clear and steady, eyes fixed on the words.

The house flickered, glowing blue, then orange, then red, and finally fading out, disappearing from everyone’s view but Harry’s.

“Did it work?” Harry asked.

“Yes, pup, it did,” Remus promised. “You can still see it because you’re the Keeper. But none of us can.”

Remus held out the paper and quill Ron had brought and Harry leaned on Sirius’ back, writing 12 Grimmauld Place, London in his spikey uneven handwriting. It had always looked like chicken scratch, and he doubted it would ever improve. Sirius had beautiful penmanship, and Remus. Severus’ was pretty nice when he wanted it to be. Solarin’s, now that was a work of art. Completely beautiful and worthy of hanging on a wall in some art gallery. Nixie’s too.

“Now what?” Harry asked.

“Now you show it to who you want in the enchantment, the people you want to be able to get in to the house, and then burn this when you’re done,” Severus said, carrying Miri over and bouncing her.

“What about the little ones?”

“Once their mothers know the address, they’ll be pulled in too. That covers under elevens. Once they reach Hogwarts-age, it’s their own responsibility to be sworn in.”

Harry nodded and passed the paper to Sirius, who read it and watched as the house appeared before him. Then Remus, and then Severus. The family cycled through, each reading it and then returning inside. Molly was taken to one side by Bill once he’d looked.

Once all of them were sworn in, Arthur took Molly to the road and hailed a cab.

“Arthur, please,” she begged. “Please, let me stay.”

“I can’t, Molly,” he said. “I’m sorry, but I can’t. I have to side with our children, they’re my children, I can’t turn my backs on them, not even for you. Our children have always come first, always. And I won’t change that now. They say you cannot stay, and I must respect that.”

“Where will I go?” she whimpered.

“Muriel’s maybe? I don’t know. You’re strong, Molly, you’ll find somewhere.” He handed her a bag of gold. “Go to the Leaky for tonight, and figure it all out in the morning.”

“I wasn’t trying to hurt Harry, I swear I wasn’t. Albus told me it was the right thing, Arthur. And he’s Albus! Why would I question it?”

“I can’t talk about this right now,” Arthur said. “I…I just can’t. Just go, Molly.”

“Arthur…”

“Go.”

He stepped back and slammed the door, looking away as the cab drove off, wondering if his family could ever be put back together.

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Harry woke the next morning to the glaring front page headline. He got Miri dressed and made his way down to breakfast where the paper was waiting.

“How did this happen?” Bill asked, motioning to the Daily Prophet. “I don’t understand how this spread so fast.”

“Who told someone?” Charlie pressed.

“I told Minerva,” Severus said. “After lunch, I sent her an owl.”

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE ARRESTED UNDER SUSPICION OF CHILD ABUSE

Headlines didn’t get much more shocking than that. The picture showed Auror’s dragging Albus away in enchanted handcuffs.

Mad-Eye’s patronus appeared through the wall and looked at them before speaking in his voice.

“I’m in the playground. Someone let me in.”

At Harry’s nod, Severus took the piece of paper Harry had written and made his way out. Mad-Eye was waiting.

“Who’s side are you on?” Severus asked without preamble. “Do you side with Albus?”

“I didn’t know there were sides,” Moody said. “Is it true, what they’re saying about Dumbledore? Has he been abusing children?”

“He knew Harry was being abused and did nothing. If you side with him, then I’m sorry, but you and I will have a problem.”

Moody sank down onto a bench, burying his face in his hands.

“You didn’t know,” Severus summarised, taking a seat.

“None of it. He let Harry be abused?”

“He had full knowledge and did nothing. Molly was aware and chose to allow it to continue on his say so. There was a disagreement yesterday. Molly has had to leave.”

“Merlin and Morgana,” he groaned. “How did this happen? Why would he do this? Harry is the sweetest little wizard, why would he let someone hurt him?”

“So he could be manipulated into fighting the Dark Lord and die. Mad-Eye, I don’t think he meant for Harry to survive. Think about it. If Harry had died, then Albus could use his memory as a strengthening point for his power base. He would have been unchallenged for complete control of the Wizarding world, having everything exactly the way he wanted it. He doesn’t need to be Minister, not if he has that much influence.”

“But Harry didn’t die.”

“Which makes him a problem. If he thought it was perfectly acceptable for a child to be abused his whole life, perfectly acceptable to leave him with people who would do that, what could he do now Harry knows the truth?”

“So you told Minerva what you know,” Moody said. “I’ll be honest, I think Albus was thankful we turned up. I think she might have skinned him to make a rug if we hadn’t.”

“Are you leading the investigation?”

“No, it’s going to be overseen by wizards from Canada and Australia, those linked to our government but separate, so they can be impartial. Social Wizarding Care, the new department being set up? They’re leading the actual evidence gathering, and they’ll probably want to talk to Harry, maybe some others in your family.”

“That comes later. For now,” he said, holding out the paper to Moody.

Moody read it and the two of them made their way inside, where Moody told them all what had happened with Dumbledore.

Minerva McGonagall had received Severus’ owl as dinner was starting in the Great Hall. She had travelled to Little Whinging and made some discreet enquiries, and then looked through Madam Pomfrey’s medical notes.

All the things Pomfrey had seen over the years, all the evidence she’d found, it was all enough for Minerva to lose her temper completely. She sent for the Auror’s and then went after Dumbledore herself. Apparently, when they had arrived, Dumbledore had been a cowering shaking wreck, begging them to rescue him from the furious witch. He’d been so stunned by her sudden anger, he hadn’t had the chance to pick up his wand.

Madame Pomfrey was also being investigated by the Wizarding Medical Council. If she could be so quick to ignore signs of sustained abuse and neglect in Harry, how many others had she pushed aside? How many children and young adults had been let down by people they were supposed to be able to trust?

Hogwarts had been put into emergency special measures. Every teacher and class was being investigated, the House Elves, the food, even down to the very fabric of the castle, all of it was being examined and changed to improve things.

The Ministry was tired of being branded failures, Fudge was sick of being called incompetent. The whole system of government was being assessed and altered, everything from sweet shops to the judicial system was now under review.

The overhaul of Wizarding Britain was being overseen by a panel of five, three witches and two wizards, from Canada, France, Spain, Australia and Japan. Those five would guide the changes and ensure mass panic didn’t break out among the public. It would take time to implement the changes, to truly make things better, but things were already changing.

Harry was no longer at the mercy of any wizard that wanted to own him. Magical hermaphrodites now had the same rights as any other wizard, and charges of rape, assault, abuse of a minor and false imprisonment had been added to the list of charges against Lucius. Harry was now free to go and do what he wanted.

The family decided to leave the Fidelius Charm in place. Harry was still the most famous wizard in the world, he still needed privacy from the masses and the press, so having their home hidden was seen as a necessity.

Harry ignored it all, letting it all wash over him. Miri was especially clingy that morning, and he didn’t want her to pick up on how he was really feeling. He cut up her pancakes and fruit, letting her push pieces into his mouth and feeding her bits from his.

“Let’s talk about this somewhere else or another time,” Charlie said, glancing at Harry.

“Good idea,” Remus said, forcedly cheerful. “What are everyone’s plans for the day?”

“I want to go out,” Harry said.

“Are you sure, love?” Severus questioned gently, pouring himself more coffee. He didn’t react outwardly in any kind of way, just waited for Harry to explain.

“Yes. I want to go get Miri a bed.”

“Ah, I see.”

Severus took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. He couldn’t keep Harry a prisoner, and he didn’t want to either. Harry was a grown man, perfectly able to make his own choices. Severus wouldn’t be much of a husband if he didn’t give Harry autonomy with his own decisions.

Didn’t mean his heart didn’t leap into his throat at the prospect of Harry going out.

“A bed?” Sirius asked. “Does she need one? She’s still really little.”

“She can get out of the cot by herself,” Harry pointed out. “She’s ready for a big girl bed. And then Daven can use the cot. It’s a family heirloom.”

“We have some toddler beds in the attic,” Remus said.

“I looked, but I don’t like those,” Harry said. “They’re all dark wood and it would look weird in her room. It’s all light and airy in there. A dark wood bed would look strange.”

“Where are you thinking of?” Bill asked, feeding Daven.

“When I was a kid, Aunt Petunia got Dudley a desk from a place called IKEA. It was a really nice desk. And it was all in pieces. I put it together. It was fun, like a jigsaw.”

“I’m sure we can find an IKEA,” Severus said, skirting over the fact that Petunia thought it was appropriate for a child to put together furniture. Harry had enjoyed it, he would focus on that and not how much he wanted to smack Petunia. “Sirius, may we borrow the car?”

“You know how to drive?”

“It’s been a while but my licence is still valid.”

Sirius waved his wand and summoned the car keys from their hook and chucked them across to Severus. “Try not to break my car.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

“There’s an internet café round the corner,” Solarin said. “Want me to go, find where an IKEA is?”

“If you would?”

Solarin helped Dorian put on his shoes and the two of them disappeared. Harry picked up Miri, who was now playing with her breakfast more than eating, and left the room to get ready to go out.

“How is he, really?” Remus asked Severus.

“Confused and hurt,” he said honestly, toying with a stray grape Miri had launched onto the table. “Remus, he’s too young to have been betrayed and abused by so many people. It’s a wonder he trusts at all anymore.”

“He isn’t questioning us, is he?” Charlie asked. “Severus, we would never-”

“No, I know,” he assured, holding up a hand. “He doesn’t mistrust any of you, he knows who he can trust. He’s just trying to process being betrayed by another parental figure. Well, actually, it’s two, Molly and Albus. It’s a hard blow. I’m not quite sure what’s going through his head at the moment, but I know he’s happy here, with those he considers family. If he didn’t trust you, you wouldn’t be here.”

“Harry only let those he trusts into the house,” George pointed out. “We’re sitting in his kitchen, he trusts us.”

Solarin returned with Dorian hauling a carrier bag of chocolate and candy.

“Look, Daddy,” Dorian said, holding up his bag of goodies. “Mummy bought them for everyone.”

“Wow. Which one do you want?”

“This one!” he announced, holding up a lolly pop like an Olympic baton.

“Good choice, buddy. Go on, go let everyone else choose theirs.”

“Here,” Solarin said, handing Severus a printout. “This is the closest one, about an hour from here. Well, an hour from the café. Had a peek at their website while Dor was picking goodies. Some very nice stuff. I think you’ll probably end up with more than just a bed for Miri.”

“I shall warn my bank balance. Sol, you know I love you,” Severus began.

“What do you want?”

“There’s a car seat that came with the pram. Any chance you know how it goes in the car?”

She giggled and patted his shoulder before leaving the room again to go fit it for him.

“We’re ready,” Harry said. Miri was in a pretty pair of dungarees and little Doc Martens boots in pink.

Miri was obsessed with pink, she was like a moth to a flame when it came to anything pink. Pastel pink, fuchsia, neon, she loved them all. And she loved glitter and sequins. Anything girly and she wanted it immediately. She still loved trucks and mud and other traditionally male things, and Harry and Severus were happy for her to play with what she wanted so long as she didn’t get hurt. But she would always gravitate to pretty girly things. Harry and Severus were highly amused, especially when she dressed Snuffles in her pink play clothes and jewellery. He looked absolutely stunning.

“Go soppin’!” Miri declared. “Daddy, shoes!”

“I see, very pretty shoes, baby.”

“No, Daddy have shoes!”

“Ah. Alright, hold on.” He summoned his boots and pulled them on.

They did coats and packing a nappy bag and final reassurances that they’d be fine. It was the Muggle world, and they hadn’t planned this in advance, they hadn’t even been to an IKEA before, so there was pretty much no chance Lucius would find them. Severus was nervous, but strangely looking forward to the outing. Miri was so excited she was projecting it out to everyone, making them smile at her.

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The drive was fairly pleasant, Harry sitting in the back with Miri and talking to her, telling her how she couldn’t use her magic on the people they would see while out. She understood fairly well, taking it in. She’d slip, she was only a year old, she wasn’t perfect at controlling herself yet, but it was enough she would try. Muggles wouldn’t truly understand the sheer joy she was projecting anyway, but it was a good idea to start teaching her now.

IKEA was huge, absolutely monumental. A huge blue box in the middle of motorways.

Severus found a parking spot and Miri was happy enough to hold Harry’s hand as they entered. The escalator fascinated her, and she wanted to ride it again once they’d reached the top, but Severus managed to distract her with a display of fake flowers in crates.

There were room mock ups, and Harry loved exploring all the cupboards and drawers, finding the clever storage. Severus kept hold of the list, noting down what Harry really took a shine to, and feeling oddly serene. It was fun, watching his lover enjoy this simple thing.

They found the section of showroom filled with sofas and Harry shot him a look, one that screamed pure seduction. Heat flashed through his belly and he pushed it down, smiling as Harry set to testing them out, finding one he liked for their room.

Miri found the pinkest one and climbed on it, giggling to herself.

The kitchens were nice, and Severus knew Harry was gathering ideas for perhaps living separately from his parents at some point. Severus knew Harry was happy with Sirius and Remus, but he’d like for them to get their own place someday. It was good for him to be looking forwards, be making plans, even if they weren’t solid.

The kitchen department also allowed Harry to find a whole load of storage options for his growing collection of crafting materials. Rails to mount on the walls and different things to hang from them; trolleys and carts; drawer organisers. Severus ended up carrying a big yellow bag of things Harry picked out. Severus himself picked out a fair amount, envisioning where he’d put it all in his lab.

It took a very long time for Harry to work through the desk selections. Severus had murmured in his ear that he could have one, just for him, just for his crafting. Harry had lit up like a Christmas tree and wandered in and out of them, testing drawers and peering in cupboards, assessing height and sturdiness. Severus offered his own opinions, but was far less picky when he picked his own desk for paperwork. A simple fold away number, something he could close and shut his papers away. That it was black didn’t hurt either.

Harry finally picked one called Hemnes, which was white and had a plethora of shelves and drawers. It would be plenty of storage for the time being. Of course, if he kept on crafting and his collection of tools and materials grew, they would have to rethink, perhaps get a drawer unit for him.

Miri picked out her own desk, a pink and white number that would grow with her. Her bedroom was about to undergo a whole load of changes.

Chairs completed that section, and then they moved on, breaking briefly to change Miri.

Wardrobes and dressers weren’t really on their radar, they didn’t need them, nor did they need adult beds. But they followed the arrows and soon found the toddler bed display.

They started by picking a bedframe. Miri was happy enough to test them all, and play in the bedroom mock ups. They settled on a white wooden frame, with a nice firm mattress. They picked out bedding in pink, and a canopy shaped like a leaf. She already had a wardrobe and dresser, but there were other things they liked.

A whole assortment of plastic drawers in wooden frames to go in the playroom, some storage for Miri’s bedroom, cushions shaped like suns and clouds and basket balls, a little table and chairs, a picnic table in kid size for the garden, play tents, a rug with roads on it, boxes and bags and a shelf shaped like a dolls house. More food and utensils and things for the play kitchen, a bed for dolls, stuffed toys shaped like broccoli and carrots, art supplies, jigsaws. They pretty much picked up one of every toy IKEA stocked.

They finished up their exploration of the showroom floor with a selection of kids plates and cutlery, and then decided to stop for lunch before they did the warehouse floor.

They all had the meatballs and mash with lingonberry sauce and Miri was happy to sit at the table and watch people go by while she ate. She’d done an awful lot of walking and climbing and exploring. She’d probably fall asleep in the car on the way home.

“Are you sure we’re not spoiling her too much?” Harry worried.

“I’m sure we probably are, but why should we not? We have the money, and she’ll share almost all of it with her cousins. If she were the only child in the house I would feel differently, but she’s not,” Severus promised. “The toys will all go in the playroom, save for a few special ones. It’s not spoiling if it’s going to benefit all the children.”

“That’s a good point.”

For the warehouse floor, they put Miri in the seat of the trolley, and she babbled at them as they wandered around the absolute forest of things for sale. They picked up baking accessories for Sol, and lots more storage for everyone. Things for their bathroom, and other things for their bedroom. Random items they thought might come in handy somewhere in the house.

Then they found the warehouse proper. Row upon row of shelves reaching up to the ceiling, piled with neat organised boxes of flat-pack furniture. Severus led their expedition to find their items, and a lot of sneaky spells were used to get the various boxes. Their second trolley was stacked high with them, and Harry had great fun manoeuvring it to the checkout line, giggling as he struggled to move it.

The total was hidden by Severus, who paid for it all with his Gringotts card. The woman behind the register gave herself away as a witch when she called him Professor. A quick trip around the food section and some drinks from the bistro and then they were back to the car, Severus performing some weird jigsaw to get it all to fit. A few shrinking spells ensured it all went in.

Miri was asleep before they even got two minutes down the road, her little fists gripping at her milkshake. Harry plucked it out of her grasp and clambered into the front passenger seat.

“How was the day?” Severus asked, indicating he was turning right.

“I liked it. But I’m shattered. Can we put it all together tomorrow?”

“Absolutely. First thing I need is taking off my shoes and perhaps a nap.”

“A nap sounds amazing.”

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After breakfast, Bill and Charlie had taken the kids to the garden to play, and Ron and Harry had set upon the first flat pack.

“This is insane!” Ron complained, scowling at the instructions. “These make no sense.”

“Why, because they’re not in Latin?” Harry grinned.

“No, because only a mad sorcerer can understand them.”

“Oh, hush,” Hermione soothed, noting down something in her notebook. “You want difficult? You can translate this bloody book.”

She had the Augur book splayed open on the footstool, and several dictionaries scattered around her. Considering how long she’d been working on it, she probably should have been more than ten pages in.

“Are you getting anywhere?” Harry asked, sorting through his pile of screws and selecting the ones he needed for that section of bed frame.

“I’m not even through the introduction,” she complained. “So far I’ve counted at least 400 human languages, some Mermish, some Gobbledegook, and something that looks like Pixie. There are over a thousand different handwritings, decades of different paper types and ages. I think it’s something like a diary, each Augur adding something.”

“Will it give Sol the answers she wants?”

“I hope so. Listen to this. ‘The phenomenon of the Augur is older than the world of man, and more precious than the soul, though the Trickster inhabits every Augur, for good or ill.’ That’s in the introduction, if you can believe it.”

“Doesn’t sound particularly comforting. Who’s the Trickster?”

“I think they mean Loki, the Norse god of mischief. Which would fit with Sol, she loves playing pranks, tricking people. For good or ill, that suggests that an Augur isn’t inherently one or the other, good or bad. So the assumption that being an Augur makes Sol something evil is complete rot.”

“I could have told you that.”

“Ah ha! I got it! This piece!” Ron cried, holding said piece up like a prize. “It made no sense because I was sitting on a piece.”

“Glad to see you’ve figured it out,” Hermione praised.

“Yup. So you think Sol’s just like the rest of us, a human who screws up and burns dinner?”

“I think it’s more, but I do think she’s wrong in thinking she’s evil.”

“She’s not evil,” Harry said quietly. “She’s amazing. She’s not perfect, no one is, but she’s not evil. She had evil things done to her, but that reflects on the people who did those things, not her.”

“Oh, you bloody buggering thing!” Ron roared, clutching his hand.

“What did you do?” Harry asked.

“It slipped. No blood, thankfully. Harry, why couldn’t you just charm one of the beds in the attic white? Why did you get this flat pack hell?”

“I like flat packs,” he pointed out. “Look, just let me do it and hold up things when I need you to.”

“Works for me.”

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Once the furniture was put together, they left Harry in Miri’s room, and he happily set to rearranging things.

He hung her mobile above her bed, added her stuffed dragon. He arranged her books on the new bookshelf, and her crayons and paper and colouring books on her new desk. He fluffed up the new rug and hung the new curtains.

There was even a pair of little padded dolls beds for Smoo and Cauldron.

Severus came and found him when he ignored the call for dinner.

“Talk to me, Harry,” he said gently, hugging him from behind where he sat on Miri’s new bed.

“It’s just a lot, you know? Molly and Albus, the exams coming up…”

“And?”

“The law,” he whispered.

“Ah.”

“I’ve lived with it for so long now, knowing I belonged to you, that belonging kept me safe. The fear of what would happen to me if I wasn’t yours. And now…”

“It’s a big change,” he agreed. “Having sudden freedom, it’s a big thing. But nothing will change between us. I still love you just as much as I did yesterday, and the day before, and all the way back. I love you, all of you, just the way you are. So the law has changed, which is a good thing. You’re no longer at risk from every wizard who wants to use you. That is the only change.”

“Okay, so maybe it’s a good thing,” he allowed. “But I don’t feel so good.”

“I know,” he soothed, nuzzling at his neck. “Harry, no one is expecting you to be okay with any of this. Being betrayed by people you trust is an awful thing. I’d be worried if you were perfectly okay with everything that’s gone on.”

“I’m not angry at Molly,” Harry said. “I’m sad about what she did, but I’m not angry about it. She trusted him, just like everyone else did. I still don’t want her here, but I can see how it happened. I’m just…I can’t get my head around all the stuff that happened because of him. It doesn’t make sense that he was able to manipulate so many people.”

“It is mind boggling. So much trust in one man. Harry, I want to be sure you know that none of what happened to you, none of it, was your fault. You’ve done nothing wrong.”

“Haven’t I?” he whispered.

“Oh, Harry, no. Not a single thing. You were a child, how could it have been your fault? You were a child, and you were failed by the adults who were responsible for your care. It was not your decision to go to the Dursley’s. Not you who sent Sirius to prison without trial. Not you who whispered in Molly’s ear. And it certainly wasn’t you who decided locking you up in a room for five months and brutalising you was an acceptable course of action. You have done nothing wrong, and I won’t have you blaming yourself for it.”

“How do I handle all of this?” Harry asked, looking at him. “How do I make it make sense?”

“Time,” Severus said gently. “You give yourself some time, let yourself process it. Stop thinking that you must process it all immediately.”

“Isn’t there a spell or something?”

Severus laughed and kissed him. “I’m afraid not, love. Yes, that would be nice, wouldn’t it? One spell and all things are in order. But no such magical method of therapy exists. On the other hand, there is real therapy.”

“No,” Harry said immediately.

“Hold on, hear me out. It’s nothing scary. You simply go and talk to someone. Sit in a nice comfy chair, talk through things, and they help you process it and come to terms with it.”

“How do I even begin to talk through everything? Lucius, the Dursley’s, Voldemort. Dumbledore. I don’t even know how to put it into words.”

“Alright, perhaps talking to a Mind Healer or a Therapist wouldn’t be helpful. But there may be things we can do at home. Perhaps you could try writing it down in your journal. Put it down on paper, get it out of your head so it’s laid out clearly, so you can make sense of it that way. Or maybe some meditation exercises. Yoga, I’ve heard that can be helpful for stress and emotional turmoil. We can do some research, ask Sam if he knows some things that might help. Maybe there is a potion you can take for anxiety, something like your calming draught. We’ll do some reading, try some things.”

Harry hummed out a sigh, snuggling back into him.

“I love you, Severus. I love you so much. You’re an amazing husband.”

“Thank you. I do try.”

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Harry was careful to keep Miri’s bedtime routine the same.

He took her up for her bath and let her play, carefully washing her curls and flicking her ducks to make them skim across the surface of the water and make her giggle. He used the same camomile bubbles he always used, let her play for as long as he usually did. He didn’t wash her hair every night, but they’d had pie and mash for dinner and her mash had migrated.

He levered her out and stood her on the bathmat so he could wrap her in her towel and then she waddled off to her room while he emptied the tub, putting her toys into the mesh bag and bottles back where they belonged. Then he followed her.

Miri was still swaddled in her towel but had freed one arm so she could pull out a nappy and the sleepwear she wanted. Cauldron carefully watched her toddle back and forth, laying her choices on the rocking chair.

“There’s my squeaky clean girl,” Harry cooed as he swooped her up; she squealed with laughter. He carried her as he closed her curtains and pulled back her duvet, turned on her glowing crystal. It projected colours and patterns on the walls and ceiling, and she had slept with it every night since she was three weeks old. It had even gone on holiday with them. He settled himself in the rocking chair and sung nursery rhymes as he dried her, rubbing her curls and careful with her tiny toes.

She happily laid down on the ottoman so he could fasten her nappy around her hips and then slowly wriggled into her pyjamas herself. Harry had to help her with which limb went where, but other than that she liked to do it herself.

Bedtime was now the only time she nursed from Harry, and it was only a comfort. Once she was dressed, Harry pulled off his shirt and she climbed into his lap, latching on and cuddling close, her little hand star-fished against his heart. While she nursed, Harry told her a story. That night it was the Three Bears. It also gave her hair a chance to dry.

Once the story was finished and she was sleepy, he got her to detach and carried her over to bed.

“Caya, a bed!” she said sleepily as he laid her down.

“That’s right. This is Miri’s big girl bed. Come on, baby, cuddle in,” he said, tucking her dragon into her arms and covering her over. “That’s my good girl. I love you, baby. As high as the sky and as deep as the sea and still I love you more.”

She patted his hair as he kissed her little cheek and then closed her eyes as he stood. He and Severus liked to get her to settle herself to sleep, so she was always awake when they left the room, but she was only a few minutes from dreams.

Severus was waiting for him in their bedroom, curled on their new sofa with a book.

“She down?”

“Yes. I think she’ll be okay,” Harry said, stripping to his boxers and straddling Severus’ lap. Severus quickly put the book aside and kissed him.

“I swear, you leave more t-shirts in her room than she does.”

“I keep forgetting them after nursing. She’s all cuddly and sleepy. Honestly, is there any better moment than bedtime?”

“Hmmm. Morning cuddles?”

“Those are pretty good too.”

“Bath time, you both enjoy that if the splashy mess is anything to go by.”

“The mermaid found treasure tonight,” Harry said with a grin. “Apparently the bar of soap was a chest of jewels.”

“Goodness, we certainly underpaid for it then.”

“I have a lot of favourite moments with her. She’s so little and cuddly and happy.”

“And the tantrum she threw when there were no more cookies left?”

“Okay, that was less fun. But she got over it.”

“Yes, and I was very impressed, love. You didn’t give in, you didn’t pander to her, just let her get it all out of her system and then cuddles. I was highly impressed by your handling of it.”

“That was tough. She’s never done that before.”

“Part of growing up. She’s getting older, and with that comes learning about the world around her. One of those lessons is what behaviour will and won’t be tolerated by her parents.”

“Think it sunk in?”

“I very much hope so. Listening to her scream was not my favourite activity.”

“Speaking of not favourite things,” Harry said.

“I’m not sure that was even a sentence yet I understood you perfectly. Should I be worried?”

“Oi! Cheeky beggar!” Harry giggled as Severus grinned, ducking in to kiss him. “Not all of us speak like we’re out of some Dickens novel, you know.”

“Very well, it was just a passing comment. You were saying, ‘not favourite things’?”

“The exams.”

“Ah, yes, I did say we’d talk about the arrangements after bedtime, didn’t I? Well, I spoke to Minerva, and she’s happy for us to use the Floo now Miri is old enough. She just needs to be covered in a blanket to protect against the soot. Minerva is having our rooms prepared. Miri and I will come with you, and Remus and Sirius will accompany Nixie.”

“Just the six of us?”

“Yes, that’s it. Solarin will be arriving daily, Minerva wants her to help invigilate the exams, guard against cheating and such, but she will come home each night for the children. Ron and Hermione are going to be leaving the twins with Bill and Solarin and the others while they sit the exams. We’ll be in the castle for the full two weeks while the tests are running, and then we shall come home.”

“And you’re sure I’m ready to take them?”

“Absolutely positive, love. You can create the needed potions, perform the required spells. You know what I suspect will be on the written papers. As far as I can tell, you’re ready.”

“As far as you can tell? That doesn’t sound comforting.”

“I don’t know what’s on the papers, so I can’t be absolutely certain, but drawing on my experiences, I’m fairly sure of what you’ll be facing. Don’t worry, love. You’ll do absolutely fine.”

“And if I fail them all?”

“If, in the unlikely event, you fail every single test, as long as you did your very best then that shall be enough for me. But, you can always resit them later if you want to.”

“Now that’s comforting.”

Severus smiled and held Harry close, kissing him and standing, carrying him to bed. He set Harry down and left him to get settled while he checked on Miri. She was sound asleep, her thumb in her mouth. He didn’t know why they’d been apprehensive about transitioning her out of the crib. She’d switched from her bassinet to her crib without a problem. Her big girl bed seemed to be the same. He settled the duvet more securely around her, tucking in a little foot, and collected Harry’s t-shirt from where he’d left it. He dumped it in the hamper on his way to the toilet and then he joined his lover, who curled into him the moment he was settled.

Harry clung to him, snuggling in as he drifted off, and Severus wished he wouldn’t worry so much. He didn’t care if Harry completely bombed every single question. Life was more than test scores. Harry’s worth was not defined by how well he did on his N.E.W.T.’s. He was worth far more than any number.

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The family had decided to turn the attic into an owlery. Severus needed more than just his owl for deliveries, as did Fred and George. Remus, Sirius, and Solarin all needed regular owl access to send off book chapters.

Hedwig and Severus’ own black Midnight were struggling to keep up with the demand, and Solarin had retired Kitty. She’d found an owl sanctuary just outside of Birmingham where the black bird could live out the rest of her days in luxury. All the mice and treats she could eat, all the perches she could want.

They first sorted through all the things stored in the attic and over a period of four days managed to sort everything. They had a lot of stuff straight for the rubbish, old furniture and toys that were broken or too worn to be worth saving, clothes no longer in style, papers and books and other things accumulated by a family over the centuries.

Another pile was set aside to be donated or sold. Rare old books, those could go to Hogwarts or a buyer in Knockturn Alley, depending on the subject matter. Some of the dark texts were obviously too dark to be allowed to leave the house and were burnt instead, but quite a few of the dark history texts were first editions and would fetch a pretty price. There was a rather large collection of disturbing erotica which would be sold to one particular shopkeeper in the Alley, a man who had the most peculiar clients. It wasn’t dangerous, just disgusting.

They set aside a pile of things that would go straight to the Ministry. Dark objects and prohibited items that needed to be disposed of in a particular way. Mad-Eye and Tonks took those things away in heavy lined boxes, to be taken care of and destroyed in the proper manner.

Once the space was cleared, they gave it a good cleaning to get rid of the dust, and then Remus went off and bought some lengths of timber. They spent two days sawing and hammering to build a network of perches and nesting boxes. Finally they removed the windows and placed charms so the house would still be weatherproof.

The floor was spread with a layer of fresh hay, the water bowls filled and the food dishes stocked. Charms and enchantments were set to keep it relatively clean though they would need to change the hay once a week, and the water and food once a day.

Finally it was off to Diagon Alley, ready to pick out their own fleet of feathered postmen.

Severus volunteered for the task. He went with a firm plan of what they needed and what they didn’t. No owls that were too small to carry anything of importance, like Pig. He was too small for any deliveries other than thin single-sheet letters, local deliveries only. Occasionally he could do a longer journey, perhaps to Hogwarts, but not too often. He was only little after all.

They also avoided anything too flashy or enormous. They had to be mindful of Muggles, so they couldn’t draw too much attention to themselves.

The family specified that only owls that were friendly would be suitable. No one needed owls who wanted to kill each other. They would all roost in the attic, so they all needed to get along. They also made the decision to purchase only female owls where possible. This would help keep the numbers fairly even, without little baby owls filling the roost and upsetting the nested owls.

And female owls were usually more tolerant than males of small witches and wizards.

Eeylops Owl Emporium in Diagon Alley were stunned to suddenly have customers wanting dozens of owls. They got the usual rush at the beginning of the school year of course, but nothing like what Severus and the others wanted.

“How many?” the sales witch asked, wide eyed.

“At least forty mid to large size female owls, all with good temperament,” Severus repeated.

“Well. Uh. Just a moment.”

She scurried through the store and disappeared out the back, returning with a wizard who had to be her manager.

“I hear you need a large quantity of female owls,” he said.

“Yes,” Severus said. “As I told your colleague, we require at least forty mid to large sized female owls, all with good temperament.”

“Right, let’s see then.”

He snagged a large ledger and consulted it as he walked up and down the aisles, making a list on a spare piece of parchment of which cages held the owls he could offer. He stuck to a palette of blacks and browns, bypassing all the snowy or pale birds. He skipped right over the small owls, and they chirruped in offence.

“Oh, hush,” he scolded. “You’re not what he needs, so stop it. Right then. I have twenty two I can offer, all the others are too small or colourful for what you want. The Post Office in Carkitt Market might have some to sell, and the Magical Menagerie might have some. Starling’s down the Alley might have some. Of course, if you can wait a few days, I can order the rest of the owls you need myself.”

“I shall take the twenty two and wait for you to order the other eighteen. When should they be here?” Severus asked as the witch began bringing up cages for him.

“End of next week I should have all eighteen. Do you want to pay for all forty now or just these ones?”

“Just these today, and I’ll pay the rest when I come for the other birds.”

Severus pulled out his money pouch. Once he’d paid he took the large travel cage and wheeled it out into the Alley. It took some careful manoeuvring to get it down the cobbles to the Leakey Cauldron, and covering it over so he could Floo home with it was a pain in the neck.

But eventually he managed to emerge from the fireplace and the family helped him carry them up to their new roost.

The training manual they had gotten from the Ministry instructed them that they had to keep them contained in the new owlery for 48 hours and then they could be allowed out to hunt. Once they’d been in their new home for a week, the owls could be used to deliver post.

When the other eighteen arrived, they would be shown by the first twenty two what was expected, but the first twenty two would need to be taught by their humans.

As each one was taken from the travel cage, they were given a little metal ring for their ankle to mark where they came from, so if they got lost or hurt the family could be contacted.

Keeping so many owls was expensive, but in the long run it would save them a fortune in post office fees. Hedwig and Midnight chirruped in question as so many birds were brought into their home and Harry smiled at them as he approached the stand in the kitchen where they perched.

“Easy, Hedwig; good boy, Midnight,” he soothed, stroking their soft chest feathers, getting tugs of his hair. “They’re here to help us. But you’re my pretty ones. They won’t take your places, I promise. Just means you won’t have to do all the heavy flying anymore, that’s all.”

“He’s pissed off,” Ron complained, joining him with Pig in his fist, squawking noisily in complaint.

“Poor Pig,” Harry lamented as the little bird joined his two larger companions. “Don’t worry, my little feather ball. They’re just here to help. We still love you the most.”

All three birds puffed up in pride and settled, grooming each other, beaks tugging at Harry and Ron’s hair in affection.

“Maybe you should be up there getting those birds settled,” Ron suggested.

“No, Hedwig needs me here. They’ll settle soon enough. These three are pets, those ones are here to work, there’s a difference.”

“Good point. Did you hear Bill and Sol arguing last night?”

“I did but I couldn’t make out what they were fighting about.”

“Mum. Sol wants to take Dorian and Daven to see her, Bill disagrees.”

“Oh.” Harry focussed on smoothing Hedwig’s feathers.

“It’s not your fault,” Ron said firmly, squeezing his shoulder. “It’s hers. What did she think we would do when we found out what she’d done? Did she think we would just shrug and say it was no big deal? She let him turn a blind eye to you being abused. She needs to deal with the consequences.”

“I just don’t want there to be arguments because of it.”

“Oh, you know those two. They’d fight over the last cookie. I swear, it’s like foreplay for them,” he said with a shudder. “Honestly, how many times can one pair have sex?” he whispered. “They’re insatiable!”

“It’s nice, that they’re in love,” Harry giggled, blushing.

“Sure, love is great, but do they have to be so damn public with it?”

“Shush,” he whispered with a laugh.

“What are you two giggling about?” Severus asked, coming up behind them silently and making them jump.

“Don’t do that!” Ron ordered, rubbing his chest. “It’s creepy and sneaky and too close to potions class.”

“My apologies,” Severus grinned.

“We were talking about Bill and Solarin,” Harry said. “They’re arguing. Again.”

“Ah, yes. I did hear a little of this argument. I can see both sides but I’m not sure where I fall on it.”

“Daddy!”

“Duty calls,” Ron said with a grin before he moved away to see to Joseph.

“Harry,” Severus said carefully. “How do you feel about-”

“No,” Harry demanded. “I’m not passing judgement. They’re Sol’s kids, she gets the choice of where they go, her and Bill. If she wants to take them to see their grandma, then that’s between her and Bill. I’m not giving any opinion on what other people do with their children.”

Severus smiled and cuddled him, pressing a kiss to his neck. “If only other people felt the same. Wouldn’t it be nice if people stopped judging each other?”

“It’ll never happen. The Prophet would go out of business. And what would all those bitchy witches do all day if they couldn’t judge?”

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Harry couldn’t revise any more. If he tried to cram any more spells or potions or charms or wand movements into his head, his brain would start dribbling out of his nose.

It was Saturday, the last day before they travelled to Hogwarts for their exams, which would start on Monday. He’d done all the prep he could do. If he didn’t know it by now, he never would.

Hermione was frantic, as usual, and even Ron was a little more frazzled that he usually was when it came to exams. Harry had no doubt that Hermione would sail through and make them all look incredibly stupid, and Ron would achieve respectable marks in all he wanted to.

But he knew that if he didn’t take a break, he would crash and burn before he was even halfway through his first paper.

Miri was playing happily, reading to Remus, and had made it clear she didn’t want him hovering. Severus was in his lab, brewing something incredibly intricate. Ron and Hermione were off being ‘married’, and Sirius had disappeared off somewhere. Nixie and Charlie were doing a jigsaw. Everyone was busy doing something.

Harry found himself at a loss. Potter the cat followed him into his bedroom and meowed up at him.

“What? You want to do something?”

“Meow.”

“Okay. My cat wants to do something. Right, Potter, what do you want to do?”

The cat chirruped at him and slinked across the room to the shelves where he kept various boxes. Some jigsaws, some board games, some school supplies. Potter padded his furry self over and used a paw to push at a box until Harry followed and pulled it out.

“Snakes and Ladders? You want to play?”

“Meow.”

“Okay.”

He set up the board on the carpet and held out the playing pieces, Potter batting at them until the yellow one fell to the floor. Harry set it up and the blue one for himself, and then set the die in its shaker. It was a plastic dome that when pressed would snap and shake the little cube without the risk of it rolling under a piece of furniture.

Potter purred as he pressed the dome with a paw and then pushed at his yellow cone until it had moved the three places.

Harry couldn’t quite believe he was playing a board game with a cat, but Potter was not like other cats. They were fairly certain he was a Kneazle, or at least half. Arthur was going to take him to a wizarding vet while they were off doing the exams. He was highly intelligent, and an excellent companion, but he was pure white, which was not the norm for a Kneazle, nor did he have the overly large ears.

He and Crookshanks had become fast friends, the two of them happy to groom each other and curl up together. They often took little Cauldron with them to find a warm spot and cuddle, and they were all happy to eat out of each other’s bowls.

Harry took his turn, and Potter seemed pleased to be playing.

“I keep wondering about you,” Harry murmured as Potter took a turn. “If you were there that night, where you hid when he came. Did you even realise what had happened? I hate to think of you waiting for us to come and get you.”

Potter let out a chirp and padded across to climb into Harry’s lap. He balanced on his hind legs and placed his front paws carefully on Harry’s chest, nuzzling at his cheek. Once Harry was smiling and nuzzling him back, he climbed down and curled into his arms, purring.

“I get it. Shut up, Harry, huh?”

“Mrrrt.”

“Right.”

“Harry?”

Harry looked up at Severus as he entered.

“Who won?” Severus asked with a smile.

“Undecided. Cuddles were more important than finishing the game.”

“They’re usually more important than most things. Harry, I need you to come downstairs with me,” he said gently as he perched on the end of the bed.

“Why?” he asked warily.

“There’s a man here to talk to you, about the allegations against Albus,” he said gently and Harry buried his face in Potter’s white fur. “He’s been asked by the Ministry to be the one to talk to you. He’s an old friend of mine, he’s a good man.”

“You know him?”

“I do. His name is Magnus Bane, he’s a Warlock. Actually, he’s the High Warlock of Brooklyn.”

“Do you trust him?”

“I do. I promise, Harry, he’s a good man. You can trust him to be truthful.”

“Okay.”

Harry carried Potter with him as he followed Severus to the kitchen.

Magnus Bane was not what Harry had expected. He was young, not much older than Harry himself, and short, and human-looking. He was a beautiful Asian man, a little taller than Harry was, with an abundance of glitter and jewellery. His eye makeup was flawless.

It was the first time Harry had met someone so unashamedly flamboyant. It was nice.

He was laughing and joking with Sol, with a young man by his side. The young man was taller, almost as tall as Severus, dark hair, blue eyes, and absolutely covered in tattoos.

“Magnus, this is Harry,” Sirius said.

“Ah, this is the one,” he said, looking Harry up and down. “Yes, I see it. Lily and James, it’s so obvious. I hope he’s not quite as exasperating as those two were.”

“Mags,” the young man admonished. “You’re supposed to be here professionally.”

“I was simply expressing a hope, darling,” he said, tiptoeing up to kiss his cheek. “Forgive me, Mr. Potter, I’m being terribly lax in my manners. I am Magnus Bane, High Warlock of Brooklyn. And this handsome creature is Alexander Lightwood, Shadowhunter from the New York Institute.”

“I don’t understand,” Harry murmured.

“What don’t you understand, pup?” Sirius prompted.

“We never covered Warlocks. Or Shadowhunters.”

“Oh!” Severus said with a chuckle. “They’re not creatures, love. They’re people, just special ones, like Sol and Miri are. Come, sit, we’ll explain.”

They all settled around the table and Anne provided tea and coffee. Potter was happy to stay in Harry’s lap and glare at the new faces.

“Harry, the Wizarding world is much vaster than those at school would lead you to believe,” Severus said. “There are many things that are not taught, things that should be. Warlocks and Shadowhunters are two such things. Though, seeing as we’re so rarely in need of their services, it’s not truly a surprise you don’t know.”

“There are things in the world much darker than the dark wizards you’ve encountered,” Sirius said. “Demons, elves, ghosts. We have some of it in our everyday lives, but Magnus and Alec live in a different way. They deal with it all the time.”

“They live in the Shadow World,” Solarin said. “It’s a lot darker than our world, more dangerous. The magics there are more primal, easier to get lost in. When the Wizarding World truly screws up, or vampires go rogue, or some other major problem that could expose us to those without magic, they’re called in. They were last helping us when Voldemort first gained power.”

“So they’re like Auror’s but tougher?” Harry summarised.

“And with more brains,” Magnus said.

“Hey, my best friend became an Auror,” Sol defended.

“Then she’s the exception, not the rule,” he said. “I got the letter about what they did to you. I don’t trust them.”

“Magnus, drop it.”

“No, shan’t,” he said, poking out his tongue and she rolled her eyes. He waved his hand and a cocktail appeared before him.

“Seriously?” Sirius said.

“It’s Happy Hour somewhere, my dear. Now, back to what Alec and I are.”

“You’re magical,” Harry said. “But not a wizard?”

“No. Wizards are born with natural normal magic. Human parents. A warlock is born of a human parent and a demon one. My father is a demon. My magic does not have limitations such as yours does, but there are many of your spells I cannot do. For instance, I cannot conjure something, make it out of thin air or a few random objects.”

“He steals it,” Alec said. “That cocktail was sitting on a bar somewhere in the world before he pulled it through the ether.”

“I left money for it.”

“Good.”

“Half demon? But you’re not a demon? You’re not…bad?” Harry asked.

“No, love, he’s not,” Severus assured. “Magnus taught us when we were younger, he was the Defence professor for our seventh year.”

“Why’d you leave?”

“I disagreed with Albus over a few things and it became clear to me that the environment was not beneficial to me,” Magnus said carefully.

“Okay. If Severus says I can trust you, then okay. What about Shadowhunters?” Harry asked.

“We’re half angel,” Alec said. “We hunt down rogue demons, vampires, werewolves and such. We keep the peace more than anything.” He motioned to his arms, his dark tattoos. “These are runes, we burn them into our skin to give us more skills, like speed or healing.”

“Oh. Angels exist?”

“Never met one,” Alec said, shrugging. “But probably.”

“Oh.” Harry looked up at Severus and the older man grimaced.

“I’ve never met Mr. Lightwood before. I don’t know him. He’s with Magnus.”

“I assure you, Alec can be trusted,” Magnus promised. “He’s here to aid me and ensure all things are done correctly, that’s all. He’ll pass no judgements, and he’ll keep everything strictly between us here.”

“The Council of Shadowhunters were contacted by the Ministry of Magic,” Alec said. “With all the changes happening and all the things that have come to light, they asked us to step in, to oversee things until we’re not needed anymore. Magnus is highly respected in the Shadow World, so he was asked to head up this investigation. In this case, an allegation has been levelled against Albus Dumbledore, and we need to investigate it.”

“And that’s it?” Harry prodded. “That’s all you want to talk about?”

“That’s it,” Magnus promised. “We simply need to ask a few questions about Albus and how you grew up, see what we can find out from your point of view. There are no right or wrong answers, it’s not a test. We just need you to tell us what you remember.”

Harry sighed and stroked his cat for a while, before he looked up at Severus.

“Do I have to?”

“I’m afraid it is important, love,” Severus said, leaning in and nuzzling his cheek, pressing a kiss to his ear. “Please? Just this once?” he whispered.

“You’ll stay?”

“Of course.”

“Everyone else has to leave. I can’t tell them, they can’t know.”

Severus looked at the others. “I am afraid you may not stay for this conversation.”

They all nodded and smiled before leaving them alone. They all knew what it was like to have things you wanted kept private, and Harry had as much right to privacy as they did.

“Now will you talk about things?” Severus asked gently.

“Fine,” he sighed. “What do you want to know?”

Severus picked him up and settled him in his lap, holding him close as Magnus consulted the notes he’d brought.

“First things first, is it Harry or Mr. Potter-Snape?”

“Just Harry.”

“Perfect. Now. I’d like to talk about your aunt and uncle. Their names are Petunia and Vernon Dursley?”

“Yes.”

“Number 4, Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey?”

“Yes.”

“And they have a son your age, Dudley.”

“Yes.”

“Very good, makes the paperwork easier,” Magnus said and Alec smirked.

“You’re over 700 years old and you’re complaining about paperwork?”

“It’s boring. I like fun things.”

“You don’t look that old,” Harry said.

“Warlocks reach their majority and then stop aging,” Magnus said. “Harry, it’s noted in these records that your first letter of invitation to Hogwarts was addressed to the cupboard under the stairs. Can you tell me why that was?”

“It was my room,” Harry mumbled.

“Your room?” Alec asked. “But the records state it to be a four bedroom house.”

“I slept in the cupboard until the letters came. Then I got Dudley’s second room.”

“Second room? He had two?” Alec and Magnus shared a look before Magnus continued.

“I suppose it could be quite cosy. A small space can be quite comfortable, if decorated correctly.”

Harry shrugged. “It wasn’t so bad.”

“Did you have a bed?”

“Yes.”

“Harry,” Severus prompted. “They need to know. No one will get angry at you. Just tell them the truth of it.”

Harry sighed and cuddled Potter closer, staring at the table. “It was a toddler bed,” he mumbled.

“Excuse me?” Magnus said weakly. “A toddler bed?”

“It was Dudley’s old one. It was okay. A bit lumpy. But it was a bed. My first cupboard didn’t have one, so it was quite nice really.”

“First cupboard?”

“Under the kitchen sink. But then the doors wouldn’t close. So I moved under the stairs.”

“Alright,” Magnus said, carefully keeping his face blank and voice calm. Severus knew what awaited the two visitors in this conversation, and he wondered how they would take it. Magnus seemed to be doing very well.

“Let’s move on a little,” Alec suggested. “I’ve got a note here that you were very thin when you were first measured for your school uniform at age eleven. The numbers are well below what would be expected of an eleven year old, so Madame Malkin had to make your uniform specially. Can you tell me why that was?”

Harry shrugged and Severus prompted him to speak once more.

“I got the leftovers,” he said. “From the meals, I got what was left over, what they didn’t eat.”

“And this was every meal?”

“I think so.”

“What about water? Was that kept from you also?”

“No, not after I fainted.”

The conversation went downhill from there. All the hand me downs that never fit, all the times Harry had been starved or chased or verbally abused.

He remembered being very small and trying to hug Aunt Petunia. The way she had looked at him, as if she could catch something from him, as if a slug had asked for a hug. He never forgot it.

He’d once called Uncle Vernon ‘daddy’ by mistake and been locked in his cupboard for two weeks. After Dudley had beat the crap out of him for trying to ‘steal’ his father.

The teachers at primary school trying to make enquiries only to be met by Petunia and Vernon’s lies about his incurable criminality.

Neighbours whispering about the strange little boy from Number 4, and oh, weren’t they so good to take in that boy? It had to be so hard, dealing with a child so disturbed.

Every time Aunt Marge came to stay, she’d let her dog loose on him, whichever one she’d decided to bring with her. He still had scars on his legs from being bitten, even if they did blend in with his other scars.

He couldn’t remember ever being told he’d done something well, that he was worth something, that they wanted him around. By the time he got to Hogwarts, it was a wonder he wasn’t a complete shell of a person.

Once he was at Hogwarts, things had improved slightly, only in the way that nine months out of the year he could eat properly.

Magnus and Alec were severely unimpressed at the bars on Harry’s window and cat flap for meals. They were even less impressed by Molly’s actions regarding Harry. Her actions were a very large concern.

Then they moved on to what had happened while in the school, while directly under Albus Dumbledore’s care.

They covered Quirrel, the Philosopher’s Stone, Lockhart and the basilisk, Buckbeak and Hagrid’s teaching methods, the Triwizard Tournament. Even the events the night Voldemort died. With every new revelation, it looked even more bleak for Dumbledore.

“Did Madame Pomfrey ever express any concern over your physical state?” Magnus asked.

“Of course,” Harry said and they looked relieved.

“Harry, love, he doesn’t mean your injuries. He means to ask if Poppy ever worried about your failure to gain weight,” Severus corrected. “Did she ever worry about your nutrition? Did she ever ask about the conditions at home?”

“Oh. No, she never asked about those.”

“Okay, moving swiftly on,” Magnus redirected. “Harry, I’d like to touch briefly on what you were taught in school regarding health and sexual knowledge.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Were you ever given a class on how to protect yourself from pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections? Or one on puberty? Ever any mentions of consent in regards to being intimate?”

“No, we never got any of those classes.”

“None of them, not a single class?” Alec asked incredulously.

“No.”

Magnus and Alec shared a look.

“I think we’ve talked about enough now,” Magnus said. “I’m certain this will be enough for the Council. Thank you for talking to us, Harry. I know it was a difficult conversation but it really was very important.”

Harry nodded and Severus whispered in his ear that he could go back upstairs if he wanted. He didn’t say goodbye, just cuddled Potter close and left the room.

“Is he okay?” Alec asked.

“It’s difficult for him to talk about all of this,” Severus said. “It is not your fault, his reactions.”

“Oh, we know,” Magnus assured. “I’ll be candid, because you’re directly involved. Harry is not the first abused child we’ve talked to in the past few days. This is not the only allegation of this kind against Albus Dumbledore. Some of those children are far less able to express things to us. He did well, Severus. I’m pretty sure there won’t need to be another conversation like this, I’ve tried to be thorough. I can’t think of anything I missed. But if there is something you think we should know, please don’t hesitate.”

“You should talk to Sam Jones,” he said, accepting the martini Magnus made appear for him. “He’s a Healer at St Mungo’s. He’s been caring for Harry for a while now, and I’ve consulted with him on Harry’s care and the best ways to ensure he’s got the best. He has a file on Harry’s medical history, including some Muggle doctor visits and the school nurse from primary school. There is also a small file from Muggle Social Services.”

“We weren’t made aware that the Muggle authorities were involved,” Alec said, flipping through his notes.

“They weren’t. Someone Obliviated the social worker in charge of Harry’s case, made him slip through the gaps. Someone interfered.” He sighed and rubbed his face. “The medical records from his early years are not Harry’s. They’re notes made in Dudley Dursley’s file about Harry when Harry happened to be in the room. Again, a note was made for social services, and again, someone interfered.”

“Severus, you understand what this implies,” Magnus said. “That someone knew of the abuse and neglect and purposefully concealed it. That Harry was left to suffer, purposefully.”

“Yes, I know. And I think you can guess who I believe that someone is.”

“Severus, if you’re saying this on the record, that you allege this against Albus Dumbledore, it will have to be noted down and investigated. Are you sure you want to lodge this allegation?”

“Yes, I’m sure.”

“Okay then,” Magnus sighed, noting it down. “Then I think we’re done here. We might need to talk to you again. But aside from that, I think we’re done.”

He and Alec gathered up their things and made their way to the fireplace.

“We’ll probably be seeing you soon,” Magnus said. “We’re at the school for the time being, overseeing the exams, making sure things are happening properly.”

“Good luck.”

“Thanks, I think we’re going to need it,” Alec said with a smile before they shot away in a flash of green flames.

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Miri hated the Floo.

She fussed and projected her dislike the second Harry picked her up. She had been happily stacking tins in the cupboard while final preparations for travel were made. And then her Carrier had scooped her up and interrupted.

“Miri, stop it,” Harry ordered. “Just hold onto Carrier for a moment and then you can go play again.”

“No!” she demanded, pushing at him and reaching for the tins. “No! A pay!”

“Miri, stop it,” Severus countered, covering her with a blanket and making her shriek in anger.

Harry was guided to the fireplace and Severus threw the powder in for him.

“Hogwarts, Headmistresses Office!” Harry called clearly, and closed his eyes against the spinning. He slowed and stopped, strong hands catching him as he swayed.

Sirius guided him forwards and Remus pulled the blanket off Miri. She scowled until she looked around, seeing where she was. And then she clutched at Harry.

“Fawkes is still here?” Harry asked in surprise at the bird watching him from his perch. He propped Miri on his hip and crossed to the bird, holding his hand out and stroking his head when he ducked into the touch.

“Refused to help Albus,” McGonagall said from behind her desk, not looking up from her paperwork.

The office hadn’t changed as much as he had imagined. There were a few less knickknacks, a few more books, and a curious pile of cat toys in the corner. The spindly tables had been replaced with ones that were more sturdy, and the whole space had had a good thorough cleaning. But mostly, it was unchanged. The same portraits watching them from the walls, the same basic layout, the same chairs they had all sat in many times before.

The round table in the window, the one that usually held some elaborate set up of spell work or potion making and Harry had always been afraid to go near, was covered in papers and quills, books and pots of ink. Which wasn’t so different than usual, except the inks were neon colours, and the quills were elaborate peacock feathers with solid gold nibs rather than the usual silver or steel.

“Minerva, wonderful to see you,” Severus said as he stepped through.

“Severus,” she said, finishing up what she was writing with a flourish. “Ah. I’m with you now. My pile of paperwork grows every day, it’s never ending.”

“Thoughts of retirement?” Remus asked as he smiled indulgently at Nixie sorting through the tin of biscuits Minerva had on her desk.

“Heavens, no! I can finally change things, make things better. I just wish my hands didn’t cramp quite so often,” she said. “Now, I’ve had rooms made ready for you. You will be sharing with Mr Bane and Mr Lightwood, but they’ve assured me that you’ll hardly notice them.”

Fawkes was finally persuaded to remove himself from his perch on Harry’s head and they followed her to their rooms. It was the same set they stayed in last time they were resident in the castle, only this time Miri had a toddler bed instead of a crib. Harry hadn’t known four-poster beds that small existed.

Dinner was in the Great Hall, where they noticed that the stringent lines that had existed between the houses had blurred. Once the food had arrived on the tables, students moved wherever they liked. Ravenclaw’s on the Hufflepuff table, yellow in with the red, green scattered everywhere. Harry saw a Slytherin seventh year help a tiny Gryffindor first year cut his dinner.

“Is this all because he’s gone?” Harry asked aloud as Miri accepted a buttered roll from Neville to have with her stew.

“It seems so,” Severus agreed.

“It’s all different now,” Seamus said. “It’s like Dumbledore was keeping us all separate. Hagrid isn’t teaching anymore, they said his lessons were too dangerous and unplanned. He took it well, back to being Gamekeeper. I heard he’s taking lessons too, that he got a wand and everything.”

“That’s great,” Hermione said.

“Yeah,” Dean agreed. “New nurse is pretty good too. Nicer than Pomfrey anyhow. And she doesn’t just chuck a potion at you. I thought Pomfrey was great but now we’ve got a new nurse, it’s really clear how tired she was. It was like she’d lost the energy she needed to treat anyone. And the food is all better. The Elves are using better ingredients or something. Taste it.”

Harry did and blinked as the flavours burst on his tongue in a way they never had before.

“That is because they’re higher quality ingredients,” Magnus said as he sat down with them, his cat eyes glinting in the candlelight. “The Elves can now afford to buy better because their funds aren’t being skimmed.”

“Skimmed?” Remus asked.

“Albus was skimming money off the top of everything,” Alec said. “Every budget was being falsified so he could pad his bank account. It’s very impressive. It’s also very illegal.”

“Very,” Magnus agreed. “All the stolen money has been recovered and fed back into the school. The amount of structural damage that has gone unrepaired is incredible. Landscaping, the rooves, the bricks, the foundations, the very magic the school relies on to stay hidden. All neglected.”

“For how long?” Severus asked worriedly.

“At least twenty years, some of our builders estimate it’s closer to thirty.”

“But the enchantments need to be renewed every five years, to keep them at optimal strength and effectiveness,” Hermione gasped, horrified.

“Precisely. It’s a wonder anything is still working. And the curriculum! I’ve never seen such poor planning in all my life! It’s a wonder anyone has graduated at all in the last five decades.”

“Mags,” Alec warned. “Tone it down.”

“I know, you’re right. But so am I. It’s incredible what he got away with simply because of his name.”

“I have a question,” Harry said gently, stroking Miri’s curls as she sipped at her cup of juice. “Is he as powerful as everyone believes? Is he really the most powerful wizard in the world?”

“No, he’s not,” Alec said carefully. “We’re not quite sure of where he falls on the scale but he’s not at the top. You yourself actually beat him there. As does Solarin, and probably this little one.”

Harry pressed a kiss to Miri’s curls and looked imploringly at Severus.

“Miri, sweetheart, Daddy and Carrier will be back. Stay with your grandpa’s,” he said and she nodded with a smile.

Remus took Severus’ seat and the Potions Master took Harry outside. He tucked them between two tall bushes and cuddled him close.

“It’s all okay, love. I promise. No one is going to raise her up on a pedestal except us and that’s because we’re her parents. No one is going to treat her the way you were, I promise.”

“I’m so scared for her, Severus,” he whispered, clinging to him.

“I know, and you are absolutely allowed to be.”

“Severus…”

“Hush,” he soothed, swaying them. “For now, she’s just a little girl, and she shall stay just a little girl for as long as I can possibly keep her that way.”

“And if it takes becoming a slave again?”

“Then I’ll do it, in a heartbeat. Nothing has changed. I was willing to sell myself for Solarin, I will do the same for Miri if it’s needed. I will do whatever is needed to keep her safe, and you, if I must.”

Harry let himself relax into the strong arms and concentrated on taking slow deep breaths. He knew every parent worried about their child, the good ones anyway. He knew he had the same worries for his baby as every other mother on the planet.

It didn’t make it easier to handle.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

The morning of the first exam was not the bright sunshine everyone had been hoping for. It might have made it a bit more bearable to be stuck in the Great Hall for hours if there was some nice weather. Blue skies, maybe some fluffy clouds to watch while thinking.

The morning of the first exam was a thunderstorm.

Hagrid and Flitwick fenced off the lake for fear of it flooding its banks. The rooves were frantically covered by the builders. Students and teachers tried not to use the outdoor pathways, even if it meant being late.

“I guess that picnic idea is out,” Harry said as they waited to go in.

The thunder hadn’t helped his nerves any, but Minerva had given him permission to make some adjustments to ease his way. He was wearing a pair of sweatpants and one of Severus’ jumpers to make himself more comfortable. He hated clothes that were restrictive, they were too close to the manacles.

“Yes, which is a shame,” Severus agreed.

Miri was happily running in and out of peoples legs, lightening the mood of the stressed out seventh years. Her high giggle put a smile on even the most high strung face, even if it was a small smile.

“I’m sure we’ll find something to do, won’t we, sweetheart?” Severus asked as she barrelled into his legs, grinning up at him.

“Up!”

“What do you say?” Harry prompted.

“Pease!”

“Good girl,” Severus praised, stooping to hoist her up just as Solarin appeared in the doorway.

Solarin was dressed very unlike herself. Harry had never actually seen her in a robe before. He’d believed she didn’t own one. But she was in a very presentable black robe, her makeup simplistic and minimal, her hair braided in a tidy rope over one shoulder. She winked at Harry and ruined the whole serious look, which helped him relax.

“Just remember, I will still love you even if you fail every exam. It’s just a piece of paper, it does not define how much you are worth,” Severus stressed.

“I know, I’ll remember,” Harry promised. Severus kissed him and then he kissed Miri. “Be good for Daddy, Miri. I’ll see you in a little while.”

She waved as he and her aunts and uncle filed in for their Transfiguration exam, and then looked to Severus.

“Well. Not very nice weather, is it, sweetheart?”

“A rainin’.”

“Yes, raining very hard. So we can’t play outside. Hmmm. How about…we go…to the library? We can see the books, talk with Madam Pince. Yes?”

“A show my dagon?” she asked, holding up her toy.

“I’m sure she would love to see your dragon,” he promised as he set her on her feet.

She reached up and held his hand and they toddled through the castle. Miri liked the paintings that moved, the statues, the suits of armour. She was happy to babble away at him, telling him all she could see and he smiled indulgently to himself.

“Daddy! Kitty!”

“Hold on,” he said firmly, squatting down to hold her close. “Now, this is not your kitty. He might not want to say hello.”

“Oh. I want to say hello,” she said practically.

“Yes, I know. Hold out your hand to him. If he wants to say hello, he will come to you.”

She held out her hand and the tomcat stared at her before he cautiously padded over and sniffed her fingers. After a few sniffs, he plonked his butt down and butted his head into her hand. She was gentle as she scratched behind his ears and under his chin, and then he flopped back so she could scratch his belly.

“Daddy, is Cauldron happy?”

“Of course, you take very good care of him.”

“He miss me?”

“Oh, I see. Well, yes, I suppose he does miss you. But it’s only for a little while. When Carrier has finished doing these tests, we’ll go home to Cauldron, and you can play with him and take care of him.”

“Okay. Library now?”

He smiled and pressed a kiss to her curls. She said goodbye to the cat, who then wandered off to wherever it was cats went in the castle, and then took his hand so they could continue on. The stairs were a mountain for her, but she liked climbing them.

The library was not as Severus remembered. He didn’t recall there being a box city taking up most of the floors and tables.

“Daddy, where the books?”

“I don’t know. Come on, pumpkin patch. Let’s see if we can find the nice library lady.”

She giggled and trailed him around the stacks of cardboard and wood, following the running commentary Irma Pince was making as boxes were emptied.

“Irma?”

“Severus! Oh, I heard you were here.”

He pressed his lips together at her hair trailing from its usual severe bun, her sleeves rolled up, and bright spots of colour on her cheeks from exertion.

“Yes, we thought we might come and find a book to read, but I see that might be difficult.”

Miri giggled at the House Elf carting a stack of books.

“Daddy! Look!”

“Oh, Severus, she’s beautiful!”

He smiled and squatted down to her height. “I see, baby. She’s a House Elf.”

“Lots of books,” she said, leaning into him. “Lots and lots and lots.”

“Yes, lots of books.”

“Gampa Re’Us like it here.”

He chuckled. “Yes, I think he would. I’m sure he’ll come and look at it later.” He watched her for a few minutes as she toddled off to investigate a stack of parchment, and then stood and faced Irma as she decided to take them one by one and make another stack right next to it.

“Wonderful to see you,” she said, giving a quick hug. “I didn’t expect to see you today.”

“No, we didn’t plan on it. But the weather put a stop to the idea of a picnic. What on earth is all this?”

“New books! Minerva has given me triple the budget I had before, and that’s just for books. I get a stipend for parchment and ink and quills too, and the tables and chairs are being replaced if needed. I’ve never had so much to do!” she chuckled.

“Well, that’s certainly unexpected. Would you like some help?”

Irma set him to shelving books and Miri happily helped empty boxes, making towers of books and babbling away. Most of the new books were Muggle, works of fiction to spark imaginations and creativity. A few manuals on home repair and general cleaning, to give graduates some idea of how to run their homes. Cookery was a new section, and Severus made a mental note to take a look before they left for dinner ideas. Books on sewing and knitting were the basis of the new craft section. Irma said that somewhere in the boxes were books on art and drawing, ceramics, toy making, bookbinding, and a whole range of other crafts.

Hogwarts was no longer singularly focussed on the magical arts. The Board of Governors and the Ministry of Magic wanted the school to offer a more rounded education, offering real life skills as well as magical skill and knowledge. From September, every student would be required to complete a course of Life Skills lessons, which covered everything from paying bills to sewing on a button.

It was amazing how very little the students knew of the real world. No one had thought to tell them these things, and as a result the Ministry had seen a rise in the number of witches and wizards falling into debt and hospitalised for simple ailments they should have been able to treat themselves.

Severus wholeheartedly approved of the Personal Health class that every student had to take. Everything from proper nutrition to personal hygiene to sex. Just so long as he wasn’t the one who had to teach it.

“Who is working out the logistics of adding new classes?” Severus asked, sorting texts of grammar and spelling so they could be shelved.

“Minerva and the Ministry are working together to figure it all out. Some of the classes will be in the evening and on weekends, the more fun and elective ones, like art and such. No one wants to take away from the time students have to study, we all want them to gain the qualifications they need later on. But there has to be other things too,” Irma said. “Oh, the exam should be letting out soon.”

He glanced at the clock and smiled. He and Miri said goodbye before making their way down to meet Harry. He emerged looking relieved.

“Seems like it wasn’t so bad,” Severus said as Harry scooped Miri up and cuddled her close.

“No. I remembered the movements for the Bird spell, which I was worried about, and the proper pronunciation for the incantation for a human transfiguration. I think I did okay,” Harry said.

“Good. First one is always the worst. The rest will be easier,” Severus promised. “Your practical is this afternoon. Do you feel ready or would you like to go over some things?”

“No, I feel ready, as ready as I can be. I think going over things will just make me nervous.”

“Very well. Some lunch and then we’ll relax for a while.”

They were half way through lunch when Magnus approached them.

“Severus, I was wondering if I could borrow you for a moment?”

“Of course.”

He followed the warlock to the entrance hall where there were three wizards and two witches waiting.

“Now, there’s a slight disagreement over which one gets to be Harry’s examiner,” Magnus said. “I myself will be there, overseeing his test, just to make sure procedure is being carried out properly. But we do require a Ministry examiner, and they seem to be determined to be the one to get Harry.”

“You are all aware that Harry is not the only student to be examined in Transfiguration this year, yes?” Severus pressed scathingly. “And that he has four other subjects to test for? Surely this is beneath five grown adults chosen to fulfil this task.”

“Not all of us have reverted to the level of children,” said one witch, an elderly woman who was made of steel and snappishness.

“No, just the younger of us,” said the oldest of the wizards, a bald man with a pince-nez.

“Madame Marchbanks, Professor Tofty, how wonderful to see you both. Good journey?”

“Uneventful, as I like it,” Marchbanks said, smiling. “Now, Severus, we understand that Mr Potter has been through a rather trying time, and in these instances we like to make the exams as accommodating as possible within reason of course.” She smiled and motioned to all of them. “In light of that, which of us do you think he would take to best?”

“I think he’ll probably do best with Professor Tofty. You do rather have a way with the nervous ones.”

Tofty smiled gently and shrugged. “I do what I can. He should be rather impressive to test. I’m curious as to his actual skill. Such things are almost always exaggerated, but he was particularly memorable during his O.W.L.s. Yes, very impressive, very competent young wizard. And his friend, the young woman. She stands out in my mind also.”

“Hermione, yes, she’s a very talented witch.”

“Wonderful!” Magnus said brightly. “Now we’ve gotten that sorted, I think we should prepare ourselves for the afternoon. Severus, thank you.”

“Not a problem. Good luck.”

Magnus grimaced. “Yes, I think I rather underestimated how much of it I was going to need.”

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After lunch, Severus took Miri for her nap and Harry waited for his practical exam with the other seventh years taking it. They were called in five at a time, and presumably left through another door because they didn’t return to the room they were waiting in.

“How are you doing?” Ron asked as he sat down.

“Bored,” Harry said honestly. “I’d forgotten how boring exam weeks are.”

“Yeah, I think it’s so you’ll sign up to do more of it. But, on the plus, after this it’s one down.”

“Four to go.”

“Yeah. That wasn’t as cheerful as I thought it would be.”

Alec appeared at the door with a clipboard. “Alright, final group. Abbott, Hannah. Lupin-Black, Phoenix. Potter, Harry. Weasley, Hermione. And Weasley, Ronald.”

They filed in to the Hall and were each directed to a pair of examiners. Five Ministry examiners and five from the committee investigating the school. Harry shrunk in on himself as he realised he was being stared at by three of the five Ministry examiners.

“Just ignore them, teacup,” Magnus cooed as he reached him. Standing next to Magnus was a wizard Harry recognised but couldn’t place. “Do you remember Professor Tofty?”

“Yes, I remember. My O.W.L.s. You wanted to see my Patronus.”

“Yes, my boy! Glad to see you again!” he said happily. “Are you ready?”

“As ready as I can get.”

“Good, good. We’ll start small and work our way up. Shouldn’t be anything you haven’t covered. Now, just to check, you are Harry James Potter-Snape of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry?”

“Yes.”

“And you have turned seventeen?”

“Yes.”

“Excellent. All in order.”

Harry was asked to animate a small figurine of a bowtruckle, to turn a bat into a badger and back again, to make a teacup change from china to glass, and then to make a hedgehog turn invisible. He had a little trouble making it visible again, it was still missing a back leg, but he wasn’t too worried.

“Very good. Now, I know it’s a spell not everyone can master, but I’d like you to demonstrate the proper wand work and incantation for the Animagus spell,” Magnus said. “It’s noted that you’ve completed the necessary preparations and the potion has been consumed. It’s noted here that you’re just having a little trouble submitting to the full transformation. In light of this, if you cannot transform it will not cost you too many marks, we’re looking for the proper procedure,” Magnus assured. “It’s a bonus for those who have completed the preparations.”

Harry gulped. He’d had trouble with that particular spell for months. He had managed to make his teeth pointed once, but never a full transformation. He’d done the mandrake leaf in the mouth every day for a month, the incantation every morning and evening, the wand pointed at his heart during the final spell. Now it was just the change. Severus said he was rare in not being able to transform now. By all rights he should be able to. But Magnus was right, it required submission to something changing your physical form. Harry had a little trouble with the whole submitting bit.

Everyone else had finished. They were watching him, waiting, until Magnus raised an eyebrow and most of them scattered. All but Ron and Hermione. They wouldn’t leave without him.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. The first transformation required a fourteen point wand movement with a specific pronunciation of the correct incantation.

He opened his eyes to see Ron smiling gently at him, and clearly said, “Amato Animo Animato Animagus!”

It was small at first, just a tickle under his ribs, and then it spread until his whole body was shuddering. ‘Just relax,’ Severus said in his memory. ‘Nothing bad will happen to you, my love. It’s just like enjoying sex. Relax and let the pleasure take you. Just the same, Harry. Just relax and let it happen.’

It happened in an instant, between one breath and the next. Harry was standing there, staring at Ron, and then suddenly he was a lot closer to the floor.

{What the bloody hell!} he said, or at least he tried to.

Ron was rushing over to him, Hermione running for the door, and Magnus and Tofty were suddenly very very tall. Everything was very tall. Oh, shit. Was he a mouse? A rat? A cockroach!?

“Harry, calm down, mate,” Ron ordered as he skidded to his knees. “Come on. Don’t panic.”

{Don’t panic? Are you frigging kidding!} Harry replied, except he didn’t. All he did was let out a series of high sort of squeaking sounds. {What am I?!}

“Oh sweet Merlin!” Solarin giggled as she entered. “Harry! You’re adorable!”

{Yes, yes, adorable, and small. WHAT AM I???}

“Yikes, no need to shout. You’re a puppy. A…well, I’m not sure of the breed. A teacup something,” she said, kneeling and holding out a hand. He batted her with a paw and promptly fell over.

“No student has ever done their first transformation in the exam before,” Tofty said. “It was most impressive. Full marks, Mr Potter.”

{Thanks, I think.}

“He said thanks,” Solarin translated.

“Harry?”

{Oh, this is great.}

“Oh, pup, look at you,” Remus said. “Very well done. Didn’t expect this, but oh well. Not like you get a choice.”

“Yes. I assumed you’d be a stag, like James,” Sirius said. “But you’re all fully formed and glaring at us, so it’s all good.”

“Don’t worry, Severus is coming. Just waiting for Nixie to get to him. She’ll tell him he’s needed and stay with Miri,” Remus promised, holding out a hand to him. He whined and Remus gently stroked the top of his head with a fingertip. “Oh, don’t look so sad, Harry. You’ll turn back. You just need a little practice to get the hang of it.”

{Practice? Practice? I’m the size of a shoe and you’re telling me to practice? Are you serious right now?}

“You don’t want to know,” Solarin said.

“Harry? Oh, my. Well. This isn’t quite what I pictured, love.”

{Severus! Severus! Down here! Fix me! Fix me! Fix me!}

Severus looked to his sister.

“He wants you to fix him.”

“Oh, love, it doesn’t work like that. These first few transformations, I can’t turn you back. You have to do it. But you will turn back on your own, I promise. If nothing, you’ll turn back when you sleep.”

“He’s right,” Sirius assured. “It won’t last through a night of sleep. Once you go into deep sleep, it wears off. You reset yourself.”

{This is complete bull! I’m a pocket pet! I was NOT supposed to be the size of a sandwich!}

“Alright, stop yelling,” Severus demanded at the high frantic yipping. “One yip for yes, two for no,” Severus instructed, picking him up. He growled a little half-heartedly, and then settled in his arms. He pawed about clumsily on his new paws until he could slip himself into the breast pocket of Severus’ shirt. “You don’t like the form?”

{Well…}

“A half a yip. So I’m guessing you’re not too sure of it yet. Yes?”

Yip.

“Good. Well, we can talk about that when you’re on two legs again. You’re very well formed. All black, quite fluffy, bright green eyes. We’ll figure out your breed later. Now, does anything hurt?”

Yip yip.

“Very good. Hungry?” Yip. “Thirsty?” Yip. “Dinner in our rooms I think.”

“Does anything ever freak you out?” Ron asked as he headed to the door, Harry curled in his pocket.

“Consider who I’m married to and then ask me that.”

Severus carried Harry back to their rooms. Thankfully, no one stopped him to talk, so Harry didn’t have a chance to panic about anyone seeing him.

Their daughter was another matter.

“Daddy and Caya home!” Miri crowed, smile huge. She and Nixie were sat at the coffee table, drawing with crayons.

“Were you a good girl?” Severus asked, toeing his shoes off.

“She was an angel,” Nixie promised. “Where’s Harry?”

Severus reached into his pocket and pulled out the tiny puppy. Harry really was minuscule. And fluffy. His green eyes looked especially bright surrounded by the cloud of his fur.

“Daddy, why Caya a puppy?”

“Well, Carrier had a little trouble with a spell. He’ll turn back soon, just as soon as he figures out how. But for now he’s like this. Can you be careful with him?”

“I be careful. Like with Cauldron.”

“Very good.”

Severus carefully transferred Harry to her little hands and he yipped excitedly, his little tail wagging as he licked at her face.

“Caya! Tickle!”

{Carrier loves you, baby. Very very much.}

“Love you,” she said, cuddling him close and carrying him to the table.

Harry happily sat on the table, watching her draw, while they waited for the others to come back. Miri babbled away at him, telling him stories she made up that went round and around on themselves without an ending in sight. He loved them, loved how full her imagination was.

“You can’t stay like that forever,” Nixie said as she joined them. “Sure, you’re cute and all, but you can’t even manage stairs like this. You need thumbs, Harry.”

He growled and laid down, putting his head on his paws. He knew he couldn’t stay a puppy, knew he had to change back, he even wanted to. But it was kind of fun, being so little. He liked being carried by Severus, and by Miri. Okay, so it wasn’t what he had envisioned when he started the preparations for the Animagus spell. But it wasn’t so bad.

“Slow down, you overgrown mutt!”

Harry yipped as Sirius appeared in his dog-form.

{Wow, you’re big like this. Or I’m small. Hey! Put me down!}

Remus chuckled as Sirius carefully picked Harry up in his mouth and carried him off to the rug in front of the fireplace.

“Siri, that wasn’t strictly necessary was it?” Remus asked as Sirius curled around the little ball of fluff.

“He says it was entirely necessary,” Solarin said, closing the portrait behind her. She was the last one in.

“Is it normal for someone to be that small when they change?” Alec asked.

“They knew a rat. And McGonagall turns into a cat,” Solarin said.

“And?” Severus prompted.

“And nothing,” she said, glaring.

“No, you can’t do that,” Ron said. “You’re on the Register? You have to tell us.”

“Oh, you j-e-r-k,” she spelled, glaring at Severus. “Yes, I am, I can change. And no, I’m not going to.”

Harry yipped from the rug and tried, again, to get to his feet. Sirius lounged, watching him, until he fell again. So Sirius pushed his nose under Harry’s belly and nudged him up, helping him figure out how to move on four legs. Slowly, he managed to move his feet, like Bambi on the ice.

“That’s it, Harry,” Severus praised. “Keep going.”

Harry managed to find a rhythm, get the hang of it in a fairly short amount of time. He trotted off the rug and began to explore, his much more sensitive nose leading him. Miri’s crayons on the floor didn’t smell too pleasant, but her little hands smelled of baby powder and chocolate. He wondered if Severus knew someone had given their baby extra sweeties.

Hermione smelled of ink and paper and some kind of glue, Ron of Sugar Quills. Remus smelled of fudge. He reared up on his hind legs and whined until Remus chuckled and scooped him up, reclining on the sofa. Harry made himself at home, padding this way and that on Remus’ chest until he finally lay down and looked around the room. He could see so much more from up here.

“That is not the way a regular puppy lays,” Remus said softly. He poked at the two hind legs stretched out straight behind him. “These are supposed to be tucked under you.”

He wagged his tail and yipped, making Remus chuckle.

“Fine, do it your way. Would you like Sirius to talk you through changing back?”

Harry grumbled and lay his head down.

“Not just yet then,” Severus said. “Ah. Decided to stop being so petty, have you?”

There was a beautiful black owl perched on the back of Severus’ chair, who clicked her beak at him in annoyance.

“You wanted to see her Animagus,” he said to Ron, who smiled.

“Sol, you’re beautiful like this!” he said and her feathers puffed.

“She doesn’t like it,” Severus revealed. “Hates that she’s something that flies.”

She screeched in agreement and hopped down onto his shoulder. He held his hand up and she hopped on, and then he lowered her to the floor where she strutted about.

“Pretty!” Miri said as she came close.

Solarin held very still as Miri carefully stroked her, tilting her head and trilling in amusement as the baby Augur giggled.

“I dread to think the conversation they’re having,” Magnus said.

Solarin screeched at him in offence.

“Forgive me. Your thoughts are all pure as a driven white snow, I’m sure.”

She managed to fly enough to cuff him around the head with a wing.

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Severus awoke to the darkness of his temporary bedroom when the weight beside him suddenly increased.

Dinner had been in their rooms, and Miri had only thrown a small fit when it was Severus to give her her bath. Severus perched Harry on the side of the tub to calm her down, which was fine until he slipped in and had to learn incredibly fast how to doggy paddle. He was fine once Severus moved the bubbles out of his way. Bedtime for Miri was a new experience. It was always Harry that did it before. Now she had to have a bottle of warm milk instead of nursing, cuddled into Daddy with her Carrier in her arms, a floofy warm ball. It took longer for her to settle, but she did eventually go down for the night. The House Elves had installed a litter box for Harry to use as the easiest solution to his bathroom troubles, and Severus had fallen asleep with Harry asleep in the bowl of his hand.

“Harry. Wake up, love.”

“Mmmm.”

“You’ve changed back, Harry,” he said as he pulled up the bottom of the duvet so he could pull off Harry’s shoes.

Harry slowly woke, and then looked down at himself, holding up his hands to wiggle his thumbs.

“Missed my thumbs,” he mumbled as he rolled over and cuddled in. “But it was okay.”

“Okay, hmmm? Do you think you could do it again?” he asked, stroking his hair.

“Probably. Miri liked it.”

“You were rather small and fluffy.” He sorted. “I think Smoo might be larger.”

“Not fair. I wanted to be something bigger. Why am I so tiny?”

“I’m not sure. The theory is that your animal form is a representation of some facet of your soul. Perhaps it is the part of that is playful.”

“Or the part that’s still terrified. I become something small that can hide anywhere, that looks all small and fluffy so people instinctively want to protect it.”

“Is that really how you see yourself?”

“A part of me, yeah. I don’t think it’ll ever go away, the part of me still back there, in that room. But that’s okay…right?”

“I think something like what you went through is supposed to stick around. It’s natural, probably, to feel like you want to hide. I would imagine you wanted to hide an awful lot in that room.”

Harry skimmed over what he wanted in that room. He never got it, no matter what he wanted. “Do you think about it? What happened in there? What he did?”

“Will you be upset if I say yes?”

“No, I’m not upset,” Harry promised.

“Then yes, I do think about it. I do try not to, I try to stay in the present and focus on what is, rather than what was. But I do think of it. I hate what was done to you,” he admitted, whispering into the dark, secrets between the two of them as they should be.

“Me too. It’s okay to hate it. It’d be really weird if we didn’t.”

“It’s very strange. I hate what happened, but I love Miri so very much. And she wouldn’t exist without what you went through. It’s terribly confusing for my brain.”

Harry pulled him into a kiss, sleepy but affectionate.

“That’s okay. As long as you know which one you love and which one you hate, it’s okay to be confused.”

Severus smiled and kissed him again before tucking him under his chin.

“Get some sleep, love.”

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Tuesday was a lazy day for Harry and Ron, but Hermione and Nixie had their Arithmancy exam.

Wednesday was Charms, Hermione had Ancient Runes on Thursday, and then they all had Herbology on Friday. The weekend was nice and sunny, so they spent it on the grounds. Charlie brought the twins for the weekend and they happily crawled across the grass, chasing Harry in his puppy form. It was easier to change into it after a little practice, and he could actually change back by choice most of the time.

Monday was a day off for all of them, as was Wednesday and Friday. Tuesday was the Defence Against the Dark Arts exam, which everyone was positive Harry had passed with flying colours, with the others not far behind him.

All four of them had their last exam on Thursday, and it was Potions. The written paper in the morning left them all feeling like wrung out sponges, and no one could say for sure what they ate for lunch. The practical in the afternoon was an exhausting six hours of steaming cauldrons, funky smells and struggle to remember measurements of gross fluids and powders.

Friday was the final day and the exams for both Divination and Muggle Studies, as they were both small classes. None of the family were in either class, so it was a day off. The whole school was planning to celebrate with a party in every Common Room come sundown, and the teachers were fully prepared to turn a liberal blind eye to most of what went on.

Severus left Harry sleeping that morning, taking Miri off for a wander around the castle. They took a long rambling path to the grounds and then to Hagrid’s, where Fang was the flavour of the moment. Miri looked particularly tiny compared to the huge dog, but he was absolutely head over heels for her, so Severus wasn’t worried in the slightest. Fang was happy to lay down, sit, stay, let her climb all over him, and use him as a sofa. Severus enjoyed sitting on the front step with a glass of Hagrid’s homemade pumpkin juice and a few cakes.

Harry found them just before lunch, which they had in the Great Hall, and then they spent the afternoon lounging on the grounds.

Harry bathed Miri and nursed her, put her to bed and made sure she was sleeping. Then he had a hot shower, put on his favourite shirt and jeans, and tried to do something with his hair.

“Are you sure this is okay?” Harry asked.

“We’ll be fine,” Severus assured. He was propped up in bed, making notes on some new potions. “Go, have fun with your friends. You’ve worked very hard, you deserve to celebrate.”

“You could come with me,” he offered, perching on the bed.

“No, this is for you and your friends,” he assured, kissing him. “Go and have fun. If I need you, or I change my mind, I know where you’ll be. And if you need me, or you decide it’s not for you, you know where I am.”

“If you’re sure…”

“I am positive.”

“Okay then. How do I look?”

Severus leaned in and kissed him hard. “You look fantastic.”

“Then I’m off.”

Severus kissed him once more and then let him go. Ron and Hermione were waiting for him with Nixie in the common room.

The music in the Gryffindor Common Room could be heard in the corridor outside, and the Fat Lady was very tipsy indeed. Once she swung open to admit them, they were pulled in by a dozen hands, friends welcoming them to the celebration.

There was food on every table, drinks flowing, laughter and dancing and mindless chatter about nothing at all. Harry was fed all manner of junk food, trusting that the hands giving it to him were hands he could trust. His friends made a happy circle around him, cocooning him in a bubble of safety and celebration.

He danced with a few friends, Dean mostly, sometimes Seamus. He and Hermione took a turn on the dancefloor, but it wasn’t very impressive. He didn’t really know how to lead and neither did she. Ron saved him from crushing her feet. Harry didn’t know when they’d learnt to move so seamlessly together.

They talked and laughed and Harry felt himself fall into his old patterns. It was nice, getting to go back for a few hours, back to when he’d just been Harry. Before Lucius and Miri and the whole world knowing about him.

It was nearing one in the morning and the party showed no sign of slowing. Harry and Nixie were taking a breather for more drinks and food, plates of things the House Elves had enthusiastically given once they found out the purpose. They kept popping in every now and then with more, happily moving amongst the students and bopping along to the music.

Dobby popped in once he heard Harry was there, and he happily joined the party for a little while, until his large ears couldn’t take the volume anymore.

“Hey, Harry! Fat Lady says Snape’s looking for you,” Dean called.

“Smart man,” Harry said. “It’s pretty late, and Miri gets up early. I should really head to bed. I’ll see you guys later.”

They waved him goodbye and he weaved his way through the masses until he reached the portrait hole. Severus was waiting for him in the window, looking out over the grounds.

“Hi,” he said, looping his arms around Severus neck. “Miss me?”

“You know I did,” he purred, holding him close. “How tired are you?”

“Fairly, why?”

“There’s something I want to show you, from the Astronomy Tower. Feel up to it?”

“I think I can manage it,” Harry grinned, taking his hand and letting Severus lead him. “Where’s Miri?”

“Sleeping. I left her in our rooms. She’ll be fine. It’s only for a little bit.”

“Yeah, you’re right. Sirius and Remus will be there. Did you tell them you were leaving?”

“They saw me go.”

“Oh,” Harry said. It wasn’t like Severus to go without saying something. But maybe he hadn’t needed to. Maybe his parents had done that thing where they grinned dirtily and nodded. “Good.”

They chatted about the party as they climbed the stairs, ducking into an alcove to avoid Filch, and then continuing on.

“Hey,” Harry said, tugging on his hand as they started the final set of stairs.

“What is it?”

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Why?”

“You seem…I don’t know. Off. Not yourself.”

“Why would I be off? I’m fine. Come on, don’t want to miss it.”

Harry frowned but followed. The Astronomy Tower was dusty and cold, and full of shadows.

Shadows that moved.

“Severus…”

Harry turned to his husband, only to see a snake-handled wand raised to end a spell, the enchantment falling away to reveal white blond hair and an arrogant sneer. The door locked with a dozen clicks and scrapes. Nothing short of a nuclear bomb was getting through it.

“Oh, Pet. Now when did I say I was Severus?”

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Severus groaned as he cracked open his eyes, woken by the clatter and giggle of the teens returning. He glanced at the clock.

Half past two. Another lie in for Harry then.

He laid there and sleepily listened to Nixie being told goodnight and Ron and Hermione lounging on the couch. Hermione sounded very giggly. He wondered idly how much they’d all had to drink before he got up to pee. He detoured to the Common Area on his way back to bed.

“Good morning,” he said and they smiled.

“Morning.”

“Have fun?”

“Yeah, it was great. You?” Ron asked.

“Nice and quiet. I got some work done and Miri’s been quiet.”

“Harry sleeping?”

Severus frowned. “Sleeping? Why would he be sleeping?”

“Because you took him an hour ago,” Hermione said. “You came to Gryffindor Tower to get him, we all saw you.”

“Hermione, I haven’t left the suite.”

They blinked for a moment before Hermione and Ron were up running, slamming open doors and waking the others.

“DOBBY!” Ron roared.

“Wheezy be calling Dobby?”

Hermione kneeled before the Elf. “Dobby, where is Harry? Can you sense him, do you know where he is?”

“Begging pardon, but Dobby cannot do that here. The Castle is too strong.”

“Dobby,” Severus barked. “In that room is Harry Potter’s daughter. I’m trusting you to protect her with your life and watch over her until we return. Can I trust you with this?”

“Oh, yes, Professor, Sir. Dobby is being looking after Little Miss. Dobby keeps her safe, on Dobby’s life,” he vowed, thin chest puffing up under his sweater.

“Good. Split up. Find him. Someone call home, tell them.”

“I will,” Remus promised. “I’ll get the map, see if he’s still on the grounds.”

They split up, Ron running to Gryffindor to raise backup, Hermione to wake McGonagall. Sirius went to wake Hagrid, get him to search the grounds, Severus to the Dungeons to alert his Slytherin’s, and all the while they alerted ghosts and portraits as they went. Soon enough the entire castle was being searched, but it was Ron that found Harry.

The door was ajar, a sliver of light pouring out into the stairwell, a scared whimpering crying filtering out.

At first, he thought he was a pile of clothes on the floor, until he saw the blood on the boards beneath him.

“Harry? Shit. Harry, come on, wake up, mate,” Ron demanded, shaking him.

“Ron. Run,” Harry whispered.

“What? I won’t run, I won’t leave you!”

Ron screamed as he was grabbed by his hair, lifted clean off the floor in an iron grip.

“Ah, Mr Weasley. How nice of you to join us,” Lucius hissed. “Unfortunately, I can’t allow you to interfere with my plans. Peter, if you would?”

Ron was thrown across the space to the huge sculpture of the planets where Peter Pettigrew was waiting. He grabbed Ron with his silver hand, gripping his throat with choking force. Bellatrix and Fenrir prowled the edges of the room, waiting for their turn. Lucius locked the door once more and approached Harry.

“Now, Pet. Do you see? It doesn’t matter if they come. It doesn’t matter who comes. No one can take you from me. I will always find you, my little Legend. You will always be mine.”

He sat Harry up and brushed his hair away from his bloodied face.

“Do you understand now?”

Harry nodded and then looked away in resignation as Lucius began removing his shirt again. He should have known it was too good to last, that his marriage to Severus could never last. It was too good, he couldn’t possibly be allowed to keep it. The Dursley’s had taught him that. He was just a dirty little freak who deserved this. Lucius had already had him twice, once in his mouth, the other in his back passage. It had hurt as much as he remembered, but he hadn’t had it in him to scream. Why Lucius bothered to drape him back in his clothes was beyond him, but he’d never understood why Lucius played the games he did. Harry knew what was coming next. Pushed to his back and taken roughly and that would be that. No walking away this time. Lucius would take him somewhere no one would find them.

He hoped so much that Miri would be loved. That she’d know how much he loved her.

But Ron hadn’t seen last time, he hadn’t known what Lucius did to him. He couldn’t look away from his friend, who was watching with growing horror.

Harry knew what he’d told Severus, that he wouldn’t let Lucius have him again. And he had tried to fight back. His wand lay in pieces, his body broken and bloody. He had tried to fight and failed in the face of four against one.

“Harry,” Ron gasped. “Harry, no, don’t give up.”

“Shut up, traitor!” Bellatrix screamed.

“Harry,” Ron continued. “Miri needs you.”

Peter pushed him back against the sculpture and punched him hard in the stomach. Ron doubled over, heaving, dropping to his knees.

“Harry,” he gasped. “Floofy.”

Harry felt very stupid. Lucius had just yanked down his jeans and underwear when Harry retreated in on himself, wanting so much to hide.

And then he was small, so small he disappeared into the fabric of his discarded clothes. The room went completely black as Ron dropped some Instant Darkness Powder from his pocket. Harry limped the way he thought Ron had been, blinded by the powder but small enough to escape being grabbed.

The upside was his little doggy nose. It was sensitive enough to pick out the smell of Butterbeer and Sugar Quills and follow it.

He tugged at Ron’s shoelaces and he was scooped up, tucked into a pocket.

“Very clever,” Lucius growled. “But not that clever.”

The air cleared, the powder blown away by the wind from the open spaces for windows.

“Where is he?” Lucius demanded, yanking Ron to his feet.

“I don’t know,” Ron said, staring Lucius right in the face. He could feel Harry trembling in his trouser pocket, and he was so thankful for Neville spilling his drink all over him. If he hadn’t, he wouldn’t have borrowed trousers way too big from Dean.

Big enough to hide one teacup Pomeranian puppy in his pocket.

“Now, now, no one needs to get hurt,” Lucius said smoothly. “You seem a smart lad. There’s a deal to be made here. Just give me what’s mine, and I’ll let you go.”

“So…I give you Harry…and I can go?”

“Exactly.”

“What happens to Harry?”

“Now, Ron, it is Ron, is it not? You don’t prefer Ronald?” he said, patting his cheek.

“No, it’s Ron.”

“Now, Ron, what happens to Harry is my business. I’ll let you go, back to your wife and children, your family. What are their lives when compared to one life?”

“You’re sick,” Ron said, his face twisted in disgust. “You think I’ll choose between Harry and the others? You think I can value one life more than others? You really are a sick bastard. They’re my family, Harry and all the others. I won’t choose any of them over the other!”

Lucius pinned him to the statue, a knife sliding from his sleeve and embedding itself in Ron’s kidney. The redhead gasped at the pain, eyes wide, gripping at Lucius’ shoulders as his knees began to give.

“You really should have just told me where he is,” Lucius said, laying him down. “There there, that’s a good lad.”

“We should go,” Fenrir said.

“I’m not leaving without my pet!” Lucius roared.

“We’ve been here too long!” Bellatrix argued. “One mangy brat found us, more will be on the way, and then we’re all buggered!”

“You got that right.”

They looked to the window where Solarin was standing, shaking off a few feathers. She ducked the jet of light from Bellatrix and rolled behind the sculpture. Moments later Severus and Sirius skidded a landing from brooms, Sirius barrelling into his cousin and Severus taking Lucius by the throat. Something heavy began to pound at the door.

“Ron? Oh shit.”

“Don’t worry about me,” Ron gasped. “Kill the fuckers.”

“Ron…I can’t. I can’t do that,” Solarin begged. “I can’t become that again.”

“They. Will. Kill. Us. All,” Ron gritted out.

“Oh, just hold on,” she begged, hands flittering over his wound, pale skin covered in blood. “Ron, just hold- AH!”

Ron tried to grab her as Fenrir ripped her away from him. There was shouting all around them, jets of light, hammering at the door, and Fenrir carried Solarin by the throat across the bare boards. She kicked and scratched, trying to breathe, trying to free herself. Ron would always remember the way her hair fluttered in the wind, the power crackling in the air around her.

“Stop what you’re doing, or I drop her,” Fenrir declared, dangling Solarin out the window, her only stop from falling his fist around her neck.

“NO!” Severus roared and Lucius took the opportunity.

Harry peeked out of Ron’s pocket, just in time to see Lucius cut Severus’ throat.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Remus stopped his axe mid-swing as an unearthly scream came from inside the room. It was neither male nor female, but full of anger and pain.

“SIRIUS!”

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Later, Ron couldn’t say for sure what he’d actually seen. It seemed like something out of some story, some movie Hermione had taken him to.

It didn’t seem real that four grown adults could just explode all at once, like a balloon at a birthday party.

The door blasted open as a piece of Bellatrix’s tongue hit his cheek, and people poured in. Remus, ever level headed, looked around, took stock of Sirius being physically okay, and then ran to grab Solarin. The witch was hanging onto the ledge by her fingernails, Fenrir’s hand still around her throat, though it was no longer attached to him.

His fingers were still twitching.

There was blood literally pouring from her nose and eyes, ears and mouth, and she was shaking like a leaf in a tornado.

“Sol, what happened?” Remus begged. “Sol? Talk to me!”

“Sevus,” she sobbed.

“He’s okay,” Hermione promised. “He’s still alive. It’s not deep. More show than damage.” She pulled off her cardigan and pressed it to Severus’ throat, stemming the flow as he reached out blindly. She pushed his hands down, Nixie helping her to calm him. “Easy, easy. It’s okay, Severus.”

“Ron,” Solarin mumbled and Sirius made his way over, pulling off his shirt and pressing it to Ron’s bleeding side, making him scream and arch away.

“I know, it hurts,” he soothed. “Point of pain is to let you know you’re alive.”

“Bloody hell, I’m fucking alive,” he ground out. “Harry.”

“We haven’t found him,” Alec said from the doorway, he and Magnus looking over the carnage and trying to figure out where to start.

Ron waved them off and gritted his teeth. He shifted just enough to get a hand into his blood-soaked pocket (his blood or someone else’s, he had no clue and really didn’t want to know).

Harry was a trembling fluff-ball in his palm.

Nixie took him and eased him into Severus’ reaching hand.

“What happened?” Magnus asked.

“I did it,” Solarin admitted quietly, and then promptly passed out.

@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Remus hovered as Harry shoved the nurse away from him again.

“Harry, please, I’d just like to take a look at those nasty cuts on your face,” she pleaded and he threw another pillow at her.

The Hospital Wing had been the closest place with supplies and beds, and Minerva had been quick to close it off from students so the family could be patched up in peace. By now, the entire school knew something had gone on, even though no one was quite sure what.

Harry had changed back to ask if Severus was okay, and Remus had wanted to resurrect Lucius when he saw Harry’s torn clothes.

Severus had lost some blood but not near what they had thought he had. Hermione had been right, it was more show than actual damage. Ron had been through several rounds of spells and was healing nicely. They were both sleeping the sleep of the heavily sedated so their bodies could heal.

Solarin was in an isolated room in the Dungeons. It was the one she’d used when she’d been a student and would protect her a little from other minds while she healed from what she’d done. The Ministry were investigating the events of the night, but no one was looking to punish her. She had been in danger, she had been well within her rights to kill them.

She’d forced every memory in all four of them to merge into one sensation and forced them all to feel it, all of it, all at once. Their bodies had literally burst from the pressure inside.

Pieces had been counted, and there wasn’t enough for even one person to survive.

Bill had been called in to look after Solarin, and so far there had been no word from him, but they assumed he was doing what Solarin needed him to do.

“Remus?”

“Sam, thank goodness.” Remus hugged him as he came to a stop. “He won’t let her near him, and Lucius had him for an hour and a half, and Ron babbled a load of stuff about what he saw but he was in so much pain, he didn’t make sense.”

“Easy, Remus,” Sam soothed. “Easy. He’s unharmed enough to be fighting the nurse, so he’s doing well. Just…go get a cup of tea or check on Sirius or something. Let me try and help him. Take a break, Alpha.”

Remus rubbed at his eyes and groaned. “You’re right. I’ll go look after Miri, have someone Harry trusts with her.”

Sam waited until he’d gone before he approached the worried nurse.

“Sam Jones, family Healer,” he said, holding out a hand.

“Maria Summers, Matron of Hogwarts. I’m fairly certain he’s been raped,” she murmured. “The way he moves, the way he holds himself…he’s in pain.”

“Alright, I can take it from here,” he promised. “He’s a prickly customer. Take care of the others, I’ll handle this one.”

She hovered for a moment, chewing at her thumb, before she nodded and moved away. Sam slowly approached the bed. Harry could not get any closer to the headboard, literally. Any closer and he’d melt into the metal.

Sam picked up the pillows as he went and perched on the end of the bed, putting them between him and his terrified nephew.

“Harry. It’s just me now,” he promised. “Just you and me. We don’t even need to talk about what happened tonight. We can talk about how your exams went. I hear you managed to complete the Animagus spell. What can you become?”

“A teacup Pomeranian puppy,” Harry murmured.

“Aren’t they incredibly tiny?”

“I fit in a pocket. It’s w-where Ron hid me.”

“Clever. Isn’t that blood getting annoying?” Sam asked, motioning to the cut above Harry’s right eye and the one on his lip. “I can clean it up for you. I have some salves that can ease the pain.”

Harry’s lower lips trembled. “I want Severus,” he whispered.

“I know you do, pup, and if I could, I’d get him for you. He lost some blood. Not a lot, but some, enough for him to need some sleep to let the potions work. He and Ron are sleeping it off right now.”

“C-cut him.”

“I know, Sirius told me. But he’s okay, Harry, I promise you. On my life, I swear to you that he and Ron are both going to be just fine.”

“Ron save-saved me.”

“I heard that. He’s a remarkable young man, and I’m sure Hermione will thank him thoroughly when he’s feeling up to it.”

That got him a slight twitch of Harry’s mouth, which Sam counted as a win.

“He t-touched me,” Harry whispered, eyes swimming with tears, wrapping his arms around himself.

“And Solarin made sure he got what he deserved.” He shifted slightly, as if getting comfortable. “I’m guessing he hurt you, when he touched you. Does it still hurt there?”

Harry nodded.

“I can help, if you’ll let me. I know I’m not as good as Severus, but I do love you very much, pup. I don’t like to see you in pain.”

Harry stared at him for the longest moment of Sam’s life. “Maybe…m-maybe you c-could start with my…m-my face,” he suggested, and Sam’s heart broke for how incredibly brave he was being.

“Sure. Let me get some gauze and water and things and I’ll take a look at your face.”

Sam opened the curtains around his bed while he gathered things, letting Harry see everything. Harry felt better with them open. It let him see the windows and the door, and he could see the other beds with Severus and Ron asleep in them. Soon enough Sam was putting a tray of things on his bedside table.

“Sol?” he whispered as Sam moved the pillows to the end of the bed.

“She’s in the Dungeons, she needs to be isolated for a bit,” he said honestly. He knew Harry would resent him forever if he told the slightest lie right now. “She did a lot, pushed herself really far. She needs some time to heal.”

“Miri!”

“She’s fine, Remus is with her. We got lucky, she slept through it all,” he promised as he sorted through his supplies. “The magic in the stones of the Castle interfered with your connection to her. She could still feel you were close, but she can’t pick up anything from you if you’re in a different room. We’re lucky she’s still so little. If she were older, she might have picked up more. But she didn’t. She’s fine.”

Harry nodded and let Sam put gentle fingers under his chin, tilting his head up. The ointment on the cloth stung as it touched his skin, but then that patch went numb as it began to work. Soon his face was clean and numbed, and Sam was still smiling softly at him.

“These look pretty shallow, probably won’t scar,” Sam said. “You’ll be bruised, but it’ll fade.” He discarded the bloodied gauze. “How about this. You can just tell me where it hurts, and I’ll make the pain better. We don’t have to talk about what happened if you don’t want to, you don’t have to tell me how you got hurt. Just where it hurts. How’s that?”

Harry nodded and held out his hands, and Sam internally groaned. All Harry’s fingers were broken.

“Okay, let’s see here,” he said. “Looks like it’s just the fingers, not further up, which is good. I’ll do the spell and then splint them for tonight, just to let them settle. Just a few hours. And I think we’re only going to need soft splints, just to keep you from moving too fast. Sound good?”

Madame Summers kept the end of the ward empty so Sam could leave the curtains open, and Harry was slow and reluctant but he did let Sam take care of him. The only other broken bones were his ribs, which Sam applied a salve and wrapped. The rest was bruising, which was lucky. Some deep scratches that had drawn blood and a few bleeding bite-marks, but it was all stuff that would fade with time and care.

“Harry…I know we said we wouldn’t talk about it,” Sam said gently. “But the way you’re moving…I know you’re in pain down there. You said he touched you. Did he touch you there?”

Harry nodded, looking away in shame.

“It’s okay, Harry. This was not your fault, none of it. You have absolutely nothing to feel ashamed of.” Harry managed to give him a shaky attempt at a smile. “Right. I know you don’t want anyone but Severus touching you there. So how about this. I’ll just look. I won’t touch you, I’ll just look, see if there’s any major damage. That sound okay?”

“I guess.”

Harry allowed the curtains closed for this part and he slowly pulled off what was left of his jeans. They had been his favourite, and the green shirt that lay in tatters. He didn’t even want to keep his red Doc Martens. They were all tainted now, touched by Lucius.

“Don’t t-tell?” Harry begged and Sam had to take a deep breath so he didn’t scoop him up in a tight hug.

“I won’t tell anyone, Harry, not unless you want me to. This is just between us, I swear.”

“And Severus,” Harry demanded.

“And Severus,” Sam agreed. “Just us three.”

Harry nodded and picked at the blanket covering him. It took a while but eventually he laid down and rolled onto his side, his back to Sam.

“Just the blanket, Harry, just so I can see,” he assured as he moved it away from Harry’s hips, careful not to touch him. “Okay. Do you think you can open yourself, so I can see your anus?”

Harry took a deep breath before he reached down and pulled at his buttock, exposing himself.

“I see a little blood, which tells me there is some tearing, but the amount of blood tells me it can wait for Severus to see to it. That’s it, I’m done.”

Harry let go and sighed as Sam covered him over again.

“Did he put himself inside your female parts?”

Harry shook his head. “He had…hadn’t got to that…n-not yet. Ron came before he…”

“Good, one less thing that hurts. Did he…no, that’s not…sorry, bad wording. Is there anything else he did that hurts?”

“My throat hurts,” Harry admitted.

“I see. Can I take a look?”

Harry carefully sat up and obediently said ‘Ah’.

“Little red, but nothing some ice cream can’t help,” he said with a smile, shaking out the pyjamas he’d found. “Stick to soft foods for a day or two and it should go all by itself. Come on, let’s get you dressed. You can bathe in a few hours, once the salves have all sunk in.”

Harry slowly pulled them on and got back into bed, curling up as Sam opened the curtains. He watched Severus sleep. He was just about to creep across and climb in with him when the doors opened and in came Remus and Sirius.

“Hey, pup,” Remus said. “Mum arrived, she’s with Miri, and Dobby. He’s refusing to leave Miri. Severus ordered him to protect her with his life.”

Harry nodded and reached out a hand. Remus was quick to climb onto the bed and cuddle Harry close. The sprite curled close, his splinted fingers tangled in Remus’ shirt so he couldn’t leave. Sirius transformed into Snuffles and climbed up, lending his warmth to the shaking teen.

“Easy, easy,” Remus soothed as Harry was wracked by a particularly strong shudder. “You’re safe now. I’ve got you, pup. We’ve got you.”

Hermione raised her head from where she had been sleeping, half in the chair by Ron’s bed, half on his legs. She checked on Ron and then made her way over to Harry.

“Are you okay?” she whispered, tears in her eyes.

He nodded and let her hold his hand.

“Not your fault,” he whispered. “I thought it was Severus too. Is Ron okay?”

“Oh, he’ll be just fine. Battle scar for him to brag over, be all manly with.” She perched by Sirius’ flank. “It’s you we’re all worried about.”

“I’ll be fine,” he promised. “Just need some time.”

They looked over as Severus groaned. Harry wriggled to get up but Hermione settled him down, crossing to Severus.

“You’re okay, Severus,” she promised. “You’re in the Hospital Wing. You’ve had your throat cut, but it wasn’t very deep. You lost some blood. You’ve had potions and some sleep. Harry is fine, a little battered, but fine.”

It took him a few minutes to get his bearings, and then he was up and across the ward to Harry. Remus and Sirius moved away, letting Severus take their place. They all moved off to give the pair privacy.

Severus curled into the bedding with him, holding him close and feeling the way his shudders were slowly subsiding. It would take time for Harry to heal from the events of the night, but he was in far better shape than when they had last recovered him from Lucius’ clutches.

Eventually, as the sun filtered into the ward, Harry stopped shaking and ran a careful fingertip over Severus’ throat, tracing the red line.

“Love, what did he do to you?” Severus asked, stroking back his hair and looking over the cuts and bruises.

“He took me,” Harry whispered. “You know…like that.”

“Oh, Harry,” he moaned, wishing Harry had said anything else. He had hoped they would find Harry fast enough that Lucius wouldn’t have had time to do anything sexual to him.

“I’m okay.”

“Where did he take you?”

“My throat,” he admitted. “And my bum.”

“But not where I have you?” he checked.

“No, not there. I’m still yours, he didn’t get to that part. He was going to, but Ron distracted him and I changed.” He snuggled closer. “Ron hid me in his pocket.”

“I don’t think I will ever be able to express enough gratitude to Ronald Weasley,” Severus vowed. He ran a careful fingertip over the soft bandaging on Harry’s fingers. “Were these broken again?”

Harry nodded. “And my ribs. Sam made it better.”

“Ah. Sam,” he called.

“Severus,” Sam said, popping around the next bed. “Good to see you up.”

“Anything I should know? Harry said you made him better.”

Sam took the bedside seat and glanced around to ensure they weren’t being overheard. “There’s some anal tearing. I didn’t touch, visual assessment only, so I’m not sure, but the amount of blood says to me it’s relatively small, shouldn’t take too much to heal.” He dug out a small jar from his bag and put it on the bedside table. “Should be fine after an application or two of that. As for the rest, he had a couple of broken ribs and his fingers were all broken, I fixed those, used some healing salves. A few hours and they’ll have soaked in enough and he’s fine to take a bath. Mostly it’s bruising and some cuts here and there. A few…uh…”

“Just tell him,” Harry said. “He’s seen it all before.”

“Some scratches, some were fairly substantial but not deep enough for stitches. A few bite marks. If we’re lucky, they won’t scar, but I’m not sure. They might.”

“Nice healing bath for you, young man,” Severus said gently, stroking Harry’s hair. The sprite nodded and Severus pressed a kiss to his scar, making Harry wiggle in happiness. “Where is Sol?”

“Dungeons,” Sam said. “I haven’t seen her, Bill has. She’s defenceless, completely bare. She needs some time to heal.”

Sirius and Remus approached cautiously, trays of food in their hands.

“You can join us, it’s okay,” Severus assured.

It took a little cajoling but Severus managed to get Harry to sit up enough to eat a little. He slowly worked his way through a bowl of yogurt with fresh sliced fruit. He passed on the cereal, but accepted the cup of sweet tea. Once they’d eaten, Madame Summers and Sam were happy for them to leave. She wanted to keep Ron one more day, just to be sure, and the redhead was still out for the count so they were all happy to leave him in her care.

Miri was drawing with Nixie when they entered. She took one look at Harry and whimpered, reaching for him. Anne managed to tamp down whatever she felt when looking at her grandson’s pain and instead fussed about putting things away and generally straightening the room.

“I’m okay, baby, I’m okay,” he promised, settling into an armchair so Miri could cuddle into him. “I got hurt, but Sam made me better.”

“Ouch,” she said, her little hand hovering over his face.

“Yeah, I got some ouches. But it’s okay. Auntie Sol made the bad people go away. And Uncle Ron kept me safe when he found me. And Uncle Sam put on special creams and made it better.”

“Daddy kiss it better?”

“Yes, Daddy kissed it better. And I’m going to take a nice bath with some potions in it, and I’ll feel much better.”

She nodded and snuggled him, little fingers griping his pyjama top. It took a while but eventually she let him go to the bathroom with Severus, staying with her grandpa’s and Dobby, who still wouldn’t leave.

Severus filled the sunken tub and poured in several potions before adding salts and bubbles.

“Come on, love. In we go.”

Harry took shaky breaths as he and Severus got his pyjamas off, and then he shied away from Severus’ eyes.

“No,” Severus demanded. “Don’t ever hide from me. I love you, every single part of you, and I am not ashamed of these marks. I know you fought him, without you even having to say it. I know you did. And I am so fucking proud of you.”

“He broke my wand,” Harry sniffed.

“We’ll get you a new one. A wand can be replaced, you cannot be.”

“I couldn’t fight four of them. I tried, but I couldn’t.”

“But you did fight. No one could ask any more than that,” Severus assured, cupping his cheeks and pulling him in for a cautious kiss. He was filled with confidence when Harry kissed back, leaning into him.

“I fought. I might have lost, but I fought.”

“Just so.”

“Take off these,” Harry said, tugging at the pyjamas Severus was wearing. “Soak with me.”

Severus did as he was asked and the two of them sank into the hot water. Harry hissed as it hit his skin and slowly relaxed as the remedies in the water began to work, easing is soreness and wounds. Severus carefully removed the splints on his fingers. They were achy but not broken, so he was happy. He swished his hands through the water, playing with the bubbles. Severus carefully rubbed shampoo into his damp hair, taking his time and massaging his scalp.

Harry washed Severus’ hair and then straddled him, laying his head on his shoulder as Severus picked up the bar of soap. Carefully, he began to bathe his little husband, slow slick sweeps over his skin. He carefully reached between Harry’s legs and cleansed his penis and balls, his soft folds, his inner thighs.

“Do you want to do this part?” he whispered, placing a light hand on Harry’s buttock.

“No. You do it.”

“Sure?”

“You touch me.”

“Ah, I see.”

Harry wanted Severus to touch where Lucius had, to reclaim all the parts of him Lucius had tried to lay claim to.

Severus set aside the bar of soap and grabbed some of the salve Sam had given. He had brewed it himself, and knew it would survive the water. He was cautious with his slick fingers, and he slowly found Harry’s swollen hole. He doubted the bastard had even bothered to use lubricant, and there was obviously not a chance that he had stretched Harry. He stroked the tight furl, working in the salve and feeling Harry sigh as some of the pain began to recede.

“Is it helping?” he whispered.

“Feels better,” Harry confirmed. “It’s…he…there’s…inside.”

“Soon, I’ll get to that soon. Just relax, love. Let yourself relax.”

Severus didn’t know how long he spent massaging the salve into the ring of muscle. Long enough for the water to need a top up of hot from the tap. Severus reached for the salve as he returned from the other end of the tub.

“Turn around for me, love,” he prompted. “Lean over the edge of the tub, let me see what I’m working with.”

Harry blushed but turned, levering himself up and laying on a folded towel, his legs swishing in the water. Severus could see the redness of the abused hole, but there didn’t seem to be any fresh blood. He scooped up a blob of ointment and carefully began to work a finger into his lover. Harry hissed and he backed up a little, working just a tip inside until Harry relaxed.

“I know, it doesn’t feel very nice. But it will help, Harry, I promise.”

“I know. It just sucks right now.”

“Mmmm. I remember.”

“Did you use this salve when you were…younger?”

“I did. The Dark Lord wasn’t exactly careful with me,” he said. Their conversation was distracting Harry from what Severus was doing, and he took the opportunity to add another finger.

“Ah!”

“Sorry, love, sorry. I just need a little more room to get this inside you.”

“Sod it, just be quick.”

Severus kissed his lower back as he efficiently worked two fingers past the sore rim, stretching Harry just enough so that he had room to push the salve up inside his torn passage. He was thankful Harry was as quiet as he could be, sparing him as much as he could from his hisses of pain as he was breached. As Sam had guessed, there were only a few small tears, nothing that wouldn’t heal on its own with a little time and assistance. He removed his fingers once half the little pot was used up.

“Think you can keep that inside for a few hours?” he asked, rubbing Harry’s hips.

“I think so. How long is best?”

“Oh, the longer the better, but six hours is a minimum of what it needs.”

“I can manage that, I think,” he said, turning and cuddling in. He couldn’t raise his arms to loop his arms around Severus’ neck, his ribs really didn’t like it when he tried, but it was enough to cuddle close. “He’s dead,” Harry whispered. “It’s over.”

Severus held him as he began to cry, great heaving sobs tearing through his body. It took him over completely, tears streaming down his face, splashing into the water. Severus didn’t try to soothe him, didn’t offer meaningless words of comfort that wouldn’t help. He simply held him close, rocked him, let him get it all out.

All the fear and pain, the uncertainty, the long months of captivity, the suffering, the question of his own survival. The questions over wanting Miri, the worry over his loved ones and their own relationship. All the healing he’d done and still to do.

Every time Lucius had touched him, hit him, forced him. All the fear and pain and degradation. The hollow pain of starvation, the ache of his body wasting away, the scars he would carry for the rest of his life.

All of it and more. The years of the Dursley’s abuse and neglect. The see-saw of public opinion. The constant press scrutiny. The Ministry. Voldemort. Cedric Diggory.

Harry had been through more than any person could be expected to handle, yet he had. He was so impossibly young but the strongest person Severus had ever met. He had the biggest heart, so much love to give. He was kind and gentle, fiery and passionate. He was an incredible mother, and an amazing husband. He gave his all, in every single thing he did, and Severus could never imagine being without him, not even for a day.

Whatever would come, whatever the future held, there would never be any question of how they would handle it.

Together. As always.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it, all over. 
> 
> I started writing this story almost nine years ago. Since I started, I've graduated from university, become a sister for the third time, got a job, lost a job, been diagnosed with PCOS and Aspergers Syndrome. I've had laser treatment and a cancer scare. I've lost friends and gained them. I've lost my uncle to diabetes complications, and my mother has moved away, giving me custody of my teenage sister. My nan has been diagnosed with cancer, and I've discovered IKEA. 
> 
> Ups and downs, highs and lows, and through it all you've all been there. It amazes me every day that anyone would take the time to read my work, and I am in complete disbelief that you like it, enough to leave comments and kudos even. 
> 
> To those of you who have been here from word one, way back on AFF, you guys have serious staying power. To those a little newer, a few chapters back, you guys rock. To everyone and anyone who has made it this far, reading something this big and involved, you are all rock stars.
> 
> To all my readers, old and new, I love you all so much and I am so thankful to have each and every one of you every single day. You're all awesome, and I hope you'll return to the world I've made here for the next chapter in Harry's journey.


End file.
